Story: Haruhi Panic! (all chapters)

Authors: Shanejayell

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Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters from the Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, I'm just borrowing them for awhile.

Haruhi Panic!

In addition to being the leader of the SOS Brigade Haruhi Suzumiya made it a point to actively research areas of related interest, such as documentation of Aliens, future men and espers. One of her favorite sources was the local bookshop, where she picked up novels and the occasional manga.

"Welcome, young lady," the older man nodded as Haruhi entered, smiling as she made a straight line towards the newest titles. Browsing through she picked up one of two favorites then paused, picking up a new book.

The cover depicted two young women, one younger and moe, another older and wiser clasping her from behind. 'Reminds me of Mikuru,' Haruhi noted as she picked it up, a slight smile appearing on her face as she remembered grabbing the other girl from behind and squeezing her breasts. She flipped through it, then added it to her growing pile of books.

Later that evening after a disappointing SOS brigade patrol of the city didn't turn up any unusual phenomena, Haruhi flopped down on her floor to read some manga. She read her usual books first then picked up the new arrival, settling in to read.

To Haruhi's surprise the book was a romance, set at a all girl's school. A young, innocent freshman caught the eye of a older girl, and their love unfolded in a charming sort of simplicity amid the plots of school life. Haruhi found herself unexpectedly charmed by the story and read on till the finish, then rolled onto her back with a sigh.

'What would that be like, I wonder...?' Haruhi mused as she felt her eyes growing weary, sleep rushing in. 'To attend a all girl's school and live that sort of life?'


When you wake up in the morning, there is a moment when your mind settles into your body and you become aware of your place in the world. For SOS brigade member Kyon this was a more important event than for most people, having been through a great deal of interesting events since joining the SOS brigade. Sleepily rising, dressing in a robe then shuffling over to the bathroom...

"Aaaaah!" Kyon yelped, gazing in stunned belief at her reflection. She was a girl! A really cute girl, at that. Long brown hair falling into her eyes, a nice bust, and a slightly more rounded face than normal...

"Big sis, why are you being so noisy?" her little sister wondered sleepily, shuffling by to brush her teeth.

'She doesn't notice anything's wrong?' Kyon blinked, wondering what exactly was going on. She cleaned up then hurried back to her room, whipping open her closet to discover her normal uniform gone, replaced by a girl's one. 'Guess I have to,' she sighed, setting about figuring out the twists and turns of the new garment.

"Big sis Kyonko, your ribbon is wrong," her little sister tisked as they headed out, the girl pausing to adjust the ribbon on the front of the girl's uniform.

"Thanks," Kyon said as she thought to herself, 'Kyonko? That's almost as bad as my regular nickname.'

Going to school was a surreal experience for the newly dubbed Kyonko. As she hurried up the hill she scanned the crowds for familiar faces only to soon realize there were no males at all. Young women chatted cheerfully, held hands and went about their day, entirely unaware that for one of them this was a journey into weirdness.

"Yo Kyonko, what's up?" the hand clapped her on the back. Taniguchi had changed nearly as much as Kyon had, looking cute in her girl's uniform, her hair a bit boyishly short.

"Yo," Kyon answered weakly. "Ah... do you feel a bit different this morning?"

Taniguchi looked perplexed, "How so?"

Kyon sighed, "Never mind."

"Morning," Kunikida nodded politely, the short boy now having become a shorter girl, wearing the traditional girl's uniform with a jacket, much like Kyon herself. It was eerie, seeing these two boys as girls, and Kyon nearly dreaded imagining who else he might see.

"Excuse me," Kyon said as they reached the school buildings themselves, "there's something I need to see."

Hurrying inside Kyon followed the first floor hallway, out to another building then up the stairs. She went down a long dark hallway and stopped at the center, hesitating before a door labeled 'Literary club.' Taking a deep breath to prepare herself for whatever she might see, Kyon opened up the door.

"I thought you'd come here," Koizumi looked up from where she was sitting with a smile, her light brown hair falling around her face.

"Urk," Kyon said weakly, her knees nearly giving way as she looked at the mildly smiling young woman. She had been hoping that Koizumi's mysterious esper boys might be unaffected, but it apparently wasn't so.

"So, how are you coping with your new gender?" Koizumi asked brightly.

Kyon's mouth dropped open, "You know!"

Koizumi nodded, "Of course." He looked thoughtful, "I've mentioned in the past that the club room had reached a saturation point, yes?"

"Yeah," Kyon took a seat, "there were so many forces in the club room that they cancel each other out, as well as not allowing anything else to appear."

"Precisely," Koizumi nodded, "I believe that same effect may also apply to you and I in this case, preventing us from being totally altered to fit this new world."

Kyon slumped a bit in her chair as she muttered, "I only saw girls coming in to school..."

"This relatively normal senior high school has become a school for girls only," Koizumi informed her, "and there are... other things going on."

"Oh?" Kyon frowned suspiciously.

Koizumi smiled, "You'd better see for yourself." As Kyon was about to protest she continued, "I think the bell's about to ring."

Fighting back a growl of irritation Kyon got up as she said, "All right, but I expect some answers out of you later."

"Enjoy your school day," the female Koizumi winked cutely, which Kyon found eerily creepy somehow.

