Disclaimer: I do not own anything. (sigh) why don't I own anything!T_T
This is my first time writing a fanfic about Shizuru and Natsuki so please be gentle with me. Oh yeah, and please don't forget to leave a review! Gracias!
bold-Say What You Need To Say lyrics (John Mayer)
Italics-thoughts
Well..Here it goes!
Say What You Need To Say
'Her smile is too wide! Who is that guy anyway and why is she with him?' Natsuki thought while looking at Shizuru who is talking to a stranger (at Natsuki at least)at the school courtyard. She felt a pang of jealousy wash over her because Shizuru's mask that she usually wears in front of the people is not on. 'She sometimes wear that mask even when she's with me and I know it.' Natsuki realized just a couple of weeks ago that what she felt for her best friend is love. She only told Mai and Mikoto (since she was there eating Mai's ramen) about her discovery.
Take all your wasted honor
Every little past frustration
“Did you tell Shizuru about your you-know-what?” Natsuki finally took away her death stare from Shizuru and the stranger and turned to Mai, who she totally forgot was standing beside her. Natsuki shook her head from left to right for about three times. Frustration is evident from her eyes and a frown can be seen from her lips. She saw, from the corner of her right eye, that Shizuru and the stranger stood up and began to walk towards the main entrance of the academy. When Shizuru disappeared from her sight, she turned her attention back to Mai. “I don't know how to tell her Mai. She has been waiting for my answer for a long time now. What if she doesn't want to hear it anymore?” 'What if she doesn't love me anymore and has finally moved on?' But Natsuki didn't voice out her last question. Mai thoughtfully looked at her. “Just tell her Natsuki. I'm quite sure she'll understand.” “But I'm not good at this kind of stuff!” Natsuki grumbled out and Mai smiled at her friend's excuses. “Confess Natsuki and just see what happens.”
Take all of your so called problems
Better put 'em in quotations
After Mai said her goodbye (since she has to go to work), Natsuki walked towards the place where Shizuru and the guy sat. She got beside the fountain and stared at the vacant seat, decided to sit rather hard on it while still wearing the frown on her face. Anyone who sees her knew that the girl is frustrated about something.
“Just say it.” One passing guy accidentally said the words out loud. Natsuki immediately turned towards the guys and gave them her death glare. Sweats formed on their fore heads and the two guys began walking fasting, trying to get away from the ice princess. “Did you confess yet?” Few giggling girls that was sitting close to the fountain said and Natsuki, also, gave them her death stare. But instead of being scared, the girls sighed and swooned. 'Maybe they're some of my fans...' But before she gets back to her precious thoughts, children went running in front of her and they kept shouting, “Say it! Say it! Say it!” Natsuki couldn't believe what she was hearing so she stood up and speed walked towards the main entrance. When she got inside, she heard one of the teachers say, “Tell her already before it's too late.” She almost tripped from nothing and her head began to throb. 'What on earth is wrong with these people?!All I can hear is 'say it' or 'confess' or 'tell her'! Gosh, is this like a-a-a sign?!'
Say what you need to say (2x)
Say what you need to say (2x)
Say what you need to say (2x)
Say what you need to say (2x)
Natsuki is still frozen on the spot close to the main entrance when she heard a very familiar voice with a Kyoto accent call out her name. “Natsuki!” She turned around to where the voice is coming from and just looked at the person who said her name. She saw Shizuru, who is standing beside the annoying guy, in front of the Kaichou office. “What are you doing standing in the middle of the hallway?” Natsuki didn't know how to respond so she just stood there and felt her blood rush to her head. “Ara, ara, did I say something embarrassing this time?” Shizuru said teasingly and turned to face the guy beside her. “Kei this is Kuga Natsuki.” She said pointing towards her and then she did the same thing to Natsuki. “Natsuki this is Kei.” They both nodded to each other but tension can be felt around them and it is mostly coming from Natsuki. She actually wanted to ask the brunette about why the guy was here for but it seem like the cat got her tongue.
