vol 1 part 2 Lemon Tea ------------------------------------------------ The birds chirped as the sun rose over the Tendo Dojo. Nabiki yawned and opened her eyes to see Ranko sleeping peacefully next to her. She gently nudged the girl in an effort to wake her. Ranko moaned and rolled over. "I don't wanna go to school today." she said in her sleep. Nabiki giggled and nudged her harder. Ranko moaned louder and rolled onto her back. "Go away, Yoiko. We're supposed to be on vacation." she said, still asleep. Nabiki was faintly annoyed at being mistaken for another woman. She was tempted to push Ranko off the bed and onto the floor, but came up with a better idea. "Wake up, Sleeping Beauty." Nabiki said and gave her a kiss. Ranko smiled and opened her eyes. "Good morning, Love." she said. "That depends. Why did you think Yoiko was waking you?" Nabiki asked with a serious look on her face. "Err...it's not what you think." Ranko said. "She's usually the one that has to drag me out of bed." "Relax, Ranko, baby." Nabiki said with a grin. "You're past love life doesn't bother me. Actually, I think it's kind of a turn on." "Hate to disappoint you." Ranko said. "Yoiko is one of the most heterosexual people I know." "Homophobic?" Nabiki asked. "We wouldn't be friends if she was." Ranko replied. "It doesn't bother her that I like girls as well as guys. It's just not something she would ever want to do." "What about you as a guy?" Nabiki asked. "If we were strangers, maybe." Ranko answered. "But since we've known each other since we were children, she'll always think of me as a girl." "Probably just as well." Nabiki said. :If her reaction to the opposite sex is anything like Ryoga's, then taking her virginity will prove difficult." "Oh, I solved that problem." Ranko said offhandedly. "No more nosebleeds for her." "You mean she's not a virgin!" Nabiki said. "Wait a minute. I thought you said she's got the hots for Kuno. What will her boyfriend think?" "What boyfriend? It was a one night stand." Ranko said. "So how did you calm her down enough to get fucked?" Nabiki asked. "It's amazing what you can do with pressure points." Ranko said with a grin. "Care for a demonstration?" "I'll have to take a raincheck." Nabiki answered. "I got to get back in my own bedroom before anyone notices." 'You're saying we got to keep it a secret?!?" Ranko said with a hurt look on her face. "It's not that I don't love you. It's just that I can't go say 'Hi, Daddy. Ranko and I are in love. Hope you don't mind that we're both girls.' The shock might kill him. Or me." "I see your point." Ranko said. "Okay, for now it's our secret. But don't expect me to go to any great lengths to keep it." "Good enough for me." Nabiki said and gathered up her clothes. She opened up the door to find herself face to face with Kasumii. "Oh, my!" Kasumii said. "Oh, hell." Nabiki said. "Oh, shit." Ranko said. "Nabiki, please tell me you haven't been doing what I think you've been doing." Kasumii said, her eyes darting back and forth between the two naked girls. "Um...well..." For the first time in her life, Nabiki couldn't think of what to say. "I think Father will want to hear about this." Kasumii said and started to head towards Soun's room. "Wait! You can't!" Nabiki yelled. "Why not?" Kasumii asked. "Kasumii, you're one of only three people that I truly respect. So don't make me do something I'll regret." Nabiki said. "Like what?" Kasumii asked. "Like Mayaka." Nabiki answered. Kasumii froze in her tracks. "You wouldn't." "If you tell Daddy about my love life, then I'll tell him about yours." "Very well. I'll overlook this 'incident'." Kasumii said with a defeated tone. "And any others." Nabiki added. "On one condition. How did you find out about me and Mayaka?" Kasumii asked. "You and she did a good job of keeping your relationship a secret. But you were careless at her graduation party." "That was our last time together." "I'm sorry. I didn't know." Nabiki said. "It's not important." Kasumii said. "I suggest both of you take baths before breakfast. Separately, if you don't mind. Ranko, I'll speak with you later." Then she left to take care of her chores. "Nabiki?" Ranko asked. "Let me see if I got this straight. Mayaka is..." "Kasumii's girlfriend from high school." Nabiki replied. "Kasumii...and another woman? Now that's something I wouldn't have expected." "I was as surprised as you." Nabiki said. "But, like I said, I respect her, so I didn't want to use that information unless absolutely necessary." "You said you only respect three people?" "Until I met you it was two people." Nabiki said with a grin. "I'm flattered." Ranko said. "Who's the third person?" "Nad..." Nabiki stopped herself. Ranko wasn't supposed to know about Nadoka. "Err...I mean Nabiki. Me, that is." "Ooh, self respect. I like that in my women." Ranko said. "I'm not your woman. If anything, you're mine." Nabiki said coldly. "It was just an expression." "I know, I'm just teasing." Nabiki said, smiling. "Well, I get the bathroom first. I'll call you when I'm done." Ranko watched as Nabiki left. She then went to the window to let in the morning air. Upon opening the window she heard the sounds of a battle in the yard below. "What the hell!" Ranko said as she saw what looked like her father and brother beating the crap out of each other. Meanwhile, down in the yard, Ranma and Genma were sparing as they do every morning. They leaped across the pond at each other, throwing punches and kicks with each pass. "Didn't we so through this yesterday, old man." Ranma said, landing on the far side of the pond. "And we'll do it every day! I can't have you wasting your time off of school, now can I?" Genma yelled, landing on the side of the pond closest to the house. "Child abuser!" Ranko yelled, planting a kick into Genma's back and knocking him into the pond. "Way to go, Sis!" Ranma yelled, hopping across the pond and landing next to her. "What the fuck was that all about?" Ranko asked. "Just his idea of training." Ranma answered. Panda then emerged from the pond. Enraged, he lunged toward his children, grabbing them and tossing them toward the water. Ranma landed with a splash. Ranko, however, stopped in midair and stood floating a foot above the surface of the water. "Nya, Nya! Can't get me!" Ranko yelled. [Don't get cocky!] Panda signed. "If I land in the pond, I'll get real cocky!" Ranko said with a grin. "Mind giving me a hand?" Ranma-chan said and grabbed Ranko's ankle. "No!" Ranko yelled. The moment Ranma made contact, she dropped like a rock into the pond. "Sorry." Ranma said to a soaked Ranko-kun. "It's okay. I just need to take a bath now." he said. "Care to join me?" "I can't take a bath with a girl!" Ranma yelled. "Get your mind out of the gutter. I'm your sister." Ranko said and looked down at his body. "Or brother, as the case may be." "Well, I still pass." Ranma said. "Your loss." Ranko said and walked into the house. After waking up, Akane left her room and found Ranko standing outside the bathroom. "Ranma?" Akane said. "Nope." Ranko said. "Green eyes, remember?" "Sorry, Ranko." Akane said. "I'm just not used to seeing you as a guy." "That's okay. Besides, Ranma wouldn't be a guy if he was wet like I am." he replied. "What happened, anyway?" Akane asked. "Dad and Ranma were fighting and I sorta jumped into the fray." Ranko replied. Akane giggled. "Well, I've learned to let them go at it and they'll finish eventually." "Yeah. Well, now I'm stuck waiting for Nabiki to get done with her bath." "I thought she took a bath before she went to bed last night." Akane said. "Why does she need one now?" "Let's just say she had a busy night." Ranko said while trying to keep a straight face. "Huh?" Akane looked puzzled. "Never mind." Ranko said. "How lone does she usually take?" "She usually doesn't come out unless you make it worth her while." Akane replied. "You just lost me." "I'll show you." Akane ran to her room and returned with a wad of cash. "Watch." she said and slid a hundred yen note under the door. "You'll have to do better than that." Nabiki said from the other side of the door. Akane grumbled and slid a five hundred yen note under the door. Five seconds later Nabiki appeared with a towel wrapped around her body. "All yours." she said and ran off to her room. Ranko smiled, then saw Akane's irritated look. "Relax." he said. "I'll buy you lunch later." "It's a deal. Enjoy your bath." she said and headed downstairs. Ranko entered the changing room and stripped off his T-shirt and boxers. He saw his reflection in the mirror and flexed his muscles. "Yep, I'm a stud." he said, then looked down at his crotch to see that he was getting aroused. "As much fun as you were last night, now is not the time." In the bathroom, Ranko filled a bucket of