Asuka led Rei through her small apartment until they reached the bathroom. She ran the taps and the bath began to fill.
"I assume you know how to work something like a bath, Wonder Girl?" she asked. Rei nodded. "Good, then get yourself out of that horrible plug suit and use it. I'll go find you some clothes. If I'm letting you stay here, you need better things to wear than that thing."
"You're letting me stay?" asked Rei.
"Well I'm not chucking you out on the street," replied Asuka. "Your bandages, do you need a hand?"
Rei shook her head.
"They are unnecessary now."
"Good, well, see you in a bit then."
She left the bathroom, which was now rapidly filling with steam, and closed the door behind her. Then she went to her bedroom, opened her drawers and began searching through the clothes she had scraped together for something she thought might be suitable for Rei. She settled for a white shirt and a long dark skirt, with some long socks and pumps. Clothes had lost a lot of their importance to her since Third Impact, but now that she looked through them, she was a little chagrined to find there weren't any in her collection that she really liked the look of.
"Well, these will have to do for now," she said aloud, picking up the bundle and taking them back to the bathroom. Steam was escaping from under the door, to be lost in the cool air of the corridor and there was the faint sounds of splashing water coming from within.
"Rei?" called Asuka.
"Yes," came the reply.
"Are you okay in there?"
"I am fine... I have always liked water."
"I've got some clothes for you," said Asuka, "I'll leave them outside the door."
"Thankyou, pilot Soryuu," replied Rei.
"Right! That's something else that's got to stop," she said in exasperation. "My name is Asuka, not 'Pilot Soryuu'!"
"But we are both Eva pilots..." said Rei, confusion in her voice.
"Is that the only way you define yourself?" asked Asuka, and when she was met with silence: "The Evas are gone, Rei, and thank god! We have nothing to do with them any more. Besides, I always hated the way you called me Pilot Soryuu. Like I was nothing more than that to you."
There was another pause from the bathroom, during which Asuka faintly heard splashing water.
"I didn't know," said Rei, in a voice almost too quiet for her to hear. Asuka suddenly felt very guilty.
"Hey, Rei? I treated you pretty badly back then, didn't I?" No answer. "I've always felt guilty about it since. Perhaps if I'd been nicer to you, things would have turned out differently..."
"They wouldn't have," replied Ayanami.
They both lapsed into silence for a while, Asuka with her own thoughts. Eventually, she stirred.
"Well, I'll leave these things for you here then. Take your time in there."
She was about to leave when a sudden thought struck her, making her pause.
"Rei?" she called through the closed door. There was a moment of silence, then her reply filtered back.
"I am here, Pilot So- Asuka."
"Well, um, its just... Don't think me rude or anything," too late for that, surely, "but I wanted to ask you a... difficult question."
"Go ahead," replied Ayanami.
"Well... which Rei are you? I know now there were lots of you. Did I ever even meet you personally?"
Asuka heard Ayanami inhale deeply before replying.
"I think..." she began, "I think I'm all of the Rei's... and none of them. I'm the Rei you knew and I'm a Rei that could have been." There was another pause, then: "Does that answer your question?"
"Not really..." replied Asuka.
"I am me," said Rei, "that's all that matters."
"Still..." said Asuka, "If you aren't the Rei I used to know –"
"I remember... I remember you. I remember the way you hated me. I remember you calling me a doll. I remember you hitting me."
"Rei, I –"
"I also remember saving you... and wanting to save you. My hand remembers holding longinus. It remembers the weight, the heft. My mind remembers how terrible it felt, even as I used it to save you. I am the Rei you knew."
A great wave of shame and sorrow welled up in her chest. Partly for the way she had treated the Eva pilot, partly for the callousness of her question.
"I'm sorry," said Asuka, then wondered briefly if that was the first time she'd ever used that word with Rei. "I'll leave you now, I didn't mean to upset you."
"You did not," replied Rei. "Please stay. Your presence is... comforting. I have rarely found comfort in another before."
"Fine!" said Asuka, in a short tone of voice. But inside she felt warm at Rei's words. It had been a long time since she had felt needed by anyone.
Asuka sat down with her back to the door and wrapped her hands around her knees.
"What shall we talk about?" she asked. Again she was met by silence. "Why do you always do that? Why do you never answer questions?"
"I was thinking of a suitable response," replied Rei, "I had not found one yet."
"Right, right," said Asuka, "well, how about we talk about what you're going to do now?"
"Okay," said Rei.
"What will you do? I mean, you can stay here, but I'm not supporting you or anything. You'll have to find a job and get some money..."
"What do you do for money?" asked Rei.
"I used to work in construction doing manual labour," replied Asuka. "After Third Impact, everyone had to pull together and do whatever needed doing, even kids like us."
I finally admitted that I'm a kid just then, she thought to herself, and after years and years of trying to be an adult. Well, maybe I accepted that after Third Impact... still, I'm acting more like an adult now than I ever did at Nerv...
"What do you do now?" asked Rei.
"I still work on building sites," she replied, "though now I work with the heavy construction vehicles. I guess the foreman realised how good I was with machines."
