The Love Letter Lovelies
by Glee-chan
10.
Makoto's feet ached from the pounding they took from only being protected by socks. But she kept running. She could see her destination in sight and all she cared about was getting there. The world spun, but Makoto refused to let it effect her. Her lungs felt like bursting, but her willpower kept her going. Her side stung from too much activity without any preparation, but she couldn't feel it. She had to get to Kaede, she had to see her.
She rounded the corner and ran down the stairs. She had made it. The public park where she had met Kaede. She spun around wildly looking for the kendo-girl. But by now the world had caught up to her and her vision was burled from exhaustion and dizziness. Not being able to take it she screamed out Kaede's name. She has to be here! She has to be!
"KAEDE!" Makoto shouted again, her voice ending in a wail. Her legs were shaking now, she felt drained. "KAEDE!"
"Mako-chan?"
As she predicted, there she was. Kaede was standing behind her, white faced with red eyes. Her cheeks were wet, and she was holding a rosary, clutching the crucifix. Makoto stumbled over to her and collapsed into her arms. Kaede sniffed sharply, dropped the neckless, and picked her up and the two of them went the closest bench. Makoto wished for the dizziness to stop just for a few minutes.
"You dropped your thing…" Makoto mumbled.
Kaede ignored that. "Mako-chan, are you crazy, you're not feeling well." Her voice sounded strained.
"D-Don't b-break u-p with m-me K-Kaede-chan." Makoto wheezed. "Y-You can't."
Kaede face looked pained. "If you only knew what I… you shouldn't have ran after me."
"Kaede-chan." Makoto wanted to tell her 1000 things at once, but she was so tired all she could muster was saying her name.
She heard Kaede sniff again, she looked up and saw she was crying. "Why'd you have to come after me?" Makoto reached up and wiped her cheek. Kaede leaned her face into Makoto's hand. "Mako-chan, I'm not worth it."
"Just tell me." Makoto got out, then took another deep breath. "Tell me why…"
Kaede bit her bottom lip. She turned away from Makoto so their eyes wouldn't meet. "Last night, I kissed another girl."
Makoto's heart, which was already rapidly beating, pinched. "Why?"
Taken in a deep breath Kaede gave in and decided to explain herself. "You aren't the first girl I've gone out with, Mako-chan. I had a girlfriend once before in Middle School. Her name is Sora Ito. Two months before school ended, we broke up amicably. We've continued to be friends despite going to different schools. She told me about her new boyfriend… and I told her about you. Then yesterday she sent me a text. She said that she got raped and she needed me. So that's why I left."
"Kaede-chan that's not-"
"Let me finish." Kaede interrupted. "I don't think I can bare explaining this again. So I left you. I left you without a second thought even when faced with you meeting that Kato maniac. Something I should have been there for, and I betrayed you for only one text. When I met up with Sora-chan I realized something was amiss, she wasn't acting miserable, she was acting like it was a date. I got the truth out of her. There was no boy, she invented him to make me jealous. When I didn't respond to how she thought I would, she tricked me into see her with that rape story. So there I was, I had learned the truth but I didn't leave. I didn't run back and help you with Kato-san, no, I just stayed with Sora-chan because I felt sorry for her. And then she kissed me. I pushed her away initially, but when she kissed me again, I didn't stop her. All the time you were worried about me, I was kissing someone else. After my mistake I told Sora-chan I couldn't see her again, that I had you… but I was so filled with shame that even when I left her I could answer my phone when you called. And because of that, you got taken advantage of by Fukui-san and got yourself sick. I'm such an awful person, Mako-chan. In one day I ruined everything. You deserve to be with someone who's better than me. My actions were deplorable, and it's a disgrace for you to further associate with me."
That was the most Kaede had ever spoken at once. Indeed, she looked somewhat worn out from having talking so much. Makoto thought about that as she let her story register in her brain. Kaede was upset that she wasn't there for her, and that she kissed her ex-girlfriend. But it wasn't Kaede's fault, it was all the ex-girlfriends doing.
"Kaede-chan, I don't care about what your ex-girlfriend did to you. I don't know what I would have done different in your situation. I can't blame you for anything you did. I just want to be with you."
Kaede finally turned and looked into her eyes. "I was weak, Mako-chan. Sora-chan knows how to push my buttons. I kissed her, Mako-chan…"
"I know." Makoto flinched slightly at the thought of Kaede kissing another girl. "But you dumped her for me… didn't you?"
