a different intimacy
The storm swept through my cherry blossoms garden. I sighed and watched helplessly as the beauty slowly faded. I tried my best to participate in the dance of the cherry-blossom-rain but I fell to the ground alone at the end.
Nearly thrown into the back of the limo, I gazed at Mari’s face with eyes like a fawn caught in high beam headlights.
She quickly got in next to me. The door was shut. Within a few seconds, the limo began to move. Mari quickly pressed the intercom: “Drive around town a few times before dropping us at school.”
“Understood, Miss Kanazuki,” came the emotionlessly polite response from the driver.
I threw my head back trying to at least to appear to be defiant. I closed my eyes to recall and savor my time spent with Ryoko.
“Why did you run away from me?” Mari said. “You had me worried the entire night.”
Some jarring image shoved aside the images of my happiness. There was something familiar about this situation…
“I dunno.” I said. I kept my mouth shut after that. Mari asked me a couple more questions but I was determined to remain silent. She sighed in turn and leaned back. Kicking off her flats, she threw her shroud off her shoulder and lifted her legs high up in the air, not caring that my eyes fell on her body under the nightie. Her legs were completely bare as the lower portion of her nightie fell all the way to her waist. I couldn’t hold back my gaze on her black lacy panties. The thin fabric did nothing to deter my imagination.
Something flashed in my head again. I could’ve sworn that I’ve been in a similar situation before.
Mari pressed a button on the armrest and a golden, shiny footbath slid out from under her seat. There were intricate patterns of cherry blossoms, spring flowers and animals inside and outside of the footbath. She gave a loud sigh very much unlike the way she usually does, and thrust her feet into the bath, which caused the water to splash and some of it got onto my face and my jammies.
Her small feet were so cute. She wiggled her toes and winked at me. “Wanna try?”
Without waiting for my response, she leaned over and pressed a button on the armrest on my side. Only inches away, her breasts were barely hidden under the thin fabric of her nightgown. Her pink areola and nipples were just visible enough to make me frustrated.
I shook my head, disgusted at my lust for my best friend’s body. To make the matters worse, I was a girl and she was a girl. I shuddered realizing that I almost did it with Ryoko, who was someone I admired. I really shouldn’t have had sexual impulses toward her.
Mari snatched my feet and flipped my slippers off, her fingers slide across my soles and I couldn’t help myself but giggle. To my wide-eyed surprise, she wiggled her fingers.
“Coochie coochie coo…” She whispered in my left ear as her devilish fingers traced my arch and the sole, as well as pinching my toes and tickling my toe pads.
“Stop! Please!” a shiver ran up my spine and I began to laugh uncontrollably. All of the sudden, she let go of my feet and they fell into the footbath. The water splashed onto her face and her nightgown.
Mari laughed like a mad woman, which surprised me. Then, leaning back into her seat, she let out another sigh of relief.
“I’m so glad I can be me in front of you.” She said.
Next, once again to my surprise, she took me into her arms and cradled my head in her bosom.
“I…I’m not…” I began to protest.
She put a finger to my lips. “You ARE worthy. So don’t resist.” She said. The gentleness in her voice sent waves of soothing relief into my brain. “But I…”
“None of that.” She said. She ran her slim fingers through my long and silky raven hair and started stroking my head tenderly.
I closed my eyes. I couldn’t tell if Mari was wearing perfume or not. The wonderful smell that began to envelop around me was a distant but familiar flowery scent. I would’ve called it some kind of sensual invasion but it was more like a warm welcome. It was different from Ryoko’s scent, which was strong and passionate like the ocean. Mari’s scent was soft, sweet and almost undetectable. But one could not mistake her scent with anyone else. I was drowning in Ryoko’s love but I was basking in Mari’s.
Next thing I knew, despite myself, I kissed Mari’s left breast delicately. She uttered a small note of pleasure. I looked up and she smiled at me.
“So you do remember.” She said. “Alas, it’s time to change into our uniforms, hon.” She smiled and gently laid me back to my side of the seat. Taking off her nightgown, her breasts were completely exposed. I became mesmerized with their perfect shapes and sizes. The shade of pink for her areola and nipples were just right in my eyes. They were the right size for my mouth to suckle and tease. My heart jumped and I involuntarily moved toward her (at least I thought my body moved on its own) and tried to kiss her left breast again, but she gently and firmly held me back.
