Story: Mother Güse Must Die (chapter 27)

Authors: StarCross

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Chapter 27

Title: Missionary Trib Girl Rebecca

[Author's notes: Zettai... Unmei... Aw screw it.]

Mother Güse Must Die
Chapter 22 - Missionary Trib Girl Rebecca
by StarCross

In our last episode, er, chapter, our heroines Rebecca "Becky" Maryland Wolfe, Mira Rama, Ginger R. Baker, and canine doberman HLS had met up with the clandestine, ultra-powerful, and über-cool all-girl organization, The Order of the Tall, Dark, and Bishoujo. After helping to lovey-dovey stepmother-and-daughter couple, the short-haired TDB Becky and her crew stop by at the family restaurant Lindbaum close to the coast, where there was one sole generic male waiter, an android waitress, a waitress too old to work there, and one orange-haired girl with big boobs.

The crew was seeing Hazuki Azuma, one of the high-ranking members of The Order, who was known as "The Dark Mistress". With her was her wife, Lillis Azuma, a blonde and blue-eyed girl in a summer outfit despite it being fall in Japan, and no one could take their eyes off the gigantic hat she was wearing probably because its scythe-tipped antenna was knocking and cutting things in their inadvertent path. Plus it had a huge blue in the middle that didn't blink, and it was certain that it was real and organic.

The tomboyish and bratty Ginger, gripped her fork hard ready to poke The Eye, not because she was afraid. She wanted to see it bleed and piss off its ditzy wearer.

"Darryl Güse seeks to revive the lost nation of Tribadia through Red Little," said Hazuki.

"Do you know more about it?" asked Becky. "Besides possessing a sleeping power that could destroy the world."

"Well, it has... Yeah, you're right. It does have a sleeping controllable power of the cosmos that can destroy the cosmos. There is a theory though that encased in the core of the island nation is relic of the Lesbian Goddesses of Darkness and Light. Legends have it that our kind, a Tall, Dark, and Bishoujo, serve as priestesses of the Goddess of Darkness, while Red and similar are the priestesses of the Goddess of Light."

"So that means I can command the power if I shag a TDB," said Ginger. "Sis, wanna get it on? And shut up Mira!"

Mira, who was about to protest Ginger's proposal, immediately shuts her mouth in shame.

"But I still need the power to defeat Güse and her forces!" Becky cried. "And a new sword! Can I have yours Sensei?"

"No," replied Hazuki. "Repair the one you got."

"Aw, I don't wanna go to Zanzô! She takes too long."

"There is no other way! Go and get it repaired so we can start the training!"

"Excuse me ma'am," said Mira. "If Güse is such a threat, why don't you all attack her right now?"

"Damn it Mira!" Ginger cried. "Do that and story will be less interesting!"

"Güse's spies have planted themselves all over the world," said Hazuki. "Any movement from us will put it and Red Little in more danger. But we have time, and training Becky is paramount in having our plans succeed."

"She's not the main character you know."

"You only wish you were Ginger," smirked Becky.

"You already got your chance in that prequel!"

"What prequel?"

"Enough breaking the fourth wall!" Hazuki cried. "What are you doing standing around here for?"

"Finishing our sundae."

"Waiting for your wife to fondle from under the table," said Ginger.

"Lillis has been fondling me ever since we got here," said Hazuki. "I already ejaculated nine times!"

"So that stream coming from under the table isn't a spill," said Mira leaning towards the floor.

At that moment, one of the waitresses who looked too old to work here, despite being in her mid-twenties and a hottie, slipped on the stream and broke all the empty glasses she was carrying back to the kitchen. After that, Natsuki and Shizuru came by tugging a dog by the leash.

"Hey Natsuki," said the big-chested waitress. "You're not allowed to bring dogs here."

"This won't take a while Mai," said Natsuki.

"What happened to Duran?"

Natsuki and her wife headed over Becky and Hazuki's table, and there she threw the leash into Mira or Ginger's lap.

"Your dog is at it again," said Natsuki.

"HLS?" said Becky. "I thought she was back in the car? That we stole. That is yet another orange freakin' Volkswagen."

"Give the poor tribade dog a break," said Shizuru. "She's in love!"

"It's making Duran uncomfortable," said Natsuki. "Waving that double-dildo strap-on around is one of the reasons, and I don't want the kids seeing it."

"You and Duran are so alike. You too nearly went catatonic when I--"

"Okay, we got get back and take the kids to school. Becky, fix your sword so we can launch our counterattack."

Natsuki tried to head back to the door, but she slipped on the stream of ejaculate and knocked the older waitress back on the floor. The two-girl pileup was arousing because Natsuki boobs were meshed perfectly and perpendicularly between the waitress's own.

"Midori..." grumbled Natsuki.

"Hiya Natsuki," said the waitress.

