Story: The Kind of Girl I Go For (all chapters)

Authors: Jessica Knight

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Chapter 1

"So that's the kind of boy you go for, is it?" Sae asked, her eyes alight with something other than just friendly curiosity. They were in the hallway of their high school in between classes and Sae had caught Momo looking at a boy earlier and was now on the trail of dirt.

"Who, Touji?" Momo replied, looking over at the boy in question with an unsure expression on her face. "No, I don't feel that way about Touji. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's a really nice guy!" Momo was fast to correct, thinking maybe she'd given the wrong impression. "I just..."

"There's someone else you're interested in?" Sae asked, with something approaching friendly interest. Though the level of curiosity evident spoke otherwise.

"Um, well, yeah. There is..." Momo looked down, avoiding eye contact.

"Well, who is he? You've got to tell me. You know I'll find out anyway if you don't." Her friend warned, and Momo knew that Sae wouldn't easily give up if she thought something like this was being hidden from her.

Momo went over and leaned against a windowsill, looking thoughtful a moment. "Alright. Um, but just, not now, o'kay?" Momo looked at her friend with pleading eyes. "Just wait a little while, and I'll tell you. I promise I will." She said.

"Mm..." Sae considered her friend. "This is really serious, isn't it?" She asked.

Momo felt her face warm a little and was sure she was blushing some, glad that her darker skin at least had the benefit of hiding it a little when she blushed. "Yeah, I guess... I guess it really is." She admitted.

"When are you going to tell me?" Sae whined a little and did her best to look the part.

"Well I um, that is..." Momo tried to think.

"Come on Momo, I'm your best friend." Sae persisted, taking one of Momo's hands in both of hers and holding it to her chest. "If you can't tell me, who can you tell? Right?" She pressed the point with her eyes.

Momo's mouth fell open just a little, caught in her friend's eyes. "I um, uh, yeah... I'll tell you..." She felt her cheeks flare with warmth and all the nerve endings in her hand heat and send such good feelings through her from Sae's hands over hers like that. "You, um... are you still going to come over to my house this weekend?" She asked very shyly.

Sae nodded. "Of course I am, Momo." She said.

"Then I'll tell you then." Momo said, a shy smile coming to her lips.

Sae got a triumphant look in her eyes and moved in closer to Momo, her face now mere inches away. "I'll hold you to that." She said lowly.

Momo gulped. [Is she going to kiss me?] Her mind stupidly asked.

"Well, now that that's settled, we have to get to classes, don't we." Sae backed away and clasped her hands behind her back, leaning forward at the waist a little and smiling. "Come on, we're meeting out by the pool today." She spoke. "I want to see you beat everybody again. It's so funny to see the other girls give you those death looks behind your back." She laughed.

"They really do that?" Momo asked, letting Sae tug her by the hand away from the window and falling into step besides the other girl. Momo fleetingly wished Sae had kept possession of her hand, even though she knew it would look strange and she'd be embarrassed by it. She and Sae already got a few strange looks every now and then, and Momo hated to think of what those looks might mean people thought about her, or about Sae. She also hated to think that people gave her dirty looks because she was so good at swimming though. Why did people have to do that?

"Uh huh, it's really sad too. Bitter people. I tell you." Sae joked. "Boys like that sort of thing though, you know. You should bring this boy you like to a swimming meet. I bet he'd just die." Sae further poked at her friend's mysterious crush.

"Sae..." Momo's eyes fell, feeling more embarrassed. "Do you have to say things like that to me?" She pleaded.

"Come on Momo, you know it's true." She further pandered to her friend's ego. "Any guy would be so totally lucky to have you."

Momo looked over at Sae as they walked. "You think so?" She asked.

Sae met Momo's eyes. "I know so!" She said. Her mind already stewing over what she'd do when she found out who this boy was.