"Yes, but that still doesn't excuse my behavior."
"You can't be perfect all the time." Makoto looked at Kaede weakly. "Last night, even I-"
"That's different. Fukui-san saw you were weak and took advantage-"
"Which was what Sora did to you." Makoto interrupted. "It's the same thing."
Kaede stopped and sighed. It seemed like she accepted Makoto's argument. "But what about today… you're sick and I completely ignored you…"
"You can make up for it by showering me with attention right now." Makoto gave her a weak smile. "Please Kaede-chan… you're the best person in my life. I don't want to lose you."
"Mako-chan." Kaede leaned in for a kiss then stopped herself. "I forgot, you're still sick." Then she looked at the state of Makoto and her face returned to being white. "I've been blathering on for so long and you're not well … you don't even have shoes on. Mako-chan!"
"You're more important."
Kaede stood up, walked over to her rosary and picked it back up. Wiping it off she stuck it back into her pocket, but not fully as some of the beads dangled out. Then she returned to Makoto and turned her back on her as she bent over. "Get on. I'll carry you home right now!"
"I live too far away for that." Makoto laughed slightly.
"Then I'll take you to my house, and we can call your parents and tell them where you are."
With that suggestion, Makoto was immediately clinging to Kaede's back as if she was a living backpack. Kaede held Makoto's legs, but in one hand also carried her book bag and the other her shinai. She walked the path back to the school, but went beyond it. It wasn't long until Makoto realized that Kaede lived in the tourist section of Yumoto.
"My family owns a traditional inn." Kaede explained as she walked, her breath heavy. "We have a small outdoor onsen, so we make most of our money when it's tourist season."
"You mean you get to bathe in a hotspring whenever you want?"
"Not really. Mom is strict about the customers having priority. We get to bathe in the springs when it's the off season usually." Kaede went on. "Though that's rare as well."
"Why?"
"On the offseason our little inn doubles as a love-hotel of sorts." Kaede sounded embarrassed at the fact. "Because it's so cozy, it sort of became like that."
"So you live at the inn?"
"Not in it. Our house is connected to it. I don't see the customers unless I go into the inn proper." Kaede went on. "I also don't see much of my parents either, so you don't have to worry about being a polite guest."
When they arrived at her house, Makoto understood what Kaede met when she said the house was attached to the inn. In reality it looked like the inn was bigger and that one half was made into a house while the other half stayed as an inn. As a result when they entered the house, the living room looked very much like a lobby and Kaede's room looked like something for guests. All the furniture in the house was hand-me-downs from the inn proper so that the house itself could have very much of been an inn.
Kaede's bedroom would have looked like a guest room itself if it didn't have a tv, a playstaion, a computer, a nice heated table, and personal items spread throughout the space. It had sliding doors, tatami mats on the floor, and she even slept in a hotel quality futon. The room was actually more messy than Makoto would have expected from Kaede, at it seemed like when every she changed her clothes she just dropped them from where she was standing and walked off.
She placed Makoto on her futon then went to her dresser and produced some pajamas. On returning she handed the clothes to Makoto. "Please lend me your phone. I'll call your parents for you while you change."
Doing as she was told, Makoto handed the phone to Kaede, who walked out of her room to make the call. Makoto sat on the futon, looked at Kaede's pajamas, then around the room. She wanted to make a memory of being in there for the first time. If her nose wasn't clogged she could smell the room better. But that didn't stop her from placing the pajamas to her face and attempting to smell them.
"I talked to your sister." Kaede spoke as soon as she came in. "She told me your parents were doing something and that they couldn't come and pick you up until late. So she asked if you could spend the night… and if I could take care of you."
Makoto gave a weak smiled again. "I hope you said yes."
"Of course I did." Kaede looked indignant. "Why haven't you changed?"
"I was looking at your room." Makoto unabashedly admitted.
Kaede gave a slight embarrassed look. "It's messy."
"I like it. It lets me get to know you better." Makoto said, then sniffed. Her nose was tickling from trying to sniff the pajama before.
"Let's get you into a bath first." Kaede decided. "I should have thought of that to begin with."
"I get to take a bath in Kaede-chan's house?" Makoto gave a cute face.
"Stop it." Kaede gave a her smile Kaede-smile. "You're supposed to be sick, remember."