One her way to class Kyon scanned the hallways, making note of the people there. There seemed to be a lot of hand holding going on, and outside cherry blossoms seemed to swirl around certain couples gazing into each other's eyes.

'Where are all the blossoms coming from?' Kyon found herself wondering, 'None of the trees are in bloom!'

Nearing her classroom Kyon froze, seeing a familiar figure in the hall. Ryouko Asakura's long blue-black hair shimmered as the elegant girl talked to someone her body kept hidden from view. Kyon shook her head in disbelief, remembering that Ryouko, a data entity, had been destroyed by Yuki when she attempted to kill her.

"I'll see you after your club meeting," Ryouko told her companion, shifting a bit so that Yuki Nagato came into view.

"Yes," Yuki answered in her usual dry tone, but her eyes widened a bit as she saw Kyon over Ryouko's shoulder.

"Don't forget," Ryouko murmured as she bent down, pressing her lips to Yuki's in a slow, leasurely kiss.

'Wha... wha... wha...?' Kyon thought as she blushed, slipping by the two girls as she headed to her desk, her mind blank from shock. 'What in the WORLD?'

"Kyonko!" Haruhi yelped as she got up from her seat in behind his, then grabbed at her.

"Haruhi?" Kyon blurted.

"Hmmm," Haruhi pulled her close, planting a kiss both exciting and strange on Kyon, almost as if she was the man and Kyon was the girl.

'She's accepted this world,' Kyonko guessed, 'this all seems normal to her...' Without thinking about it Kyon found herself yielding to that kiss, the two only drawing apart when their teacher cleared her throat meaningfully.

Shizuma Hanazoma turned, her white hair gleaming as she said, "Fun later, girls."

Later Kyon found herself warily heading for the clubroom, opening the door as she saw Mikuru Asahina and Yuki there along with Koizumi. Mikuru nearly leapt up as she ran to Kyon, "Are you alright?" She blushed, "No one... did anything to you?"

"No," Kyon answered, realizing that Mikuru seemed aware of the changes to the world too, "well, other than Haruhi."

"Hmm," Yuki made one of her normal, noncommital noises as she read, but a faint blush colored her cheeks.

"Koizumi, what's going on?" Kyon asked weakly.

"I'm not entirely sure," Koizumi admitted, "the Organization is scrambling, as you can imagine. Our best theory is that Haruhi has at least partially rewritten the world, subconsciously."

"So how do we change it back?" Kyon asked.

"It might be best to let the scenario play out," Koizumi said, "and see what happens."

"In other words," Kyon sighed, "we're stuck like this for awhile?"

"I'm afraid so," Koizumi agreed.

To be continued...

Chapter 2

Haruhi Panic!


Ryouko Asakura paused just outside the SOS Brigade's club room, listening in on the conversation through the old, thin walls. 'It's not really eavesdropping,' the slim, blue haired girl thought to herself mildly in justification, 'I'm just waiting out here for Yuki. It's not my fault I can hear every word.'

"So how do we change it back?" she heard Kyonko ask the others in the room and felt herself tense a bit.

"It might be best to let the scenario play out," Koizumi answered her in his usual mild tone of voice as he added, "and see what happens."

Ryouko relaxed a bit, listening to them intently. "In other words," Kyonko said with a weary sounding sigh, "we're stuck like this for awhile?"

"I'm afraid so," Koizumi agreed, sounding rather pleased by the idea, really.

"Oh great," Kyonko whimpered.

"Don't worry," MIkuru said, her voice gentle and sweet, "we'll do our best to help you adapt, Kyon!"

'If you think it's strange for all of you,' Ryouko thought to herself bitterly as she leaned up against the hallway wall, 'imagine what it might be like to be deleted first.' Before this morning she had been non-existant, wiped out from reality by Yuki's superior data manipulation abilities. But somehow in Haruhi's latest rebooting of the world she had been recreated once more, and hilariously cast as Yuki's lover.

Almost as if she knew that Ryouko was thinking about her Haruhi Suzumiya strode up the hallway, her short brown hair held back by a golden hairband and dressed in the usual school uniform. . "Asakura," Haruhi nodded a greeting as she asked her, "are you waiting for Yuki?"

"Yes, President," Ryouko replied, smiling slightly. While she needed to treat Haruhi with a certain degree of caution, she couldn't resist teasing her just a bit. 'Besides,' she hid a smile as she thought, 'any reactions I do get might be useful in our research.'

"Don't start with that, class President," Haruhi shot back with a smile. She reached for the door then hesitated as she quietly asked, "Ryouko...?"

"Yes?" Ryouko looked at her curiously.

Haruhi met her eyes with a slight blush coloring her cheeks. "Yuki is my friend," she said quietly, "I hope you're taking good care of her."

Ryouko felt a minor burst of surprise, beginning deep within her and spreading outward. 'Haruhi is worried about Yuki?' she thought, stunned, 'But I thought Haruhi didn't care about it...' Noting Haruhi's confused look Ryouko realized she was taking too long to answer, "I'm sorry, you surprised me." Clearing her throat she added, "I care for Yuki very much."

Haruhi gave a relieved smile, "Good!" She opened the door as she addressed Ryouko over her shoulder, "I'll let Yuki know you're waiting."

