Bubblegum Crisis: April Fool

a Bubblegum Crisis fanfiction by Baka Gaijin30

The mission had ended about an hour ago. Linna, Priss and Nene had taken 
Sylia up on her offer for a drink at her bar. Sylia and Linna both 
noticed Priss was drinking way more than she should. Nene was nervously 
looking down at the ground.

"Uh, Priss?"

"What do you want?" she snapped at the blond.

"I... I'm really sorry about screwing up back there like that, I..."

"Sorry? You're sorry? Hey, Linna, Sylia, you both hear that? She's sorry 
she nearly got me and Linna decapitated by that rogue boomer out there. 
Well, I'll agree with you there; you are sorry. You're just about the 
sorriest, most useless fighter I've ever met!"

Nene looked down dejected at that.

"Priss," Linna broke in, "There's no call for that. She made a simple 
mistake. Everything worked out."

"Linna, you're not the one who's been covering her ass every mission for 
the last eight months! I am!" she said, taking another swig of her beer. 
Linna knew there were two types of drunks; the silly drunk and the angry 
drunk. Linna was getting a look at just what kind Priss was.

"Priss, that's enough!" Sylia broke in. "Nene, don't listen to her, 
she's had too much to..."

"No, it's alright." Nene sighed. "She's right. I can't fight."

"Nene..." Linna said, "Please, it's okay. Don't let her get to you."

"Linna, stop standing up for her! She..."

"Shut up, Priss. You're drunk, and you're pissing everyone off." Linna 
said, surprising everyone in the room, herself included. They were all 
waiting for Priss to take a swing at her, or to at least verbally strike 
back. Instead, she just looked down at her drink.

"Sylia," she said in a low voice, "can I stay here tonight. I don't 
think I should be trying to go home tonight."

Sylia nodded, "Actually, maybe you should all stay here tonight. Can you 
make it to the bedroom down the hall?"

Priss tried to get out of the barstool and nearly fell over.

"I think... I think I'm going to need some help."

Nene, still sulking, looked up to see a calendar on the wall behind 
Sylia's mini bar. March thirty-first. That would make tomorrow April 
first. April Fools Day. Hmmm...

A dark, evil thought entered Nene then and there. Priss thought she was 
so damn great. Nene decided it was high time she got knocked down a peg.

"I'll take her." she offered. "It's the least I can do, after screwing 
up so bad."

Before Linna or Sylia could object, she had Priss' arm around her 
shoulder and was leading her to a spare room.

Priss passed out the moment she hit the bed. Nene double checked to make 
sure she was really out, and then quickly undressed her. She then went 
into an adjacent guest room with an alarm clock, set it for seven in the 
morning, and smiled to herself as she lay down in the bed.

---The Next Morning---

Nene, having been woke up by her alarm clock a short time earlier, now 
slowly crept into Priss room. She knew she'd be out on her own until at 
least eleven if not later, what with all the beers she'd consumed. Nene 
smiled as she heard Priss snoring loudly. 'This is going to be great!' 
she thought, as she began taking off all her clothes. She then slowly 
and cautiously slid into bed behind Priss, who was sleeping in a fetal 
position on her side. "Yuck, she smells like a brewery." she thought. 
She steeled up her courage, kissed Priss on the cheek, then very quickly 
lay down, pretending to be asleep.

------

Priss slowly opened her eyes, and immediately regretted it. The 
throbbing in her head was terrible. She couldn't remember much about 
last night, but she could tell just from the signals her head and 
stomach were sending her that she'd had too much to drink. Sleepily, she 
felt the silken sheets against her skin and realized Sylia must've let 
her crash at her place last night. In fact, now that the thought about 
it, she could feel the silken sheets against all of her skin.

"Wait a second," she thought, "where the hell are my clothes?" She was 
sleeping on her right side, and as she started to turn around in bed, 
she suddenly realized someone's body was lying up against hers. 
Frightened, she looked under the covers. Sure enough, there was a 
woman's arm draped across her midsection.

That shocked her fully awake. Her mind started racing as she desperately 
tried to remember the events of the previous night. She knew of two 
people who were actively interested in her. There was Leon, who was open 
about it and blunt. But he wasn't at Sylia's get together last night. 
Then there was Linna. Linna never came out and said it, but you'd have 
to be a moron not to see she had a huge crush on her. Priss looked 
again. Definitely a woman's arm. She began to sweat nervously at the 
implications. Knowing how shy and, well, mousy Linna could be around 
her, that probably would've left Priss the aggressor last night. Linna 
was a sensitive, vulnerable girl from the country. No matter what 
happened, she knew she had to handle this very, very delicately. Or at 
least as delicately as someone whose head felt like it was in a vice and 
whose stomach was doing loop-de-loops was capable of being. She 
carefully lifted the other person's arm and began to turn around, 
quickly trying to work out something to say in her head.

It took a few seconds for what had happened to register.

It wasn't Linna in bed with her.

It was Nene.

Priss' eyes bulged out of her head as she looked in horror at her bunk 
mate. She pulled the covers up with trembling hands. Sure enough, she 
was in her birthday suit too.

