Story: Three Years in Hell, A Lifetime of Pain (chapter 11)

Authors: BillGopher

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Chapter 11

[Author's notes: Nothing that I haven't said already.
Rating - R or MA or whatever it is now.

Feedback – most definitely wanted. Thoughts, suggestions, criticism, whatever. I can’t fix something if I don’t know it’s broken… You can reach me at


“When the world is darker than I can understand,
when nothing turns out the way I planned.
When the sky turns gray and there’s no end in sight,
I turn to you…”
“Turn To You”
--Melanie B

Chapter 11

3 Days Later…

Faith moved back to where she had left Beth hidden, the last few days they had kept moving east and away from the prison. She had wanted to put as much distance between it and them as possible. Faith wasn’t sure how, but Beth had managed to keep up with her despite the frantic pace she was setting. Exhaustion had finally overwhelmed Beth and Faith had been carrying her for the last few hours. Faith had finally spotted a house and left B hidden while she checked it out. The house had turned out to be abandoned for sometime, but it was what they needed for now, a place to rest…


Faith blinked and turned from the window and back towards the figure sleeping on the bed a few feet away. Frowning Faith moved thru the doorway to the kitchen. Inside, Faith grabbed a bowl from the counter and moved towards the sink, as she turned the water on the faucet coughed out a brown sludge before a brackish trickle of water drizzled out. [Merle lived in a better class of shit-hole than this!] Faith thought angrily. Dropping the bowl back onto the counter, Faith turned and looked inside the refrigerator, the light inside flickered twice before blinking out and a strong odor of rotting meat flowed out. Faith slammed the door quickly. [Damnit! We’re gonna have to move soon, we can’t stay here] Turning back to the faucet Faith waited several minutes for the water to clear before she filled the bowl and padded quietly back thru the small house.

Faith walked back into the bedroom with the large bowl of water and some towels. Putting them down on the dresser she walked over to Beth who was still asleep on the bed. [God she stinks! I wonder why I didn’t notice it before.] Gently, Faith put her hand on Beth’s shoulder when a strong hand reached up grabbing her and knocking her off-balance and she was tackled to the floor and held down. Faith lay still underneath Beth, “B it’s okay. It’s me, Faith. Listen to my voice B, you’re safe.” Faith gently ran her hand up and down Beth’s arm.

Beth leaned forward as she heard the voice, it was familiar somehow. She leaned close to the voice and sniffed the woman’s neck several times. She knew that smell!! “Mate?” Beth asked as the image of her tall, dark haired mate came to mind.

“Uh yeah B, it’s me. Faith.” [What is with the mate thing all the time? Did I miss something?] Faith wondered to herself.

Faith wriggled out from underneath Beth, “B, we need to get these rags off you okay?” Faith took the rags that were once a shirt on Beth’s shoulder and started to pull them off when she saw Beth smile widely at her.

“Mate want to play?” Beth grabbed the rags and started pulling them off of her.

Within moments Faith saw a naked Beth kneeling in front of her…”Uhhhhh B…uhhmm this is wash time. Not play time.” Faith managed to stammer out. Instead of being aroused by the sight of Beth being naked, Faith was shocked to her core by what she saw.
Leaning closer Faith moved Beth’s long hair gently aside and she saw the multitude of scars, burns and welt marks that criss-crossed Beth’s back, shoulders and stomach. [MOTHER OF GOD!! What did they do to you B?] Tears fell from her eyes as Faith saw the older scars underneath the half-healed new ones that covered Beth. Faith gingerly touched Beth’s left side where she saw a large, purplish area by Beth’s ribs and she was pretty certain that Beth had several broken ribs there as well.
Faith reached over and grabbed a wet cloth from the bowl, her hand shaking as she took the cloth and started to wash the layers of dirt off of B. Faith wiped her eyes with the back of her free hand.

Beth heard sad noises and felt her mate’s sadness wash over her. She reached out and touched her mate’s face and felt the tears on her cheeks. “Why mate cry? Do something bad we did? We hurt mate?”