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That night Momo Adachi lay on her side in bed, a framed picture of her and Sae at the park in her hands and the clothes she'd worn out to the shopping district that afternoon still on her. She closed her eyes and sighed softly, remembering the look on Sae's face, in her dancing eyes, when her friend had pulled her along by the hand into a jewelry shop to browse for things that were mostly too expensive for them to buy (although there were some things there meant to pander to teenage girls on a budget like the two of them). A warm feeling spread through Momo's body in remembering.

She hadn't had an easy time of it in her life, especially in school. Ever sense she was little, you see, she'd loved swimming and would take part in it when ever she could. She'd joined the swim team the first chance she'd gotten, and that meant she felt like she had to practice all the more to be the best she could. Add to that all the time she spent out doors, because she was not an indoor sort of person by any means, and you got a very noticeably tan person. Add to that her reddish blonde hair, courtesy of the chlorine in the pools she swam in, and to look at her, she seemed to fit the bill for one of those girls who went to indoor tanning salons and changed their hair color to get noticed more. Boys thought she was easy, and girls thought she was shameless just by looking at her. The trouble was, none of it was true. She'd come by her looks naturally. Truth be known, she'd never even kissed a boy. And in fact, she no longer wanted to even do that.

She had liked a boy once. Really liked him. Kazuya Toujigamori, Touji, the boy she'd been caught looking at in school the other day that had led to Sae's little hallway interrogation and the impending date with disaster that the weekend might turn out to be. Touji had been nice to her, when a lot of others weren't. One day though, a friend of hers had told her, Touji didn't like girls with deep tans like hers. It had really hurt. And for a while after that, she'd been obsessed with trying to lose that tan of hers so Touji would be interested in her. It hadn't really worked very well through. Even though she'd stayed out of the water a lot and gone though a pile of bottles of sunblock, it hadn't really put all that much of a dent in her tan. And she'd been miserable too, really missing being in the water. Still, she'd tried so hard, because she knew it would be worth it to have someone special like Touji who would be in love with her. Someone to stand by her and go through life by her side. Someone to whom she could give her heart and trust it was safe....

But it hadn't worked out like that at all. She'd never told Touji how she felt. She knew a lot of people, and some of them were friendly to her. Lord knows she went out of her way to be friendly to them when she could - to try to show who she was, on the inside. But she still felt alone. She hadn't had even one good friend who she could point to and say: I've got someone in my life who really matters. All that changed one day though. And that had all been because of Sae Kashiwagi. Sae had come up to her in class and pretty much told her they were friends now. She hadn't cared what anyone else thought - and, one time, when some boys were giving her a hard time, one of them making some unwelcome advances towards her (it happened sometimes) - Sae had marched up and chewed them out so bad it was funny, and when she'd been done she'd dragged Momo away and they'd gone to an ice-cream parlor and then the park.

From that day on, thoughts of Touji, who had already started to fade in her thoughts of late, just seemed to be relegated more and more to the past. As feelings she'd once had that didn't matter anymore. She'd started to swim again and when Sae had told her how impressed she was with her ability, she'd taken to the pool again with the same passion she'd had for it when she'd first joined the swim team. And it had felt really, really good. Sae wasn't perfect of course, and Momo could see that. The other girl played tricks on her sometimes, and was way too nosey for complete comfort, but it didn't really matter to her any more. Sae was her friend, and the only one who cared. Sae was shorter than her, but also never hesitated putting herself in the way when someone was ragging on her or something.

It had happened slowly, and at first she wondered if it was real. If she could really feel that way about another girl. She'd been quieter than normal around the other girl for a few days, staring off into space or looking at other girls and at boys and imagining different scenarios to see if she was attracted to girls in general or boys, if it was just Sae, or what. Sae had grown more an more impatient with her over that, and finally gone on a little of a terror over it, managing to break Momo's withdrawn introspection and return them to something more normal. After that, Momo had caught herself many times just staring at the other girl with what she could only imagine was something like a love sick expression on her face. She'd done her best not to let Sae catch her at it, but it was getting harder and people were starting to notice more and more. She'd even caught this one group of girls talking in hushed tones and looking at her and Sae one day. She couldn't prove it, but she was sure they knew something was going on. Which was the story of her life really, because in reality there wasn't anything going on between her and Sae. The difference was though, that this time, she wanted there to be.