They stuffed themselves into a pumpkin-orange Volkswagen Polo III. Ginger reminded Becky that driving in Japan was like driving in the U.K. Or Australia. Or India. They drove deep into Tokyo, probably close to Shibuya, and illegally parked at the side of the road right in front of the NHK television studio

Chic-dressed, the crew marched in taking no shit from the Japanese greeters, although Mira helped a bit exerting some mood-altering perfume, which Becky, Ginger, and HLS vaccinated against before hand. They just needed time to enter the studio three right in the middle of the show.

They thought it was Iron Chef, but it turned to be interesting, which meant that it was unpopular. It was in an Iron Chef-style though, but instead of competing chefs of making dishes with a certain unique key ingredient such as seahorses or marshmallows, the contestants, who were blacksmiths or pretend blacksmiths, were supposed to make a unique weapon able to cut a gushing watermelon, which fetched a high price in Japan since it was not grown there. Today, the competition was to create a kick-ass spear. Ariko Zanzô, the host, gave all the play-by-play in Japanese, and occasionally talked to a panel of judges that included an obscure Japanese swordsmith, "Bill" who was known as the assassin leader Snake Charmer of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad, David Carridine, and Gackt.

It was likely that the show would be pulled off the air. Regardless, Ariko was popular on the Internet, and already DVDs of her show made the sales charts. Once the taping was over, the celebrity judges were hurried out to other ventures, and the riot police beat out the audience who consisted of horny fanboys who wrote doujinshi (amateur comics) of Ariko in rapist sex fantasies.

Unbeknownst to all but a select group, Ariko had a deadly secret. No, it wasn't that she was a descendant of famous swordsmiths and that she was the last in the long line. It was fairly obvious that her loyalty was to the Order of the Tall, Dark, and Bishoujo. Almost everyone knew her alternate title, "the Lililian Sword-Maker."

There was a tall black woman with dyed yellow hair and sunglasses who acted as somewhat of a bodyguard or manager. She was almost always seen with Ariko, and was usually very close to her side. Becky, Mira, Ginger, and HLS followed the two backstage into their dressing rooms (after picking the lock of the locked door). When they entered the tall black woman was already halfway undressed as was Ariko, and she was performing hot and passionate tribadism on the table.

"This will only take an hour," Ariko moaned. "Oh, Camille!"

"Damn it Ariko," grumbled Becky. "I don't have time!"

"Have patience," said Camille, the tall black woman. She kissed her lover, and then leapt onto the table to further grind Ariko's vagina.

"I don't see what's so bad," said Mira.

"It's not that," said Becky. "Do you know how long I waited until I got my Shinseiki? It was almost a year! And all these two were doing was having sex, sex, sex, sex, and more sex. Sure it was nice to watch for half a year, but I had things to do! On top of that, my sword was defective!"

Nearly two hours later, Ariko and Camille had finished their lovemaking, and Camille slapped the sleeping Becky, Mira, Ginger, and HLS to waking.

"As I was saying," said Ariko, "your sword broke because I didn't finish reinforcing it."

"What was that?" Becky slurred.

"I'd say it was your fault for angering Azuma-sensei when you molested her daughter."

"You pissed off your teacher?" Ginger grinned. "I would pay to see that!"

"Shut it," said Becky. "You want a spanking."

"Anyway," said Ariko. "I already received an email of your arrival and the fact you foolishly broke your sword. I'll repair under the condition that you WAIT. And I'll require a total payment of ten million dollars."

"Done. You hear that Ginger?"

"You don't have ten million dollars," said Ginger.

Becky raised her slapping right hand.

"Um, I guess I'll lend it to you--with interest."

"Very well," said Ariko. "I'll take the broken shards. Camille, it looks like we have time for another quickie."

"All right babe!" saluted Camille.

"Ariko!" Becky cried. "Seriously, Red-chan's in trouble!"

"I'll finish it in a month," said Ariko as she began to undress again. "You can join if you want to."

"I miss Red-chan..."

"You're horny and you're impatient," said Ginger. "Not a good combination."

Becky and her crew spent the following month in Tokyo, while Ginger, Mira, and HLS had their own misadventures that might be written quite soon.

By some miracle, Ariko had finished reforging the Shinseiki, now re-christened as the Tsukiseiki one week earlier. Her excuse was that her show was finally cancelled.

Becky and her crew then arrived to Ariko's foundry located outside Tokyo, and mainly to Becky's dismay she had to take a number. There were other sword-wielding wannabes waiting for their order in the hospital-like waiting room, which was further made strange when the receptionists were dressed in pink nurse uniforms. The loud noises and banging of Ariko and Camille having sex did nothing to arouse the mostly-male customers, the like of which came from the Crazy 88's, the Organo mob group, and Ninja Burger.

After almost two hours of waiting, Becky and her party were called up to the main foundry room. Once they entered, Ariko and Camille were already buttoning themselves up.

"Make it quick," said Ariko. "Camille and I are going to sex it up in a couple of minutes."

"Is my sword done damn it?" Becky asked.

"Oh yes. Good as new. Great. Perfect. Ready to go."

"What's with all the words?"

"Here ya go."