Faith heard the hurt in Beth’s voice, “No B, you didn’t do anything bad. I just got something in my eye, k?” You stay still as you can while I clean you up some.” [Snap out of it Faith, you can’t go weeping like a little girl. Beth needs you to be strong for her, so suck it up!] Faith angrily berated herself and continued the process of washing the dirt off, rinsing and continuing to gently clean B. After making several trips for clean water, Faith finally finished washing Beth from head to toe and got her into some clean clothes.


Faith looked out the shuttered window of the cottage she was holed up in with Beth. The last few days had been really rough on them both. They had been forced to flee several times when patrols had come close to where they were hiding, and after 12 hours of being on the run they had finally thrown off the French Army patrols and found this abandoned cottage. Turning away from the window where she had kept watch, Faith looked over and saw Beth curled up on her side with a blanket on the floor, sleeping finally. [I don’t know how the hell she could keep up with me. Not with the shape she’s in.] Faith looked back out the window as she felt tears in her eyes, [I won’t let them take you back B, I promise.]

Yawning, Faith moved back away from the window quietly, trying not to wake Beth. As she moved past Beth, Faith heard her start mumbling, “I won’t break, I’m a Marine. I won’t break.” Faith could see the tension in Beth’s body, Faith reached down and brushed a strand of hair away from Beth’s eyes and gently ran her hand down Beth’s back over and over. Slowly Faith felt the tension leave Beth’s body and relax, satisfied Beth would sleep Faith stood up and walked out of the room.

Faith hadn’t gone far when she heard Beth’s voice crying out, “NO! STOP!! NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!” Faith turned and ran back into the room with Beth who was shaking and crying. Dropping down Faith pulled Beth into her arms, “Sshhh, it’s okay. Ssshhh. You’re safe now,” Faith kept repeating the words as she gently rocked Beth in her arms and held her until Faith felt Beth fall asleep. Beth was wrapped around her like an octopus, but when Faith started to untangle herself from Beth she heard Beth start to whimper. So she stayed there and drifted off to sleep, in the arms of the one person she longed to be with…


Faith woke to a sound she hoped she’d never hear again in her lifetime. A faint keening sound. Looking around the room Faith saw that it was empty. Quickly she got up off the floor and headed towards where she heard the keening. After a quick search through the house Faith found Beth sitting on the kitchen floor pulled into a tight ball, her arms were wrapped around her. Beth was covered in sweat and rocking slowly back and forth. Faith walked over to Beth and knelt down in front of her. When she reached out to touch Beth, Faith saw her flinch and pull away. “B, it’s me Faith. You’re safe now.” Faith moved her hand slowly towards Beth’s face and brushed the long hair away that was covering her face. She ran her fingers gently down Beth’s jaw and cheek. “It’s okay Beth, I’m here and no-one’s gonna hurt you, ever.”

Faith searched Beth’s face for any signs of recognition, but saw none. There was only fear in Beth’s face. “B you know me. Somewhere in there you know me. I’m Faith, you’re slaying buddy. We used to walk through the park on down nights when the cemeteries were quiet. We’d sit on the merry-go-round and talk. I won’t hurt you Beth.” Faith moved forward a few inches and stopped, “Remember the time you took me to play miniature golf and how much I said I hated it. But you knew I was lying, as long as I was with you it didn’t matter.” Faith kept her voice calm and soothing as she spoke and saw Beth relax just slightly so she continued to talk. “Do you remember the night I kissed you? I do. There was a full moon that night and we were done patrolling. I looked at you and leaned over and kissed you. I just wanted to ruffle your feathers, but you kissed me back. And…and…it was like nothing else B.”

Faith continued to gently caress B’s cheek and saw her slowly stop rocking back and forth. Faith saw the fear slowly leave Beth’s face and a semi-recognition take over. “Come back to me B, you’re safe now and nothing’s gonna hurt you ‘cause I’m here now. It’s okay.” Faith watched Beth move forward towards her until she was only inches away and then sniff her neck. .

