Story: Tea Leaves, Coffee Beans, and a Touch of Mint. (chapter 9)

Authors: Love-is-god

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Chapter 9

Haruka-chan,


Good morning. I woke early and decided to speak to a few of my instructors before class, so please don't worry about me being gone. I might not make the early meeting, but I will be at the later one.


-Yukino


"If it's not one thing it's another..."


The note with Yukino's precise, careful handwriting was unceremoniously dumped into the waste bin as Haruka set about her morning routine. Wanting to speak to a teacher Haruka could understand, but did she have to miss the meeting? This was not the way to get reorganized after an absence. For that very reason, it also struck her as being quite unlike the meek girl. Yukino, who's calling card in the past may well have been the presence of Suzushiro Haruka, slipping out in the dead of morning? It wasn't strange enough to be cause for concern though, right? Unless... Is she avoiding me? Haruka considered the notion for only a moment before dismissing it. Yukino had quite clearly stated her intentions regarding her mysterious problem, and that is all there was to it. Academics comes first for students. Quite responsible of her, really. Nothing I can do about it in any case. Haruka punctuated her rumination with a satisfied nod, though she felt generally irritated for the remainder of the morning, to the general dismay of the student body.


Yukino was entirely unaware of the trouble her actions would soon be visiting on the campus, though, as she plodded through the academy's many intersecting paths. Truthfully, she had planned on going to see her English teacher, to ask him about a peculiar point of grammar she'd had trouble while researching for an essay the previous week... but even she knew that was just an excuse. As if to belie the point, she continued to put one foot in front of the other with no destination. Today then, right? I'll do it... today? She focused on the statement, trying to will it into something reinforcing, rather than questioning. Why today? She had not a single idea why, but it seemed pointless to wait any longer. Haruka-chan's just going to keep getting further away if I wait. She couldn't continue as she had with her distant, one-sided yearning, that was clear. Even more clear was that she also could not merely "forget," or abandon her feelings, not without trying. She would not quit without giving her all; Haruka would expect no less of her. Haruka would do no less for her.


I've been living all this time on borrowed strength; Haruka-chan's strength. Yukino knew that, but also knew that she was a better person for Haruka's friendship. I've become braver and truer to my self, I know I have! But it's all been on loan. Watch me, Haruka-chan! I think today I can do it. I'm going to find you and tell you I love you. Things are different now, I’m different now, because of you.


And it really was different. Yukino thought of Haruka and, instead of seeing angry, accusing eyes, she saw that pure plea for trust, that gentle coaxing for the honesty they had always shared. She was still afraid of rejection, still faced the turmoil of not knowing what to say or when or how, or what to do if her world came crashing down around her ears, but that sort of worrying certainly had not helped her up until now. She was left with only one option: she would charge ahead with all the single-minded confidence of assured success ahead of her, like someone she knew, and see what happened.


BONG!


The solid, bronze tone of the clock tower's bell interrupted her epiphany and reminded her that it was time for class. While she guiltily remembered that other considerations awaited her attentions today--class, council work, and the like--Yukino was now confident that, even if she had to wait until the end of the day, she would finish what she had resolved to do. Feeling tonnes lighter, she startled a couple necking in the bushes as she let loose an uncharacteristic whoop of joy, just to hear the sound of her own determination.


**********************************************************************************


"The Kendo Club?"


"Yes, Suzushiro-san, the Kendo Club," Shizuru paused sipping her tea to calmly repeat herself. "In brief, it would appear that some individual forced entry to their dojo this past Monday evening." Setting her teacup down, Shizuru opened a drawer in her desk, pulled out a manila folder and pushed it slightly forward towards Haruka. How considerate, Shizuru thought to herself as she retrieved her cup, how very nice some people are, no? Ah, my Natsuki, you were saved a rather troublesome task.