Thinking about it logically, that she'd promised Sae to tell her her feelings this weekend was probably for the best. Not that the fact of that made her stomach feel any more at ease about it mind you. Still, if this went on much longer, or if Sae really tried to look into the 'boy' that Momo had a crush on, the truth was sure to come out. Far better if Momo had the chance to break the news in private in her house and that Sae heard it from her and not someone else. That was actually the only reason she'd been caught staring at Touji that day, really. She'd been thinking and thinking about how she should tell Sae she was in love with her, or even if she should. She'd been looking at Touji to try to see if she still had any of her old feelings for him. If there had maybe been some mistake in all of this or something. But the only thing she'd felt for him was the fondness one felt for a memory, the echoes of a past hurt that had since healed itself, and maybe a small sense of regret at a friendship that had drifted apart before it had even begun...

Momo finally opened her eyes and looked at the picture in her hands. Sae's smiling face and oh so amazing eyes looked back at her and filled her with warmth and feelings of love and precious friendship. There had been no mistake. The only one she wanted to be with was Sae. She was sure of that now. And next Saturday, she would tell her. She would lay her heart on the line and risk it all for love.

She said a silent prayer to whoever would listen, that her heart would be safe and that Sae would love her back. The thought of anything else was just too painful for her to consider.

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The next few days had been a blur of activity, and they'd ended far too soon. Momo had been on a personal mission to impress and endear herself to her friend just as much as she could. She'd taken her to the fair grounds and paid for everything one afternoon, and the other they'd spent in town going wherever Sae wanted to. They'd ended up spending a lot of time in this video arcade actually. They had all these weird games Momo had never seen before, not that she'd spent much time playing video games or going to arcades or anything mind you. And she'd been really hopeless at most of them, so she hadn't even had to pretend to let Sae, who was likewise mostly ignorant of the games there, trounce her at everything. Momo had been good at the ones that required good aim though. She always had really good coordination (most of the time) and she'd ended up winning two stuffed animals and a cheep looking necklance for the other girl. Sae had greedily taken the items with pride and given Momo more than one hug, so delighted was she at the gifts that had been won for her.

Now all that was over though. It was almost ten and Sae would be here soon.

Momo was busily making sure her room was spotless and going over words in her mind again and again, still not quite having determined the best way to actually say it. "Sae, I'm in love with you." She spoke to the mirror on her wall, studying her face critically and wondering again if she should change her hair.

Before such a debate could again begin though, the doorbell rang. "Coming!" She yelled automatically, though she knew form experience that her guest wouldn't be able to hear her. She checked herself in the mirror one last time and raced down the stares to go and open the door.

"Hi!" She said excitedly as she opened the door. Her rush of energy fell right away though when she actually saw Sae standing there looking perfect in her casual Saturday clothes, the other girl's eyes locking with her own and staying there as if to say 'I know something'.

"Hi Momo." Sae said, eyes once again dancing at something only she knew what. "Can I come in?"

"Oh, um, sure." Momo said, moving aside for her friend who had already started to walk in before she'd had a chance to reply.

"So, you have something to tell me?" She asked.

"Um yeah, uh... Yes I do..." Momo looked at her and something inside her froze.

"Momo, are you o'kay?" Sae asked, genuinely seeming to be concerned. "You're acting kind'a strange."

Sae bent forward at the waist, hands on her hips, and made to study Momo as if to look for signs of what was wrong on the other girl's face.

"Oh, um," Momo laughed a little self consciously. "Yeah, I'm alright. I guess I... Just didn't get up on the right side of bed this morning, that's all."

Sae looked at her strangely. "Momo, you never get up on the right side of bed. There's a wall there." She pointed out.

Momo laughed again. "When you're right, you're right." She said. "So, um, you wan'a go upstairs?" She asked helplessly.