warm water and poured it over his head. He sighed as he felt the change in her body. The sensations were quite pleasurable, provided that she expected it instead of being surprised. After lathering up and rinsing off, she lowered her body into the furo. She leaned back and closed her eyes, letting the hot water relax her muscles. *Creak* Ranko heard the bathroom door open and someone enter. "Change your mind?" she asked without opening her eyes. "About what?" Kasumii asked. Ranko's eyes snapped open and she jerked her head around to see Kasumii standing naked before her. "Kasumii! What are you doing?!" Ranko yelled. "Taking a bath." Kasumii stated simply. "Err...you want I should leave?" Ranko asked. "No We need to talk and this way we can get some privacy." Kasumii said as she washed up and rinsed off. "Okay." Ranko said, moving over so Kasumii could get in the furo. "This is about me and Nabiki, right?" "No. This is about you and my family, but we can start with Nabiki." Kasumii replied. "You're going to chew me out now, aren't you?" Ranko said with and ashamed look on her face. "No. As Nabiki reminded me earlier, love between two women, while not socially acceptable, is not something you can prevent." Kasumii said. "You do love her, right?" "With all my heart." Ranko answered with determination. "Can you keep this love a secret?" Kasumii asked. "I've been through this with Nabiki." Ranko said. "I don't like to hide my feelings if I don't have to." "In this case you have to." Kasumii said. "My father can tend to over react in regards to. the welfare of his daughters, and I think your father would be the same." "So don't tell our Dad's, right?" Ranko asked. "Right." Kasumii answered. "But I can tell other people, right?" Ranko asked. "Provided you can trust them." Kasumii answered. Ranko gave a relieved sigh. "Good. I'd hate to have to keep this a secret from Ranma." "That's the other thing I wanted to talk to you about." "You don't want to tell my own brother?!?" Ranko was shocked. "Actually, I was going to insist that you do tell him." "Huh?" Ranma has had his curse for a while, but still has trouble adjusting." Kasumii replied. "You seem comfortable with your curse, so I'd like you to help him deal with his. After all, you're the only one who really understands what he's going through." "Yeah, I can see how he might think of himself as less than manly. I sure didn't feel very feminine after I fell in that spring. But, being bisexual helped me adjust quickly." "I'd rather you not suggest that Ranma sleep with any men." "Of course not." Ranko said. "I was having sex with women before Jusenkyo, So turning into a guy is just a new way of doing things. I just have to explain to Ranma that he can love a woman just as well when he's female." "Before you do that you should talk to Akane." Kasumii said. "Why?" Ranko asked. "Well, she seems to think that Ranma is a pervert because he can change gender." Kasumii replied. "I'd like you to explain to her that the curse doesn't do that." "Believe me, I know how some people can think that. Especially with my behavior sometimes. But that has nothing to do the curse so Akane won't have to worry." "That's good." Kasumii said with a smile. "Kasumii?" "Yes, Ranko?" "If it's not too personal, Can you tell me who this Mayaka person that Nabiki mentioned is." Kasumii lost her smile. "Yes, it is too personal. Maybe someday, but not now." "Sorry." "That's okay." Kasumii said, her smile returning. "Well, it's about time I started breakfast." she said. Suddenly the water started churning and a whirlpool formed in the center of the furo. "Oh, no." Ranko said. "Ranko, what's happening?" Kasumii asked with a frightened tone. "You don't wanna know." Ranko replied. The whirlpool continued for a few minutes, and then the water started to glow as a young girl hopped out of the vortex and floated above the tub. "Hi, there!" Skuld yelled. "Damn it, Skuld!" Ranko yelled. "You sure have a shitty sense of timing!" "Hmm." Skuld turned around to see Kasumii doing her best impersonation of a deer frozen in headlights. "Did I interrupt an intimate moment. Geez, you don't waste time, do you? It's only been a day." "No, you didn't interrupt anything. But having someone just appear out of your bath can be pretty unnerving." Ranko said. "Now would you please stop floating there and give her time to recover." "Friend of yours?" Kasumii asked, Having regained her senses somewhat." "Yep. Kasumii Tendo, meet the goddess Skuld." "Pleased to meet you." Skuld said, having finally set her feet on the floor by the furo." "Likewise." Kasumii replied. "Oh! I've got to start breakfast. Will you be joining us, Skuld?" "Can I?" Skuld asked. "Of course." Kasumii replied as she got out of the furo and wrapped a towel around her body. "Ranko, it's best that you finish your bath soon." "You got it." Ranko said and grabbed a towel. After Kasumii left Skuld turned to Ranko. "You sure you weren't doing anything before I got here?" "Just having a peaceful conversation." Ranko said and then whispered in her ear. "To be honest, I'm more interested in her sister." "What is it with you and girls?" "Relax, kid. It's just one of those things." "Don't call me a kid! We're the same age you know." "Physically, maybe. But when it comes to immaturity, you've got me outclassed." "And don't you forget it." Skuld replied, and then realized what she just said. "Hey, wait a min..." "C'mon. I'll show you my room." Ranko said and went to open the bathroom door. "Sweeto!" Happosai yelled as he leaped forward and glomped onto Ranko's breasts, pulling her towel off in the process. "Aaaahhh! A virus!" Skuld screamed. "ooohh...yeah..." Ranko moaned as Happosai continued to fondle her. "Ranko! Don't move!" Skuld yelled and pulled Mjonor, her trusty mallet, off her back. "huh?...no...don't..." Ranko said weakly. *Bash* Skuld slammed her hammer into Happosai's skull, knocking him to the ground. "Hey! I was enjoying that!" Ranko yelled. "Hmm?" Skuld said as she examined the heap at Ranko's feet. "I thought they were supposed to disappear when I hit them." Suddenly Happosai's eyes snapped open. "Pretty lady!" he yelled and glomped onto Skuld. "Aaaah! Help!" Skuld screamed. "Hey, buddy! You mind finishing with me first!" Ranko yelled and tried to peel the old man off the goddess. "Ranma, my boy! Glad to see you're finally come to appreciate the finer things in life!" Happosai yelled and leaped toward Ranko, colliding with Ranma-chan's fist. "Leave my sister alone, freak!" Ranma yelled. "Honestly. A girl can't get a cheap thrill around this place." Ranko sounded annoyed as she covered herself with her towel. "I got him!" Skuld yelled. *Bash* *Bash* *Bash* "Skuld." Ranko said. *Bash* *Bash* *Bash* "Skuld!" Ranko yelled. *Bash* *Bash* *Bash* "SKULD!!!" Ranko screamed. "What!" Skuld yelled. "I think you got him." "But...he's supposed to disappear." "Get it through your thick skull that he's not a virus. He's a human!" Ranko looked down at the broken and bloody mass. "Or at least, he used to be." "Don't worry, it takes more than that to kill him." Ranma said. "Believe me, I've tried." "Ranko?" Skuld asked. "Why are their two of you?" "There aren't." Ranko said. "This is Ranma." "But Ranma's your brother." Skuld said. "He is." Ranko replied "Apparently gender bending runs in the family." [Does not!] Panda signed as he, Soun, Akane, and Nabiki appeared in the hall. "What's all the noise?" Soun asked. "Apparently, Happosai attacked Ranko and her friend beat him to a pulp." Ranma answered. [Really?] Panda signed. Soun grabbed Skuld's hand and shook it heartily. "Thank you, young lady. You are a godsend." "No, I'm a goddess." Skuld said. "You're a what?" Akane asked. "Let me guess. You're one of Urd's sisters, right?" Nabiki asked. "Unfortunately." Skuld replied. "What's that supposed to mean?" Nabiki asked. "Never mind her." Ranko said. "She and Urd don't exactly get along." "Only because she's arrogant and selfish and violent and pushy and impulsive and..." "Hey!" Ranko yelled. "That's my mentor you're talking about!" "Well it's true." Skuld said. "So their really is an Urd?" Akane asked. "Of course." Ranko answered. "Only a complete psycho would make up a story like that." "Yeah." Skuld said. "Ranko's only partially psychotic." "Hey!" Ranko yelled. "That's what you get for calling me thick skulled." Skuld said with a grin. "Aren't you forgetting someone?" Happosai asked from the floor. "Aaaahhh!" Skuld screamed. "It's alive!" She swung her hammer down at him. "Sorry, cutie. I don't fall for the same trick twice." Happosai said as he stopped Mjonor with one finger. "Now, Soun, Genma. You have some explaining to do." [Her fault.] Panda signed and pointed at Skuld. "Yes. She did it." Soun said." We would