Frozen (part 85 of 100)

a Final Fantasy 8 fanfiction by Chendzeea Li

Back to Part 84
Pain and Confusion

 

During the night, as she lay, watching Fujin, her love, trapped in fate 
that should've been her own. Tossed unwillingly into a deep, dark well 
of dreamless nights that seemed to go on forever. It was more than 
Quistis could bear and she cried herself to sleep with Fujin, at her 
side. The dreams that came were welcome, and of an easier time. It was 
no small wonder that she cherished them, for they were but a brief 
respite from the madness of reality. Six months, that’s how long they 
said she'd been gone. To say it was hard to comprehend would have been 
the grossest of understatements. Not even to mention the absurd cruelty 
of their present situation.

Sensing movement nearby, she stirred. As her vision cleared she knew the 
horrors of the previous night were no nightmare as she had hoped. Locks 
of white hair obscuring her vision and the absence of an eye were proof 
that she still inhabited Fujin's form. Pursing her lips, she blew the 
hair away then gasped in surprise as a pair of crystal blue eyes met her 
gaze.

*******************************

Kadowaki walked quietly towards the clinic, her mind swamped with worry. 
She sighed in slight dismay as she rounded the corner and found Nicole 
and Zell perched outside the front door.

"I'm going out on a limb and assume that everything is okay. I mean, 
considering there were no late night calls." He said in greeting.

"Hello Zell." Kadowaki sighed.

"Sorry to be here to early Doctor. We're just worried is all." Nicole 
apologized meekly.

"They are both fine and stable." Kadowaki explained.

"Great news, can we see them? I don't suppose Quistis is awake is she?" 
Zell asked hopefully.

"I...well...." Kadowaki stammered, at a loss. Instead of trying to 
answer, she simply unlocked the door and walked in. Zell squeezed in 
after her and was nearly bursting with wonder as she switched on the 
lights. Nicole took him by the hand and whispered in his ear.

"Calm down, I'm sure everything is fine."

"Well, doc!?" Zell asked again.

"Zell, truthfully, it's hard to explain, I wouldn't even know were to 
begin." Kadowaki said in gently exasperation.

"Aw doc, something is up I can tell, you look like your about ready to 
faint."

"Zell, don't pressure her, perhaps we should come back later." Nicole 
said gently.

"That would be for the best..." Kadowaki started, and then all eyes 
turned as the door to Quistis' room opened slightly.

Fujin stuck her head out and looked around. Upon seeing Zell she 
tottered out of the room on shaky legs and rushed towards him.

"ZELL!" She squealed cheerfully, embracing him. Zell nearly fell 
backwards in surprise as she collided with him. Nicole looked on in 
wide-eyed wonder then was promptly grabbed into the hug as well.

"Oh my!" Nicole giggled nervously, while Zell only managed a startled 
"Whoa!"

"I'm so glad to see you!" Fujin babbled then coughed violently.

"Quistis." Kadowaki said sternly, rubbing her head.

"SORRY." Fujin winced. "IT'S WONDERFUL!"

"Wha!?" Zell blinked, as an overwhelming confusion overtook him.

"Fujin?" Nicole frowned, concerned about the sudden change in demeanor.

"Hush." Kadowaki said to the two as she turned Fujin to face her.

"Quistis, are you okay?"

"Um doc..." Zell mumbled, scratching his head.

"SHE'S AWAKE!" Fujin shouted, managing to hop up and down excitedly.

Zell was looking frightened now, and was seriously beginning to think he 
was still asleep.

Kadowaki's eyes lit up and she giggled brightly.

"Fujin's awake!? Is she coherent, I mean, oh my!"

Fujin nodded brightly, then led her to the room.

"Doc!?" Zell mumbled again, while Nicole just watched helplessly.

The trio entered the room to find Quistis sitting up, propped by pillows 
and looking at them curiously.

Zell screamed joyously and threw his arms wide, smacking Kadowaki and 
Nicole in face as he did so.

"You're awake!" He shouted, then rushed forward to hug her.

