"Daughter," Ra's al-Ghul said grandly as Talia descended the steps into the Lazarus Pit. "I'm so pleased you could be here for my ascension to the ranks of the true immortals."
"Father, we have important matters to . . ." Talia hesitated as she reached the bottom. "Isn't this a bit - elaborate?"
Unfortunately for Talia, her father had collected as many DEMON guards as the cavern could hold without intruding upon the grandiosity of the ceremony. Obviously he wanted witnesses to his greatness. Possibly it was also a precaution against League interference.
Vandal Savage, meanwhile, was in a less than comfortable situation. Ra's had suspended a metal platform over the Lazarus Pit with four chains attached to the ceiling. The only thing on the platform were two metal containers. Savage was contained within one of them, clasps holding down his wrists and ankles. The other was empty. A tube connected the two.
"I think the situation calls for it," her father said.
She approached the Pit and saw that the level of the liquid was unusually low. It was several feet below, in fact. "Wouldn't it have been easier to use a more convenient Pit?"
Ra's sighed. "My scientists tell me that they are unsure what effect the Pit will have when Mr. Savage and myself are lowered into it. There could be a backwash of some magnitude. I had to use a pit where there was less chance of my men being doused with an overflow of Lazarus material. We couldn't have thirty men running around in a fit of temporary insanity, could we?" he asked dryly.
"I suppose not," she agreed. "And the apparatus?"
"It's designed to transmit his immortality, just in case the Pit does not perform this function on its own. Now, what seems to be the emergency?"
Talia caught the look on Savage's face. He seemed supremely bored by the whole affair. "Father," she said, assuming an air of distress, "I have come to warn you. My beloved has deceived us both!"
Ra's looked befuddled. "The Detective? But I just spoke with him the other day, and he appeared - "
"It was a trick, Father," Talia told him urgently. "He wanted me to lower my defenses. Then, when he lured me to Gotham, he had me committed to the lunatic asylum!"
"He did WHAT?"
Off to the side, Savage chuckled.
Ubu strode over and backhanded him with his good arm. "You do not laugh in the presence of the Demon's Head unless given permission," he said angrily.
"Would-be immortals," Savage sneered. "Your 'Big Head' is a baby compared to me. He lacks the stature for such lofty ambitions."
"Ignore him," Ra's said coldly. "His braggadocio will fail him once his gift is mine. Why would the Detective do such a thing?" he added, mystified.
"He wanted your secrets, Father," Talia lied. "If I had not escaped, I am sure he would have tried to make me tell him of your plans for Vandal Savage."
"You have done well, my daughter," he replied, scowling. "And you left for Gotham less than two days ago. It must gall the Detective that you escaped so quickly."
Talia looked away. "Yes, well, that is the other thing."
"What other thing?"
"I had - help." She gestured to the guards waiting above them at the top of the stairs.
"Hey, a little assistance here?" Harley Quinn snapped as she struggled her way past the armed guards, trying to carry Poison Ivy in both arms. "Us decadent American women are too weak and defenseless to carry people by ourselves, you know."
Talia saw her father grow more confused. She couldn't blame him.
One of the guards finally took Ivy from Harley's arms. He and another guard followed Harley down.
"Nice place you got here. It's like the set of a movie!" Harley said brightly as she skipped down the steps. She reached the bottom and looked at Ra's. "Let me guess, Indiana Jones, right? Who's Mola Ram?"
"Harley," Talia said nervously, shepherding her over. "This is my father, the Demon's Head, Ra's al-Ghul."
"Pleased ta meetcha," Harley said, offering her hand.
Ra's looked at her hand as if he'd never seen one before.
"Don't worry, I left my joy buzzer at home," she added.
"Daughter?" Ra's asked.
"Father, this is Harley Quinn. Surely you've read of her."
"Ah . . . yes, I remember," he finally said. "You work for one of the Detective's enemies, the - Clown Prince?"
"That's my puddin'!" Harley squealed.
"Father," Talia quickly said, seeing that her father wasn't adjusting very well to Harley's personality. "She was confined to the asylum with me."
The look in his eye suggested he wasn't surprised.
"It was she who helped me escape. If she hadn't, who knows what might have happened?" Talia asked. "The Justice League could have been here hours ago."
"I see," he replied. "Well, Miss Quinn, I owe you my thanks. If there is some service I can provide . . ."
