Story: Strike A Chord, Sing Revolution... (all chapters)

Authors: Jessica Knight

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Chapter 1

Title: Part 1: Softly Spoken, The Play Begins...

Part 1 "Softly Spoken, The Play Begins..."

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"Sing softly the songs of revolution, that our voices may be heard throughout the heavens and the Earth." Shiori Takatsuki spoke to her, surrounded by a glowing light and the scent of roses. Shiori's hand was outstretched to her, beckoning her forwards.

Spellbound, Juri moved towards her and reached out to take the hand offered her. Somewhere inside, she knew what would happen next, but still she went forward and found the hand withdrawn with a smile as Shiori turned her back and walked away.

Juri wanted to follow, but found that she was too afraid to. So she stood there and watched Shiori walk away. "I would sing for you." She said softly to the girl who had left her. Her body felt heavy and she wanted to sleep. The ground would be fine enough, she considered.

"Oh Miss Juri, oh mistress yes..." She heard a soft and passion filled voice moan. Juri jerked back to wakefulness and turned to see a soft bed in a familiar room. Her room. Her bed. Her... Her bride. And herself laying there with Anthy's naked and beautiful body stretched over her own, the girl's thighs straddling and riding her double's thigh, seemingly in ecstasy.

Juri swallowed hard seeing this. "This is a losing battle." She spoke out loud, not knowing to whom she was speaking.

Her double's face turned to the side, clearly flushed with passion. "Is this really what you want?" She spoke.

As she listened, Anthy breathed out her release and fell down over her double's body and started to kiss her neck. "I wish someone would sing for me." Anthy whispered sadly in her double's ear, the words somehow sounding in Juri's own ears as if it really were her on the bed beneath the other girl's body.

Juri suddenly felt so tired again. So tired, she felt herself fainting. She longed to rest. If not with someone whom she loved, then by herself. Just for a little while. The sound of some buzzing thing tried to tell her something as she fell to the ground. Was it important?

"Miss Juri?" A soft voice spoke to her. "Miss Juri, it's time to wake up. We have classes before too long, and I've made breakfast for us."

Juri opened her eyes blearily and her gaze focused on the red lit up numbers on her alarm clock. [So that's what the buzzing was.] Her sleepy mind pieced together. She turned her head over and looked at the girl standing over her bed. She suddenly found herself unreasonably annoyed with that girl for some reason. "I'll be there in a minute. Go entertain Chu Chu or something. I know you love to do that." She spoke grumpily, turning over in bed and burying her head in the pillow.

Anthy's lilting laugh was the reply. "I'll be waiting for you, Miss Juri." Anthy said as she left the room.

Juri groaned to herself and turned over, staring at the ceiling. "Engaged to be married yet. All because I beat Touga Kiryuu in a duel under an impossible upside-down castle. Sometimes I truly think life is simply too bizarre for words."

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Still drowsy from sleep, her mind obsessing over the dream she'd had, Juri Arisugawa slipped on her Ohtori Academy Student Council uniform jacket and shook out her hair. She considered herself in the mirror for a moment. Wondering obtusely who it was exactly that was looking back at her.

Shaking her head of the ridiculous thoughts, yet still not quite able to banish the mental image of Anthy Himemiya's naked body poised over her own in bed. It shivered through her again and she hated it. That girl was so maddening to just be around, she once again found herself utterly indecisive about her own feelings and what her life had become. She found her hand unconsciously moving up to clasp her locket again. She closed her eyes and thought of Shiori... There had been a time when she thought Shiori was her entire world, all she needed to be happy and at peace. ["Sing softly the songs of revolution..."] Her mind repeated the words. Revolution. What did it all even mean anyway? What did it all even matter?

She sighed in annoyance and tucked the locket inside the folds of her jacket and buttoned it up, heading out into the other room to meet her bride. At the door, her eyes lingered on her bed, another involuntary shiver going through her.

As she walked into the room, the scent of waffles and seasoned tofu and vegetable soup met her nose and she realized: yes, she was hungry. The soup was left over from their meal last evening and Juri had to admit she was looking forward to eating more of it. "It smells... really nice." She said sincerely to Anthy, offering her a small reluctant smile for her efforts. Especially pleased by the strawberries and cream she saw were accompanying the waffles.

"Why thank you, Miss Juri." Anthy spoke, smiling serenely over at her. "Shall we sit down to eat?" She asked.

Juri momentarily closed her eyes and sighed softly. "We can do that." She spoke, going over and taking her seat. Watching with a vague sort of curiosity as Anthy took the seat next to her at the small circular table.

"Would you like some tea, Miss Juri?" Anthy asked.

"Yes, I would." Juri answered. Her elbows on the table, she folded her hands under her chin and watched with something like fascination as Anthy poured her a cup of tea. She had to admit, no matter what else was true, it was also true that it was... nice... to be able to share her mornings with someone.

"Did you sleep well?" Juri asked in a casual sort of voice, not really sure why she'd asked.

Anthy looked at her for a moment, meeting her eyes with that sort of calm way she had about her. "I slept very well. Thank you, Miss Juri... And you?" Anthy asked. Uncharacteristically leaning her head against the palm of one of her hands, braced by an elbow on the table.

Juri blinked, caught off guard by this unexpected and deceptively innocent turn about. "I uh... No. No, I didn't." She admitted.

"I see." Anthy said. "I'm sorry to hear that, Miss Juri... Please know, that if there is ever anything I can do to make your nights more pleasant, you have just to ask me."

Juri's eyes narrowed at the other girl. "Just what are you saying?" She asked coldly.

"...Only that I wish for you to be able to sleep peacefully." She told her. "I belong to you, Miss Juri. You have just to speak it, and I will do as you ask, happily."

Juri just stared at her, caught between outrage and confusion. "Just eat your soup and let me be." She seethed at her, turning away and picking up her fork.

"As you wish, Miss Juri." Anthy spoke quietly, picking up her spoon and partaking of the soup before her.

Juri raised her head slowly and looked at what Anthy was doing. "God! Stop that! It wasn't a command, damn you!" She fumed, getting up from the table and pacing around the room.

"Have I done something to upset you, Miss Juri?" Anthy asked, seemingly anxious over her betrothed's behavior.

"Oh, you'd like me to answer that, wouldn't you?" Juri shot at her, her nerves worn ragged. "Don't think I don't see what you're doing. I see it." Juri got up into her face, looming over her a breath's distance away. "If I gave you a command to tell me the truth, would you do it? No matter what I asked?" She dared her.

"Of course, Miss Juri. You know I would do anything you say." Anthy said.

Juri closed her eyes, defeated. "That's what I thought." She said, not willing to actually force even that on the other girl. "Do you like it?" She found herself asking. "When I'm this close to you? Do you like how it feels?" She asked, reaching a hand up and gently touching a few locks of Anthy's hair.

Anthy closed her eyes. "Very much." She said softly.

Juri lingered there just a moment, then backed away. "I wish I could believe you meant that." Was all she said, leaving and going back to her room, her food forgotten.

Anthy didn't say anything as she left.

Juri sat on the edge of her bed, her head in her hands. [This is so unfair.] She thought to herself, not believing just how much she had wanted to just go a little further and know what it was like to really know the touch of the girl in the other room. To feel her lips on hers, see her eyes as her double in her dreams must have seen them as they made love together.

It was so maddening how much that quiet, unassuming girl out there had gotten under her skin in the time they'd been living together. She wasn't surprised by it anymore. The little things Anthy said to her to drive her to distraction. The small ways her words brushed against her defenses and gently shook them. In a bizarre way, she'd almost come to enjoy it. Like a dance... or a duel. A few times, she'd actually half way convinced herself that maybe Anthy really did love her and all of this was just her way of... of letting her know how she felt.

With Anthy, you could never tell for sure though. And that's why. That's why she would never touch her like that. Not if she were the last girl on Earth.

"Miss Juri?" The soft, familiar voice spoke to her. Juri looked up and saw Anthy at the door. "The food will get cold... Are you sure you won't have some more before we go to classes?" She asked.

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"Ah, good morning, Utena my love." Wakaba Shinohara cheerily greeted her best friend, Utena Tenjou, as she rounded the corner and came into view.

"Wakaba! Good morning!" Utena laughed as the girl launched herself at her and hugged her fiercely. "In good spirits today I see?"

"Of course I am, silly. With a cute boyfriend like you to make me happy, what more could a girl ask for?" She teased.

"Well I don't know about you, but I need some food!" Utena replied. "Come on, I want to get to the cafeteria before the lines get too huge." She told her.

Wakaba giggled and grabbed hold of Utena's hand and pulled her along. "Well come on silly, we need to get a move on then!"

"Coming, I'm coming." Utena smiled in indulgence and let herself be pulled along, hurrying to keep pace with her friend who had entirely too much energy for this time in the morning in the pink haired girl's humble opinion.

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"So, what do you think of the new teacher in history class?" Wakaba asked as she sat across from Utena at one of the cafeteria tables.

"She seems alright, I guess." Utena said thoughtfully as she took a bite of her food. "I kind of like her accent." She admitted, crinkling her nose a little.

"Yeah. Where do you think she's from anyway. One of those European countries?" Wakaba asked.

"I think she said... It was Italy?" Utena tried to recall more clearly.

"Really?" Wakaba questioned. "I guess I didn't catch that part when she introduced herself to us..." She pondered.

"Yeah. I remembered it, because it was a city that had a name I'd heard some place before."

"Huh." Wakaba considered the news. "Do you remember what city it was?"

"No... I don't know." Utena admitted, a little sheepishly. "But so, how are you doing on our assignment, Wakaba?"

Making a somewhat over-stated show of aggrievement, Wakaba answered. "Horrible." She admitted. "I mean what kind of assignment is that anyway? Describe an historical event as if I was there? I don't know how to do that!"

Utena laughed. "Yeah. I'm not doing all that well with it myself." She admitted.

"You're not?" Wakaba looked at her. "Well that's no good." She complained. "I was going to ask you to help me with mine."

"Gee, I'd never of guessed." Utena gazed across the table at her, her chin resting on the palm of one of her hands, propped up by an elbow on the table.

Wakaba just looked at her, clearly annoyed. "Well, what do you expect me to do? You always help me with these things, Utena." She pointed out. "I'm so disappointed."

Utena laughed again, Wakaba never failing to cheer her up, even when she was complaining about her. "Aw, come on, it's not that bad, is it?" She ventured.

"Hhmph. If you were a proper boyfriend, you'd help me, Utena." She complained.

Utena just looked at her. "I never said I wouldn't help you, Wakaba. Did I?" She pointed out, continuing the tease. "How about we just work on it together? We can help each other." She offered.

Wakaba smiled. "That's what I like to hear!" She said cheerfully. "Well, now that that's taken care of, I can enjoy my breakfast for real finally."

"Well I'm glad I could help." Utena laughed, nibbling at her food, her gaze absently watching her friend across the table. It gave her a sense of peace somehow.

"Good morning, Miss Utena." A voice interrupted her.

"Good morning, Utena. Hi Wakaba." A second more cheery voice chimed in.

"Oh, Hi Kaori, Chiaki. How are you two this morning?" Utena smiled up at the girls who had stopped by. Kaori Tanaka and Chiaki Minoru were her and Wakaba's best friends lately. They'd met the two of them over break and discovered they all got along really well with one another.

"I'm doing very well, thank you." Kaori replied.

"Same here." Chiaki echoed. "Can we sit with you two?" She asked.

"Of course you can. You always sit with us." Utena pointed out with an amused smile.

"Oh, just sit down already." Wakaba admonished them. "It's not like you were interrupting anything." She teased.

"You never know. The way you two talk." Chiaki pointed out logically.

"It's true." Kaori agreed. "Lots of people think you might really be a couple."

"Do they really?" Utena asked, once again supporting her chin with the palm of her hand and using the other one to pick at her trail mix.

"Totally." Chiaki confirmed. "Of course, we know it's all just talk, don't we Kaori?"

"I know no such thing, Chiaki." The other girl disagreed airily. "For all we know, it's all an act, put on for our benefit."

"Guys, come on." Wakaba whined.

"Who's that?" Utena asked, her gaze having caught something out of the ordinary.

Wakaba and the others turned and saw what had caught Utena's attention. Two girls, one in a student council uniform and the other in a normal girl's uniform. They seemed to be having some sort of argument. Or the girl from the student council was anyway. The other girl didn't seem to be raising her voice at all.

"That's Juri Arisugawa. The other girl's Anthy Himemiya." Kaori answered, watching the scene with interest.

"Looks like a lover's quarrel to me." Chiaki observed. "Some girls get all the luck." She complained.

"Huh? What do you mean?" Wakaba asked.

"You mean you don't know?" Kaori asked.

"Don't know what?" Utena asked, taking her eyes away from Juri and Anthy as their argument seemed to stop and they left to go on their way to wherever it was they had been going.

"About Miss Arisugawa." Kaori answered.

Chiaki nodded her agreement. "It's a tragic tale of unrequited love." She informed them.

"Really?" Wakaba's interest was piqued. "That sounds mysterious."

"Tell us about it, Chiaki?" Utena asked, finding she was interested.

"Well, you know about her don't you? Juri Arisugawa. She's totally famous. The captain of the fencing team from a young age. I heard she won a championship last year." Chiaki informed them.

"That is impressive." Wakaba allowed.

"Darn right it is." Chiaki replied. "When she fights, it's like she's a dancer or something. Nobody can touch her! She almost never loses." She praised. "Anyway, at her old school, no one knows the specifics, but... They say she got her heart broken really badly."

"What happened?" Wakaba asked, totally having been drawn into the drama.

"Well, nobody knows for sure. Some say it was over a boy..." Chiaki drew out the telling of her story a little. "But I heard it was really another girl, and that she keeps her picture in a locket under her uniform and looks at it whenever she's alone and she thinks no one can see her."

"What we can't figure out is how she ended up with Anthy Himemiya." Kaori put forward.

"I know, right?" Chiaki agreed. "I mean, all they ever seem to do is not get along. You wouldn't think a girl like that would be her type."

"Some girls like things like that." Kaori offered.

"Well I don't buy it." Chiaki defended her point of view. "I still think there's something weird going on between them. I mean, haven't you looked at them? They don't act like they're together."

"That is true." Kaori allowed.

"Maybe they're just friends?" Wakaba put forward.

"Maybe..." Chiaki allowed.

"They are roommates after all." Kaori pointed out.

"You two really seem to know a lot about this." Utena laughed, amused by her new friends' depth of knowledge and opinion on the subject.

"Well of course we do." Chiaki defended. "I mean, come on Utena. Did you look at her? She's like a goddess or something! Who wouldn't be interested?" She questioned.

"She'd totally dump me if Juri smiled at her." Kaori accused. "Don't even deny it."

"I would not." Chiaki defended. "And besides, you're the one who..."

"Do not go there, Chia." Kaori warned. "I said I was sorry for that."

"What's she talking about?" Wakaba asked.

"It was... Okay, so I kind of cheated on her two weeks ago. It just sort of happened... and it was just a little kiss. It totally didn't mean that much."

"What happened?" Utena asked.

"Kaori had this blonde girl for a lab partner. Kana something. She is such a slut." Chiaki explained. "They stayed late at school one night and Kaori still won't tell me the whole story, but..."

"It's so embarrassing." Kaori put in.

"Kana doesn't even like girls." Chiaki explained. "Kaori swears she made the first move though and that she was just so shocked by it she let it happen."

"It's the truth!" Kaori insisted.

"Yeah, whatever."

"How did you find out about it?" Wakaba asked.

"Kaori told me about it after." Chiaki proudly spoke.

"Of course she did." Utena spoke up.

"Yeah." Chiaki sighed just a hint. "She was so guilty over it, it was really kind of pathetic."

"Hey!" Kaori protested.

"Okay, so you were kind of cute too." Chiaki allowed.

"Well that's better than nothing, I guess." Kaori still looked rather put off.

"Hey, come on. You know I love you." Chiaki consoled her.

That made Kaori smile. "Yeah, I know."

"You two are so cute together." Utena praised them, smiling.

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To be continued...

Chapter 2

Title: Part 2: First Meeting, To Be Remembered...

Part 2 "First Meeting, To Be Remembered..."

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Juri Arisugawa was alone in the elevator. She was leaning against the side as it moved, her hands clasped behind her back and her eyes closed. This would be trouble, she was sure of it. How long would it be before he challenged her? She had decided to simply leave before exacerbating the situation any further. Thank goodness for Miki, that was all she could say. Touga had been his usual scheming, flattering self - and, just like with any scorpion, you always had to be careful not to get stung. And as for Kyouichi? Well he had just been a blustering squall of male adolescent hormones and preening self-aggrandizement if she'd ever seen one... At times, lets just say, she really, really, really wished Touga Kiryuu would do everyone else a favor and just put out for the boy and put him out of his misery. Not that she couldn't understand why he didn't. Oh Kyouichi was fair to look at for a boy, she was reasonably sure, but, and sexual orientations aside, Kyouichi's personality and his constant whining and moaning would have to make bedding him a chore for just about anyone with less than the patience of a saint! And if Touga were ever to be accused of sainthood, it would have to be by someone exceedingly gullible. So yes, Miki was her saving grace, blessed be his sweet smile, boy prodigy, piano playing heart. If it were just her, Touga Kiryuu, and Kyouichi Saionji in the council... She shivered. [I don't even want to think about it.] She concluded.

The elevator chimed and the doors opened and she stepped out.

"Anthy?" She asked, catching sight of the other girl waiting there on a bench for her. "You're still here? I thought you were going to get some lunch?"

Anthy looked up at her and smiled. She nodded her head slightly once as to agree. "But that's what I did, Miss Juri." She replied, picking up the container of food that had been by her side and getting up to present it to her betrothed. "I brought steamed rice, curry, and shrimp salad... I thought, perhaps you'd like to share?"

She regarded the Rose Bride for a moment. Juri was very tired after the stressful council meeting, and the morning's tension between the two of them was still making her feel raw and uncomfortably exposed to the other girl. She really felt she needed some time to herself to think and... just to let herself feel what she was feeling for a while. Add to that the fact that her temper and restraint had been sorely tested up there with the council... No, she concluded, she really wasn't in a fit state for company at the moment. At least not where Anthy Himemiya was concerned...

Juri sighed and closed her eyes. "I'm sorry, Anthy. Perhaps some other time." She said, and turned to go. Anthy gave no reply and Juri found herself pausing in her steps, considering better of herself for being so brisk to the other girl. "Look, I really am sorry. I'm sure the lunch you made is very good. And it was very thoughtful of you to bring it to me like this... I just... I need to be alone for a little while. Is that alright?"

Anthy nodded. "Of course, Miss Juri. Think nothing of it."

Juri felt like she should say something to that, but for the life of her she couldn't decide what. "Yes. I'll... I'll just see you later then." She spoke rather stiffly. It was a little frustrating, the feeling that certain kind of inability to know what to say evoked in her. And slightly worrisome too, that Anthy could evoke that same exact feeling in her with such startling regularity.

"Until then, Miss Juri." Anthy smiled at her.

Juri spared her another glance, and then nodded and turned and walked away.

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"That's exactly right." Miss Zoe Oyama, Utena's teacher in Speech class, praised. "So, I can count on you then, Miss Tenjou?"

"Alright then." Utena agreed. "I'll do my best."

"And you, Mister Yanowa? I assume we can count on you as well?" Miss Oyama asked hopefully.

"Sure. I don't see why not. The extra credit will be good to have anyway." The student replied

"That's the kind of spirit I like to see from my students." The teacher replied, wishing Jin Yanowa's motivations were a little less selfishly motivated, like Utena Tenjou's seemed to be, but at least she gave him points for being forthright. It was her considered opinion that it was a good trait to have for an orator or a debater. The ability to speak clearly and honestly could take you far. "So, I guess we'll see you tomorrow then. Thank you both again for agreeing."

"No problem." Jin replied, bowing slightly and turning to leave.

"Yeah, I'm sure it'll be fun. I'll see you then, Miss Oyama." Utena bowed as well and offered a smile and a wave as she took her study case and followed her fellow student out of the room, turning the opposite direction. She and Jin Yanowa had been chosen to read their essays out loud in front of the class the next day, as they had both, it seemed, impressed the teacher the most. Speech was a fun class, and all you had to do was talk and write a few essays mostly - a fact which Utena was grateful for as her other classes, excepting gym, were pretty study and work intensive. She smiled to think of the paper in history class that was due in a week though. She always loved studying more when Wakaba was there to cheer her up and help her. Even though, empirically speaking, Wakaba probably wasn't the most helpful sort of study partner you could have. The girl wasn't a genius or anything, and she had a little trouble concentrating sometimes - still, she wouldn't trade her for a brain case like Jin Yanowa for anything!

Utena giggled a little to herself as she walked along the path, thinking of what it would be like if Jin was her study partner instead. She visualized herself getting this blank and far away look on her face as he prattled on about something annoying, then - just as she would be feeling like she could surely take no more and would have to scream and pull her hair out or go mad - then Wakaba would burst in, whack him over the head with her book bag and save her! The image caused her small giggle fit to be more severe.

She looked up at the sky, breathed in, closed her eyes a moment, and exhaled. "Wakaba, you are my hero for sure." She said softly with a smile touching her lips. [Not that I'm going to tell you that.] She considered a caveat. [Your head's big enough already.] She thought it with affection.

A motion caught her attention out of the corner of her eye and she looked over. A few students were heading her way, chatting with one another. Utena shook her head of her silly thoughts and headed off in the direction of the lunch hall across the campus (it was kind of a long walk). Thoughts of the cafeteria though, brought thoughts of that particular scene at breakfast to mind again. Thoughts of the girl in the student council uniform actually - Juri. She felt a bit self conscious about it really, but she'd been thinking about her and Anthy Himemiya off and on all morning. It wasn't exactly the first time she'd wondered about herself honestly, if she were really like Chiaki or Kaori. It was kind of hard to tell before, actually. She thought boys were attractive, in a way, and girls were in a different way. She'd never minded Wakaba talking to her like she did, calling her her boyfriend. She actually kind of liked it truthfully. Not that she wanted to be a boy or anything, she so didn't, despite what a few boys at the school might claim after she beat them at basketball or something. It was just nice, you know? But the thing was, she'd never really had what she'd call a serious crush on someone. She was pretty sure though, that how she was feeling about this girl she'd only even seen across a crowded room would qualify as a crush. A real one. When she thought about her, her chest felt lighter and heavier at the same time in this really funny sort of way, and she had trouble paying attention to things. She found herself trying to remember little details about her. And the thought that she might already be taken was not really that pleasant to think about. She had it bad, she ruefully admitted to herself as she walked.

So absorbed was she in her thoughts though, that she didn't see the signs as she came to the corner of a building and found herself running into another student before she noticed they had appeared from around the corner.

Startled and caught off guard, Utena felt herself losing balance. A flash of orange hair and a hand grabbing hers and steadying her and she found herself looking into startlingly vivid aquamarine eyes.

"Are you alright?" Juri asked.

"Oh, um, yeah." Utena said, getting her balance back fully. "Sorry about that."

"It's alight. I was distracted too... I should apologize to you too." Juri said, looking at the other girl with some curiosity. Utena Tenjou didn't exactly blend in after all. Long pink hair and a customized boy's uniform? Juri mentally found herself helplessly smiling at the cute combination it made.

"Lets just say, it was bad timing then..." Utena said, just a little self-consciously. "You're Juri Arisugawa, right?" She asked, not really a question. "What a coincidence, I was just thinking of you."

"You were thinking... of me?" Juri asked.

"Oh, well yeah. I guess that does sound a little strange, doesn't it?" Utena admitted, backing up just a bit so she wasn't quite so much in the other girl's personal space. Juri let go of her hand as she did. "It was just that I saw you and your friend, Anthy? Arguing at breakfast time this morning. My friends were kind of gossiping, you see."

"Is that so?" The student council member asked, her manner easy if a little guarded. Juri knew that by rights she should be annoyed about the gossip thing. Somehow though, she realized she wasn't.

"Yeah, sorry about that." She paused. "I'm Utena. Utena Tenjou. I'm glad to meet you."

Juri was silent for just a moment. "That's a nice name." She said. "You were... just heading off to lunch I take it?"

"Yeah. I had to stay after class a little while, so I'm a little behind." Utena explained.

"Why did they keep you?" Juri found herself, a little awkwardly, actually striking up a conversation with this girl. It felt kind of odd the way she found herself acting, but she didn't really feel the need to question it.

"Oh, um, Miss Oyama wanted me and another student to read our essays for the class tomorrow. That's all."

"Impressive." Juri smiled kind of charmingly. "What... What was your essay about?" She asked, for some reason wanting to know something more about the girl in front of her.

"Oh, um, Tiananmen Square, actually." Utena confided.