So perhaps I am still Pilot Soryuu, after all.
There was quiet on the other side of the door, then Rei spoke again.
"Perhaps I could do the same."
"I doubt the foreman would allow it. We're not taking just anyone any more. Things have got a lot better."
"But you still work there?" queried Rei.
"I'm a special case. They all know me and know I'm capable, even if I am still a kid. Besides, they also know that I really need the job, so they just let me get on with it. But, come on Rei, there must be other stuff you'd like to do? Jobs are hardly scarce at the moment... What do you enjoy doing?"
"I enjoy... swimming."
"Hmmm, then I suppose you could be a swimming instructor, if there's any call for that at the moment... Then again, with your personality, perhaps not. Anything else?"
There was a long pause, a very long pause, but Asuka decided not to pressure her this time. Still, as the silence grew longer and longer, she began to wonder whether the blue haired girl had fallen asleep in the bath.
"Rei?" she finally attempted. There was the sound of splashing water, much louder than before, then feet were padding across her bathroom floor, making the boards creak slightly.
She's getting out of the bath, thought Asuka, maybe she's done.
Suddenly, the door against which she was leaning, opened behind her and Asuka found herself falling backwards. A completely naked and dripping Rei stood above Asuka, looking down at her as she sprawled, amazed, upon the floor.
"I cannot think of anything," said the blue haired girl, and there was a look on her face that Asuka had never seen before; frustration. And worry...
And she was naked.
NAKED.
"B-BAKA!!" cried Asuka, sitting up quickly and turning her gaze towards the floor. "Don't just wander around without any clothes on!"
"The water was going cold," said Rei, as if that was a reason for doing so.
"F-Fine, fine," stammered Asuka, "just put some clothes on. They're right there."
She pointed to the small bundle that lay beside her.
"Thankyou Pil- Asuka."
And out of the corner of her eye, Asuka saw a pale, slender arm appear as Rei bent to pick up the clothes. The arm disappeared from view once more and the door closed again. Asuka found herself breathing a big sigh of relief.
That was a shock, she thought.
"I hope they are warm enough for the season," she said as her heartbeat gradually returned to normal, "I really need to get some proper winter clothes soon, we'll have to go shopping and get you some too."
The door opened again and Asuka stood and turned round. Rei stood before her in the clothes she had been given. They didn't really suit her, but they didn't look terrible either. Asuka also realised that the eye bandage had been removed, revealing her left eye. It was bloodshot and looked sore, heightening the red impression of her gaze all the more.
"Your eye, is it okay?" she asked, and without thinking reached out her hand to touch Rei's cheek. Rei did not move, but her eyes shifted to the hand as it reached towards her. This caused Asuka to realise what she was doing and she dropped it quickly back to her side.
"I-I'm sorry!" she stuttered.
"Why?" asked Rei. Asuka was lost for an answer. In truth, she didn't really know. Everything seemed to have gone a bit crazy since Rei had turned up and Asuka found that she didn't really understand much any more. About Rei, about her past, about herself.
Still, being confused is better than being emotionally dead, a dark part of her mind spoke up, you're making progress at last. And it's all because Wonder Girl turned up again.
"Anyway," said Asuka, blushing and looking away, "those clothes seem to fit you fine."
"Will these clothes help me?" asked Rei, plucking at the sleeve of the shirt.
"Help you what?" said Asuka, frowning.
"Understand why I chose to live," replied Rei.
Asuka opened her mouth. Then she closed it again. Then she thought about opening it again, decided against it as she had nothing to say, and closed her eyes instead. Suddenly she felt light headed, as though she was on the verge of a faint.
What do I say? she thought, desperately, I have no answers for her, but she came all this way. How do I crush her like that?
She tried not to think about how, not all that long ago, she would have been delighted to have been presented a chance to crush Rei.
Well, perhaps not delighted...
"Asuka?" asked Rei, "Are you all right."
"I'm fine," said Asuka, opening her eyes and smiling ruefully, "I'm just not sure I'm the one who can give you the answers you want."
Oh, get a grip, another part of her mind suddenly shouted, one she hadn't heard from in a while, you always despised Shinji for being so pathetic, now you're being pathetic yourself.
She wasn't inclined to listen to that part of her mind just yet, though. It had been the cause of too much pain in the past...
"There is no one else other than you," said Rei, "if you cannot, then no one can."
"Rei..." began Asuka, but again found no more words willing to follow.
"I... need you," said Rei. The distress in her voice was plain. It caused Asuka to wilt.
"I'm just not sure I believe in myself that much anymore," she whispered.
"I believe in you," replied Rei, reaching out her own hand to touch Asuka's cheek, "I always did..."
Asuka couldn't stop a tear slipping from the corner of her eye. She brushed it away savagely.
"Great!" she muttered, "I'm turning into Shinji after all." She looked fiercely at Rei. "Fine, I'll try, but it'll be a slow business. Who knows if you'll ever get an answer? Right now though, it's getting late and I'm feeling more than a little emotionally shattered. You must be too. I suggest we both turn in."
Rei
nodded.
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