---Omake Eleven: The Marx Sisters--- On the second story of a corner high-rise, the door to Dr. Chiba Mamoru's office burst open as a woman with long black hair came in wearing a black jacket with tails. She was bent over slightly when she walked, and sported a fake mustache drawn on with black grease paint. Following her was a young woman with short sandy blond hair wearing a ridiculous looking hat that came to a point, and a plain black jacket. A third member of the group soon joined them; a blond with a goofy grin wearing a beat-up top hat and an oversized rain coat that reached down to her ankles. In her hand she held a cane with a bicycle horn at the top of it. The sandy blond turned to the raven haired woman with the fake mustache. "Heya boss," she began, "I canna unnastands you inna da role of Groucho, an' Mina there as Harpo, but why do I gotta da be Chico?" "Because you play the piano and you're the best at faking an Italian accent." Rei quipped. She looked over at Minako, "Hey Mina, what are you up to over there?" Mina's face lit up as she reached into her pocked and pulled out a tape measure. She then held onto one end as she let the other end drop to the floor. Haruka went over and looked at the end her fellow blond was still holding onto. "It looksa like she's uppa to five foot four." Ruka said. Rei gave the two a look. "Five-four, eh?" she asked, "Well wait until she gets up to five-five and then sell." At that point the receptionist came out, her luxuriantly wavy aqua hair pulled up loosely into a bun behind her. In spite of her nurse's uniform, she had a certain air of refined elegance about her. "Hino Rei-san?" she announced, "The doctor will see you n..." "Helloooooooo nurse!" Ruka called out as she and Mina raced over. Rei smirked as she walked by. "What do you two think you're doing?" the nurse asked incredulously as the two surrounded her. "From the looks of it, tag teaming." Rei quipped. "Only one of you in the ring at a time; the other waits over by the magazine rack until tagged in or I come back, whichever comes first." With that, she left the hapless receptionist and showed herself through the door. Walking down the corridor, Rei came up to a door with a sign reading "Chiba Mamoru, Dr." She turned to the audience, raising her eyebrows with a malicious smile teasing her lips, and then turned back to the door and went in. She noticed when she shut the door that there was a window opened out to the street on the wall adjacent. A man in a white uniform turned around and smiled pleasantly. "Hello," he said, "May I help you?" "I'm here to see the doctor." "Are you sick?" "Are you the doctor?" "Yes, I'm the doctor." "Then I think I'm going to be sick." she answered. ------ "What exactly is the matter with your friend?" the receptionist asked. "Ah, don'ta worry about her. She'sa not all there inna da head. Hey Mina, be nice and shakea da nice lady's hand." The receptionist rather reluctantly reached out to shake hands with Mina. HONK! The receptionist jumped as Mina handed her the honker on her horn instead of her hand. "Hey, what'sa matta for you?" Ruka said angrily, "Don't you knowa how to treata da lady?" Mina smiled goofily as she nodded her head. She then proceeded to lift her right leg and put it in the receptionist's left hand. "What th..." the aqua-haired beauty stuttered out as she swatted Mina's leg away. "Hey I'mma da sorry about Mina here. She getsa that way arounda da cute girls." The receptionist blushed in spite of herself. "Thank you." she said. "You know," she began rather hesitantly, "I think you're kind of cute yourself. My name's nurse Kaioh Michiru." "Wella Michiru, I..." Ruka stopped when she realized she was now holding onto Mina's leg herself, "Geta outta here!" she said angrily as she swatted her fellow blonde's leg away. ------ Dr. Chiba frowned, "Exactly what did you want to see me about, young lady?" "I don't know, I'm guessing about half an hour." Rei answered. "You see doc, my new job requires me to take a physical, and the HMO I'm part of gave me only three choices in doctors; Dr. Who, Dr. Seus, and you. And unfortunately I ended up with you." "Well, I... Wait a minute." Mamoru said suspiciously, "Since when has Japan offered HMOs?" "Tell ya what doc; you don't ask about Japanese HMOs, and I won't ask about where everyone's henshin sticks are kept when not in use." Before Dr. Chiba could respond, a nurse came in with a medical report. She had long blond hair pulled up into odangos, and as she walked in the door once again obscured the side window out to the streets below. She handed the report over to the doctor who turned away from her to read its contents. Rei smiled broadly as she caught sight of the beautiful blond. As bland muzac began playing over the intercom, the raven-haired woman stalked over to the nurse. "Excuse me nurse," she said, "But do you rumba?" The blond