“Mate? Mate protect from bad men?? Bad men come and take away and hurt. Leave and then come back and hurt more. Tired of hurting pain. Want it go away. Mate make it go away now?” Beth asked almost pleadingly.

Faith nodded and put her arms around Beth, pulling her close against her. “They won’t hurt you again B. I promise.”

Faith felt Beth’s arms hesitantly wrap around her before Beth settled closely against her. “Is tired now, need rest. Safe now. Mate protect us.”

Holding Beth closely Faith gently rubbed Beth’s back until she felt Beth’s breathing slow down, even as she fell asleep in her arms.

Gently Faith picked Beth up so as to not wake her and carried her into the master bedroom. She laid Beth down in the center of the bed and then lay down next to her. Beth immediately moved over and wrapped herself around Faith, holding her tightly. Faith saw a small smile played on Beth’s face as she snuggled close to her.

Closing her eyes, Faith felt drained emotionally and exhausted, she was scared by what she had found out and what could have happened to Beth to make her retreat into herself the way she was now. [I mean it B, I’ll kill the next person who tries to lay a hand on you.] With a fleeting glance at Beth, Faith let the sleep overcome her.


Council Chambers…

The room was dark except for the few lights on the walls that kept the total darkness at bay. There was a large circular table in the center of the room, seated around it were seven black-robed and hooded figures.

A large figure at the top of the table spoke, “Is everything prepared brothers?”

“Yesss, all hass been sset in motion. We need but one pieces for usss to complete the ritual Lord Vaarden” The figure to his left replied.

“What of the last piece?” Another figure asked in a deep baritone voice.

“Yes, what of the other?” a silkily seductive feminine voice asked. “We cannot verify that she has been ‘removed’ from the playing field.”

The large figure turned to look at the ‘woman’. “She will be taken care of shortly.”

A green-scaled fist slammed down on the tabletop across from the head of the head of the Council. The figure was tall and massively built even under the robes that hid its features. “You underessstimate her Varrden. Three timesssess you hass tried to kill her and three timessess you hass failed. Ssshe is becoming too powerfulss. We should have destroyed her long ago, before ssshe could be a threat…”

“No Sharas, you worry over nothing. It does not matter is she lives or not. She has been captured and is no longer a threat. Soon everything will be in place and then ‘nothing’ will stop us. The Watcher’s Council and their annoying Slayers will be unable to stop it. The time of the Prophecy is almost at hand, nothing can stop it and we will rule once again.”

Sharas hissed loudly, “A foolsss you are Vaarden, underssesstimate thisss ones and you ssshall follow in your predecesssor’sss fate. Do not forget her failure at the hands of the Slayers at Rakata. When Krakatau erupted we losst many of our brotherssss and sissstersss.”

“Enough Sharas!! I rule the Council and you will silence that forked tongue of your or I will remove it! We will have our Slayer and we will kill the other at our leisure, and then…then we shall have what is rightly ours.”


1 Week Later…

Faith snuck through the bushes at the side of the house. Her eyes darting wildly, searching for any signs of inhabitants or patrols, she made her way quickly to the back of the house, keeping low to the ground. She pulled open the door and entered the darkened hallway. Gripping the M4 carbine she darted quickly up the stairs. The stairs squeaked loudly underneath her feet and she flinched. [Damnit Faith! Damnit!] Faith checked the first bedroom and then the second room, they were all empty, just like the last house they hand been in. Quickly Faith darted back down the steps and out the door.

The driving rain hit her eyes and she blinked, covering them with her arm before moving back into the bushes where she’d left Beth. They’d been on the run for the last five days, and it seemed the heavens had decided to punish them for whatever they had done wrong because it had been raining for just as long. Faith slung her rifle over her back with the barrel facing down and bent down next to Beth, and touched her forehead, feeling the heat coming off of her despite the cold weather and the rain that was pouring down on them. “Okay Beth, there’s a nice house waiting for us just a few yards away.” Faith waited for a few seconds for Beth to reply but got none. Struggling to remain calm Faith pulled Beth upright and draped her arm over Beth’s shoulder, supporting almost all of B’s weight as they moved. Beth’s head lolled forward and her breathing was coming in rasping hitches, but Faith kept up the pace. They had to get inside before someone saw them. Beth stumbled, losing her footing and nearly pulling Faith down into the mud with her as the rain came down harder.