"Thank you," Ryouko bowed slightly.

Haruhi paused as she was about to go in, "Ryouko, have you ever considered joining the SOS Brigade?"

Ryouko smiled back sweetly as she lied, "I thought it might be better if Yuki had a place to go to without her girlfriend, occasionally."

Haruhi nodded as she headed the rest of the way in, "Fair enough."

Ryouko listened intently to Haruhi's entrance and her enthusiastic kiss to a mildly reluctant Kyonko. 'Poor girl,' Ryouko smiled wryly, 'I wonder if she remembers the old world or not?' By the sound of her confused objections Ryouko guessed the original Kyon was still in there.

Mikuru also objected to Haruhi's public lewdness and eventually the brigade leader settled down. Haruhi called the meeting to order and they had a slightly shorter than usual meeting in which Haruhi urged the others to look harder for the mysteriously elusive Aliens, Espers, Sliders and Time travellers.

'Open your eyes,' Ryouko urged mentally, 'they're right there in front of you.'

"All right," Haruhi loudly declared, "the meeting is dismissed!" Then Ryouko had to fight back a laugh as she heard Haruhi purr, "Kyonko!"

"Yes?" Kyonko answered warily.

"You didn't forget about our date this afternoon?" Haruhi asked

"Date?" Kyonko yelped then Ryouko heard her clearing her throat. "Of course not," the young woman replied nervously, "what time did you want to meet?"

"Around six," Haruhi said cheerfully, "we can go out for a snack then... you can take me home."

Before Ryouko could hear any more of that interesting conversation Yuki opened the club's door, the light blue haired girl looking at her calmly. "Ryouko," Yuki said expressionlessly, "thank you for waiting for me."

Ryouko stepped up to fold Yuki into her arms, once again surprised at how right it felt, holding her. "I missed you, Yuki," she purred, sliding a hand along her cheek.

Yuki met her eyes, unnamed emotions swirling in them as she whispered, "And I, you."

Tilting Yuki's face up a bit Ryouko kissed her lingeringly, pressing their lips together as she wrapped her arms around the smaller girl. "Oh," Ryouko sighed as she finally broke off the kiss, "I needed that."

Kyonko was blushing furiously, looking away in that awkward way that showed he'd been watching avidly while they were kissing. Haruhi had a rather thoughtful look that spelled a interesting night for Kyonko, while Mikuru looked like she might faint from blood rushing to her brain. Only Koizumi looked like he might not be buying their passion, and Ryouko firmly reminded herself not to underestimate him.

'Those esper boys always seem to know more than what's good for them,' Ryouko thought as she gently guided Yuki off down thre hall, holding hands.

"Was that really necessary?" Yuki asked softly, her lips barely moving as they made their way from the old building and through the school.

"Of course it was," Ryouko answered honestly as they went outside into the sun, "Haruhi has to believe we're involved with each other." She linked her arm with Yuki's and walked close to her, savoring the other girl's sweet scent.

"Hmm," Yuki replied, not quite agreeing with Ryouko, but importantly not disagreeing either.

Ryouko smiled as they walked together, one couple amid a crowd of cheerful romantic girls, many of whom were also coupled together. "Did you receive a response from the Data Entity?" she asked curiously.

Yuki nodded shortly as she reported, "The Data Entity is impressed by Haruhi's manipulation of both subtle and gross aspects of this new reality." They followed the crowds down the hill, eventually peeling off at the park and heading towards their apartment building.

"THe subtle being the memory changes," Ryouko guessed accurately as she mused, "and the gross being the gender switch and other reality edits."

"Exactly," Yuki agreed. "I preformed a new internet search on the school, all the sites I accessed showed it has a long history as a girl's school."

As they used their password to get into the building Yuki noted the odd sensation of having twin tracks of memories. On one hand she recalled her original life where she had lived here all alone, but now she also had equally valid memories of cohabiting for several months with Ryouko in what could almost be described as wedded bliss.

"Are you all right?" Ryouko asked her gently as she watched Yuki hesitate in unlocking the front door.

Yuki nodded slightly as she turned the knob open, "Just preparing myself."

The formally empty style of decorating Yuki had favored was no longer present, instead the apartment now had a much more feminine touch. Decorative items like plants and sculptures were littered about, screens separated sections of the room and there was more furniture than Yuki's low table and two pillows.

"Wow," Ryouko looked around avidly, "it looks just like I remembered." Her lips twisted in a wry smile as she added, "Despite the fact that this is the very first time I've seen it."

"Hmm," Yuki nodded, feeling oddly comforted knowing Ryouko was also having issues with memory.

"Come on," Ryouko took Yuki's hand and pulled her through the suite as she said cheerfully, "I want to see our bedroom!"

The bedroom was as changed as the rest of the apartment. The plain, inexpensive futon Yuki used to occasionally lay down on was gone, replaced by a plush, fancy semi-double bed that might be used for newlyweds. In addition to the larger bed there were fancy pillows and blankets, as well as a small wooden case beside the bed.

A blush stole across Yuki's face as memories relating to the box cascaded through her mind. "Is that...?" she couldn't quite complete the thought.

Ryouko flipped the top open and peered inside. "Yes," she noted in a normal, conversational tone of voice, "it appears we have a extensive collection of sex toys."