"Really?" Juri smiled. "That's an ambitious topic..." She praised, finding she liked talking with this other girl, just liked the sound of her voice in fact. "A failed revolution. It's kind of ironic in fact." She said wistfully.

[Ironic?] Utena thought. "Actually, that's the interesting thing. The Chinese government is the only one saying it was an attempted revolutionary movement. Apparently, from what I can tell, the protesters were just trying to get the government to change the way they do some things. They weren't trying to overthrow them." Utena explained.

"Really?" Her interest piqued even more. "...I didn't know that, actually." Juri said.

"A lot of people don't." Utena said, studying the other girl's face.

"So, what were these friends of yours saying about me?" Juri asked. "I'm actually kind of curious about it to tell you the truth."

Utena felt her cheeks warming just a little. "Well... My friends, Chiaki and Kaori, they apparently know a lot about you for some reason. There was... They were trying to decide whether you and Anthy Himemiya were having a lover's quarrel, or if you were just roommates."

"What did you decide?" Juri asked.

"The results of the inquiry were inconclusive." Utena told her, a little teasingly.

"Is that so?" Juri laughed. "Then you were probably more accurate than you realized." She admitted, not knowing at all why she was being so completely honest and forthcoming about something she hadn't ever talked about with anyone else.

"So you..."

"It's kind of a... It's complicated." Juri said. "I don't really know how I... How I feel about her."

"How does she feel about you?" Utena asked, her voice soft and caring.

Juri smiled. "I have no idea at all." She admitted with simple honesty, actually feeling the need to blink a little as she felt just the start of the start of unshed tears on the horizon.

"...That's gotta be pretty tough." Utena said, sympathetically. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. It's just how it is." Juri said simply. "What about you?" Juri asked.

"What about me?" Utena asked.

"Do you have a... Are you seeing anyone?" She asked.

Utena shook her head. "Not really..." She said. "I mean, my friend, Wakaba, she calls me her boyfriend sometimes... but it's really just a joke between us. I don't think she even likes girls that way." Utena confided. She felt the need to be honest about herself too, since Juri had been so much so about herself.

"Do you? Like girls that way?" Juri asked, her gaze soft yet intent and meaningful.

"I... Yeah. Yeah, I really think I do." Utena admitted.

Juri closed her eyes a moment, then opened them. "I thought so." She said simply.

"...You could tell?" Utena asked wonderingly.

Juri nodded, a small smile on her lips. "It's the way you talk. I like it."

Utena laughed a little nervously. "I like the way you talk too." She admitted rather lamely.

Juri gave her a sort of lost and enigmatic sort of smile. "Well, I probably shouldn't keep you any longer, should I? The lunch period's only going to last so much longer after all. I wouldn't want you to go hungry, would I?"

"Oh, right." Utena said, still a little unsteady around the other girl. [Talk about catching me off balance.] Utena said to herself.

"It was nice... running into you, Utena." Juri said.

"You too... Juri." Utena replied, feeling like there was really a moment being shared between them. Juri had called her by just her first name. It was a very familiar form of address, and it made her heart beat faster to think that the other girl considered it apt to address her like that.

Juri smiled, bringing her hand up as if to touch the other girl's face, yet stopping herself before she did. "I like that." She admitted wistfully, moving aside as starting on her way.

"So, I'll maybe see you around sometime, okay?" Utena turned to call to her.

Juri paused. "I'd... I think I'd like that." She said, and turned her head to look back at the other girl for just a moment before going on her way.

Utena stood there a moment, looking after the other girl as she walked away. She brought her right hand up to hold against her heart. She felt it beating fast in her chest, her body felt so different to her now. She didn't know how to explain it, except that she found herself wishing those blue-green eyes would look at her again. Wishing she could just walk beside her for a while. Even if it meant she had to skip lunch all together to do it.

She took a step forwards as if to follow after her and ask Juri if she could do that, but, reluctantly, she thought better of that. Somehow, she just knew she shouldn't push. And really, she didn't know exactly what she would do anyway. She or Juri. Juri was still sort of involved with someone else, wasn't she? It was just her luck though, wasn't it? That she finally found someone she really liked, and they weren't available... Still, Juri had said, she and that other girl weren't really together, were they? No, she'd said it was 'complicated'. And complicated, to her, meant there was room for hope.

Utena turned finally and walked towards the lunch hall again. [I'll just have to keep trying.] She told herself. Determined that she would at least try at it and see what happened. Considering it, she at least wanted to be her friend. [That's what I'll do. I'll try to be her friend.] Utena thought to herself, feeling better about it now. That was the thing to do after all, wasn't it? She realized, more than just the initial pull she'd felt towards the girl she'd glimpsed from afar, she now really just wanted to get to know her too. Wanted to be able to talk with her more, spend time. A lot of time, she lamented to herself. [This is going to be hard, I somehow know it is.]

Still, her feet picked up their pace and she felt a smile cross her face as she hurried along to meet her friends for lunch while she still had time to eat and chat a little perhaps. She wanted to tell someone about this, she realized. She didn't want to keep her feelings inside.

===================================================

[Why did I tell her those things?] Juri mentally questioned herself as she walked along the covered path along the side of the school building. [I don't even know her, for goodness sake.] She just couldn't fathom it. But something about Utena Tenjou had just been so disarming to her. It had been so effortless just to talk with her.... She hadn't wanted to stop. And that was kind of scary. She'd wanted to touch her too, in fact. Just some small touch, and it would have been fine.

She stopped, facing the open field of grass in front of her. She placed her hand on the pillar beside her and looked out at the tree before her in the distance. She sighed and her gaze dropped to the grass just before her feet. [It feels like... It feels a little like it did, with Shiori...] She admitted to herself, letting her hand drop from the pillar as she looked forward at the tree and almost unconsciously told her feet to move, told her legs to carry her forward. Her mind was blank and her vision cast downward as she went.

The familiar shade of the tree fell over her and she lowered herself down to the familiar spot. She sat there, arms folded over her knees, back resting against the trunk of the tree. She looked up into the slowly swaying branches and wondered.

...They'd just talked, and not really very well. Juri almost laughed at herself for how the whole little conversation had gone. It was ridiculous really. But she couldn't deny, her heart was beating faster when there'd been no other reason for it to be. Her skin had felt noticeably tingly and sensitized over her hand when she had thought briefly to just touch the other girl's face. When Utena spoke... Juri felt like she could remember every word.

[Is this what it felt like, to fall in love with someone?] She wondered to herself, not having an answer.

A fear clutched her heart at that thought. She moved her hand over the spot where her locket lay beneath her jacked and thought of Shiori Takatsuki, the girl who so often haunted her dreams and her days. Did she still love that girl? She didn't know... She knew her heart still ached to think of her. She could still feel acutely the desire to hold and be held by her - It had never left her.

She sat there a while, her eyes closed, just feeling that feeling. Honestly.

She didn't know what to do with the feeling any more than she usually did, but she couldn't help but need to let herself feel that sometimes. Times like this, when she felt lost or confused, when she so completely didn't know what to do next.

Her feelings were so confused.

Some part of her couldn't help but blame Anthy for that. Always for that. That girl, it had just gotten worse and worse with her... To the point now, that Juri somehow felt that all Anthy would have to do would be to catch her at the right moment and look at her the right way and she would surely come thoroughly undone.

A part of her was frightened, just to think of it. And a part deep inside, that part whispered to her that she wanted it to happen. Wanted that girl to find that one point inside her that would make all of her just come troubling down. It was kind of a fatalistic wish, she realized. But she knew she had it inside her.

She opened her eyes again, and looked out at the world.

'Sing softly the songs of revolution, that our voices may be heard throughout the heavens and the Earth.' The words that Shiori had spoken to her in her dreams echoed again in her mind, she hadn't been able to forget them.

Is that what a revolution was? Letting something crash down around you... and then, what you came out with, it would be something new and different. And... You'd just have to hope, whatever it was that resulted, it would be better than what had come before.

She thought of the upside-down floating castle. The sword Anthy carried within her as if by magic. 'Mysteries, all.' Anthy had called them.

[No more a mystery than you.] Juri spoke in her mind's voice. She wondered briefly, if she herself were a mystery to anyone. If Anthy tried to figure her out just as much as she tried to figure out Anthy, like she tried to figure out so many things about the world and her place in it. Maybe when it came down to it though, Anthy was just a lot better at it than her.

You never really knew. For some reason, Juri thought though, she was glad that Anthy was Anthy and she was who she was.

She sighed and took out the small stash of granola and dried fruit she'd retrieved from her locker shortly after she'd left the council chambers and Anthy behind. She took a bite, closing her eyes in appreciation of the little bit of food.

[Maybe I'm just thinking about things too much.] She considered.

===================================================

To be continued...

[End notes: And that's the end of chapter 2. There's lots more in store, and this might end up turning into a pretty long story in the end, but what do you think so far?]

Chapter 3

Title: Part 3: This Is My Confession, The Real Me...

Part 3 "This Is My Confession, The Real Me..."

===================================================

"Hi, Anthy." Nanami Kiryuu greeted Anthy Himemiya with a friendly smile as Anthy rounded the corner walking away from the entrance to the Student Council headquarters.

"Oh! Nanami, it's you. I didn't see you there." Anthy said in mild surprise as the girl stepped from the shadows to stand in front of her.

"Oh, I'm sorry Anthy, I didn't mean to startle you. I've been waiting here..." She said in a tone that was friendly, concerned, and a little uncertain.

"It's alright." Anthy smiled to her friend, taking a step closer to her. "Why are you waiting?"

"It's..." She turned her face away for a moment then looked back at Anthy again. "That heartless girl. She ditched you again, didn't she?" Nanami regarded her. "I'm sorry that happened..." She said it sincerely. "Well, you'll just have to share your picnic with me instead, won't you?" Nanami moved forward and captured Anthy's hand. "Want to?"

"Oh. Alright..." Anthy's mood brightened noticeably. "If it's not too much trouble for you, I mean." She qualified.

"Don't be silly." Nanami brushed it off. "Besides, except my brother, it's not like I have anyone else to have lunch with at this school. And he's busy again. Come on, we'll have fun." She smiled hopefully.

"Alright... Chu Chu isn't with me today." Anthy said as the two walked down the hall together.

"Oh, um." Nanami tried to think of what to say. If she was honest, she didn't really like to be around the odd little animal Anthy kept as a pet. But... she wanted Anthy to like her, so she always tried to like Chu Chu. Or at least, coexist? "He'll just have to come along next time then." She tried valiantly to sound like she really meant it.

"I know you don't like him." Anthy said as they walked, looking down at the floor ahead of her.

"Well... I don't... dislike him?" Nanami was pensive. "And he's your friend, right? So that makes everything okay." She said positively.

Anthy smiled. "Do you think so?"

"Absolutely." Nanami reaffirmed decisively. "I'm sorry I get nervous around him though..." She trailed off.

"It's okay." Anthy said. "I'll make sure to protect you."

Nanami laughed, feeling kind of ridiculous about it.

"You're a good friend." She said half-jokingly.

The two ended up walking out to the grass outside the building, somewhere towards the middle of the small field populated by other groups of lunching students. There were school buildings to be seen in three directions, and, in the other, was the Forbidden Forest - a mysterious place that most of the students at the academy had never seen the inside of. Nanami and Anthy were among the small number who actually had.

"This is a good spot, don't you think?" Nanami asked, standing in a fairly vacant area of the field next to an island of pink and white rose bushes surrounded by a foot high styled wire-guard fence along with a small ring of tiny purple flowers (slightly raised). "Here, give me the blanket. I'll lay it out for us." She offered, taking the fabric sheet after Anthy, complying with the request, held it out for her.

"There, all done." Nanami sat down and looked over curiously at Anthy as the other girl started to set the food and things she'd brought out. The smells of delicious food wafted up to tempt her and she was doubly glad that Juri Arisugawa had ditched on this.

Thoughts of Juri though, brought a certain damper to Nanami's mood and her gaze wondered off to look at the Forbidden Forest, looming imposingly in view to the side. She remembered the day she'd gotten here, nineteen days ago. Her brother had taken her up to a balcony that overlooked an impossible sight. A platform suspended on a diagonal pillar or beam - stairs circled around it, leading to the precipice - a place where duels were fought, with real swords. She could hardly believe it hadn't toppled over long ago, the way it looked. But that, of course, hadn't been the most unbelievable thing. The upside-down floating castle, crowned with glowing lights in a sky somehow miraculously contained within the forest... Mysteries, Touga had said. And he had said a lot more besides, and that was why she was here, really. Why she was at this school. Why she'd first decided to make friends with Anthy Himemiya. Though not why she now really was Anthy's friend.

She found herself glancing down at the rose crest ring on her right hand and once again trying to wrap her head around it's significance. What did it all really mean?

"Aren't you going to eat, Nanami?" Anthy asked.

"Huh? Oh, Yes! Of course. Sorry about that, Anthy. I guess my thoughts... got away from me." She said, sparing a furtive glace at the forest again.

"You were thinking of the castle again." Anthy said.

"Partly... Anthy, what does it mean, exactly, that you're the Rose Bride?"

===================================================

"Utena's here!"

Utena smiled at Wakaba's enthusiastic greeting as she approached the table where her friends were sitting, and readily accepted the hug Wakaba offered her.

"Hi, you." Utena said playfully, smiling brightly when the hug ended.

"You're happy." Wakaba said, curiously.

"Yeah, I am. You saved food for me?" Utena noticed, having expected it but still being very grateful.

"Of course, you're my boyfriend, aren't you? What kind of a sucky girlfriend would I be if I let you starve to death?"

"Well, thank you very much. I'm a lucky boy alright." Utena laughed. "Come on, I'm starved." She went to sit down at the place her friends had saved for her. "Hi you two." Utena greeted Chiaki and Kaori.

"Hi!" Chiaki greeted.

"Hi Utena." Kaori greeted drowsily from her place resting on her girlfriend's shoulder.

"What happened to her?" Utena inquired, putting her elbows on the table and regarding Kaori with inquisitive interest.

"Gym class wore her down." Chiaki said playfully, taking hold of Kaori's head and giving her forehead a conciliatory kiss.

"They're all out to get me." Kaori said grumpily.

"Who?" Utena said.

"The healthy ones." Kaori said. "One of them even managed to seduce me..." She referred to Chiaki. "It's a conspiracy."

Chiaki laughed. "So much with the drama, she is."

"Mmmph, evil temptress." She accused with mock grumpiness.

"I like it when she's like this." Wakaba said. "She's so funny." She laughed.

"Ah, come on, it can't be that bad, can it?" Utena asked, leaning her head on one of her palms and taking a bite of her rice.

"You're one of them too, Utena. Don't think I don't know." Kaori narrowed her eyes and groggily moved off of Chiaki's shoulder, putting her elbows on the table and holding her head up by placing her palms on her cheeks.

"Was it really so awful?" Wakaba asked Chiaki.

"It was just track and field stuff." Chiaki said.

Kaori looked down at her food. "Is it wrong that my curry looks like a pillow to me?"

"Yes, lazy one, it's wrong. Come on, you need to eat more anyway. It's probably why you're feeling as bad as you are. I keep telling you..." Chiaki said worriedly.

Kaori groaned. "I don't even like Japanese food very much. That's the problem. I need salad... and Cherry Coke... and cheese pizza. Yummy, gooey cheese pizza." She said dreamily. "For breakfast, tomorrow morning." She groaned, resolutely supporting her face with one hand and taking a spoonful of curry with the other.

"Good girl." Chiaki praised. "If you eat it all, I'll order cheese pizza from town for you tonight."

"Really?" Kaori asked, the spark of life returning to her eyes.

"Evil temptress's honor." Chiaki pledged.

Kaori laughed that tired kind of laugh that always sounds unexpected and makes you smile and buried her head in Chiaki's shoulder again. "I'm acting goofy, aren't I?" She said, embarrassed.

"Yeah, but it's very cute." Chiaki said, taking Kaori's cheek in her palm and looking into her eyes. "It makes me want to kiss you now." She said seriously. And it really did, even though they both knew they couldn't actually do that in front of everyone like that with teachers possibly around who would probably frown on such things.

Utena sighed watching the two together, a wistful look on her face.

"What's that look for?" Wakaba asked, having just taken a bite of food.

"Hmm?" Utena looked at her. "Oh, yeah, I kind of... Um, well I figured out something for sure today I guess." She looked down at her plate, all the sudden worried about how her friends would take the news that she was for sure gay. Oh, she knew in theory they should be okay with it, Kaori and Chiaki were as out as trees after all, but... well, nobody acts terribly predictable when someone they know reveals they aren't who you thought they were. It always had a tendency to feel kind of like a betrayal for them, even if it really wasn't.

"Sounds heavy." Kaori said, still looking tired but noticeably perking up at her friend's serious tone. Plus, she had to admit, eating did help. Even if it wasn't the pizza she longed for.

"Yeah..." Utena's hand went to the back of her head, in a clearly understood nonverbal cue. "I, um, I ran into someone on the way here and..." Unsure how to go on, her hand dropped to join the other one in her lap.

"And?" Chiaki prompted.

Utena raised her head to meet the eyes of her friends. "And I'm sure about it now." She said.

"You're sure about it...?" Kaori asked, wondering if her brain was just slow from exhaustion and lack of proper cheese intake or if she legitimately didn't have all the information needed to reach a reliable conclusion as to what Utena Tenjou was referring to.

"I'm a lesbian. For sure." Utena said. "And I like someone." She hastened to add.

"Oh my god..." Chiaki said. "I totally knew it!" She turned to Kaori. "You knew it too, right?"

"Obvious." Kaori said. "Welcome to the fold, pink haired one. It's nice on this side of things." She smiled serenely (maybe a little too serenely in fact), looking over at Chiaki.

"Acting goofy again." Chiaki pointed out.

"I lack proper cheese intake, and my feet are still very sore." She whined piteously. She was also obviously making an effort to create a more low-stress environment through use of humor for Utena's sake as well, which didn't go unnoticed or unappreciated by her girlfriend.

Utena smiled, happy beyond words that this was going so well, only to have her feelings of relief derailed when she looked over to Wakaba to see her best friend looking down at her food with a decidedly not happy look on her face like her brain had just been given information it really didn't know what to do with. "Wakaba..."

"Who is she...?" Her friend asked softly.

"Wakaba..." Utena felt something tighten within her chest.

Wakaba turned and looked at her in the eyes, lending a sense of urgency to her question. "Who is she, Utena? Who did you meet when...?" her voice trailed off.

"Juri Arisugawa..." Utena said, keeping eye contact and trying to figure out what was going on behind Wakaba's eyes.

"...From the student council? Like, from this morning? Her?" Wakaba asked, the information seeming to snap her out of whatever mindset she'd been in, a confused look coming over her face replacing it. [But you just saw her for the first time this morning...]

"Um, yeah, that's her..." Utena said, feeling kind of helpless all the sudden and not sure of what to say next.

Something changed again for Wakaba, and she shook her head and laughed. "Well, that's great!" She said. "I'm, um, I'm happy for you." She turned and reached out for one of Utena's hands and took it in her own. "I really am. I'm glad for you Utena." She said sincerely. "...I guess this means I can't call you my boyfriend anymore though, huh?" She said.

"Huh?" Utena hadn't thought of that. "Oh, well, I... Of course you still can. If you want I mean... I mean, it's not like she's my girlfriend or anything... We just talked a little, that's all." She was quick to explain.

"You just talked? And you know? Like, for sure, you know you like her that much?" Wakaba asked.

"Well, yeah... I could just tell. I've.... No one's ever made me feel like that before. Not even..."

"So, out with it already!" Chiaki interrupted. "This evil temptress wants details, girl."

"Yes, what did she say Utena? How'd you meet?" Kaori asked, her tiredness and goofy mood seemingly now forgotten.

"Oh, well..." Utena looked uncertainly back and forth between Wakaba and Kaori and Chiaki across the table. Tentatively sure that Wakaba was now okay with her confession and all, she continued. "It was kind of a coincidence really... I was walking, and I was thinking about her." She looked from Chiaki to Kaori, seeing they were following along avidly. "I'd just been thinking about seeing her this morning, and we just sort of... ran into each other. And I was about to fall over, and she caught me. She looked down at me, and her eyes were so..." Utena rested her chin on the heels of her palms, fingers curled up over her chin, and she got the smile and a sort of far away look in her eyes.

"This is serious, isn't it." Kaori put in.

Chiaki nodded. "She's gone alright." She smiled, sparing a worried glance for Wakaba who still looked like she was struggling to deal with this.

"We just talked for a little bit." Utena said, sitting up straight again.

"What about her and Anthy Himemiya?" Wakaba asked. "So, they weren't together after all?"

Utena looked over at her friend. "...It's complicated." She said. "I shouldn't really be talking about what she said about... but, they're not together, and they haven't been together before either. So, it's not a lost cause or anything. I just figure, I'll try to be her friend and.... who knows? Girl's gotta try, right?" She asked.

"Totally correct." Kaori agreed.

"I agree with the lazy girl." Chiaki said.

"But... She's defiantly into girls too, right?" Wakaba asked. "She said so."

"Definitely." Utena said.

"Well, that's a relief." Wakaba said, surprising Chiaki who hid it well. "I mean, it would suck if she wasn't, right?"

Utena smiled and hugged Wakaba. "Oh Wakaba, you're always looking out for me." She said.

"Yeah, that's me alright." Wakaba said in an inaudibly soft voice as she hugged her friend back.

Chiaki looked over at Kaori with concern.

Kaori nodded. "Trouble." She said softly, agreeing with her girlfriend's unspoken assessment of the situation.

===================================================

"I don't think it's too out of the ordinary for me to consider things in that regard, do you?" Saionji pressed his point. A point which Juri had frankly not cared to try to find in the midst of the hot air and bluster that was blowing her way the first time. She was getting a headache.

"Saionji, I really don't see how arguing about this is going to change things." Miki said, reasonable as usual.

Juri had been talking with Miki Kaoru in the piano room after classes. She'd come in hopes of finding an unbiased ear to talk with about some things, and hopefully get a free recital from her genius musically gifted friend at the same time. She'd gotten the first thing, and was feeling marginally less confused about things, but Miki had only gotten part of the way through one song when Kyouichi Saionji had come in, whining, ostensibly, about the new dullest they'd heard about again.

"Oh will you shut up, boy?" Saionji sneered at Miki. "Do you practice being so much of a know it all, or is it simply a result of-"

"Leave him alone, Kyouichi." Juri turned back to face the tall green haired Student Council vice president, her voice fierce yet in control.

"Mind your tongue, and remember who your talking to, woman." Saionji narrowed his eyes at her.

"Get over yourself." Juri stared him down. "No one wants to hear your whining. I don't, I'm sure Miki doesn't. We both know you don't care about this new dullest pretense of yours, you're just preening and strutting until you get up the nerve to finally challenge me to a duel."

"Why you..."

"Either make the challenge, or leave." Juri said, her voice growing more icy by the minute.

"Fine! I'll leave. For now." Saionji said. "But I'll remember this, and when it is time for our dual, I promise you, you'll regret taking this attitude towards me." He said it and abruptly turned and strode out of the room.

"Ass." Juri said, turning and leaning one handed against the piano, rubbing her face, her better mood now seemingly spoiled.

"Well, it is Saionji after all." Miki said. "If he acted any other way, I think it would be even more of a shock."

Juri smiled and laughed just a little bit.

"Why do you think he keeps delaying like this though?" Miki asked, sitting back at the piano and looking over at Juri.

"Who knows." Juri groaned. "I almost wish he'd just get it over with already though."

"He doesn't think he can beat you yet." Miki put forward.

"Mm?" Juri looked over at him with interest as Miki paged through the sheets of music he had before him.

"It's true. I've heard he's been putting in long evenings at the fencing hall - preparing, I would guess..."

"Hmm. He really is serious about this, isn't he?" Juri said, a slight thread of worry cropping up despite herself. Regardless of how Anthy affected her, the thought of her engaged to that truculent jackass was simply in no way acceptable to her. She couldn't let Saionji win, there was no way she could let him - No. Way.

"I think he is, yes." Miki said. "If you'd like, we could spar together more often?" He offered. "I know you keep in practice, but..."

"But that might not be enough this time, I think you might be right." Juri agreed. "Thank you, Miki." She said with affection. "You're a good friend."

"So are you." Miki returned the complement. "So. Tomorrow morning, say, a half an hour before classes?"

"Fine. The usual place?" Juri smiled.

"I'll be there." Miki confirmed. "...Would you still like to stay a while, while I play?" He asked.

"No... I think I... Utena?" Juri was greeted by the unexpected sight of the girl she'd spent most of the time she'd been talking with Miki discussing.

"Um yeah. Hi." Utena said rather ill-at-ease all of a sudden. She'd been looking for Juri and someone had told her that she could find her in one of the music rooms. She'd heard the last part of the argument that had just happened from down the hall. "Is this a bad time?"