"Actually, Father, there is," Talia said carefully. She knew what his answer would be, and it wouldn't fit her plans even if he said "yes", but she had to sound like she meant it.
"You see, it's this woman," she continued, gesturing to Ivy. "She is Poison Ivy, another enemy of Beloved."
"I've read of her. Admirable goals," Ra's observed.
"And she's my bestest pal!" Harley told him.
"Er, yes," Talia said. "Ivy is in a coma. The doctors say she will never wake up. Harley insisted that if she was going to help me, I had to bring Ivy with us so she could be revived with one of the Lazarus Pits."
Her father stared at her. "My dear, this is most irregular. Normally these Pits are used only for myself and my family. Not just anyone can be allowed to use the Pits."
"Yes, I know," she said, "but I gave her my word. I need to repay my debt to her, Father. I realize we can't use this Pit right now - "
"Why not?" Harley retorted.
"Because I won't be able to use it for several hours at least," Ra's replied. "I'm sorry, daughter, but . . ."
"Father, please," Talia said. And she realized she meant it this time. This was her father, no matter what, and she needed him to show her that she mattered to him as a person, as a daughter, not just as the future mother of his heir. "Surely you can make one exception for me. I would never ask anything else of you again. Can't you just - bend the rules one time?"
He frowned at her, and for a moment she was sure he would raise his voice. Then he calmed himself. "I'm sure you would ask other things of me in the future," he said. "That's what happens when fathers indulge their daughters, is it not?"
She blinked. Could he have said no in a more condescending manner?
"That being said," Ra's went on, surprising her, "there is a matter of honor at stake. And she seems rather impatient. Let us compromise then. Miss Quinn, this Pit will not become available until tomorrow, if at all. Who knows what effect lowering Savage into it will have? However, I can have Ubu escort you by plane to the next closest Pit, where your friend can avail herself of its healing properties. Agreed?"
Talia was astonished, but Harley jumped up and down. "Oh boy, I'm gonna plotz!"
"Ubu."
"Revered One?"
"I will not be needing you again tonight. Please do as I have promised."
"Of course, Revered One." Ubu hesitated. "Where is the nearest Pit?"
"Southwest of Luxor," Ra's reminded him.
Talia's amazement grew. Southwest of Luxor? There was no Pit near there. Well, not unless you counted the ruins of Thoth Khepera's resting place. Her father had the collapsed temple blown up after the ancient demoness had tried to . . .
She looked into her father's eyes.
"I'm sure that Pit will do," he said.
Talia no longer felt any surprise. She only felt sadness. She had never meant anything at all.
"No," she replied, looking at the guard to her right. "I don't think it will."
"Huh?" Harley asked.
The guard Talia had spoken to raised his arm. It shot out several feet in length, grabbed the lever that controlled the lowering of the platform into the Pit, and broke it in two.
"What!" Ra's cried out.
The arm turned and clubbed the nearest DEMON soldier over the head with the broken shaft, sending him to the ground like a sack of flour, before retracting. "Mola Ram, heh heh," Clayface said as he morphed into his true form. "That was pretty funny, Harl."
The other guard who had come downstairs with Talia shoved Ivy back into Harley's arms. "Find her some cover!" J'onn told her, changing back into his Martian body.
"The Justice League!" Ra's gasped. He looked at Talia. "And so you betray me again, when I am about to gain everything!"
"You've never given me a good reason to do everything you say!" she screamed at him.
"Young lady, I am your FATHER!"
"Oh, for Pete's sake," Harley muttered as she turned to run. "What is this, the Donna Reed Show?"
Ubu came at them, roaring. He pulled his good arm back.
J'onn calmly phased out, allowing Ubu's fist to travel through his intangible body. As Ubu passed him, he grabbed Ra's servant and threw him into a group of men.
"KILL THEM ALL!" Ra's thundered as he moved backwards. "Except my daughter - I want her kneeling before me alive!"
"Thanks," Talia grumbled as she tackled one of his soldiers with a flying kick and, rising, grabbed up his ceremonial halberd. It was top-heavy, but she slammed it down on the rock bed, snapping the blade off. The staff would do fine.
Clayface just sneered as other soldiers began firing at him. The bullets either buried themselves in the mass of goo he called a body, or passed through and took off in random directions. One grazed Harley's arm and she squeaked, falling onto the floor and dropping Ivy. "Red!"