Yuki looked in too as she murmured partially to herself, "What sort of things has Haruhi been reading?"

Ryouko frowned thoughtfully as she mused, "Well, we do know she spends a fair bit of time looking on the internet every day... it's quite possible she picked it up from there." She began to catalog the items softly, "Butt plug, dildo and harness, massage oil, nipple clamps..."

"Hmm," the faintly blushing Yuki said, wrestling with some very explicit Haruhi created memories of using those devices on Ryouko, not to mention Ryouko using a few on her.

Ryouko looked up at Yuki thoughtfully, "You know, we have no idea when reality will revert..."

"Oh?" Yuki kept any nervousness out of her voice.

"I'm sure the integrated Data Thought Entity might be interested in the new experiences we could produce with these," Ryouko smiled slightly wickedly, "first hand, so to speak."

"I...," Yuki hesitated, knowing that Ryouko did have a valid point. "All right," she conceded then added firmly, "but I'm in charge first."

Ryouko smiled, "Whatever you say, mistress."

To be continued?

Chapter 3

Haruhi Panic!


"Haruhi!" Mikuru Asahina yelped as Haruhi Suzumiya nearly groped poor Kyonko, the smaller brown haired girl weakly struggling in her grasp.

Haruhi looked up at her innocently as if what she was doing to Kyonko was in no way unusual and asked, "What is it?"

Koizumi Itsuki had a wry smile on her face as she murmured, "Miss President, I believe you wanted to talk about sliders today?"

Mikuru puffed out a relieved sigh as Haruhi was distracted from groping the other woman. 'This situation is completely insane,' she thought mournfully, blushing as she noticed how close Haruhi was sitting with Kyonko.

Soon Mikuru left the SOS Brigade club room, her cheeks nearly glowing red as she tried to escape what was going on around her. It had been strange and distressing enough seeing the usually staid and stoic Yuki kissing Ryouko Asakura, but it was even more disturbing seeing Haruhi chasing poor Kyon. Or Kyonko, she supposed she should say.

It was even more confusing trying to sort out the confusing memories she now had! The equipment provided by her superiors should have protected her from this kind of retroactive memory overwrite, but instead she found herself confused by dual sets of memories. The original SOS Brigade memories mostly made sense, but the others...

"Mikuru," Koizumi caught up ith her, her long brown hair flowing around her face. "I'm glad I caught up with you," she smiled winningly.

"Y.. y... yes?" Mikuru stammered shyly.

"I noticed Haruhi paired herself with Kyonko and Yuki with Ryouko," Koizumi noted as they walked together, "have you determined if she paired you up?"

"I...," Mikuru was a bit shocked at the flash of curious interest in the other girl's eyes but she honestly answered, "I'm not sure, yet." She frowned thoughtfully, "I have some very odd memories around Tsuruya, I think."

Koizumi nodded thoughtfully yet she also looked a bit disappointed, "That would make sense." She smiled at Mikuru as she added, "You'd better head home, or you might run into her and have a encounter you're not ready for."

Mikuru blushed as she nodded, "Ri... right!"

After a short walk Mikuru reached her home with a certain degree of relief, opening up the front door and walking inside. "Oooh!' a soft sound came to her ears as Mikuru reached the living room, making her stop with a frown.

'What was that?' Mikuru thought to herself nervously as she carefully advanced deeper into the normally quiet apartment.

Another, familiar voice moaned, "That's SO nice!"

Eyes wide with fear and dread Mikuru timidly advanced, realizing that all the noises were coming from the bedroom. She reached the nearly shut door and pushed it open to take a peek inside... before nearly suffering a total brain freeze.

What looked like a older version of Mikuru herself was sprawled on the western style bed! NAKED! With her friend Tsuruya laying on top of her, the equally naked girl sucking on her larger breasts with a ardent passion. Their moans and gasps of delight were so loud they couldn't hear anything else, and it took a bit for older Mikuru to see her.

"Oh, Mikuru," the older woman gasped, "I didn't realize you'd be home so soon,"

Tsuruya reluctantly left off from her ardent worship of the woman's breasts. "I'm sorry," the green haired girl said with her usual fang driven lisp, "but your mom was so sexy, Mikuru! I just couldn't help myself!"

'That's not my mom,' Mikuru's brain jibbered to herself, 'that's me from another time-frame! But why was she visiting here?' Aloud she could barely manage to say, "Ca-cla-classified information!"

Part of Mikuru knew she should just get out of the room but she was frozen with shock, stunned and just a little turned on. Taking advantage of her shock Tsuruya swithly climbed off the bed, the sweaty young woman grabbing Mikuru by the arm.

"Wait, what...?" Mikuru yelped.

Tsuruya dragged her towards the bed, "Come on, Megas!"

"Eh!" Mikuru yelped, "No! No no no no no!" she squealed even as she was pushed forward and tumbled down onto her older self.

"Yes!" Tsuruya yelled as she pounced on top of her and began to gently remove the struggling girl's clothes.

"Help!" Mikuru yelped to her older self.

Surprisingly, the elder Mikuru helped restrain the girl so Tsuruya could finish striping her. "Don't worry," she purred into her younger self's ear, "just think of it as a kind of... masturbation."

"Noooooo!" Mikuru wailed.