"...Ah, uh, no, no!" Juri fumbled with what to say. "I mean, it's a nice surprise."

"Yeah?" Utena asked, with interest.

"Yeah." Juri hastened to cross the space between them as Utena stepped into the room. "It is." She said. "So, um, were you looking for me, or, did you just walk by the building and hear yelling out the window?"

"I was looking for you. I thought, I don't know, we could... hang out. Together. Or something." She didn't seem to be getting more eloquent with practice around this girl, did she? "What was that about, anyway?" Utena turned her head momentarily in the direction Saionji had went to indicate what she was referring to.

"That was about Saionji being a jerk, as usual. No real news." Juri explained, signs of her exasperation with the truth of that statement still evident in her tone.

"Oh... He had a student council uniform too, didn't he?" Utena noticed. "That must be really bad, if you have to put up with someone like that all the time." She sympathized.

"It's not fun." Juri admitted. "He's the vice president, actually. This is Miki by the way." She remembered her manners finally and introduced the other person in the room who was watching the exchange with some amusement. "He's a council member also."

"Oh, um, hi there. It's nice to meet you." Utena bowed slightly as Miki got up from his piano bench and came over to shake hands lightly with her.

"It's nice to meet you as well, Miss Tenjou. Juri speaks very highly of you." Miki said, pointedly.

"Oh yeah?" Utena smiled.

"Miki..." Juri rubbed her face, leaning against the wall.

"I think you made a positive impression on her." Miki smiled, leaning in closer to Utena. "Not always the easiest thing to do, if you believe the rumors about her."

"Really? And what rumors would those be?" Utena asked playfully.

"You two can stop any time now, you know?" Juri pointed out in mock exasperation at the easy friendly banter that seemed to come naturally between the two.

"Okay." Utena agreed easily, exchanging a look with Miki, whom she had seemed to instantly have taken a liking to. "So, do you want to, maybe go get something to eat?" She asked Juri. [Did I just ask her out on a date?] Utena's mind panicked a little. [I didn't mean to do that!]

Juri met Utena's gaze. "I would love to do that." She said, moving closer to the other girl and taking up Utena's left hand in her right. "Thank you for the invitation."

Miki looked uncomfortable now, Utena noticed.

"Oh, um. We can bring your friend along." Utena hastened to add. "You know, if you want to?" She offered, wanting to be sure and to offer Juri an out if the other girl really did think this was a date. [I'm taking this slow, remember? Be her friend first?] Utena reminded herself firmly.

Juri looked over at Miki.

"No, I think three would be a crowd in this instance." Miki smiled in amiable fashion. "Besides, I do need to keep in practice, and I was looking forward to having some time to play this afternoon. It is what I came here for after all, and I have yet to even play one song all the way through."

"I'm sorry about that..." Juri said.

"It's okay." Miki reassured her. "I'm glad we had a chance to talk."

"Thanks." Juri said. "Um, so..." She turned back to Utena, seeming a bit uneasy. "Should we go?"

Utena smiled and nodded yes, and they walked out of the room, still holding hands.

Miki went back to the piano and began to play a song. Juri and Utena listened to it as they walked down the hallway.

===================================================

To be continued...

[End notes: There's quite a few stories I'm writing, not all posted online yet; let me know if you like this one and want me to keep updating it. The stories that receive the most feedback are likely to be the ones I update most often.

In addition to positive feedback, constructive criticism, requests for what you'd like to see happen next, or just general comments are all completely welcome.

wishing you all the best,
Jess27]

Chapter 4

Title: Part 4: Lilly Blossoms, Romance In Spring...

Part 4 "Lilly Blossoms, Romance In Spring..."

===================================================

"Thanks for this." Utena said a little softly as they walked down the cobblestone sidewalk in the town that surrounded the school, holding hands. Utena had thought to go to the cafeteria for their date (maybe it was a date, Utena wasn't sure and wasn't going to ask Juri if it was or not). Juri has suggested they go to a restaurant in town she liked instead though, and Utena, having thought that saying no might insult the girl she liked, said yes (even though she was worried that this might be taking things too fast, because of Anthy Himemiya and everything - she'd planned to be friends first after all...).

Students in Utena's grade weren't allowed to leave campus unaccompanied without getting permission and letting the school know where they were going and when they'd be back first. Because Juri was older, in a higher grade, and on the student council besides, it hadn't been any trouble for her to take Utena with her to town for the evening without getting permission first.

"You're having a good time then?" Juri asked back, squeezing Utena's hand a little.

Utena smiled just a little shyly. "Yeah... I am."

"...Me too." Juri said, smiling a little to herself. It was obvious to her Utena liked her, though she could tell the younger girl was trying to hide it somewhat, which she found cute. On the way into town, they'd mostly just talked about class work, but it had still been completely absorbing to her. She liked this girl a lot too, she had to admit that. She had to admit too, that it was nice just to be with a girl who let things be... simple. Who was just straight forward and honest with her. Who she didn't have to wonder about all the time.

"So, what kind of place is it we're going to anyway?" Utena asked.

"It's called the White Lilly Café. It's not expensive or anything. It's owned by a local family. Simple dishes, but the food is very good. It's, you know, the kind of food that leaves you feeling good after you've eaten it... and there's a great view of the river." She said. "You'll like it."

"I'm, um, I'm sure I will." Utena said a bit shyly. [A view of the river? This is definitely a date.] She realized a little nervously.

===================================================

When they were seated at the café, the waitress asked if they wanted any drinks to start. Juri ordered green tea; Utena ordered tea as well, but chose Darjeeling. They were left with menus, and the view of the river. There were white golden rayed lilies growing by the riverbanks. "I guess I know where the restaurant got it's name now." Utena spoke, gazing over at the flowers.

Juri smiled. "They are pretty, aren't they?" She asked softly.

Utena met Juri's eyes. [Not as pretty as you are.] She thought a little wistfully. "They are. You were right, I like it here already." She smiled a little softly, feeling a few butterflies fluttering in her stomach. This was her first real date after all. There had been a boy she'd kind of liked once (more as a friend than anything though), and they'd gone with friends to a festival. Technically that might have been a date, she guessed, but that had been nothing like this. She'd had fun at the festival, but... Even just sitting here and looking into Juri's eyes, there was just no way the two experiences were at all similar.

"I'm glad." Juri said, reaching across the table and taking Utena's hand in hers.

Utena felt like she was supposed to do something, say something important or something. There was this... sense of urgency somehow, in her chest, or her throat... she didn't really know what to do about it though. "How... um, how'd you find this place?" She asked. It was kind of an out of the way spot, she'd noticed that as they'd walked here.

"I like to walk, I guess. And this is a nice part of town." She explained, her voice still soft, their eyes still meeting one another. Utena didn't look away, or look like she wanted to, and Juri liked that about her. Even though she could tell Utena was a little nervous of her at the moment.

"Am I the first person you've taken here?" Utena asked.

"...no, you're not." Juri said honestly.

"Oh... um..." Utena hesitated, a little unsure what to say now, and kind of embarrassed she'd asked the question in the first place.

"The first I've taken here on a date though." Juri smiled. She usually came here with her mother, as a place to get away and talk about things.

"...So this is a date, huh?" Utena smiled, happy with herself despite the fact that things weren't going like she'd planned.

"You don't want it to be?" Juri asked a little playfully.

"No, I um, I want it to be." Utena smiled again, feeling even more happiness and... hopefulness, for the future, welling up inside her. This felt right. Being here with Juri, it felt right to her. Like she'd found a part of herself that mattered... mattered a lot. Whether Juri ended up being the one for her or not, in the end.

"Well, I'm glad for that..." Juri smiled, fascinated with the way Utena's eyes looked. They were always so... just so... there - in the moment.

The waitress came back with their tea right then. "Everything's going well?" She asked a little fondly of the scene before her.

"Seems that way." Juri replied, releasing Utena's hand and looking to the older woman and then back to Utena as the waitress poured the tea.

"Have you decided on your order yet?" The waitress asked.

"...I know what I want, but I don't think my date..."

"It's okay, I'll just have one of whatever you're having." Utena offered.

"You're sure?" Juri asked.

"Mm-hmm." Utena nodded, handing her menu over to the waitress.

"...Two of my regular order then, I guess." Juri told the waitress.

"I'll have your order out to you in a while then." The waitress informed them. "You have enough water for the tea?"

They both said that they did and thanked her and she left.

"That was brave of you, trusting my taste in food like that." Juri said playfully.

"Really? That bad, huh?" Utena joked a little.

"No, you'll probably like it." Juri smiled. "Unless you don't like sea food, I guess." She qualified.

"No, seafood's fine." Utena told her. "...as long as there's no tuna involved."

"No tuna." Juri smiled.

"That's good." Utena smiled a little in relief. She could eat tuna, but she'd never really liked to.

"Not a picky eater then?" Juri asked.

"Nope. You?" Utena asked back, liking how easy it was to talk to this girl. Like they'd known each other longer than they had. That had to be a good sign, she figured.

"Not mostly... I don't like bread or noodles very much though for some reason, or red meat. Other than that, though, I like to be adventurous." She told her.

"Adventurous, huh?" Utena bantered back playfully. "I guess you'd have to be to be, as good at fencing as you are."

Juri found her eyes traveling to Utena's ring. A rose crest ring, just like hers. "We have the same ring, did you notice?" She asked, holding up the hand she had her own ring on. She'd only noticed it on the walk to town, just as they'd left school grounds in fact, but she hadn't brought it up until now. She wasn't sure she wanted to though, in fact she'd been avoiding it. But Utena's innocent question had been too much of a reminder for her to let herself ignore it anymore. If Utena was just one more mystery girl that she couldn't be sure of like Anthy, she wanted to know now before she risked her heart too much. Honestly, she wasn't at all sure how much more her heart could take.

Utena looked at the ring and was caught speechless. "That ring..." She said. "Why do you have that ring?" Utena met her eyes, all of the sudden in a completely different frame of mind. Thinking back all those years ago...

"...you mean, you don't know?" Juri asked curiously.

"Know what?" Utena asked.

Juri sighed and folded her hands together in the air a little ways under her chin. "Why don't you tell me... how you came to have yours then?" She asked softly, ready to listen with an open mind.

Utena looked into Juri's eyes. She had very much not expected this. She hadn't noticed Juri had that ring before now. How had she not noticed that, she wondered? It was a small detail, one easily overlooked, she supposed. But still, somehow, she thought she should have seen it right away. Looking into Juri's eyes though, she couldn't help but trust her enough to share her story. "When I was a small girl, and my parents had died... everyone tried to be nice, but it didn't help, so I must have ran away. I remember, I was alone in the forest in a field of wild flowers where my family used to go on picnics. I don't remember it all that well - not the details at least, just the big things. You might not believe this, but a young man appeared, a traveling prince, riding upon a white horse. He had a regal bearing and a kind smile."

Juri regarded the soft, wistful look on Utena's face and couldn't believe she was being dishonest with her about this, so what she was saying had to be the truth.

"The prince came dawn from his horse, wrapped me in a rose-scented embrace and gently wiped the tears from my eyes." She closed her eyes to remember what he'd said to her all those years ago. She'd never forgotten the words. "'Little one,' he said, 'who bears up alone in such deep sorrow, never lose that strength or nobility, even when you grow up. I give you this to remember this day. We will meet again. This ring will lead you to me one day.' And then he left." She opened her eyes and met Juri's gaze. "I... I never knew what it all meant, but from that day on, I've always wanted to be like that. To be a prince, like he was. To help others, like he helped me."

Juri smiled a little. "That's a nice idea. Somehow, I can believe that about you too." She said, looking down at her own ring. It was like something from a fairy tale, what Utena had said. No fairy tale she'd ever heard of course, but still, that's what it had sounded like. But Utena had spoken with such gentle honesty, Juri had to believe her. And it wasn't as though that would be the strangest thing she'd ever encountered. Not by a long shot. In fact, somehow, it just... made sense to her. "And you've never seen this prince again?" She asked.

"No, never." Utena told her. "You believe me then? You don't think I'm making it up?" She asked. Her uncle had always told her that she'd imagined it, though her aunt had been too kind to say so and had simply said that little girls needed to believe in magic sometimes. She wasn't really sure why she'd been so honest with Juri about it though, she'd never told anyone else but Wakaba that story before, and even though Wakaba had been nice about it, Utena could tell she hadn't believed her either.

"No, I don't think that at all in fact." Juri smiled softly to her, picking up Utena's hand in hers again and brushing the other girl's ring finger with her thumb. It was another mystery, true, or another part of one big mystery they were both wrapped up in, but that Utena seemed as much in the dark about it as she made her feel a lot better for some reason. Like she was less alone now, somehow.

"Why not...? Juri, how can you have a ring just like mine? What does it mean?" Utena asked.

Juri smiled. "I couldn't tell you what it means." She told her simply. "But, like everyone else in the student council, I received mine in a letter. A letter from someone calling themselves 'End of the World'. The letter said, that this ring, marked me as a duelist."

"A... a duelist? But... what does that mean?" Utena asked.

Juri closed her eyes a moment and then opened them again. "These rings, they're like keys. To a secret place, at the school. The Forbidden Forest." She smiled a little. "You wouldn't believe what's in there unless you saw it for yourself." She told her. "And because you have that ring, I suppose you can. I suppose you were meant to. Just like the rest of us. Well... maybe not just like us. For you, it seems like all this has been in your life a lot longer, even if you didn't know that."

"...I guess so. So, can you tell me... what's inside the forest? Is... does the prince live there?" She asked.

Juri sighed. "He might, for all I know. If he does though, where he lives, there's no way to reach it... not that we know of at least. We don't even know if it's real, not for sure."

"If what's real?" Utena asked.

"...The castle." Juri told her softly. "Within the forest, there is a tall, winding staircase, that leads to a flat dueling field... on a... like this." Juri took the saucer from under her tea cup and held it up with a fork underneath it at an angle. "Above that, in the sky, there's..." Juri stopped and smiled a little ruefully. "Well, like I said, you'll have to see it for yourself. It's a little much to ask anyone to believe without having seen it." She confessed.

"...I'm not sure I want to believe any of this." Utena admitted. And it was true, this was all so... so strange. But the rings were real. She'd always held onto that truth, growing up. "I do though." She said softly. "This... this letter you got, did it say anything else?"

"That the winner of the duels, he or she would be given the power to bring revolution to the world." Juri told her.

"Duels... You fight duels? Real ones? With swords?"

Juri nodded 'yes'.

"And... revolution... what..." Utena sighed. "I want to see this... place, the one inside the forest. Will you take me there? Tonight?" Utena asked.

"...I will. I promise." Juri told her.

"Good." Utena said. "...But, until then... can we just talk about something else for a while?" She asked. "I mean... this is still a date, right?" She smiled a little. "I... want to find out more about you, just... you know, talk some more." She asked softly.

"...I'd love that." Juri smiled to her, finding herself once more charmed by the way Utena looked at her, that gentle smile of hers.

===================================================

They talked a little more, and dinner came. Juri had been right about the food, Utena had to agree, it was some of the best food she'd ever had. Through the meal, they continued their conversation. They avoided all talk of duels and rose crest rings - though those things, despite how wonderful a time she found herself having, never left Utena's mind.

There had been times she'd almost convinced herself she'd imagined her meeting with the kind prince after all. That she'd simply found the ring in the woods and made a story up about it, then told it to herself so many times she'd come to believe it true. This though... she'd told Juri she believed her, and in her heart she did somehow, but her head was telling her how crazy it all sounded. That maybe Juri was just making all of this up for some reason (though she very much didn't want to think Juri would do something like that). That's why she wanted to see it for herself. Whatever it was. Then she'd know. Then she'd know if she'd been right to hold onto this story of the prince so long and not let it, or the lesson it had taught her, go.

Somehow though, she had this feeling, somewhere inside, that this, all of this, that there was a meaning to it. That her life had a meaning to it, that there was something she was meant to do, someone she was meant to be. Not necessarily that it was all planned out, but more like... something inside her wouldn't let her go, wouldn't let her disbelieve. Not until she had proof.

Until then though, she was having a really good time on her date.

"We met them over break last year." Utena explained. She'd been telling Juri about her friends. How she and Wakaba had been best friends for a long time, since Utena had come to her rescue when a boy had been being mean to her (this was when they were both seven). Now she was telling her about Kaori and Chiaki, that they were a really good couple and everything, and now how she and Wakaba met them. "Wakaba and I signed up for the class trip to Sidney, Australia." The school had arranged it through a travel agency who's owner was on the governing board. It had been to expose students to other cultures, other parts of the world. It was all part of the school's 'cultural enrichment' activities. "Wakaba's dad and Kaori's mom were both chaperones. Everybody knows that they're gay though, apparently, so no one was really making an effort to be their friends."

"But you did... because you had that in common I guess." Juri ventured.

"Not really, I didn't even know about that actually when I went over to them. I didn't know that about myself then either really." She admitted.

"When'd you figure it out then?" Juri asked curiously as they continued to gaze into one another's eyes. It was kind of amazing how comfortable Juri felt just doing that with this girl.

"...When you first smiled at me?" Utena admitted just a little shyly.

"Really?" Juri asked.

"...Yeah. That actually was the moment it happened." She smiled a little.

"...I'm very flattered then." Juri smiled, actually feeling her cheeks warm at that. She looked down and ate a little of the chocolate dish she and Utena were sharing for dissert. It was rich and cool to taste, but the syrup was still a little warm. It was really quite a complement to get. "So, um, what happened next... in the story you were telling?" She met Utena's eyes again and felt even more drawn to them now somehow. Maybe Utena's confession had just stroked her ego or something, and it probably had of course, but honestly, Juri didn't think it was that at all that was making her feel this way.

"Oh, well... anyone could see those two were having more fun than anyone, even though they were kind of just in their own private world together. I'd never really noticed them at school before, but I did then, and I said to Wakaba we should go make friends with them. And we did. They were really nice and we just, um, kind of clicked, you know? We've been friends ever since. We ended up going everywhere as a group all the rest of break. My favorite place we went was the opera house, you know, the famous one. Have you been there?"

"I have, actually, when I was a little girl. My father travels, for business. My parents took me to see an opera... I don't remember it very well, the opera itself I mean. But I had fun. My mom said I clapped at the end, and that it's one of her favorite memories of me." Juri told her.

"Maybe... maybe one day we'll go there together then?" Utena found herself saying.

"...That would be really nice, actually." Juri said back.

Utena sighed. "It's getting kind of late, isn't it?" She asked with some regret.

A little surprised, Juri looked over at the sky. It did look like the sun was going to set before all that long, now that Utena had mentioned it. "Huh, I hadn't noticed." She admitted with a small smile. "I... guess I've just been having too much of a pleasant evening, I didn't want it to end so soon." She said meeting Utena's eyes again.

Utena smiled back. "Really?" She asked.

"Mm-hmm. I guess I should take you back though, shouldn't I? And... I have a promise to keep, don't I?" She looked down at her hand and the ring there.

"...Yes, you do." Utena said softly.

Juri looked up and their eyes met again and that made her feel better again. It made Juri wonder just how it was Utena Tenjou quite made her feel this way. Not that she was complaining. She felt more herself... more centered, more grounded, than she had in a long time, and she was sure Utena was the reason for it.

"I'll call for the check then." Juri said back softly. "We can take the rest of the dissert to go, if you want?" She offered.

"Yeah, I'd like that." Utena smiled. It really was very good chocolate, they'd just kind of ignored it in favor of their conversation though so far, and now it was too late. Not that Utena was complaining at all, because she was doing anything but. As first dates went, this one had to be one of the best ever. At least... the date part of it was. Maybe not the strange revelations part...

===================================================

Some time later, after Juri had paid for their meal and they'd walked back to campus, Utena and Juri were walking through the school grounds on their way to the Forbidden Forrest, holding hands. There was hardly anyone out at this time. The sun was low in the sky and it would be dark soon. They saw a group of students laughing and talking pass not that far away. They were noticed and some of them made comments about them to others in their group but neither Utena nor Juri could hear, so what they said could have been anything really. Juri didn't seem to care about it though, and Utena was too distracted with thoughts of what they were going to see for it to even register that much on her. She did notice how warm Juri's hand was in hers though, and how nice it felt.

They'd both fallen silent around the time they'd re-entered Ohtori Academy grounds. Juri had stopped to hold the door open for her and their eyes had met. They'd looked into one another's eyes silently and the moment had seemed frozen in time. As Utena walked, Juri's eyes then still seemed to possess her imagination. Her heart was beating a little faster too as the forest came into view before them and they walked steadily towards it.

"These duels you fight, do you always win?" Utena asked as they went.

"...so far." Juri answered softly. "When all this started, there was a sort of... tournament. Since then, I've never lost." Left unspoken was how very close she'd come to losing a few times; how, once or twice, she'd very much risked her life to win, and how, in those moments, what had made her pull through had always been... Anthy.

Utena was silent as they walked up the stone stairway that lead to the forest. They came to a what she supposed was the gate Juri had told her about on the walk back. A stone porch before a stone wall, the shape of roses carved into the stone on either side. In the center there was... a handle. Juri took her hand in hers and gently guided her hand to the handle. "Just take hold of it. You have your ring, so it should open for you."

"...okay, here goes, I guess." Utena said, taking hold of the handle. Things seemed to get unnaturally quiet for a moment, and then the sound of water, like a drop of water falling from a tap. And then the a single drop of water fell sideways onto the ring on her finger and she withdrew it. "It's cold." She said softly, turning to look into Juri's eyes as water started to poor from either side of the garden's gate. Utena turned to watch it. A mist started to rise, and there were soft sounds of things shifting, stone moving against stone. She could hardly see.

"It's alright." Juri said softly, taking her in her arms a little. Utena enjoyed the feeling, despite the odd situation, and found herself gazing into Juri's eyes again for a moment. The moment was quiet and meaningful somehow, though Utena couldn't say exactly how. Her words seemed caught in her throat, but she felt super alive, even though there was this sort of dream-like quality in the air around them.

Soon, the mists cleared and the gate had opened and somehow changed into a large rose in bloom, and beneath it, the entryway. Curious and more than a little struck with awe, Utena went forwards, Juri following behind. Before them was a wide walkway that shone like it was made of metal or polished stone. Pillars on either side of the walkway with pink, violet, and white roses growing on them. All around them, a little in the distance, was the forest, shrouded in mists. And ahead, a winding ramp that went up and up around a tilted pillar. Looking up, Utena could see only clouds.

"This place is so... how is this possible?" Utena asked softly.

"If someone knows, they haven't told me. Some kind of magic, I suppose." Juri said softly from behind her. "Do you want to keep going?"

"Yes, of course... I mean, I have to see." Utena told her.

"Then let's go." Juri smiled softly to her and took her hand as they started to walk down the walkway together.

Utena smiled a little to herself at how much she liked holding hands with this girl. She'd never really done this sort of thing before. Oh, her and Wakaba had held hands before sometimes, but... it had never felt like this. Holding hands with Wakaba always felt just... happy, and fun. This was... she couldn't think of a word for it. The feeling was just... more... she couldn't wrap her head around all of it, really. She felt like she needed time to think about it, later.

They reached the base of the pillar and it was apparent now that the path that wound up around the slanted pillar, like Juri had said, had steps. Steps wide enough for a parade to travel up with room to spare. "How far does this go up?" Utena asked in a somewhat reverent voice.

"...A long way. It takes around an hour to get there if you just walk." She told her.

"Oh..." Utena said simply.

"We'll be out until at least midnight if we keep going, probably later. We can always come back later if you want?" Juri offered.

"Mm-mm... no way." Utena replied. "There's no way I'll be able to sleep if I don't see what's up there now." She told her a little ruefully.

Juri smiled a little at that.

"Kaori would say 'Onwards and upwards we march'." Utena said further as they started to walk, feeling oddly relaxed about all of this now. For the moment at least. Somehow, having Juri here with her made her feel... like everything would turn out okay. Maybe she shouldn't trust the other girl quite so easily, they'd only just met after all, but she found she did anyway.

"Why would she say that?" Juri asked, a smile still on her lips.

"Apparently her parents are always talking about 'the march of progress', so she talks about marching places a lot... mostly because she thinks it's funny I think." Utena told her. "It's just part of how she talks."

"I kind of want to meet her more now." Juri replied.

"She's one of a kind alright." Utena smiled fondly.

"Utena..." Juri spoke after a while.

"Yeah?" Utena asked, still kind of in awe of the fact that all this was here. The Forrest, the stairs, all of it.

"I'm... I'm really glad you asked me out today." She told her honestly.

Utena looked over to the girl beside her. "Me too." She smiled to her a little shyly. "Although... I guess I didn't mean for it to be a date when I asked you." She admitted.