Fujin giggled brightly while coughing into her hand while Kadowaki and 
Nicole exchanged glances.

As soon as Zell threw his arms around Quistis' neck he knew something 
was amiss, she gurgled and made sputtering, angry noises, while trying 
feebly push him away.

"Oh dear." Kadowaki blinked. "Zell, perhaps that’s not such a good 
idea."

"BEHAVE." Fujin coughed, wagging a finger at Quistis.

"Okay, what the heck is going on." Nicole finally blurted fed up with 
being clueless on whatever weirdness was going on.

"Yo, Miss Trepe, what's the deal?"

"Kadowaki, please explain." Fujin said, wincing and rubbing her throat.

"They're mixed." Kadowaki shrugged.

"Do what?" Zell blinked.

"Switched, somehow Ellone...switched them." Kadowaki said awkwardly, not 
sure if there was any easier way to explain it.

"Bull crap." Zell laughed, punching Fujin in the shoulder playfully. 
"This is some kind of joke. Since Quisty is awake right." He chuckled.

"THAT HURT!" Fujin cried out, rubbing her arm ruefully.

"Okay, it's true." Zell mumbled, gawking at her as he sat down on the 
edge of the bed.

"Are you for real?" Nicole asked in disbelief, looking at the two women 
in wonder. The annoyed look on Quistis' face was pure Fujin and there 
was no discounting the truth. "Oh Hyne..." She gasped. "This is real."

"We have to get Ellone..." Zell mumbled. "She's gotta fix this."

"Quistis, when did she wake up?" Kadowaki asked.

"Not too long ago." Quistis hacked wetly.

"That’s gross, are you okay?" Zell asked worriedly. Quistis nodded, 
struggling to catch her breath.

"Fujin, how do you feel?" Kadowaki asked, checking the medical readouts 
by the bed.

"Fine..." Fujin wheezed, her voice barely audible.

"Good, good, rest easy, don't try to do anything strenuous, you could 
throw yourself into shock."

"Hungry..."

"I'd imagine so. You...I mean, Quistis has been fed with an IV for the 
last six months. I'll bring you something, but you're going to have to 
start small, ice cream and such."

Fujin nodded and rested back amid the pillows, the simple act of sitting 
up, even propped, was tiring.

"I'm sorry..." Quistis said regretfully, moving to her side.

"not fault..." Fujin smiled warmly.

"At least, you're both alive and well." Nicole smiled optimistically. 
"Surely, all we have to do is get Ellone down here and put things 
right."

"You make it sound so easy." Zell said guardedly.

**********************

"This is my fault..." Ellone cried as she and Nicole hurried up the hall 
towards the clinic. "Someone should've told me last night!"

"You needed the rest and no, it's not you're fault. You saved Quistis, 
that’s all that matters."

"No, Fujin saved Quistis, I only made a mess of things."

"Ellone, calm down, everyone is okay, it's just a mix up."

"Just a mix up!?" Ellone shrieked in dismay. "It's not, just a mix up!? 
I could have very well ruined two peoples lives!"

"Ellone, please, without you're help Quistis would have died, and..." 
Nicole added in a grim whisper. "and... I'm sure Fujin would have joined 
her..."

"I..."

"It'll be okay."

"But..."

"No buts." Nicole grinned. "I have faith in you, we all do, you can fix 
this."

"Oh Nicole, I don't even know what I did, so how can I even hope to fix 
it."

"We'll figure something out, now come on, everyone is waiting for you."

"Gee, no pressure or anything."

"You'll do fine, now come on."

When they arrived at the clinic Ellone looked faint as a small sea of 
eyes looking at her expectantly. All of Fujin and Quistis' friends and 
associates were present in the lobby, except of course for the 
honeymooners who were still absent from Balamb.

"News travels fast around here." Nicole offered apologetically.

"You, can, fix them right...?" Seifer asked sternly, staring down at 
her.

"Back off." Zell growled, elbowing him away and making a path so that 
she could make her way to where Kadowaki waited.

"How are you?" The doctor asked calmly.

"Um... nervous." Ellone gulped, hearing the murmurs and whispers from 
the gathered crowd.

