Chapter 4: No
Regrets
Sawako grinned as she put the
groceries away. She glanced at her watch, pleased it was still early.
She surveyed her apartment, and everything seemed to be in place. It
was Friday. Almost a week had passed since the day at the beach with
Mugi. Thanks to younger woman's busy schedule with her parents and Sawako
being occupied with work, they did not have much chance to see
each other. Tonight would be different though. While messaging each
other one night, Sawako impetuously extended an invitation to dinner
at her place. Mugi's response, an instantaneous 'I would love to!'
She looked at the clock again
to make sure she had enough time to prepare dinner before she began
cooking. It was some time later when she wiped her brow, a small smirk
of satisfaction on her face. Her miniscule kitchen was ridiculously
hot and she decided to open a few other windows to alleviate the heat
of the apartment. As she walked back into the small space the
oven dinged and she happily exclaimed “Right on time!” There were
only a few little finishing touches left. Another quick glimpse of her
watch showed she had half hour to get dressed and so she dashed into
the bathroom.
Donning a pair of jeans, a white
camisole and a favorite beige sweater, she hunted for a pair of earrings
to complete the outfit. She happened to spot a pair of jade ones an
ex had given her when she suddenly remembered she had forgotten one
thing. “Shit!” She cursed out loud the same moment her phone rang.
She picked up to hear Mugi chirp, “Hi Sawako-sensei! I'm on the train,
and will be arriving soon.”
“Oh,
Mugi! I forgot something necessary, so I have to go out. I'll meet you
at the station instead.” Sawako improvised. She did not want the young
woman to appear at the apartment only to wait for her hostess.
“Excellent.
I'll see you soon, sensei!” Sawako could practically feel the warmth
Mugi's voice radiated as they ended the call. She felt a small tremor
as she thought of Mugi's lips. 'I will not push. I will not push.' The
teacher repeated the mantra under her breath as she locked her door
behind her and headed for the station. She lived surprisingly close
to it and the train would have been a godsend traveling to Sakura High
School if she did not have a car. Several cherry blossoms fell
on her head and as she walked, she absently brushed aside the petals.
She let her mind wander and ended up free associating on several different
topics, blossoms, graduation, Mugi, Mugi calling her 'sensei'. She wondered
if Mugi would easily agree to drop the sensei following her name since
they no longer had a student-teacher relationship.
The girl in question gently called
out to Sawako as the teacher was still deep in thought. She looked up,
a smile quickly coming to her lips. She would have liked to greet Mugi
with a kiss but settled instead for a quick squeeze of her hand since
they were in public with many people milling about. They walked towards
a neighborhood shop, exchanging small talk, thrilled to be in the others
presence.
“Yo,
Sawa-chan!”, shouted a pleasant male voice. Sawako cursed under her
breath as the stranger approached and she recognized him. Mugi noted
the teacher did not look happy to see him.
“Hello
Kouji.” Her voice held the barest hint of civility.
“Hey,
Sawa-chan, is that any way to greet an old flame?” His face held a
wide grin the teacher wanted to slap right off his face. Mugi uttered
a surprised gasp but the other two didn't notice. She looked at the
man, he had a lean face with shaggy brown hair tumbling over his forehead,
almost covering his dark eyes. Stubble adorned his face and she
supposed many women might find him good looking, including the teacher.
She suddenly felt a twinge of jealousy, knowing the man in front of
her had probably touched her Sawako in ways she had only dreamt
of.
Turning towards Mugi, he asked
while appraising her, “Who's this blondie? She's cute! She single?”
Mugi suddenly felt revolted but manners dictated giving her name even
in situations like this. She was about to answer when Sawako spoke for
her.
“I
don't see how that's any of your business. Why are you here?” In the
past, Mugi heard many tones in the older woman's voice but never had
she heard such coldness.
“Aww
c'mon. Don't be like that now.” Kouji replied with charm. Except it
didn't work this time. Sawako glared at him. Mugi suddenly spotted the
guitar case on Kouji's back and thought of a way to diffuse the situation.
“Ah,
Kouji-san, are you a musician perhaps?”
He straightened himself and grinned
at Mugi. “Yeah, I am! Me and Sawa-chan go way back. Started in a band.