While J'onn, Talia, and Clayface began wading their way through a swarm of armed guards, Ubu made his way to the back of the Pit where he had left his things. Opening the case, he drew out the Lazarus Arm and carefully lowered his weak arm inside.
At the same time, Ra's stormed over to the nearby throne on which he had planned to be carried out. He took a scabbard that leaned on one arm and angrily drew the scimitar out. "I will not be denied, not even by you, Talia," he murmured. "I never thought you could outshame your half-brother Arkady."
Talia wasn't paying attention to this. She was outnumbered like the others, but her father's men were critically hampered by his instructions. They were trying to defeat her without killing her. Plus they were unused to attacking someone who they'd been programmed to obey, and this was causing them to pull their punches. She had no such problem. She buried her staff in one man's crotch, then pivoted and kicked another man in the jaw. "J'onn!" she called out.
"A little busy," he said. He was fighting six men at once, and even then he was slowly winning with a mixture of shapeshifting, strength, and mental attacks.
"How about we keep count like in Lord of the Rings?" Clayface suggested as he crushed a man's leg with a pincer-like hand, sending the man howling to the ground. "Whoever takes more guys out wins!”
"A fittingly callous idea from someone like you," J'onn muttered.
"Let Red go!"
Talia turned her head, hearing Harley shriek. She was several feet away, gesturing at a DEMON guard who had Ivy on her feet, his arm wrapped around her neck. His gun was to Ivy's head. She swept up a fallen handgun and came toward them.
"You care for this corpse?" the guard sneered at Harley.
"She's alive, you meanie!" Harley screamed back. "You can't hurt her, please!"
"I order you to put that woman down," Talia said coldly from behind, holding up the gun.
The guard turned halfway to look at her. "Daughter of the Revered One," he said anxiously. "Your father gave strict orders for your capture and the death of the infidels."
"I'll kill you if you don't."
"I'll kill her first!" he shot back.
"No, I will," Talia said. She lowered the gun and put a bullet in Ivy's heart.
"RED!" Harley wailed. "NO, NO YOU DIDN'T!"
The guard stared at Talia as Ivy's body slipped from his arm. "You - "
Talia swung her staff around and cracked him in the forehead. His eyes rolled into his sockets and he fell backwards.
Talia was unable to defend herself as Harley leapt on her, though. "YOU BITCH! HOW COULD YOU FUCKING DO THAT TO MY - "
"Damn it, Harley, keep it together!" Talia yelled. "It doesn't matter, remember! Just get her into the Lazarus Pit and she'll be fine!"
Harley blinked. "The - the Pit?" she asked, her voice suddenly small. "She'll be okay?"
Talia pushed her off. Harley had come almost completely unglued at the sight of Ivy's shooting. After the week she'd had, if anybody needed their hand held it was Talia! "I promise. But I'd suggest you hurry. If her body sits too long, there could be minor complications with the revival."
"Eep!" Harley said. She scrambled up and grabbed Ivy's body. Then she took her hands away. "There's so much blood!"
"Harley!"
"All right! If you say she'll be okay."
"She won't be, and neither will you, daughter."
Talia whirled around and brought her staff up in time, blocking the sword slash by her father that would have taken her arm off. Of course - just for stealing people lost their hands. "Why was I given a name if you were never going to use it, father?" she hissed. She glanced back at Harley. "Get her OUT of here!"
Harley nodded and took Ivy by the armpits, dragging her backwards.
"So some little fool does you a favor, and suddenly your loyalties to her exceed your duty to the father who raised you from when you were a baby," Ra's said icily.
Talia swung her staff at Ra's, and he blocked it imperfectly. From the look on his face, he didn't expect her to attack him.
To be honest, neither had she.
"We fools have to stick together," Talia told him. "I let you use me as you wished, just because you said so."
"Women who attempt to defy their place in life are the true fools," Ra's replied.
"Then why don't you try putting me back in mine?" Talia challenged.
Ra's didn't even think about it. He attacked.
"Come on, Red," Harley said, pulling Ivy onto the platform. "We'll just give you a nice mud bath, and you'll be good as new. I think." She let go of one arm and rubbed her eyes with her sleeve. If she wore face paint instead of a mask, her blubbering would have washed it all away by now! Of course, she'd stopped using paint a long time ago. One too many tantrums from Mistah J had convinced her of that.