Ariko shoved the sheathed Tsukiseiki into Becky's arms. She then immediately leaped into Camille's body, wrapped her limbs around her, and started making out.

"So what's been improved?" Ginger asked. "Can it split apart like a snake-blade? Does it have a switch for an extender blade beam? Or it is black like Ichigo's Zanpakuto?"

Becky unsheathed her sword. It looked exactly the same like when she first received her Shinseiki, but the respect she had now developed for her blade--her partner--made it seem that it was purified and oozed with power.

"Eh?" Ginger said. "Nothing's changed. You've been gypped!"

"I haven't," grinned Becky. "Finally I can challenge Darryl Güse."

They heard banging and shouting noises, but it wasn't Ariko and Camille, who were now humping each other directly over the burning hot coal by the furnace without pain or injury. The door to the main foundry was kicked open, and in came a bratty schoolgirl dressed in a goth-like sailor uniform. She wore a loose necktie like a gangster, her jacket fitted loosely on her arms, and her black and torn skirt extended towards her booted ankles. She had short fiery black hair with a white forelock. Her skin wasn't tanned, as it was her natural light brown. Her eyes were of insane blue. For some reason, she reminded everyone of Ginger, yet darker.

"Ariko!" cried the girl. "I want my fucking sword!"

"Ichiko, please!" cried a very tall woman with white skin, long black hair, and worried black eyes. Her entire body, save for her pretty face, was adorned in a sexy pure white nun's habit.

"You already have a sword you can use," said the nun. "Over one hundred I might add."

"It's not enough!" said Ichiko. "I need to go up to unlimited blade works!"

"It seems that you have met your match," Becky said to Ginger.

Mira suddenly eeped.

"She's not my type," said Ginger. "Now let's go. We'll leave the tribades to their demise."

"Not so fast," said Ichiko. "I've decided to take your sword."

"No way. It's gonna cost you."

"But you already gave it to me."

Becky looked in her hands. Her sword was already in the hands of the bratty girl of five foot and five inches.

"Oh, please don't do this again," said the tall and sexy nun.

"Why not?" said Ichiko. "They can always fight for me it at the Dueling Arena at Ohtori."

"Speaking of which, the Student Council have complained again about our unauthorized use of the--"

"All right you faggots!" Ichiko yelled to Becky and co. "I'm taking your sword! Come and get it at the Dueling Arena!"

Becky and the girls were watching Camille perform tribadism on Ariko, doggie-style.

"Hey," shouted Ichiko. "I'm talking to you!"

"Yeah, sure," said Becky. "We'll get it later. Damn, I can't believe it can be done that way..."

"Fine! We'll take the dog!"

Ichiko jerked HLS away by the collar.

"Sure," said Becky. "Whatever."

"We'll take this Muslim!"

Ichiko pulled Mire into a headlock.

"Be my guest," said Ginger. "Be careful though. She is a damn traitor."

"Oh Ginger," Mira muttered sadly.

Nothing was working. Ichiko had no choice but to discard her disinterested hostages and knocked Ginger out with the sheathed sword.

"I'm taking this tomboy American," said Ichiko. "Adios."

Ichiko, the nun, and Ginger had disappeared. This sent Mira into a near-berserker mode, and she nearly snapped Becky's neck off in order to get her attention.

"Rebecca Maryland Wolfe!" Mira cried. "We got to rescue Ginger!"

"She might not like it..."

"Do it now!"

Of course, Mira made Becky run outside. Actually, she carried her in her mad dash to find their pumpkin orange Volkswagen Polo III, which was towed away a while ago. She stopped a random luxury car, which looked banged up due to a delinquent teacher who had a tendency to drink a lot. Mira threw the occupants out, and stuffed HLS and Becky inside. Taking command of the wheel, she sped off.

"Ah fuck!" said Yukari, the driver of the now-stolen car. "My car!"

"How are we going to take the students to Chiyo-chan's summer home?" asked the car's passenger, Nyamo.


"Mira, you're driving on the wrong side of the road," said Becky.

"Shut-up, shut-up, shut-up!" Mira screamed.

The chaos she had caused in the freeways and roadways was nothing compared to the chaos she would cause at the school.

Ohtori Academy was a prestigious academy where boys where somewhat of a lime green uniform, and girls where these colorful yet loud red and yellow-striped ties over their white blouses in addition to their pushing-the-regulation-skirts. Student councils members looked as if they came from some snotty French military. They had a pretty phallic astronomy tower where the chairman and his sister apparently sleep in--together--on the same couch. There was a weird canopy forest behind the track and field. Ohtori also had a drama club, a shadow puppet club, a zoo, a dairy farm, the prestigious Mikage Seminar Building where one-hundred schoolboys died due to some insane prick with pink hair, and drama--lots of it. Oh, and if one were to bend the rules a bit, girls were allowed to wear a boys' uniform of their own color--provided they added a skirt over their gym shorts.

