Chapter 7: Yomi-chan’s fragile heart
(Where Yomi tries to skip class ... and so does Yukari-sensei.)
" ... All right. How many times do I have to tell you three stooges to leave Sakaki out of your stupid schemes?"
"But, Mizuhara-san! They had ... I mean, Mihama-san was ... "
"I told you already ... Chiyo-chan has somehow the reputation of having the powers of ... um ... a Teruteru-bôzu good weather charm. Since class 1-2 is going to a field trip during the weekend, some girls asked Chiyo-chan to uh ... lend them her power so that it doesn’t rain. So they, umm, hung Chiyo-chan by her feet at the window ...
"All right, all right, it does sound crazy; but we used to do that too. And for some reason, it really does work."
"But it looked like ..."
"No, it was NOT a kidnapping! Didn’t you notice that she was surrounded only by harmless girls? Besides, why did you have to bring Sakaki? Couldn’t you have ‘saved’ Chiyo-chan yourself, Mr Big Bad Wrestler?"
"Well, that is ... "
"Admit it, you just wanted to watch Sakaki ‘kick ass’, didn’t you?"
I can’t believe that big oaf is actually blushing. How pathetic.
"On second thought, please don’t answer that. I’d rather not know about your weird fantasies. Now, if you would be so kind as to leave Sakaki alone, and go back to ... what you Yanki punks usually do ... swaggering around looking tough?"
"But ... Sakaki-sama is ... "
"You there, henchmen N°1 and 2! You look somewhat reasonable, why don’t you tell your boss to behave?"
"Actually, we have names! We are -- "
"Wow, Yomi-chan sure is good at scolding people!" says Osaka, "she makes a good Tsukkomi!"
"With all the Boke around here, there has to be at least one." I reply.
Speaking of Boke -- or Baka -- Tomo is absent today. She left a message on my cell-phone saying that she has caught a cold. Heh! I guess it’s like they say, only idiots catch colds on sunny days.
However, today I don’t feel that good myself, so maybe I shouldn’t talk. Although it doesn’t seem like a cold. Rather, I feel somewhat anxious ... and there’s a knot in my stomach. That’s strange, I wonder why ... I’m not dieting right now, since the disaster with that stupid American Atkins Diet Method ... hmpf, what a fraud!
Ah, the three hoodlums are finally leaving, looking depressed; good. Sakaki sure shows a lot of patience with them.
Sakaki ... quite an enigmatic girl. I thought I knew her, but ... Well, I thought she was just a normal girl, a little shy, with a somewhat intimidating appearance, but it looks like she does have a scary side after all.
I was quite surprised to see that she really had been practicing martial arts, like the rumors said. I thought she just did Chinese soft gymnastics or something. But what surprised me even more was the level she displayed. I mean, can a girl send someone like Ôyama flying for several meters and knock him out, with one push? I mean that overgrown idiot must weight at least 100 Kg!
Hmm, maybe she really comes from a samurai family and her father trains her in some kind of traditional bujutsu or something. She rarely talks about herself or her family, so it could be possible. Well, if that’s really the case, then she probably doesn’t enjoy it very much. Something tells me that she doesn’t like violence.
On the other hand, she was quite merciless with that Kojima freak ... Although he sure did deserve it. I mean, who else than a complete bastard would enjoy bullying someone like Chiyo-chan? And extorting money from the weak ... and grabbing girl’s chests? But still, breaking his hands was somewhat over the top!
I guess Sakaki is extremely slow to anger, but when you actually manage to provoke her wrath, then you’d better have spoken your prayers beforehand. Or be a very, VERY good runner.
Maybe she shouldn’t keep her frustrations inside her like that; she should show her anger more often. I mean, I get angry at Tomo all the time; if I had kept my annoyance and anger inside me, I’d probably have snapped and murdered that girl already.