"These documents reflect the statements given by those members that witnessed the state of the facility upon discovery, as well as the results of preliminary questioning that the Executive Team members undertook as per your regulations." Shizuru peppered her speech with all the manner of words that she knew would help lull Haruka into a sense of authoritarian familiarity. The girl across the desk opened the folder and scanned through the papers.


"This happened sometime between last night and this morning?" She finally asked.


"Correct. There is, unfortunately, no more-precise time frame available."


"There was nothing stolen?" Haruka asked, wanting to verify her cursory scan of the document.


"Nothing."


"All due respect, Miss President, but why has this been given to such a high-priority concern? Such actions are immoral for certain, but this level of focus is a bit much for some mud and wall scrawling. In fact, if this was so important, why wasn't I informed earlier, when it was first discovered?" Haruka didn't mention that she was also almost disappointed that there hadn't been a more threatening form of uncontrollable criminal activity in the absence of her lawful bulwark.


"Ah, you see, Haruka-san, it's not so much the perpetrators who are causing concern, but instead the 'victims,'" Reito spoke up for the first time, perhaps sensing Haruka's burgeoning irritation and believing that interaction with himself rather than the President might help calm her. "Captain Takeda informed us that some members of the Kendo Society appear a little too prideful, and have their own, very vocal ideas regarding 'justice' for the responsible party. Needless to say, these ideas are not the type academy would endorse, nor anything most parents would be pleased to hear of."


"Right, right," Haruka muttered. She was mildly surprised to hear of such restraint from Takeda. Then again, he had had his run-ins with the Executives before, and was a person that would be cautious of running afoul of her again. "We don't need a bunch of pumped-up vigilantes who carry their brains in their silly sticks running around messing things up." Haruka added, in her own thoroughly direct manner, to Reito's delicate discourse. "Names," she barked tersely.


"They should be included in the report," he said, gesturing to the folder in her hand. She thrust her hand behind her, apparently to an empty seat.


"Yukino, I need you to arrange a..." She progressed that far before she grasped the fact that nobody had taken the folder from her, then another few silent moments before remembering that there was nobody in the seat in which Yukino customarily placed herself. The other two shared a glance unbeknownst to her as Haruka turned to the empty desk for a moment.


"Ahem. That is, Reito-san, would you get passes out to those competitors that they may be excused from class prior to the lunch period, with instructions to come see me?" The lightest touch of redness on her cheeks and the sudden, stiff politeness to her tone were the only signs of Haruka's discomfiture, but that was enough for the two in the room who, apart from Yukino, were the only people who could lay any sort of claim to knowing Haruka well.


"My pleasure," Reito responded graciously. Glancing at his watch, he straightened from his reclining position against a table.


"I do believe we are done here, then, and I am sure that you're eager to get started," Shizuru said with a cheery smile. "Unless you have anything further to bring forward, Suzushiro-san?"


"Nothing." She answered distractedly, already contemplating the myriad things she planned to make her future captives aware of.


"Then let us be off." The Student Council President paused, "Oh, but when you do see Kikukawa-san next, might you please let her know that I wish to speak with her?" Shizuru said, as though an afterthought to the rest of the mornings' exchange.


"Sure thing," Haruka said immediately, and frowned. Her mind firmly wrenched away from thoughts of her suspects, to the still-nagging ones regarding her partner. Damn it, she cursed inwardly, sure that there was something deserving cursing. She stepped out the door hurriedly, suddenly unwilling to be in company longer than she had to be. She was halted by a touch on her shoulder a few paces down the hallway.


"Reito-san?"


"Haruka-san, I don't mean to delay you. I just wanted to, ah, talk to you; as a friend."


"About what?" Haruka said bluntly, putting hands impatiently on her hips.