"You didn't?" Juri asked, feeling a little disappointed at that.

"No... um, see, I had this whole idea that maybe I should just try to be friends... I mean... you didn't exactly say what 'complicated' was... with Anthy I mean... I guess, I just thought... if we were friends first, then I'd be able to figure out if it was really okay to ask you for a date." She explained.

"Oh... that makes sense I guess..." Juri said a little softly, thoughts of Anthy a little disquieting at the moment somehow. A little confusing.

"...Can I ask, what exactly is going on with you two? I mean... you're... just roommates, right?" She asked hopefully.

"...Not exactly, no." Juri admitted.

"...what then?" Utena asked softly.

Juri was silent a moment. "It's all wrapped up in all of this." She finally said. "If you want the truth, technically I guess, me and Anthy are... engaged to be married."

Utena stopped abruptly. "...you're kidding, right?" She was, to say the least, kind of shocked.

"That's how it works... whoever is the current champion of the duels, is engaged to the Rose Bride, and that's her. That's Anthy." Juri said, not meeting Utena's eyes.

"...and you didn't think telling me that before was important?" Utena asked.

"No, it's just..." Juri sighed. "Can we keep walking while we talk about this? It's... it's a long explanation I guess." She said, a little unsure of herself in this.

Utena considered a moment. "...Alright, we can do that I guess." She finally said.

When they resumed walking, they weren't holding hands anymore, and Juri sharply felt the loss of that. It hurt, some at least, and she couldn't help resenting Anthy a little for it, and all of this. It really didn't make that much sense, and it wasn't fair, maybe least of all to Anthy herself. Who would choose to be the Rose Bride and have to do whatever someone who won you in a duel said, after all?

"We received the letters the first day of school at the start of second term last year." Juri said.

Utena did the math. Right now, it was just a little ways into the 2nd half of the school year. So this whole thing had been going on for about a year now. Right here in her school and she'd never known it. Even with this though, a part of her still wanted to reach over and take Juri's hand again. She didn't though, she needed an answer first. She needed to know the truth about Anthy Himemiya.

"Touga introduced her to us. He told us that when he'd used the ring, opened the gate to the forest and traveled to the top where we're going, that Anthy had been there waiting for him. His letter had told him she would be." She went on to explain. "So... we got her enrolled as a student, and we followed the rules that the letters gave us." She paused a moment.

"...That's it, you just did what the letters said? You didn't question it?" Utena asked, a little outraged at the whole thing. It seemed kind of barbaric to her.

"Of course we had questions, but there was no one to ask... and we all had our reasons for wanting what the letters promised." Juri told her honestly. "For wanting to bring revolution to the world." She felt it then again, and it was a surprise somehow, that sharp pain in her heart at thinking of why that was for her. Of thinking of Shiori. She hadn't felt it quite so intensely for quite some time. Maybe letting her heart trust again as much as she had with Utena tonight was the cause... in any case, she stubbornly closed that part of herself off again, unable to deal with it now. She wasn't really sure she'd ever be able to 'deal' with it. Maybe when you were hurt like that, you just... stayed hurt.

"...But... do you even know what that means?" Utena asked. Even being here in this place, she still wasn't completely sure how much she should believe of this.

"...No, not really... when I came here though, and saw that castle... when you see it, maybe you'll understand. I just had to know. I had to find out what it all meant..." She considered what she was going to say next, but decided she had to be honest. "And besides, I couldn't just not go along with it. I mean, what would have happened to her if I hadn't?" She said quietly.

"To Anthy, you mean." Utena said the obvious thing.

"She's not a normal girl, Utena... She has to do whatever I tell her to, whatever the one who's engaged to her asks her. I mean, it could be anything... and she'd do it, just because..." She trailed off.

"Just because you won her in a duel." Utena finished for her.

"Essentially, yes." Juri said. "And I know... it's a real... curse... or whatever you want to call it. She has a sword..." Juri covered the center of her chest right above her breasts with her hand. "Right here, inside of her."

"Inside of her, but..." Utena struggled to picture it.

"I know, it sounds impossible, but... whoever wins the duels has the power to draw the sword from within her, just like magic. She says this... a magic spell or something, to call it out of her."

"Do you remember the words?" Utena asked silently, trying to wrap her thoughts around all of this.

"I don't think I could ever forget..." Juri said. "She says: 'Rose of the noble castle. Power of Dios that sleeps within me. Head you master and come forth.' The hilt of the sword comes out of her framed in bright glowing light, I take hold of it and draw it out. The letters name it as The Sword of Dios."

"And she... she doesn't know what any of this is about either?" She asked.

"All she'll say is that it's a mystery... but I get the feeling something bad will happen, at least to her, if the duels don't go on. If this doesn't happen the way it needs to happen." Juri confided, though she very much wished she didn't have to talk about any of this with Utena, at least not yet. She could hardly avoid doing so though, now that Utena knew to ask. "I could, perhaps, command her to tell me everything she knows, and if she's hiding anything, in theory, she'd have to tell me I suppose. But... I've never once told her to do anything, and I never will. That's why I have to win... So that no one else ever will either." Juri said. "I mean... Miki wouldn't take advantage of her, I'm sure of it, but the other two?" She shuddered. "I don't want to think about it. They'd probably scar her for life, just from how obnoxious they are. Saionji especially..." The fact that he was a jerk aside, Juri had always had a bad feeling about him somehow. She couldn't put her finger on what it was about him exactly, but she trusted him even less than she did Touga, and that was saying something (because just about everything Touga Kiryuu said was half-truths and innuendo of some sort).

Utena was silent for a few steps. "I understand..." She said softly. "I mean, of course you'd have to do that." And it made sense. Utena wasn't sure she wouldn't have done the same thing in that situation. It actually was a brave thing to do. "But... you don't have feelings for her, do you?" She asked, feeling a little insure about it somehow. She didn't like feeling that way, but she apparently did anyway.

Juri sighed. "Most of the time I don't even know how I feel about her, if you want the real truth." And that was true of course, but it was a lie of omission. There was more there between her and Anthy than she wanted Utena to know. Everything she'd told Utena about her reasons was true though, it was just, when someone does something, there's usually two reasons, one selfless and one selfish. And Juri knew, her selfish reason was that she did in fact have feelings for Anthy, even if she wasn't sure what they were. It didn't matter though, she told herself, because nothing could ever come of it. Not ever. Not as long as Anthy was... who she was.

"...What do you mean by that?" Utena asked, not understanding how that could be true.

"Anthy, she... she kind of has this way of... of just... getting to me. Like, she can see all the things inside myself that I wouldn't... wouldn't really want anyone else to see, and... I can never pin down how she does it, but it's like, one brick at a time... any walls I have in my heart, she just... takes them apart... most of the time I don't even really notice when she does it. It drives me up the wall sometimes, and other times I... find myself just crying, alone in my room, but... I don't know, sometimes I think it could be a good thing too..." She admitted. "I'm sorry... I know that's probably not the answer you wanted to hear."

"No, I guess not... I don't even know what to say about it either, honestly." Utena confessed.

"Guess that makes two of us then... One more thing we have in common. That's... that's kind of good, right?" Juri asked a little hopefully.

It was... what Juri was describing, Utena just didn't know what to think about it... not yet anyway. Whatever the answer was though, Utena was already pretty sure that she'd want to be there for Juri, to help her through it. If Juri would let her that is... Utena considered that a moment and then reached over and took Juri's hand again. "I guess... it'll have to be." She said a little helplessly. [It's not like I'm going to give up on her over this or anything. I'm not sure I could stand to even if that's what I wanted.] She had to admit to herself. [I guess I'll just have to... see what happens.]

"...okay then." Juri said, squeezing Utena's hand a little and smiling softly to herself at the gesture Utena had made.

"...okay then." Utena repeated as they continued to walk up through the clouds towards a castle in the sky.

===================================================

Some time later, they'd climbed past the clouds and to the top of the stairs. It was as bright here as daylight. A castle, a real castle, glowing with lights and moving around and around above them in slow motion like a ballerina on a silent music box. Utena had just stopped and stared a while when she'd first seen it. It was some little while later now though and she and Juri had sat down on the other side of the dueling arena and were slowly eating the rest of the chocolate dissert they'd taken with them from the restaurant.

Up here, it almost felt like they were the only two people in the whole world.

"This is really good." Utena said simply, smiling as she took a bite of it.

"I told you they had good food there." Juri said a little playfully.

"Juri..." Utena said softly.

"Mm, yes?" Juri asked, putting down her plastic spoon.

"You want to figure all of this out too, don't you?" She asked.

"Of course, that's what I said." Juri told her simply, looking at her with curiosity and interest.

"Well, I was thinking... maybe we can figure it out better if we work together. If we're in this together." Utena said, meeting Juri's eyes meaningfully.

"You mean..." Juri smiled a little bemusedly. "As a couple?"

"...Not necessarily... but... yes, if you'd want that... I'd love to be your girlfriend." Utena admitted kind of shyly, uncharacteristically looking down a moment before meeting Juri's eyes again with assurance. "...what do you think?"

"I..." A part of Juri wanted to just say yes to that, but... "I agree about working together to... to figure this out, this mystery... but, I'm not... can we just kind of see were this takes us for now? I'm... I'm just... not really sure were my head is at lately, or my heart, really." Juri admitted softly. "It wouldn't be fair to just... say yes, if I wasn't... If I'm not totally sure."

Utena smiled softly. "That's okay. I... mm, I wouldn't want you to do that either I mean." She said, feeling a little self-conscious. [Dummy.] She thought to herself [Of course she'd say that. What was I thinking... asking her something like that now?] She hadn't really meant to say yes to Juri's question, it had just... come out through...

"I um, I'd like to see you again though. A second date. Can we... meet for lunch tomorrow?" She asked with a charming smiled.

Utena smiled back, feeling happiness well up a little inside. "That'd be great."

===================================================

Later, it was dark out, but the paths on campus were always lit at night. Juri walked Utena back to her dorm, up to the building entrance. "I guess... this is where we say good night." Juri told her softly, touching Utena's cheek as their eyes met and Utena found herself leaning against the wall by the building's front door, Juri so close to her. She felt like something in her was... fluttering... the way Juri was looking at her. [As if I needed any more proof I was into girls.] Utena thought, trying to remember to breathe.

"Yeah, I guess so." She managed to say.

"I'd like to kiss you now." Juri said in a gentle voice, moving just a little closer.

"...go ahead." Utena told her softly, kind of lost in the other girl's eyes. She could barely see them they were so lost in shadow (the light was behind her).

Their lips met and Utena's eyes fell closed. Juri's lips were so soft but so sure too... the kiss was gentle, and so sweet, and it seemed to just go on and on. Utena kissed her back, she just felt like she knew how, knew what to do, even though in the back of her mind she was sure she didn't. It didn't matter though, this was the best feeling in the world. Juri's body so close to her, pressed against her, her hands in Utena's hair, titling her head just so. Utena rested her hands on Juri's hips and moved one up along her side. Her heart was beating like a drum and she wanted this to last forever, or at least longer than it seemed to when Juri moved away.

Their eyes met again and Juri smiled, a little shyly actually. "I... had a really great time with you tonight." She said softly.

"...I did to... with you I mean." Utena said, still a little... dazzled, by the kiss. [My first kiss.] She thought to herself a little dreamily. She wanted to go to Juri and kiss her again, but thought better of it. She didn't want to be too forward again, like she had before. She needed to give Juri more time, and go at her pace, she told herself.

"Well, see you tomorrow then. For lunch? We could meet where we first met?" She asked.

"Sounds good. I'll... see you then. Goodnight, Juri." Utena said, moving forward and touching Juri's hand lightly. They shared another moment looking into each other's eyes and then Juri turned away. Utena watched her walk away for a moment before snapping herself out of it, shaking her head a little, then slapping her cheeks lightly. "Right." She told herself, turning around and going into the building, trying not to think about just how much she wanted to kiss Juri again.

Wakaba would for sure be asleep by now. But she had a feeling she'd have to answer some questions from her friend in the morning.

===================================================

To be continued...

[End notes: There's quite a few stories I'm writing, not all posted online yet; let me know if you like this one and want me to keep updating it. The stories that receive the most feedback are likely to be the ones I update most often.

In addition to positive feedback, constructive criticism, requests for what you'd like to see happen next, or just general comments are all completely welcome.

wishing you all the best,
Jess27]

Chapter 5

Title: Part 5: The Truth, Once Spoken, Is A Requiem...

Part 5 "The Truth, Once Spoken, Is A Requiem..."

===================================================

Juri found herself alone at a ball, sitting in a chair and sipping sparkling water. She was in her student council uniform and was absently watching Anthy and Miki dance. Anthy was in a beautiful dress, and Miki looked very dashing, but she was bored with it. She wasn't supposed to be here alone, she'd made a date with Shiori, but Shiori had just... she'd been stood up, and it left her feeling kind of numb - like there was no point to it, or if there was she didn't know what it could be.

Anthy parted with her dance partner once the song was over and Juri saw Anthy walking towards her as the next song began. Her roommate came up to her and held out her hand, and though Juri didn't want to, she none the less silently took Anthy's offered hand and let the other girl lead her out to the dance floor where they started to dance. Juri couldn't break eye contact, Anthy was smiling to her in that serene yet enigmatic way she had about her. She couldn't help wondering if either of them had a choice but to dance as they were. It certainly didn't seem like she had one at least - whether Anthy did, she considered, she would probably never know.

"Why are we dancing?" Juri found herself asking softly.

"It's a dance, Miss Juri. What else should we do?" Anthy asked back curiously.

"...I'm... not sure, really." Juri replied honestly.

"You can kiss me... if you like. I'm not sure why you haven't already... you obviously want to sometimes." Anthy observed.

"...you know why I can't, Anthy." Juri told her.

"...That doesn't seem very fair, does it?" Anthy told her. "What if we're really both very much in love? Could you even tell? The state that other girl left you in?" She asked.

"...I'm not in love with you, Anthy. Love isn't like that... it's not like this." She insisted.

"What is it like then?" Anthy asked. Though suddenly it wasn't Anthy at all, but Utena Tenjou she was dancing with. "Is it like this?" Utena asked softly, moving closer and touching her cheek, her breath close enough to feel on her lips. Her scent, her warmth, the energy between them...

Juri couldn't help it, she kissed her, she was back on the steps of Utena's dorm, kissing her again. Only this time, she didn't stop, and Utena didn't seem to want her to. She pushed Utena back and they fell into bed. They were in her bed now, not the one at Ohtori, but the one in her family's home that she'd grown up with. It was spring outside, just like that day during summer she'd come here with Shiori and wished so much she could be doing this with her.

They were taking each other's clothes off, Utena smiling to her in that way she did, and Juri kissed her again, hungry to be closer to this girl, get lost in her, never be found again. She was kissing her collar bone, her neck, and then she was on her back and Utena was doing that to her.

Utena's eyes found hers and they possessed her. "I want to make love to you, Juri. Let me?" She asked softly, stroking one of her breasts gently.

"...I'm yours, I promise." Juri told her.

Utena just smiled but didn't say anything back, just kissed her, her tongue invading Juri's mouth, demanding but so gentle somehow.

And then Utena's mouth was at her nipple, licking, nipping, then sucking... it was driving her wild. "Yes..." Juri said softly. "Yes, lover, oh yes..." It felt so good, so right, like she'd been waiting for this. She somehow knew it wasn't real though, in the background of her awareness, in a vague way, she knew it was just a dream, but she didn't want it to stop, so she just ignored that truth and settled for the sweet illusion of her apparently lustful imagination.

Then Utena's eyes were on hers again, and there was no need for words. She felt Utena's hand move in and up her inner thigh, brush over and slightly press into that most precious part of her anatomy. Shivers of emotion flared through her, and she felt herself grow weaker with need.

Her eyes grew darker with that need and she wanted to capture Utena's lips with her own in a more urgent show of passion, but she couldn't move, Utena's eyes on hers just kept her where she was, helpless.

As they moved together, soft moans and sounds of need escaped from her lips. She breathlessly spoke Utena's name, once, twice, then again. Their bodies were pressing into one another, Juri held onto Utena's back, caressed the skin there, and just let herself be taken... let herself be loved.

Utena's fingers inside were driving her on, making her cry out. And her eyes, so soft and sure and just... good. That's what it was, she realized as she reached her climax. Utena was just such a good person, wasn't she? Just being around her, you could feel it... It was so hot.

And then thought was gone, it was just those eyes, those fingers, pressing into her in just the right ways...

"Ohh Utena..." Juri breathed, smiling blissfully as she came down from her release. It had felt so good, she felt so relaxed now. She opened her eyes and Utena was smiling back softly to her, but as she looked into her eyes, Utena just seemed to fade away, and she felt something in her stomach drop. "...don't... don't leave..." She said, and she felt tears, unreasonable tears, escape from her eyes without her wanting them too.

She opened her eyes and she knew she was alone. In bed alone. Of course she was. "Damn." She said softly to herself, feeling frustration. Why couldn't it all be easier? Why couldn't she just listen to her heart and have that be enough? ...why did it have to hurt?

It was darker out, earlier in the day than it had been in her dream. A soft glow was only now beginning to show outside the curtains of her room, just visible as a barely seen illumination on the ceiling above.

She lay there and remembered. It had only been a dream, but, and she had to smile at this, the real Utena wasn't a dream. She wiped the tears from her eyes and closed them. Thinking back to last night... Utena Tenjou, she'd shown up out of the blue again, at the music room this time. And they'd gone on a real date together.

Maybe things would be different this time? Maybe things would be different with her?

Maybe it wouldn't... the truth was, no matter what else was true, it was also true that having that ring, it would have to mark Utena as a duelist. Did that mean that, one day, things were destined to lead them back to the forest, not to eat chocolate and talk, but to duel one another? The thought of doing that... what would she do if that happened? Right now, it didn't seem like it would, but that didn't mean it wouldn't happen.

Was destiny real? Was it just... chance? Or was someone or something out there orchestrating all of this? And if there was some kind of game being played, could she win? Could she overturn the board or change the rules somehow? What did it mean?

And what did it mean that she was... starting to fall in love again.

A prince had given Utena a rose crest ring when her parents had died and she was just a little girl, and Utena had wanted to be just like him. A prince who was also a girl. [Somehow, it works for her.] Juri had to smile at how cute and endearing a story that was. It was also undeniably attractive. Even though it was sad too, how she'd lost her parents at so young an age. [At least, he was there for her...]

But even still, there wasn't anything about Utena Tenjou, it seemed, that Juri didn't find... alluring.

It was curious though. What did this kind prince of Utena's have to do with all this? Was he this Dios that seemed to be at the center of this? (If 'Dios' was even a person, and not something else entirely.) Was he connected to things? To the floating castle? To the duels? To End Of The World even? Because that was a very cheerful thing to call yourself, wasn't it? The more she learned about all of this, it seemed, the more bewildering it was. The more questions she had. How could a bunch of duels fought by a hand full of students at a Japanese scholastic academy really change much of anything in the world? Let alone 'smash the world's shell and bring the world revolution' (as Touga Kiryuu was so fond of putting it). It was ridiculous when you thought about it.

She opened her eyes again, groaned, and sat up, drawing her right hand up and realizing it was wet and smelled of her... pleasure. Of course that's how it had happened, she'd pleased herself and her dreaming imagination had filled in the rest. She drew her legs up and rested her elbows on her knees, her arms straight out and crossed, she rested her chin on one of her biceps. She couldn't go back to sleep. Not after that dream. What was she going to do with the rest of her morning?

"...Miss Juri?"

She heard the familiar voice and looked up, her hands falling from her knees, as her eyes scanned the darkened room. "Anthy? What..."

"Miss Juri… who is Utena?" Anthy's voice asked.

Breath caught in Juri's throat a moment, and she then moved to turn on the lamp at the side of the bed.

A click sounded as she turned the switch and warm light illumined the room. The light from the low wattage bulb was soft and not harsh, but Juri still had to blink her eyes a few times before they adjusted properly to the new light levels. Anthy was sitting in a chair by the window.

She didn't have her glasses on, and that felt strange when their eyes met. Anthy blinked once. "Who is she?" Anthy asked for a third time. Her voice was strangely vulnerable.

"Anthy..." Juri just looked at her. The other girl was wearing shorts and a sleep shirt with the picture of a dolphin on it, and her legs were tucked up under her to the side on a well upholstered beige chair that set by the window in her spacious bedroom. By her position, it looked as though Anthy had been sitting there looking out the window; and, indeed, the curtains were open just enough for her to see though. "Why are you in my room?" Juri asked blankly.

Anthy's gaze dropped. "I'm sorry... I'll leave." Anthy demurred, getting to her feet. Her bare feet made no sound on the carpet.

Juri wanted to say something else, but she really was at a loss for words just then. In a quiet way, her mind was reeling. Anthy had been sitting in her room looking out the window at night with the lights out. And the way her voice had sounded when she'd asked what she had...

Juri rested her elbows on her knees and looked down to her hands.

The dream. She must have been talking in her sleep. Is that why Anthy had been there? Had she been.... loud?

Juri shuddered a little at that thought.

And then, of course, another thought occurred as she realized, besides her hand, she felt decidedly damp between her legs. She smelled like sex, it was definitely time for a morning shower.

...It would give her a little more time to think anyway, before she had to deal with facing Anthy again.

She shook her head in silent surprise at it all... Her life just refused to stay even close to mundane these days, it seemed. And it wasn't even five o'clock yet. How did she get in a situation like this?

She considered the dream though, as she rather mechanically got out of bed and set about making ready for her shower. And despite the oddness that awaited her upon waking, a smile couldn't help itself from appearing on her lips. Even with the emotional angst and bittersweet pain that usually accompanied Shiori in her dreams, that had to be just about the best dream she'd ever had... she couldn't remember it all completely of course, but she could remember enough, and vividly so.

She set the water to running and set a few more morning shower related items in their needed places. She'd never figure Anthy out, she told herself. [She's not my girlfriend. She never has been. I'm not going to let her do it to me this time. I had a great time with Utena last night. It was fun. It was me, actually going on a real, normal date with someone that I really like, who likes me in return, and not feeling like my life is a soap opera with a bad punch line for once. I will enjoy this feeling.] She commanded herself as she stepped under the water.

[...Still.] She thought a few minutes later. [My dream was right about Anthy too, wasn't it…] She couldn't help the mix of emotions that the other girl had stirred in her. [...I do have feelings for her. I never know what they are exactly... but she knows I have them. I know she does.]

Her emotions turned decidedly towards anger and her hands formed into fists. [I swear, if this is her just playing with me again for some reason I'll never know, I'm not going to forgive her this time.] Juri thought darkly.

===================================================

It was some time later when Juri finally emerged from her room. Her feet were bare, her hair was mostly dry, and she wore a pair of faded blue jeans and a simple button up dress shirt that wasn't tucked in or buttoned at the cuffs or at the first two buttons at her collar.

She looked around the living room, dining, and kitchen areas of their shared dorm appartment (the three areas were really one big, open room, actually). Everything was neat and orderly as usual. Neither her nor Anthy cared for a mess, though Anthy was by far more obsessive about it. There was tea water set to warm. There was Anthy's bedroom door, open by only a crack with no light coming from within. And there was Anthy.

Juri had known where she was in the room immediately, by the sounds. The other girl was sitting on the carpeted floor over by a wall. She was dressed, very cutely to Juri's eyes, in a pair of light blue jean overalls, the legs of which only came to mid thigh. She was wearing the white tee shirt with the dolphin on it and white socks that had a flower pattern on them in the stitching. She was playing some sort (Juri didn't really know what sort) of game with Chu Chu.

Anthy had spoken to him a few times, and Chu Chu had made little animal noises in reply. It really looked like the two understood one another. But Anthy was always like that with her pet. So open and honest with herself. Juri couldn't help the charmed smile that came to her lips at seeing the sight.

But it was a smile that didn't last. Anthy hadn't even looked in her direction when she'd entered the room, though Juri knew Anthy must have noticed it.

So she made up her mind and went over to the stove to check on the hot water. "Would you two like some tea?" She asked, without looking over to them.

"Chu!" Juri smiled at the characteristic squeak Chu Chu made. There was no reply from Anthy though, and Juri looked over to see the other girl looking at her with a question in her eyes.

"We can talk." Juri offered. "While we drink the tea?" She asked with a hopeful smile.

Anthy looked down at the floor a moment, then back up to meet Juri's eyes, a tentative smile now returned. "At the table?" She asked.

"If you like... I can come over to you though, if you want?" Juri didn't mind sitting on the floor. And she didn't mind Chu Chu at all either. She actually kind of liked the little pet animal in fact. She hadn't thought she would, but she did. It had a lot to do with the fact that Chu Chu had liked her first though, and that the fact that he had, had seemed to improve Anthy's estimation and opinion of her by a wide margin.

