A Second Chance
Quietly I slipped away from the group starring off into the horizon
after the departing shooting stars. The battle was finally over.
Galaxia cleansed and Chaos had retreated. Peace once again was
established, once again due to our bright star of hope, our princess.
And yet, I did not feel very much like celebrating. The general mood
had been depressed actually and I believe the Outers had to have
similar feelings.
What the princess didn't know - if Mamoru hadn't told her
yet - was, that our absence hadn't been so smoothly as we had assured
our savior. She wouldn't have understood, wouldn't have been happy to
hear it. The truth of the matter was, being reduced to your Sailor
Crystal left you quite unprotected, all emotional and mental shields
you protected yourself from the outside world with were non-existent.
I could only speak from my own memories but I guess, the others were
not better off.
I had been... aware. That much I'm sure about. I was even
aware of who I was etc., but there was no body, no linking whatsoever
to the world around me. The only thing that defined my existence was
the ocean of star seeds around me and the emotions from the closest
ones around me. No, not only emotions. Memories. Our deepest, best
hidden, darkest memories. Those that defined, shaped our mortal
lives, made us who we were. I had received glimpses from all of them.
Rei's childhood from the time when her mother died and her father
didn't take the responsibility he damn well should have, Ami living
through the worst times before the divorce of her parents. Makoto
upon receiving the news of the plane crash in which her parents
died... That had to be one of the worst. Even memories from the
Outers and Mamoru had been mixed into it. And everything was packed
into a massive onslaught of unyielding dark emotions. It was terrible.
All that though, wasn't the worst. The worst and the clearest
memories and emotions I had received from only one of my fellow
comrades. It had made the rest appear unworthy and hollow compared to
the deep experiences I had received from... her. I had been aware
that her past was probably the worst of all of us, I wouldn't have
needed the memories to confirm that. However, I was unprepared for
the exact nature of her emotional pain. I had never imagined that it
would run THAT deep. People who judged a person from the outside,
from appearance, were dumb, I knew that already, but everyone knowing
her, REALLY knowing her, would instinctively reach out to protect the
girl. Yet, nobody did know her. I doubted that even Pluto did quite
so well as I did now. And as a result, the world just saw what they
wanted. Prejudices were one thing but that, that... I couldn't really
find a word for it.
I headed towards the fountain in one of those countless parks
of Tokyo. I knew she would be here. Don't ask me how, I just did.
My steps were quick and purposeful, definitely not the ones that
should belong to the child I appeared to be for the world around me.
Not the small steps of a little girl who would falter in her straight
course over and over again, to satisfy her curiosity about one thing
or another. No, that was not me. It was just a shell, a mask, a
protection for my soul. It was useless now, becoming useless, to her
at least. I had nothing to hide anymore, didn't need to hide anymore
and couldn't hide anymore. Because she knew already. Everything. The
whole, terrific truth. As much as I knew hers.
She was there as expected, blonde hair swaying in the evening
wind, the last sun beams of the day bathing her in a beautiful
display of shadow and light through the water of the fountain. Blue
eyes searched mine the moment I stepped into sight and I didn't
hesitate to meet the gaze. Sad, compassionate, hesitant, unsure of
what to do now. I walked the remaining distance at a slower pace, not
caring about onlookers while my body began to shift and my form to
grow until it matched hers. She watched intently, transfixed by the
transformation, her eyes lingering on the older body. I think, we
were the same age now.
When we met in front of the fountain, the sounds around us
faded into the background and further away as time passed. Standing
still for an eternity, we remained as we were. Our bodies inches
apart, one of her hands hovering on my arm, my head upwards so that
my eyes could still see hers as she looked down - I was still
slightly shorter but I didn't mind. These blue eyes so full of life
and yet so deeply filled with loneliness. The craving for one who
could fill this special place in her heart, the longing for the end
of the suffering, I all knew what it meant, where it came from. And
it was directed at me right now. Me alone.
Neither of us moved, neither dared to move, as we probably
both recalled the fated moment only hours ago. A moment only for us.
One timeless moment.
---Flashback---
Bright sunlight penetrated my eyes forcing them to blink in
irritation and to close just as quickly. Taking my time, I tried to
readjust to my surroundings, wondering there I was. I felt physically
rooted again but at the same time it was different. Nothing made much
sense and I chose to undergo the simple task of taking in my
surroundings.
I was in a palace of some sorts. The stone was a brilliant
orange-gold color. Wide archways, giant pillars and at the same time
soft-looking as well as massive-appearing statues and sculptures were
gracing the walls. I was outside in a garden, I think. Although the
simple term "garden" bore a hidden note of blasphemy, judged by the
variety of flowers. A bed of roses, lilies, daisies, orchids and
many, many other that I didn't even recognize. Some surely didn't
even bloom on Earth, some might even not in the huge gardens of the
old Moon Kingdom. A huge bird of golden stone sat atop the outside
world, its wings spread wide and it prepared to screech. A truly,
magnificent sight. This place bore memories though I could not tell
which.