"Specifically, this last weekend. Did anything, er... happen? To you?" Reito knew Shizuru well enough to know that something was in the works with the Executive partners', "errand," but Haruka wasn't showing any of the usual signs of having fallen for one of those machinations. She had been far too calm—-as calm as Haruka ever could be--while Reito had on more than one occasion seen her rendered to a near-inarticulate state by Shizuru and her manipulations. Shizuru always managed to be leave just enough clues for Haruka to know she has been intentionally outmaneuvered. There would be no fun in it for her, otherwise.


"I found out that the Bubuzuke woman would make a terrible travel agent," Haruka muttered, mostly to herself. This gave Reito even more doubts. Haruka certainly did not offer such light comments on the President's antics, and there must have been antics, though Reito felt doubts beginning to form.


"Other than that, everything went... it went, that's what it did," Haruka dropped her eyes, and Reito now had to somehow work out the Gordian Knot of a bashful Haruka before he could even think to unravel the rest of this mystery. "I think the time off did Yukino some good," Haruka spoke again, finishing her statement with the beginnings of a warm smile, but just as suddenly as this seldom-seen side of Haruka had surfaced, Reito watched it slide back beneath the waves her usual manner. She turned around abruptly and bid farewell in a more business-like manner: "Thanks for your concern, Reito-san, but we're doing fine. If you want the specifics, you can ask Fujino what happened, I told her all about it yesterday."



"I'm glad to hear," Reito finally said, raising his hands in surrender with a disarming grin. "I'll see you later then."


"Right. Goodbye, Reito-san."


He could only stand and watch the Executive Director walk off, a small but supposedly constant part of his world flipped over on end and rolling away.


"Perhaps I was premature when I said she would be 'cheerful,'" a murmur floated softly from behind him. Shizuru stood behind him, following the departing girl with an appraising eye.


"So, is the real Haruka-san still in Osaka somewhere?" Reito inquired with a forced chuckle.


"However," She continued, ignoring his question, "I would still say that your gentlemanly attentions are not needed. I repeat, Kanzaki-san, what kind of person do you take me for?" Her light chime-like laugh did little to clear the mood of the thoroughly confused young man as she walked away, leaving him baffled in the first-floor hallway.


**********************************************************************************


"Yukino-san!"


"Mmph, hi Mai-shan." Yukino replied from her desk, immobile and smothered by her friend's enthusiastic hug.


"It's so good to see you again. I was worried."


"Worried?" Yukino echoed, surprised. Mai nodded, looking sheepish now that Yukino had returned perfectly fine. A tad defensively, Mai filled her in on all of the mystery and speculation that had managed to follow her departure. Yukino was taken aback, she hadn't thought that so many people would really pay attention, aside from breathing a sigh of relief that Master Sergeant Haruka was away for a while. She also could hardly believe that Shizuru had not concocted some cover story for them, but who knows what might have been going on in that woman's head? Yukino had given up trying to figure that one out. She shunted those thoughts away as she listened to Mai list a few of the more wild rumors. Yukino smiled, she could not help it, knowing that the truth could have stood with them more than easily.


"Thanks for your concern, but Harada-san was right. Just a few... interesting happenings." Yukino couldn't quite bring herself to say "coincidences," it felt too much like a lie.


"See? Told you Mai-kun," Chie, who had been silent during Mai's rendition, said.


"Okay, okay, you were right, but I couldn't help but worry a little bit. Who knows what could have happened to her?"


"Oh, I get the feeling that she wouldn't have objected to a few thing that could have happened." Aoi replied glibly, drawing both Mai and Yukino's eyes to her. Aoi seemed oblivious to their stares, and Mai shrugged and turned away. Yukino's eyes lingered just a little bit longer, her patience rewarded when Aoi locked their eyes and winked, ever so slyly.


"Right, Yukino's certainly a capable girl," Chie added. "Especially with the Director there and all, even if something did come up they could handle it. Hey Yukino, what do you say? Were you capable with Suzushiro-san? Were you able to handle everything?" Yukino blinked, but shook her head. The weirdness of the past few days must suddenly be catching up with her, she decided. Shizuru has me jumping at shadows, doesn't she? I'm better than this.