“Will you go with me to show Kei the garden?” Natsuki was about to decline the offer but then she realized that if she did, then Shizuru will be alone with the guy again. “Yeah sure. I have nothing else to do anyway.” The trio turned around and began to walk pass the main entrance, pass the main entrance and turned left heading for the garden. Natsuki didn't realize it but she was walking rather stiffly, almost like a robot. Her body was so tense that her steps were quite heavy and she looks like she's about to attack someone. But Natsuki didn't realize all this because she was busy giving her death stare at Kei back. She still wanted (badly) to know his relationship with the Kyoto woman but it looks like her mouth had failed her because no words are coming out of her lips.
Walking like a one man army
Fighting with the shadow in your head
'What if she already moved on? Am I too late?' 'But she said that she's willing to wait for my answer.' Natsuki is battling with her own thoughts. She remembered the day after the Hime festival.
-flashback-
Natsuki and Shizuru went back to the garden where they first met (and where they're going now). Shizuru officially told Natsuki about what she felt for the blue-haired girl.”But you don't have to hurry for your answer Natsuki. I'll wait until you're sure about what you feel.” Shizuru said with a smile on her lips but Natsuki knew that it took all her effort from the brunette to not shed a tear in from of her.
-end of flashback-
Natsuki kept thinking about that moment so she didn't notice Shizuru's questioning eyes that was staring straight at her.
Shizuru has been watching Natsuki and did not understand why the biker was walking so rigidly. She stopped walking, so did Kei, but Natsuki didn't notice and so she kept on walking. 'Ara, it looks like she's thinking about something really deeply.' Shizuru saw the confusion in Kei's eyes because Natsuki kept walking and both of them already stopped. “Natsuki?” Shizuru said a little louder than her normal voice to take Natsuki out of her thoughts.
Natsuki was startled when she heard her name being called by Shizuru. She just now realized that she was ten steps away from them and that they seem to have stopped moments ago. 'Damn it! I was too busy thinking!' She looked at Shizuru's questioning gaze and knew that she had to tell her what she was thinking or the brunette will force it out of her. 'I have to tell her now before it's too late, but how?' Then Mai's words came to her mind. 'Guess I'll just tell her what I think and feel about her. Yeah, that seems to be the best choice. And I have to do it now or I'll lose all my courage later.' Natsuki was about to say something but realized that there was an unnecessary presence with them and so she had to ask him to leave first. 'As politely as I can...' Natsuki faced Kei and said, “Will you please give us couple of minted, Kei-san?” He knew from the look that was given to him by Natsuki that they needed privacy and so he excused himself and headed back to the courtyard.
'Am I doing this right?' Again, Natsuki began to doubt her decision but then she heard Shizuru speak. “Do you have something important to tell me Natsuki?” Surprise is evident from her voice since this is the first time that Natsuki dismissed another person just to talk to her.
“Shizuru, I-I...” Natsuki hesitated again. She looked away from Shizuru's eager eyes and focused on the blooming flowers.
“I-I don't know how to say this...”
Living up the same old moment
Knowing' you'd be better off instead
If you could only
Say what you need to say
After what seems like forever (in reality it's only a minute), Natsuki opened her mouth again and words began to spill from her lips. But she was talking so fast and low that Shizuru couldn't catch a single word she's saying.
“Natsuki, slow down no one's after you.” Shizuru said teasingly and patiently. She saw Natsuki sigh and she started from the beginning while looking at Shizuru's eyes.
“Shizuru, I care for you. I deeply care for you. I—I before all those things happened, you already play a huge part of my life. You see, I thought I didn't need anyone but you showed me how lonely life can be without anyone by your side. I now realize that I was just scared of being emotionally dependent on someone. I was scared of losing another person again, just like a lost my mom. But you crushed my belief! You melted the wall I built around my heart. I—I know I'm not making any sense right now...”
Shizuru was about to say something but Natsuki notice this and continued.
“Let me finish Shizuru. If I don't say it now, I'm afraid I may never have the chance or courage again.”
Shizuru didn't let out a single word and continued listening to her.