"Mm, o'kay. Sure. Lets go." Sae said, turning to go to the stairs. "But don't think I'm letting you off the hook just because you've got a brain injury or something." She pronounced, turning around and looking at Momo over her shoulder. "You are going to tell me your secret today. Got it?"

Momo laughed nervously again. "Got it." She said, trying to act calm and amiable. [I think I'm in trouble...] She thought to herself, quickly getting herself to move and follow Sae upstairs. [Please let me not mess this up.] She pleaded into the ether.

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See you next time...

Chapter 2

Momo was standing there, having just closed the door to her room. The other girl in the room held her attention completely. Sae was curiously looking around at the room, completely unashamed in her snooping. "You cleaned it." She said, looking Momo questioningly. "...Momo? Hey, Earth to Momo: Sae calling."

"Uh, ahahaha. Sorry." Momo said, shaking her head just a bit and walking over to sit down on the bed next to where Sae was standing and looking down at her hands.

"You're so funny some times." Sae said indulgently. "Let me guess, you're all flustered because you have to tell me about this little crush of yours. That's so cute."

Momo looked up at her kind of helplessly and their eyes met. "I um, yeah something like that." She said.

"So, just tell me already. Jeeze, you'd think you were talking to him and not me or something." She waved off rather irritably as she sat down on the floor facing her friend.

That brought Momo's attention right back to Sae's eyes in surprise. "...I am." She said simply, all her planning on what to say forgotten.

"You're what?" Momo asked. So far clueless.

"Talking to the boy I've got a crush on. Right now." Momo said rather helplessly.

"Um, you're doing what now?" Sae asked. "Momo, I'm..." But realization was perhaps starting to dawn a little. "Me?" She asked.

Momo nodded. "I'm so in love with you Sae, it's not even funny." She admitted with a sort of hopeless smile.

"This... You're not joking about this, are you?" Sae questioned, getting up and on her knees so she was a little closer.

"No, I'm really not." Momo said, getting down onto the floor too and sitting against her bed letting Sae fall back into a full sitting position across from her.

Sae just looked into her eyes like she was trying to puzzle something out. Momo's heart started to beat faster and faster and she couldn't move.

"Say something." Momo whispered. "Please."

"I um..." Sae started. "I..." She was looking deeply confused for a moment. Then she started to laugh, the kind of nervous laugh you laugh when the world has suddenly skewed and it for some reason strikes you that you should laugh. "I mean, Momo, I had no idea you.... You're really in love with me, you're not just saying it?" She asked, a little skepticism in her voice.

Momo just nodded and moved forward, getting to her knees and reaching out a hand to reverently touch Sae's face. Sae sat transfixed by the action, only blinking a few times as Momo's eyes held her and her lips came closer to her. She saw the kiss coming a mile away, but the sensation of Momo's soft lips brushing hers just lightly at first was still unexpected and confusing. When Momo moved forward just a little more and kissed her seriously, Sae felt like she was going to faint. Her eyes fluttered closed and her body seemed to feel everything all at once. Momo's hands were on her face, and her shoulder, warm fingers tracing over her skin, through her hair a little. Before she knew it though, the kiss was over and Momo's lips were gone. She felt a small whine of a noise come from her lips at the loss.

"I'm not making it up." Momo whispered to her, taking one of her hands in her own.

Sae blinked her eyes open and tried to catch her breath.

Momo watched her with eyes that were longing and scared. Sae felt feelings well up within her and she didn't know what to do with them. And so she did the only thing she could think to do. "I have to go." She said, getting herself up off the floor and making a hasty retreat from the room.

"Sae, wait!" Momo called, getting up and going after her to the door of her room, seeing Sae disappear down the stairs and hearing the door close behind her.

Momo held her hands to her chest and tried to breathe. She'd done it, she'd told Sae how she felt and... Momo started to cry. [She ran away...]

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Sae had at first run, then started to walk as she got farther from Momo's house. Her mind just kept going over and over it trying to deny what had just happened. "Momo loves me. I'm the boy. Me." She said out loud, laughing almost hysterically at the absurdity of that statement. She obviously wasn't a boy after all.