"Ah...of course, we were able to take care of the few minor difficulties that came up," Yukino answered guardedly, looking between one far-too-knowledgeable grin to the other. A few minutes later as the tardy instructor brushed into the room and started class, much to Yukino's relief. She took the chance to rest her eyes and try to rationalize away her paranoia.


**********************************************************************************


Haruka thumbed through the files on the three boys she was about to meet with. She was waiting, already far longer than she should have had to, for them to arrive. The files were already worn and abused at the corners, a telling sign of how many times she'd been through them. The activity kept her mind alert and occupied, and now she could be pretty sure that she hadn't missed anything important. Fingers twitching impatiently, she grabbed at the folder, but the the door was thrown open as her hand closed over it. She turned sharply toward those who entered, the warning spark in her gaze going either unnoticed or unheeded. "To hold in esteem human courtesans," indeed! They need to look through their code again. Haruka frowned, too, at their dress: the three entered garbed in their padded uniforms, sticks, chestplates, and all. The only missing element was the face masks that may have served to ensure their fool, empty heads didn't float away, but the dolts probably thought they looked more dashing this way, or something. They knelt in the middle of the floor, ignoring the provided chairs.


"What, have you been in uniform all day?" She snapped, getting the conversation off to a cordial beginning.


"No, we have practice during lunch, and didn't want this little appointment to inconvenience us too much." So that explained why they were so late, crossing campus to their dorms to change. The nerve! Practice? Everybody else manages to get changed after class. Do they think this can intimidate me? She oriented on the boy in the middle--Daiki Watanabe, she identified by the picture in the report, she could not recall having had any need to see him before, surprisingly--who had spoken up.


"Do you know why you've been brought here today?" She asked, a dangerous gleam in her eyes. The tardiness, inappropriate dress, and flippant attitude were all things that Haruka had to deal with on a daily basis, but today she felt her temper rising all the quicker. She did not feel threatened of course--never, not Suzushiro Haruka!--but the three of them before her, arranged closely in their camaraderie, seemed to highlight the lack of personage in Haruka's own company, setting thoughts and feelings she had no business worrying about now to roiling in the back of her mind.


"What, did you lose our statements or something? Doesn't matter anyway, we'll have this finished before you can get your team off their lazy asses." Haruka's mind blanked on all her other concerns and she gaped for a long moment at the sheer audacity of this boy, hardly believing she had not had to deal with him before today. Things really have gotten out of hand without us here.


"No!" She answered, voice rising sharply. "I just wanted a follow-up interrogation, to make sure you didn't lie last time. I wasn't there this morning." She said, deliberately using the words "interrogation," and, "lie." She definitely did not want them used to considering themselves the untouchable victims in this case.


"Of course you weren't there this morning, probably had more important things to do. Powder your nose or something? And what do you mean by interr--" He began to reply scathingly, an indignant expression settled arrogantly across his brow. She slammed her hand startlingly hard into the desk and he twitched in surprise, silencing.


"Just a few questions, boys." She gritted her teeth, but refused to rise to the bait of his insults, not wanting to give Yukino reason to calm her down and bring her attention back to their purpose here.


"So, your dojo was the victim of some vandalism. Any idea why?"


"None," he started, surly as only a teenage boy just taken down a peg could be. "Just some idiot that thought, wrongly, they could get away with it."


"Of course they were 'wrong' if they think they can pull one over on me. Just answer the questions, I don't need your comments. Did any members recently have a confrontation with another student? Somebody try out for the team and not pass? Think carefully before you answer, don't underestimate how much the Executive arm knows! If I catch you in a lie..." Haruka narrowed her eyes, playing this bluff for all it was worth. Really, that would have been a good thing to look up before calling these three. It was not like her to have missed something so obvious, she always seemed to have every relevant scrap of information on hand, in the past...