"Okay..." Anthy said the word softly, bringing her legs up against her as she moved to set her back against the wall and watch Juri as she poured the tea.

Juri took her time, and Anthy kept her eyes fastened on her as she walked over to her. Juri took care not to spill the tea on the tray as she crossed her legs and sat down a couple feet from Anthy. "Mm, here we go." Juri said, setting the tray to the side.

Anthy sat forward and sat with her legs crossed, imitating Juri's position. She accepted the cup of tea her companion offered her and took a small sip to test the temperature while she watched with interest as Juri presented Chu Chu with his cup of tea as well.

"Chu..." Chu Chu said as he went over to the cup, eyes serious, and took a sip. "Chu Chu!" Chu Chu seemed to like the tea, though he obviously considered it a bit on the hot side yet.

"I think he likes the tea." Juri said.

Anthy smiled fondly.

"What did you hear?" Juri asked the uncomfortable question.

Anthy looked down at her cup. "It doesn't really matter, does it?" She said.

"...No, I guess it doesn't." Juri allowed. "Her full name is Utena Tenjou. I met her during lunch yesterday. And we had dinner and went on a walk together last night. We talked."

"And you like her." Anthy said, looking into Juri's eyes.

"And I like her." Juri replied softly, not wanting to lie.

"...I see." Anthy said.

"Is that... A problem for you?" Juri asked, at once knowing she hadn't asked the question right.

"Of course not. You should do as you wish, Miss Juri." Anthy said, not meeting her eyes.

"Anthy..." Juri felt that familiar feeling of helplessness. She could order Anthy to tell her the truth, but then she knew she couldn't really do that. "You deserve to do as you wish too." Was all she could think of to say. She'd thought of the obvious thing when they'd first moved in together of course, and asked Anthy if commanding her to do whatever she wanted to would work. Anthy had said no, that things just... didn't work that way.

Anthy looked up, this time her eyes meeting Juri's. And the smile on her face, it was like the real Anthy showing herself, just for a moment. Like what happened when she was talking with Chu Chu or something, only even a little bit more. "The tea is very good, you know?" Anthy said, looking back down at the tea.

"Thank you." Juri said, a little stunned by what just happened. Anthy had never looked at her like that before. It threw everything Juri was so sure of about her enigmatic dorm mate off kilter once again. She found herself laughing just a little, but it was a kind laugh, the kind that makes you smile when you hear it. Juri brought one of her legs up, bent at the knee, and rested her forearm on her knee, her chin on her forearm. "You have a really nice smile, you know that?" Juri told her, her voice wistful.

Anthy looked up again, a questioning look on her face, and then she smiled, a very cute, endearing, kind of almost lost looking smile. "You as well." Was all she said, getting to her feet. "I think I'd like to go in my room now. If you don't mind?"

"Oh..." Juri's eyes followed her. "No, of course not."

Juri watched as Anthy took her cup of tea and retreated back into her bedroom, the door closing almost soundlessly behind her.

Juri looked down at Chu Chu next, who was still working at his tea. Blowing on it to cool it and then taking another sip. "Ah." Chu Chu said, after taking another drink.

"Like it, huh?" Juri asked.

"Chu?" Chu Chu looked up at her in question.

"So what do you think about that, Chu Chu?" Juri pondered out loud. "Does she really have feelings for me after all?" She asked.

"Chu..." Chu Chu looked like he was seriously contemplating the issue, but also didn't appear to be indicating if he knew either way.

"Hm." Juri laughed a little. "Me either." She said, turning and taking a seat against the wall where Anthy had sat, stretching one leg out before her, the other one raised half way. She looked at Anthy's door.

[What next...] She wondered. She realized then of course, that she'd, at least partly, looked at Anthy as someone... larger than life. Like, just underneath, was something so out of reach. Someone she'd never really know at all. Someone magic. Maybe thinking like that about her, maybe that had been a mistake...

What if Anthy was attracted to her? [She's certainly acting like she is.] She considered Anthy's words and actions this morning and had to admit, that did seem like what could be going on. If that were true, Juri honestly didn't know what she could or should do about it though.

===================================================

The sun shone brightly in the morning sky, and Utena blinked back the light as she looked out on the view in the sky ahead of her.

"You really like her, don't you?" Wakaba asked seriously, walking beside her friend on the way to classes that morning.

"Yeah, I really think I do." Utena smiled over at her friend, happily.

"I saw you walking with her yesterday." Wakaba said. "You looked really happy together...."

"...You did, huh?" Utena asked, regarding her friend seriously for a moment. Wakaba had been unusually quiet this morning, not even commenting about how late Utena had stayed out last night. They shared a dorm room together, and they always seemed to wake up at about the same time. And Utena had today too, despite how late she'd stayed out the pervious day. Wakaba hadn't though, she'd been especially lazy in bed in fact, and not at all her usually talkative self as they did the things they usually did to get ready for the day ahead.

"Wakaba..." Utena ventured. "Is this really weirding you out or something? Juri and me? I know it's a big change, and we've known each other a really long time and..." She kind of trailed off.

Wakaba looked over at her friend, seeing a look of self doubt, so unusual on Utena's face, now evident there. "Oh. Don't worry, Utena, I'm fine... Really." Wakaba assured, trying to muster up a smile.

"Really?" Utena pressed, wanting to make sure it was just her imagination.

"Really." Wakaba said positively. "Okay, maybe it is a little weird for me." She admitted. "And maybe I'm not sure exactly how to talk with you, like we used to... but it'll be okay, Utena. You'll see, you're still my best friend, and that's not going to change. Alright?" Wakaba regarded her, hands holding her school bag behind her back, eyes seeking hers to show the intent behind her words.

"Alright." Utena said, feeling much better about it. "I mean, take as much time as you need. I'm not going anywhere... This is new for me too after all."

"Yeah..." Wakaba said. "I'll bet it is." She looked pensively up at the sky.

Utena regarded her friend questioningly at that last statement. [I wonder what that meant?] Utena pondered as they walked along.

===================================================

A while later, after breakfast was over, Wakaba found herself waving a goodbye to Utena as they parted ways to go to their respective classes. She watched Utena wave back at her and smile as she turned to jog in the direction of the classroom she had to get to (which was all the way across campus and Utena was now running just a bit late for).

There was this kind of painful feeling tugging in her chest, like there was something caught in her throat except there really wasn't. She cast her eyes down and stared at the ground as she walked to her own class. It was a lot closer than Utena's after all, so she didn't have to run like Utena did.

She'd tried to cover with Utena, but as Wakaba walked, she knew she couldn't cover up her feelings very well from herself this time. The truth was, she didn't really know how she felt about what was going on with her friend now.

[Why did she have to change?] Wakaba thought to herself somewhat bitterly. [Why couldn't things just go on like they had been?] But she hated herself for thinking those things. She wasn't really as good a person as people thought she was. Not really. She wanted Utena to always be Utena, the way she was.

[It would be different,] Wakaba thought. [If Utena had fallen for a boy.]

[If Utena found a boy, then all I would have to do would be to find one too, and it wouldn't be a big deal. We'd still go on. Like we did before.]

Wakaba looked up at the sky as she walked. [I mean, what do I even know about this girl? She likes to fight with swords? She has blow up arguments with her roommate who is not really her girlfriend but it's still complicated and Utena won't say how... and Utena likes her more than me.]

She felt crushing despair at that thought. Not just because she was starting to really think it was true, but because she hated herself for thinking that in the first place. [It's not fair!] She cried to herself, her hands balling into fists.

She pounded one against the wall, only lightly, and she leaned there on her closed hand a moment before she pulled her feelings together and walked into class.

One girl gave her a strange look, but other than that, no one really noticed her.

===================================================

Anthy had stayed in her room until Juri had left for her early morning practice session with Miki... Juri hadn't pushed things, she'd just said through the door that she was leaving and wished Anthy a good day...

Inside the room though, Anthy stood leaning her hands on the trellis on the small patio, looking out into the morning sky. Juri had surprised her. She wasn't like anyone else - Juri was one of the special ones, Anthy had known that before they'd even met. But the truth of her own heart was always elusive, where the truth in the hearts of others was always all too clear to her. It hadn't always been that way, she vaguely remembered. But that's the way it was now. And it would be until it wasn't again.

It wasn't always easy, it seemed, being her.

She didn't want to be alone anymore.... But she wasn't alone. She had friends. She had Chu Chu... and she had someone else, too.

And so it was, a short walk to another dorm building on campus later, that Anthy could be found on a particular doorstep knocking on a particular door that she had knocked on precisely two times before.

"Who is it?" She heard a voice from inside call. "I'll be right there."

Anthy didn't answer and the door opened.

"Oh, it's you!" Nanami Kiryuu's face brightened into a delighted and happy smile at the sight of her friend. "Come on in. I'm glad you're here." She said with quiet emotion in her voice.

"Thank you." Anthy said, looking into Nanami's eyes.

"Anthy?" Nanami questioned. "What is it?"

Anthy surprised her by moving forwards and falling into hugging her. "Oh, Nanami." She said softly.

Caught without an idea of what to do for a moment, Nanami none-the-less quickly wrapped her arms gently around the other girl, leaning her head on Anthy's. "Anthy... what's wrong."

"Nothing. I'm just glad you're here." Anthy said, her voice sounding small.

"I'm always here." Nanami said softly. "Come on, lets sit down. We can talk. Or... or we can just sit together. Whatever you want, okay?"

"Okay..." They walked inside, Nanami holding one of Anthy's hands in both of hers. Anthy couldn't help but smile a little as she caught her friend's eyes with her own.

"Can I get you something to drink? Or are you hungry?" Nanami questioned, kneeling on the floor before her friend who she'd sat on the sofa. "I think I still have some things I could fix for you without too much trouble... Noodle soup at least."

"Oh... Well... I guess I did forget to have breakfast this morning.... I did have tea though." Anthy looked down at her hands.

"Alright, I'll... I'll be right back then. You just stay here, okay?"

"Okay." Anthy smiled to her, though her eyes were looking a little lost.

Nanami spent just a small moment simply appreciating that smile, then she went into the kitchen when Anthy looked down and moved to get comfortable, tucking her legs together up under her and scooting to the corner of the sofa.

Nanami worked quickly, getting the water in the pan and following the instructions on the instant noodles package. She'd also remembered she had some bagels and some kind of cream cheese, so she'd need to get those too. Maybe toast the bagels? She tried to keep busy sometimes, living alone like she did, but this was different. Anthy was important.

It had been only twenty days now since she'd come to live at Ohtori Academy. Before that, she'd been at a private boarding school for girls of a certain social status on one of Japan's smaller islands. She'd been there since she was a little girl. She didn't remember much about why she'd been sent there... She still didn't really know in fact. It seemed to her, her parents had simply told her one day that they'd be sending her away to live with other girls her age and that they would come visit her when they could.

Those visits didn't come very often, and after a while, she hardly heard from her mom or dad. It was such a lonely feeling... For a little girl to be told by her parents - if not in so many words, then by the testimony of their actions and non-actions - that she just wasn't wanted by them.

...That first year had been especially hard. Her only lifelines were the letters her brother would send to her, one every week like clockwork, and the kind governess who looked after her and read the letters to her and transcribed replies for her until she could learn to read them and write back completely on her own. Other than that though, she couldn't remember having any friends at the school then. She'd been so painfully shy back then. With no one who was familiar and most of the girls being older. The few that were her age didn't seem to like her for one reason or another.

The years had passed, and she'd gotten better at not being quite so timid. She had learned to always be polite and nice to other people so they would like her, but she also felt cut off and didn't really respond well on the occasions that others tried to make friends with her. They always seemed to want too much from her and she never felt like she had it to give - they wanted her to be like they were, or to go places with them and act more normal or something... they always wanted to change her somehow - and she'd end up snapping at them because of it, and that would be that. Over. One girl last year, her name had been Honami Fujikawa, had hung in there longer than others, and she didn't seem to be much dissuaded when Nanami's temper got the better of her. Nanami had even come to think, that maybe they really could be good friends some day. But then Honami had gone home over the spring break while Nanami had stayed at the school because her parents were, as usual, unavailable to look after her. Nanami never knew what had happened, but Honami changed when she came back. Nanami tried, in a clumsy way, a few times to find out what had happened, but Honami had rebuffed her. The last time, Honami had even slapped her and told her they weren't friends anymore and to just leave her alone. Which Nanami, feeling despairing and even more alone, had done.

She honestly didn't know what she would have done, if it hadn't been for her brother's letters. Maybe killed herself. But, as long as she had those letters, she knew, for at least one person in the world, she genuinely mattered.

She'd been so excited that day, when she'd gotten that last letter from her big brother, telling her he'd made arrangements for her to attend the same school he was at. But the way things were now? Just before Anthy had come to her door, she'd been feeling just as alone and despairing as she had at her old school.

She wasn't even sure she could trust her own brother anymore, or even some of the things she'd been taught were true about how the world around her worked. Up could be down and down could be up now for all she knew anymore. Anthy was her ray of hope.

 And Anthy needed her now.

"Was it Juri?" Nanami asked, coming over to the sofa and sitting beside Anthy with untoasted bagels and cream cheese and orange juice (the noodles would be ready in a few minutes when the timer went off). "Did she do something again?" She asked, her feelings of protectiveness for the one friend she had in the world coming to the fore.

"She's only following her heart..." Anthy said quietly.

That caused Nanami to pause a moment. "Following her heart? What does that... Wait, do you mean she met someone else? Like, met someone, met someone?"

Anthy nodded, taking a sip of her juice. "Her name is Utena. Utena Tenjou." Anthy explained.

[Juri Arisugawa, you're such a complete fool!] Nanami's thoughts rang loudly in her head, full of anger and condemnation. [How could you do this to her?] Her thoughts quieted and she felt sadness welling up inside her for her friend's sake.

"Oh, Anthy..." Nanami wanted to do something, but she felt useless and... she didn't know how to do this. She didn't know the right things to say. Where maters of the heart were concerned, she didn't know anything really. "It'll be alright. Somehow, it will be." Nanami said, not having anything else to say. [I just wish I could believe that it really will be...] Nanami's thoughts grew more lost as she took a bite of her bagel and tried to think of what else she could do or say to help or that that Anthy would want to hear.

[If only I were a real girl... and not made of straw.] Her thoughts mocked, paraphrasing a movie she'd seen once. About a girl who found herself one day in a world she didn't understand.

===================================================

To be continued...

[End notes: There's quite a few stories I'm writing, not all posted online yet; let me know if you like this one and want me to keep updating it. The stories that receive the most feedback are likely to be the ones I update most often.

In addition to positive feedback, constructive criticism, requests for what you'd like to see happen next, or just general comments are all completely welcome.

wishing you all the best,
Jess27]

Chapter 6

Title: Part 6: It\'s A Secret, Knowing When To Stop...

[Author's notes: An important note for those who've followed this story in the past: I've done some updating to Parts 1-5. Parts 1-3 are pretty much the same, just with a few small edits here or there. Part 4 though, is 100% new, so you'll want to go back at least that far to start reading again. Part 5 is about 30% new I think, and Part 6 is also 100% new, as will be part 7 once I write it. Parts 8 and 9 will have content from what was previously Parts 4-5 mixed in with new content.

I made this change because I basically skipped over Juri and Utena's first date when I was first writing this story, and now that I've come back to it, I just couldn't let that stand. I had to go back and tell the story how it needed to be told.]

Part 6 "It's A Secret, Knowing When To Stop..."

===================================================

Utena hurried to meet Juri for their lunch date. She'd already told Wakaba that morning not to expect her to sit with them at lunch today, and her last class was kind of far away from where they were going to meet and she didn't want to be late.

When the spot they were supposed to meet first came into view, she saw Juri was just arriving too and she slowed down a little, then more when she got closer.

"You didn't have to run, you know." Juri told her as she came to a stop in front of her. "I would have waited." She stepped forward and touched Utena's hair a little, their eyes meeting. Utena smiled to her and Juri felt her body react immediately to the very pleasant emotions that stirred in her. Utena seemed to bring out the romantic in her, and really, she was still feeling kind of raw and had some anxiety over the current state of things between her and Anthy; it was weighing on her, she wanted very much to forget about that and let Utena's presence, her touch... heal her.

Utena didn't say anything back at first, mostly because she was busy telling herself it was too soon just to kiss the girl in front of her. "I didn't want to be late." She finally admitted.

Juri's emotions got the better of her restraint then and she moved forward and kissed her date then. Their lips met and Utena was thrilled inside, meeting the kiss eagerly. Their bodies came together and Utena found herself backing Juri up against the wall, their hands freely exploring. Vaguely, Utena heard the sound of a girl gasping and a boy saying 'wow', followed by footsteps. Utena broke off the kiss and looked to see the girl dragging the boy, apparently her boyfriend, away. She laughed and Juri closed her eyes and shook her head just a little. "It doesn't matter." Juri said simply, moving forwards and kissing Utena again, who had to agree with that sentiment.

The kiss was more gentle this time and lasted how long Utena couldn't really tell, she just knew when they parted, she wished it would have lasted longer. They were still close though, Utena's hands on Juri's waist, Juri's hands on Utena's ribs, Juri's back still resting on the wall. "Shouldn't we go eat... at some point?" Juri asked playfully, bringing her hand up and running her fingers through Utena's bangs with clear warmth in her eyes.

Utena smiled. "Yeah, I guess we should shouldn't we?" And she backed up to give Juri some space.

Juri took her hand in hers. "Alright if I pick where we go?" She asked.

"Yeah, of course." Utena said easily. She hadn't really thought through where they'd go for lunch, she realized. Her thoughts had been too occupied with other things apparently. They still were. She was glad Juri had thought of it though. "Where are we going?" She asked curiously.

"Wouldn't you rather it be a surprise?" Juri asked.

"Surprises are good." Utena agreed. "Juri..." She started to say.

"Yes?"

"I just... I wanted to say... I really like kissing you. I mean, you probably already guessed that... I thought I should say it though." She explained a little shyly. And it was true. Kissing Juri was just the best feeling - even when it was over, it was okay, because then she got to look forward to doing it again.

Juri smiled serenely. "I like kissing you too... and I'm glad you said so, it's nice to hear." Juri told her. It was such a simple thing for Utena to have said really, but somehow it was just what Juri needed to hear, she realized. Utena wasn't the first girl she'd been with. Nothing had ever happened with Shiori, the girl who'd been her first love. But since then, she'd kissed other girls. Three, actually. She'd slept with one a number of times, so she wasn't a virgin. But the girl she'd been with, it hadn't exactly been a... healthy relationship, really. She'd never had anther girl who was so open and just... normal with her. It was a really good feeling. "Um, so how did it go, reading your essay in Speech class I mean?" She asked.

"Oh, um, it went really great, I think." Utena replied. "I think Jin's essay was probably better than mine though. He had PowerPoint slides and everything."

Juri laughed playfully. "Well, sometimes coming in 2nd is better than coming in 1st."

"Why do you say that?" Utena asked happily.

"Because it means you have more time to go out on dates with cute girls." She said reasonably.

"I think you have a point about that." Utena replied.

===================================================

A short walk later, Juri and Utena ended up at a food cart that was just a little ways from campus, by a public park. They both got curry dishes with rice and vegetables and then bought cinnamon roles at another cart to have for a dissert.

They carried their food over to a park bench and sat down next to each other to eat. "I've been to this park before a few times." Utena told Juri. "With my friends. It's really nice here. And it's so beautiful out today, isn't it?" The weather really was perfect.

"I know, isn't it? I like being outside more than inside, at least when the weather's nice." Juri agreed.

Utena laughed. "Look at those two!" She said. There was a koi pond in the park and they had a good view of it where they were sitting. Two young children, a brother and a sister maybe, had just run into it at a sprint, a hapless looking man and woman you could assume to be their parents chasing after them and looking very embarrassed.

Juri laughed too. "Did you ever do things like that when you were younger?" She asked Utena as she watched the man wade into the pond after the children who were having a splash fight.

Utena smiled. "Not like that exactly... I did get in trouble sometimes though, mostly because I was always wondering off..."

Juri found that interesting. "And where did you wonder off to then...?" She asked.

Utena watched as the man picked up the boy and carried him over his shoulder out of the pond while the girl rushed back out of the pond and over to the woman who seemed to be trying to avoid getting hugged by the soaking wet little girl. She smiled and shook her head, kind of wishing she had more memories like that of her own childhood. "Into the forest, to a neighbor's house, or, when we were in town, I'd just... go wherever looked interesting. I remember once, I had what seemed like a very long conversation with a baker. She was an older lady, and her children had all grown up and moved away or something, but she could tell really great stories. I even remembered one pretty well, about a bird who went on a long journey... my parents found me after a while, and I remember, they both hugged me and told me they were so happy they'd found me. They were never mad at me, you see. Whenever I did something like that. They just told me not to do it again, but I guess... I never really thought it was important. I guess I thought... it was just some kind of adventure, like in the stories my mom would read to me at bed time."

Juri was smiling softly to her when Utena met her eyes. "I wish I'd known you then." Was all Juri said softly.

Utena smiled too, a little of a bitter-sweet smile. "I wish that too." It had been the first time she'd told anyone about that story from her past, but somehow she knew Juri was the right person to tell it too. She felt like her heart was safe with her. Like, somehow, Juri really understood.

===================================================

Nanami knocked on the door to her brother's room just as a girl with dusky blue hair came down the hallway towards her. "Hello." The girl said as she came up next to her.

"Hello... and you are?" Nanami asked, somehow feeling a little intimidated by this girl. Which was strange, because usually people didn't make her feel that way. Usually she didn't really care what other people did.

"My name is Kozue, I'm Miki's twin sister. You must be Nanami... right?" Kozue asked.

"Miki's sister." Nanami repeated. "My brother told me about you. Somehow, I thought you'd, I don't know, look more alike or something."

Kozue narrowed her eyes a little then laughed softly. "You're cute." Was all she said before Touga came to the door.

"Well, hello. Nanami, it's so wonderful to see you. Kozue, a vision, as always." Touga commented.

"Hello, big brother." Nanami greeted him politely.

Kozue just walked past him inside. "By all means, make yourself at home." Touga chuckled good-naturedly a little at Kozue's actions.

Nanami looked from Kozue's back to her brother's face with a little confusion. There was something between them, she could tell. She couldn't say what, but there was something.

"Nanami." Touga gave her a hug and she, a little stiffly, returned it. She wasn't really comfortable around him anymore. She'd thought she would be when she'd transferred here. After all, he'd been the only one she'd had to count on for so long, or his letters had. She'd assumed it would be a happy reunion and that they'd get along well, like brothers and sisters were supposed to; and at first, it had been like that, or at least it had been nice. But then he'd told her everything and she'd really started to look at him critically for the first time and she just... wasn't comfortable around him as much anymore. "Shall we go join the others? The food should be ready very soon."

Touga was a surprisingly talented chef. For that reason, if not for any other, Nanami was loathe to turn down any invitation from her brother to visit him, as long as it involved a meal. They'd taught her how to cook and such at her old school of course, but she'd never really liked it or been good at it. In her room, all she had were things that were easy to make. She relied on the cafeteria for the rest mostly. Though she did like to go to the park by the school and buy things from the food vendors there sometimes. A lot of the students here did that. Anthy had taken her there the first time and they'd fed birds at the koi pond together.

Touga led her over to the table and set her next to Miki, who greeted her warmly. She liked Miki, he was always nice... even if she never knew quite how to talk to him somehow. Besides her brother's letters, she had practically no experience talking to boys after all. Boys were... a lot different than girls, she was coming to realize. Kozue was standing off to the side, looking out the window. She turned around though soon after Nanami sat down and when the girl's eyes fell upon Nanami it startled her a little the look in those eyes. What had she done to make this girl not like her already?

"So, you just transferred here a few weeks ago, is that right?" Kozue asked her.

"Yes, that's true..." She said, studying the other girl a little and trying to figure out what she was getting at. She knew girls like this, and they rarely let on about their real intentions. You had to be careful when dealing with a girl like that.

"Have you made any friends yet?" She asked mildly.

"...Yes, I have a friend." She said a little defensively. Like this girl might somehow take Anthy away from her if she let her. She'd never had a real friend before, and she was always worried Anthy would turn away from her at some point.

"Just one? That won't do." Kozue said. "A cute girl like you, you should have lots of friends. Right, twin brother?" She asked Miki.

"Well, I guess so. If that's what she wants of course." Miki replied, having just been silently listening up until now.

"Of course that's what you want, isn't it? We should be friends Nanami, wouldn't you like that?" She asked, gazing at her while resting her chin on her hand held up by her elbow on the table.

Nanami felt a little trapped by this. She in fact didn't want to be friends with Miki's sister, but got the distinct impression she didn't want to say no and have Kozue hold a grudge. "...If you want." She said reservedly, trying to act like she wasn't bothered.