In the future, Ohtori would undergo a massive renovation in which all the floors, classrooms, and chalkboards would move left, right, up, down, and diagonally hourly for artistic reasons (or for no apparent reason). A new wing of people-to-car transformation would be built to make full use of the Formula One racetrack that the school hoped to use in the circuits. Also planned for the future was an entire Disneyworld-like theme park on wheels.

It looked as if Ohtori would be renovating soon, as Mira sent the car plowing through the confused students and interrupted a handsome green haired man's kendo practice. They then crashed right through the music room, thereby destroying a piano that a blue-haired girl was laying on top of as she listened to her twin brother playing on the instrument in question. Through the halls, the car wrecked through the zoo, running over horses, cows, bulls, kangaroos, and elephants. Before it crashed into the curry storehouse, and bumped off a haughty blonde junior high girl and her elementary school page.

Becky and HLS sneezed.

"Mira," said Becky. "These boxes of curry said that they're explosive."

"I fucking hate curry!" Mira yelled. She threw an explosive chemical vial in the middle of the thrashing, and once out the storehouse exploded in a mushroom cloud of spiciness. Fortunately, it only took out the storehouse along with the nearby Mikage Seminar Building. Good thing no one was in there except for that pink-haired prick.

Meanwhile, a run-through of yet another play was being put up by the girls A-Ko, B-Ko, and C-Ko of the Shadow Puppet Club.

"Didja hear? Didja hear?" asked A-Ko, shown as a shadow on a sunset-orange wall.

"Are we going to do this shit again and talk about heavy stuff that has nothing to do with the main storyline?" asked B-Ko.

"Quit your bitching and read the damn lines. We're supposed to be make symbolic allegories of the events at hand."

"Can I be the new B-Ko?" asked C-Ko.

"Get back in the cage monkey! Now that the hell are we talking about again?"

"That symbolic allegories thing again," groaned B-Ko.

"I'm playing with myself!" exclaimed C-Ko.

"That's it," said A-Ko. "I quit. I can't work like this anymore. And besides, there's this thing..."

"What thing?" asked B-Ko.

"The truth is, I'm actually a guy... named Crispin Freeman."

"Holy shit! You are? You're helluva impressive that you can fake a little girl's voice."

"How else did I get into the voice acting business?"

"Well, I too have a confession to make. I'm also a guy... named Steve Blum."

"You too? Wow, never in my life would I meet a person who can imitate a little girl."

"Yeah. FBI often uses me to trap pedophiles."

"I have a confession too!" C-Ko exclaimed. "I am also a guy named Patrick Stewart."

"Captain Picard!" cried A-Ko and B-Ko.

"Yeah, the same."

"Unbelievable," said A-Ko. "All this time I have been working with one of the two great voice actors in the industry--and one of them is from Star Trek the Next Generation. You know, I don't think I'll quit after all. I got a little angry a while back due to the stress of having to play other roles and hiding my identity. Man, do I feel so relaxed. Okay guys, let's take this to the top and--"


The shadow puppet theater collapsed due to an incoming car. The three actors were run over, and their shadow puppets were now stuck on the windshield, which Mira wiped off using the wipers.

"Mira, do you know where you are going?" Becky asked.

"The dueling arena," Mira replied. "By Allah, where the hell is it?"

"You might want to turn 'cause we're going to crash into that phallic astronomy tower!"


As expected, crash! It was a hard hit, but not hard enough to flatten the car like an accordion. The airbags were deployed for the very first time, and its occupants slumped out like drunkards.

The ground creaked, and the tower began leaning westward almost like the Tower of Pisa. Nearby two students, a purple-haired girl who we shall call Shirori Takatsuki, and a taller, orange-haired student council member, who we shall call Juri Arisugawa, were sole witnesses of the crash that happened in the pathway between the tower and the ruined shadow puppet theater, which no one goes to anyway.

"Hey," said Juri. "Are you guys okay? Shirori, call for an ambulance."

The enraged Mira tackled Juri and began slapping and punching her.

"Where's the Dueling Arena?" Mira yelled. "Where is it?"

Mira then pumped Juri with three vials of truth serum.

"Isn't that a little too much?" asked Becky as she rubbed her head. "She's doped as much as it is."

"I'll ask again," growled Mira.

"North past the track and field inside the forbidden forest," slurred Juri. "But you need a Duelist's Ring to enter."

Having no time to remove Juri's ring, which was the Duelist Ring, Mira put her on her feet and sent her marching.

"Shirori!" Juri yelled. "I masturbate at your yearbook picture!"

Shiori's jaw dropped like that famous "The Scream" painting, and it lingered like that many minutes after Becky, Mira, HLS, and Juri disappeared from view. Rage developed in her sadomasochistic mind, and finally she screamed.

"That's it!" she yelled. "I'm going to the Mikage Seminar!"

The Mikage Seminar Building was already burning.

They had to drag Juri by the hand due to her daze-like condition caused by an overdose of truth serum. They went through the entrance of the forbidden forest and walked down a slab walkway that hung over a pool of water. They reached a dead end.

"How do we get in?" asked Becky.