I'm pretty good but her-,” He nodded towards Sawako for effect, “she's
got some wicked guitar skills.”
Sawako did not acknowledge his
praise, instead her lips were a slash of displeasure. Kouji's grin switched
to a leer.
“Of
course, she's got some wicked skills in be-” He didn't get to finish
the sentence as Sawako hauled off and slugged him in the jaw. Mugi stared,
flabbergasted while Sawako cradled the hand she hit Kouji with.
“Shut
up, asshole!” She snarled, “You don't get to talk about my 'skills'.
You sure as hell did nothing to deserve them!” She grabbed Mugi's
hand and started to walk away. Then she turned back to Kouji and grinned,
lifting her and Mugi's hand together triumphantly.
“By
the way, she's with me.”
His eyes were the size of saucers
as he stared at their retreating back. “Son of a bitch!” He muttered.
As they walked away,Mugi had an
expression of something akin to 'my hero' on her face as she stared
at Sawako's profile, stars in her eyes.
-x-x-x-
Mio stood in front the door at
the Tainaka's residence, her hand shaking as she lifted it to press
the doorbell. Mugi's parting words to her on Sunday had haunted the
raven haired young woman, sending her on a rollercoaster of emotions
during the past couple of days. After thinking about it, Mio finally
worked up the nerve on Tuesday to speak with Ritsu. She knew if she
arranged to spend time with Ritsu beforehand she'd never get around
to discussing the issue plaguing her. Stepping out the door, she almost
made it halfway to the drummer's house. The idea of what she was about
do loomed at the forefront of her mind, and fear took over. She promptly
turned around, all courage lost, doubt and despair taking its place
as she walked back home.
She repeated the process several
times during the week.
As she stood staring at the door,
her finger an inch away from the doorbell, she faltered once more. Flooded
with panic, she stepped backwards. Her back hit the gate and as she
turned to escape the front door opened. Ritsu's mother and younger brother
Satoshi stepped out.
“Mio!”
Mrs. Tainaka exclaimed as she caught sight of the girl, “Ritsu didn't
tell us you were coming over. I swear, that girl forgets everything!”
Mrs. Tainaka said exasperatedly. “Hello, Mio-san!” Satoshi added
with a grin that was very much like his older sister's.
“Er...G-good
evening, Tainaka-san, Satoshi-kun. ” Mio stuttered, “Um, she doesn't
know. I thought I'd just drop by since I was out for a walk.”
“Oh!
Well then, please go ahead, Ritsu is in her room. There's food in the
kitchen, covered in case you girls get hungry. We'll be out for
a while.”
“Don't
let Ritsu eat all the food!” Satoshi added. Mio smiled at him then
turned to Mrs. Tainaka. “Thank you, Tainaka-san. Please enjoy your
evening.”
They left, with Mio standing in
the entryway. As the door closed behind her she felt rooted to the spot.
Suddenly she noticed loud music coming from the direction of Ritsu's
room. She decided at that moment she had two options. She could leave
and stay friends with Ritsu forever. Or she could take Mugi's advice
and take the few footsteps to the energetic girl's room. Her heart
ached as she imagined a repulsed expression on Ritsu's face.
A loud yell of “I'm free!”
pierced Mio's thoughts and she became curious about what the other girl
was doing. She stepped out of her shoes and into the hallway. The music
was so loud it masked her footsteps. The bedroom door was ajar, the
drummer's back to it. Mio became entranced by the sight of Ritsu, who
pretended to beat on the drums in time with the music. The girl was
singing along to the song, which by then Mio recognized as The Who's
I'm Free. She hopped up and down, her short hair bouncing at the enthusiastic
movement, her hips swinging from one side to the next. Mio's face flushed
at the movement as she thought 'I didn't know she could move like
that.' She giggled, titillated and amused all at once at the drummer's
actions.
“I'm
free! ...I'm waiting for you to follow me...”
Ritsu spun around and caught Mio
mid-giggle. She elicited a shocked 'Ahh!', taking a step back.
Unaware a table was right behind her, she toppled backwards, crashing
onto the floor. Mio rushed into the room, panic for her friend
taking over. She knew the accident was her fault, if only she hadn't
snuck up on Ritsu...
