Haruka opened the door, smiling widely when she saw her daughter's face. The raven-haired girl's expression, however, caused the smile to disappear. Her clothes were a mess, her hair sticking up in all directions and her arms wrapped tightly around herself. But the worse were her eyes. They were cold and dull with pain. She brushed past the tall blonde without a word and rushed upstairs. "Hotaru-" "I don't want to talk about it," the younger girl said softly, her voice hoarse. Michiru came out just in time to see Hotaru race up the stairs. She stared worriedly at her lover, whose blue eyes narrowed. "Hino." . Hotaru lay on the bed, curled up while her unfocused eyes stared at the wall. She wore the skirt she had on last night but a different shirt. The one from last night was on the ground of the parking lot and her turtleneck somewhere in the club. She was vaguely aware that it had been her favorite sweater and most comfortable shirt, but that didn't matter now. What did matter? Perhaps the fact that she had finally kissed Rei last night. Maybe it was the two of them making love until after the sun came up. Or was it her leaving? Violet eyes closed painfully at the memory. ..... Flashback ..... Hotaru moaned softly as she opened her eyes. The first thing she saw was Rei's face close to hers. Her long lashes brushed against her silky skin and a smile rested peacefully on her red lips. The beauty that greeted Hotaru was enough for her to forget everything else. She first noticed the fact that Rei was holding her tightly, pressing their bodies together. She shifted a little, realizing that one arm was curled against Rei's heart and the other was draped over the miko's waist possessively. Hotaru could smell the proof of last night's activities mixing with Rei's scent of jasmine and vanilla, with a hint of burnt spices. 'She smokes,' Hotaru finally realized. Her nose always detected a faint scent of herbs, burnt herbs to be precise, but never quite placed it. Now that she has, she wasn't annoyed or disgusted. The smell was faint and oddly reassuring... even pleasant. Hotaru snuggled deeper into the woman's embrace, feeling more content now than all the happy moments in all three of her lives combined. It just seemed so right, lying in bed with Rei, wrapped in her arms and her scent. "Hmmm... Mina..." Cloud nine crashed to the ground as violet eyes snapped open, her blood running cold. Did Rei just say... Oh god. It was a cruel joke. All of it. She was happy, so damn happy. But the miko had to... Hotaru tore herself from the embrace of the one she loved, not caring if it would wake her. It didn't. The college student collapsed on the floor, her body numb to the cold morning air. Her eyes filled with tears as they gazed at the floor. It was a lie. All of it. The dancing, the kissing, the touching... the love making. 'It wasn't love making!' Hotaru screamed in her mind as she sobs tore through her throat. 'It was sex! Face it, Tomoe, you got played. You let your fucking lust control you. And you did the only thing you didn't want to, you had mindless sex with her.' Hotaru scrambled to her feet, hands shaking as she gathered her clothes. She wanted to have meaningless sex before, she thought it wouldn't matter as long as she had Rei. She must have been insane. It hurt... so much. To know Rei had slept with her but it meant nothing... She was just another Minako replacement. The thought caused more tears to well up in the dark orbs already filled with evidence of her pain. Hotaru ran out of Rei's bedroom and into the living room of the apartment that she had come to see as another home. But now it seemed so foreign and too painful to bear. The college student ran to the door, grabbing a shirt she had left on the couch, pulling it on. She slammed the door of the apartment shut... and never looked back. ..... End ..... The pain intensified as she lay on the bed, alone while the memories washed over her. The best night of her life had meant nothing. She had just been a doll, a replacement for the one Rei really wanted. It was just sex. The tears started anew. . Rei sat on the cold, hardwood floor of her living room, back against a wall. She ignored the bitter cold biting her tank top clad form as her hand moved gracefully to give her lips access to the bottle. Taking a long drink, she stopped only when the contents of the bottle were emptied. The miko staggered to her feet, making her way to the bar. "Hino! Open this fucking door! I know you're in there, damn it!" Lavender eyes didn't even blink at the pounding on her door, which had been going on for half an hour already. She moved the cigarette from her fingers to her mouth in order to open the bottle of wine in her hand. The door slammed open and she could feel the intense glare coming from the blue eyes of Haruka Tenoh. But she ignored it. Without acknowledging the blonde's presence, Rei made her way back to where she's been sitting for the past six hours. Or was it seven? It seemed like much longer. Haruka took in the sight of the businesswoman taking a drag of her cigarette, empty boxes of Rei's favorite smokes and bottles of alcohol littering the floor. The smell of smoke hung heavily in the air as did the smell of alcohol, reminding Haruka of a trashy bar. The woman's hair was dull and a complete mess, her tank top crumpled. Despite how utterly horrible she looked, it did nothing to hide the grace the miko possessed, seen every time she pressed the bottle to her lips. And the blonde wondered why she's never seen it before. How she never saw what a mess her friend had become. How she was in too deep for them not to do anything. And that made the guilt in her heart intensify. She's always known Rei needed help, but