"I'll blow this up if I have to," growled Mira. "Is there more curry here?"

"Ya don' need curry," slurred Juri. "Here."

She gripped the ornate handle, and drop of water horizontally fell on her rose crested Duelist Ring. A rush of water fell from the overhead gates. A metal gate closed the path from behind, and the dead end began folding unto itself to form a rose.

Unfortunately, the party was sprayed with massive douses of water. With the place nearly flooding, they had to rush in.

"Plumbing's broken," said Juri.

"We got to hurry!" Mira yelled. "To the elevator!"

"Elevator's out of order."

There was sign in the leaning elevator indicating such. The only other avenue to head to the dueling arena was a wide and spiraling staircase heading up to god knows where.

"Fuck!" cursed Mira. She grabbed Juri's hand and marched up with Becky and HLS following behind.

Then they heard singing, which sounded like: "ZETTAI; UNMEI; MOKUSHIROKU."

"Now who's singing this crap?" Mira demanded.

"The Suginami Chorus," replied Juri. "They've been kidnapped and forced to sing every time we use the stairs or elevator."

"Where are they?"

Juri motioned her head to a platform of chained, disheveled, and emancipated choir group. Mira shot each of them with tranquilizer darts, and they all collapsed to sleep.

"Thank you," said Juri.

They advanced further up, and the more they got tired from all the excitement from before. Finally, they emerged past the duelist arena gate, and discovered that they were outdoors, or perhaps in a Matrix-like virtual reality simulation. The platform was gigantic and circular, printed with a giant red rose over the mason floor. There was a spinning upside-down castle that entranced them so much that they got dizzy and threw up on the ground.

"They really oughta stop showing this shit," said Juri. "I mean come on! What is this? Fucking Disneyland?"

"You outlived your usefulness!" Mira cried. "Now where's my beloved Ginger?"

At the other end of the platform was a round table. Sitting at the table was four girls in chic seats, and a nun in pure white remained standing as their personal server. One of them was Ginger. There was Ichiko and two others, which was a tomboyish girl with long pink hair and black uniform jacket, and an Indian or Tamil girl in an Ohtori schoolgirl outfit. They were having tea and biscuits, with one cup purely alcoholic. There was also a purple monkey rat creature with big mouse ears dancing around drunk. It wore a tie just like the schoolgirl, and had a earring at his left, which in some cultures it implied that he or she was gay.

"And that's how you revolutionize the universe," said Ichiko putting down her bourbon tea. "Through absolute destruction caused by the maximized suffering of you and your partner!"

"Awesome!" clapped Ginger. "I should really do that someday! If I get a girl who won't BETRAY ME!"

Mira was hurt again. She slumped to ground, for all her drive and rage had escaped her.

"Anthy," said the pink-haired girl. "I really gotta say; you have the most kookiest friends."

"Don't you like them Utena-sama?" said Anthy, the brown-skinned Indian or Tamil girl.

"I do, but..."

"It's all right," said the nun. "They may talk big, but they will never cause the destruction of the universe and the breaking of reality."

"I guess you're right."

"Would you like more tea Oscar?"

"I'm Utena."

"Sorry. You two do look alike."

"That's all right."

"Utena!" cried Anthy. "Miss Wolfe has arrived."

"Took you so fucking long," said Ichiko rising. She then threw far across the dueling arena into Becky's hands the sheathed Tsukiseiki.

"You can't give it back!" Ginger cried. "You gotta charge her!"

"Which means I'm charging you in the end. Lalah Sune!"

"I'm Anthy," said Anthy.

"Whatever. God, you Indians look so much fucking alike. The roses please."

"Yes Miss Siva."

From the vase, Anthy gathered up a bunch of white roses and headed over to lapel it on Becky's left breast. Then her right breast. Then her shoulders, her knees, her feet, her wrists, her elbows, her butt, her waist sides, her hair, her ears, her collar, and finally ending right above her groin. Twenty-one roses total. Then Anthy went back to Ichiko to lapel one single white rose on her shirt pocket.

"What the hell is going on?" Becky asked. "I look like a fruit now!"

"We're dueling," Ichiko grinned. "Think you're lez enough to wield that Tsukiseiki?"

"Why dueling?"

"I placed a bet on you Sis," grinned Ginger. "If you win, I get loads of money. If you lose, I get more loads of money. And if you die, I'll rule the world! But not with miss TRAITOR over there."

"I'm sorry," Mira whimpered in fetal position by the parapet.

"The rules are thus," said Ichiko. "Any duelist who loses all her roses from her body loses the duel."

"But what's in it for me?"

"If you win, I won't kill you and your friends. If you lose... well, just don't lose. Horrible things happen when I have my sword. Selo!"

"Yes Ichiko dear?" answered the nun.

"Summon my Cross Sword!"

"Yes dear."

Selo took a deep breath and pushed out her boob-endowed chest.

"Oh noble Melfa," she recited. "I summon your dark power."

