Progress. That was what she was making: progress. Rei was finally opening up and it had taken a lot less than Asuka would have ever expected.
Or at least that was how it had seemed that morning. By lunch time however, Rei was back to her usual monosyllabic self. Not that Asuka minded especially. She was sure that what had gone on since their reunion wasn't washing over Rei without effect. Little differences were already creeping into her mannerisms. For example, after rising late (it being Sunday and there being no work for Asuka to go to) they discovered the coffee utensils that had been used and not cleared away the night before. Asuka had decided (or rather, her growling stomach had decided) that food was more important, as they each hadn't eaten since breakfast on the previous day. For some reason, eating had completely slipped her mind...
Rei had then offered to clear up while Asuka prepared the food. That was the first minor difference, but also the way she had offered wasn't normal Rei. Where she would normally ask for mere confirmation of her duties, i.e. "should I clear this up?" she had instead sought an emotional response from Asuka: "would you like me to clear this up?" A small thing, maybe, but something that Asuka picked up on, nevertheless.
Of course, she remained completely silent whilst completing the task, but that wasn't anything Asuka hadn't already become accustomed to. In fact, in a way it was quite comforting...
The young redhead made sandwiches for each of them, since cooking felt a little too involved for the time of day. They ate them, mainly in silence, seated at the kotatsu as they had been the night before. Asuka couldn't help watching Rei as she ate, waves of surreal wonder kept rolling over her. It was almost unbelievable that the blue haired girl was seated before her at all.
How did she come back? wondered the redhead. Did she choose to leave the lcl, like I did?
Thinking back to the Instrumentality was not something she liked to do. Shinji may have allowed the world to continue, but it was Asuka who had chosen to leave the sea of souls. Remembering all the human entities crowded together, touching every part of her psyche, seeing everyone and being seen by everyone, losing the borders of her self... it was an experience the German had found horrifying. Had Rei's experience been the same as hers? Was that why she had come back?
She wanted to ask, but at the same time, she didn't think she had the strength or courage to talk about those things herself. Instead, she remained uncharacteristically quiet, even as she collected up their utensils and returned them to the kitchen, leaving Rei seated meekly at the Kotatsu.
When she passed through the entrance hall once more, Asuka noticed that the light on her answering machine was flashing. It must have been flashing since the previous day, but what with Rei's dramatic arrival, it had totally failed to register. She strode over to the phone and hit 'play message', already knowing who it would be before she depressed the plastic button.
"Asuka?" said the slightly digitalised female voice, "It's Maya..." there was a pause, "I guess you're out. I hope you've not just stopped answering your phone... Anyway, I thought we could meet up tomorrow or some time this week. I haven't seen or heard from you for a few weeks and I'm starting to get a bit worried. If you're bothered by how I was last time, I'm doing better now, I've laid off the alcohol a bit. Are you still touring cafés?"
There was another pause in which Asuka felt chagrin.
"Sorry, I guess I should have told you I know about that. I've seen you on more than one occasion, what with being in the delivery business now. Anyway, give me a call. I really want to see you, to make sure you're all right... You're the only one that's..." a third pause followed, the longest yet, then Maya finished. "Well, call me..."
The line clicked on the recording and then the answer phone informed her that there were no further messages.
"Lieutenant Ibuki..." said a voice from behind her. Asuka jumped and looked round. Rei was standing in the doorway to the living area, her expression unreadable.
"Yeah," replied Asuka, "She's been having a hard time since... well, you know. I think she had a thing for Doctor... for Ritsuko."
She supposed she would probably always remember the people that had died in Nerv by their rank or title. It was something that she would never get past.
"That woman tried to kill me."
"Maya?!" gasped Asuka. Rei shook her head. "Ritsuko..." finished the young German, suddenly understanding. And she thought she had vague recollections of what Rei was talking about, of red liquid and the edges of a white lab coat being tugged at by small currents. Another gift from the mind of Shinji... or was this from Rei herself?