"Hmm, okay then." Kozue said.

"Lunch is served." Touga told them, setting down plates of food that looked and smelled completely wonderful.

"Thank you, big brother." Nanami was quick to fill up her plate. She privately thought her brother should just forget about the duels and everything he was wrapped up with and start a restaurant when he graduated or something. Not that Touga would ever consider something like that, she was sure.

Touga laughed a little good-naturedly. "My, what an appetite you have. Didn't they feed you well at that school of yours?" He asked.

"Only bread and water." She joked mildly. "Sometimes lemonade." Having a sense of humor with him still came naturally from their letters. He was the only one she'd ever really shown that side of herself to, besides maybe Honami once or twice.

"Not even jam, or butter?" Touga asked, playing at concern.

"Only if we didn't miss a spot when scrubbing the floors and washing the windows." Nanami told him. "I missed spots all the time though, so... oh well. It wasn't that bad though. They let us go to the bathroom once every day. Twice on Mondays."

Touga tisked. "Shameful, I'll definitely be writing them a strongly worded letter very soon, mark my words." He told her.

"Promises, promises." She said with a soft smile, still not meeting his eyes. [He's still my big brother, somewhere...] She thought to herself.

"Miki, aren't they cute together?" Kozue remarked.

"Very cute." Miki replied, eating another bite of his lunch. "You certainly bring out a different side to your brother, Nanami." He smiled.

"I'm sure I don't know what you could be talking about." Touga replied, giving Nanami a charming smile when she looked up over to him and their eyes met just for a moment before she looked away again.

"So... tell us about yourself, Nanami. What's your real story? Or were you really such a Cinderella girl?" Kozue asked.

Nanami looked up and met Kozue's eyes. "What do you want to know?" She asked.

"Anything you want to say is fine. Like... this friend you have here, who is she? Maybe I know her." She offered.

"Her name is Anthy..." Nanami said. "But I don't think you know her... She likes to keep to herself allot."

"I know who she is, she's Juri Arisugawa's... roommate." Kazue smile a little knowingly at that. "So, I suppose that means... you're into girls too?" She asked.

"...No, I... I mean, I don't know... it's um, it's never come up." She admitted.

"Never come up... so, a virgin then?" She asked.

"...Isn't this a little personal?" Miki put forward when he noticed how uncomfortable the girl next to him was with his sister's line of questioning.

"I don't know... is it Nanami? Is it too personal? We can talk about something else. I was just worried, that's all." She remarked.

"Worried... about what, exactly?" Nanami asked. She knew she was being bated, and it annoyed her, but she wanted to know what Kozue would say anyway.

"It's just... you know, they're lovers, right? Getting between them could turn out bad for you. Of course, if you weren't into girls, I guess that wouldn't be a problem." She explained.

"...They aren't, you know." Nanami said softly, looking away a little.

"Aren't what?" Kozue asked gently.

"Lovers. Anthy and Juri, they aren't lovers." She met Kozue's eyes.

"Of course they aren't." Touga said mildly.

"And you're so sure of it?" Kozue asked.

"Of course I am. Not that Anthy wouldn't like to be, I guess." She said with a kind of subdued bitterness on behalf of her friend. "Juri's a fool not to see it." She said quietly.

"Huh... well, that's a surprise." Kozue said. "I wonder what's wrong with her?"

"What's wrong with who?" Nanami asked.

"Anthy. I mean, Juri's, well, she's kind of a predator where girls are concerned. Not in a bad way, I'm not even into girls and she and I..." Kozue smiled kind of wistfully. "Lets just say, I get why a girl would want to say yes to her." She said, looking at Nanami with a mild fascination that Nanami wasn't quite sure what to make of.

"You mean, you and her... you were together." Nanami restated, wanting to make sure she'd heard that right.

"Mm-hmm. For a couple weeks in fact." She told her mildly.

Nanami shook her head. "I'm not sure I should believe you." She said honestly.

"Well, that's rude. Fine, don't. Or better yet, ask her. She won't deny it." Kozue smiled serenely to her.

Nanami considered that. She'd never actually talked to Juri herself before. Not past just saying a polite hello a couple times. To be honest, she was a little scared to. She knew all Juri would have to do would be to tell Anthy not to be her friend anymore and Anthy would have to do it. And she knew herself well enough to know that the chances of her making a positive impression on the other girl probably wasn't good. Still, Kozue seemed confident about this, so Nanami was inclined to think it was at least partly true. "Did you know about this, big brother?" Nanami asked.

"I did, as a matter of fact." Touga replied. "And it's true, they were a couple... if you want to call it that."

"Can we talk about something else?" Miki asked, a little uncomfortable.

"Whatever for?" Touga asked. "I, for one, am enjoying this particular line of discussion immensely."

"What about you, Miki. You and Juri are friends, right? What do you say?" Nanami asked.

"Well... I can't see Juri as some kind of... predator. But yes, I, um, it wasn't a secret that they were seeing each other then..." He said. "But honestly, I don't know very much about what happened, we don't talk about our... love lives, or anything."

"You don't even have one." Kozue teased him. "You and Nanami have that in common, I guess. Don't you, twin brother? ...It's cute, isn't it Touga? The two of them. Maybe they should be a couple?"

"Stranger things have happened." Touga said mildly. "Not that it would happen like that, I suspect. Fate wouldn't be so kind, would it Kozue, my dear?"

Kozue looked a little embarrassed at that for some reason. And Nanami felt kind of confused and resolved to spend the rest of the meal staying as quiet as she could.

===================================================

"It's this way." Juri said as they walked together down the hallway of her dorm to where her and Anthy lived. She was a little apprehensive about this, about Anthy and Utena meeting, but she didn't want it to seem to Utena like she was hiding something from her, so she'd gotten up her courage and asked her over after classes. Which is when it was now. They'd met at a fountain somewhere else on campus and walked here together.

"You really have this place all to yourselves, huh?" Utena asked, finding it more than a bit odd. Juri had explained it was part of the rules for the duels of course, that the champion duelist and her or his bride would live together during their 'engagement'. (The 'engagement' of it all still not being something Utena had exactly wrapped her head around quite yet. She did want to meet Anthy though, she felt like she needed to somehow.)

"I'm afraid so." Juri confirmed. "It is kind of strange, but the quiet is nice sometimes, I have to admit."

"I bet." Utena said. "Some of the other girls in my dorm can get a bit out of control sometimes... it's fun, but it also kind of makes it hard to study sometimes."

"Well, um, you can always come over here... you know, if you need some quiet." Juri offered a just little awkwardly as they reached the door and she opened it, going in first and closing the door after Utena once she'd entered.

"...I just might take you up on that." Utena smiled to her as they were taking off their shoes, thinking she'd probably have to bring Wakaba along for that if it happened though, just to keep peace. Wakaba was very possessive of her as a study partner after all. Not that Utena usually minded at all of course.

There was the sound of a door opening and Utena turned to see Anthy Himemiya enter from her room. "Oh, Miss Juri, you've brought a guest." Anthy walked over to Utena.

"Anthy..." Juri said, a little surprised by how forward Anthy seemed to be behaving.

"You must be Utena, is that right?" Anthy asked. She was wearing a loose-fit tee-shirt with a pink heart on it and jean-shorts, nothing else. She'd apparently just showered not that long ago.

"Yes. It's, um, it's nice to meet you... Anthy." Utena said. It surprised her a little that this girl had referred to her by her first name when they were only just meeting for the first time. But since she had, Utena figured she should do the same thing.

"Nice to meet you as well, Miss Utena." Anthy replied. "Would you like some tea?" She asked.

Utena looked to Juri who looked a little confused. "Um, sure? I mean, that would... be nice. Thank you."

"What kind would you like?" Anthy asked.

"Darjeeling, um, if you have it." Utena replied.

"Of course. It's one of my favorites, in fact." She said, turning around and walking over towards the kitchen area.

"...What was that about?" Juri spoke, more to herself than to Utena.

Utena watched after her a moment. "She's jealous of me." She said the simple truth, turning to look at Juri who looked decidedly conflicted and unsure of herself.

"...that's what I'm afraid of." Juri replied, looking away and walking over to sit on the sofa.

Utena followed her. "...You didn't tell me Anthy had... that she had feelings for you like that." Utena said, not meeting Juri's eyes.

"I really didn't think that she had... at least... not until this morning anyway." She admitted softly.

Utena took her hand in hers to show support. "Want to talk about it?" She asked.

Juri smiled to her a little weakly. "Only if you do." She said honestly.

Utena looked over at Anthy in the kitchen who was purposefully not looking in their direction apparently. Too far away to overhear if they spoke softly as they were doing. Still though, it seemed kind of rude to do that somehow. "I do... but... this probably isn't the best time. Is it?" She said. "Do you, um, do you think... I should go?" She asked, meeting Juri's eyes again.

"No... or... maybe you should, but... I don't want you to." Juri admitted.

"Okay. I'll... I'll stay then." Utena agreed. [Okay, so I'm obviously going to have to fight this girl for her.] Utena thought to herself. Not fight fight of course, just... compete, for Juri's heart. Because, magic and mystery aside, as apparent as it was to her that Anthy was in love with the girl that she wanted for herself, it was also now apparent to her that Juri returned the feelings, at least in some part. Of course, Juri had been honest about it with her from the start. Or honest enough anyway. It was obvious Juri herself hadn't worked out how she felt about Anthy, so of course she probably couldn't have been much more clear about it than she had been... not that Utena felt that great about finding herself in the middle of this, but it was what it was and she'd just have to deal with it as best as she could and hope Juri would chose her in the end and that they could be together, because that was still very much what she wanted to happen.

Juri smiled. "Maybe I'll regret asking you that..." She considered as she looked over at Anthy who turned and met her gaze unexpectedly. Juri felt a little unsettled and got up, walking over to another part of the room, her arms crossed holding her elbows.

Utena looked after her, then over at Anthy. Her and Anthy's eyes met a moment, then Anthy turned away. Her eyes, the look in them, had been... really kind of mysterious, Utena didn't quite know what to make of it. But... she kind of thought there was something behind it. Sort of... on the tip of her tongue, but out of reach. She kind of wanted to go over and talk to this girl, just under the heading of facing the issue head on and not avoiding it. She decided to go to Juri instead though, because really, what was important to her here was Juri, and she had to be true to that or she wouldn't be the girl who she wanted to be.

"What's wrong?" Utena asked Juri, touching her arm lightly. Their eyes met and Juri smiled just a little to her.

"...she just does this to me sometimes. I'm sorry." Juri told her. "I don't know why I'm acting like this. I shouldn't be." She admitted.

"...you care about her. Allot. Anyone could see that." Utena said softly. "The people we care about, they have the most power over our feelings. Sometimes that's good, and sometimes it's not... and sometimes, I guess... it's probably hard to tell, huh?" She asked.

Juri smiled a little again. "Yeah. Something like that I guess."

Their eyes met and held for a little while and Juri felt better for it, less shaky. Utena felt better too.

"The tea is ready, Miss Utena." Anthy spoke.

Utena turned around and saw Anthy setting out cups of tea on the counter. "I'll take mine to my room... if no one minds?" Anthy asked. Again, not meeting Juri's eyes and seeming like she was addressing Utena instead.

"No Anthy, of course not..." Juri said, feeling bad about it but not knowing what to do. She'd always let Anthy do what she wanted, made a point of doing that. It was funny, actually. Anthy was supposed to be the one going out of her way for Juri, whom Juri was supposed to have in her power, but it had really turned out more the other way around, hadn't it? It was just... such an odd situation.

"Um, have a good night, Miss Himemiya." Utena spoke, not really knowing what else to say. She could have asked Anthy to stay, but honestly she didn't want that. She didn't really like the effect she seemed to have on Juri.

"You as well... Miss Utena." Anthy turned just as she was entering her room and their eyes met a moment before Anthy turned away and closed the door to her room.

"...she hardly ever acknowledged you were there, you noticed that, didn't you?" Utena asked Juri.

"I noticed." Juri said, not retrieving her cup of tea.

Utena got hers though and took a sip. It was good. "So, um, what now?" Utena asked with a little of a helpless smile as she leaned on the counter and regarded Juri a little curiously.

"...we could go in my room for a while, if you want?" Juri offered hopefully.

Utena smiled. "That sounds good." She agreed, taking another sip of tea then setting it down and going with Juri into her room.

Juri took off her uniform jacket and put it on a chair before heading over to her bed and sitting down on it. She had a simple white tank-top on underneath. Utena followed her over and sat down next to her. "May I?" Juri asked, touching one of the buttons on Utena's jacket.

"Um, sure, go ahead." Utena said, her senses suddenly very alert as she just sat there while Juri unbuttoned her jacket and then slid it from her shoulders and sat it aside. She had a sports bra on underneath. She felt a little shy, but also excited about where this could be leading. "Um, we should talk about this... Anthy and everything." Utena said, meeting Juri's eyes.

"...I know." Juri said, getting up on the bed and crawling over to sit against the headboard. Utena followed her and sat cross-legged in front and to the side of her. Their eyes met and Juri smiled just a little to her. "What do you want to know?" Juri asked.

Utena looked down and then up to meet her eyes again. "I can tell you like her, as more than a friend." Utena told her.

"...that's probably true..." Juri admitted. "But... I'd never do anything about it, I couldn't. You have to know that." She told her.

"You mean... because of the duels, because she's the Rose Bride and everything." Utena replied.

"Yes. Of course because of that... it would be just like... like raping her." Juri looked down at the bed.

"...I guess it would, wouldn't it?..." Utena said. This wasn't making her feel any better. "But... if it wasn't for that, if she was just a normal girl... you'd want to be with her?" She asked.

Juri met her eyes, then looked away again. "I don't know." Juri told her honestly. "Maybe. It's impossible to say. I... I don't really... even know that much about her, not really. She just... has this way about her. She gets inside you, you can't stop it. It's... it feels very intimate, between us, but... but I wouldn't say it was love. Not in a normal way at least. Not... I'd give my life to keep her safe, I know I would. But, could I fall in love with her? Having met you..." She looked up and met Utena's eyes. Utena paying wrapped attention to her. "The way we are together, I don't think I could have that with her. I don't think... that I want to." She admitted. And she hadn't realized that really until just now when she said it. That when she really looked at it as it was, in simple terms, she wanted to be with Utena, not with Anthy. It seemed obvious, now that she realized it.

"Oh... so... you..." Utena started to say.

"I want to be with you... I want... I want to be your girlfriend." Juri told her, smiling a little hopefully.

Utena smiled back. "I want that too." She told her. Inside her heart swelled with happiness at hearing that. That Juri seemed to want to be with her as much as she wanted to be with Juri.

Juri, for her part, just felt, well, relieved. Utena had been such a breath of fresh air in her life lately. Just being around her, Juri felt so much better than she had been feeling. It was... it was like... how she imagined things could have been, with Shiori, if they'd shared the same feelings for one another. She felt like... like she'd really found something. Something to hold on to. Like she'd found herself again, or maybe even for the first time. She knew she was still standing on shaky ground, emotionally speaking, but with Utena with her, she felt like she could really handle it. And that was such a great feeling. She got up and moved forwards, touching Utena's cheek. Utena smiled to her, their eyes gazing into one another, and they kissed.

Juri moved forward more and got closer, the kisses got deeper and more serious. Utena met her with equal desire too, and it felt so good, just to feel... accepted, like someone else in the world really got her and thought she was... thought she was as wonderful as Juri thought Utena was. After a little while of just kissing, Juri moved forward more and nudged Utena back, Utena letting her lay her back on the bed on her back. Juri was over her then, their hands exploring one another's bodies as they continued to make out. Juri felt so much heat and warmth just fill her body. Utena's hand came to her breast and Juri closed her eyes at how good it felt. She brought her hand to one of Utena's breasts too and felt it through her clothes. Utena rolled her over onto her back then and Juri was looking up into intese eyes that just took her breath away. Then Utena was kissing her again, one hand in her hair, the other on her left breast. Juri had her left hand on the small of Utena's back, on the bare skin there; her right hand was on Utena's waist, her butt and thigh. She felt like she was becoming lost to this girl and was happy to let that happen.

After a while, Juri rolled them onto their side and then soon had Utena on her back again. She wanted this, wanted to be with her. She started to take Utena's bra off, but Utena jerked a little when she did and pushed her away some.

"Juri..." Utena spoke uncertainly.

"Huh?" Juri said, wondering what was wrong.

"I... this is just... it's going too fast..." She said, feeling a little embarrassed. She wanted to do more, but she just... it felt like it was too soon. Not to mention that Anthy Himemiya was in the room on the other side of the dorm. That aside though, she... wasn't ready for this. Not yet.

"Oh... oh..." Juri backed off and sat up. "I'm... Utena, I'm sorry..." She said, meeting the other girl's eyes.

"No, it's okay... I liked... I really liked what we were doing you know, it's just... can we wait a little while more?" Utena asked. "I just... I need some time, okay?" She asked.

"No, of course you do. Um, this... it would be your first time, wouldn't it?" She asked, already knowing the answer.

"...it's not yours?" Utena asked. She'd thought... she'd though it would be Juri's first time too.

Juri shook her head. "No. I was, there was another girl once. I was with her."

"...who is she?" Utena asked.

Juri considered that. She really didn't want to talk about this. About her first time. But... Utena had a right to ask, she knew that was true. "Her... Kozue. Her name is Kozue. She's... um, you remember Miki?"

Utena nodded yes.

"Kozue is his twin sister." Juri said, meeting Utena's eyes again.

"And you two..." Utena trailed off, feeling a little uncertain about whether she wanted to know this or not.

"We did." Juri said. "I was... we were together for a few weeks last semester."

"Were you um, were you in love with her?" Utena asked.

Juri considered that. "...I thought that maybe that's what it was, but no... I was... mainly I was just feeling confused then. And Kozue... well, she seemed like she knew what she wanted." She told her, still having mixed feelings about her relationship with Miki's sister.

"And... um, how are things between you now?" Utena asked.

"I... um, I still care about her. But, well, I guess you'd... have to know Kozue to know why you've got nothing to worry about where she's concerned. Trust me, she's... well, she's not exactly a very honest person, if you have to know..." Juri told her.

"Oh..." Utena said. "Okay..."

"This... it's not a problem for you, is it?" Juri asked, a little worried.

"Huh? Oh, no, of course not. I guess I just... no, it's not a problem." Utena smiled to her, moving over to kiss her again. "I promise, okay?" She said.

"Okay." Juri said, smiling back. "I..."

"What?" Utena asked.

"Oh, nothing. I guess. I just wish I'd met you a long time ago, that's all." Juri said honestly.

"You said that before." Utena smiled. "I kind of want to kiss you again now." She said.

Juri smiled back. "Go ahead." She said feeling her heart start to beat a little fast again as Utena moved to kiss her again.

They talked some more after that, which involved more making out too, which Utena was very glad of. That she hadn't scared Juri off by wanting to wait or being a virgin or anything.

===================================================

The door closed as Utena left late in the evening and Juri stood there looking at the door a little while, a smile she couldn't shake still on her face. She closed her eyes and shook her head a little. She felt really happy.

She was hungry though, she realized, so she went over to the kitchen to get a snack. She settled for some wheat crackers and veggies with hummus dip. She and Utena had made plans to go on another date in town tomorrow, after classes. She'd kind of wanted to see her at breakfast or lunch too, but she had a student counsel meeting at lunch, and breakfast... it just seemed like maybe they could both use a little time to think after what had happened tonight somehow.

As she was eating, Anthy came out from her room and silently sat down at the table with her. Their eyes met and Juri froze a little inside. Anthy's eyes were mostly as hard to read as ever, but there was a definite cold chill in the air between them that she couldn't ignore. "We can talk... if you want?" Juri offered a little hesitantly.

"...what's there to talk about?" Anthy said softly, taking a piece of celery to eat, though she didn't seem to have much of an appetite.

"...Isn't that obvious?" Juri asked.

"I'm not sure what you could mean, Miss Juri." Anthy said. "If I've done something to displease you...?" She offered.

Juri shook her head in denial a little, eyes momentarily closed. "I think I've done something  to displease you, haven't I?" She asked.

Anthy was silent, she just met Juri's eyes in that usual inscrutable way of hers.

"Anthy..." Juri said, looking down at the table a moment before meeting her roommate's eyes again. "If you have feelings for me, you can tell me so. You... you can tell me anything." She told her.

"...that's very nice of you, Miss Juri." Anthy said simply, seeming to consider what to say next. "I think... that I'll just go to bed now though, if it's all the same to you?" She asked.

"Anthy, I..." Juri closed her eyes and felt a little of a headache coming on. "No, fine, do whatever you want." She waved her off and turned in her chair to look away.

"As you wish, Miss Juri." Anthy said, setting down her half-eaten celery stick and getting up from the table.

Juri felt frustrated and got up. "Anthy..." She started to say.

"Yes, Miss Juri?" Anthy turned around and regarded her from where the kitchen tile bordered the living room carpet.

Juri walked over to her. "I don't like having things be like this between us..." Juri said, feeling a little helpless. "I mean, isn't there something I can say... something that..." her words trialed off as Anthy turned and walked away. Juri followed her. "Anthy, please..."

Before she knew it though, Juri found herself with her back against the wall, her wrists pinned to that wall by Anthy's, Anthy's eyes looking into hers with an intensity that scared her a little. "Please what?" Anthy asked, moving closer to her.

"Anthy..." Juri spoke her name, feeling caught and frozen, unable to really think. The way Anthy was looking at her, looking into her, she felt just... completely helpless.

"Juri... you wanted me to call you that, didn't you? Not 'Miss Juri', only... Juri." Anthy said, coming closer still. "Noble Juri, always protecting me... I could make you so happy. You want me to, you'd never ask, but... I know you want this."

And then Anthy kissed her. Demanding, possessive... and exciting too. It all happened before Juri could even really process what was going on, but when she realized, really realized what Anthy was doing, she shook her head and broke away from the kiss. "Anthy... wh... why are you doing this?" Juri asked, still feeling... scared, somehow.

"Because... it's what you want, isn't it? Otherwise, you'd tell me to stop... but you don't, you never do... why won't you tell me to stop?" She asked, nuzzling her face into Juri's hair, brushing her cheek against hers, lightly kissing her neck, then nipping at her ear a little.

Juri was just... stunned. She'd never have thought Anthy would... would do something like this to her... "...Stop." She said. "Anthy just... just stop." Juri spoke the first command she'd ever given Anthy aloud.

Anthy let her go then and backed up a step. "Whatever you want, Juri." Anthy said.

"...why did you... why Anthy? Why make me..." Juri looked away from Anthy's serene looking eyes and just walked away to her room. She stopped though and turned around to look at Anthy. "Don't come into my room again Anthy, not unless I invite you." She said, then turned and went into her room.

"...I won't... Pleasant dreams..." She barely heard Anthy's reply as she closed the door.

She went over to her bed and lay down on the pillows on her side and started to cry. She couldn't stop, she just cried and wished it hadn't happened... wished Utena had never left. Wished a lot of things, really. Even though she knew very well that wishing things never made a difference.

Mostly though, she wanted to know why. Why Anthy had done that to her. She... she never would have thought Anthy would do something like that... it didn't make any sense to her...

None at all...

===================================================

To be continued...

[End notes: There's quite a few stories I'm writing, not all posted online yet; let me know if you like this one and want me to keep updating it. The stories that receive the most feedback are likely to be the ones I update most often.

In addition to positive feedback, constructive criticism, requests for what you'd like to see happen next, or just general comments are all completely welcome.

wishing you all the best,
Jess27]

Chapter 7

Title: Part 7: Sometimes, Seasons Share One Day...

Part 7 "Sometimes, Seasons Share One Day..."

===================================================

Early the next morning, Juri left her dorm and didn't answer when Anthy had said good morning. She went to the cafeteria and got something to eat. As early as it was, there was hardly anyone else there, the cafeteria was only just opening in fact.

She took her breakfast and left, went over to the fencing hall and let herself in, sitting down on the hardwood floor to eat and wait for Miki to arrive. The time they'd scheduled wasn't for another twenty-five minutes though, so she had time to wait. She'd just... she had to get away from Anthy. She... it was like... she didn't feel all that safe around her anymore. Even though, logically, she knew she could simply tell Anthy not to... do what she'd done... What had she done though? Juri went over it again in her mind and still didn't know. One thing she knew, it had felt like Anthy had just... taken away her control somehow... She felt... very vulnerable right about now.

