All With Good Intentions (part 5 of 11)
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The Heart’s Open Door
The sounds of someone moving in the room woke Natsuki before anything else did. Touro’s heavy-handed movements as she went about her cleaning routine were a none-too-subtle hint that she had possibly slept for too long. Rays of morning sunlight assaulted the lids of Natsuki’s eyes, driving themselves into her brain like nails in a coffin. She was pretty sure that some island somewhere was missing its beach and that it had taken up residence in her mouth. Her lips and tongue felt like weighted sandpaper. Groans of abject misery rumbled in her chest. Making up drinking games had been a very bad idea, of that she was now quite sure. Never again, she swore. Never EVER again. Gingerly opening one bloodshot green eye, she noticed that the side of the bed Shizuru had once occupied was now empty.
Natsuki lay immobile on her side for some time, letting the tingling after effects of the previous evening dance on her skin a while more. She watched Touro zigzag through the room, straightening the furniture, opening the window, doing all of the things she supposed a servant must do. For the first time, Natsuki noticed that Touro was actually rather good looking. Shoulder-length dark hair flowed around her neck, a striking contrast to her pale as milk skin; her eyes were so light as to almost have no color and her facial features were delicate like a china doll’s. She was sure that Touro knew that she was being watched and chose to let her silence convey her displeasure over last night’s events.
Unable to remain silent any longer, Touro cleared her throat to speak. “Kuga-san,” she said stiffly. “Miss has taken the liberty of aquiring the family jet to fly you back to school. The driver will be here to pick you up in two hours.” Natsuki could feel disapproval and annoyance coming from the servant in waves.
“Fine,” she sighed in resignation.
“Miss left a note for you as well.” Touro laid a small blue envelope on the pillow next to Natsuki. The bright blue stood in stark contrast to the pristine white of the pillowcase like the outer shell of a robin’s egg.
When Touro made no move to leave, the dark-haired girl gave her an aggravated look. “A little privacy, if you don’t mind.”
The young woman huffed in indignation, gave her employer’s guest an equally stern glare and left the room.
She was tempted to go back to sleep for another hour or so, but she kept seeing that damned blue envelope behind her eyelids, taunting her. Last evening had been…what? Exciting? Revealing? She searched her fading memory for details but found that the potent sake had only left her with a throbbing head and rolling stomach. I hope that I didn’t do anything foolish. An involuntary shiver spread liquid warmth throughout her body. Her skin remembered the soft pressure of being held close, warm breath on her ear, the security of strong arms. Natsuki allowed herself a small smile. She felt privileged to be so loved, yet it frightened her all the same.
After several long moments, curiosity finally got the best of her. Taking the letter from the pillow, she got out of bed and sat in one of the overstuffed chairs by the window. She took a deep, steadying breath, then opened the envelope. The kana written in Shizuru’s flowing hand leapt out to her from the page.
Natsuki,
It’s been quite a while since I’ve had so much fun! You’re always a pleasure…especially when you’re drunk. I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to see you off. I had class early this morning. It was good to just talk and let everything out that I’ve been holding in for so long. Your friendship is very important to me; but I think you’ve always known that. I’ll probably be busy with classes for the next few weeks but we’ll see each other again soon, I promise.
Be well,
Shizuru
P.S. No, nothing happened but please try to improve your sleeping habits. You kicked me out of bed twice during the night and took all of the covers!
P.P.S. Just kidding. You slept beautifully.
She felt her cheeks burn with a slight blush. Leave it to Shizuru to find a way to give her a hard time without trying.
“I do hope that you care for Miss as much as she cares for you.”
Natsuki started in surprise. She was so intent on reading the letter, she hadn’t even noticed that Touro had re-entered the room. Cocking an amused eyebrow, she asked, “Why are you concerned about my feelings for Shizuru?”
Shizuru’s servant stepped into the room to place towels, a spare toothbrush and a plush bathrobe on the nightstand beside the bed for her mistress’s guest. “Because Miss is destined for great things and you are a distraction that could be her undoing,” she remarked in a brittle voice.
“What does that mean?” Natsuki growled, her eyes narrowed into her signature glare.
Touro gave a noncommittal shrug. “Fujino-sama has been groomed from an early age to take her father’s place as head of the Fujino family business once he becomes too incapacitated to perform his duties. Her time as student council president at Fuka Gakuen was merely a test of her abilities and skill. She had already been acting as secondary financial consultant for her father by her second academic year. Why do you think Kazahana-sama had complete confidence in her? She knew that Miss was quite capable of handling the business matters of the school.”
She paused in the act of changing the sheets on the king-sized guest bed. When she spoke again, her voice was quiet and reflective.
“I’ve served Fujino-sama ever since we were children. I’ve watched her grow into the beautiful woman you see today. In all of that time, I never once had the courage to tell her how I felt, to let her know my heart.”
The young woman finished her task and sat on the edge of the bed. Silent tears glistened on her face in the gentle glow of sunlight that filtered through the bamboo blinds.
“You see, I knew,” she continued. “I knew that she required another like herself…someone strong, loyal and kind. While I could give her some of those things, I knew that I was a mere servant. I could never be her equal.”
Touro opened her eyes and turned her intense gaze on Natsuki. “If one is to be her partner in life, they must be her partner in all things. Make no mistake, Miss is far stronger than she looks.”
Memories of Shizuru dismantling Yukino’s CHILD, Diana and a fierce encounter with her flickered briefly through Natsuki’s mind. She knew quite well the magnitude of her closest friend’s strength and determination. She considered the seriousness of the young servant’s words. Her mind was such a riot of conflicting emotions that she almost didn’t notice when Touro began speaking again.
“I knew something was wrong with her but she never said a word. All of the time in her self-imposed solitude, she remained strong; only her eyes showed the depth of her pain.”
Natsuki sat down heavily in a nearby chair as Touro paused to open one of the windows a bit further, letting in another blast of warm air. Anger flashed in her light-coloured eyes only to be replaced by bitterness a moment later.
“But when you came last evening, I knew then that she would accept no one but you to share her life. Many will try to capture her heart but they will fail. I am as sure of this as I am sure that the sun will rise tomorrow.”
“Don’t you think I know that?” Natsuki flared in sudden anger. “I do love her! That will never change. I just can not love her the way she wants. I’m just not capable of that.”
“That is a lie and you know it,” Touro hissed. “I’ve seen the way you look at her. One’s eyes always tell the truth. Your mouth speaks cowardly words and gives you an excuse to take advantage of Miss’s loving heart.”
Natsuki jumped up, her hands flexing in rage. “How dare you judge me?”
“You make it so easy. You’re too willing to reap the benefits of Miss’s love without investing any of your own heart. You’ve made sure that the only one who gets hurt is Fujino-sama. Those pathetic excuses are pure selfishness. So don’t lecture me about being judgmental.”
The air between them was charged with animosity. Had anyone walked into the room at that moment, they would’ve sworn that the two would’ve come to blows.
The dark-haired woman stepped closer to Touro until they saw eye to eye. “It is not as simple as all that,” she said in a softer tone. “Nothing ever is. You only know one half so that does not give you the right to judge the whole.” She turned on her heel, gathered up the items on the nightstand and made to go to the bath when a hand on her arm held her fast.
“It would not be wise to break Miss’s heart a second time,” she said with a hint of edge in her voice.
“Is that a threat?” Natsuki bristled.
“No, merely a suggestion.” Touro made to leave the room, pausing at the doorway to give a curt bow to Natsuki. “The driver will be here within the hour to take you to the airport. Gokigenyou, Kuga-san.” She turned and left, closing the door quietly behind her.
Onwards to Part 6
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