Ritsu rubbed her head, groaning
in pain. Mio came to her aid, helping her up. They sat on the edge of
the bed, Mio fussing over the other girl. Ritsu shook her head and pointed
to the cd player. Mio understood immediately and turned the music off.
“Geez,
Mio”. The brown haired girl said as she continued rubbing the sore
spot on her head.
“I'm
sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you-” Mio babbled, anxiety apparent
on her face. She had forgotten for a moment why she was visiting.
Ritsu didn't hear Mio's apology,
instead words falling freely from her lips, “God! What are you now?
Some kind of peeping tom sneaking into people's houses?!!” Mio felt
embarrassed, but another feeling quickly took over.
Ritsu's head sported a lump and
was now hurting twice as much.
-x-x-x-
They entered the apartment, Sawako
holding the door open to let Mugi in before she trudged in. They had
not spoken a word to each other after their encounter with Kouji. Sawako
hissed, her hand throbbing in pain.
“Motherf-”
She did not finish the expletive as her eyes fell on Mugi, finishing
lamely instead with, “...Oh my god, that hurts!” Mugi giggled before
she took Sawako's hand in her own hands, cradling it gently.
“Sawako-sensei...”
“Mugi-chan...”
They both spoke at the same time,
stopped and waited for the other to continue. As the silence stretched,
Mugi politely suggested, “Why don't you go first, Sensei?”
Sawako scratched the back of her
neck with her unhurt hand, her eyes averted. She finally looked at the
expectant girl. “I'm really sorry you had to witness that. Kouji is-was,
a rather unfortunate mistake from my past. But in a way, I'm not that
sorry. Someone like him illustrates how lucky I am right now.” She
caressed the side of Mugi's face, color blooming on the girl's cheek.
Mugi chuckled, “Actually, I
was about to tell you that I thought that was the coolest thing I have
ever seen.” She looked at Sawako adoringly. Once in a while Mugi had
the tendency to surprise the people around her. Now happened to be one
of those times. Sawako didn't know what to say.
A thought hit her and she groaned.
“Oh, crap! I need to serve dinner-” Mugi led her to the low table
in the living room, taking over. “Sensei, why don't you sit and relax.
I'll take care of everything.”
“But-”
Mugi's determined expression stopped Sawako short. “Alright, everything
is in the kitchen already prepared. I just had to bring it all out.”
She explained to the blonde who nodded happily and set off toward the
kitchen. Mugi brought the covered dishes in but not before finding an
ice pack for Sawako's hand. The teacher wondered where Mugi found it
and if she even owned an ice pack. Finally the younger woman settled
down, taking a seat next to Sawako. She uncovered the dishes and gasped
in surprise.
“Oh
my!I had no idea you were such a good cook, Sawako-sensei! Everything
smells delicious. ” The girl exclaimed, surprise evident on her face.
Sawako didn't know whether she should be pleased or insulted at the
younger woman's reaction. She looked at all the food laid out, onigiri(riceball),
some sushi rolls, yakizakana(grilled fish), miso soup and gyoza(dumplings).
She then smiled wryly as she remembered her friends reactions as well.
They had been shocked the freewheeling Sawa-chan knew how to prepare
traditional Japanese dishes and so well too.
She was about to pick up her chopsticks
when Mugi leaned closer to her and asked, “Say 'ah', Sensei.” Automatically
opening her mouth to accept the food, the teacher thought 'Is she
testing my reaction first before she begins eating?'
She chewed, then thought “Nah, Mugi isn't like that.”
Mugi on the other hand had just
taken a bite while thinking, 'Sawako-sensei's lips were on
these chopsticks.' Flavor bloomed in her mouth taking her thoughts
away from Sawako for a moment. “This really tastes wonderful, Sensei!”
She gushed, “How did you learn to cook so well?”
Sawako smiled, happy the young
woman could enjoy her efforts. “Thanks, Mugi-chan. I had a strict
grandmother. She made sure I knew how to cook because she was concerned
about me being a proper housewife.” Her brown eyes rolled at that
prospect. “Imagine her consternation when I became the metal playing
black sheep of the family.” Mugi nodded seriously. She knew exactly
what it felt like to have things expected of her. Whether she liked
it or not. Sawako noticed the younger woman's somber expression.