“Put on your uniform.” She said.
I sighed in frustration and muttered: “Yes, Mari.”
She was the queen, after all. One did not access the queen’s secret sanctum without special permission. In ancient times, Japanese princesses were confided in a small but tasteful room in the top of the castle and were not allowed to leave the room most of the time. One would need really special permission to see her.
I bit my lower lip as Mari slowly disappear into that cursed restraint called school uniform. She finished her tie and waist chain in expert-like fashion and then came over to help me. I wanted to put my feet into her footbath for a quick foot play but she had already wiped her feet with the towel hanging on the window hook and put on her socks; the footbath had already retracted back under her seat. Sighing, I press the button on my armrest. Watching the footbath retract, I slowly and unwillingly dried my feet with the towel hanging from my side of the window and put on my socks. Thanks to Mari, I didn’t fall or tie myself up with my uniform.
We arrived at the school without any more verbal or physical exchanges. I realized that neither one of us had bothered to wipe the water splashed from the footbaths off our faces.
The twilight in between
My dread exploded in my chest as soon mari and I stepped out of her limo. I heaved a heavy sigh as I strolled forward alongside her. Mari seemed to be oblivious of my state of mind as she continued to walk.
As soon as we enter the school gate, the gushes and exclamations from other students began to shower on us, or rather, on her.
“Look it’s Miss Kanazuki!”
“My gosh, how beautiful!”
“Damn, isn’t that Kanazuki Mari? She’s hot!”
“Good morning, Miss Kanazuki!”
Mari greeted back.
“Look at those legs.”
Some guy gushed.
I felt sick seeing my best friend being visually ogled by men. But I had bigger worries welling up my throat. I braced myself.
“What is that next to Miss Kanazuki?” “I dunno. A straw with glasses?” “You mean a stick with glasses.” “Oh you guys just crack me up.”
“Why does she get to walk next to Miss Kanazuki?”
“How dare she walk so closer to her? Who does she think she is?” “Wait, isn’t that Suzuki Sayoko?” “What, you mean that gloomy and ugly looking ghost?” “Shhh! Keep it down, she’ll hear you!”
I started to falter in my steps as Mari continued to walk with her head up toward the lockers. I tried to catch up but I couldn’t. Just when I was falling further and further behind…
Mari’s hand reached back and grabbed mine.
All of sudden, there was dead silence around us.
The stares of disbelief was pure gold.
She maintained her pace and tightened her grip. She never looked back but I understood. Biting my lower lip and choking back my tears of thanks, I followed her into the locker room. We had gym for our first period that day.
* * *
I just stood there watching myself fail. There was nothing I could do. After all, I was never well versed in dealing with people and relationships. This wasn’t like that show where the raven-haired heroine had some guy who just happens to catch her best side on her best day. Then, all of the sudden, she gained courage, explained herself to a couple of tough girls, and they became best friends. Nope, this was real life.
I supposed there was a god. After all, the religious people met in that little room after school seemed to believe in a god. It’s funny though, because if this god was a “he”, then he never cared for girls like me much. We were also supposed to be his “daughters”.
I couldn’t remember the last time that I wasn’t shunned by most people.
Who was it that told me that I was worthy anyway? It sure wasn’t a “god”.
I couldn’t remember the number of times I slid my wrist in my dream. It’s just that I couldn’t gather the courage to do it in real life. After all,
I had always been too cowardly to exist either way, life or death.
* * *
I always found an excuse not to participate in gym activities. The only sport that I was interested in was volleyball. I did well in that, despite the fact that my own teammates often shoved me whenever I tried to set up a volley for someone else, or simply watched as I attempted a save. I guess after I got used to it, I knew how to perform and miraculously, I could still help my team. But I was never part of it and no one ever came to congratulate my efforts.
Today was basketball. I wish I could say that I was interested. Even Mari’s wonderful physique couldn’t ignite my interest.
I haven’t seen Keiko around. Mari sent her home sometime between last night and this morning but it seemed like Keiko decided to be absent for the entire day. Keita was playing ball with the boys’ group on the other side of the court.
I wondered about Ryoko, whom I haven’t seen since our encounter this morning. I closed my eyes - her smell, her whisper, her breath, her breasts and…
The fire that began in my heart was slowly stroking my thighs, and my sex between them. I had to relief myself.
I just had to. Slowly, I got up and headed toward girl’s bathroom.