Light flowed to form a ball of light just above her cleavage apex point. When it was sizable, it glowed with bright intensity and overwhelmed Selo so much that she allowed herself to fall backwards. Ichiko appeared to her side to catch her time, but the method of which nearly looked like she almost kissed her.

A sword's handle ejected from the ball of light, and Ichiko pulled it up. Everyone was expecting a sword, but never did they witness a cringing sight of what was about to inspire. The blade kept on getting longer and wider like a cancer, and it began dwarfing everyone in the dueling platform. Bigger still it grew, and it took the shape of a wide and living black lance composed of countless blade "feathers" that breathed in and out. It kept on growing until it knocked into the spinning upside-down castle, which then ground to a halt. Gears, axles, and stones fell from the sky, causing everyone except Anthy, Ichiko, Selo, and that purple monkey thing to panic.

When it was done, the gargantuan lance-blade slammed onto the ground, causing the platform to tilt significantly towards its weight. Everyone and everything slide, except for Anthy, Ichiko, and Selo.

"Now you're done for!" Ichiko cried.

Selo shook her head as she came too. "Dear Ichiko," said Selo. "Don't you think that's too big?"

"Too big? Fuck no bitch! We wielded one the size of a galaxy!"

"But we're not at space anymore. Nor are we the main characters."

"Oh fine. Let me just pick one of the feathers here."

In one tug, Ichiko pulled out a mini-lance blade that quickly transformed a black sword with a cross-hilt. Anthy then procured a boom box and pressed play on the tape function.

Then there were bells. Wedding bells.

"Who's getting married?" Becky asked.

With the beginning of a cryptic gothic song from a musical--the music was coming from the boom box--Ichiko flew in and already deflowered Becky thrice--that is, she knocked out three of the roses. Becky quickly parried Ichiko with the more resilient and stronger Tsukiseiki.

"You're too slow!" Ichiko yelled. She pushed her opponent back.

Suddenly, a two-seater convertible car grew out of the ground like a mad gopher right underneath Becky, sending her flying in the air.

"Where'd that fucking car come from?" Becky yelled.

Ichiko took advantage of another car popping from out of the ground to launch herself up, and took out three more roses off of Becky. Becky then landed on a pile of school desks that each had a draft manuscript of New Era Angel of Depression 0 on top. The pages were torn apart as Ichiko cut her way like a madwoman on a safari hunt, and she took out three more roses from Becky.

Twelve left. At the same time, Mira, Juri, Anthy, and Utena sat a wide couch that inexplicably appeared out of nowhere. HLS was staring at the purple monkey thingy, who kept saying "chuuu" at almost every two seconds.

"Yo Utena," slurred Juri, still doped up on thrice the dosages of truth serum. "I really, really, really, REALLY hate your fucking guts, ya know? I mean, are you trying to be some kind cunty upstart? Dressing up like a boy and all that? You think you're all noble if you bend the fucking rules just so you can wear a boy's jacket and skirt that covers your gym shorts? But you know what? I wouldn't mind fucking your eyes out if it weren't for that Indian or Tamil girl sitting next to you.

"Speaking of which, Anthy. No offense, but you scare the shit out of me! And that Chuchu thingamajig. I speak for everyone when I say this: what the hell is that thing? Is it a mouse? A monkey? What is it? Speaking of which, where is that damn thing?"

HLS then walked by gagging. She coughed out a drool-infested tie, and then an earring.

Distracted the by sudden appearance of chalk tracing of the murdered on the ground, Becky lost four more roses. She then backed into the very edge of platform where a parapet ran along the perimeter.

"You might not want to stand there," said Ichiko.


WHACK! Becky was hit by a speeding two-seater convertible driving at a wheelie by none other than Ginger. Losing four roses, she was sent flying again, and seeing the massive blade lance still in place (and still dangerously tilting the platform) she stabbed her sword to slow herself down for the descent.

"I've lots of money riding on you!" Ginger yelled from the car. "Don't die on me yet! You have to take the fall later!"

It felt cold. Becky leaped off before she suffered hypothermia, and that was when Ichiko shot from below and lobbed off two more roses.

"You're not using your 'Secret Techniques'," grinned Ichiko. "Oh yeah. You can't because you're losing! You're not fit to wield the Tsukiseiki!"

Becky had cut her arm to block Ichiko from cutting one of the last two roses from her left nipple. She ran off, leaping over the school desks like a hurdle jumper, and dodging the gears and castle debris so she could hide in the forest of gopher convertibles jutting from the ground.

"Damn, that bitch is good," said Becky. "I got to come up with a plan--or a miracle."

Unbeknownst to her, the headlights of the gopher convertibles lit up towards the upside-down Disneyland castle. Something ghostly in the form of an Indian or Tamil prince with white hair and white uniform descended from one of the castle's towers and aimed straight for Becky in order to possess her.

Becky, however, saw the ghost. She shrieked at the sight and immediately cut it in half.

"Aw, no possession!" Becky yelled. "Get away! Get away! Get away! Call the Ghostbusters!"

She began hacking the ghost into ectoplasmic pieces, the likes of which Anthy and the others had just saw.