Daiki took a deep breath before he answered, but there was not a trace of dishonesty about him as he said, "No."


Haruka blinked, getting her head back in her duty. "Good. Okay, the door. There was no sign of forced entry. Could this have been an inside job?"


"No! Director, there's no way that one of our--"


"Of course, of course," she waved his objection away, "But I didn't ask for your opinion. Just answer the question: are all of the keys are accounted for?"


"Yes."


"All right. Good job finally figuring out how 'questions' and 'answers' work, by the way," Haruka added with a touch of annoyed sarcasm. "That's about all for the crime."


The boys started to rise.


"That does not mean we're done here. Sit!" The two on the sides (the word "cronies" sprung to mind) looked to their leader, who shrugged and knelt back down.


"Now I need to ask you about something else, a wrong that hasn't happened yet. Do you all know what a vigilante is?" She saw Daiki's eyes tighten perceptively, but he and the others did not offer an answer. Haruka decided to help them.


"That would be some foolish person who, without access to all of the information, resources, experience, training, and discipline that the proper authorities do, thinks that he can go out and take the law into his own hands. In most cases, that ends up very badly for this person, one way or another. You wouldn't think that anybody you know would be so stupid as to attempt this dangerous practice, would you?" While in the midst of her explanation, she rose from her desk and circled it, so that she ended up directly in front of her guests at the end. Folding her arms and leaning back against the desk, she awaited the response that the boy's growing tension marked as inevitable.


"It's not stupid!" He shouted, leaping to his feet, "Somebody insulted our honor, the honor of our dojo, and the honor of our captain! Nobody but us has any claim to the person who defiled our ground, we can't trust you to yell your way through it." Well that was easy, Haruka thought with a touch of gratification, getting a confession was rarely so simple. Then, Daiki did himself a great disservice as he continued,


"If you were any good at your job, you would have been working on this when the rest of your team was. Where the hell were you when this was going on, in some cushy meeting, or were you still all cuddled up in bed?" He spat the words. This was the last straw for Haruka.


"What!? You consume to tell me what I need to be doing? You think that this school revolves around you and your ridiculous sport? You think your silly 'honor' has anything to do with this? This is an insult to me that the vandals would pull this stunt. Your captain agrees with me; he's certainly not supporting you foolishness. He would be the first one running around waving his stick if he thought this was a good idea. You do anything else in this rain of thought, and he's going to find out about it. If that doesn't dissuade you, vigilantism is also illegal, and I would be coming after you next. This is my responsibility, my job, and if you get in my way you'll find out firsthand why wrongdoers do not cross Suzushiro Haruka!" The last statement was hurled into the young man's face with as much force or more than the finger jabbed into his padded chest, enough force to bow him backward slightly. He had the misfortune to receive the brunt of her attention, but the other two had been forced to draw back slightly from her wildly sweeping gestures as well. She straightened up and folded her arms.


"After we're done here I'll be going to have a look at your little playhouse for myself, and my partner and I will have this wrapped up in no time. That is, unless we also have to keep an eye on a bunch of surly children who don't know how to do what they're told!" She fixed each of them with a glare.


Haruka was never the quietest person, and her voice had escalated true to form by the end of her speech. Her guests, who had started out sneering and indignant, had progressed through rage, nervousness, doubt, and finally a disgruntled acceptance tinged with worry. She turned and stomped back behind the desk. They took that to mean, correctly this time, that they were dismissed. As Daiki walked out the door and into safety, however, he just had to offer his opinions once more.


"Fine! We'll have a good laugh watching you try to figure this out! Come get us when you need somebody who can get something done."


"Sure, I'll get one of you when we need a thick skull to break through the vandal's door!" Haruka called after him. As soon as they left she sat back down, hard, and fumed for a minute. Then a smile broke through her thundercloud demeanor, though it broke more like a ferocious lightning bolt than a ray of sunshine. God, that felt good. They didn't have the guts to go up against me, they didn't. She reached a hand to the corner of her desk.