"Oh, Red," Harley went on miserably as she began pulling her toward the receptacle in which Ra's was to have been laid for the immortality transfer. "What'll I do if you're not in Gotham with me? You wouldn't even be in this mess if it wasn't for me, the Bat said. Puddin' is right - I can't do nothing right."
As Harley, crying mess that she was, began struggling to get Ivy into the container, the man she hadn't even paid attention to was freeing himself. Ra's had imprisoned Vandal Savage inside solid metal clasps so he wouldn't come free if convulsions set in, but those wouldn't hold him forever. And the arrival of this motley crew of do-gooders had given him the time he needed. He didn't have superior strength, but he did have a resistance to pain and an impressive healing factor.
Gritting his teeth, he bent his arm fiercely and broke his right wrist. Then he yanked his arm hard twice, not even caring as the metal scraped skin and shattered the base of his thumb. Vandal waited not more than thirty seconds before his hand healed itself, allowing him to start opening his bonds. He glanced at the stupid crying girl. She was quite the soft-hearted ninny. She might make a good hostage.
"Okay, Red, comfy?" Harley asked once Ivy was securely inside the receptacle.
Harley noticed the bloodstain on Ivy's clothes had grown a lot bigger. "Oh, please, don't die so quick! She said there'd be minor complications!"
"Like this?" Vandal asked, grabbing her tassels and yanking her backwards.
"Hey!" Harley spun with the momentum and cracked him across the face with an open palm, making him let go. "Get yer own sidekick!"
"How about a kick over the side?" he suggested, now more interested in paying her back for the slap. He booted her solidly in the stomach with his foot. She skidded backwards and almost went off the platform and into the Pit, catching herself on one of the chains.
"Don't worry," Vandal told her as he approached. "I'm told you won't be dead for long down there."
Harley's eyes got round.
Across the cavern, Clayface and J'onn were mopping up the DEMON guards. Between Clayface's invulnerability to bullets and steel, and J'onn's ability to twist his body or become altogether intangible, the men had been unable to slow them down except by nature of the sheer number of attackers. "They may work for DEMON, but they fight like a bunch of fairies with harps," Clayface grumbled. "Hey, behind you!"
J'onn didn't even turn. He just altered his density and sank through the ground.
Once again Ubu found himself going right past his intended target, but this time he had options. He charged right ahead, changing his path slightly and angling toward Clayface. The Lazarus Arm was cocked back, a glowing, dripping golden fist poised.
"Oh, looky, a Golden Gloves winner," Clayface sneered. Then his smile faded. There was something radiating from the bald guy's arm that wasn't right.
"Ha!" Ubu snarled, swinging his fist down. Clayface pulled himself backwards, and the fist smashed directly into the ground at his "feet". There was a minor explosion and a backwash of energy, and Clayface was hit with a percussive wave, splashing him all over the wall behind him.
"Interesting," J'onn said.
Ubu turned in time to be rocked across the face by J'onn's fist. His Arm went off a second time as it went wide, blasting the ground next to the platform suspended over the Pit. The concussion and the rocks blown outwards sent the platform careening wildly out over the center of the Pit before smashing back. Vandal almost lost his footing, grabbing onto the container he'd been locked in before. Harley just shrieked and kept holding on.
The two chains that were suspending the platform closest to the edge of the Pit then snapped from the impact, causing the entire platform to pivot downwards so that it became totally vertical. One of the chains flew around and struck Savage across the side, causing him to lose his grip. He shouted as he slid down the platform and fell into the Pit. Ivy noiselessly slid right after him.
"IVY! SOMEONE HELP!" Harley screamed as the chain she was holding onto shrieked harshly, forced to support twice as much weight.
"Damn it, that fool girl is ruining everything!" Ra's snarled.
Talia's staff clubbed him across the back, and he lurched forward a step. "Everyone's just a title to you, aren't they?" she said to him. "Daughter, detective, Ubu. And now she's Fool. How lucky for her."
"I will not tolerate such defiance, not even from you!"
"I don't care!" she shot back. "And thank the heavens, I actually mean it!"
"Could you save it for family therapy because I need some HELP here!" Harley yelled.
The third chain snapped, and Harley cried out, her legs kicking uselessly.
And beneath her, the Lazarus Pit was starting to bubble energetically.
Clayface was just pulling himself together on the other side when he saw Harley's situation. "Hold on!" he told her, stretching out a large hand.