Tsuruya slipped away after a few hours and Mikuru fell into a guilt ridden sleep not long afterwards. Sunlight through the windows finally woke Mikuru up, laying on her messy bed as she tried to tell herself that the last night was a dream. Then she realized that the older Mikuru was still there!

'Oh no...,' Mikuru mentally whimpered as various events from the night before flickered through her mind. The threesome had been bad enough, but when Tsuruya left to get the cucumbers!

"Are you all right?" the older Mikuru put her hand on the younger's shoulder.

"No, I am not all right," Mikuru sniffled, fighting back tears.

Mikuru smiled fondly down at her younger self, "You got over being glomped by Haruhi and the computer club mess, you'll get over this too."

"Eeep," the younger Mikuru's eyes widened in memory.

"What?" the other woman asked.

Mikuru blushed pinkly. "A new set of memories for when Haruhi grabbed us," she muttered.

"Ah," the elder Mikuru nodded as she experienced those memories too. "Oooh," she added thoughtfully, "Haruhi has good hands."

"Don't say that!" Mikuru whimpered. She sighed as she looked around for her clothes, "Do we still have therapists in our time? Because I think I'm going to need one."

Older Mikuru watch her other self dress, her own memories rather chaotic at the moment. She felt reasonably certain this reality change wouldn't last forever, but like other Haruhi changes it extended into other time frames. For as long as this change existed, the elder Mikuru's memories would be consistant with it.

Mikuru tried to get the wrinkles out of her clothes as she said, "Please, try to stay here all right? We don't want to risk any more disruptions."

The elder Mikuru put on her bra as she shrugged, "I'll do my best."

Mikuru whimpered softly, not sure how to take that reassurance. Finishing dressing she hurried to the bathroom to tidy her hair and wash up then was off to school, silently fretting over what else might happen.

Back at the house older Mikuru finished dressing, feeling a slight pang of regret over the trauma she had put her younger self through. Still, it wasn't like she had a lot of choice: history had to play out in it's original form, or the future she came from might never come to be.

"Heh," the older Mikuru smirked as she headed to the kitchen to make some breakfast, "Mikuru has no idea what else is waiting for her today."

Bing bong! The doorbell rang and Mikuru moved to open it. The mail woman blinked as she took in the sexy woman, her own not unimpressive figure restrained by the traditional uniform. "Hi," the younger woman looked Mikuru over hungrily, "I have a delivery to make."

"Come on in," Mikuru purred, liking how the day was proceeding.

To be continued... ?

Notes: Yes, I'm writing Mikuru as being smarter than she appears. I'm one of the Haruhi fans that figures the 'moe Mikuru' thing is at least in part an act to help keep a handle on Kyon. Also, I see older Mikuru as the more 'normal personality' of the two, in that she is not acting in a role. Or at least not as much as the younger Mikuru is. Your Mileage May Vary, of course.

Chapter 4

Haruhi Panic!


Itsuki Koizumi felt a certain regret as she left Mikuru, a feeling that honestly surprised the young esper. In the original reality Koizumi had been focused on keeping an eye on Suzumiya, but even then had at least noticed Mikuru's more bountiful... assets. Now that Kyonko and Suzumiya were paired up, the way seemed clear for her to show that interest, but alas it was not to be.

'I need to concentrate on my job,' Koizumi reminded herself firmly, 'not on romance. I wonder if anyone in the Organization has determined a method to turn us back to normal?'

The strange gender shifting had hit the psychic Organization, though thankfully not all that badly. Only the agents in direct contact with North High were hit, though agents connected to them were also suffering related memory changes. Koizumi herself was dealing with doubled memories of both her lives, making things a little confusing.

Koizumi returned to her home, nodding a polite greeting to her parents. Neither had noticed the gender shift, once again demonstrating the incredible power possessed by Haruhi Suzumiya. 'Though they never noticed I was a easper either,' Koizumi noted wryly as she entered her room.

The afternoon and evening went on like always, though Koizumi found her new gender giving things a slightly surreal touch. They had dinner as her father droned on about work, then her mother smiled at how pretty Koizumi was getting. As soon as possible Koizumi retreated to her room, doing her homework while keeping an eye on her phone.

So far at least, there had been no new incidents of Closed Space, though no one knew if that state of affairs would continue. The creation of Closed Space seemed to be driven by the negative emotions of Suzumiya, and she seemed oddly content in this new world of hers. Of course there was no way to know how long this calm would last, which made Koizumi rather nervous.

The phone rang, and gracefully Koizumi picked it up, noting the call display thoughtfully. "This is Koizumi," she answered calmly.

"Koizumi," Mori answered, sighing, "I need to see you."

The blacked haired young woman was Koizumi's senior in the Organization, as well as one of the two agents who most often assisted her. More had helped with the 'Remote Island' scenario they had played out for Suzumiya, as well as turning up where needed to help. She was calm, cool and very capable, which was why Koizumi was a bit surprised to hear strain in her voice now.

"Is this a Suzumiya related problem?" Koizumi asked.

"No," Mori started then hesitated, "well, I suppose yes."

Koizumi raised her eyebrows slightly as she asked, "What can I do to help?"

"Thank you," Mori sighed quietly. She hesitated a moment, "Wait in front of your house, I'll pick you up."