"So, Yukino, you ready to go..." She trailed off when her hand met nothing but air and polished wood. Where's my coff...? Oh. Where Yukino was, that was the real question, she was reminded. The thunderclouds faded to a light drizzle, and she sighed, feeling suddenly lonely. Haruka did not really like the feeling, nor the severe unfamiliarity of it. She rose and walked back to the council room next door, but the coffee pot was empty as well. As she should have known, as Yukino was the only one who ever made any, and she the only one who drank any. Irritated now, and not feeling like brewing it herself, she decided to take one last look through her report before heading over to the dojo. Upon not finding it, she quickly remembered that she had left it on the desk in the other room, but that didn't help her feel any less frazzled. She mentally slapped herself for not asking Reito to get a message out to Yukino, and added another slap for not doing so herself. She had never had to let her partner know things in such a way; Yukino was always there to know about the plans, and always there to keep a hot drink ready, and to oversee the little details, and sure to pick up anything she left behind...


Haruka sighed again, and it felt like all the energy she'd found after getting back to work was gone... just like Yukino... she shook her head furiously. Yukino wasn't gone, she was probably just out to lunch right now, given the time. I'll see her later at the after-school council meeting. She also debated going to get Yukino now, but could not see how to get past the little detail of not knowing where she was. By the time Haruka found her, it would probably already be time for the next class, so Haruka started out toward the crime scene alone.


**********************************************************************************


"The Kendo dojo?" Yukino repeated, puzzled. Aoi nodded an affirmative.


"Yes. You said you missed the council stuff this morning, so I thought I'd let you know. It looks like Suzushiro-san is doing some kind of investigation there right now."


"Thank you , Senou-san. I think I'd better go see her." Yukino had been thinking and stewing and rehearsing in every quiet moment that she'd had that day and, though not what she would call "fully prepared," it seemed that it was time to see Haruka again.


"Right. She could definitely use your help investigating; that's what I thought."


"What?" Yukino looked baffled for a moment, "Oh, yes, of course, investigation. That's why I need to get over there." Yukino amended, too quickly. Aoi smiled, and though it looked nothing more than an innocent expression of amusement, Yukino felt uneasy with it directed toward her. She had not forgotten Chie and Aoi's peculiar behavior from earlier. It was disconcerting to be the focus of those two.


"Better get over there, then." Yukino added unnecessarily, and hurried off. She turned her mind away from her two classmates as she walked, though could not help but wonder, too late, from whence Aoi's very specific knowledge had come. Her nerves had been jarring her since midday, and she felt she would be no more confident, likely less so, if she waited to see Haruka later today. She quickened, trying to outpace her uncertainties and reservations. She flowed through the throng of lunch-going students, making her way to the dojo as specified. As she passed the tennis courts, her heart leaped in her chest as she noticed the Kendo competitors practicing outside on a large spare mat.


There would be nobody else at the building. Haruka only likes to use the whole team for operations when that many people are needed. This building isn't so large that she will feel the need to drag out the cavalry. She always has preferred to do as much as she could with just the two of us. Yukino did wonder what might have happened to run the club outside, but that was secondary in her mind. She came up to the building, which looked sound on the outside, and entered.


Shortly thereafter, Haruka arrived.


"The area looks fine on the extortion, it appears that the defacing was all interior." She said to the air, as if expecting it to take careful note. She looked closely at the lock on her way in, noting that there were no fresh scratch-marks on the edges of the keyhole, as might have happened with an inexperienced or hasty lock picking. She strode in, and looked about. She first needed to find--


"Yukino?"


The young girl, standing in the center of the large training mat and gazing around at the floor and walls, looked up slowly. Calm, Yukino, take it easy, she told herself.


