“Tonight you will feel love.”
Natsuki's eyebrow twitched uncontrollably as she read the note that had been stuck to her bathroom mirror when she woke up this morning. Damn that woman!
She hadn't thought to fear her birthday, but perhaps she should have, given Shizuru's behavior since the Carnival ended. Ever since she'd admitted that she could accept Shizuru's feelings towards her, the demoness had started pushing the limits of acceptance to their very limits. Surprising her with a hug on occasion was bad enough – at least Natsuki could justify that it was alright between close friends in any case, so she didn't have to sort out the intricacies of her own feelings – but soon even that didn't satisfy Shizuru.
It wasn't long before Natsuki found Shizuru walking in on her in the shower of her own dorm-room to start bathing alongside her as if nothing were strange about that. As soon as she convinced Shizuru not to do that, she walked back into her room to find mistletoe strung up above the doorway with Shizuru waiting beside it. She protested that it didn't count as it wasn't Christmas, but Shizuru wasn't prepared to back down until Natsuki's entire body was covered in a blush from the stretch.
Eventually Shizuru offered a compromise: She just wanted to hold Natsuki. Grateful for any way out, Natsuki had accepted, only to find herself in the closest and most intimate embrace she'd ever been in. Shizuru had been so tender in it that her love seemed to seep out, and it was stirring uncomfortable things in Natsuki's stomach, and soon through the rest of her body. Shizuru's hands had even dared to creep down to Natsuki's butt, first simply cupping it but then copping a good feel. Natsuki had tried to protest – not very strongly, given the state of her body and the fact that, despite herself, it did feel good – but Shizuru had simply replied, “Natsuki said I could her, and that's what I'm doing.”
When she was finally released, Shizuru said her farewells for the day before Natsuki could say or do anything in response. She struggled to her bed where she collapsed as she waited for her body's reaction to fade away, cursing the woman that could make her feel such things. The thought to tell Shizuru to cut it out crossed her mind, but this just prompted a pain to pop up in her heart telling her that she didn't really want this. Her body was officially rebelling against her mind now, and it liked what Shizuru was doing to it, even if her mind was still terrified of contemplating where things might go.
Shizuru had let up after that incident and for the past couple of weeks. Natsuki had first thought that perhaps Shizuru had thought she'd gone too far and was backing off, but her playful attitude when they met up made this seem unlikely. Natsuki soon got an inkling that Shizuru was planning something big to top her last act, and she began to dread it whenever she had a spare moment to think. At least, her mind was dreading. Her body was still in rebellion, and whenever she thought about things it seemed to have the same reaction that it did when Shizuru was “holding” her.
Natsuki hadn't been expecting Shizuru to strike on her birthday, but she should have been prepared for it. And it seemed that Shizuru was going quite far indeed. “Feel love” - what did that mean? Was Shizuru planning to... to...
Natsuki gulped in fear for her body's fate and her mind's innocent. Would Shizuru really do that? She'd surely stop if Natsuki told her to, but knowing Shizuru, she'd probably end up in such a state that she couldn't. What if she even started to want it?
No! No... No? Natsuki shook those rebellious thoughts out of her head. She couldn't go down that road. She needed to be in control of her body, not the other way around. Even if it might feel good and help settle all the uncomfortable feelings in her chest... Gah! Stop it already!
Natsuki let out a sigh of relief as she returned to her room without incident. She'd opened the door cautiously, making sure Shizuru wasn't ready to ambush her inside, but fortunately she wasn't there. That was a definite relief then, as once inside she could barricade the door and only let Shizuru in after she was forced to knock. There was no way that woman was taking her by- “Ah!”
Natsuki stumbled forward under the weight of the woman who'd glomped onto her back from seeming invisibility in the hallway. “Happy birthday, Natsuki!” Shizuru said in a lilting voice right next to Natsuki's ear. She followed this up with a quick kiss and then blew lightly into it, prompting a wave of shivers through the poor girl's body. While Natsuki was still stunned, Shizuru let go of her and turned around to close and lock the door behind the two.
“Shizuru...” Natsuki said nervously as she turned around. This was bad. Shizuru had gotten the advantage of her, and if she let her, Shizuru would soon be taking advantage of her. “Um, we can't...” Natsuki tried to articulate the words to tell Shizuru that they couldn't go through with this, but she made the critical mistake of looking up into the woman's eyes. The sight of them, looking at her so lovingly, made her pause in her sentence as warmth shot through her chest. Her body was telling her that that sentence would be a lie. They certainly could do that... her mind just wasn't sure it was ready. She had to be in love first. But wait, she did love Shizuru, just not that way... necessarily. Maybe.