During the bath, Kaede was in her room calling Maria to make sure she had picked up Makoto's things that she left at school. Then she cleaned up. Makoto of course discovered all this when she returned to the room and found it spotless. Also Kaede's mood had changed. She seemed more nervous now than she was before, and not because of Makoto being in her room. She seemed to pace around a lot and constantly asked Makoto if she wanted anything. Makoto thought she looked cute, and even admired her out-of-school clothes she had changed into as their uniforms were in the wash. While Kaede seemed less than in her usual control, Makoto was enjoying herself. She felt at home laying in Kaede's bed with the girl puttering about trying to pamper her.
When night came, Kaede had no choice but to calm down and go to bed. Makoto's heart raced as the kendo-girl snuggled in the futon next to her. It was a big enough futon for two, but they still touched each other. She could tell Kaede was a being stiff, possibly she was feeling sheepish because of Makoto being in her futon next to her.
"I hope you feel better tomorrow." Kaede spoke after awhile in the darkness.
"I feel better now." Makoto ventured.
"I've thought about sleeping with you in my bed before." Kaede spoke softly. "But you weren't sick and I could hold you."
"I wish you could hold me too." Makoto rolled on her side and looked at Kaede's silhouette. "It's been a rough day."
"Yeah." Kaede agreed.
"Kaede-chan?" Makoto mulled softly. She wanted to tell her what she discovered in the Nurses Office.
"Yes?"
Makoto paused. Is it too soon to admit something like that? I may love her but maybe saying that right now is a bit too much. I mean we just had a fight, she might think I'm just saying things off the top of my head again. We have only known each for a short time, after all. What should I do? Should I say it or not?
"Mako-chan, you're spacing out again."
"Sorry. I just… I just want to say something, bur I don't know if I should."
Makoto could feel Kaede's body stiffen. "Oh."
"Why are you so nervous?" Makoto finally asked, decided to hold off on the love statement.
"You noticed?" Kaede asked but plainly didn't answer the question.
"Am I making you feel weird?" Makoto wondered.
"No, it's not that." Kaede spoke in a flustered voice. "It's just… Fukui-san accidentally told me something that … that you haven't said yet."
Her face burning Makoto held her cheeks. "I didn't contribute to her phone-sex conversation, don't believe her."
"What? No! Not about that." Kaede sounded shock. "She said that… that you…"
Makoto felt another wave of embarrassment, but this time she didn't want to admit to something that Kaede didn't need to know yet. "What did she say?"
"She said that you love me." Kaede stammered out then quickly added. "But I told her you say things off the top of your head all the time so not to make a big deal out of it…"
"She's not lying." Makoto gave a sigh. This wasn't how she wanted to admit her feelings at all, but she didn't want to lie to Kaede. "D-Do you think I could have ran all the way to the park in the condition I was in if I didn't l-love you?"
"Mako-chan…"
"I know… it's too soon to say things like that. So I don't expect you to say it in return. I can wait."
Makoto scrunched her lips it the side of her face in the darkness. But all at once Kaede was on top of her, and her lips was pressed against hers. Even though her body was feeling light before hand, the kiss was almost like she was floating on clouds. She wrapped her arms around Kaede and returned the kiss. But once Kaede's tongue started to dance around the entrance of her mouth, Makoto's eye's widened as she remembered something crucial. She lightly pushed Kaede off of her, breathing in heavily.
"What?"
"I'm sick!" Makoto moaned. "I forgot. You can't kiss me like that yet."
"Screw it." Kaede said. "I don't care."
"Kaede-chan…"
"After everything that happened today… I don't care much for acting responsible. I want to hold you." Kaede shook her head in the dark. "The truth is… I love you too."
"I told you that you don't have to say that." Makoto prompted her. "Just because I-"
"It's not just you. I've been holding back too." Kaede quickly said. "Why do you think I felt so bad when Sora-chan kissed me?"
"You love me?" Makoto asked. "For real? You actually love me?"
"I do." Kaede nodded. "But may I ask you something? Would it be asking too much if I wanted you tell me you love me yourself. I hate that Fukui-san had to tell me, I want to hear you say it. Can you do that for me?"
"Kaede, I love you." Makoto breathed out softly. Her stomach felt like butterflies were fluttering around inside of it. Somehow actually saying it, even though Kaede already knew, felt like a big deal.
"I love you too, Makoto." Kaede whispered then followed her declaration with a kiss. Makoto didn't fight it this time. She wanted to be loved.
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