Just as it was reaching her, however, the last chain separated from the ceiling, and Harley shrieked as she plunged into the pit, Clayface's hand just missing. "Fuck!" the mutant swore.
"No!" J'onn said, diving for Ubu's feet. The larger man nimbly leapt aside, but J'onn just sank right through the ground and disappeared.
The Lazarus Pit seemed to be rising to meet the falling Harley just as J'onn emerged from one of the Pit walls, his body becoming solid again just in time for him to catch Harley and fly back out.
As they emerged from the Pit, Harley realized that the rising level of the Pit liquid hadn't been a trick of her vision. It really had been rising, and now it blew like a geyser. Everyone dove aside as a blast of Lazarus liquid rose almost up to the ceiling, pushing the fallen metal platform that had just begun to sink down high in the air. The heavy metal square spun like a disc before hooking aside and falling.
And Ra's was directly beneath it.
"No!" he said, impotently flinging up his hands.
"Father!" Talia shouted, but the platform crushed him. His sword skidded along the floor and knocked against her feet. She dropped her staff. "Father!"
"Revered One," Ubu whispered, stricken. He ran over to the platform and heaved it aside.
"But where's Red?" Harley asked anxiously, squinting her eyes through a rain of Lazarus droplets.
"She must still be down there," J'onn said.
"How are we going to get her out of there?" she whined.
"I expect there are ways."
"Look at it this way," Clayface said, coming over. "If she drowns, it'll just bring her back to life again."
She glared at him.
He chuckled nervously. "Heh heh, nothing like a good joke."
"Yeah. And that was nothing like a good joke!"
"Father," Talia said quietly as she took Ra's' hand. His body was broken beyond repair.
"Daughter," he rasped. "The Pit, quickly . . ."
"Vandal Savage and Poison Ivy have already fallen inside, father. The Pit will not be ready for some time."
"As soon as it is ready, I will put you in myself, Revered One!" Ubu assured him fervently.
Ra's coughed painfully. "Thank you, Ubu. You at least remain true."
Talia gasped, and then she clenched the hand that wasn't in her father's. Of course he had to have the last rejection.
Before she could speak again, he exhaled, and did not breathe again.
"The Demon's Head is dead," Ubu said quietly.
Talia looked at her father, then at him. "Long live the Demon's Head," she replied.
"Excuse me?"
"My father told you to obey my wishes if something happened to him," she reminded him.
"Yes, of course, daughter of - "
"No," Talia corrected him. "I will not be known as the daughter of the Demon's Head any longer. I AM the Demon's Head. Do you understand me?"
Ubu frowned. "Until he rises again, then yes. But he will - "
"No, he won't," she said. "My first order for you . . . as soon as possible, I want my father's body taken away." Talia looked Ubu directly in the eyes. "And cremated."
The servant gasped. "You cannot mean that."
"My father is dead," she said simply. "I will scatter his ashes when the time is proper."
"Talia?"
She looked up. "J'onn," she answered, relieved. "You're all right?"
"Yes, everyone is. Well, everyone except Poison Ivy," he amended himself. "She's still inside the Pit."
"She'll come out. Father always did."
"Ms. Talia, I must insist - "
"Do you, Ubu? Or do you remember your place?" she asked coldly. "Or perhaps you wish to challenge myself and the others?" She nodded toward J'onn and Clayface.
He looked conflicted.
"Ubu," she said. "You serve the name, not the man. I am Talia al-Ghul. So you serve me. Are we clear?"
Ubu stiffened. "Yes, Demon's Head."
"Talia?" J'onn asked. "What are you talking about?"
"The rules of succession," she said. Talia stood up. "See to the men, Ubu. They'll need medical care."
Ubu angrily turned and walked away.
"Whew," she said, rubbing her forehead. "Fighting's over," she explained. "Once they get it through their heads that I give the orders now that my father is dead, they'll stop making nuisances of themselves."
"Talia," J'onn responded. "Savage is down there too."
"I'm sure he'll show himself too."
"Yes, but they're both down there. At the same time. What if that means - "
Before J'onn could finish his thought, there was a whoosh that J'onn was quite familiar with. "You just missed it, Superman," he said.
Superman looked around as he floated above them. "Care to let the rest of the League in on what happened here?"
"Aw, hell, it's Mister Merit Badge himself."
"Hagen!" Talia snapped.
To be continued . . .