"I'm sorry about all of this, they refused to leave, they're all curious 
and worried."

"It's Miss Trepe and Fujin I'm worried about." Zell interjected. "It's 
like they're freak of the week or something."

"Let's just do this." Ellone mumbled.

"Very well." Kadowaki smiled softly, opening the door to Quistis' room.

"You can do it child. We have faith in you." Cid said warmly as she went 
entered.

Inside the room, Fujin sat on the side of the bed making a stuffed mog 
dance about with childish glee in a merry attempt to make Quistis laugh. 
Ellone looked briefly confused; and then remembered that the two women 
had switched bodies, so it was in fact Quistis that was trying to make 
Fujin smile. However seeing Fujin, if even just her body, act in such a 
manner was downright bizarre.

"SMILE." Quistis barked with a grin, slowly getting the hang of talking 
in Fu's body.

"making me look foolish." Fujin mumbled, trying her best not to grin.

Quistis' got a mischievous look on her face.

"FOOLISH?" She giggled.

"don't." Fujin said firmly, though still in weak whisper.

"DON'T WHAT? THIS?" Quistis said, grinning mischievously. Fujin watched 
in indignant horror as Quistis started making faces that was more the 
providence of a kindergartner than a grown woman, much less one of 
Fujin's demeanor.

Ellone couldn't resist laughing at the site and startled the both of 
them.

"OH HYNE!" Quistis stammered, startled.

"wonderful..." Fujin groaned, closing her eyes, her face growing flush 
with embarrassment.

"Sorry to interrupt." Ellone smiled self-consciously.

"YOU'RE ALWAYS WELCOME..." Quistis grinned, coughing slightly.

"Um...thanks." Ellone mumbled, wringing her hands in worry. "Oh wow..." 
She gasped fretfully. "I did this... oh this is so messed up.... I'm so 
sorry you guys...."

"EASY, EASY." Quistis frowned, getting up to comfort her. "MY THANKS."

"For what... I ruined everything?"

"Not true, saved us." Fujin smiled faintly from her bed.

"Oh Fujin, look at you, I mean..." Ellone started in confusion, looking 
between the two women. "Oh, what have I done!"

"ELLONE." Quistis said firmly, grasping her arms.

"Quisty I'm sorry..."

"NO APOLOGIES."

"But..."

"You did what you must." Fujin whispered.

"SHE'S RIGHT."

"But look at you two." Ellone cried.

"We're just glad to be ali...." Quistis started normally, but her throat 
seized and she started hacking anew.

"Quisty!?" Ellone whimpered worriedly.

"Careful!" Fujin grumbled.

"HOW DO YOU!?" Quistis squawked hoarsely, looking at Fujin in wonder.

"Practice..." Fujin sighed then looked at Ellone questioningly. "Can 
fix?"

"I... I don't know..."

"TRY?" Quistis asked.

"But what if I fail...?"

"THEN FAIL." Quistis smiled.

"We move on." Fujin added with a shrug.

"You two seem oddly at ease with this." Ellone said with a concerned 
frown.

"Maddening actually." Fujin sighed.

"VERY." Quistis admitted.

"But I get ice cream." Fujin added coyly.

Quistis gave her a withering look then smiled cutely. She was thrilled 
to see her again, even if it was under such odd circumstances. Fujin too 
grinned, just happy that they both lived, and if they were fated to stay 
switched, then she would accept it happily, for at least they'd be 
together.

"Where's the guardians!?" Ellone squeaked, having forgotten about them 
in the confusion.

"HERE." Quistis smiled, tapping her temple.

"Thank goodness, when are you letting them free?"

"WAITING FOR YOU." Quistis explained.

"Just in case they were needed." Fujin added.

"Oh..." Ellone said quietly while thinking to herself. "I don't think 
they're a factor, so go ahead and let them loose."

Quistis nodded and concentrated. An aura of white light shimmered about 
her slightly and one by one translucent images of the guardians drifted 
from her as if made of smoke. The guardians looked as they one did, 
beautiful and whole, not the nightmarish horror's that had attacked 
Fujin in Quistis' mind. As the last of them faded, Quistis staggered 
slightly then looked up.