"Shit, she's gone and done it!" Utena cried.

"Ay, Dios mio!" Anthy yelled.

As the pieces of the ghost-man gagged and jiggled like Jello gelatin, Ichiko took this opportunity to surprise Becky and slice of another rose. Becky now had one left incontinently located above her crotch.

"One more left," cackled Ichiko. "It looks like you're going to be totally deflowered bitch."

Becky gripped her sword with both hands, and closed her eyes to concentrate. After one deep breath, she charged forward, and thus Ichiko did the same. Ichiko threw herself to the ground allowing her to slide down the incline with her Cross Sword pointing up in a bid to "deflower" Becky like a sharkfin. However, Becky quickly countered by throwing one of her throwing knives, knocking out Ichiko's white rose out of her pocket.

Then there were wedding bells. Again. Ichiko remained laying on the floor stunned.

"I lost," she said.

"Kind of stupid of you to do that on a rough surface," said Becky.

"But it was supposed to be oiled!"

"I had to wash it off this morning," smiled Anthy.

"You suck! You all suck!"

At the same time, Ginger screeched the convertible to a stop in front of the couch.

"Ah, crap you won!" she said. "I mean, it's great that you won Sis! Now where's my money Oscar and Lala?"

"Utena," said Utena.

"Anthy," said Anthy.

"And who said we were betting?"

"I did," said Ginger. "Just now."

"Sorry, but I'm just a poor student living at the dorms."

"I live with my brother," said Anthy.

"I've got money," said Mira.

"Oh, dear me," said Ginger. "Of all the fake companies I created, it seems that I don't have a business card for TRAITOR'S BANK! Sorry Paki, we're fucking closed!"


"Anyway, let's get the hell out of here while we burn the whole place."

"Not yet," said Becky. "You there!"

Everyone looked at Selo, the target of Becky's sword.

"Yeah, you! Draw out your weapon!"

"I am sorry Miss Wolfe," said Selo, "but I do not partake in the sins of violence."

"Drop the act! I have already proved your worth, but now I need to prove myself and this sword!"

"Miss Karuki," said Anthy. "Please don't."

Selo sighed. She removed her veil and headgear to reveal a long flowing black hair. Her expression changed that to serious, and she marched over to Ichiko.

"Wait, I can still take her on!" Ichiko cried. "Just give me one more chance."

"I need to borrow you," said Selo.

"Don't go in there! Stop!"

What transpired was odd and erotic. Selo's head was hidden inside Ichiko's long skirt. Something was happening for many minutes, as Ichiko was thrashing and moaning.

"There it is," said Selo.

A flash of light poured out of Ichiko's skirt. Selo backed away slowly, and during which she was pulling the shaft of a weapon. She finally stood on her feet to hold into the air for everyone to cower in fear towards.

"Utena," said Anthy. "Hold me."

Utena embraced her friend and roommate. Mira, on the other hand, turned towards Ginger, who was also scared.

"No!" Ginger cried to her. "Utena, hold me too!"

Defeated once more.

The weapon Selo held was beautiful and most certainly deadly. It was a single-bladed scythe weapon, and jutting from its sides were two living angel's wings that flapped and molted feathers of light.

"What do you call your weapon of choice?" Becky asked.

"This is my partner," said Selo. "The Winged Scythe."

"I see."

"I'll show no mercy, even to a core member of The Order."

"I don't expect you to."


"Look, I don't mind you destroying another universe like last time," Ichiko said.

"Rose please."


Ichiko caught a black rose Anthy tossed over to her, and then she clipped it onto Selo's chest. She ran off to hide behind the couch, which was slowly sliding towards the weight of the massive black blade lance. Anthy, Utena, Ginger, and HLS hid as well.

The wings on Selo's Winged Scythe glowed brighter, and a intense reverse-pressure of energy flowed into the weapon. Becky confidently stood her ground with her Tsukiseiki in a ready position.

"Now the real fight begins," grinned Selo.

The wings flapped, and Selo crossed blades with Becky with an impact that blew almost everything off the ground. The convertible gopher cars were torn apart. The desks flew up in the air via multiple whirlwinds. Pages of the New Era Angel of Depression draft manuscripts were torn from their binding. The dog and the girls stuffed themselves in the working convertible trying to get it to start. The entire platform was now tilting over, and the massive blade lance finally pulverized the upside-down Disneyland castle and toppled over.

"That's it!" cried Ginger as she pulled out a cellular phone. "I'm calling the Real Ghostbusters!"

"You stole my phone!" cried Utena.

As it turned out, the dueling arena was very convincing and elaborate illusion created by a large astro-projector, yet the fights were real, and the power Becky and Selo emitted as Tall, Dark, Bishoujos were also real and destructive. It was enough to make everything sink, destroy all matter of gears and underground parking garages, and the fight eventually imploded the forbidden forest.

