Embraceable You Soi heaved a sigh as she turned her final in, feeling no better about her essay section regardless of the fact that she'd triple-checked spelling and facts. Most of her classmates had already left for the day, making her feel a little more self-conscious about how successful she'd been, but after a while the freshman sighed, expelling her anxiety as she tried to prepare herself for a whole day of freedom that would normally be reserved for school. She heard a few stragglers that she passed by talking about summer break already, their plans to work or take a family trip or else fretting about the next set of tests tomorrow. As she stood at her locker putting books away, she caught a hint of dark hair and recently-smoked cigarettes, and gave a smile upon turning to find the Shiba girl hovering over her. "Kuukaku! How are you?" "Can't complain, I guess," Kuukaku lied, still deciding whether or not she wanted to go ahead with this. She hated Yoruichi for putting her in this position, but if it ended up making Soi happy then it was probably for the best. "Hey, Yoruichi wanted to know if you could come over on Friday." It took Soi a moment to process the request; she hadn't seen Yoruichi since they'd 'met' on the stairs a while back, not even in the company of Urahara. To be honest, it was easier for her to deal with things that way, when Yoruichi was out of sight and out of mind, and though she'd never really strayed from her thoughts altogether it had helped her to keep up her mask. Soi hoped that she didn't sound...emotional... when she replied. "Wh-what does she want me for?" "She wouldn't tell me," Kuukaku answered, deciding only to tell the girl a half-truth. "Go see her on Friday. She said it was important." "...Why couldn't she tell me herself?" the freshman queried, a bit put off at being treated as though she wasn't worthy of being spoken to directly. "She's busy helping Kisuke move his stuff into her house. Not like THAT," Kuukaku corrected as she caught the suspicious look on Soi's face at the statement. "...He's just going to stay there while she's away. You know, keep the house safe." "...Oh." "Actually," the older girl whispered, leaning in towards her, "...I heard that things aren't working out between them." "Wh...What do you mean by--" "Later," Kuukaku said with a wave as she walked off, Soi wondering just what she'd been implying in that statement. But she shook her head, cursing herself for allowing to get even a little optimistic. She couldn't help wondering what Yoruichi could want to talk to her about, and though she had a rather hopeful idea she brushed it away with a sad sort of laugh, certain that it would never happen. ---------- "Well, it looks like you've got a couple days," Kuukaku muttered as she walked alongside the dark-skinned senior, her relatively empty bookcase swinging freely back and forth in the slight wind. Yoruichi nodded, deep in thought until her friend spoke again. "...I don't get why you're not just going up to the kid yourself. She DESERVES to know after the way you treated her." "You think I don't know that?" Yoruichi grumbled, her eyes flitting around to the sidewalk and at the perfect rows of houses they passed. As much as it had been difficult to ignore her feelings before, it was almost unbearable now that she understood what was going on in her own head, that her affection for Soi wasn't something she needed or even should be hiding. But she had to do this right, had to think about what she would say, if she should gradually bring this up in a way that would make Soi comfortable. She'd already started going over scenarios in her head, ways to catch Soi off guard, maybe get her to reveal that she still cared about her instead of all the weight being put on her. It didn't help that time was running out-- her plane was leaving early Tuesday, the day after graduation. To be honest, part of her was still wanting to keep this a secret, hoping it would fade eventually when she left. But she had been evasive too long. She needed to tell her the truth, if only so Soi would know that her feelings weren't wasted. ---------- There was a knock on her door a few hours after classes, and finals, had ended on the day before the weekend. Yoruichi took a breath, steeling herself for what she knew was coming, then let it out as she allowed Soi entrance. She'd almost forgotten that ache in the pit of her stomach until she'd come face-to-face with Soi again, but fortunately she recovered before the freshman even noticed. "Hi, Yoruichi-san!" The older of the two smiled back, not showing the slight sting at being called by that formal title again. "Um... Kuukaku said you needed to see me?" "Oh... yeah. Soi, I just..." Yoruichi tried to remain calm but all the plans and strategies she'd thought up on how to deal with this flew out the window, leaving her like an explorer without a compass. All she was aware of was how badly she wanted to hold the girl in