“After I finally admitted to myself that you are my friend, the Hime festival happened. Then you told me what you really feel. I didn't want to believe it. I was scared again because I did not have any control on the situation. I—I was scared of becoming—more than friends. But you understood my fear. After the festival, you promised me that you'll wait for my answer. You are very kind to me Shizuru. I'm not sure if I deserve such love. After days and nights of thinking, I finally admitted to myself what you truly are to me. I want to tell you but I did not know how. You know me Shizuru, I'm not very good on expressing myself. Then I saw you laughing with something Kei said. You don't usually take down your mask when you're in public but with him you looked at ease. (Natsuki broke their eye contact, bowed down her head and stared at the ground.) You look more at ease with him than when you are outside with me. I'm jealous since I'm not the one who made you smile nor laugh. I felt anger for myself—because—because it seems like I always cause you pain. I—I--Damn it! I'm rambling again! (Natsuki sighed, frustrated) I guess my point for saying all this is that—that-- I'm in love with you!” Natsuki said the last three words so fast but Shizuru heard it this time.
Shizuru couldn't believe what she's hearing. The words she wanted to hear from the other girl is finally said. Natsuki is baring her very soul and offering it to her. She began to shed tears-tears of joy.
Have no fear for giving' in
Have no fear for giving over
You better know that in the end
It's better to say too much,
Than never to say what you need to say again
But Natsuki didn't see Shizuru's reaction since she still had her head bowed down. Her whole body began shaking since she uttered the first word and it took a lot of effort for her to continue talking. 'She's not saying anything! I messed up! She probably didn't want to hear all of this now!' Suddenly, her knees aren't strong enough to support her body weight and she knelt in the middle of the garden. She has her eyes close and tears are coming out of her eyes. 'At least I told her' Natsuki thought, trying to console her broken spirit and aching heart.
Even when your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as the eyes are closing'
Do it with a heart wide open
Shizuru watched Natsuki's actions and realized that she hasn't said anything yet. 'Knowing Natsuki, she probably thinks that I did not accept her confession.' Shizuru walked three steps to close the gap between her and the blue-haired girl. She grabbed the girl's hand and notice that her Natsuki is shaking. 'Oh Natsuki.' Shizuru thought while taking both of the girl's hands into her own. Then she released her right hand and reached for Natsuki's chin. She slowly tipped her chin up and her heart nearly broke when she saw the face of the other girl. Natsuki's eyes were close really tight and tears kept flowing out. Shizuru gently wiped the tears away.
Natsuki slowly opened her eyes and she was shocked on how close the brunette's face is from her own. Natsuki silently gulped while her eyes focused on the red lips that was coming closer and closer. It stopped merely inches away from her own lips and spoke. “Say it again Natsuki.” The words were spoken like a pleas and it took Natsuki away from her trance. “I love you Shizuru.” Natsuki said and the short gap was breached by her and their lips finally met.
The kiss lasted for a couple of minuted. When they finally broke apart, both of them were breathing quite hard but satisfaction can be seen from their eyes. “And I love you too Natsuki.”
Say what you need to say (2x)
Say what you need to say (2x)
Say what you need to say (2x)
Say what you need to say (2x)
---Extra---
Natsuki- So you never told me who that guy was! (said with a cute pout on her lips)
Shizuru- (using her teasing tone) Ara, ara, Natsuki's jealous
Natsuki- Shizuru! (while blushing really hard)
Shizuru- (still using her teasing tone) He's a cousin from my father's side
Natsuki- Then I worried for nothing?! (anger can be seen from her face)
Shizuru- (with an amused tone) Ara, I didn't say you need to worry about him. And at least you got jealous and finally told me what you feel.
Natsuki- But!!But!! Argh! (clenched her fist)
Shizuru- (using a flirty tone) Natsuki looks cute when she's mad.
Natsuki- I do not! (wanting to have the last word, she silence Shizuru with the only way she knows)
A/N- ^_^ I know. But I love fluffs! ^_^ review pwetty pwease?