Hmpf ... Tomo ... come on; how could she be ill on a day like this? I mean, she caught a cold, what, two times in the last five years? ... Damn, I really don’t feel good right now. Did that stupid girl give me her virus yesterday? Maybe I do have a fever ... My pulse is pretty quick.
Anyway Sakaki, a samurai ... heh, no wonder Kaorin admires her so much. She must like the "prince who sweeps you off your feet" type ... and since there’s no boy who can beat Sakaki’s level of "princely" ... Hehehe. Poor Kaorin; the most unlucky girl in the universe. Come to think of it, it sometimes looks like as if she’s really in love.
Ah well, you often see those kind of things in manga. it’s probably just a phase anyway. We have to raise kids and take care of a family after all. Although I still can’t imagine myself in that kind of ... um, marital situation.
Oh, speaking of being "in love" with Sakaki, Chiyo-chan has been acting totally smitten lately, always clinging at her side and giving her wide "puppy dog" eyes ... hehehehe, Chiyo-chan’s first love. Too cute for words. Well, thank God poor Chiyo-chan wasn’t traumatized during that incident. She is stronger than she looks. Anyway, she seems to trust Sakaki with her life now. Heh.
... Wait, there’s something even funnier. Kagura! I mean, the next day after the incident, when Ôyama and his henchmen were acting like Sakaki was some kind of Yakuza gang leader, Kagura approached Sakaki with wild and round eyes, started bowing repeatedly and shouting something like, "Sakaki-sama, I’m dreadfully sorry! I’ve always acted terribly disrespectful to you! Please forgive me! I will treat you with the respect you deserve from now on! I will know my place!" etc, etc ...
What a riot! Poor Sakaki was looking devastated! Anyway, I stopped that stupid bonkura from embarrassing herself any further with a good old Yomi-chop on her skull. Usually I reserve them for Tomo, but ... well it seemed to calm her down.
She then started to argue with Ôyama on who was the real "N°2" in school; her or him. Another chop put a stop to that too ... Well, in the end, things got back to normal. Somewhat.
Kagura doesn’t seem to challenge Sakaki any more to stupid contests, but on the other hand, she has gotten worse with the "You’re so cool, Sakaki!", "You’re a killer!", etc. And she’s always giving her those starry-eyed looks ... Wait! Does it mean that, she too, is ... hahahaha!
Wow, Sakaki is becoming a real Casanova! Maybe I should tell her that, to cheer her up ... but she’d probably not understand the joke. Sometimes, it seems to me that Sakaki is even more clueless than Osaka.
Anyway, that Kagura - Sakaki thing, it reminds me of those stupid shônen manga when the genki martial arts girls gets easily defeated by the hero, and she starts following him like a puppy dog. I always hated those kinds of stories, but in this particular case, it’s actually pretty funny!
Oh, it also does remind me of another manga. A shojô one, that Tomo gave me the other day. That’s right, Tomo actually gave me something without asking for anything in return! Well, she told me that some cousin had given her this manga as a gift for her birthday, but since she hated "mushy stuff", I could have it. Fitting for a "crying diet maiden", she added. Grrrr.
It’s a rather funny story about a short-haired tomboy being desperately in love with a quiet long-haired girl. The short-haired girl is always acting silly and embarrassing herself, trying to attract the other one’s attention. The mangaka managed to stretch that story for several volumes. Heh. This kind of situation, it’s exactly like ... Kagura and Sakaki! That’s just hilarious!
(Siiigh ... ) no matter how much I try to cheer myself up, I still can’t get rid of that knot in my stomach. I can’t seem to concentrate on Yukari-sensei’s class either. Her lessons are always quite lively, and I really like English, but today ...
Usually Tomo disrupts the class, and then Yukari-sensei uses her as the subject of English sentences to explain grammar, like °Tomo is stupid.° (Present), °Tomo is being stupid right now.° (Present Progressive), °Tomo has been stupid all her life.° (Present Perfect), °Will Tomo always be stupid?° (Future), etc.
Come to think of it, Yukari-sensei is in fact quite a good teacher!