front of her, the gnawing want in her chest as her heartstrings twinged. She wasn't ready to go into this now-- she felt too disoriented after seeing Soi again to put her thoughts together. "...I was wondering if you could help me move some things up to the attic? I'm afraid Kisuke won't have much use for them anyway." Soi felt a little annoyed now-- that after all this Yoruichi would call her just as cheap labor-- but since she was already here, and since she had something for Yoruichi anyway, she nodded and followed as the older girl lead the way to the living room. Though she now had a few more hours to think, Yoruichi felt even more stifled by the utter silence that filled the house now. Soi was almost treating her like a stranger, not speaking unless it was to ask where a box would be best suited or offering a hand when she was carrying a rather awkward-looking chest of drawers. She felt Soi's hand brush hers and the electric shock that followed, its newfound potency over her equalled only by its seeming lack of effect on the freshman. "Man, that was heavy!" Soi groaned as they sat in the kitchen, drinking from a small store-bought carton of lemonade, Yoruichi ignoring the milk for once to do the same. "I thought you weren't the type to keep useless crap around the house, Yoruichi-san." "Well... most of it belonged to my parents. I just never bothered to move it before now." Soi nodded, and the kitchen again became still. It was hard to believe that the space of the table between them was only a few feet; to Yoruichi it may as well have been a mile for all her hesitance. This small talk-- trying to pretend that she was just trying to keep things friendly between her and Soi-- was killing her. She wanted to reach across and touch her, wanted to hold Soi in her arms and never let go again, to feel the warmth of that small frame pressed against her own. It struck her suddenly how cruel this must have been on Soi, suffering alone with her presumedly unrequited feelings long before they'd come to this. "Yoruichi-san, could I ask you something?" Soi asked out of the blue. "Huh? Oh, sure..." "...Is it true that you and Urahara-san are having...problems?" The freshman winced once the question had escaped her lips, aware that it was a rather personal inquiry just as she was baffled by WHY she would have asked in the first place. "...Actually... we broke up last week." Soi felt a strange thrill run through her at the news, instantly hating herself for such a feeling of ecstacy. Did Yoruichi still have that much of a hold on her that she believed... No. Not anymore. She had been a fool, and Yoruichi had thrown him away just like her. A Goddess couldn't love, she thought darkly. They only had servants. Toys. "Oh. ...I'm sorry it didn't work out." "No. It wasn't really right for either of us. I had..." Yoruichi glanced directly at her before trailing off, the Chinese girl feeling a spark at the look; it made her wonder just what Yoruichi 'had' that would have made her break up with Kisuke so suddenly. She ignored the small flame of hope that stubbornly kept flaring up inside her. "Um... is there anything else we left in the other room?" Soi spoke up, eager to change the subject. "No, it's okay-- it's mostly smaller boxes. I can get them myself." "Hey, didn't you want to talk to me about something?" Yoruichi paused, glanced into her glass, pretending that she was avoiding Soi's questioning gaze to take interest in the half-melted ice cubes floating in her drink. "Oh, uh... It's funny, I forgot." She gave a little chuckle as if it had been no big deal, which she was grateful Soi bought, heading for the door. As she slipped on her shoes Soi made a little gasp of recollection, then began searching through her bookcase until she found a sealed envelope. "Ah, I almost spaced it-- Yoruichi-san, this is for you. I figured it was better to give it to you now then to forget later." The upperclassman stared at the nondescript envelope, hesitant to take it at first. Had she done something recently that warranted a gift, especially one from Soi? "Um... what is it?" "Well, a few things," Soi admitted with an embarrassed smile, unaware that she'd just made Yoruichi's pulse race a little faster. "...Sort of a 'graduation/going away/thank you' present. It's just... my gratitude for you looking out for me this year." Yoruichi glanced at the gift, unsure of what to say or if she should refuse it, when she looked up to find Soi already waving goodbye from beyond the doorway. ---------- She wasn't sure why she waited-- perhaps it was the creeping dread that by opening it she was saying goodbye to the freshman forever-- but an hour later Yoruichi finally tore a hole along the top, pulling out a store-bought card and a smaller square of folded paper, bulging slightly at its center and surprisingly heavy. Setting the square aside for the time being she read the front of the card. She wasn't sure what she'd been expecting, but