Nene, feeling the rush of cold, smiled, pretending to be just coming out 
of a deep sleep. "Morning hon." she said, trying as hard as she could to 
keep from laughing. She slowly opened her eyes, to see a very frightened 
looking Priss staring back at her. "Last night was wonderful, I... wait 
a minute! You're not Mackie! What's going on here?"

Priss lower jaw began to quiver. She tried to say something but the 
words wouldn't come out. She quickly started backing away from her 
fellow Knight Saber, and fell out of bed. Picking herself up, she 
grabbed her clothes and ran for the bathroom.

Nene quickly grabbed a pillow and covered her mouth to keep Priss from 
hearing her laughter. This was going better than she could've ever 
hoped. Five minutes later Priss, white as a ghost, came in. She saw the 
tears in Nene's eyes and, not knowing they were tears of laughter, began 
to feel horribly, terribly guilty.

Nene, for her part overjoyed her revenge was working out so well, 
decided to play it up just a bit longer before letting her off the hook.

"Why Priss! Taking advantage of a young girl when she's had one too 
many. There's a word for that, you know!"

Priss just stood there looking like a deer caught in the headlights. 
What had she done? She quickly grabbed her boots and ran out of the 
bedroom.

------

"Good morning Linna." Sylia said, sipping her tea and reading the 
morning paper Henderson had brought in. "Would you like me to get 
Henderson to fix you some breakfast?"

"No, thanks. Do you mind if I hang out until Priss wakes up?"

Sylia gave her a knowing look.

"No, not at all. She drank an awful lot, though. I'd be surprised if she 
woke up before ten."

"I know, it's just, well... Look, granted, Nene goofed up. And granted, 
it placed me and Priss in danger, but that's still no excuse for her 
going off on Nene like that."

"Oh. Is that what you want to talk to her about?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, I just thought..."

"Thought what?"

"Look, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out you like her, 
Linna. Just ask her out. What's the worst she can say? 'No?'"

Linna just stared at the leader of the Knight Sabers. Before she could 
formulate a response, she heard the sound of rapid footsteps coming down 
the hall from the guest bedrooms. Both she and Sylia looked to see a 
visibly shaken Priss running toward the elevator. She pushed the down 
button frantically over and over again, waiting for the door to open. 
Both Sylia and Linna worriedly started toward her.

"Priss?" Linna asked, "Priss, what's wrong?"

The elevator door opened and Priss hurriedly rushed in and hit the main 
floor button. As the doors were closing, she turned and looked Linna in 
the eyes just before burying her face in her hands.

"Oh shit." Linna whispered. Sylia was about to say something, when Nene 
bounced out of the same hallway Priss had just run from grinning from 
ear to ear.

"April Fools!" she shouted, waving her arms back and forth as she 
laughed. She then noticed Priss wasn't in the room, and the other two 
Knight Sabers were staring at her.

"Hey, where's Priss?" she asked disappointedly.

Linna slowly started walking toward her.

"She just left, Nene. She looked like she'd just seen a ghost."

Nene got a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"You mean, she doesn't know it was a joke?"

"Know _what_ was a joke?" Sylia demanded, as she strode over to where 
Nene was standing.

"Well, you see..." Nene timidly began.

------

Priss got on her bike and started the engine. She needed to think. 
Nene's words kept running through her head.

_Taking advantage of a girl when she's had too many_

_There's a word for that you know_

"What have I done?" she asked herself. Poor kid. From what she could 
remember, she'd been pretty hard on the girl after the mission. Hell, 
she hadn't screwed up that bad. It wasn't like she'd never screwed up 
before. Besides, her hardsuit hadn't even been designed for one-on-one 
fighting. For her to blow up at the little squirt, and then to...

Priss put her hand up to her head as the pounding in her skull 
continued. She suddenly realized that, while she had started up her 
bike, she'd been so busy thinking about what had happened that she had 
yet to pull away or go anywhere. She turned the engine off, put the 
kickstand back down and headed for the entrance. Someway, somehow, she 
had to rectify the situation. Not for Sylia or her precious Knight 
Sabers, but for the little blond haired girl who was eating her 
conscience apart.

------

"You what?" Sylia shrieked, shaking with rage.

"I didn't know she'd take it so seriously."

"Didn't know..." Linna was beside herself, "She looked at me, looked 
into my eyes before she left, Nene. I've never seen anyone look so 
horrible in my life. You've got her convinced she fucking raped you, you 
stupid..."

As the elevator door silently opened, Priss looked in to see Linna and 
Sylia shouting at Nene. She instantly became enraged.

"I swear," Sylia screamed at the now sobbing young woman, "If this 
causes the breakup of the Knight Sabers, I'll..."

"Leave her the fuck alone!" Priss shouted, causing herself to wince at 
the pain in her head. She strode into the room and put herself between 
Nene and the others.

"Priss," Sylia began, "I..."