"WHOA." She gasped, clutching her chest stunned.

"Pandemonia." Fujin nodded. "Strong bond, takes a lot when leaves."

"I SEE." Quistis breathed.

"Well, what now." Ellone asked.

"READY."

"I'm worried though... Fujin, are you strong enough for this?"

"I Fine." Fujin said with a firm whisper.

"What did Kadowaki say?" Ellone asked, still unconvinced.

"I Fine." Fujin reiterated.

"BETTER THAN I WAS." Quistis shrugged.

"Huh?" Ellone blinked.

"MENTAL STRESS."

"What do you mean?"

"DOC!" Quistis sighed, knocking on the door to signal Kadowaki.

"Yes?" Kadowaki said, peeking in, how's it going?"

"Ellone worried." Fujin grumbled.

"I would imagine so."

"Are you sure, they're strong enough for this?" Ellone asked.

"Oh now you ask me." Kadowaki said bitingly causing Ellone to sulk 
visibly. Realizing she was being harsher than needed, Kadowaki softened 
into a smile then regarded the mind switched patients.

"Fujin's body is strong, Quistis seems alert and besides some 
awkwardness and slightly abnormal readings she's fine. As for Fujin, 
she's doing well, in fact, I was looking over the readouts and I think 
she may well be better able to handle the psychic stresses you're 
procedure is likely to cause, which is good, considering the weakened 
state Quistis' body and mind is in.

"I'M OKAY." Quistis protested.

"Yes, somewhat, but you've been through a lot, with Fujin inhabiting 
you're body like she is she's able to lessen the stress you're body is 
feeling.

"IF SAY SO."

"I don't get it." Fujin frowned.

"YOU'RE HARD HEADED." Quistis elaborated.

Fujin scowled and rolled her eyes.

"So you think it's okay for me to try?" Ellone asked.

"Assuming it's no worse than last time." Kadowaki sighed, holding up a 
medical chart. "Then yes."

"There you go..." Fujin said calmly, looking at the shaken girl.

"Okay..." Ellone nodded. "I will try."

**************************

"Strange friends." Jaya mused quietly as everyone sat clustered in the 
waiting room.

"It's always something, never a dull moment." Zell sighed.

"You sound like you don't like it. Used to be a time you were bouncin 
off the walls for adventure ya know." Raijin commented.

"Yeah, well things change, so do people." Zell said dully.

"Yes they do." Raijin smiled, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Here." Seifer said offering them both a cup of coffee.

"Thanks dude." Zell nodded as did Raijin.

"Going to be a long day eh?" Seifer asked as he sat down heavily.

"Been a long night." Raijin huffed.

"He has not slept." Jaya frowned. "His sister, he is worried."

"We all are." Zell added.

"Yo Seifer." Raijin asked, not wanting to be at the center of attention. 
"So what's with you and this girl? I hear you two getting close ya 
know."

"Who?" Zell blinked in surprise, looking up. "Celest!?"

"Ugh..." Seifer groaned rubbing his forehead.

"Oh, oh." Raijin winced.

"Say something wrong?" Jaya asked.

"No." Seifer sighed. "We're cool, it's not what you think." Seifer said 
quietly.

"She likes you dude, better not hurt her." Zell scowled.

"Look, I ain't out to hurt anybody, she's on the ropes or something. 
She's just looking for attention." Seifer explained.

"This girl, you do not like her?" Jaya asked curiously.

"Eh..." Seifer shrugged. "It's not like that. She's a good kid and all. 
Fun, cute, nice...but..." He trailed off.

"But what?" Zell asked, truly intrigued, but more so by Seifer's sudden 
candidness.

"Ah hell. Look Wuss, you and I both know I ain't no good for her, or any 
body." Seifer said with a startling bluntness.

"Harsh of you." Jaya frowned.

"It's the truth." Seifer grinned. "Ask you're boyfriend."