“Mugi,
eat. We can talk about this stuff later, don't you agree?”
“Of
course, Sensei.” Mugi replied, smiling warmly at the older woman as
she elegantly brought the chopsticks to her lips.
-x-x-x-
“I don't know why you have to
hit me every time, Mio-chan.” Ritsu pouted. “Besides, you
were the one sneaking around in my house. Pervert.” Mio glared but
Ritsu once again ignored the warning signs. She wondered to herself
for the millionth time why she loved an idiot like Ritsu. They were
now sitting on the floor of the drummer's room. She sighed.
“I
didn't sneak as you so nicely put it! Your mother let me in.” Mio
explained. Her ire abated quickly, the girl's reactions
always intense but never lengthy. Especially when it came to Ritsu.
She just couldn't stay mad.
“How's
your head?” She asked.
“It's
not so bad now.” Ritsu answered, not particularly concerned.
In a move that surprised herself
and her friend, Mio's hand gently caressed the spot where Ritsu hit
her head. The drummer stared at her in shocked silence as the hand brushed
through the golden brown locks. Mio forgot herself at that moment, the
tactile sensation of Ritsu's silky hair between her fingers taking over.
Her breathing slowed as she allowed herself to touch Ritsu, who had
taken off her customary yellow hair band to ease the pain.
“Mio.”
The name was spoken softly and woke her from the daze. Seeing just how
close she was to Ritsu, she scooted backwards, shock plain on her face.
“I-I...” She stuttered once again, licking her lips in an unconscious
gesture. The action brought brought Ritsu's amber gaze zoning onto Mio's
plump parted lips. Mio's anxiety hit the roof, she had no words to explain
herself. She was panicking so much she didn't notice Ritsu didn't look
upset at all. The girl squeaked as the drummer suddenly grabbed her
and wrapped her arms around her. She tried pulling away at first but
after a moment let herself melt into Ritsu's embrace. She closed her
eyes, laying her head on the other girl's shoulder.
Ritsu felt Mio's body finally
relaxing. “What's wrong, Mio?” She grew concerned when she heard
and felt the sobs coming from Mio. In response she simply sat there,
rocking with the young woman in her arms. She knew eventually Mio would
tell her whatever was wrong. But she was also confused about Mio's sudden
tenderness towards her a few moments ago. 'Nevermind that,'
she thought to herself, 'I just want to help Mio right now.'
Despite that, she couldn't help thinking how soft Mio felt against
her.
Mio drew a deep breath as her
tears died away. She knew she'd have to explain herself now. She owed
that much to Ritsu. She tightened her grip around the drummer, thinking
maybe this might be the last time she would get to hug her friend. The
thought brought fresh tears to her eyes but through sheer will she refrained
from giving in. It had gotten dark while the two girls sat on the floor,
indicating quite some time had passed. Mugi's words came unbidden to
her mind. “Yeah...no regrets.” She whispered.
Ritsu wondered what Mio's words
meant and was about to ask when the grey eyed girl pulled back and looked
her squarely in the face. Mio's direct gaze was so unlike her but there
was something in the depths of her eyes that convinced the usually vivacious
drummer to hold back. Her face drew close to Ritsu's, her lips
parted, her breathing slow. Tears welled at the corners of her eyes.
The drummer froze in place, asking herself if Mio was doing what she
thought she was doing. Her amber eyes wide open as Mio's drifted
closer, their lips touching for what seemed an eternity but only lasted
a moment.
“Mio?”,
Ritsu whispered in a dazed manner. Mio, glanced at her, trepidation
on her face.
“Mio,”
Ritsu whispered again, unseeing, “Kiss me again.” 'This can't
be happening,' The brown haired girl thought to herself as Mio closed
in again, red on her cheeks vibrant. She felt Mio's lips move
against hers slowly, haltingly, before retreating once again. Warmth
bloomed on her face, she grabbed the bassist's hands in her own, entwining
their fingers together.
Mio looked down at their hands,
a fresh trail of tears on her face, her voice tremulous, “Ritsu, please
don't hate me. Because...I love you, so much.”
