I park my dark green blazer at the end of the Outers’ winding drive. I figure that Setsuna would be less likely to open the door if she saw my car from one of the windows. So I’m leaving it down here. I slowly make my way towards the massive house. The cool night air ruffles my bangs as the wind blows lightly across my path. Glancing at the sky I send a silent prayer towards my guardian planet. Please let her hear me out. Faster than I thought I would, I reach the front door. I raise my hand to knock and then lower it. Can I do this? Will she even listen to me? What if she does and then tells me no? I don’t think I could take a flat out rejection. I’ve had too many of those already, and they weren’t even from people that meant half of what she means to me. I ball my hands into fists. Enough of this. I’ll never know unless I ask her, and I can’t ask her until I get her to talk to me, which means I have to knock on the door. Once again I raise my hand and this time I knock. It takes a few moments but I soon hear soft footsteps approaching the door. I whisper one more prayer and steady myself. She opens the door and then just stands there like she’s been expecting me. Well, she probably was. Time is her specialty after all. I motion towards the door. "Can I come in?" She nods in response and steps aside so that I can enter. After she closes the door she leads me into the study. I sit down on one of the room’s large couches. She remains standing by the door. "Would you like some tea?" She asks, her voice flat. "No, I’m fine." I take a deep breath. Here goes. "Listen, Setsuna, we need to talk." She looks at the floor. "I suppose we do." "Why have you been avoiding me?" "You know the answer to that." I raise an eyebrow at that answer. "No, I don’t. All I know is that you used to love me, at least a part of me, and now you won’t even look at me anymore." "How can I?’ "It’s fairly simple Setsuna, you look up, open your eyes, and then point them in my general direction. Or is it that I’m not good enough for you?" She looks up at that statement. "What?" "I get it, things were fine when I was a princess but now that I’m just a solider I’m not good enough for the great Sailor Pluto." She shakes her head. "That’s not it at all. Princess or pauper it doesn’t matter to me." "Then what is it then?" She closes her eyes and sighs. "How can I look at you when I don’t know if you actually feel the way you say you do?" "Huh?" Now I’m confused. "Do you truly love me, or is this just what you see as a proper reaction to the dreams? Are you doing this out of pity?" She opens her eyes and turns toward me. "If that’s the case then save it. I’ve been alone for quite some time and I can manage quite well." I rise from my seat. "No, I don’t" She bows her head. "I thought so…" "I don’t pity you. And I’m not doing this just because of the dreams. Yeah, the memories awoke these feelings in me, but they were already there." "How can you be sure?" I walk over to her and grab her arm. Her eyes widen but she doesn’t pull away. "I love you damn it. I don’t know how else to say it." She shakes her head. I’m running out of options here. Time for something drastic. I take my free hand and gently tip her face up. "I love you." I whisper just before I claim her lips. It takes a moment but then she begins to kiss me back. I let go of her arm and wrap my arms around her waist drawing her closer. Her arms wind their way around my neck. It’s much better in real life that it is in memory. Far too soon for my tastes, however, we separate. Her crimson eyes are swimming with tears that she’s struggling to hold at bay. "I want to believe you, gods I do. I just don’t know." She whispers as a treacherous tear slides down her face. I sigh. I almost had her for a minute there. I take her face in my hands and brush the tear away with my thumb. "I’ve done all I can. It’s up to you now. You know where I’ll be when you find your answer." I allow myself one last whisper of a kiss and then I let her go. "I do love you Setsuna, all you need to do to see it is open your eyes…"
Back to Memories Index - Back to Sailor Moon Shoujo-Ai Fanfiction