My mind was still to jumbled to sort through all the
experiences I had just shared, all the emotions weighing down on my
already heavy soul, all the memories tormenting my strained spirit.
If not for the one, constant one, I don't believe, I could have kept
sane. I had grabbed onto that one experience like a lifeline. Where
had been something I could deeply identify with, sympathize with. I
could understand loneliness, I could share it, that was something I
knew all too well. The other memories were simply distracting.
"Where am I?" I wondered out loud, not really expecting an
answer. I couldn't get the nagging sense out of my mind, that I
should know this place, as if it was... home. Home? Something about
this word warmed me, thinking about it and linking it to the
surrounding, I felt almost content with life right now. I could
happily die now that I was here. "In the atmosphere of Venus. That is
the Magellan Palace."
My head snapped around and I saw HER standing there, leaning
against the wall, directly under the huge bird statue. I expected her
to wear an orange gown, appropriate for the place and time. But there
was none. There was nothing actually. She was nude, only a pair of
golden wings - just like Sailor Moon's - folded around her birthday's
body. With a start, I realized that I wasn't wearing anything either.
Only the comforting blanket of my own ebony black wings.
Hesitant I walked over to her, her eyes following my movement
carefully, not leaving my form for a fleeting moment. Patient and
tranquil, waiting for me to reach her. And when I finally did, when I
joined her under the protective area of the bird, the... Suiwa...
When I did that and our eyes met, blue on purple, everything suddenly
made sense. So much horrible sense.
"Do you remember?" she asked tentatively, softly. I could
only nod. I did remember. Oh, how much I did remember. Everything was
suddenly so clear. As if something had cut the shell away and left
only clarity. The one memory that mattered, the one that answered all
the questions, solved all the problems, made everything as it should
be, the one that hurt oh so much... There were no names, only faces,
actions, lives. But no names, I did not know why that was, why that
was the only thing left undiscovered. Maybe it was for the best. The
memories were enough anyway. Names would just further confuse us,
force us to ask who we were now. We still knew who we were... in this
life... and maybe the one before. And now we knew what we were back
then. Still, without the names, we at least were us now. Just us. Not
me, not her, just us.
"Yeah..." I replied quietly, reaching up to touch her cheek,
playing with my fingers over the soft skin, oh so familiar yet
different. Golden, feathered wings opened and enfolded me without a
word, without a sound. We didn't need sounds, we didn't need anything
for what we were doing. The actions were natural, simple and almost
as old as time itself. Or so it seemed to me. My black wings joined
her golden ones in a cocoon that enfolded us in a protective glow. As
it had been all that time ago. Lifetimes back, then it all started.
Her hands were cupping my face now, staring deep into my
eyes. A mixture of all sorts of emotions swirled into those blue orbs
and for a moment there, I actually believed they briefly flashed
golden. I felt my heart clench at the familiar sight and my usual
calm was already melted away the moment I had set eyes on her. My
sweet Goddess. Not trusting the silence and the seemingly endless
moment anymore, I put my arms around her neck and pulled her forward.
Lips met in a fierce, desperate, hopeful, longing kiss that was
filled with the craving of millennia over millennia of living with a
cruel, painful curse that we had been unaware of for so long, a
loneliness fueled and never really satisfied over all this time,
filled with the feelings that were just reserved for us. Us and
nobody else. Everything what mattered was the other, everything that
was of importance was us. Again. Finally.
Lips parting, I gazed up at the simple, unyielding eternal
love gazing down at me, healing my long-tortured heart with just this
one look, simply that love, from her. I did not know what exactly was
happening, why it happened now or if we were ever going to leave here
again. But I had to know, because if we would leave, I would not
leave without her. Never again. Never, ever again.
"Is this Heaven?" I asked. The moment the words left my lips
everything went wide and we heard the calling of our hope. Yet, I
certainly didn't know, if I really wanted to go. We had no chance
though.
---End Flashback---
A long time ago, several dozen lifetimes before the here and now,
when this solar system was still no more than an infant, there was a
time of innocence, of absolute peace. Before the galaxy knew of the
Star Seeds, Sailor Crystals and Sailor Senshi, before the creatures
of existence knew of the endless war between Order and Chaos, the
constant struggle between Good and Evil.
Upon this time, we had lived the first time, our first
lifetime. I had been raised as the actually first princess of my
planet. She had been there as long as I could think. We grew up as
sisters but we were not. We were much more than that, much more than
sisters - even by blood - could ever be. We were, as simple as it
sounds, harmony. Two innocent girls from the same basic roots of the
same, oldest tribe of the human species. We were pure, innocent and
perfect for each other.