Natsuki was brought out of her turmoil by the feeling of a finger below her chin, tilting her head up slightly. Her eyes focused to find Shizuru's face just an inch away from hers. When the woman saw she was focusing, she said, “Now Natsuki, it's time for your present. If you don't want it – don't want me – just say 'No.'”
Natsuki opened her mouth. This was her chance. She had to speak to get out of this. Just one word. N-oh. Just bring her tongue to the top of her mouth, then form the O sound as she curled it away, and this would all be over. She wouldn't have to fear for her innocence anymore. Shizuru would understand, or she wouldn't have given her the option. She didn't have to let Shizuru do this to her. She could stop this.
So why didn't she? Natsuki's mouth drifted closed, and she resignedly closed her eyes as well. A comforting warmth filled her cheeks as her mind surrendered to her body in today's war. She was under Shizuru's spell. If Shizuru could do this to her, maybe it was love she felt... in the same way Shizuru felt it.
A hand came around to cradle the back of Natsuki's head, and she instinctively tilted it to the right. The next thing she felt was a delicious softness against her lips. Shizuru kissed her slowly and sweetly, causing a torrent of sensations to rush through Natsuki's body. The chaos that usually occupied her mind when she thought of Shizuru had surrendered to her baser instincts. She only cared about feeling Shizuru's lips against hers... feeling her body being pulled in to press up against Shizuru's... being held by her friend as they shared their first kiss outside the chaos of the Carnival.
Natsuki had no real idea how she was supposed to kiss, but her instincts seemed to have taken over. She moved her lips slowly and tenderly against Shizuru's, forging a bond between them. That's what this was: a bond. It was love. She loved Shizuru. She was in love with Shizuru.
Her mental barrier against the prospect of love finally shattered, Natsuki felt herself crumbling emotionally. It was a good thing Shizuru was holding her so tightly, or she might have fallen to the floor. Even so, she couldn't completely contain herself. Tears leaked from her eyes and mingled with their lips as they poured down her face. She even started sobbing into the kiss. Shizuru made an effort to pull away, probably out of concern, but Natsuki was having none of it. She held Shizuru against her, feeling her love's lips with her own. Shizuru had broken her down after so much effort; she couldn't back out from the kiss now.
Content that Natsuki was just crying tears of joy, Shizuru slowly walked the girl backwards as they continued their kiss. When Natsuki's feet bumped up against her futon, she and Shizuru slowly kneeled down to the floor. Natsuki was expecting Shizuru to take her all the way now and had resigned herself to it, even if her heart had already had enough for the day, but that wasn't Shizuru's plan. When they reached the floor, Shizuru gently pulled back from the kiss, coming to a seat across from Natsuki.
“Happy birthday, Natsuki,” she said. “I hope you enjoy your present.” Shizuru then gave Natsuki a soft and sweet smile. Her own eyes seemed to sparkle back at her, as if tears were welling up in them as well.
“Present...?” Natsuki said. She was still in a bit of a trance from the kiss, and her mind was reeling. Wasn't Shizuru going to do more to her? No, wait... “Feel love...” Natsuki brought a hand up to her chest, feeling her rapidly beating heart. So that was what Shizuru meant. It was probably all her plan to make Natsuki think it was so much more so that she'd end up breaking and have to face her true emotions.
Natsuki let her head fall forward, closed her eyes, and let out a soft sigh. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to be in a relationship with someone who knew her so well. Ah well, here goes... “I love you, Shizuru,” she said.
“I know,” Shizuru said. Her voice was soft, but there was a delicate edge to it, as if she were holding back all her own emotions. “And I'm glad Natsuki finally realizes this as well. I love you too, Natsuki.”
Natsuki smiled upon hearing Shizuru's confession. There was that warmth again... and an uncomfortable feeling in her body that made her wish Shizuru was closer... was touching her. Taking a deep breath, Natsuki decided to ally her mind and body. If her body wanted Shizuru closer, well then... “Shizuru...” she said. Emotions were starting to well up again, threatening to bring another wave of tears to her eyes, but she didn't care. “Come here. There's no way I'm letting you stop at one kiss, especially on my birthday.”