"I got no beef with you anymore Seifer. The past is the past ya know." 
Raijin said dully, sipping his coffee. "But if you think you'd hurt the 
girl, then leave her be. It's easy as that ya know."

"I tried."

"She's snagged ya." Zell nodded knowingly.

"I don't know what to say, I mean, I'm trying to be nice."

"That’s a scary thought." Zell mumbled earning a look of disapproval 
from Jaya.

"Hey, I'm not completely heartless." Seifer frowned. "The girls hurting, 
thinking no one wants her. Hell, I'd take her in a heartbeat under 
different circumstances, but...we know all know what would happen."

"Look, dude, I'm not approving of this or nothing but, I didn't see you 
worrying about all this sorta stuff when you was after Fujin."

"What!?" Raijin stiffened.

"Thanks...." Seifer groaned, giving Zell a foul look.

"Calm down dude, it's nothing major." Zell assured Raijin.

"Yeah, well." Seifer said firmly, sitting up straight. "She gave me a 
lot to think about."

"So what now?" Jaya asked. "This girl, she will not like being toyed 
with, either her be with her as she wants or leave her be."

"Oh man, you don't know Celest." Zell frowned. "She'd have a fit; she's 
already been turned down by every guy she's liked since coming here."

"Ouch." Raijin frowned.

"Yeah, she's scrapping the bottom of the barrel now." Zell grinned, 
taking a verbal jab at Seifer.

"You guys aren't helping." Seifer scowled bitterly.

"Well, you have to do something ya know." Raijin said in a matter of 
fact tone.

"Look, enough about me alright. What about Fujin!?" Seifer snapped, 
growing flustered.

"Ellone's taking care of it, now calm down." Zell grumbled.

"You're too angry." Jaya said calmly to Seifer.

"Who asked you?" Seifer growled.

"Hey, watch it. We don't want it getting ugly in here ya know." Raijin 
said dangerously.

"Boys, boys." Jaya sighed, shaking her head while rising to her feet. 
"I'm going to sit with the ladies."

"Okay." Rajin nodded as she left.

"Interesting gal." Zell mused.

"Very." Seifer added.

"Yeah, she's something else." Raijin admitted, watching her leave.

"Where the hell did you find her anyway?" Seifer asked. "I don't 
recognize the accent."

"Long story, suffice to say she comes from a line of nomads." Raijin 
explained.

"You mean bums." Seifer corrected him with feigned innocence.

"Dude, they're called gypsies." Zell winced, noting Raijin's growing 
anger.

"Sorry." Seifer chuckled.

"Don't." Raijin warned him.

"Aw come on." Seifer groaned, leaning back in his seat. "I was kidding 
man, relax."

"Hey, where's that Miguel guy, he's her brother right?" Zell asked, 
hoping to alleviate the tension by changing the subject.

"Who knows." Raijin grinned. "He's um, a charmer, ya know."

"Oh is that what they call it now." Seifer laughed.

"Huh?" Zell frowned, feeling left out."

"Womanizer, to be blunt." Seifer said slyly. "But you wouldn't know 
about that now would ya Mr. Pure heart."

"He's a player!? Miguel!?" Zell gawked. "He seemed so...ya know?"

"Um well sorta." Raijin mumbled. "He believes in uh, sharing the love ya 
know."

"Quit trying to sugar coat it." Seifer laughed aloud.

"Anyway..." Raijin grumbled. "Last I seen him was last night. He was 
walking up the hall with Miss Everson."

"That battle axe!?" Zell gawked.

"She's still teaching here!?" Seifer frowned.

"Yup, and she's just as mean as ever. Rumor has it that she was after 
Miss Trepe big time over the whole Fujin thing." Zell said in a 
scandalous whisper.

"Now this is pathetic." Xu snapped, announcing herself.

"Oh hell." Seifer groaned.

"We're all worried sick, so I come to check on you guys and I find you 
gabbing on like a bunch of old hens. You all should be ashamed of 
yourselves!" Xu blurted in disbelief

"Hey now." Zell frowned at her. "We were just talking."

"Yeah, whatever."