Then... Chaos had come and everything was shattered. The
first Sailor Senshi were discovered. Senshi all over the galaxy, just
like us. However, by then the inevitable had already occurred, the
expected had transpired and there was no going back anymore. We had
fallen in love. And that was when we learned the hard way, that the
universe was a cruel place. Not the shiny, peaceful world that we had
grown up in. But a harsh, painful and cold reality. I was a Senshi,
she was another. The first was okay, the second not. Not then it
meant we were together.
They forced us apart, didn't grant us our love, declined us
the right of decision. Her power was too dangerous they said... They
didn't even know. How could they know? How SHOULD they know? Who gave
them the RIGHT to decide? They sealed her away and to make sure
something like that would never happen again, cursed us. They cursed
us both to never find true love again. And it was right. We never did
find TRUE love again over all the following lifetimes because the
only true love there ever was for us, was the other. And she was
unreachable.
I did understand now. All the time I had thought Adonis to be
right and he was. I had fought it, with all my heart, and yet I had
never succeeded. In the end he had been right, but ironically instead
of it being his fault as I always thought, he merely stated a fact.
It had been her all along I was searching. Her, the only one that
could free me, the only one that could break the seal to my heart.
And yet, even then we met the first time, I had not recognized her.
We had not realized what we were for each other. We had to die first
to break the curse placed upon us by the oh so wise elders of our
times for a crime as beautiful and innocent as love. In the end, it
did not matter. We had found each other again. Here and now.
"No," I whispered, responding to the question she had asked,
right before we left, "this is our second chance. Just like we hoped
for." Tilting her chin up a little more with one hand, I put the
other around her waist and pulled her close for a kiss of ageless
quality. The first real, physical kiss for us in millennia, the first
one in our new lives here. It was truly beautiful how such a tiny
gesture of affection could cause reactions like this. I felt truly
reborn. Reborn in a new life, with a new hope and with her at my
side, always, forever. There would be nothing and nobody again who
could separate us. Nobody should be stupid enough to dare, not with
all this time we had waited. Waited for this new chance, this second
time we met, as friends like the first time and then growing into
something more. Something far more beautiful. Our stars were shining
again. Together. Brighter than ever, brighter than they ever could
alone. We had wished for it and finally the wish had been granted.
The endless suffering had found an end. And anything else didn't
matter anymore.
I could have stood there forever, never letting go, never
leaving this comfortable space that was my heart's safest place.
Right there, with her, nowhere else either of us wanted to be. Never
again. Everything around us was of no importance. The people staring,
whispering about how it wasn't proper to show affection in public,
especially between two girls. What did they know? They were hiding,
were afraid from the purity that love created. That is why they were
making up stupid rules. They were afraid to get hurt, like we did.
But we had overcome the tasks destiny had confronted us with. We had
come out victorious in the end because we had always believed. That
you and I would see each other again in the same way we once had. We
had believed and the belief finally became reality.
I finally broke the contact, pushing the smaller girl away to
be able to see in her face again. The happiness radiating from it was
enough for another thousand lifetimes, however, this time I would
keep it. Right here, with me. Near me, always. Because I needed her
there. My light, my soul, my heart, my confidence, my eternal star
always shining to lead me back to her. All that she was. It did not
matter who we were, had been or are now. We were simply two stars
that were in love. Once we had names that had brought us together the
first time, destined to meet, destined for each other. However, even
when we did not remember them. We were us. Her and me. Me and her.
Venus and Saturn, Aino Minako and Tomoe Hotaru, it did not matter. A
second chance was given to us today and we would use it because...
Like they say: Love conquers all, right? It certainly was true in our
case.
"Aishiteru," I said, just like her, at the same time. I took
her hand and started to leave. "Let's go..." She gripped my hand
tightly and I drew her closer to me as we walked into the sunset. It
had only been a minute or two since we met under the fountain, but so
much had changed. Clearly for the better.
"Yes," she finished, "towards a new future."
THE END
Author's Notes
Yes, okay that was a bit sappy, right? I can't help since I was just
in the right mood for a little short story (when this happens, it
usually does on Friday afternoons...). I could probably blame Ayrki
after reading something similar from her but I won't since I had the
idea to do this even before I read hers.
I hope you liked this little piece of work. The whole thing is
especially for my standards really short and leaves a lot to the
imagination. This wasn't meant to be detailed. I left a lot of points
pretty open for interpretation and will leave them so. You can come
up with your own theories, I'm sure.
That is actually everything for this one. I hope you enjoyed.
Ja ne, yours
Matthias
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