Faith pulled Beth out of the mud and started forward again. “Come on B, just a few more steps.” But she couldn't even see the house through the sheet of rain. Beth started to go down again but Faith quickly grabbed her, she winced as Beth let out a moan of pain. “I'm sorry B, here.” She tucked one arm underneath Beth's knees and cradled her against her chest.

“Faith...... hurt...... make stop....” Faith felt Beth rest her head against her shoulder as she collapsed into a wheezing fit.

“You just need to a warm bath B. I'll get you some blankets. Just stay awake please.”

“Can't...... make hurt...... stop..... please.”

****Beth slammed the door open to her room, storming across and into the bathroom. “Leave me alone Tay.”

Taylor smirked as the bathroom door slammed in his face. “No can do Beth. Marines don't leave Marines. What the hell happened out there?”

“Get out of here Taylor! It doesn't matter.” Beth threw a punch, barely pulling it before her fist smashed into the wall.

Taylor sighed pacing in front of the door. “It does matter. What the hell where you thinking Beth? You could have gotten us all killed. You know they are just looking for a reason to fry your ass. And as your squad leader…”

The door slammed open and Beth marched right up to him. “Don't pull that higher ranking bullshit with me Taylor. You know as well as I do that I could kill you before you ever knew I moved.”

Taylor backed up a few steps, raising his hands in surrender. “True. But as a friend, what is going on with you?”

Taylor watched Beth cross the room to the window. She pulled open the curtain slightly letting in the sunlight. “This isn't me Taylor.” She motioned to the fatigues she was wearing and the duffle she'd dropped in her haste. “I.. can't do this anymore, Tay. This isn't me.”

“You're right Beth, this isn't the you from Sunnydale.” He crossed over to her and turned her around so she could see the sincerity on his face. “But this is you. This is the new you, and you love what your doing in the Marines. I know this ‘cause I can tell by your eyes. On the practice field, the parade ground, even hanging out with the guys...your eyes light up Beth. Whatever's bugging you, it doesn't involve the Corps. So don't lie to me and please don't shut me out.”

Beth sighed but didn't back away from him, “Dawnie turned sixteen today, I promised her that when she turned sixteen I'd help her start a down payment for her first car. I failed her, just like I failed the guys during the combat exercise today. I can’t do this anymore Taylor.

“You made a mistake today Beth, that's what the exercise is for. And I've never met your sister, but I know she doesn't blame you for anything. If she's a tenth of the person you are, she'd never do that.”

“No Taylor I can't. I'm tired of this,” Beth waived her hands around, “of having everyone looking over my shoulder and every CO trying to get the ‘convict’ out of their unit as fast as possible. For the last year and a half I’ve played by all the rules and I've had to do everything three times better then anyone else just to be judged half as good. I can't do that anymore.”

Taylor reached over and grabbed Beth by the shoulders and shook her, “Yes you will Beth, because that's the choice you made when you chose the Corps, so deal with it ‘cause you're not going anywhere. And one more thing Beth, Marines don't say can't. It's not in our vocabulary.”

Beth smirked at Taylor, “Fine Mr. Smarty pants. Cannot,” and stuck her tongue out at him before she picked up her duffle bag and headed back towards the barracks.****

Faith kicked the door open, stumbling into the house. Rainwater pooled at her feet as she struggled to hold Beth and not lose her footing on the wet floor. Leaning against the wall Faith caught her balance and knocked the door closed with her foot. Walking a few steps, Faith felt her strength ebbing. Gently she laid Beth down on the floor, Beth shivered violently in her soaked clothing and her lips were blue from the cold…“T-T-Tired of pain. W-Want it t-t-to end...”