never dream of beating the crap out of you, Master." "Not that, stupid!" Happosai said and smacked them both in the head. "I mean them." He pointed at Ranma and Ranko. [That's my daughter.] Panda signed. "You don't have a daughter." Happosai said. "He does now." Ranko said. "Ranko Saotome, at your service." "That's the right idea." Happosai said and leaped toward her. "Oh no you don't." she said and raised her hand, summoning an invisible wall and stopping Happy in mid glomp. "Sorry, the mood's been ruined." "Breakfast!" Kasumii called from downstairs. "Oh, crap!" Ranma said as she and Panda forced their way into the bathroom to change to their uncursed forms. "Oh, I've got to get dressed." Ranko said and ran to her room. "Um...which way to the dining room?" Skuld asked. A little while later at the dining room table, everyone gazed in wonder at the feast that Kasumii had prepared. "Wow!" Skuld said. "What a spread!" Ranma exclaimed. "Are all your breakfast's this big, Kasumii?" Ranko asked. "No. I just felt guilty because this is the only meal I'm cooking today." she answered. "No lunch or dinner?" Ranma asked. "Oh, did I forget to tell you? Cologne called and said she wanted you and Ranko to stop by her restaurant later today. I figured that you could take Nabiki and Akane with you and have lunch while you're there." Kasumii replied. "But, what about dinner?" Ranma asked. "I've got dinner covered." Akane said. "Too bad I've got concert tickets with my friends tonight." Nabiki said with a grin. "You knew about this, and you didn't warn me!" Ranma yelled. "I would have if I thought I'd get anything out of it." Nabiki replied. "Now, if you want at least one good meal today, you'd better dig in." Ranma turned to see Soun, Genma, Skuld, and Ranko devouring the food. Happosai disappeared at the first mention of Akane's cooking. "Amazing." Skuld said. "This is almost as good as Belldandy's cooking." "Who?" Akane asked. "My big sister." Skuld answered. "Does she think she's a goddess, too?" Akane asked. "What do you mean 'think'!" Skuld yelled and reached for one of her grenades. "Relax, Skuld." Ranko said. "She's just a little skeptical." "Humans can be such a pain sometimes." Skuld said, sounding annoyed. "Hey! I'm human!" Ranko yelled. "Only until you get your qualification." Skuld replied. "Do I even want to know?" Akane asked. "Probably not." Ranko replied. She turned around to see Genma stealing food from her plate. "Hey! Don't make me freeze you again." "Ranko!" Skuld yelled. "You know what happens when you use too much magic" "What happens?" Nabiki asked. "Er...let's just say that my batteries run down, and the rest ain't pretty." "I shouldn't have asked, should I?" Nabiki asked. "Nope." Ranko replied. "You wouldn't have this problem if you had something simple for a power source, Ranko." Skuld said. "Not all of us can stop by Haagen Dazs to get a recharge." she replied. "Would you two stop it." Akane said. "You're giving me a headache." "Okay, back to normal conversation." Ranko said. " So, you really think Kasumii's cooking is as good as Belldandy's" "You bet." Skuld said. "I'm flattered." Kasumii said. "I have to invite you over to our house so you and she can trade recipes." Skuld said. "Okay." Kasumii replied. The rest of breakfast went by without incident. After the meal, Nabiki and Skuld went with Ranko up to her room. "Hey, Skuld." Ranko said. "I thought you were gonna bring my stuff with you." "I did." Skuld said and pulled out a metal ball with loops of cable sticking out of it. "Nabiki! Get down!" Ranko yelled and they both jumped behind the bed. "Ranko. You can come out now." Skuld said. "This isn't a bomb." "Then what is it?" Ranko asked as she peeked out from behind the bed. "It's my latest invention, Mister Matter Compressor." "Huh?" Nabiki said. "Watch." Skuld said and tossed the ball on the bed. There was a flash of light and suddenly they found themselves surrounded by boxes. "Impressive." Nabiki said. "You know, Skuld. You could have made more than one trip." Ranko said. "And let my talents go to waste?" she replied with a grin. "What's in all these boxes, anyway? Nabiki asked. "What's written on them?" Ranko asked. "Well, these two say 'His' and 'Hers'." Nabiki said, pointing to two small boxes. "Let's see." Ranko said and opened the boxes. "That's my male and female wardrobe." "Here, let me help." Nabiki said and they took the clothes and hung them in the closet. "You know, for a teenage girl, you don't have much in the way of clothes." Ranko looked in the closet and saw that it was half empty. "Maybe you're right. You'll have to take me shopping sometime." "And where will you get the money for all the things you'll need?" Nabiki asked. "I'm not a freeloading house guest. Here." Ranko said and pulled a savings account passbook out of a box and handed it to Nabiki. Nabiki's eyes grew wide as she looked at the amount in the passbook. "My god. There's over twenty million yen in here. Did I mention how much I love you?" "You mean she's the one you're interested in?" Skuld asked Ranko. "Yep." Ranko answered, and then remembered what Kasumii told her. "Don't tell our dads, okay?" "Okay." Skuld replied. "What's in this box? Nabiki said, pointing to a box marked 'Potions'. "Those, my love, are the weapons of choice for a love goddess like me." Ranko said and opened up the box. She removed a box marked 'Lemon Tea' and absentmindedly set it on top of the box marked 'Kitchen'. Then she removed a few more boxes and bottles until she found what she was looking for. "Ah! There they are." "There what are?" Nabiki asked. "Here. Suck on this, but don't swallow." Ranko said and handed her what looked like a jawbreaker. "That's not what you said last night." Nabiki said with a grin and popped the candy in her mouth. "Okay, now what?" she asked. "Now this." Ranko said and poked Nabiki in the nose with her index finger. "Aaahh!" Nabiki yelled as her body shook with a powerful orgasm. "I was good, wasn't I?" Ranko said with a grin. "Wow." Nabiki said and spit out the candy. "What is that stuff?" "Just a little something I designed." Ranko said with pride. "Any human contact will cause similar results. Of course, if you swallow the jawbreaker the effects will last untill it's digested." "Thanks for the warning." Nabiki said. "Are you two through having fun yet?" Skuld asked with an irritated tone. "That reminds me." Ranko said. "Is my toy chest around here somewhere?" "Yeah, over there." Skuld said and pointed to the box marked 'Toys'. "Aren't you a little old for toys?" Nabiki asked and opened the box. Inside were assorted vibrators and strap ons and other sex toys. "Oh. Never mind." "Speaking of toys, there's your computer." Skuld said and pointed to the box marked 'Computer'. "I thought I broke it." Ranko said. "Only because you erased half the files so you could play Might and Magic." Skuld said. "I upgraded it so now you have five million gigabytes of memory. Use that up and you're on your own." "What's in this?" Nabiki said and pointed to a box with a label in a language she couldn't read. "It says 'Equipment'." Ranko said. "What language is that?" Nabiki asked as she stared at the writing. It looks like some kind of futuristic hieroglyphs." "It is the divine language." Skuld said. "Which means you added this to my stuff." Ranko said. "Okay, fess up. What's in the box?" "Glad you asked, James." Skuld said with a smile. "James?" Nabiki asked. "Bond." Ranko replied. "Huh? Oh, I get it." Nabiki said. "Ahem." Skuld broke in. "If I may." "Okay." Ranko said. "What do you got." "The first item I have for you is this." Skuld said and held up a small black cylinder with a red button on one end. "What does it do?" Ranko asked. "This." Skuld said. She grabbed Ranko's right hand and pressed one end of the cylinder against her palm. Than she pushed the red button on the other end. "Yeow!" Ranko yelled as a sharp pain shot through her hand. "What was that for!" "You now have a hammerspace manipulator implant." Skuld stated. "A hammer what?" Nabiki asked. "Hammerspace manipulator." Skuld said. "It allows her to send and retrieve objects from a pocket dimension I discovered." "Why 'hammerspace'?" Nabiki asked. "When I was little I wondered why some people could pull mallets from thin air." Skuld explained. "I eventually stumbled onto a small dimension with all these hammers floating around. It's where I found Mjonor." "Enough with the history!" Ranko yelled. "That doesn't explain why I'm in pain here!" "Does it still hurt?" Skuld asked. "Ye...no. The pain's gone." Ranko examined her hand. "Cool. No scars. So, what did you say this thing does?" Skuld sighed. "Weren't you paying attention. Here." She grabbed a bottle off the bed and handed it to Ranko. "What