“Mio?”
Ritsu requested one more thing, her voice quiet, disbelief obvious,
“Hit me, please.”
-x-x-x-
Mugi smiled blissfully, her stomach
full with the wonderful meal Sawako prepared. After eating she insisted
on cleaning up while the teacher applied the ice pack to her hand. Sawako
protested she didn't need it but younger woman gave her another determined
gaze. Stepping closer she bent over and pressed her lips to the teacher's
effectively shutting her up. Sawako parted her lips and nipped Mugi's
bottom lip. She could feel the smile of the younger woman against her
mouth. She reached up and pulled her former student into her lap, their
lips still connected. Their arms wound around each other, Mugi's around
Sawako's shoulders, the older woman's around Mugi's waist.
Mugi pulled away, “Sensei, I
have to clean up.” But the smile on her face implied she really
didn't mind kissing. In fact she'd love to do it again. It was a game
now, playfully finding ways to get closer to each other.
The teacher grinned lazily, her
glasses glinting. “Leave it.” Her brow furrowed as she thought of
something. Mugi wanted to use her fingers to smooth out the creases.
'There's no one to stop me, why not?', she thought to herself.
She did just that, her fingers gently gliding over Sawako's brows. “Don't
be so serious, Sawako-sensei.” Sawako smiled at the action but spoke
what was on her mind. “Mugi-chan, could you just call me Sawako?”
She gently reminded the girl, “There's no need to call me Sensei now.”
“I
will try, but I can't make any promises. I've been calling you Sensei
for so long, it will be a hard habit to break.” Mugi admitted. “More
importantly, we seemed to have gotten into a fix here.” She wiggled
in the woman's lap as if to illustrate a point. Sawako planted a quick
kiss on Mugi's forehead.
“There!”
She exclaimed to the girl, “That should do it.” Mugi pouted, pretending
to be disappointed. Sawako placed a finger on her cheek as if
thinking of solutions for a weighty problem.
“Oh!”
With a 'eureka!' expression on her face she gave Mugi a peck on the
lips.
The girl shook her head gravely.
“I'm afraid that won't take care of the problem, Sensei.”
“Hmmm...”Sawako
went back to 'thinking'.
Mugi squirmed, her proximity to
Sawako doing dangerous things to her libido. A familiar ache flared
up in her midsection as Sawako kissed one corner of her mouth, then
another. She placed another kiss on the tip of Mugi's nose, one her
chin and finally her lips. Mugi pressed against her, impatience
driving her. Gently biting the teacher's upper lip, she swiped her tongue
across it before diving into the woman's open mouth. All she could feel
and think about was Sawako, wanting to get closer. Her hands were buried
in the teacher's hair, while Sawako's hands trailed up and down Mugi's
back. They pulled apart, gasping for air. Mugi leaned forward
on Sawako, causing them both to fall back onto the floor.
Conveniently enough, they landed
in a position where one of Sawako's thighs pressed against the juncture
of Mugi's legs. Mugi gasped as she felt the pressure against her, while
Sawako wore a smirk that set the young woman's heart beating at an incredibly
fast pace. Looking down at the teacher, their bodies intimately tangled
with each other, an intense heat built up in Mugi. She didn't smile,
this time she dove straight for the woman's lips. Aroused as she was
there was one thing she had to say, she needed to say it before they
went any further.
She broke the kiss and rested
her head on Sawako's shoulder, the pale gold strands of her hair joined
the autumn colored tresses of the teacher. They stayed that way a moment,
thinking the other could probably hear the sound of their racing hearts.
“Sawako...”
“Tsumugi...”
They spoke at the same time again,
and laughed when they realized it.
“You
first.” Sawako prompted this time.
“I
love you, Sawako-sensei.” Her azure eyes gazed into Sawako's as she
murmered the words. The older woman's cheeks were pink, her lips curving
into a loving smile. She brushed Mugi's hair away from her eyes gently.
“I
love you too, Mugi-chan.” She indicated the younger girl to get up
and stood up as well. She then took Mugi by the hand and led her to
the bedroom where she proceeded to show the girl exactly how much she
cared.
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