It was at the decisive moment amidst the orgy of destruction that Becky had unknowingly unleashed a secret technique that she did not have a name for. It was like Darryl Güse's most powerful move, the Dragon Era Buster, and created a controllable vortex that pulverized the non-living. That move was enough to take off the rose from Selo's chest. Unfortunately though, Becky's rose had fallen off her groin minutes before. It didn't matter anyway on who lost or won.

They emerged from the rubble of the aftermath relatively unscathed. Was it a dream that had happened? No one knew for sure, because Ichiko and Selo were not found.

"Becky," said Mira. "Did you know those two?"

"No," said Becky. "I don't know the full roster of The Order, but I can sense she was very much like the rest of the core members."

"The power that woman emitted was the greatest thing I have experienced. It almost felt as if I saw my life flashing before my eyes, including the life I am about to life. It was if I saw through the eye of Allah."

Mira looked a Ginger, who was using HLS as a crutch as she walked across the smoldering ruins.

"Hey have you seen Chuchu?" Utena asked. "Anthy and I can't find him."

HLS gagged and coughed up a wad spit with purple hairs mixed into them.

"Sorry, I didn't notice," said Becky. "And sorry about the forest arena thingy."

"It's all right," said Anthy. "My brother is planning to remodel the whole school."

"Then I'll help you!" Ginger cried. "Gather up the gasoline and curry! Let's burn this place down!"

"While I didn't cause it," said Becky, "it seems that you're already too late."

"What do you mean?"

Ginger turned around. Ohtori was burning, and the leaning astronomy tower was leaning more than ever. Multiple explosions rang out due to the unusual amount of curry storehouses, and the animals ran wild and trampled over a blond chick who had an unusual fixation with her red-haired older brother.

"It can't be," gasped Ginger.

"What, you changed your mind and wanted to save it?" Becky asked.

"No! I wanted to burn down the school! Who did this?"

Mira raised her hand.

"I hate you!"

Ginger ran off wailing. After bidding Utena and Anthy goodbye, Becky, Mira, and HLS followed Ginger and disappeared.

A bus finally pulled up the only bustop closest to Ohtori. Gyrating their hips to the tune of "Livin' La Vida Loca" by Ricky Martin, three men took their time dancing out of the vehicle. The first was a tall red-haired man who dotes or toys with his little sister's head about him not being her brother. The second was a white-haired Indian and Tamil man in black slacks and a red shirt. The third was sunglasses-wearing leather clad man who looked like one of the Village People.

"These are some great moves!" said Akio, the Indian or Tamil guy. "I should make you part of the Student Council--hence the End of the World."

"Wooooo!" screamed Hard Gay, the man in the leather hot pants.

Then they stopped. Touga, the red-haired man, was the first to notice. Akio followed, but Hard Gay kept on dancing, or rather gyrating his hips in a semi-obscene way.

"My school!" cried Akio. "What happened to my school?"

Finally, the leaning astronomy tower collapsed. Metaphorically speaking, Akio and all other chauvinistic male egos and domination also collapsed like dysfunctional pensises.

Luckily, all the students, teachers, and staff had survived, including that blond brother-complex girl who keeps on getting run over by animals (mainly elephants) and who also had weird shit happening to her at every turn. With almost all her bones broken, she was placed in a full body cast and sped off to the nearest hospital with her three cronies and her young statutory-rape page accompanying her. It seemed that the survivors used the not-often used bus stop as a gather spot.

"Juri you got to calm yourself down," said the blue-haired piano player and part-time fencer Miki.

"Ya know Miki," slurred Juri. "I can see that you're pimpin' with the ladies and the dudes. In fact, I would not hesitate to fuck you on the spot if your twincestuous sister wasn't here. The only thing holding me back is that you have a dick. You have a dick 'cause you're a fucking dick. A fucking dick!"

Miki and Karou caught their breath at the bus stop at the top of the hill where the shocked trio had beheld the burning school. Juri glared at Akio, Touga, and Hard Gay, and had this to say to them:


She was right.

Just then, a white American hearse painted white and red pulled up to the bus stop. Out of this modified contraption of a car came four middle-aged men, one of them black, each of whom were wearing identical uniforms and had backpack-mounted technological gear connected to a gun-like device they held in their hands.

"Did someone call us?" asked the man who looked suspiciously like Bill Murray.

"There's a ghost!" Juri yelled, pointing at Akio. "Right there!"

The four men fired their gun like devices, and thus shot out some positronic plasma energy that only erotically tickled Akio. Offending and having enough of this (since they had to travel non-stop from New York to Japan), they proceeded to beat Akio with their devices, and then shoved him into the hearse-like vehicle. They drove off, with Touga and the others waving goodbye, and Hard Gay striking out his arms saying, "Wooooooooooo!" Those four men, the Real Ghostbusters by the way, would attempt to contain Akio in the Ecto-Containment Unit, despite him possessing a physical body and not a ghost body.

Juri never remembered what happened that day, but she wondered why her beloved Shirori was angry with her. Shirori had told her on the day before she left the country that she would be joining the criminal organization known as the Aphrodite Evolution.

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