am I supposed to do with this?" Ranko asked. "Consintrate on the bottle. Imagine that it isn't in your hand." Skuld said. "Okay." Ranko looked in her hand and the bottle wasn't there. "Where did it go?" "I told you, it's in hammerspace." Skuld said "Try it again." "Okay." Ranko grabbed a vibrator out of the box of sex toys and made it disappear. "Now consintrate on the bottle. Imagine that it is in your hand." Skuld said. "Okay." Ranko said and looked down to see the bottle in her hand. Cool! Nabiki, gimme something else." Nabiki handed her the savings passbook which she made disappear. Then she made the vibration appear. "Don't get carried away." Skuld warned. "The implant runs off the same energy that you use for magic." "So I can't use it too often?" Ranko asked. "Correct." Skuld replied. "Also, the amount of objects you can store isn't unlimited. You can only keep about a dozen small objects at one time. "In other words, don't use the implant for extra closet space?" Nabiki asked. "Correct." Skuld said. "I got to admit, this is one of your better ideas." Ranko said. "Thanks." Skuld said. "The next item isn't really mine." She handed Ranko a pen with a jewel attached to one end. "Hey! Isn't this the transformation pen Luna gave me?" Ranko asked. "She said I could keep it as a souvenir because it was damaged." "Well, it's not damaged anymore." Skuld said with a grin. "You fixed it? Awesome!" Ranko said and held the pen up in the air. "Stop!" Skuld yelled. "I made some modifications." "Like what?" Ranko asked. "Well, the AI chip was damaged beyond repair." Skuld said. "The best I could do was replace it with a memory chip." "Which means?" Ranko asked. "It won't change you into anything you want. You have to enter the outfit into the memory first." "I can deal with that." Ranko said. "Anything else?" "Um...yeah." Skuld said. "The power cell was damaged too. The pen will put a constant drain on your body's energy while it's in use." "How much of a drain? Ranko asked. "It depends on how complex the program is." Skuld replied. "For example, I programmed it with a modified hard suit, and that will wear you down after a couple of hours." "Great." Ranko said. "Any good news?" "Yes. The hard suit isn't the only thing I programmed." Skuld answered with a grin. "And considering the pen's origin, I felt that it was necessary that I program it to use minimal energy, so you can use it for a whole day without needing a recharge." "So, what is it?" Ranko asked. "Your Sailor Earth costume, of course." Skuld replied. "Sailor Earth?" Nabiki asked. "This I've got to see." "You got it." Ranko said and held the pen over her head. "Disguise Power! Change me into Sailor Earth!" She yelled and was surrounded by a bright white light. Nabiki thought she could see Ranko standing naked through the brightness. When the light faded, Ranko was dressed in a modified sailor fuku with a bright blue skirt and a bright red bow on her chest. On her hands were white gloves that went to her elbows, and on her legs were red boots that went to her knees. Finally, on her head was a gold tiara. "How do I look?" She asked and struck a superhero pose. "I take back what I said about you and Ranma having the same taste in clothing." Nabiki said while giggling. "Hey! This happens to be the official uniform of the Sailor Scouts." Ranko said. "You mean they're real?" Nabiki asked. "I thought they were just rumor." "Nope, they're real." Ranko answered and then grinned. "You could say that I got to know a couple of them very well." "That explains why they let you become one of them." Nabiki said. "Don't let her fool you." Skuld said. "She's not a real Sailor Scout." "Am too!" Ranko yelled. "Then how come you don't have any energy based powers like the other Scouts?" Skuld asked. "Nobody's perfect." Ranko answered glumly. "Cheer up. I'm sure that with the magic you've learned, you can improvise." Skuld said. "Thanks, Skuld." Ranko replied "I take back half the bad things I've ever said about you." "Only half?" Skuld asked. "I'm saving the other half for a rainy day." Ranko replied with a mischievous look. "Well, maybe this will change your mind." Skuld said. She reached into the equipment box and pulled out a small metal disk. "Sleipnir, converge on present coordinates." she said. "It can't be." Ranko said. "What?" Nabiki asked, "What is Sliepnir?" Ranko was about to answer when screaming started coming from outside. The three girls ran down stairs to see Akane screaming and pointing up. Ranma just looked up in shock. "We're being invaded!" Akane yelled. And sure enough, a spaceship floated above the dojo. (Same design as Adam Warren's version of the Lovely Angel.) "Akane, calm down." Ranko said. "It's just my ship, Sliepnir Mark Two." "You mean that's yours?" Akane asked. "Yep." Ranko replied. "Skuld, we can't land it here. Send it back." "Okay." Skuld said. "Sliepnir, assume lunar orbit." With that, the ship flew off into the sky. "Uh...Ranko?" Ranma asked. "Did you just say that that was your spaceship?" "Yes." Ranko replied. "And Skuld was just about to explain why she decided to scare the shit out of half of Nerima." "Sorry." Skuld said. "I just wanted to show you that I fixed the six foot hole you put in the hull." "Apology accepted." Ranko said. "So, anything new on the ship that I should know about.." "Well, apart from the remote unit I used to call it here I added an orbital laser strike unit with target recognition circuits." Skuld said. "Huh?" Ranko asked. "You can ask it to blow up stuff from orbit." Skuld replied. "Cool" Ranko said and reached for the remote. Skuld pulled it out of her reach. "Before I give this to you, you have to promise only to use in emergencies." Skuld said. "You almost got arrested by the Galaxy Police last time." "Okay, I promise." Ranko said. "On your honor as a goddess," "All right, already. I promise on my honor as a goddess that I won't use your spaceship unless it's an emergency." Ranko said. "Okay." Skuld said and handed her the remote. "Just pin it on your shirt when you use it. The instructions are in with your stuff." "Ranko, what are you wearing?" Akane asked. Ranko looked down to see that she was still in her Sailor Earth outfit. "Oops!" she said and concentrated on making her old clothes reappear. *Beep* *Beep* *Beep* Skuld looked at her watch. "Oh, good. It's done." she said. "What's done?" Ranko asked. "I set up a temporal vortex before I came here, and it should have finished forming by now." Skuld replied. "Temporal vortex?" Ranko asked, and then smiled. "I get it. You've got a date with Mackie, right?" "Jealous?" Skuld asked. "Depends." Ranko answered. "Are you letting any of the other Knight Sabers in on the action?" "What is it with you and girls?" Skuld said. "Besides, I love Mackie for his mind." "I don't know." Ranko said. "Sylia is pretty smart." "But, she's his sister." Skuld said. "He'd never go for it." "Hey, incest can be fun, if you do it right." Ranko said. "WHAT!" Akane yelled and glared at Ranma. "Now there's an idea." Nabiki said. "I didn't do anything! I swear!" Ranma yelled. "Relax, Akane. It was just a thought." Ranko said. "Well, keep your perverted thoughts to yourself." Akane said. "As much fun as it is, watching you fight like this, I don't want to keep my boyfriend waiting." Skuld said and headed to the bathroom. "Bye." "Ranma!" Kasumii called from the house. "Don't forget that you have to take your sister to the Cat Cafe for lunch." "Okay, Kasumii!" he replied. "Oh! Could you stop by the market and get me some oregano and basil? We ran out." Kasumii asked. "I've got some of that." Ranko said. "Just grab to box in my room marked 'Kitchen'. "It's got spices and herbal tea and stuff like that." "Thank you, Ranko." Kasumii said and went to get the box. "That reminds me." Ranko said. "I have this hammerspace implant, might as well use it." In the hall she passed Kasumii carrying the box for the kitchen. What she didn't notice was the lemon tea box on top of it. "Let me see. What items do I want on call in case of an emergency." Ranko asked herself. "Couldn't wait to play with your new toys, could you?" Nabiki asked from the doorway. "Nope." Ranko said. She put her transformation pen and Sliepnir remote in hammerspace. Then she grabbed a twelve inch silver dagger. "Woah!" Nabiki said. "Are you planning on using that on someone?" "I am a monster hunter, remember?" Ranko replied. "The job requires me to be lethal at times. Besides, you never know when I might run into Mom." "Let's hope that never happens." Nabiki said. "I'd hate to lose my sweet and innocent Ranko." "You really think I'm sweet and innocent?" Ranko asked. "No, but I can pretend, can't I?" Nabiki said with a grin. "Now can we go?" "Just one more thing." Ranko said