Sae slowed her pace even more as her thoughts started to clear and she really was able to think about it. Her mind analyzed the past, purposely ignoring anything about the present for the moment. She thought of the first time she'd seen Momo. Sae's family had just moved to the area and Sae had been sent to a new school where she hadn't known anyone and had no social standing at all. Not that she had been especially noticed in her old school of course. She'd just been a normal girl with normal friends that she was able to keep by her side by putting on a convincing act.

Sae remembered, she'd tried unsuccessfully a few times to insinuate herself into groups around the new school for the first few days. This one girl had taken a liking to her and let her join their group for lunch and let her hang around with them. They hadn't been really nice to her though, they'd been kind of nasty actually. All back handed insults sometimes dressed as flattery and sometimes not. Sae hadn't taken it personally though, she'd seen how that's how they treated everyone, even each other sometimes. But they accepted her and she could play their game, so she went along. It was just, one day she'd seen those girls as she'd entered the lunch hall, ganging up on this tall girl with orange hair. Momo, that was her name. Sae had remembered seeing her around, always with a smile on her face and seeming so at ease around everyone. It had made her jealous somehow, actually. Kinuye, the leader of their little clique had gotten up into Momo's face and was sneeringly saying something to her. Momo said something back and Kinuye pushed her. Momo went off on her, yelling how she was just a petty girl who didn't know anything and that she should just mind her own business. Kinuye tried to push her again, but Momo moved away that time and Kinuye fell having lost her balance. Sae had expected Momo to just let her fall, but the other girl hadn't done that. She'd caught her. Something about that just stayed with Sae for the rest of the day.

Oh, she'd gone over to her 'friends' and listened to them go on about things during lunch, talking about first Momo, saying how pathetic she was, then moving on to other topics and it had all just seemed to blur together for Sae. She just couldn't care about what they said anymore.

That night she'd gone home thinking about the brave girl with the orange-blonde hair who showed such kindness even when she was being attacked like that. By the next morning, she'd made up her mind that Momo was going to be her friend no matter what.

As it turned out it had been just about the easiest thing to achieve she'd ever had to try. By the next day they were almost inseparable. Kinuye and the others had seen this and of course none too politely made it clear she wasn't welcome with them any more. Sae had absolutely delighted in telling them off and saying that that was fine, she didn't want to hang around such stupid and boring people anyway.

Over the next weeks it had been like she'd really started to live more than she had sense she was little. Momo was so different than anyone she'd met before. So different than the friends she'd had before, so different than her family. She was kind but not meek, her life wasn't close to perfect like Sae had thought it was at first, but she seemed to have this uncanny ability to be happy with it all anyway. She'd had this weird hang up about getting into the water again, and wearing sunblock, but Sae had gotten her to forget about that silliness soon enough. It was weird too, no matter what Sae said or did, Momo still liked her. Sometimes she couldn't figure out why. She didn't actually consider herself to be a very likable person really. She wanted people to think she was of course, but she knew in her heart she wasn't. But with Momo around, she actually had started to feel like maybe she really was.

Sae stopped in her walking and sat down on a bench. She sat with her legs together, her arms crossed over her knees, and her back hunched over a little so her gaze was focused on her arms and the ground. [How did this happen?] She wondered. [How did Momo fall in love with me?]

She thought about the last few days. Momo taking her out to the fair like that, going to the arcade and stuff. It had been almost like they'd been dating, she considered. Surprised by how much that idea was starting to intrigue her. She felt like laughing again. Thinking about how she'd felt that day when she'd caught Momo looking so intently at that boy like that. She went over it and she'd realized, she'd felt threatened by him. Somewhere inside, she'd needed Momo to tell her it wasn't true. That she still belonged to her and only her... [Well, now I know.] Sae told herself. Momo was definitely hers. More than she'd ever even considered, Momo was hers now. The only question was [What am I going to do with her?]