"Lay off." Seifer said in a bored tone. "You're worried, so don't take 
it on us."

Xu bristled but remained silent then turned as the door to Quistis room 
opened and Kadowaki exited with a grim look on her face.

"Well?" Cid asked worriedly.

Ellone exited behind her looking downcast and defeated.

"I'm sorry..." She mumbled.

"What!?" Zell paled.

"What does that mean?" Xu frowned. "What do you mean, sorry?"

"I couldn't switch them back..." Ellone whispered, prompting a 
collective cry of dismay from those present.

"Crap, well are they okay!?" Zell blurted.

"They're fine." Kadowaki assured him. "Just resting, it was hard on 
them."

"Oh my." Cid murmured, looking worried.

"Oh hell no." Seifer blurted, jumping to his feet. "You get back in 
there and try again!" He shouted.

"Whoa! Dude!" Zell gasped, intercepting him.

Ellone flinched and staggered back, moving reflexively behind Cid.

"I'm sorry." She whimpered.

"Sorry?" Xu frowned. "Ellone, is there nothing you can do, I mean, I 
hate to agree with Seifer...but can't you try again?"

"I don't know what else to do..."

"Damn it! You did this, make it right!" Seifer snapped as Raijin moved 
to help Zell contain him.

"I tried!" Ellone screamed in dismay, startling Cid and silencing 
everyone.

"I really did!" She sobbed. "This wasn't supposed to happen, I never 
asked for any of this!"

"Ellone, you did this, surely you can fix it. You just need to calm down 
ya know." Raijin offered.

"Calm down, how can I calm down with all of you yelling at me! All I 
ever wanted was to be normal... to be left alone. But no, it's always 
Ellone, you have to do this! Ellone you have to be that! Have any of you 
ever once considered what I've had to go through! I lost my parents; I 
lost my childhood, my freedom! All my life it's been this way. I've been 
told what to do, when to do it!" She cried out in a burst of pent-up 
emotion. "It's like I'm some kind of object, to be used, it's all anyone 
wants from me! Ellone do this, Ellone do that... damn it... I'm human 
too I can't do everything."

"Ellone, child, calm down, please." Cid murmured, moving to comfort her.

"No!" She cried out, moving away from him. "I'm tired of being hounded; 
I'm tired of being used by everyone! I want to help Quistis and Fujin 
just as much as any of you, but you have to understand! I'm not a 
machine that can be used then ignored. I have feelings too and I want to 
be treated as such!"

"Ellone..." Zell sighed sadly.

"I don't want to hear it Zell. You all claim to be my friends, but when 
have any of you ever visited me, or called to say hello."

"Hey now we..." Zell started then frowned as Nicole shook her head 
sadly.

"Right...only when you need something..." Ellone sniffed.

"I tried...." She whimpered again, her voice breaking as she sobbed 
openly.

"Ellone, that’s not true, I talk to you all the time." Cid said quietly.

Ellone turned on him tears in her eyes. "Oh, sir, don't give me that, 
you call Laguna." She said sadly. "You're like an uncle to me, but 
you're his friend not mine. All of them though." She sniffed, looking 
out at the grim faces staring back at her. "They can't be bothered with 
me unless there's some kind of disaster present...even my own brother 
can't be bothered with me." She added quietly.

"Selfish little thing." Seifer grumbled earning a rough shove from 
Raijin.

Ellone shook her head and sighed, her shoulders slumping weakly.

"Don't get me wrong." She finally sighed, looking at them in misery. 
"I'm not mad at any of you, but I wanted you to know, know what I was 
feeling for once, if that sounds selfish then good, then you know how it 
feels for once." She sniffed, wiping her eyes as she straightened. "I've 
done what I could. I really did but I have to rest, and so do they." She 
said bitterly while pushing through the throng of people. "Now if you 
excuse me, I'm going back to my room. Don't worry though." She added 
cynically. "I'll do what I need to, to fix this, then I'll leave and you 
can get back to your lives."

With that, she stormed out of the clinic, leaving everyone in stunned 
silence.
 

Onwards to Part 86


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