"Will do," Koizumi nodded.

In a casual dress and carrying a purse Koizumi headed out, telling her parents she might be out for a bit. The night air was cool as Koizumi stood out on the street, a slight breeze blowing her long brown hair around her.

The black car pulled up a few moments later, the old man Arakawa driving. He had a slightly wry smile as he nodded hello, "Mori is in the back."

"Thank you," Koizumi opened the door, sliding inside then shutting the door behind her and instinctively smoothing her skirt down.

Mori turned towards her, a smile tugging on her lips as she nodded hello. "Anything else happen since this morning's report?" she asked briskly.

Koizumi turned towards Mori, "Not much, ma'am. I did a quik visual survey of the school, it appears the majority of women are all now lesbians."

Mori shook her head wryly, "I still find it hard to believe that North High was once mixed gendered. Does anyone else remember this?"

"The others in the SOS Brigade," Koizumi noted, "other than Suzumiya herself."

Mori nodded, frowning slightly, her gaze flickering to Koizumi's face. "And it could be that Suzumiya knows, but is just playing along," she noted as a slight blush colored her cheeks, "as if she were dreaming."

"That is also a possibility," Koizumi conceded the point. "Suzumiya is still a mystery to us," she admitted ruefully.

Mori studied her thoughtfully a moment. "Do you think it might be worthwhile to try to 'jar' Suzumiya from her fantasy?" she asked.

"I think it would be very dangerous," Koizumi admitted after a few seconds thought. "Her abilities are too unpredictable, we really cannot know what would happen."

"I see," Mori nodded.

As they talked, Koizumi noticed that Mori seemed uncomfortable, somehow. She studied Koizumi intently, fidgeting in her seat, then she would look away for long moments. It was all quite strange behavior for the usually cool agent.

Koizumi looked at Mori thoughtfully as she asked, "When you called, you said it wasn't a Suzumiya related problem?"

Mori pushed her short hair back, frowning as she tapped on the divider. "Arakawa, how far do we have to go?" she asked, ignoring Koizumi's question for a moment.

"We're nearly there miss," Arakawa responded calmly, "shall I leave you there?"

"Please do," Mori said as the car rolled to a stop in a secluded spot not far from town, possibly in a small park.

"What...?" Koizumi started when the old man parked the car and got out.

"Have a good night," Arakawa tipped his hat then ambled off into the darkness.

Mori puffed out a relieved sigh, drawing Koizumi's attention back to the attractive woman. "I thought he'd never leave," she said, then reached out and grabbed at Koizumi.

"Meep!" Koizumi made a soft, incoherent noise as Mori yanked her towards her, then all sound was silenced as they kissed.

Mori kissed deeply and aggressively, pushing Koizumi down beneath her on the car seat as they writhed together. Koizumi moaned weakly as a hand cupped her breast, then she shuddered as Mori boldly slid up her skirt.

As the two of them made out those frustrating 'double memories' that the SOS brigade had came into play, and Koizumi suddenly 'remembered' she had been having an intense affair with Mori. 'Suzumiya, you have a very sick mind,' she thought as the other woman aggressively straddled her.

"Mori, wait," Koizumi gasped as Mori finally broke the kiss.

"Don't tease me," Mori said as she crouched above her, "we always go out like this..."

"Actually, no we don't," Koizumi said quickly, "Suzumiya did this!"

"Huh?" Mori sat back on Koizumi's legs, looking befuddled. Then her eyes widened, "You mean when she changed you into a girl she paired us up?"

Koizumi was surprised at how nice it felt, having Mori's ass on her thighs, then firmly banished that thought. "I think so," she answered.

Mori had the oddest look on her face, as if she was trying to decide if Koizumi was joking. "You didn't sneak into my room on the island and...?" she trailed off.

Koizumi's cheeks went bright red as those memories flashed back before her. Mori had been more playful than usual dressed in the maid outfit, then one thing led to another and Koizumi found herself tied to the bedposts.

"I never knew you were that kinky," Koizumi murmured aloud.

"Hush!" Mori growled, blushing again. She climbed off Koizumi with a pout as she muttered, "Well, that pretty much killed the mood."

Koizumi sat up, sighing as she said, "Sorry." She reviewed her new memories a few times as she mused, "So every few nights Arakawa picks us up, drives us somewhere remote and you have your way with me?"

"Yes," Mori was blushing again as she growled, "And you're only just remembering this?"

"I'm sorting through two completely different sets of memories," Koizumi told her patiently, "it gets rather confusing."

"True enough," Mori conceded, her tone gentling slightly as she mused "it must all be terribly confusing to you."

"Very," Koizumi rubbed her temples. She had never expected to discover that Mori had such a wild side, and she wasn't sure she'd ever be able to look at the other woman the same way again.

Mori opened up the bar built into the seat as she noted, "We're going to have to wait until Arakawa gets back, would you care for a drink?"

"Please," Koizumi nodded, "how long will he be gone?"

"About a hour or so," Mori said grumpily. "Damn it! I wanted to get LAID tonight!"

Koizumi sweatdropped as she filled a small glass. "I'm sorry that I'm a little uncomfortable with this whole situation," she answered.