This time she really did laugh. [And why not?] She told herself, sitting up straighter. [Why shouldn't she be mine? It's not like I have any better offers.] She sat back on the bench seat and relaxed her pose a little. [Yeah. This could be a good thing.] She told herself. Thinking of what it would be like. Visions of that kiss going through her mind like temping little flickers of pleasure. Her lips tingled at the thought of having Momo kiss her again like that. That led her mind to take things further. She imagined what it would be like, to be with another girl like that. To be with Momo like that. To really make her hers completely. She knew Momo was safe now. That she'd be safe with her.... And the more she thought about it the more she wanted it, the more she wanted to possess that feeling, to have her friend and hold her heart in the palm of her hands as it were.

Sae picked herself up, a determined look in her yes. "You want me Momo, you've got me." She told the wind.

Her mind made plans and her imagination filled with ideas as she walked. She imagined being in bed with Momo, those eyes looking down on her, their lips meeting again. Their hands moving and touching... The more she thought about it, the more she quickened her pace. [Momo, you're mine.] She thought to herself giddily as she went back along the way to Momo's house, imagining the look on her friend's face when she saw her again.

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Momo lay in her bed, curled up on her side again. This time though her thoughts were not peaceful or hopeful at all. She was still love sick, but this time it was a woeful despairing kind of love sick. [She probably hates me now.] Her mind told her not for the first time... Her stomach hurt and she felt like she was going to die and a part of her wished it would just happen so it wouldn't hurt so much.

The look in Sae's eyes after she'd kissed her came to her mind's eye again. She tried to tell what it meant again, and again she didn't have any answers. The kiss though, that kiss had been everything she'd imagined it would be and more. Her first kiss. In that moment when her lips had first brushed up against Sae's, she felt like she had been coming home at last. And when they'd kissed, it was like her world had been turned on it's ends and everything she'd ever wondered about herself had come into clear focus. But now that was all over... She couldn't stand it if Sae never wanted to see her again. She was sure she wouldn't be able to survive it if that were true. It just hurt so, so much and it wasn't getting any better.

In the midst of this deep and spiraling despair, though, a doorbell rang.

Momo had first thought maybe she was imagining it, but it rang again. Opening her eyes, Momo stared blankly for a moment as hope seemed to bring her back to life again. "Sae?" She whispered to herself, somehow absolutely sure it was her at the door. She got up out of bed, tripping and fumbling over the rumpled sheets so she almost fell on her face, she yet managed to get herself up and race to the door of her room and down the stairs, wiping off her tears along the way. "Sae. It's you, I know it is." She said to herself as she cleared the bottom of the staircase and breathlessly flung open the door to see Sae's smiling face looking back up at her.

"Aw. You poor thing." Sae said as she walked in past Momo without asking if she could or not. "You've really been crying over me, haven't you?" She asked. Somehow the thought of that made her insanely pleased with herself.

"You came back." Momo said, her voice broken from crying. Hope lighting up in her eyes now even more.

Sae nodded. "And I've made up my mind, too."

"Um, you have?"

"Yeah." Sae said, stepping forward so their bodies were just inches apart, her hands resting on Momo's waist. "And I want you to kiss me again." She told her.

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See you next time...

Chapter 3

Momo was caught in Sae's eyes a moment. [Did she just say what I thought she just said?] She wondered. "Huh?"

"I said, kiss me again." Sae told her, moving in closer so Momo had to tilt her head down a little more to keep eye contact. "It shouldn't be that hard for you, you know? You did it before, right?" She said a little teasingly, her lips amazingly close now.

Momo didn't think anymore, she just kissed the girl she loved. Their lips met, she felt Sae respond to her more this time, felt her lips part for her. Their bodies pressed closer together, Momo brought one hand up to Sae's cheek and just let herself get lost in how perfect and amazing this felt. Like she could just keep doing this, kissing with Sae, forever... she started to feel a little self-conscious though, how this was happening so fast, and was this for real, so she broke off the kiss. She was breathing a little heavily, her heart felt like it was racing in her chest. "Sae..."