and grabbed a scroll and made it disappear. "What's the scroll for?" Nabiki asked. "It's complicated." Ranko answered. "Let's just say that I told someone that I'd carry it with me at all times." "Okay." Nabiki said, deciding not to ask. "Let's go. After all, I wouldn't want to miss my free lunch." "Free?" Ranko asked. "Yeah. You're paying." Nabiki said. "I had to ask." Ranko said as they left with Ranma and Akane to the Cat Cafe. "Son-In-Law!" Cologne called from the kitchen as they entered the restaurant. "You and your sister have a seat. I'll be with you in a moment." "What about us?" Akane asked. "Oh. Akane." Cologne said with a no small amount of animosity. "You and your sister may join us, if you wish." "Thanks, we will." Nabiki said and took a seat. "Mousse, can we get some menus?" Mousse handed them four menus and then looked at Ranko and Ranma. "So, the old woman was right. There are two of you." "No. There's one of me and one of him." Ranko replied. "You know what I mean." Mousse said." "Listen, I'm sorry about what happened yesterday." Ranko said. "I didn't know that me and Ranma looked alike in our female forms." "I am prepared to forgive you on one condition." Mousse said. "The old woman told me that you are cursed to change into a man that resembles Ranma, right?" "Yes." Ranko replied. "Then promise me that you won't try to take my Shampoo from me." Mousse said. "It was explained to me that Shampoo plans to marry Ranma. I assume that the kiss she gave me was intended for him." Ranko said. "I can't guarantee that I won't respond to any advances she makes, but I will promise that she knows it's me and not Ranma." "That will do." Mousse said. "Is anyone ready with their orders?" "I am." Nabiki said. "I'll have this and this. Oh, and this too." She pointed to three of the most expensive items on the menu. "You do realize that this isn't a free meal?" Mousse asked. "Yes it is." Nabiki replied. "Ranko's paying." "Nabiki!" Akane yelled. "How dare you try to extort a free meal off of Ranma's sister." "It's okay, Akane." Ranko said. "I did promise to buy you lunch, and I'm sure Nabiki can make it up to me." "Just as long as someone pays." Mousse said and went toward the kitchen. "Mousse." Ranko said. "Yes." Mousse replied. "I want you to know that I enjoyed kissing Shampoo." she said. "But I also enjoyed kissing you." Mousse blushed and went into the kitchen. "Ranko, were you just flirting with Mousse?" Akane asked. "Flirting is such a strong word." Ranko replied. "You know, Sis." Ranma said. "If you're looking for a boyfriend, I think you could do better than Mousse." "Don't worry, Bro." Ranko said. "I'm not in the market for a boyfriend at the moment. She winked at Nabiki, who winked back in return. After a few minutes, Cologne appeared with their order. She distributed the food and took a seat across from Ranko. "You wanted to see us?" Ranko asked. "Yes." Cologne said. "I wanted to discuss Shampoo." "I've already been through this with Mousse." Ranko said. "I'll leave her alone if she leaves me alone." "She won't leave you alone." Cologne said. "She plans on killing you." "What!" Ranko yelled. "Over one kiss?" "She has not always been on the best of terms with Ranma's female side." Cologne explained. "When Ukyo and I explained that it was not her betrothed that she kissed, she assumed that it was Ranma's girl half separate from her boy half." "So what you're saying is she's back to wanting to marry me as a guy and kill me as a girl." Ranma said. "No, but since she has no emotional attachments to Ranko, she feels that by killing her she could kill girl-type Ranma without loosing boy-type Ranma." Cologne replied. "The only reason she wasn't attacking your sister last night is because I used an ancient Chinese technique on her." "What technique?" Ranma asked. It involves stamina, endurance, and alcohol." Cologne said. "In other words, you drank her under the table." Nabiki said. "Correct." Cologne replied. "Um...she's not here, is she?" Ranko asked with a nervous tone. Having someone out to kill her was making her a bit uneasy. "No." Cologne replied. "I gave her a remedy for her hangover and then sent her on some errands. She won't be back for at least another hour." "Girl-type Ranma! You I kill!" "Or maybe not." Cologne said. "Shampoo! Wait!" Ranko yelled and ducked as a bonbori was swung at her head." "Shampoo give you Kiss of Death! Now you die!" Shampoo yelled and executed a round house kick, which connected and knocked Ranko to the floor. "Kiss of Death?" Ranko said. "You're from Nyu- che-zu!" "Yes! And now Shampoo regain honor with Amazon tribe." Shampoo yelled and pulled her fist back to deliver a blow that would crush Ranko's skull. <Stop!> Ranko yelled, switching to Chinese. <I have a message from the elders of your tribe.> She pulled out the scroll she earlier placed in hammerspace. <I'll take that.> Cologne said and grabbed the scroll. <This better be good.> Shampoo said. Cologne read the scroll out loud. <It reads: In return for her heroic deeds, the one known as Ranko Saotome is pardoned of any crimes, real or imagined, against the Amazon tribe of Nyu-che-zu. In addition, she and the one known as Yoiko Hibiki are given the status of ally to the tribe and will be treated as such. The Council of Elders.> Shampoo reached down and pulled Ranko to her feet. <I'm sorry.> <Apology accepted.> Ranko replied. "What just happened?" Ranma asked. "Sorry, I forgot you don't speak Chinese." Ranko said. "Well, to make a long story short, Shampoo's tribe was the one that hired me to hunt that monster in China. When I killed it, they gave me a pardon." "Uh, huh. Ranko is Shampoo's friend now." Shampoo said. "Um...where's your bathroom?" Ranko asked. "Over there." Cologne pointed to the restroom. "Nabiki, you have to go, too." Ranko said. "No, I don't." Nabiki said. "Ouch!" she yelled as Ranko grabbed her wrist and dragged her to the ladies room. Ranko pulled Nabiki through the door and locked it behind them. "What was that about!" Nabiki yelled. "You practically pulled my arm out of the soc...mphf." She was silenced by a passionate kiss from Ranko. "Nabiki, I need you. Now." Ranko said, her voice filled with lust. "Now?" Nabiki asked. She knew her lover was a little sex-crazy, but this was ridiculous. "Yes." Ranko cooed and put her hand in Nabiki's panties. "Ohhh." Nabiki moaned as Ranko massaged her pussy. But one look into those green eyes told her something was wrong. "This isn't about sex, is it?" "No." Ranko answered while kissing the nape of Nabiki's neck. "Energy." "Energy?" Nabiki asked as she slid her hand down Ranko's pants, feeling the wetness flowing freely between her legs. "Skuld. Implant. Too much magic." Ranko answered and thrust two fingers deep into Nabiki. "Aaah!" Nabiki yelped. "You mean this is how you recharge!" "Yes." Ranko said, then whimpered as Nabiki removed her hand from her slit. "We haven't got time for both of us to get off, so I'll have to work on you." Nabiki said and pushed the girl to the floor. She pulled down Ranko's pants and boxers, exposing her mound to the open air. "Yes. Please. Fuck me." Ranko moaned. Nabiki was almost amused at how helpless Ranko seemed in this state. She decided to go for broke and thrust her tongue deep into Ranko's sex. This was different from the fingering she did the night before, but Nabiki quickly learned which spots to lick by reading Ranko's reactions. Ranko came quickly, and sat up after a minute of recovery. "Nabiki, I'm sorry." Ranko said. "Don't be. Actually, that was kind of fun." Nabiki said as she went to the sink to wash her hands and face. "But I would like to know why you didn't tell me about this little problem of yours." "I didn't want you to think I was just using you as a battery charger." Ranko said as she stood up and pulled up her pants *Knock, Knock* "You two okay in there?" Ranma called from beyond the door. "Ranma!" Nabiki said as she opened the door. "Hanging around the women's restroom. What will people think?" "Hey! It's not like that!" Ranma yelled. "I just wanted to see what was taking you so long." "Girl stuff." Ranko replied. "You wouldn't understand." "Okay." Ranma said, deciding that he didn't want to know. "We were going to see Ucchan and give her some of the old lady's hangover remedy." "Ukyo too?" Nabiki said. "They must have had some party here last night." "As they were leaving the restaurant, Shampoo grabbed Ranko's shoulder. "Shampoo want to talk to Ranko." "You guys go on ahead. I'll be over in a few minutes." Ranko said. Akane and Ranma left, but Nabiki stayed behind. "Shampoo talk to Ranko in private." Shampoo said to Nabiki. "You were just trying to kill Ranko, so I don't think it's a good idea to leave you two alone." Nabiki replied. "Okay, you stay." Shampoo said and turned to Ranko. <I don't want her to hear what we're saying, so speak in Chinese.