"It's a bit strange for me too," Mori shot back, "when it looks like the person I sleep with is no longer interested." She refilled her glass and tossed it back.

Koizumi put a hand on her arm, "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," Mori admitted, sipping her drink this time.

Koizumi finished her own drink, feeling a warm glow spreading out from her stomach. More she was also aware she was faintly turned on from their brief encounter, and at least part of her body was still interested. "Mori...," she started.

Mori had crossed her legs, her skirt rising up to reveal pale thighs. "Yes?" she answered as Mori looked back at Koizumi curiously.

"I wouldn't mind trying things out," Koizumi admitted shyly, "if you would be willing to take things a bit slower."

Mori smiled warmly as she kissed Koizumi much more gently. "I can do slow," she promised.


As Kyonko entered the clubroom, she blinked to see Koizumi already there. Oddly the young woman looked a bit the worse for wear, with bags under her eyes and a large bruise on her neck. "Is that a hickey?" she had to ask.

Koizumi blushed, wishing the girl's uniform had a higher collar. "Don't ask, please," she sighed. Under her breath Koizumi muttered, "Slow my ass."

"Eh?" Kyonko blinked.

"Never mind," Koizumi sighed ruefully.

To be continued...

Notes: Mori in this is based somewhat on the Haruhi-chan version, where she assists Koizumi pretty often. Not lesbian or bi, as far as I know, though she has a interesting rivalry going on with Mikuru's friend Tsuruya.

Chapter 5

Haruhi Panic!

Kyonko Returned.

The stairway leading up to North High's roof was deserted, which was exactly why Kyonko and Haruhi were fooling around on the stairs. Kyonko moaned as Haruhi nibbled on her neck, sucking on her skin hard enough to leave a hickey.

"Haruhi...," Kyonko moaned breathlessly as she was kissed at the base of her neck, then Haruhi undid the girl's tie and pulled her shirt open, pausing to admire her breasts.

"As much as I like Mikuru's figure," Haruhi mused, "more than a mouthful just goes to waste."

Kyonko tried to form a coherent thought but Haruhi then cupped her smaller breasts, squeezing gently. With a obvious hunger she licked across the firm flesh of her breasts, then began to ardently suck on Kyonko's firm nipples.

"Ah!" Kyonko arched her back, panting even as Haruhi slid a hand up her skirt.

"Do you want me to...?" Haruhi abandoned the throbbing nipples as she cupped Kyonko's wet sex in her hand, stroking gently.

"Oh kami...," Kyonko moaned, her legs spreading automatically.

Karuhi pressed against the wet cleft with her fingers, then squeezed the hard little clitty. "Well?" she purred into Kyonko's ear.

"Yes!" Kyonko gasped, bucking her hips slightly, "Yes, please!"

"I thought you'd never ask," Haruhi purred as she pulled the now soaking panties aside and drove two fingers in.

Kyon pulled Haruhi close, her hips moving with each of Haruhi's thrusts even as she wailed sweetly in pleasure.


The lunchtime meeting of the SOS Brigade lacked Haruhi, which was exactly as thev four young women had planned. Their fearless leader was off having a meeting with another group, Haruhi apparently plotting a take over, and that should occupy her for the time being.

Kyonko winced as she sat down, her... nether regions still sore for this morning. 'Damn it Haruhi, do you have to be so rough?' she thought, sipping the cup of tea Mikuru had poured for her.

"Good news everyone," Koizumi said with her usual cheerful smile, "with information we provided, the Organization had determined what triggered the reality change."

"Really?" Mikuru asked excitedly.

"Yes, and while the memories of the members following Haruhi may be suspect," Koizumi conceded, "we think they are accurate."

"Wait," Kyonko blinked as she realized, "you have people following Haruhi?"

Koizumi gave Kyonko a patient look, "She can potentially change reality on a whim, of COURSE we are following her."

Kyonko didn't look happy about it but she conceded, "Good point."

"So what was it?" Mikuru asked with a surprising degree of impatience. Apparently having Tsuruya as a lover wasn't as fun as it appeared.

"Haruhi went into a bookstore the day before we SOS Brigade members noticed the changes. Along with her usual manga purchases, Haruhi picked up a yuri manga called Strawberry Panic," Koizumi relayed the information.

"Yuri?" Mikuru blinked, thinking of lilies.

Yuki Nagato was still reading one of her usual phone book sized novels in the corner by the window as she calmly said, "Yuri in this case refers to a genre of manga and anime that features women or girls having sex together."

Mikuru blushed furiously as she stammered, "Thank you."

"So just reading a manga about girl's love was enough to make her change reality?" Kyonko asked disbelievingly. She shook her head as she muttered, "If just that can inspire her to change the world, we're in deep trouble."

"My superiors believe that it was one of several factors involved, including a sudden creation of Closed Space," Koizumi noted. She sighed, "But yes, it clearly indicates we'll need to monitor what Haruhi reads somewhat more closely."

"So how does that help us?" Kyonko asked.

Koizumi looked at her with a slight smile as she said mildly, "Why, I should think it would be obvious."

Kyonko gave her a flat look as she said, "Spell it out for me."

Koizumi looked faintly amused as she explained, "It seems that we need to expose Haruhi to a entertainment featuring heterosexual couples, ideally one that grabs her attention enough to trigger another reality change."