Faith forced herself up and towards the bathroom down the hall, [Gotta get some blankets and get B dried off and warm.] She pulled the linen closet door open and grabbed several towels and blankets. Turning Faith ran back towards where B was shivering on the floor. Faith started removing Beth's clothes hurriedly so she could get her wrapped in some warm blankets. A blow to the head knocked her back and Faith looked up from the floor and saw Beth struggling to stand up, barely able to stand, “NO! Not again! I'll kill you first!”

Beth fell back weakly against the wall, “No!” she mumbled weakly as Faith leapt up to grab her before she fell.

“Ssshhh, it's okay B. You're safe.” Faith said as she felt Beth weakly struggle against her grip.

Beth's struggles slowly ceased, “B, I have to get you out of those wet clothes okay? You're safe with me here.” Faith slowly started to remove Beth's clothes and got her wrapped up in the blankets she had grabbed. Picking Beth up again Faith moved her toward the living room and in front of the fireplace where she laid her down, moving over to the fireplace Faith threw several logs inside along with some kindling and after several tries got a fire started. Quickly she got it blazing and the temperature slowly began to rise, looking back Faith heard Beth mumble weakly and moved over by her side.

“I'm tired Tay...always alone now. Tay?” Faith sat silently trying to decide whether to reply.

Faith saw Beth shiver and put her arm around her and pulled Beth close to her. “Yeah, I'm here Beth.” Faith finally replied. “Beth, why are you hiding?” Faith asked.

Beth snuggled closer to Faith, "Not hiding, it hurt. Safer here now. Found Faith.” Faith saw Beth smile as she said her name.

“Are you sure it's safe there Beth? How can you tell?”

“It safe. If can't see, I can't hurt. Beside, Faith loves me, can feel it when she is nearby. All warm and comfy feeling from her.” Beth smiled again.

“You need to open your eyes look at the real world sometime Beth, you can't hide forever.”

“I'm afraid Tay, I’m afraid of what I'll see.”

Faith scowled as she heard B's words, “What are you afraid you'll see B...Beth” Faith asked, concern coloring her voice.

“Afraid...mate leave...” Beth yawned loudly, “” Beth drifted to sleep in Faiths arms, her head was pillowed on Faith's chest and she held Faith closely. Even in her sleep Faith noticed Beth seemed to hold onto her as if she'd disappear.

Faith eyes started to droop as exhaustion started to overwhelm her. Shaking her head, Faith tried to stay awake, but her eyes slowly drifted shut and her last thought [Gotta stay awake....]


Angel Investigations

Angel heard his private phone ring and picked it up on the fourth ring. “Yes?”

“Good morning Angel.” Giles said to get the pleasantries out of the way.

Angel sighed mentally, even after all these years he didn't like talking to Giles. The rift between them from when he had killed Jenny Calendar had never healed and had only grown over the intervening years. “Yes Giles? What is it?” Angel asked impatiently.

“Ahh yes. Always to the point. I need to get in touch with Faith.”

“Faith? Why do you need to contact Faith Giles?” Warning bells had gone off in Angel's head when Giles brought up Faith.

“I have a problem over here and Willow asked me to contact Faith and ask her to come down to Sunnydale to give us a hand.”

“If Willow asked you to call, why are you calling me instead of Faith? She ‘did’ give you Faith's phone number, right?’ Angel asked trying to mask his suspicion.

“Of course, however when I rang her number there was no answer at her flat. That’s why I’m talking to you, to see if you know where she can be reached.”

Angel walked over to his desk and started scribbling notes on a pad. “I see, well she's not here right now. Did you want me to have Faith call Willow when I see her?”

“Uh, no! No, have her call me at The Magic Shop actually it will be easier that way. Good day.”

Angel waited until he heard Giles hang up and then walked out of his office and headed over to where Cordy was sitting at her desk. Just as he reached her Angel saw Cordy grab her head as she was assaulted with a vision from TPTB.

End Chapter 11

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