Hmpf, what is Tomo thinking, anyway? I mean now that she has given me that manga, she is constantly asking me about it ... what volumes have I already read? Why do I like this stupid romantic stuff? How do I want the story to end? And so on.
Typical Tomo! I mean, she doesn’t like something, gives it to me, then suddenly decides she is really interested after all, and pesters me about it all the time.
I mean she did it again, just yesterday after class! So I told her that if she was sooo interested in knowing the conclusion of the story, then I could lend the manga to her. If she said "pretty please". Of course, she replied something insulting like "why would I want to read a stupid story a baka like you doesn’t even understand? Baka, baka, baka!"
Ooh, I was sooo furious! Like I wanted to hear THAT from her! I gripped her face to stretch her cheeks as usual, but then she stared up at me with that expression ... the one where she looks somehow like a happy child, with completely clueless eyes ... like she’s a totally innocent, gleeful little girl looking up at something in wonder.
What the hell IS she wondering anyway? "How far can I go to piss Yomi off?", "What am I going to say next?", "What is the meaning of life?", "Where am I right now?"
So I was standing there holding her face in my hands, and she was staring up at me, repeating "Baka, Baka, Baaakaaa ... " Her arms were hanging at her sides; she didn’t do anything to prevent me from hurting her.
Actually she even leaned her face further into my hands, with wider eyes, and called me a Baka even louder! It was like she was saying "I’m putting my face in your hands, you can do anything you wish to me, but no matter what you do, I’m still calling you a baka!"
Aaargh! I must have looked a madwoman myself at the moment, gaping like a fish, and staring at her with wild eyes ... I was starting to tremble, and held her face tighter ... my thumbs were pressing her cheeks on each side of her mouth. I remember feeling the fresh sensation of her skin inside my palms. Yes, the skin of her cheeks felt fresh, not warm as I had expected ... and it felt also very soft.
Well ... even though it’s Tomo we’re talking about, she is still a young girl, so it’s perfectly normal that the skin of her cheeks would be soft.
Anyway ... I leaned my own face towards her; trying to retort something, something at least more creative than "YOU are the baka here!", but it felt as if my vocal cords were blocked. I remember feeling a strange little shiver under the skin of my own face, a tingling sensation in my lips ... I had this urge, to ... I don’t know, maybe bite her or something!
Hmm, that’s not a bad idea, actually; next time she misbehaves, I’ll bite her. Perhaps in the neck. She’ll probably run around screaming that I’m a vampire ... heh.
(Sigh ... ) she drives me crazy.
How did it finish anyway? ... Well, suddenly she went completely limp and all the muscles in her face relaxed, giving her a totally blank expression. She lowered her head and was completely silent. I couldn’t see her eyes anymore. I was somewhat surprised and snapped out of my murderous trance. "Tomo?" I asked hesitantly.
"BAKA!" she abruptly screamed like a banshee; and I jumped back, startled. She is always loud, but when she decides to REALLY scream, then ... well I think she gave everybody a heart attack. Then she turned around, walked out of the classroom and went home, just like that. I mean, she didn’t even help us clean up the classroom! Who does she think she is? Cleaning up after class is mandatory! Is she becoming a delinquent?
Hmm, maybe she already had a fever at that moment. That would explain her incoherent actions. I bet she’s the type who doesn’t even realize she is sick and waits until she collapses to do something about it.
I hope it’s not too bad. I think I’ll visit her tonight and bring her today’s assignment ... Bah, she won’t do it anyway, and copy it from me in the morning, as usual. Maybe I should do her homework myself before I go see her. At least she won’t strain herself copying it frantically just before class ... It’s easy to imitate her horrible handwriting anyway.
Feh, why should I do that for her? It’s not like I care. I mean, if I really cared about her, I’d encourage her to study more and not spoil her like that. Still ... she IS sick, so maybe I’ll make an exception today.