smiled a bit, "Why yes, I do." "Good, then pick a rumba from one to ten." The nurse gave Rei a puzzled look, not sure what to say. Before she had a chance to form a response, the dark haired young woman took her in her arms and started dancing her around the room. Mamoru turned around at that point, "Usagi-chan... er... Nurse Tsukino!" the doctor yelled, "What do you think you're doing?" "At the moment she's dancing." Rei quipped. Dr. Chiba grew angry. "Look here!" he snarled, "I'm not about to stand here and watch you romance my fiancée!" "No problem; turn around and we'll do it behind your back." Rei answered. Dr. Chiba stalked over, his face now red with rage as he forcibly separated the two women. "You!" he shouted at nurse Tsukino, "Go get me the files on little Miyuki! And you!" he yelled at Rei as Usagi quickly ran out of the room, shutting the door behind her and once again exposing the open window to the room, "Get up on that examination table NOW!" As Rei complied, Mamoru grabbed a stethoscope off the counter and came towards her. "Now then," he snarled exasperatedly, "I need you to take your clothes off and..." "What?" Rei asked in shock, "No first date? No flowers? No candy? No prenup? No..." "For the examination!" Dr. Chiba yelled out, "I need you to... What the...?" a sound coming from outside attracted the doctor's attention. Going to the window, he looked out to see a group of men hooking up the front of his vehicle to a tow truck, which then began lifting the front end. "No!" the doctor shouted. Rei came over. "Say doc, what seems to be the problem?" "Some idiot in a red car rear ended my vehicle, pushing it so that it ended up next to a fire hydrant. They're towing my car!" "A red car you say?" Rei asked, "It wouldn't happen to be a Toyota, would it?" "Yes, it is, I... How did you know that?" Mamoru asked angrily. "Oh, I don't know." The raven haired woman answered, "Just a lucky guess." she said as she slowly walked away while whistling. A large vein popped out of Mamoru's head, "Why you dirty..." Before he could finish however, nurse Tsukino burst back in with the file he wanted. Unfortunately, the door knocked into Mamoru, pushing him out the window. "AAAAAAAA!" Usagi looked horrified, "What happened?" she cried, "My god, what just happened?" "From the looks of things, a perfectly executed swan dive." Rei answered. ------ "Oh, so dat'sa it, eh?" Ruka asked angrily, "Trying ta ruina my chances wit da nurse, huh?" Mina's response to Ruka's accusation was to reach into the pocket of her raincoat and pull out a pair of scissors. She grabbed Ruka's tie, and before the sandy blond could stop her she cut the tie in half. "Stop it you two!" the razzled nurse Kaioh ordered to no avail. "Dat'sa it!" Ruka shouted as both she and Mina took fighting stances. Ruka swung out wildly with her right fist. Mina ducked the blow, coming around with a side kick to Ruka's rear end. Before the fight could go any further, Usagi burst into the waiting room from the back. "Nurse Tsukino?" Michiru asked, "What..." "It's Mamo-chan... er... Dr. Chiba! He fell out the window!" "What?" Michiru asked in shock. Usagi ran across the room to the door with Rei following close behind her, obviously more concerned about the view she was getting of the nurse's backside than any of the doctor's possible injuries. Michiru ran after the two of them, and Ruka ran after Michiru. Before Ruka could reach the door however, Mina jumped onto her back, using her cane like a rider's crop as she spurred the tomboy forward. They ran down the stairs and out side the building to Dr. Chiba's body as fast as they could. Unfortunately, the steamroller got to him first. Rei looked at her wristwatch as she grabbed what was left of Mamoru's wrist, "Well," she pronounced, "Either he's dead or my watch has stopped." Usagi started to cry, "No!" she wept, "Isn't there any hope?" Rei looked up at her, "Wouldn't happen to have a lobster tank and a microphone handy would you?" "What?" the nurse asked, "Well no, but..." "Then I'm afraid there's no hope." Usagi began to cry uncontrollably at that. Rei put a hand on her shoulder. "Don't cry." she said, "Tell you what, how would you like to go out to dinner?" "Mamo-chan. My Mamo... food?" Usagi asked, her face brightening. Rei smiled as she took her arm. "Come with me, babe." she said, "I know a place that serves great duck soup." "Heya boss," Ruka said as she took Michiru's hand, "We'rea commin' too. Well makea it da doublea date." As the four women headed for Rei's red Toyota, Mina reached into her coat pockets with both hands, pulling out handfuls of rose petals to throw at the two couples. ---To Be Continued--- End Notes: Dedicated to EfrainMan for the defenestration idea, and my friend Adam for suggesting the car being towed as a reason Mamoru would look out the window.
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