> <Okay.> Ranko complied. <What do you want to talk about.> <You're gay, right?> Shampoo asked. <Bisexual, but if I ever had to choose one over the other, I'd probably stick with girls.> Ranko replied. <Why?> <Well, I'm going to marry your brother, but Akane keeps getting in the way.> Shampoo said. <I think she likes his girl side better, so I would like you to keep her away from him.> <Let me get this straight. You want me to seduce Akane so you can have Ranma all to yourself?> <To be blunt, yes.> Shampoo replied. <I can't do that.> Ranko said. <Why not?> Shampoo said. <I bet she'd be great in bed.> <Because I got there first.> Nabiki said in Chinese. "Huh?" Shampoo said. "Greedy girl no know how to talk Chinese." "Maybe not when you first came to Japan." Nabiki answered. "But when it became clear that you were here to stay, I learned." "She's right, too." Ranko said. "I can't be with Akane because I love Nabiki." "Ranko is Shampoo's friend, so no want to tell you this. Nabiki is...what word?" Shampoo thought for the proper translation. "Ah! Cold sushi." "Did she just call me a cold fish?" Nabiki sounded offended. "That it." Shampoo said with a grin. "You cold fish." "Shampoo, you do realize that we were having sex in your restroom less than fifteen minutes ago." Ranko said. "..." Shampoo didn't know what to say. "Here. This should cover lunch." Ranko placed some money in Shampoo's hand. On her way out the door she turned and said. "By the way, If you want more proof that Nabiki isn't frigid, you're more than welcome to join us sometime." "Shampoo is no pervert girl like Akane!" Shampoo yelled as Ranko and Nabiki crossed the street to meet Ranma and Akane outside Ucchan's "What was that all about?" Akane asked. "Apparently Shampoo's got it in her head to make you and Ranko a couple." Nabiki replied. "She knows Ranko's really a girl, doesn't she?" Akane asked. "Yeah, but she's convinced that you're a lesbian." Ranko replied." "I'm a what!?!" "Well, you do hate boys" Ranma said. *Bash* "Ow." "Don't worry, Akane. I told her I could never steal my brother's girlfriend." Ranko said. "I'm not his girlfriend!" Akane yelled. "Yeah! I'd never go out with an uncute tomboy like her." Ranma said. *Bash* "Ow." "Are they always like this?" Ranko asked. "Pretty much." Nabiki replied. Ranma turned to enter Ucchan's when he found the closed sign in the window. "Closed?" "Of course it's closed." Ranko said. "Ukyo's got a hangover, right?" "Oh, yeah." Ranma said. "Well, you're her friend right? So she'll let us in." Ranko went to knock on the door when she found it unlocked. "Hey, Red!" Ranko looked up to find Ukyo and Ryoga at the counter and Yoiko behind the grill. "Yoiko?" Ranko said. I found you in less than a day. This must be a new record." "Ohh...my head." Ukyo groaned. "Here, swallow these." Ranma said and handed her a couple of tablets from the packet Cologne gave him. Ukyo swallowed the tablets and her eyes snapped open. "Hey, my headache's gone. What was that?" "Herbal hangover remedy I got over at Shampoo's" Ranma replied. "That bimbo!" Ukyo yelled. "After all the times we were doing shots at her place, she never mentioned this once." "All the times?" Akane asked. "Yeah, Shampoo and me want to stay on good terms. So when get into arguments we have a drinking contest instead of fighting." Ukyo replied. "It keeps us from killing each other." "Well, that must have been some bender you were on last night." Ranma said. "Usually you won't let anyone near your grill." "She's not just anyone, she's my new employee." Ukyo said. "Employee?" Ranko asked. "Yep." Yoiko said. "Miss Konaji gave me a job as cook and waitress." "Really? How much does it pay?" Nabiki asked, never one to pass up a chance to see how much money someone has. "Who are you?" Yoiko asked. "Oh, that's right. You left before she got home." Ranko said. "This is Akane's sister, Nabiki." "Pleased to meet you." Yoiko said. "And to answer you're question, the job pays 15000 yen a week plus room and board." "Room and board?" Ranko asked. Aren't you going to live with me?" "Well, actually, Ryoga doesn't think I should live at the Tendo's" Yoiko replied. "Why not?" Ranko asked Ryoga. "I hate to tell you this, but your brother can't be trusted around women." Ryoga replied. "What's that supposed to mean?" Ranma asked. "It's bad enough you have to live under the same roof as Akane, but I'm not letting you get your hands on my sister too!" Ryoga yelled. "Yeah, right!" Ranma yelled. "If she's anything like you she'd get lost before she'd get to my bedroom!" "That's right, Yoiko." Akane said. "How are you going to wait tables without getting lost?" "Oh, Red can help with that." Yoiko replied. "She's got a map spell that can help me find my way around buildings and stuff like that." "I hope you don't want me to do it now." Ranko said. "I'm kind of drained and that spell takes a lot of energy." "That's okay. Just don't come to me for a recharge." Yoiko said. "I'm not into that." "Do I want to know?" Akane asked. "Nope." Ranko said. "Hey, Miss Tendo. Did you know that Ryoga turns into a pig when he..." Ryoga put his hand over Yoiko's mouth. "Er...She means I turn into a pig when I eat good cooking. And since she's such a good cook, I can't help myself." Ranko leaned over to Ranma. "What was that all about?" she asked. "I'll explain later." Ranma said. "Well, now that I'm feeling better, I guess we better open up." Ukyo said. "Right, Yoiko?" "Right, Boss." Yoiko replied. "You guys want something to eat." Ukyo asked. "No. We just had lunch and Akane's cooking dinner later." Ranko said. "You poor girl." Ukyo said. "Huh?" Ranko said. "Let's go!" Akane said and pushed Ranko out the door before anyone could insult her cooking. Later at the dojo, Ranko watched while Akane and Ranma spared. "You two are really serious about this martial arts stuff." Ranko said. "You mean you're not?" Akane asked as she threw a dozen punches at Ranma. "C'mon, Akane." Ranma said as he jumped, ducked, or side stepped all of Akane's punches. "She's my sister, she's got to be a martial artist." "Well then, let's see how good she is." Akane said and they both turned to Ranko. "You want to fight me?" Ranko asked. "You think this is a good idea, Akane?" Ranma asked. "I mean, she might hurt you." "I can handle myself." Akane said as she and Ranko took fighting stances. Ranko threw a series of kicks and punches which Akane blocked. Akane countered with a few punches and kicks of her own, which Ranko also blocked. "I think she's taking it easy on you." Ranma said to Akane. "Oh, yeah? Well, block this!" Akane yelled and put all her strength into one big punch. "Oh, shit." Ranko said as the punch connected and knocked her across the dojo, bouncing her off the wall. "Yes! Finally someone I can beat!" Akane yelled and then saw that Ranko wasn't moving. "Oh, God. Ranko!" "Akane. You didn't..." Ranma asked in shock. "I don't know!" Akane yelled as she ran to Ranko. "Call Dr. Tofu!" Just then Ranko's eyes snapped open. She grabbed Akane's legs and knocked her off her feet. Suddenly she was on top of Akane, pinning her arms above her. "Just because I'm not as skilled as you doesn't mean I can't be a sneaky little bitch when I have to." "..." Akane was frozen in terror. "Ranko, stop! You're scaring her!" Ranma yelled. Ranko looked down to see the frightened look on Akane's face and leaped off of her. "I'm sorry, Akane. I got carried away." "That's...okay,...Ranko." Akane said, trying to catch her breath. "What was that all about?" Ranma asked. "Yeah?" Akane asked. "I knew I could break free of you're grasp, but I was too scared to do so." "Even a goddess has her dark side." Ranko replied grimly. "Oh." Akane said. "Well, anyway." Ranko said, reverting to her normal, cheerful self. "As you can see, I'm not that great at unarmed combat." "I would have thought that you'd be better, being a monster hunter and all that." Ranma said. "Nah. I usually let Yoiko do most of the fighting." Ranko replied. "I am pretty good with a sword, though." "Akane!" Kasumii called from the house. "Time to start dinner." The look of terror on Ranma's face surpassed the one that Akane wore moments earlier. She leaned in close and whispered in his ear. "Keep your opinions about my cooking to yourself, or you're dead." "Eating your food is a fate worse than death." Ranma whispered back. "Would you rather I sent Ranko to your mother's for dinner." Akane whispered. An image of Ranko sitting across the dinner table from Nadoka's mutilated corpse popped into Ranma's mind. "You win." "How romantic." Ranko said. "What?" Akane asked. "You're whispering sweet nothings in each others