Conversations
Seven.
That's the number of times I've walked over to my computer,
turned it on, and started dialing his number before losing my
confidence and turning it back off again.
He must think I'm a prank caller.
'C'mon, Misty,' I say to myself. 'You'll have to do it sooner
or later. You'll have to find out once and for all. Just do it.'
Sighing, I turn my computer on.
As it boots up, I run through my mind what I should say. 'I
know this is kind of a random question, but is there anything between
you two...?'
'What were you and Yellow talking about the other day?'
'Are you in love with Yellow, Red?'
I dial his number and bite my nails as it rings. Bad habit, but
at least it keeps me from reaching over and turning the machine off.
His face appears on the screen. "Hello?"
I'm too nervous!
*CLICK*
I disconnect.
Next thing I know, my head is in my arms on my keyboard. I'm
such a coward.
I can't ask him. I just can't. I'll have to ask *her.*
I dial Yellow's number, but now I'm even more nervous. Why are
my palms sweating like this? When she answers the ringing, my mind goes
blank.
"Hello? Miss Misty! Hi!" she exclaims.
"Um." 'What was I going to say?"
Yellow's smiling face turns into one of confusion. "Are you all
right?"
"Um. Yes. I'm fine. Yellow, I have something to ask you..."
She nods. "Yeah?"
I clench my fists and stare down at the keyboard. Maybe if I
pretend I'm talking to myself, it'll be easier. "Are you in love with
Red?"
A long moment passes. I look up at her, and she's blushing.
"Yellow?"
"Why do you want to know something like that?"
"Because... because I..." Because I love Red, don't I?
That's why I got so upset seeing the two of them talking
and laughing together so comfortably, isn't it? But now that I think
that to myself, I realise that that can't be it. I don't feel...
*anything* for Red.
Then what...
"Miss Misty, are *you* in love with Red?" she mumbles.
"Because, you know, I wouldn't want to take him from you or anything, I
just..."
"No!" I burst out. "I'm not! At least, I don't *think* I am...
oh, I don't know, Yellow! I'm confused."
"I do like Red," she says. "I don't think he likes me that way,
though. I think he just sees me as a friend. A male friend."
I just nod. "Oh..." Somehow, the knowledge that Red doesn't
like her *that* way doesn't do anything to calm my heart. Something is
wrong. Something is very wrong.
"Miss Misty, what's the matter?"
I'm trying to think. Why can it be that I got so upset seeing
the two of them like that if I don't love Red? Why am I upset knowing
she loves Red, even though he doesn't love her? My eyes squeezed shut,
I search my mind for a reason, but I can't find one. What logical
reason could there be for...
Heh. Logic. As if 'love' is ever 'logical.'
"I'm in love," I simply reply. "I thought I was in love with
Red, but I'm not. I know I'm in love, but I can't figure out with who."
She glances downward, biting her lip. "Is it me?"
I choke on my breath. For a moment I can't even form words in
my mind, there's just this feeling of overwhelming realisation.
"Miss Misty?"
I disconnect.
For a few moments I simply stare at the screen, trying to
comprehend it all.
I redial, willing myself not to chicken out again.
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