And the worst thing was... she shivered a little to think of it, but what Anthy had done... it had made her feel.... things she hadn't wanted to feel. Some of those things felt horrible, yes, but not all of it was bad though... that's what made it worse. It was just a few kisses really, that's all, she told herself. She'd stopped Anthy before it had gone any further. But... how far it had gone, that was bad enough. She truly dreaded having to tell Utena what had happened. She felt ashamed she'd let it happen at all, and embarrassed... and worried that... maybe Utena wouldn't forgive her for letting Anthy kiss her like that. Even though, at the time, she'd felt so much like she had in her dream, like she hadn't had a choice... And that this happened just after she'd asked Utena to be her girlfriend, told her she wanted to be with her, not Anthy... It was true, that's what she wanted. What most of her wanted anyway.

Part of her though, part of her had wanted to... just let Anthy keep going... part of her had found it... not exciting exactly, just... like something inside her had needed it to happen. Because... she did love Anthy. She knew she did. It wasn't romantic love, not really, but... she was attracted to her, drawn to her. She'd have to be deeply in denial not to realize that she was. Even if, after what happened last night, after what Anthy had done, she really didn't want that to be true.

She knew not wanting that wouldn't make it not so though, knew that from experience. After Shiori had broken her heart, she'd felt so... so completely wretched and miserable, she would have given almost anything not to feel that way. Not to still love her so much and know at the same time that Shiori just... didn't love her back, apparently didn't even care about her as much as Juri thought she had. To Shiori, she had just been a friend, and not even a good enough friend not to steal a boy from her that Shiori had thought Juri had liked. It had been the complete opposite of true of course. Juri had never thought of Shunya Kuragi as anything more that a friend. What mattered was that Shiori had thought she had though, and betrayed her over it. Not in the way Shiori would have thought she was betraying her, but betrayed her none the less. By being a bad friend. That had hurt more than anything, actually. That Shiori had just... not cared about her, even that much, when Juri would have done... just about anything... anything in the world for her. "...maybe I'm just not a very good judge of character." She said aloud to herself.

Shiori, Kozue... Anthy... none of them had treated her very well at all, she had to accept that. And yet, she was still so foolish as to... to let them hurt her so. Utena was different though. Juri was convinced of that. And thinking all of this through, it made her all the more determined to make it work with her and to ignore whatever her feelings were towards Anthy. Besides, she had no intention of forgiving Anthy for what she'd done. None at all. She'd keep winning the duels for her of course, keep protecting her... but... she didn't think she'd ever be able to bring herself to really trust Anthy again, really feel comfortable around her again. Not like she had in the past. Anthy had violated that trust yesterday... violated her. And Anthy had known exactly what she was doing when she had, Juri was sure of it. That wasn't something Juri felt she could get over very soon. If ever.

But... as long as Utena would forgive her... she closed her eyes and shook her head and decided not to think about the possibility of Utena not forgiving her. Even the idea of that was too painful a specter for her to entertain right now. She decided to just eat her breakfast and try clear her mind in preparation for her fencing practice with Miki. It didn't do to handle a sword when your mind was on other things.

The consequences could be very real and possibly even very deadly if you did.

So she ate her food and made her mind focus on the dance, made herself remember every detail and nuance of her last few matches with Miki. The way they'd moved around and against one another, the way his eyes had told the story.

By the time Miki actually got there, Juri had finished her meal and felt almost as though she'd fought her matches with Miki already.

"Good morning." Miki greeted her.

"Miki, good morning. Ready to get started?" She asked, feeling much better for the comfortable familiarity she felt from the familiar ground she now found herself standing on.

"I am." He replied.

They set about quietly readying themselves for their first practice round. Soon, they were facing off and touching swords. Juri tapped Miki's sword twice, Miki nodded yes that he was ready, and the practice duel began.

Juri kept her awareness focused on her opponent, following his eyes and movements and mostly letting long practiced intuition guide her replies. They started out with just some lighter back and forth as warm up, which gradually got more intense as they both upped the pace a little at a time.

The reality was, Miki was probably as good as her at this if you measured by skill or talent alone, Juri knew that and had told her friend so a number of times. Why she won most of their matches though, was basically down to that Miki just... didn't put his heart into it the way she did. When both duelists had about the same skill, in order to win, Juri knew, you had to put everything you were on the line, hold nothing back, and still have the strength of will to stand your ground and be creative - find... joy. If you could do that, you could transcend skill to something more.

First round - Miki over extended himself, and Juri disarmed him.

Second round - Juri got in close, moved so fast it startled her opponent and he lost his footing and lost the duel.

Third round - Miki was determined not to lose this time and was a more formidable opponent because of it, but Juri just kept pressing him, over and over, one swift attack after another, until Miki couldn't keep up and he lost hold of his sword.

Miki was sweating and he wiped his forehead. He shook his head. "Something's happened with you, hasn't it?" Whatever else was true about Juri when she fought a duel, it was also true that she couldn't hide her emotions during that time.

Juri took Miki's sword and set both hers and his aside, wiping some sweat from her own forehead and turning to meet his regard with an attempt at a smile. "That obvious, is it?" She asked, taking an offered towel from him and unbuttoning her jacket collar.

"When you're that merciless, lets just say... I'd hope it wasn't something I'd done that was the cause." He smiled a little to her.

She regarded him a moment and wanted to confide in him. Somehow though, she couldn't bring herself to say the words. "You're right of course... but... it's nothing I can talk about, if that's what you're offering." She told him, taking off her fencing jacket and setting it on a bench by the rest of their things. "I'm sorry if I was a little rough on you." She apologized, feeling a little guilty for taking out her feelings on him ...it had made her realize something though. She wasn't just hurt, she was... she was very angry with Anthy for what she'd done. Angry in a way she didn't think she'd ever been angry before. It was a... cold feeling, one she felt deeply. She felt trapped by it, and she very much didn't want to feel that way, but she didn't think the feeling would go away that easily either.

"Nothing to do with your date with that girl yesterday, I hope? Utena?" He asked.

Juri felt herself smiling a little. "Nothing to do with her..." She said softly. "She's... she's wonderful."

"...I'm happy for you then." Miki replied simply.

"I just hope I haven't..." Juri shook her head and set her jaw a little. "Listen, I think I'm just going to go grab a shower before classes, alright?"

"Of course." Miki replied.

"Same time tomorrow?" She asked.

"Same time tomorrow." He agreed, thinking he was either a really good friend, or a glutton for punishment.

Juri turned and left then. Miki knew enough to guess at what the problem probably was. That it almost without a doubt had everything to do with Anthy Himemiya. Ever since all of this started, if there was ever something bothering his friend, Anthy was almost certainly at the center of it.

It was troubling, to say the least - he knew from experience something of what kind of an effect Anthy could have on a person when she wanted to, and he didn't envy Juri her position as her... fianc.

===================================================

Her alarm went off, playing lively classical music, and Utena sat up in bed and yawned. She turned the music down a little and then stretched her arms over her head. "Morning." She said, smiling a little to Wakaba who was in the bed next to hers, wiping the sleep from her eyes.

"Mmm. Maybe for you." Wakaba groaned a little and then snuggled back up in bed.

"Aw. What's wrong?" Utena asked, getting up and sitting on the edge of her bed, studying her best friend's grumpy state.

"...I hate mornings." Wakaba replied a little gloomily.

"Since when?" Utena asked. Waking up had never been Wakaba's favorite thing, but she usually was, if not morning's friend, then at least morning's good-natured acquaintance.

"Always. I only hide it well." Wakaba mumbled. "Five more minutes?" She asked.

Utena shrugged. "Okay." She agreed easily. "I'll go make breakfast then." She offered, padding across their dorm room to the kitchen area. They had a good room, with a nice view out over campus. But still, it wasn't fair that Juri and Anthy got a whole building to themselves when she and Wakaba didn't even rate their own rooms, Utena thought as she detoured to the bathroom. If she had her own room, then she could invite Juri over and have more privacy... so they could kiss and everything. She was pretty sure Wakaba wouldn't be alright with her making out with a girlfriend in bed in the same room as her. Utena was sure she wouldn't be all that happy with it either. It would just be weird.

A while later, Utena had started breakfast and Wakaba had gotten out of bed and was sitting on a stool at the counter watching her cook. "I love it when you make strawberry waffles, Utena." Wakaba told her a little dreamily. "It's the best breakfast food ever."

"I know, that's why I made them. I figured you could use some cheering up." Utena told her. Besides, it was a good time to make a special breakfast for her friend. Kaori and Chiaki had a music club meeting that morning, so they wouldn't be able to meet them for breakfast in the cafeteria like they normally would. Kaori played drums in an amateur girl band that had never actually gotten paid to perform anywhere. Chiaki played the flute and was only moderately talented at it, but liked doing it anyway, even though it was clear she'd never play for a symphony or anything when she grew up unless she worked at it a whole lot harder than she was willing to. It's how they'd met, actually. In a music class when they were both nine years old. They hadn't been girlfriends like in a couple until later of course.

"You did, huh?" Wakaba smiled, very much charmed by this, despite her earlier grumpiness. She just had to put it out of her mind, she stubbornly told herself. That was all. If she just ignored it long enough, maybe she'd get used to it.

"Yeah, I'd kind of be a crummy boyfriend if I didn't try to cheer you up when you were grumpy." Utena told her.

Wakaba smiled a little at that but didn't say anything back. Somehow she got the mental image of Utena being a boy then, kissing her. She shook her head and scrunched up her nose at that. It was too weird! Why had she even thought about that?

"Did you get all your homework done?" Wakaba asked, trying to keep the conversation light.

"Huh? Oh, no, I guess I didn't." Utena admitted with a little embarrassment. "I'll have to finish one assignment over lunch, probably." She admitted.

"Well, that stinks." Wakaba commented. "Maybe you shouldn't stay out so late during the week?"

"Yeah... I guess... It's kind of really worth it though." She confessed, a kind of shy love-struck smile coming to her lips.

Wakaba groaned a little internally. She sort of really hated Juri Arisugawa right then. Like in a 'I hope she gets kidnapped by Gypsies' kind of way. Even though she felt guilty for thinking that. "I'm happy for you." Wakaba said. Even though it was mostly a lie.

The rest of their morning routine went by fairly quickly, until, not that much later, the two of them were walking to classes together, and Utena was telling Wakaba about her dates with Juri yesterday.

"Yeah, the park was really nice. After we had lunch, we just walked around for a while, you know? She told me some stories about her family growing up. She has a cousin who's going to school in Paris, isn't that amazing?" Utena asked.

"I guess so." Wakaba replied. It was actually kind of impressive, really. She just kind of wished Juri went to a school in Paris too. "It sounds like you had a good time anyway."

"Yeah... we really did." Utena smiled happily. She wanted to tell Wakaba about her favorite part, when they'd found themselves in a corner of the park with no one else around and they'd kissed for a while under a willow tree and how sweet Juri's smile to her then had been. But she kind of got the feeling Wakaba wouldn't want to hear about that part of it. "Her roommate though..." Utena shook her head, remembering when she'd first really met the girl last night.

"You mean Anthy Himemiya, right?" Wakaba asked, now a little more interested in hearing this.

"Yeah. You wouldn't think it to look at her but... she's actually a little scary. Plus, she definitely likes Juri, and not just as a friend or anything." Utena told her.

"Really." Wakaba's interest was even more piqued. "What happened?"

"Huh? Oh, well... I don't know how much I should say. And I only met her for a little while... but I definitely get the feeling she could be a problem for me." Utena told her honestly.

"What kind of problem?" Wakaba asked.

"It's just... Juri might kind of, like her too... not as much as me, she said. She told me she wanted me and not her, she asked me to be her girlfriend in fact..." Utena said softly. "I don't know, I guess I just don't really like the fact that they live together."

"Well, yeah. I mean... of course you wouldn't like that." Wakaba sympathized, trying to think all of this through. She didn't really know what she should think about all this. She knew she didn't like thinking of Utena with that other girl, with Juri Arisugawa, but... the idea of Utena getting hurt, having her heart broken, that was worse. She couldn't stand thinking about that. [Ohh... it's all a mess!] She thought to herself ruefully.

The rest of the way to class, Wakaba was mainly quiet and let Utena do most of the talking while she tried to think of what she should think about all of this. None of it seemed very fair to her, and she had a hard time not coming back to the fact that she wished Utena had never met that other girl.

That Utena was still just... the same old Utena she always had been.

===================================================

All that morning, Juri had thought about her situation over and over again. She'd been absent-minded during classes, but none of her teachers had bothered her about it. Probably because they were all a little scared of her, since what had happened last year. It had earned her a reputation. Which she was actually a little embarrassed about, but she supposed it did come in handy.

She'd come to the conclusion that she and Anthy needed to talk. That she just needed to be honest with her and not hold her feelings inside. Even if she ended up yelling at her again, which always made her feel worse. She felt like she had to try anyway. Things were never going to be the same between them again, but... she wanted Anthy to give her an explanation. Any explanation. She wanted to hear Anthy tell her to her face why she'd done what she had yesterday.

She felt like... like she might be too... like things might go badly with Utena if she didn't have some kind of closure over this between her and Anthy before she and Utena talked again. When that happened, it would be best for her if she'd be able to tell Utena that she was sure nothing like what had happened would ever happen again. And honestly, right now, she wasn't so sure of that. Not as sure as she felt she needed to be anyway.

When she'd gotten to their dorm room though, Anthy hadn't been there. She'd known Anthy might not be, of course. A lot of the time Anthy went back there to have lunch with Chu Chu or something, but other times she didn't. Juri realized, she really didn't know all that much about what Anthy did when they weren't together. [Does she have friends?] Juri wondered. If she did, Anthy had never let on about it. For all she knew, when she wasn't around, Anthy could be going into the forrest, up to the floating castle, and doing who knew what... the really completely stupid thing of it was though, that even if Anthy was doing that, even if Anthy was playing these games with her on purpose and Anthy were to tell her that to her face, Juri knew she'd still fight for her. Even then. Even if she hated Anthy completely, she'd still fight. She wasn't sure why really... she just knew it was true.

Frustrated, she headed back towards the center of campus. She had a student council meeting soon, much as she wanted to avoid it at the moment. Those meetings were too important though. She needed to stay informed about all of this.

When she arrived, she was the second one there, after Miki, who was waiting at the table by himself. He smiled to her and got up to pull out a chair for her. "Thank you." She said, offering him a little of a smile as she sat down.

"Of course." He said, taking his seat again.

"So, anything on the agenda today?" She asked.

Miki shook his head a little. "I'm pretty sure Touga knows about the girl you're seeing, Utena. That she has one of our rings. That she's the new duelist from the letter."

"And if he knows, I'm sure Saionji does too." Juri pinched the bridge of her nose. [Who knows what that will mean.] She thought to herself. "I'd really hoped they wouldn't find out about that so soon." She told him.

"I'm sure they won't bother her that much over it." Miki said hopefully.

"I wouldn't count on it." Juri replied, one of her hands closing into a fist. She felt a little helpless about this. If Touga got it into his head to play one of his 'games' with someone, there wasn't much Juri could do to stop him besides threaten him at sword point. And Touga would probably only laugh that off, he was so full of himself. Oh, he might promise not to go near Utena to her face, but that would only mean he'd be all the more underhanded about it when he did whatever he wanted to do in the first place.

And Saionji... him, she could deal with better, but she just hated the idea of Utena having to put up with him if he got it into his head to be a jerk to her.

"She's just a duelist, like any of us." Miki reasoned. "You're the current champion. You'd think if they were going to do anything, it would be about you, not her."

"You'd think that." Juri told him. "But the second they figure out she's my girlfriend, they'll both know that they might be able to get to me through her. Touga, especially, would think of something like that. You know it's true."

"You make it sound like... politics or something. He has to know, when it comes to an actual duel, it won't make that much of a difference. If he angers you, in fact, wouldn't that make it worse for him?" He asked,

Juri shook her head. "You should know that's not how a duel really works." She looked him in the eyes. "The duel is won or lost here." Juri indicated their eye contact with her fingers. "Get inside your opponent's head, make them angry enough, or distracted enough, and you've won before the duel even starts. Touga knows that better than just about anyone." Juri told him. "You know he was the reason Kozue got the idea to come on to me in the first place, don't you? What's worse is that it very nearly worked that time. She wasn't a serious challenge, but after that I was so wrecked that Touga very nearly had me. You remember, my hand was in a cast for more than a week after that... a duel is a lot more like politics than you seem to think."

"I... don't think I realized..." Miki said, some things he'd actually been wondering about concerning what had gone on between Juri and his sister now actually making more sense with this new information added. For one thing, during the time she'd worn that cast, she'd been about as sociable as a cat in the rain who'd had had her last three meals in a row stolen away by a nettlesome dog. (In other words, he'd wisely kept his distance.)

It was then that Touga chose to make his entrance, Saionji uncharacteristically by his side. "Two early birds, I see..." Touga spoke as he came up to the table. "Shall we get started?"

"Oh, by all means." Juri replied, already feeling a headache coming on. If those two had been scheming together, heaven help her.

"Very well then... Juri... it seems you've been holding out on us, haven't you?" Touga began.

She pinched the bridge of her nose again. For Touga, that was being positively blunt. He knew about Utena, and he wasn't even going to talk about the weather first before bringing it up, was he? Great. "You act is if I have some obligation to you. You should know very well, that isn't the case." She met his eyes.

"...fair enough, I suppose." He admitted, sitting back in a relaxed pose with his arm resting on the back of his chair. "But, why don't you tell us all about her anyway, since your secret is out in any case? You and this Utena Tenjou seem as thick as thieves in a matter of days. Surely, there's a story there. Or, am I mistaken?"

"I don't suppose telling you to be a gentleman and mind your own business would do any good?" Juri asked, regarding the student council president a wearily.

"Now where would the fun be in that?" Touga gave her one of his most charming smiles. It's affect on many girls would be apparently making them weak in the knees for him. Where she was concerned however, the effect was somewhat more irritating than it was impressive.

"Your definition of 'fun' leaves a lot to be desired." Juri told him pointedly.

"Why play such games. You're obviously having... relations with this Tenjou girl, aren't you?" Saionji accused. "Do you deny it?"

Juri turned an angry gaze on Saionji. "You're obviously an ass, do you deny that?"

"Wretched girl, you dare say such a thing to me?" He stood and knocked his chair onto it's back in the process, returning her hard stare with one of his own.

Juri stared him down, then looked over at Touga. "You know he'd be so much more house broken if you'd just give him a pity fuck once and a while, don't you?" She asked the student council president.

Saionji's face actually turned a few shades red at that. He moved faster than Juri expected and slapped her across the face with the back of his hand. She hadn't seen it coming and almost lost her footing he'd hit her so hard. "You bitch! Take it back what you said, now!" Saionji demanded.

"Saionji, stop this!" Miki demanded, getting up and putting himself between the student council vice president and his friend.

Juri laughed a little. Surprised, but undeterred, she wiped a drop of blood from the corner of her mouth and smiled at him coldly a little. "If you want satisfaction, challenge me to a duel. You know I'll accept." She hoped he would take her up on it actually. She knew he'd make the challenge soon anyway, and she wanted it over with. She also wanted to take her frustrations and anger out on someone, and after he'd spoken of Utena in that sneering tone of voice, and now struck her as well, she wanted that someone to be him.

"You should be careful what you wish for. But fine! Have it your way! Juri Arisugawa, I challenge you. Tomorrow, after classes, at seven." Saionji narrowed his eyes at her.

"I'll be there." Juri told him, walking past him and leaving. She'd had more than enough and had no intention of staying around and suffering through one minute more of those two. She only hoped her face wouldn't bruise up from what Saionji had done. She didn't want her face to look ugly when she met Utena for their date later. She had enough to worry about when in came to that already.

Back at the table, Miki looked between Touga and Saionji. Saionji, Miki noticed, purposefully not looking in Touga's direction. [Could what Juri said about him be true?] He wondered.

"My, and isn't this an interesting turn of events." Touga remarked.

"I'll be in the practice hall. I want no interruptions, I have a duel to prepare for apparently." Saionji announced, walking by without making eye contact with either of them.

Miki looked over at Touga who was smiling as though he'd planned all of this. Which, for all Miki knew, he just might have. He shook his head. "Is all of this really worth it, do you think?" He asked him.

"I do." Touga said, meeting his eyes. "Very much so, in fact." With that, he got up and walked away too, leaving Miki there by himself. He picked up and straightened the chairs and tried to think just what he should do about all of this.

===================================================

After leaving the student council meeting, Juri found the closest girl's bathroom and went in. She was now inspecting her face in the mirror. Her skin was broken just a little at the corner of her mouth, like she'd thought, but it had stopped bleeding. Her skin was a little red around where she'd been struck, but from what she could tell, she didn't think there would be very much bruising. She counted herself lucky. If he hadn't had to reach across the table and had been able to put more of his weight behind his blow, or if the rose crest ring on his finger had hit her wrong, it could have been a lot worse.

It really had been kind of stupid for her to say those things to Saionji like she had. For one thing, she thought what she said was probably true, that that jerk actually did have a crush on his best friend. One he was probably in denial about himself. He'd just... struck a nerve when he'd said what he had about Utena and her having 'relations', which wasn't true... yet (she hoped yet). She'd just wanted to strike back.

Not that she was about to forgive him for hitting her because of it, and she still fully intended to pay him back for that during their duel, but really, she of all people should know that saying something like that, for whatever reason... it was just wrong of her to have done.

She sighed and finished washing the little bit of blood from her face, then went to dry her hands. She'd probably want to put some disinfectant on the wound, so she made up her mind to go back to her dorm. She had no intention of making this school record by going to the medical office.

Besides, she'd decided, she really needed to talk with Anthy. Soon. Maybe she would have returned to their room by now?

On the walk back to their dorm, Juri's thoughts grew more troubled. She realized part of the reason was how... scared she was by this. By Anthy. Not that she felt herself under physical threat from Anthy, not really. It wasn't as though Anthy was going to... rape her or something. Anthy wouldn't go that far, surely, even if she could... or, she wanted to believe that at least. But no, it was more she was scared because she knew how Anthy could affect her very well. She wasn't sure at all that if Anthy really wanted to try in earnest to seduce her, that she'd be able to resist. What had happened yesterday was proof enough that Anthy was in her head even more than she'd previously thought, after all. So, of course she was scared... she still had to talk to her though.

She had to know where things stood between them. There was no other way.

Back at their dorm, Anthy wasn't there. Though she had left Chu Chu by himself, Juri noticed, and the little animal was apparently hungry. That Anthy would be so negligent was a surprise. It made Juri wonder if maybe Anthy could be as troubled by what had happened as she was. Either that or she just didn't care as much as she let on about her pet. Either way, Juri took the time to find some food for him before she went and cleaned the small cut on her face and applied just a little make-up to cover the mild discoloration on her face where Saionji had hit her.

As soon as that was done though, she left to try to find Anthy. Her next class after lunch had already started, she noted from glancing at a clock on her way out, but she'd already decided to skip her next class, and the one after that if she needed to.

She headed to where Anthy had class, figuring Anthy would probably be there. As a student council member, she figured she could pull Anthy out of class without too much trouble. Even if it hadn't been done before, she was fairly sure the teacher wouldn't question her on it.

As it happened though, Anthy wasn't in class when Juri got there. The teacher (rather apprehensively) asked her what she was doing out of class, she ignored the question and left. So if Anthy wasn't in class, where would she go? Juri considered. She decided on the rose garden, knowing Anthy liked to tend the flowers there at times.

When she got there, Anthy wasn't there either though. She spent the rest of that class period searching for her. During class break, she asked around to see if anyone had seen her until finally a girl told her she'd seen Anthy out by the front gates of the school.

Juri thanked her and went straight there. Juri's breath caught a little when she saw her. She was sitting on the side of the hill on the grass, looking out over the town below. Her shoes, socks, and glasses were off and her hair was undone. Her arms were crossed over her knees and her chin was resting on them as she gazed out at the beautiful scene before her. She looked... very beautiful.

"Anthy..." She started to say, sitting down next to her. Anthy didn't reply or even seem to acknowledge that she was there. "We need to talk."

"Whatever about...?" Anthy asked softly, still gazing far off in the distance.

"You know what about, don't you?" Juri asked. "Are you in love with me?" She found herself asking. "No 'Rose Bride' stuff, answer however you want."

"...you know it doesn't work like that." Anthy said softly. "It never has."

"But... what does that even mean?" Juri asked, getting the feeling all of the sudden that there was something going on that she just wasn't getting in all of this.

"...It means..." Anthy said, sitting back and looking over at Juri. "That this..." She reached over with her hand and covered Juri's heart. "Is what commands me." She said softly, bringing her hand up and touching Juri's lips with two of her fingers. "Not this."

"My... heart? But... how can that possibly... I don't understand." Juri told her, feeling kind of helpless.

"No, of course you don't... you haven't wanted to, until now." Anthy told her, resting her chin on her arms again and looking out at the view. "We have a connection, you and I. As long as we're engaged, we always will... I follow the wishes of your heart. If I love you, it's because, in your heart, you want me to love you..."