"Haruka-chan," She said conversationally, "somebody sure doesn't like the Kendo Club." The muddy shoe prints all over the floor and mat, rude drawings on the wall, and unflattering nicknames sketched on the nameplates were testament to that.


"I can't imagine why." Haruka muttered darkly, her conversation with the specimens of the club all-too fresh in mind.


"They don't seem to mind Takeda-san though, isn't that interesting?" Yukino continued in that same oddly dispassionate tone, absent even the curiosity with which she always pursued investigations. Haruka might not have though anything odd about the way she spoke, there was not anything that unusual about it in itself, not for a girl who freely admitted that her mind was occupied by a private difficulty. It was Yukino's countenance, something in her eyes, that captured more of Haruka's concern. She looked briefly to the side to follow Yukino's gaze, and noted somewhere in the back of her mind that, yes, his nameplate had escaped the attentions of the vandals. The only thing she was really thinking about then, though, was Yukino. Her partner's professed troubles, her disappearance today... and for that matter, her mysterious reappearance, here where Haruka could not have begun to expect seeing her.


"Uh, sure, that is odd. But how did you know I was going to be here?" That question among the others managed to win the race to her tongue.


"Senou-san told me about the investigation."


Haruka nodded. Senou and that other girl, Harada Chie, they certainly were well-informed, she thought dourly. Haruka and her partner stood, neither taking a step in any direction, unspeaking, nor even making a show of looking around in an investigative fashion. Haruka looked closer and found that despite her inexpressiveness and stillness, Yukino let off and aura of restlessness. Given time, Haruka thought Yukino would pluck up the courage to speak what was on her mind, but Haruka never felt she had enough time as it was. She took a few steps closer into the room.


"Your shoes, Haruka-chan." Yukino spoke up suddenly. Haruka froze with her foot poised just above the mat. She looked down and found Yukino's shoes neatly placed at the edge of the training area.


"Ah, thanks, Yukino." Haruka bent down to tug off her shoes. I can show some respect for this playpen, even if those boys couldn't manage the same to me. She stepped onto the mat now and directed her attention to Yukino. She opened her mouth once, shut it slowly, not sure what to say, then simply spoke what came to her lips as it came, all in a rush.


"Say, before we get started with the investigation, do you have anything else on your mind? No worries about putting a damper on our 'vacation' now. Nobody here but us, and the building isn't going to go anywhere." Haruka said it all quickly, but in that perceptively softer, compassionate tone Yukino heard only rarely. Yukino looked thoughtful.


She took a few steps of her own, bringing her face-to-face and scant inches from Haruka, close enough to feel uncomfortable to any but friends as close as they. She steeled her mind and started to draw upon all her careful rehearsing but discovered, to her chagrin, that she could not recall a thing. Everything from earlier in the day felt like it were years ago, another time, a long-forgotten time to the now that was so much more real, the now who was standing before her, chest rising and falling lightly, with a few stray golden strands hanging before her face. Yukino could have groaned with disappointment, she had hoped that she would not feel like this again, that she could just talk straightforwardly this time. Stoic and strong and standing upright, that is what she had imagined.


Yukino looked up at the concerned but softly encouraging violet eyes and all disappointment in herself fled her mind. She saw somewhat there that told her what to do with the kind of doubtless assurance the likes of with Yukino only thought she had felt before. What Haruka wanted right now was easy to see through those windows, the desire to know what was on Yukino's mind and in her heart. Yukino could not deny that request. She looked into those eyes, with that broad, furrowed brow atop, and let her vision linger over Haruka's strong features. Her gaze fell down and traced paths around Haruka's mouth and lips: pursed, expectant, waiting. Yukino's arms moved of their own volition. She placed her hands on Haruka's shoulders, her fingertips brushing the silky blond tresses undulating down Haruka's neck. She rose up only just slightly on her toes. Haruka always seemed so larger-than-life, but she really wasn't much taller than Yukino herself. Her face drew closer to Haruka's now-perplexed expression, but Yukino closed her eyes to that, blocking out everything but the feeling of her lips meeting Haruka's as she had dreamed so often. Haruka stiffened, and Yukino felt hands come up and grasp her upper arms with a painful tightness. Yukino managed to feel fatally foolish for just a second, but she pushed that aside, determined to get as much out of this kiss as she could, absolutely sure that those strong hands on her arms would be pushing her away any second, and would be then keeping her away for every long, lonely second of her life afterwards.