"Hopefully putting us all back to normal," Mikuru murmured faintly.

"And not turning Haruhi, Mikuru and Yuki into boys," Kyonko muttered, shuddering. Haruhi was aggressive enough already!

"That would be a unfortunate outcome," Koizumi conceded.

"So do we just drag her off to the book store or...?" Kyonko asked curiously.

"Today is the day she usually goes shopping for books," Itsuki said smugly, "and my fellow agents have hit all the local book sellers. We're quite confident that this strategy will work."

Kyonko sat back, sighing softly. "Somehow," she muttered to herself, "I just know this isn't going to go as planned."

Before anyone else could comment the door banged open, Haruhi charging in as she cried, "Hello, everybody!" She was nearly dragging a black haired girl behind her, though the new girl had a wry smile on her face.

Kyonko frowned as she demanded, "Who did you kidnap now?"

"I didn't kidnap anyone," Haruhi said with a smile, "this is Chikaru Minamoto, of the school's Transformation club!"

"Hello everyone," Chikaru smiled, the red bows in her hair giving her a moe aspect, "I hope you'll all agree to wear our wonderful costumes."

"Oh no," Kyonko sighed, running a hand across her face.


Haruhi Suzumiya frowned as she looked over the book store, mildly appalled at how boring the stock was this week. Someone had clearly offloaded their set of Maison Ikkoku onto the used books section, and most of the new books were romantic pap like Boys Over Flowers, Host Club and others. Not that she minded that stuff TOO much, but having all the books be like that was kind of odd.

Flipping through the manga disinterestedly Haruhi shifted stacks of books on the table, looking for something to catch her eye. A book thumped to the floor, and as she bent down to pick it up Haruhi noticed a book left lying under the tale.

Picking it up Haruhi brushed away at the dust, her eyes widening slightly. The cover of blue haired men and women looked interesting, especially the poor seemingly normal guy in the middle. Flipping it over she read the summary, nodding thoughtfully to herself.

"I'd like to buy this," Haruhi nodded to the young woman at the counter. Oddly she reminded Haruhi of the maid back at the island she and the SOS Brigade had vacationed at, but it had to be her imagination.

"Oh, uhm," Mori looked at dismay at the book, "it seems slightly dinged. Wouldn't you prefer a newer manga?"

Haruhi shook her head, "Nah, they all looked lame. I want this one."

"Of course," Mori nodded, ringing it through then putting it into a bag, "have a nice day."

Humming to herself cheerfully Haruhi headed home, nodding warmly to her parents then heading up to her room. She did her homework first, as usual, then watched a bit of anime. Finally she shut off the TV and lay down on her bed, flipping the manga open and starting reading.

The story was complex but interesting, pulling Haruhi in instantly. The human flung in amoung aliens plot was fascinating, and she liked both human and alien characters. As the manga came to a end she was literally pouting with annoyance, wondering what the next book would be like. Reluctantly she set the manga aside and settled down to sleep, her mind alive with visions of the future...


When you wake up in the morning, there is a moment when your mind settles into your body and you become aware of your place in the world. For SOS brigade member Kyon this was a more important event than for most people, having been through a great deal of interesting events since joining the SOS brigade.

This morning, however, Kyon had no chance to sleepily adjust as he was awakened by a blaring alarm. Kyon tumbled out of his bunk, looking around wildly as he stumbled to his feet. 'Well, I'm not Kyonko ant more,' he thought with some relief, grabbing the uniform from the rack by his bed. Kyon dressed himself with the ease of long practice then slipped his boots on and hurried out into the hall.

Itsuki Koizumi was just running by as Kyon exited, both of them falling into step. "Any idea what's going on?" Koizumi asked as they hurried.

"Not a clue," Kyon answered gruffly as they ran to a lift and jumped in. "Bridge!" he ordered and the lift took off.

"It looks like we're in outer space," Koizumi noted, "it appears our plan has gone awry."

"This is Haruhi we're dealing with," Kyon noted dryly, "they usually do."

The two men ran from the lift to the bridge, both still running on instinct rather than memory. They knew what to do, even if they didn't know how. The bridge was busy with oddly familiar figures at different posts, including Nagato at the helm and the poor Computer Club president as the ship's science officer.

"Commander Koizumi, Lt. Commander Kyon, it's about time you got here," Haruhi declared as she got up from the Captain's chair, "it's time to defeat the aliens!"

"Oy," Kyon sighed to himself, running a hand over his face before rushing to his position as tactical officer.

Never the End...

Notes: Chikaru Minamoto is also from Strawberry Panic, and runs the Transformation Club, which basically amounts to a cosplay club. Considering Haruhi's fondness for dressing up Mikuru I could easily see a alliance like this form.

The manga Haruhi picked up is Crest of the Stars/Banner of the Stars, a trilogy of SF manga by Toshihiro Ono. Strongly recommended, and out in English by Tokyo Pop, also referred to as the Seikai Trilogy. The aliens are very well thought out and the plot is very clever.

"Never the End..." is a reference to the 'Miyuki-chan in Wonderland' manga by Clamp. In each episode the heroine falls into a alternate world, various things happen and she escapes. The stories always end with "Never the End" and a twist tossing Miyuki into yet another situation.

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