"I..." Juri closed her eyes as what Anthy had said sunk in. [It's all been... It's all been me?] She thought to herself as she felt tears coming to her eyes. How could it be true? How could Anthy... how was this... it shouldn't be possible, none of this should be possible... "I don't know what to say..."

"...say that you love me. Say you love me the way I love you." Anthy told her. "If you're... worried about Utena Tenjou, you don't have to be. I'll share you with her, if you want. You can have both of us. Wouldn't that be better?" She asked.

Juri opened her eyes wide in shock. "How can you say that?" She asked.

"I love you, I'll say anything... you should know that." She told her with sincerity.

"So... you're just... are you even real?" Juri asked her. "Are you even a real person?"

"Of course I am... why would you ask that, Juri?" Anthy looked over to her and their eyes met and a chill ran through Juri's whole body.

"Because..." She said, looking away out to the view in front of her. "Because if you only... reflect... what's in my heart, how could you be a real person?"

"...at least now you're asking better questions." Anthy sighed, joining her in looking out at the view again.

"So, are you going to answer me?" Juri asked.

"I am a real person... but more than that, I can't really say." Anthy told her.

"Can't, or won't?" Juri asked.

"...Does it matter?" Anthy asked, getting up on her knees and meeting Juri's eyes.

Juri was caught speechless again and Anthy brought her hands to her shoulders and pushed her back so she was laying on the grass. She climbed over her and looked down into her eyes. Juri's mouth hung open a little, but she couldn't speak, couldn't move or resist. Anthy smiled to her. "You love me... I know that you do..." She said softly.

"I... love you..." Juri said back. She couldn't help it, the words just came out.

Anthy bent down and kissed her again, running her hands down Juri's arms and holding her wrists down against the grass as she lowered her body down and straddled the girl under her, continuing to kiss her. "You want this, tell me, Juri... tell me you want me to keep going, to make love to you..." She told her.

Juri blinked, looking into Anthy's eyes. "I... No, I don't, Anthy... I don't..." Juri told her honestly. She still couldn't move, but Anthy didn't kiss her again. She just got up and sat next to her. Juri felt like she could move again and she sat up as well, holding her arms to her chest. She felt... raw inside. Laid bare. She felt tears threaten to fall. "Are you lying to me?" Juri asked her. "Is anything you've told me true?"

Anthy met her gaze, her eyes passive and almost dull. "So what if it is or not? It doesn't matter anyway..." She said. "You should know, the truth never matters as much as people think it does." She told her almost bitterly as she put on her socks and shoes.

Juri was silent as she tried to think about what Anthy had just said. She felt a little like her head was full of buzzing bees or something, and that it was hard to think over the noise they made.

"It matters to me." She finally said as Anthy finished tying her shoes.

"What does?" Anthy asked.

"The truth."

"Then ask me, Miss Juri." She told her.

"Are you a real person, or just some kind of... trick?" She asked.

Anthy moved over and kissed her forehead. "You shouldn't ask questions you already know the answers to." She said, getting up and walking away.

Juri turned away and didn't watch her go. She felt like crying again, but was stubbornly holding herself back from doing so. "I've cried enough over her." She told herself quietly.

Anthy had told her that she already knew the answer to her question. So fine, if she was to believe that, all she had to do was figure out what it was she knew. She tried to look at it as if it were someone else's problem and she had nothing to do with it. She looked out at the clear blue sky a while and just let herself think, let her mind work. "It's a lie... it has to be." She finally said softly to herself.

Anthy couldn't just be some kind of magic trick that did whatever her heart wanted her to. It didn't make any sense, so it had to be a lie. Or, at least it had to be partly a lie. Anthy could... it was pretty obvious at this point that Anthy could see her heart, or something like that. And that she could do things with what she knew. Was it that, was that how Anthy could hold her at her mercy so easily? Or was it some kind of magic? Or... maybe some combination of the two? One thing she knew was that her head was starting to hurt over thinking about this and she still didn't feel all that much better about anything for having confronted Anthy. If anything, she might have just made it worse. No, she definitely had. Now she had two... incidents... that she needed to confess to Utena, not only one.

She felt a definite sense of dread closing in over her. It was almost suffocating.

It was then that a thought crossed her mind. [What if I lose?] She thought. [What if I just... let him win her from me?] ...maybe not Saionji, but Touga? They'd... they'd probably deserve each other, she thought bitterly.

===================================================

[What if I lose?] Anthy heard the thought and it hit her hard. She couldn't hear everything that Juri thought, just some things, things that were about her mostly, but that was more than enough, wasn't it? "Why does it hurt so much, Chu Chu? To fall in love?" She asked her friend. She was laying on her side on the carpet in the living area of her and Juri's dorm and Chu Chu had come over to comfort her because he'd sensed her distress.

Chu Chu replied that he didn't know, that he'd never been in love before. But that if it made her feel bad, maybe she could just do something else for a while?

Anthy smiled. That was one reason she liked animals so much, that they didn't let their woes get them down, or that if they did, they usually didn't hold on to the hurt for very long. They tended to just live their life and find joy wherever they could because most of them didn't know another way to live. Human beings knew other ways though. Far too many in her opinion.

"That's just it Chu Chu, when you love someone, doing something else doesn't help. No matter what you do, you still love them. All the time." She told him.

Chu Chu replied that love sounded like what had happened to him when he was little, when he'd been taken away from his mother and put in a small place he couldn't escape from. Until Anthy had saved him. Maybe you just need someone else to help you like that? He suggested.

"...I'm sorry I forgot to feed you today." Anthy said.

Chu Chu told her that it was alright.

She had realized her mistake on her way here. But when she'd gotten home, she'd found that Chu Chu had already been fed, he'd told her that Juri had done it, and that had just made her feel all the worse for how she'd treated her before.

"I just can't seem to help acting that way towards her lately." She said. "I know I shouldn't, but... it makes me so crazy, thinking of her with that other girl. I want to hate her, hate both of them, but I can't... so I hurt her."

She got up and crossed her legs, looking over at the food Juri had left out for her friend. "It's her own fault, Chu Chu. It's all her fault. All of it." She said. Though she didn't really believe that either.

She felt scared though, she realized. How long had it been since she'd felt that way about anything? But it was true. She was scared. Because she thought Juri might actually do it. Lose on purpose. And then she'd lose her. Lose so much. It wouldn't even hurt, she knew, but sometimes... that could be the worst thing in the world. Not to be able to hurt when you remembered what it felt like.

She wondered, if Juri knew what that was like, would it make a difference to her? Would she stay? Would she keep fighting for her?

===================================================

It was after classes now. Juri had ended up skipping all her classes that afternoon. It was something she normally would not have done, but she made a practice of keeping her grades near perfect to appease her parents, so one indiscretion wasn't likely to affect her academically very much on the whole.

She'd ended up just walking around campus or sitting by herself for the rest of the time trying to get her thoughts and feelings into some kind of stable order. Trying to figure out what, exactly, she was going to say to Utena also. She knew she had to tell her the truth, but how to phrase it so there wasn't a disastrous misunderstanding was another matter. It wasn't exactly an indelicate matter, how to tell your girlfriend that you let another girl kiss you twice but that the other girl in question had somehow frozen you in place so you hadn't been able to stop her... if that was even the truth of what happened. What if it was true what Anthy had said, that she'd only been able to kiss her like that because her own heart had secretly wanted it to happen? She couldn't discount the possibility, not really... no matter how badly she wanted to do just that.

Now she was meeting Utena at a fountain they both liked. As the fountain came into view, she saw Utena with the water behind her and the sunlight playing around her and she was struck kind of speechless by how beautiful she was. She smiled a little and sighed, walking forward to meet her. As she was half way over to her, Utena turned and saw her then smiled. Juri couldn't help smile back and feel a lot better for it, despite the burden that she felt over what she knew she had to confess.

She kept walking and Utena met her half way, moving in close and kissing her as though it were completely natural, unafraid of the reactions of the others students around them. Juri kissed her back gratefully. The feeling was just amazing, being this close, touching her, she wanted to do this with her every day, several times every day if she had her choice. She said a silent prayer that Utena would give her the chance.

"Hi, you." Utena spoke, her lips still just a breath away.

"Hi." Juri smiled softly to her, very much charmed by her.

"I've wanted to kiss you like that all day." Utena said back just as softly while looking into Juri's eyes.

Juri swallowed and backed up, looking away a moment and then meeting Utena's curious eyes. "What's the matter?" Utena asked.

"I have to tell you something... and I really wish I didn't." She confessed.

"Okay... whatever it is, you can tell me." Utena tried to reassure her.

Juri closed her eyes a moment then opened them and met Utena's concerned gaze again. "Can we... go sit down by the fountain maybe?" She asked hopefully.

"Yeah, of course we can." Utena agreed easily, trying to figure out what this could be about.

They went over and sat down, neither saying anything until they were seated and their gazes met again. "I... Anthy, she... um, she... kissed me." Juri admitted.

Utena didn't say anything, but Juri could see her eyes become more guarded.

"I... I didn't want her to, and I told her to stop, but... I don't know, she can just do something to me... where I can't move, it's like... like I'm in a dream or something, except I'm not." She looked into Utena's eyes, hoping for understanding.

Utena looked away, down at her hands a moment. "I think you better tell me everything, from the beginning. Okay?" She asked, meeting Juri's eyes again. She didn't like where this was going, not at all, but she could see Juri was hurting from this and that she needed her to be there for her, and that was the most important thing, not whatever hurt she herself felt from this.

Juri nodded her agreeance and began to tell her story. "It was... after you left last night. Anthy came out of her room while I was having a snack before bed. She was... kind of cold to me, and I confronted her about it some, but she just got up and left, so I went after her and asked her again to talk to me. She... pinned me against the wall... and kissed me. I just... let her, I felt like I couldn't move, or do anything... she said she would keep going, unless I told her to stop. So I did, and she stopped. It was... the first time I've ever done that, told her to do something. Then I told her to stay out of my room, and I went to bed and... cried myself to sleep." She told her honestly, feeling embarrassed and ashamed.

She met Utena's eyes again and couldn't read the look in them very well.

"And, um, that's everything?" Utena asked, more than a little apprehensive to hear any more. Then she noticed something. "Juri, your face, what happened?" She asked, touching her cheek.

Juri shook her head. "In the morning I left without talking to her and I went to fencing practice with Miki. While I practiced against him, I realized how... how angry I was at her, at Anthy. Then during lunch, I had that council meeting, and Saionji was... he said something about us, you and me, that we were having 'relations', and he said it like it was filthy or something, and I said something back, something awful and vicious, and he slapped me, hard, and challenged me to a duel." Juri saw definite anger on her behalf in Utena's eyes at that. "But after that, I knew I had to find Anthy, to... get some answers. About why she did... what she did. It, um, it took a while, but I found her out by the front gates of the school. We talked... I wouldn't really call it a conversation. She told me a lot of things, I'm not sure if any of it's true, really, but she... did the same thing to me again, only worse, harder to fight back against. She... pinned me to the ground, got on top of me, told me to tell her I loved her, and kissed me... She told me to let her make love to me, but I said no." By this point she was crying and wiping the tears from her eyes. She met Utena's eyes and felt just so shaky. This wasn't going like she'd hoped it would, not at all. "I'm so sorry Utena, I'd give... I didn't want her to do what she did to me, I hate her, I want to be with you, I swear I do..." She trailed off, not looking into Utena's eyes and feeling like she'd just... ran out of words.

"It's... it's okay." Utena finally said, touching her hand. There was no way Juri was lying to her, Utena could tell that without a doubt. As crazy as it seemed, what Juri was describing must have actually happened to her. It must be a part of the magic of all of this, about Anthy's curse or whatever it was. Which meant, that things were even more dangerous for them than she might have first thought.

Juri looked up in surprise and met her eyes. "It... you can't mean that." She told her.

"I'm not happy about it, and I kind of want to punch your roommate's lights out, if I'm honest... and I... I still have a lot of questions about all of this. But... you were honest about it, and you want to be with me, not her. That's what's important to me." She told her. "That is, um, that is what you want, right?" She asked hopefully, feeling a little insecure over this.

"I swear." Juri told her.

"Then it's okay." She said, moving in and kissing her. Juri met the kiss and felt a little giddy inside, and scared, like she was going a little crazy maybe. But she held on to Utena and kissed her back and was just grateful that Utena hadn't broken her heart. She wasn't at all sure she'd have been able to take that right now... They kissed for a while and when the kiss broke, Utena smiled to her, a sweet, innocent kind of almost shy smile. "Juri..."

"...Yes?" Juri asked, wondering what her girlfriend would say.

Utena closed her eyes and shook her head a little. "Nothing." She smiled and gave Juri another brief kiss. "Let's just get going, okay? We can talk some more while we walk into town?"

"I... of course. That sounds good." Juri deferred a little awkwardly, not quite meeting Utena's eyes a moment then finding her courage and meeting her gaze again. "Let's go." She smiled, deciding to just trust the other girl and hope that things would work out for the best for once. Despite her obviously very poor track record.

Juri and Utena got up and Utena held her hand out, Juri took it in hers and felt reassured by the simple and familiar intimacy Utena had offered. She smiled a little wistfully as they started to go, then looked up into the sky. [Angels dance on the head of a pin...] She thought to herself. Her mother had said that to her once, that she envied their grace to do such a thing. Today, Juri thought, she understood more why her mother had said that.

While they walked into town, they talked more about what had happened between her and Anthy. She explained the things Anthy had said to her about... the nature of their relationship and what Anthy being the Rose Bride might really mean, and about both Utena and her feelings about it, and by the time they were seated at the restaurant, they were both in a better place over the whole thing. Even so though, there were still a lot of unanswered questions they both had about all of it.

The Twin Tigers was a traditional restaurant with a good reputation. It had good food, the prices were a little high but fair, but it was mainly known as a place to take your girlfriend or boyfriend on a romantic date.

They were sat down at their table, sitting on the cushions on the floor at the low-built table. The waitress assured them someone would be out with tea shortly. "It's a serious problem though..." Utena said, having thought about this.

"What is?" Juri asked.

"Well, I mean if she can just do that to you... what else could she do? What do we really know about her after all? She could be really dangerous for all we know." Utena told her. She didn't like the idea of it at all, and she was worried for Juri in all of this. "...what if next time, she doesn't stop when you ask her to?" She said in a soft yet grave tone of voice.

"You mean... what if she rapes me?" Juri asked the question. The idea had occurred to her too when she'd been walking by herself, but she hadn't really wanted to think about it.

"...yeah." Utena said a little hesitantly, looking down at the place setting in front of her a moment.

"I... I don't know. I... I want to think she wouldn't do something like that, but then, I'd never have though she would have done the things she's already done... You're right though; even though it seems like I've known her for such a long time, the truth is, I don't actually know very much about her... not really..." Juri admitted.

"So... what can we do?" Utena asked, because she was having a hard time coming up with an answer. When Juri had told her everything about the forbidden forest and the upside-down castle and all of it two days ago, she'd thought it was all... this amazing mystery. She wanted to find out everything. She wanted to find a way to go to the castle. She thought, if she did, maybe she could find the prince who'd helped her years ago. She thought: Maybe he needs my help? Maybe I can help him like he helped me? Now though... she was realizing that none of it would be as easy as that.

"...I can lose on purpose." Juri said, feeling ashamed for saying it. She'd honestly never thought she would say something like this out loud, she was even a little worried Utena would think badly of her for wanting to basically abandoned Anthy. For herself, she didn't really know how she felt about it at this point. She just knew... she really didn't want to see Anthy, ever again if she could help it.

Utena looked at Juri in surprise. "You'd really do that?" She asked. If she was honest with herself, that's exactly what she wanted Juri to do.

"...I don't know. At this point, I can't think of what else I can do." Juri confessed, meeting Utena's eyes. "I'm... I'm scared of her. It feels like she's just going to keep doing this to me until I... have a break down or something." She admitted shamefully. Because she was distressingly sure that that's exactly what would happen if something didn't change for her soon. Oh, logically speaking, all Anthy had done amounted to not that much more than kissing her a few times. That's not what it felt like though, not at all...

"Oh..." Utena said. "It's really that bad?" She asked. She'd known it was bad, but maybe she hadn't known it was as bad as it really was.

"I think it might be... it's better when I'm with you. But, when I'm alone with her..." She shook her head.

"...maybe I should move in with you then?" She asked.

Juri looked up in surprise and met her eyes, smiling just a little. "That's forward." She said.

"I... uh... yeah, I guess it is." Utena admitted, blushing just a little as the waitress came by and served them their tea.

After they thanked her and told her their orders and she left, Juri took a sip of tea and said. "...I accept."

Utena set down her tea before taking the experimental sip she'd intended on. "Really?" She asked.

"Yes, really." Juri told her. "I have to try something, and your idea..." She smiled. "I like your idea very much." She felt amazingly relieved too. Because otherwise, at this point, she couldn't be sure whether or not she would have lost to Saionji on purpose if she'd been faced with the choice. Even knowing how badly it could turn out for Anthy... the truth was, how Anthy had hurt her, nothing in her life had hurt as badly, or made her doubt herself so much.

Utena smiled, a little unsure of herself. She hadn't thought it through at all when she'd said it, now she was nervous over it. Did Juri think that meant that she wanted to go all the way with her? That she was ready for that now? Because she still wasn't sure if she was. This whole business with Anthy made her even less sure in fact. "Good..." She said. "Because um, even though she did something... really kind of awful to you, I guess, we... we don't actually know she was out to hurt you or do anything bad, right?" She'd thought about this and realized it was true, no matter how much she kind of wanted to hate this girl on principle. "I mean... maybe she really is just... in love with you, Juri. Maybe that's all this is, and she's all messed up over it too..." She offered. "I mean, it's true that it's a really bad way to express your feelings, but maybe she just didn't know a healthier way to do it. It... it would be cruel to hurt her like that if that was true, wouldn't it?"

"Yeah... I guess so..." Juri allowed, though at this point she had a hard time seeing it that way herself. It did impress her greatly that Utena saw it that way though. She really was a good person, more so that Juri might have believed possible. "We can try it at least. I just... you know, she told me she'd be okay with sharing me with you?" She said honestly. "Obviously, that's not going to happen. I'm only saying, this might be hard on you..."

Utena closed her eyes. "It's fine." She said, though it really wasn't all that fine. The truth was though, even though she hadn't told this to Juri yet... she was in love. And there wasn't a lot she wouldn't go through to keep Juri as her girlfriend. She'd known she would have to deal with Anthy Himemiya from the start to have what she wanted, have who she wanted, she just hadn't known how crazy it would all turn out to be. Still, she wasn't about to quit and let Anthy win. Juri hadn't been kidding when she'd told her it was 'complicated' apparently. "I'll just have to deal with it, that's all."

Juri regarded her with concern. She kind of wanted to ask why. Why Utena thought she was worth going to such lengths over. But she was selfish enough not to. She wanted to keep Utena as her girlfriend, so saying something like that that might make her reconsider was just something she wasn't willing to risk right now. If she were a better person, maybe she'd just tell Utena to go or something, and not involve her in this any further. But that was also something she just wasn't willing to do. "Utena...? I um, I'm really sorry for all of this."

"Yeah... you said that before." Utena smiled a little. Juri was actually kind of cute like this, acting contrite and everything. Of course, she had yet to see Juri look anywhere near unattractive to her, in any mood.

"Sorry." Juri looked embarrassed.

"It's okay." Utena said, looking down at her tea and deciding to take a sip.

Juri watched her, there was obviously something on her mind. "Is there something you want to say to me?" She asked impulsively. "I wouldn't blame you if you yelled at me or something, I kind of deserve it probably."

"Huh? Oh, no. It's nothing like that. Sorry... it's just, can we talk about something else for a while?" Utena asked hopefully. "This is supposed to be a date after all, right?" She smiled a little.

Juri looked embarrassed at that. "...you're right, of course." She admitted. "I guess it's been a pretty bad one so far, hasn't it?" She was a little pained admitting that. And felt more than a little guilty over it. "What should we talk about?"

"I don't know, anything." Utena was starting to feel better now that the previous topic was over. She wasn't looking forward to telling Wakaba she was moving out of course, or to trying to work all of this mess out between her, Juri, and Anthy. But she wanted to have a fun date with Juri now at least. She wanted just to... spend more time with her. "Tell me something about you, anything you want. Like, a happy memory?" She asked.

Juri smiled. "I can do that." She ran a hand through her hair and thought of what to say. "On my thirteenth birthday, I remember, my parents were away and I was staying in Marseille with my cousin Ayaka and my aunt and uncle. Ayaka was fifteen then; 'just old enough to get into trouble', my uncle said." Juri smiled, pleased and relieved to be talking about happier things. "He was right of course. He was called away on business that day, and my aunt was ill with a flu she'd contracted in India the previous week and being taken care of by the household's staff. She didn't want either of us visiting her for fear we'd catch what she had. My uncle explicitly told us not to leave the house grounds and that he'd be back later in the evening, that he'd make it up to me and we'd do something nice for my birthday. Of course, neither Ayaka or I believed him. He and my father both had that in common, they work and their family comes second. So Ayaka said we were going to go out into town by ourselves and we were going to have fun on my birthday."

Utena laughed, already charmed by this story. "I hope I get to meet this cousin of yours one day, it sounds like I would like her." She said.

"I'm sure she'd like you too." Juri said. "Anyway, we ended up in le Cours Julien with a couple of her friends. It wasn't a dangerous place to go or anything, just very trendy, it made us feel like we were older than we were to go there. They had bookstores, cafs, fountains, that kind of thing. We pretended we were grown-up tourists all afternoon until we got tired and went home when it looked like it might get dark soon." She told her. "At one point, we were in this book store, pretending to browse the isles and look at the books, talking to each other like we knew what all the books meant and probably making no sense at all to anyone who heard us talking. It only lasted until Cecily, one of Ayaka's local friends, got board and took Ayaka's book and ran down the isle. We ended up causing sort of a commotion in the end and the owner, an old man with white hair, told us we had to leave. He had this kind of rueful smile on his face, like he could remember, maybe just barely, what it had been like to be our age. He wasn't upset with us, he just told us to go find our parents and to try to behave a little better next time."

They talked like that and traded stories for the rest of the meal, staying late at the restaurant and ordering dissert, taking their time.

===================================================

After they left the restaurant, it was still light out and Juri suggested they walk around town together for a while.

"I honestly don't know what I'll want to do." Utena admitted with just a little embarrassment. Juri had asked what she was planning to do with her life after she graduated, and Utena really didn't think she had an answer to that. Not a good one, anyway. "I kind of want to travel to other countries, if I can. Like, I'd like to see France like you described it in your story, that would be great." She said.

Juri wanted to tell her 'I could take you to France', but she thought that was too forward at this point, like saying she expected them to be together that long. She did want that, but she knew from experience that things changed, people changed. Or maybe they didn't, not really. In any case, she didn't say that. "Where else would you go?"

"I don't know, anywhere I guess." Utena said, looking up into the sky. "It's not really so important to me, what I do for a living. My aunt and uncle are both anthropologists, so they travel a lot. When I was younger, after my parents died, they moved here, into my and parents house. My uncle took a job at a museum and my aunt took a sabbatical, though she did do a few lectures here and there. They're back to traveling now. They're in South America. Sometimes I think I might want to do what they do." She admitted.

"I could see that." Juri told her. Thinking she'd be only too happy to pick up and go and leave everyone else behind to go with Utena on an expedition to a far off land... if Utena asked her to of course. She didn't tell Utena she was thinking that either though. It was kind of depressing to her how hung up she was being over this though, she didn't want to be clingy or pathetic as a girlfriend, she really didn't want that. So, despite that that's kind of how she was feeling inside at the time, she was determined not to let on to Utena that she was having those sorts of feelings. She didn't want Utena to think she was... desperate, or something. Even though maybe she was just now.

"My parents..." Utena said. "My mother was a school teacher, and my father owned a lot of property, inherited from his family. After they died, my aunt and uncle sold all of it besides the house I grew up in and put all the money they made from the sale into a trust for me. It will belong to me when I turn eighteen, I guess. Part of me wants to move back into that house after I finish with school, part of me doesn't because I think it would be too sad though." She confessed. "But... if I did move back there, I still don't know what I'd want to, you know, do with my life."

"Well... it's not like you have to decide today or anything." Juri told her, squeezing her hand a little in support.

"No, you're right. Have you decided?" Utena asked. "What you're going to do with your life?"

Juri shook her head. "My father probably still assumes that I'll find a husband and merry well." She told her in mild disbelief that it was probably true.

"Well, that doesn't seem like it's going to happen, does it?" Utena laughed a little, stopping and kissing her lightly on the lips to as if to prove the point.

Juri smiled,

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