Haruka tried to piece together her suddenly fractured thoughts. She had entertained no idea of what was coming as Yukino's face had inched closer to hers, not until the intention had become crystal clear. She stiffened up, and her hands rose to grasp Yukino's arms in a strong grip. She could have sworn that she had originally been moving to push Yukino away in surprise, but there was something very... vulnerable-feeling in the arms she grasped. The light weight of her friend's hands laying on her shoulders was in some way pacifying. There was also something else, a sudden shallowness of breath, a rush of hot feeling through her body that sapped her resistance. So, Haruka did not push away. She did not do anything for a few long moments, she just took in the warmth and feeling of Yukino with the same rapt attention that she had prepared to listen to her words.


Yukino took a long time to realize this, she was so focused on remembering every sensation of what she thought to be her last moments ever this close to Haruka. She only noticed her expectations of abrupt resistance going unfulfilled when Haruka gently disengaged with a turn of her head. Haruka's eyes were closed, and her face expressionless; the only clue Yukino had to her feelings was a slight, painful discomfort as Haruka tightened her grip, but Yukino could not have said whether it was an intentional act or not.


Haruka was not harboring any far-fetched illusions of Yukino pulling some outlandish prank, or trying to make some extravagant point of discussion through her actions. The truth of that kiss, of the sound of Yukino's heavy breath, they left no room for the flights of fancy a pressured mind might otherwise concoct. It was no blankness of thought, though, so much as a clamoring, indecipherable conflict in Haruka's mind that kept her from expressing anything. Her usual reaction to sudden pressure: that loud, lashing, irrational anger she was so known for, clashed with the almost innate protectiveness and caring that she felt for her only real friend.


"Yukino." She was finally able to say, firmly, with the barest hint of gruffness on the tail end of the word. She spoke with the same tone of voice as she used when doing her utmost to be formal, forceful, serious and officious. It came naturally to her.


"Haruka-chan!" Yukino started anxiously, "I'm..." What? What am I, sorry? Yukino calmed herself, resigned to being responsible for what she had done. "I need to talk to you." Haruka's eyes finally opened now, but Yukino was disconcerted by how she seemed to be avoiding looking at her.


"There's more to say?" Haruka replied, her mouth setting into a thin line as her senses came more fully under her control. She didn't mean her words to sound that harsh, but to Yukino, the thinness to those lips looked far too grim. Haruka released her grip on Yukino's arms.


"I... I have plenty more I could say, Haruka-chan." Yukino answered cautiously. Gaining momentum, and feeling a strange irritation with Haruka's response so far, she continued, "Are you telling me that you can't think of something yourself?" Yukino finished, the slightly accusatory tone she used fully intentional. She did not know of any struggles Haruka might be having with her own emotions, all Yukino saw was her always temperamental friend hiding behind this unnaturally quiet front. She would have expected many things from Haruka; betrayal or anger, shock and confusion, but this officious calm was an unknown.


"Yukino, what could you possibly think that...." Haruka began to reply in that same tone, but paused, not entirely sure how to continue. Yukino did not notice the pause in the sudden flaring of her own temper and interjection.


"Thinking? What did I think about, Haruka-chan? Do you suppose I just sat down to lunch sometime last week and thought, 'Oh, I think it would be nice to fall in love with Haruka-chan, why don't I do that? I'll put it on my schedule this week.'" Haruka blinked as Yukino finished, showing her first

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