ears." Ranko said with a smile. "I wasn't...she wasn't...we weren't..." Ranma tried finding an excuse that wouldn't get him into more trouble. "Oh, never mind." "Well, off to work I go." Akane said and went off to prepare something which resembled food. "I guess now would be a good time for me to finish unpacking." Ranko said and went to her room. A few minutes later, Ranko was unpacking boxes with Nabiki's help. "Hey, Ranko?" Nabiki asked. "Yeah?" "I was wondering, were you serious about what you said to Shampoo earlier?" Nabiki asked. "You mean about not seducing Akane? You bet." Ranko answered. "I get people together, not break them apart." "No, I mean about inviting her to join us." Nabiki said. "Oh. Sorry. I guess I should have asked you first." Ranko said with an ashamed look. "I never said I was against the idea." Nabiki said. "Although Shampoo wouldn't have been my first choice for a three way." "How about one of your friends, then?" Ranko asked. "I don't think my friends are ready for you yet." Nabiki answered. "Is that why you're going out without me tonight?" Ranko asked with a touch of mock disappointment. "Sorry, Ranko baby. The shows been sold out for weeks." Nabiki answered. "Besides, what would happen with you and me when the lights went down?" "I can control myself." Ranko answered. "That doesn't mean I can." Nabiki said. "Ooh. Maybe I should be warding against you, too." Ranko said as she placed a series of wards around the door and window. "What are you warding against, anyway?" Nabiki asked. "Once these are in place, only you, Kasumii, and Yoiko can get in without being invited." Ranko replied. "Why Yoiko and Kasumii?" Nabiki asked. "Yoiko's my best friend. I trust her with my life, so I can trust her in my room." "What about my sister?" Nabiki asked. "I don't know." Ranko answered. "It's like I know she wants what's best for me, and I would do anything to make her happy. I think I love her, but not the same way I love you. It's hard to explain, because I've never had anyone like her in my life before." "Ranko, you know what you just described?" Nabiki asked. "What?" Ranko asked, because she didn't have a clue. "A mother." Nabiki replied. "I think I'm going to be sick." Ranko said. "Not before Akane's dinner, I hope." Nabiki said with a grin." "Someone's not telling me something." Ranko said. "Let's just say that Akane's cooking is an experience you'll never forget." Nabiki replied. *Ding-Dong* "There's my ride." Nabiki said and ran out of the room, down the stairs, and out the door. "Why do I get the feeling I've got a long night ahead of me?" Ranko asked herself as she finished putting her things away. In the back of her mind she thought that something was missing, but she didn't know what. Later, Genma, Soun, Ranma, and Ranko sat at the dinner table as Akane served her idea of dinner. Kasumii said she had a large lunch, so she wasn't hungry. "What's with you guys?" Ranko asked, looking at the expression of dread on her family's faces. "Nothing's wrong with them. Right, Ranma?" Akane asked. "Er...right." Ranma replied. "Well, since Akane was kind enough to cook this for us, then we might as well dig in." Ranko said and brought a piece of food up to her mouth. "No, wait!" Ranma yelled. "Wait for what?" Ranko asked as she took a bite, Ranma was shocked when his sister didn't have a violent reaction to the food. "Are you feeling all right?" he asked. "Yes. Why?" Ranko replied. "Hey, Akane. It looks like you finally cooked something edible." Ranma said as he and their fathers all took bites...and immediately collapsed on the floor. "Well, at least someone likes it." Akane said. "This reminds me of Urd's cooking." Ranko said. "You mean it's as good as a goddess's food?" Akane asked. "No, it's as bad as a goddess's" Ranko replied while still eating. "What!" Akane yelled. "I take that back. Urd's food is usually moving when she serves it." "Ranko, you jerk!" Akane yelled and punted Ranko outside and into the pond. "What was that all about?!?" Ranko-kun yelled as he climbed out of the water. "You just implied that my cooking sucks!" Akane yelled. "Well, at least I ate it, unlike some people." Ranko yelled, pointing to the twitching forms of Ranma and their fathers. "I'm not speaking to you!" Akane yelled and stormed off it the kitchen. "Temperamental, isn't she?" Ranko asked, but no one was in any condition to answer. In the kitchen, Kasumii was washing dishes when Akane entered. "That jerk!" Akane yelled. "Did Ranma not like dinner?" Akane yelled. "I'm used to Ranma not eating my cooking. It's his sister that's the problem." Akane said. "Oh, my! What did Ranko do?" Kasumii asked. "She actually finished her meal, and then told me how bad it was." Akane answered. "I mean, if she didn't like it, then why did she eat it?" "Maybe she didn't want to hurt your feelings." Kasumii said. "Maybe, but I'm still mad at her." Akane said. "You need something to calm your nerves." Kasumii said. "Would you like a cup of tea?" "Sure." Akane replied. Kasumii looked through the cabinets and found the box marked 'Lemon Tea'. "Ranko gave me a box of lemon flavored tea. Is that okay?" "Yeah." Akane said and took the cup of tea that Kasumii handed her. She took a sip and made a funny face. "Something wrong?" Kasumii asked. "No. It's just that this tea isn't lemon flavored." Akane replied. "It a little bitter." "That's strange." Kasumii said. "There's a hand written label on the box that says 'Lemon Tea', but I can't read the writing on the box." "Maybe it means you're supposed to add lemon juice." Akane said. Kasumii took a slice of lemon and squeezed a few drops into the cup. "How's that?" Akane took a sip. "Much better." Kasumii went to the dining room to see the three men on the floor in pain. "Where's Ranko?" she asked. "In there." Ranma groaned and pointed to the next room where Ranko was watching television. "I see you found out what Akane does when someone insults her cooking." Kasumii said, noticing that Ranko was in his male form. "I didn't mean to insult her." Ranko said. "Akane has trouble controlling her temper sometimes, so you should be careful what you say around her." Kasumii said. "I guess you're right." Ranko said. "I'll apologize first thing in the morning." "Would you like some hot water to change back?" Kasumii asked. "No. I was going to wait up for Nabiki, and..." Ranko grinned. "Well, you know." "No, I don't. And I don't want to, either." Kasumii said and went back to her business. "Something tells me she's still not too thrilled with me sleeping with her sister." Ranko said to himself and returned to watching television. Later that night, Akane laid awake in her bed. She rolled over on her right side. Then she rolled on her left side. Then onto her stomach. Then on her back. "I can't sleep." she said to herself. Normally she'd cuddle up to P-chan when she had trouble sleeping, but he disappeared the day before. "I wish I was with Ranma." She said and sat up straight. "Why did I say that?" She closed her eyes and imagined the first time she saw Ranma as a boy. It was right after Ranma arrived. Too ashamed to admit that he was cursed, he let Akane believe that he was a real girl. So of course Akane didn't think twice about entering the bathroom while Ranma was inside. When she opened the door she found Ranma-kun stepping out of the furo. Her eyes trailed down the hard muscles of his chest down to his manhood, which was rapidly becoming erect as he stared at her body. Akane smiled as she stepped into the bathroom. She knelt before him and took his hard on in her... "Woah!" Akane yelled as she snapped back to reality. "I remember what happened, and me giving him a blow job most certainly did not happen." She remembered that she was afraid of the stranger she found in the bathroom. But she was ashamed to admit that part of her fear was that she was aroused by the first naked man she had ever seen. "Okay, so thinking about Ranma as a guy isn't going to do me any good.." Akane said and closed her eyes, this time imagining Ranma as a girl. It was later that same day. Akane had a fight with Ranma resulting in him getting flattened by a table. She was in the furo in an attempt to relax. After her bath she went to open the door to find herself face to face with a naked Ranma-chan. Akane raised her hand and placed it against the girl's cheek, drawing her in for a gentle kiss. Ranma's hand trailed down Akane's body, coming to rest between Akane's legs. Akane gasped as Ranma inserted a finger into her... "No, no, no." Akane said as she shook her head, banishing the image from her mind. "I am not a lesbian." That was only a half truth, though. While she had a healthy amount of attraction to boys, she also felt something when she was around cute girls. She