"I made her sad. I made her mother sad... Now I've made Maya sad..."
"Don't say that!" cried Asuka. She lunged forward and grabbed the startled Rei, pulling her into an embrace. "We're all partly responsibility for what happened, it's not just your fault!" she whispered fiercely, tears stinging the backs of her eyes, "Stop blaming yourself for everything, or you'll get me started, too!"
Rei smiled faintly and relaxed into the hug, putting her own arms around Asuka. She rested her cheek on the redhead's shoulder.
"Holding you feels nice," she whispered, "I never –"
Asuka let go of her quickly, leaving Rei looking slightly disappointed.
"It's called hugging," replied the German, breezily. "If you want to know what it is to live, you're going to have to start using correct terms for things like that. Otherwise, you'll start causing all sorts of uncomfortable misunderstandings..."
In truth, though, they hadn't just been hugging. Asuka had let go so quickly because Rei had been right; it had felt nice... Asuka wasn't used to that yet.
Some teacher I'm going to be...
She turned back to the phone.
"Well, I better give her a call, I suppose," she said, picking up the receiver. She glanced at Rei. "I do have big news, after all..."
She punched Maya's number into the handset without pause. It came quickly to her mind; in truth it was one of only a very few telephone numbers Asuka had to remember since coming to Kaibyaku: Maya; the foreman at work; her landlord; a couple of her colleagues that had tried (and mostly failed) to form a friendly relationship with her outside of work... And that was it.
The line buzzed eight times, a long time for Maya. Asuka was just expecting the answering machine to pick up, but then the former lieutenant appeared on the line.
"Hello, sorry, hello!" Maya sounded out of breath, "Sorry, I was in the bathroom."
"Too much information, as usual, lieutenant," said the German.
"Asuka? I wasn't expecting to hear from you!" said Maya, sounding surprised.
"You told me to call," replied Asuka, frowning.
"Ah, that's right," replied Maya, "but since you hadn't spoken to me for ages, I wasn't sure... Well, anyway, are you all right? I've been worried about you, you know? I hope you don't hate me for the café thing, it's just –"
"Maya," Asuka broke in, "it's fine. I'm sorry I've been so closed off recently." She glanced at Rei, who was standing, looking a little awkward, in the kitchen doorway. "Look, Maya, can we meet up today... I have to talk to you about something..."
"Sure..." answered Maya, sounding anything but, "there's nothing wrong, is there?"
"Oh, no. Nothing like that."
"Okay, well, where would you like to meet? That café down on –"
"I think it would be best if we were somewhere private, rather than somewhere with lots of people. How about you come over to mine? I've got some new coffee which is really good."
"You're really worrying me now," said Maya, "this isn't about that time I was drunk and tried to kiss you, is it? I said I was sorry, I thought you'd taken that as –"
"B-Baka!" stammered Asuka, blushing at that memory, "What are you bringing that up for? Maya, would you quit worrying. I said it wasn't anything bad!"
"Okay..." replied Maya, slowly, "You have coffee, you say? Then how about I bring some groceries and cook us dinner?"
"Sounds good," smiled Asuka, "but just one thing: bring lots."
"Okay," replied Maya, sounding more confused than ever.
"See you around seven, say?"
"Sure," said Maya, "see you at seven."
Asuka hung up and heaved a sigh.
"Is Maya coming?" the voice of Rei sounded from across the hallway. Asuka looked up and smiled.
"She said she would. But this place is a mess, I haven't cleaned properly in ages. Want to help me straighten everything up before she gets here?"
Rei considered this for a moment, then nodded.
"I would... like that."
Asuka smiled at her new room-mate, who still stood a little awkwardly, staring back at her with that usual neutral expression. Sudden energy filled her.
"Right!
We've got a little more than five hours before Ibuki will be here, we'd
best get started!"
Back to The End and After - New Beginnings Index - Back to Neon Genesis Evangelion Shoujo-Ai Fanfiction