a mass-produced message of 'congratulations' hadn't been it; it was almost as depressing as the handful of American 20 dollar bills inside. Had she come to mean so little to Soi now that she could give such a... meaningless thing to her? She had no need of money, but at least it might pay for a meal out or at the movies between her classes once she reached the U.S. It didn't mean anything, but what could she expect? She had no right to deny that something so superficial suited her. Any hopes that the smaller package would make her feel better were instantly obliterated the second she unfolded the paper and saw a flash of ruby and silver land on the table with a clink. The necklace, the one she'd given Soi to replace the destroyed one of her mother's. It felt like a shot directly through her heart, so much so that she didn't notice at first that on the paper was written a note, in Soi's tiny and meticulous writing. Yoruichi-san, I know this may seem strange, but I wanted to return this to you before you left. I appreciate the gesture, but the truth is that my mother's is gone. It was silly of me to keep it so long, like I could somehow keep her alive while I wore it. But I think now I can let it go, let her find peace so that she won't always be worrying about me. I'm sure that this cost you a small fortune, so please don't hesitate to get it sold once you reach America. I'm sure that you could use the cash-- things are pretty expensive from what I've heard. Please take care of yourself. -Soi Yoruichi read the note again and then a third time, unaware of how violently her hands were shaking, how deeply those words shook the very core of her. It had never been to replace Soi's mother, Yoruichi realized. It had just been for her, because she'd looked so happy when she'd seen it again, because it looked so beautiful hanging from her neck, because deep down she'd known she'd gladly spend every last Yen she had if it made Soi smile. Without another thought she grabbed the necklace and ran for the door. ---------- "I'm coming, I'm coming," the freshman insisted as she set the dishes from her microwaved dinner in the sink. She wished her father wasn't working late again tonight-- he knew how to deal with late-afternoon salesman better than she did. "I wish you people would just leave us alo--" Yoruichi was on the front step, barely an inch from her, shoulders heaving as she struggled to breath after clearly having run the whole way. For a while she just stood there, trying to slow the pounding of her heart even after she'd lessened her huffing and puffing. "Yoruichi-san, are you all right?" No. She'd NEVER been all right-- just believed that it was normal to go through life, feeling only the slightest and most obligatory of emotions. But never this-- this flood that overwhelmed her, threatened to sweep her under and drown her as she held the necklace in her hand tighter, like a life preserver. But it wouldn't hold her forever, didn't offer any real shelter. "Um... I can get you some water and we can talk if there's something bothering you..." She'd been so afraid of this-- of surrendering that last inch of herself completely to these feelings-- that it seemed so pointless now to fight it, to even pretend that there was a wall protecting her that Soi hadn't already shattered. Soi was getting worried, confused by the look in Yoruichi's eyes... so vulnerable, so passionate and almost helpless that for a minute it didn't seem like her at all. "Please... tell me what's wrong." With that, Yoruichi let the flood take her away. The freshman tried to speak again only to find herself crushed against Yoruichi, a shocked gasp escaping her lips as strong cocoa arms wrapped around her, holding her so tightly that she feared she couldn't breathe. Soi tried to think, to process this sudden change in behavior but only felt the older girl's gasping chest on her own, a cheek pressed hard against her hair. Yoruichi shuddered in spite of herself. She couldn't believe that she'd denied herself this warmth, this utter euphoria for so long. She let her fingertips become reacquainted with Soi, the desire to melt into her and never be seperate again taking precedence over everything else in her mind. "Y-Yoruichi--" "I love you." Soi felt the world stop turning at that moment, her heart pause completely. The senior realized what she had said but felt no shame, the words she'd been holding back so long now tumbling out with glorious abandon. She ran a hand through Soi's short hair, savoring the silken texture against her hand. Finally Soi's shock became too much, and speech escaped her lips. "...What?" Yoruichi wanted only to repeat it now, to shout it to the world, to herself, to the stars themselves that she worshipped this girl, a girl who no one else could see the way she did. But this time, she decided to only speak loud enough for Soi to hear. "...I love you, Soi."
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