thought that maybe Shampoo was right and she was a pervert girl. "Well, I'm obviously not going to get to sleep at the moment." she said and went down stairs to break bricks untill she was tired. Downstairs she heard the television on and went to see who was still up. She found the pigtailed boy dressed in boxers and a muscle tee and sleeping in front of the television. "I guess Genma must be snoring again." Akane said and turned off the TV. She turned and was about to try to wake the boy when she noticed the large bulge in his shorts. Something in Akane's mind snapped. She had a need for something all night and it was right in front of her. She got down on her knees and pulled the shorts off of him. Akane wasted no time and grabbed his erection and started stroking it. She leaned forward and ran her tongue along the length of it. When she got to the top she sucked on the head for a moment. Then she ran her tongue down the other side and when she got to the bottom she sucked on his balls. Finally she returned to suck on the tip and started to bob her head up and down, taking in inch by inch untill the whole length was in her mouth and throat. She was too lost in her actions to even think of choking. After a few minutes of work she felt his member begin to pulse as he shot his seed into her stomach. To Akane it was the most delicious thing she ever tasted. She felt him sit up and released his manhood. She looked up to see her lover's eyes. Green eyes. "Oh, God. Ranko..." Akane stood up and took a step back. "Akane..." Ranko said and took a step toward her. "No..." Akane turned and ran toward the kitchen. "Akane, wait!" Ranko yelled and ran after her. In the kitchen, Ranko found Akane over the sink with a knife held to her wrist. "Don't come any closer!" Akane yelled. "Akane, you don't want to do that." Ranko said, trying not to startle her. "Yes, I do!" Akane yelled. "I'm going insane." "Why, Akane? What's making you do this?" Ranko asked. "You have to ask?" Akane said. "I just gave you a blow job, for crying out loud. I think I was hallucinating earlier. How long before I completely lose control and start killing people?!?" "Akane, I'm not going to let you kill yourself." Ranko said. "You can't stop me." Akane said just before an invisible force yanked the knife from her hand. Ranko gave a sigh of relief. The magic he used wasn't enough to deplete his reserves. Akane was in a fragile state, so he'd hate to have to go to her for a recharge. She looked down at the knife in her hand. "Akane, this is a butter knife." Akane fell to her knees. "I can't find my way around the kitchen even if my death depends on it." she said and started to laugh a little crazily. Ranko set the knife down on the counter and saw the 'Lemon Tea' box. "Have you been drinking this?" he asked. "Yeah. It was pretty good with lemon juice." Akane said. "I wonder how it would taste with rat poison." She started looking through the cupboards. "I think I know why you're acting this way." Ranko said. "I told you. I'm insane." Akane said. Ranko sighed and used the hot water from the tap to change back to her female form. "Akane, come with me to my room." "I'm not going to fuck you even if you are a girl." Akane said. "Akane, I can explain what's happening to you." Ranko said. "Sorry. I'm busy trying to commit suicide." Akane said. "Akane, I have a gun in my room." Ranko said. "Really?" Akane asked with an insanely happy look on her face. "If you still want to die after I've told you what I have to, then you can have it." "Deal." Akane said and ran up to Ranko's room. In her room, Ranko dug through her closet and placed three items on the bed. The first item was a bottle with a clear red liquid inside. Next was what looked like a pair of reading glasses. And finally she pulled out a Colt .45 with a full clip. Akane made a grab for the gun but Ranko slapped her hand away. "Listen first, remember?" Ranko said. "Okay, but you'd better hurry up or I'm taking you with me." Akane threatened. Ranko picked up the bottle and handed it to Akane. "Take a sip of this." "What is it?" Akane asked. "What's the matter, afraid I'm going to poison you?" Ranko said. "You'd be doing me a favor." Akane answered and took a sip from the bottle. The insane look on her face disappeared. "Feeling better?" Ranko asked. "Ranko, what's wrong with me?" Akane asked, tears forming in her eyes. "I...I almost..." "I know what your problem is." Ranko said. "You love Ranma." "No, I..." "It's no use denying it." Ranko broke in. "The proof is right here." She handed Akane the box of 'Lemon Tea'. "It says 'Lemon Tea' but I can't read the rest." Akane said. "Here." Ranko handed her the glasses. Akane put on the glasses and looked at the box. "Hey, I can read it now. It says: 'Add lemon juice to the tea and be consumed with uncontrollable lust for the one you love. Warning: Drink only in the presence of your true love. If you don't insanity, depression, and suicide may result. Especially if you have trouble expressing your true feelings.'" The only reason you came to me is because you thought you thought I was Ranma." Ranko said. "My God. I really do love him." Akane said. "Don't you think you should tell him that?" Ranko asked. "I can't. I don't know if he loves me." Akane said. "I see." Ranko said. "I won't tell him untill you're ready." "Crisis over?" Nabiki asked from the doorway. "Nabiki?!?" Akane yelled. "How long have you been here?" Ranko asked. "Long enough." Nabiki answered. "The real question is what will Ranma do when he finds out Akane has been fooling around with his sister?" "How much?" Akane asked. "Nabiki! You can't blackmail her for that!" Ranko yelled. "Ranko baby, I can't have my sister move in on my territory." Nabiki said and went over and kissed Ranko. They both turned to see the shocked look on Akane's face. "You two are..." Akane said. "I suppose you had to find out eventually." Ranko said. "Nabiki and I are lovers." "So it wasn't an act." Akane said. "You really are a lesbian." "Actually, we're both bisexual." Ranko said. "Let's get back to discussing the price of my silence." Nabiki said. "It's not her..." Nabiki put a finger to Ranko's lips. "Watch and learn." "What's this going to cost me?" Akane asked. "I'd rather that Daddy and Mr. Saotome didn't know about me and Ranko." Nabiki said. "So if you keep our activities to yourself, then I might forget that tonight's incident ever happened." "Thanks, Nabiki." Akane said. "I realize you could have asked for more." "Yeah. Well, I guess being in love is making me soft." Nabiki said and then turned to Ranko. "What do you say we spend tonight in my room?" "I've got to talk to Akane first." Ranko said. 'I'll be over in a few minutes." "Don't be too long." Nabiki said and kissed her before leaving. "What do you want to talk about?" Akane asked. "You're not the only person who knows about us." Ranko said. "Kasumii found out this morning." "What did she do?" Akane asked. "Actually, she took it rather well." Ranko replied. "She just said that she wants me to help Ranma adjust to his curse." "What's that have to do with me?" Akane asked. "Well, Nabiki makes love to me in both my forms." Ranko answered. "If things work out between you and Ranma, do you think you could do something like that with him?" "I don't know." Akane replied. "I used to think I was straight, but I'm not so sure anymore." "Loving Ranma as a girl doesn't necessarily mean that you're not straight. He's still a guy on the inside." Ranko said. "It's all a matter of perspective." "But won't he think I'm a pervert?" Akane asked. "I'll explain that love between two women isn't perverted." "Thanks." Akane said. "Um, Ranko?" "Yes?" "I don't know if it was the love potion, but...well..." Akane said. "C'mon. Spit it out." Ranko said. "Well...does it always taste that good?" Akane asked and blushed. Ranko giggled. "I guess 'spit it out' was a poor choice of words." -------------------------------------------------- It's finally done. One of the reasons this took so long was that I got a Sony Play Station with Final Fantasy 7 and Ghost in the Shell. Anyway, the next part will be shorter and hopefully be out quicker. Thanks to T. H. for reminding me to limit Ranko's power level. (Read Shikima Interface. It's delightfully twisted.) Sent questions, comments, suggestions, etc. Avoid flames, though, because they will only encourage me. I'll start the next part after I get some feedback on this one. Speaking of which: Next episode: Kasumii said she wanted Ranko to help Ranma adjust to his curse. But would she approve of Ranko's hands on approach. What happens when you put two aquatransexuals in a hotel room together? See you next time for 'Three Nights'.
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