"Wow..." Sae said before Momo could think what to say next, touching her lips with her fingers. "Momo, you're really good at that, you know?" She said softly, a little smile playing over her lips as their eyes met. "...Have you kissed other girls before me, or... am I the first?" She asked with a little of a challenge in her voice.

"What? Of course I haven't! I mean, um, yes? You're... you're my first kiss." Momo said, feeling her skin get warm.

"Well, that's good." Sae said. "You're... I mean, a boy kissed me once before... but I didn't really like him, and you're so much better at it." She told her, sliding her hand up Momo's side until it was over her ribs.

Momo smiled. "You think so?" She asked softly.

"Definitely. In fact... I've decided. I want to be your girlfriend, Momo." Sae said. "And I want to go back up to your room and make out some more. You want that too, right?" She asked, almost daring Momo to say no.

"I, I mean yes, definitely yes. I mean of course I... want that too." Momo said, kind of not really quite able to get herself to believe this was actually happening right now after everything had seemed so horrible just a few moments before. "But, um, what changed your mind? I thought..."

"Shush, okay? I just, you caught me by surprise, Momo, you know? I'm sorry I ran away like that, but I needed to think. You get that, right? I mean, I never thought I was the boy you liked. I just... we're both girls Momo, it's not exactly normal, is it?" Sae explained.

"No, I guess not..." Momo said, looking away a little. "But, you thought about it, and you decided... you want to be with me anyway?" She asked hopefully.

"Pretty much." Sae told her. "I figure I should at least try it, right?" She said a little airily. "And..." She stepped closer again, touching Momo's arm. "I kind of like the idea of having you all to myself, you know?"

"Really?" Momo asked, feeling happier and happier about this the more Sae talked.

"Yeah, I mean... it's not like I felt that way about you, but, I thought about it just now, and I had to admit, I kind of hated the idea of you getting a boyfriend, Momo, at least when I didn't have one." Sae told her. "In fact, I think... no, I'm pretty sure, I would have hated it even then anyway. I don't want to share you Momo, I like... I like having you to myself. So, I guess I'm kind of selfish?"

"I wouldn't mind if you are." Momo said, touching her face a little reverently. "I just... you're the one I want to be with, Sae, the one I always want to be with. No matter what I'm doing. Everything just feels so much better when I'm with you, you know?" She told her.

"Oh, Momo..." Sae hugged her, a few tears coming to her eyes.

Momo held her as Sae started to cry in earnest. She backed away a little and led Sae to sit with her at the bottom of the stairs. "Sae, what is it? What's wrong? Did I... did I say something...?"

"Momo, no. No, okay? You're perfect. I just... sometimes, I wonder, why you even like me, and now this, and it's like... how'd it happen? Why'd you fall in love with me, Momo? Why?" Sae asked, her voice shaking a little, she sounded vulnerable and a little scared. She hated that she was acting like this too, in front of Momo, but the feeling had just come over her when Momo said all those things, and she had to know. What did Momo see in her that she didn't see in herself? What had she done to get Momo to fall for her so hard?

"Sae, I, what are you talking about? I mean... why wouldn't I fall in love with you?" Momo was having a hard time getting her head around what Sae had just said. Sae had never acted like this with her before. She'd always acted so... confident. So sure of herself. "You really don't know?"

"No, Momo, I really don't, okay? So tell me. Why me?" Sae asked, staring at her with determination, her eyes sparkling with emotion, willing Momo to say something.

"...Do you want a list?" Momo smiled a little. "Okay. You're always nice to me, well, usually at least, and even when you're not, I kind of like that too somehow, because it's easy to see... you care about me, and that's what matters. You stand up for me when no one else does, and that means a lot. And I can tell, you see me for who I am, and that's amazing. You're like, the best friend I've ever had, Sae. You're always there for me... When I'm not with you, I want to be. And, um, I didn't start really noticing it, not the way I do now at least, until I'd known you for a while... you know, because we're both girls, I didn't think about... um, because you're right, it's not very normal to feel this way I guess... but, you're beautiful. And the way you look at me, it just... takes my breath away sometimes. And your smile... when you smile just for me, sometimes I think I'd do just about anything to get you to smile at me that way. My heart speeds up, I feel so warm inside, and I just want to kiss you. So... of course I'm in love with you..."