"It's my fault, okay? I don't know what she told you, but I'm the one 
you should be yelling at, not her!" She then turned to Nene, "Nene, 
look, I know I'm probably the last person in the world you want to see 
right now, but..."

"Um, Priss..." Nene timidly said, trying to interrupt her.

"Nene, please, this is hard enough for me. I remember saying terrible 
things to you last night. I'm sorry. And then, for me to take you, when 
you had one too many, and..."

"You didn't." Nene said quickly.

"I... what?"

"Well, you see," Nene began, nervously twiddling her thumbs, "after you 
said those mean things to me, I kind of decided to teach you a little, 
um, lesson, you see. And today being April first and all, I um... April 
Fools." she said, smiling weakly.

Priss just stood there, staring at Nene for what seemed like an 
eternity. Then, slowly, her hands began to ball up into fists and her 
face turned red.

"April Fools? _April Fools!?!_ I'll give you a fucking April Fools, you 
little shit!" she screamed as Nene ran for her life down the hallway. 
Linna and Sylia ran after them.

"Priss, wait!" Linna yelled.

"Don't worry; I'll leave enough of her for identification purposes!" 
Priss yelled back.

"Don't you dare touch her!" Sylia shouted, "Not in my house!"

Nene ran into one of the guest rooms and locked the door behind her.

"You hear that Nene? Be a good little girl and come out, so I can 
strangle you in the parking lot!"

Linna had had enough.

"Priss, knock it off now, damn it!"

Priss looked at her, and quietly wondered when the hell Linna became so 
brave.

"Get away from me, Linna."

"It's your own fault!"

Priss now stared angrily at Linna. "What?"

"You treat her like shit. You always do. What, you didn't think she was 
ever going to get sick of that? Damn you! You can be one of the most 
obnoxious, irritable assholes; do you know that? Obviously not, or else 
you'd have more friends than just your stupid rock band. Oh wait, that's 
right, they just hang around you because you _pay_ them to!"

"What did you just say?" Priss said, her anger now shifting to the 
slightly older girl glaring back at her.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to try to be your friend?"

"Look country girl, I..."

"Fuck you Priscilla S. Asagiri!" she shouted at her. She then turned her 
back on her and stormed off.

By the time Priss had recovered her faculties enough to respond, Linna 
had already left.

---Three Nights Later---

The boomer they had just taken down was a tough one. Much like last 
time, Nene was next to useless out on the battlefield. Just like last 
time, Linna and Priss almost got clobbered because of her incompetence. 
In fact, almost everything was the same as last time, except Priss. She 
said nothing to anyone before the mission, just silently put her skin 
suit on, then her hard suit, and entered the launch bay. During the 
fighting, other than tactical commands, nothing.

Now, as she was pulling her legs out of her hard suit, she looked over 
at Nene, and began to slowly walk toward her. Nene looked over, and 
became very nervous. Linna, still in her hard suit, and Sylia likewise 
nervously started making their way over, hoping to intercept in case of 
trouble.

Priss looked at Nene, and sighed.

"You okay kid?"

Nene blinked. "Uh, yeah, I... I guess so."

Priss began to scratch the back of her neck.

"It wasn't your fault. There was a puddle of oil where you landed. 
Anyone would've slipped."

Linna and Sylia were now just as dumbfounded as Nene was.

"Yeah, um, thanks." Nene nervously said.

"Sure. Oh, one more thing."

"Yeah?" here it comes, she thought.

"I know... I know I can be a real asshole sometimes. I don't make 
friends easily. Damn, where I grew up, everyone had an ulterior motive 
for being nice to somebody." Priss was now standing with her hands on 
her hips, looking down at the ground, "But... but I'm willing to try 
harder, if you'll let me."

Nene very slowly began to smile.

"Okay." she said.

"It... it's not too late. Maybe you, me and Linna can go out and do 
something?"

"I wish I could, Priss. But I have to go to work early tomorrow 
morning."

"Okay." She then turned to Linna. "Do you have any plans?"

"_No!_" she said a bit too enthusiastically. Sylia began to chuckle.

"Great. Then get out of your hardsuit and we'll go out or something."

"Sure. Okay." Linna said, suddenly feeling butterflies in her stomach as 
Priss used the phrase "go out." She quickly slipped out of her hardsuit 
and grabbed her gym bag with her civilian clothes.

"Good. Oh, and Nene."

"Yeah?"

"No more pranks, okay?" Priss said, suddenly taking on a much more 
serious tone.

"No more, I promise. Believe me; I swear to God I learned my lesson!"

"Good. Because next time Linna and Sylia might not be around to prevent 
me from putting you in traction." she said. She then turned back to 
Linna.

"So, where do you want to go?"

"I don't know. Want to go catch a movie?"

Yeah. That sounds good.

As the elevator doors closed on the two of them, Sylia turned to Nene.

"You don't really have to go to work early tomorrow morning, do you?"

"No. But I figured after all the trouble I caused, giving the two of 
them a chance to be alone was the least I could do."

Sylia smiled at that, and both she and Nene entered the elevator 
together to head for the main floor.

The End.

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