she never did anything. She wondered why she didn't notice how beautiful Rei was before. She was too busy convincing herself that Hotaru could do better to see why her daughter would love the woman. Regardless of her drunken stupor, ignoring the mess in her appearance and the darkness of her eyes, she was gorgeous. The pale, creamy skin, the long black hair, the grace that she possessed, similar to Haruka's own lover, and the strong but battered aura she had made Rei Hino a very tempting woman. Haruka's anger weakened slightly at the miserable sight the woman made. "What did you do?" Rei didn't seem to hear the question and took another drink of wine. Haruka growled. "Hino." Yet again, there was no response. "Damn it, answer me!" When still there was no acknowledgement, Haruka grabbed the miko by the shoulders, raising her to her feet then harshly slamming her into the wall. "Answer me! What the hell did you do!" Rei tilted her head back back, trembling. The blonde panicked, wondering if she'd made her friend cry. But she was wrong. The sound of bitter and insane laughter filled the silent apartment. Haruka released the miko and stepped back. Rei crumbled to the ground, her body shaking furiously as she laughed. "What I did, Haruka?" She screamed in half-desperation, half-insanity. "What I did was take her to a bar last night. What I did was dance with her until I felt my restraint break. What I did was take her to bed." At the confirmation of her fears, Haruka's fists shook and her jaw clenched. How dare she? How dare she take Hotaru's innocence away? The pitiful woman's body was then wracked with sobs as tears fell from the dead lavender eyes. But the laughter never stopped. "What I did was let myself get lost in the passion and the excitement of being loved again. What I did... I believed, Haruka... I let myself feel safe... oh gods, I left myself feel." The heartbroken sobs coming from the miko rooted Haruka to her spot after the confession. No, this couldn't be right. She did something to Hotaru, that's why her daughter was locked in her room, crying. Hino had no right to shed tears. "Gods, Haruka, what did I do wrong? Why did she leave? I thought she'd be the one to never leave. Tell me... what did I do?" The tall woman had no answer as she watched the broken woman curl into a ball, tears flowing from her eyes. And the desperation and the pain there reminded her of what she had seen in Hotaru's eyes that morning. And once again, she could do nothing but watch. . Haruka stood outside Hotaru's door anxiously. Seconds later, Michiru stepped out, holding an empty tray. The blonde sighed in relief. "Did she eat it?" "She was finally asleep, so I left it on the table." The blonde woman nodded and followed her lover back down to the living room. The two sat down on the couch, Michiru snuggling against her girlfriend. "What are we going to do?" "Nothing." The response shocked the musician, causing her to look up sharply. "What?" "I mean it, Michi. Rei... you should have seen her. She was miserable. I don't know what happened and quite honestly, neither does she." Michiru buried her face in her girlfriend's shoulder. "What went wrong?" "I don't know. Should we ask Setsuna?" "No, you know her answer. Only Minako can get anything out of her." Haruka's face hardened at the name. It wasn't Minako's fault... but it kind of was, at the same time. "You don't think they're not meant to be... do you?" The violinist felt the strong arms around her tighten at her question. "I don't know anything, Michi, except they love each other." . Utena cursed as she continued pounding on the door. Where the fuck was she? Two days of no calls, not picking up her phone or her cell, not responding to emails and not showing up for work. Where the hell was that idiot? "Rei! Open up, damn it, or help me god, I'll break down this door!" The businesswoman prepared to ram the door when it opened. She heard soft footsteps moving away and pushed the door open. It was a complete mess. Cigarette boxes, empty bottles of vodka, wine, scotch, whiskey and cans of beer littered the floor. The shocked brown eyes then turned to Rei, who grabbed another can of beer from the fridge. She popped the lid open and downed the can in a single gulp. When she was done, the can was thrown over her shoulder. "What the hell happened?" Rei turned around, the bags under her eyes accenting her dull eyes, pale skin and messy hair. "Why does everyone keep asking me that?" "Have you taken a look around lately?" The miko shrugged and walked over to the coffee table, picking up a box of her smokes. "Rei... what happened?" Lavender eyes flashed with annoyance as they gazed at the older woman for asking the question that was just shot down seconds ago. Utena watched as the weary woman sat down on the couch. "Don't you ever shut up, Utena?" The woman smiled sadly and took a seat next to her pitiful looking friend. The friend she at one point loved. "If I shut up, who would talk some sense into you?" Rei grunted and took a drag from her cigarette. Her business partner shook her head. "Why do this to yourself?" Inmoveable brown clashed with burning purple when the younger woman snapped to look at her. The dark orbs flickered with a hint of the anger the woman felt, returning them to their rightful lavender color for a second. "Do you think I like feeling like this? Do you think I did this on purpose? Do you?" Rei looked away when she felt the tears come again. Damn it, not now. She thought she cried all her tears years ago. "Rei..." The woman addressed squeezed her eyes shut, her friend's sympathetic tone cutting her like Hotaru's departure had. It shouldn't, but she was too fragile now to even stand the pity that should have disgusted