Sae smiled to her then and got up a little and kissed her. What Momo had said to her, it was like the words where sunshine and a flower was blooming inside her heart from the warmth and light they'd given her. "I... I never knew..." She said softly, kissing her again, almost getting up on her lap. Momo's mind went blank, her heart sped up, she felt like something inside of her was just going to burst this felt so good. "I never knew something like this could even happen..." Sae said softly. "I'm just... I'm so happy it did. I'm so..." She rested her forehead on Momo's. "But... it's not going to be easy, is it? Being together. Our parents... and who knows what everyone at school would do if they ever found out..."

Momo sighed. "You're probably right. Um, but could we go upstairs to talk about this, it's not very comfortable sitting like this for me you know?" Momo told her.

Sae sort of snapped out of whatever frame of mind she'd been in and realized she was sitting on Momo's lap and probably pressing her back against the next stair up. "Oh, uh, sorry Momo." Sae laughed a little, getting up and offering her hand to Momo. "Come on, let's go." She said, trying to flirt a little with the way she looked at Momo.

They went up the stairs and back to Momo's room. Sae shut the door behind them and leaned back against the closed door. "So... you're my girlfriend now, is that right?" She asked, a playful smile dancing over her lips, shining in her eyes as she looked at Momo and tried picturing what it would be like to take off her clothes and have sex with a girl, with Momo. She couldn't think of specifically what she would do, but the general outlines and vague impressions her imagination came up with where more than enough to convince her that she wanted to try it. Wanted Momo to be her first.

"Um, yeah, of course... I mean, you want to be, right?" Momo asked, sitting down on her bed and looking into Momo's eyes, trying to read the other girl better. She still felt scared, like after Sae said she had to go after she'd kissed her, like this amazing thing that was happening between her and the girl she loved could all be taken away again if she said or did the wrong thing.

"I said I did, didn't I? So I am, and you're mine, right? My girlfriend?" Sae asked further, pushing off a bit from the door and walking towards Momo, her eyes fixed on hers.

Momo swallowed a little, her heart beating faster, her skin feeling warmer and a little tingly, and she wanted to touch Sae so much right then, wanted to be kissing her again, or just to hold her in her arms... "I'm definitely yours alright." Momo said softly, kind of ruefully admitting to herself just how much the other girl had her wrapped around her finger.

"Then... I get to do whatever I want with you, don't I?" Sae asked, bending over and bracing her hands on the bed on either side of Momo then moving in to kiss her, Momo leaning back a little to let her.

"What... um, what do you want to do with me?" Momo asked, a happy smile coming to her lips. She liked this game.

"Girlfriend things." Sae said seriously, straddling Momo's lap and kissing her again, bringing both her hands to Momo's cheeks, feeling Momo's hands come to her waist and slide over her back. She felt like her body wanted this, wanted to touch, to connect... and it felt just so right to her. She remembered how it had been with that boy, the one who'd kissed her. She'd let him touch her some, let him take off her shirt. But it hadn't felt like this... it hadn't been bad with him, just... boring. This was anything but boring, she wanted to do more. A lot more. She just hoped it all wouldn't end up being a disappointment somehow.

Sae was kissing her so possessively now, Momo could hardly find moments to breathe, not that she minded at all. This was the best thing to happen to her, ever, she was sure of it. She didn't care how much trouble this could cause for her, with her family or at school, feeling the way she was now, she was perfectly willing to go through all the hardships she had to so she could keep this.

"Take off my clothes." Sae told her breathlessly after she stopped kissing her new girlfriend. 'Momo's girlfriend' She even liked how that sounded in her head. That is, it sounded weird of course, like if you thought cherry trees where pretty your whole life but you didn't know you could eat the cherries, then one day someone told you it was okay, and then you're like, 'Cherries are so good, why didn't someone say something sooner?' Like that.

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See you next time...

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