Strange ... I’m looking at my hands ... if she really had a fever, her skin wouldn’t have felt so cool and smooth.
Oh, my hands are trembling. She has definitely given me that fever ... Ugh, I feel like shit! My forehead doesn’t seem hot though.
And there’s this weird sensation inside my ears ... it’s making me restless. It’s exactly what happens when I have spent an entire evening chatting with my friends, and then I go to bed. Even though I’m surrounded by silence, I can still hear bits of their voices inside my head, and I can’t sleep for a while. It feels the same right now ...
Aaaargh! Damn you Tomo! I’m so used to hearing her insane chatter all the time that it’s starting to disturb me when she’s not there! But ... it’s the first time I have felt that way! It’s usually not like that when I’m alone! Is it because I’ve associated her somehow with the classroom ambient noise? Or ... is it because I am worried about her? No way!
Maybe it’s because of that scene she made yesterday in front of the whole class? She made it look like I had been the one mean to her. How embarrassing. Ugh ... my stomach. The muscles of my belly have contracted and I can’t seem to relax them. Am ... am I having a nervous breakdown or something?
Tomo ... damn you to Hell for making me feel like that! Ha! See if I’m going to pay you a visit tonight! Instead, I’ll go to bed early, relax, and forget about all that. Oooh ... I want to lie down.
"Uhh ... Sensei? I’m not feeling very well right now ... Can I go to the infirmary?"
"You’re not feeling well, Yomi? Maybe you ought to go home immediately. Health is much more important than studies, my Granny used to say. Chiyo-suke, you go and help her walk home. It’s not like you need to hear about the Past Continuous Tense anyway; you already know eeeeverything about that, don’t you, Miss Bratty Genius?
" ... Oh wait, if Yomi collapses on school grounds, Chiyo-chan won’t be able to carry her; and if she dies, I’ll be responsible! Sakaki, you go with them ... there’s only fifteen minutes left, anyway. Oh, what the Hell. CLASS DISMISSED!"
Author's notes:
-- Teruteru-bôzu ("sunny sunny boy"): a good weather charm. It consists of a small, simple doll made by tying the middle of a cloth together to form a "head". It is hung up at the window to bring about good weather. It is typically used by children before a school trip. In a children's song, they threaten to cut its head off if it rains ... In the Azumanga manga, Chiyo told her classmates that she is a "sunny person", someone who brings good weather. As Osaka and Tomo wanted it to rain on the next day because they didn't feel like participating in the school marathon, they figured that if they hung Chiyo at the window upside-down it would bring about rain. Unfortunately, it was very sunny the next day ... therefore hanging Chiyo upside-down brings about good weather.
-- Tsukkomi, Boke and Manzai: Manzai is a type of stand-up comedy popular in Osaka; it involves two performers, a funny man, the Boke ("forgetful one"), and a straight man, the Tsukkomi ("the one who butts in") -- the latter's role is to bring out the comic qualities of his partner. Typically, the Boke acts stupid, so the Tsukkomi berates him and smacks him on the the head saying "Nande Yanen?" ("Why?" in Osakan dialect). --
Bujutsu: means "martial art" in Japanese. In Chinese, it would be "Wushu". In this chapter, Yomi assumes Sakaki is a practitioner of a "traditional Bujutsu", an "old" Japanese martial art from before the Meiji era (before 1868). Nowadays, those kinds of martial arts would be called Kobudo, Kobujutsu, or Koryu Bujutsu (all three meaning "old school martial art / way"). There used to be a lot of different martial art schools (called Ryu) in feudal Japan, where samurai learned all-around skills like kenjutsu (the art of the sword), yarijutsu (the art of the spear), jujutsu (hand-to-hand), etc. There are still quite a lot of surviving traditional Ryu in Japan; usually they are more focused on "combat efficiency" than more modern arts such as Karate or Judo. The most famous surviving Ryu is Katori Shintô Ryu.-- Genki: means "in good health", "lively", "energetic", etc. in Japanese.