her. "Oh, my poor, poor Pye." Utena drew the shaking woman into her arms, rubbing calming circles on her back. She felt her tears dampening her shirt, but paid it no heed. "Rei, let it all out. There's always tomorrow." . Hikari, Megumi and Sara sat nervously in the living room, wondering why Haruka and Michiru had called them here. "Well, sorry to keep you waiting." They all looked at the blonde that came downstairs just as her counterpart entered with a tray of tea. "It's quite all right, Tenoh-san." "Please, Hikari, Haruka will do fine." "Haruka-san..." The three college students froze, the familiarity of the situation returning. Only it was with Rei and not the blonde before them. Michiru placed the tea before her guests, taking in the collective dark expressions as she sat down next to her lover. "I'm sure you're all wondering why we called you here." The three nodded. "It's about Hotaru, as I'm sure you've all figured out," Michiru said continuing. More nods. "Where is she?" Sara said, finally voicing the question on all three college students' minds. Haruka sighed and ran a hand through her short hair. "Upstairs." Hikari placed a hand on Sara's knee, preventing the blonde from standing. If not for the grim situation, Haruka would've smiled at the act. "May we see her?" The tall brunette asked, ever the polite one. "I'm afraid not. She finally fell asleep again an hour ago." Sara arched a brow at the new information. Hikari decided they needed to be calm, so that's what she'll be. "What do you mean, 'finally fell asleep again'? Is something troubling her?" "She hasn't really slept these past two days..." "Why not?" Megumi asked, rather harshly. Haruka usually didn't tolerate rude behavior, but seeing as how this stems from concern for her daughter, she'd let it slide. "She's been," Michiru started, unsure of what to say, "crying." Megumi stood, ready to run up to her friend's room, but Hikari reached over and tugged on her arm, forcing her to sit. The taller girl didn't look much calmer, though. "Why?" Megumi demanded, angry. Both Haruka and Michiru hesitated. How much should they tell? "Rei." Everyone looked at Hikari, who had a wistful look in her eyes. Sara nodded. "That's what I thought. The happiness from the fair couldn't last for long, no matter how much we wish it could." "Hino? I'm going to kill her." "Megumi," Hikari called firmly, "sit." The brunette opened her mouth to argue, but in the end obeyed her friend. Hikari was usually right. "Are we correct, Michiru-san?" Sara asked, regarding the aqua-haired woman. The senshi of the sea wondered why the blonde asked her. Haruka was a far worse liar. Michiru was a master of the craft, though she rarely used it. Sara was very much like her, actually, personality aside. A balance between Megumi and Haruka's impulsiveness and Setsuna and Hikari's rational thought process. So, the girl felt she could read her better. Very well. "Yes, you are." Megumi stood again, this time to pace the living room while mumbling darkly under her breath. "How do you know about Rei?" Haruka asked. Hikari calmly explained how they had first met the miko at the college and then the fair. Both of the guardians looked surprised when they heard the source of the necklace they saw on their daughter's neck. A few seconds after the explanation, the ranting Megumi calmed enough to sit back down, though still grumbling occasionally. Silence drifted over the five women like a thick veil. "What happened?" Sara finally asked. Seeing the two women hesitate, she continued. "We need to know so we can help." Haruka looked unconvinced but explained nonetheless. "Hotaru came home two days ago, looking like a mess. She went up to her room and never came out. She didn't tell us anything at all." Hikari nodded. There was no need to guess what had happened. Unresolved sexual tension covered Rei and Hotaru like the plague. From the look in her blonde friend's eyes, she thought the same. "Haruka went to Rei's apartment for answer to find her..." "A complete mess," Haruka finished with a sigh. The three younger women soaked this in. Megumi was the first to speak, strangely calm. "They slept together." Everyone was shocked at how indifferent and flat she sounded. They figured she'd be bouncing off the walls. "I figured as much," she said dryly. "The two are in love, no doubt about it. Despite how innocent Hotaru appears, she's not a virgin, even before Hino." Haruka visibly struggled with the news while Hikari and Sara groaned inwardly. 'Smooth, Megumi,' they both thought. 'Drop another bomb on them.' "She... she what?" Megumi snapped her mouth shut. Crap, did she just let that slip? Oh... man... Michiru saw her lover rise and decided to calm the blonde before she blew up. Besides, judging by the nervous look on Sara's face, she had something to do with it. "Haruka, we'll handle this later." The racer calmed and sat back down, but glared at the coffee table, pretending it was whoever stole her little girl's innocence. "Why did you call us here, exactly? What do you wish for us to do?" "Whatever you can, Hikari," Michiru said, shaking her head. "Whatever you can." Te three determined college students nodded. All right, time for operation "Cheer up Hotaru." "Would you like to stay for dinner?" Sara nodded quickly at the sea nymph's question. This was one woman that could cook! Hikari and Megumi agreed as well. Michiru stood, moving to the kitchen. Hikari and Sara went with her to help, leaving Megumi alone with a brooding Haruka. Finally, the motorcyclist turned to the brunette with a smile the younger girl did not like. "So," Haruka purred as she leaned forward, "tell me about Hotaru's first."
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