Chapter Two - Mutuality
It was just past one thirty in the afternoon, and it already was literally hell. I had eleven of my relatives in my house, with another seven or eight coming. They all would be sleeping downstairs in the rumpus room, in the front room and even in my Dad’s little den off of the front room.... anywhere there could be a space for someone to flop down A zoo would have been less chaotic than what it will be when they all had finally arrived.
My Great Aunt was already on her third glass of wine at this point of the afternoon, while sitting there eating away at the snack mix like crazy. She was just a little too ‘perky’ at the moment, talking away with my Aunt Sophie about some damned thing back home. The wine had loosened her already talkative nature... and she was in full verbal flight.
I watched Auntie for a moment, as she would take a sip of wine, talk, then a handful of snack mix... over and over again. I shuttered, as this woman alway was like this at any gathering of our family that I had been at. I could only feel a little embarrassed, thinking when my Uncle Peter arrives finally, you will see just how someone ‘drinks’, as he puts it. I shuttered and wished I was somewhere else... I was hating my family right now.
I eyed the young twins who were playing with some toy trucks just near the front door. They were being pretty good at this point, almost angels by most people’s standards...but I was thinking this was just the calm before they got something in their heads. When they did that, the angels turned into little devils.
Soon, I had suddenly been corralled by another one of my older Aunts from my mom’s side. This little meeting with this relative usually would end up with me feeling like this was a fate worse than death itself. She did not disappoint. Auntie Jenny was a sweet lady of about fifty or so, but the woman always seemed to find a way to totally embarrass me at some point. She had stopped me to ‘just chat for awhile, but I was soon regretting that I had stoped.
With in the space of two short minutes of our talk, Aunt Jenny already commented on how grown-up I was becoming, but voiced her concerns that I only had ‘little boobies’, as she put it. She actually reached out and measured them with her hands... touching them while she went on to tell me that my mother had larger ones than mine when she was just eleven years old. I tried to be nice and let that pass, but she started asking me about if I had gotten my period yet... and that was when I looked for a way out at that point.
It was true that I only had an A-cup at this point, and I started my period only a few months back... but I wished Aunt Jenny did not have to point it all out so loudly that other people could hear. She was truly sweet woman who I did love, but she had that sort of voice that could bend steel or be used as a weapon by the government.... that made these little talks almost public record. When she had made her comments, it was more than loud enough that everyone in the front room ended up hearing about my ‘little boobies’ and my ‘period’. I could have crawled into a hole and hid there forever.
To make my embarrassment complete, my nine year old cousin Max had over heard my Aunt Jenny commenting on my lack of boobs, and now he was happily relaying the information at the top of his lungs to some of the other people in the room with alarming volume. More than mortified, I just tried to ignore the little weasel... making a mental note in the back of my mind to thump him a couple of times when the chance became available.
I finally got the chance to excuse myself, I did so, not wanting any more of my Auntie’s little chats... I felt humiliated enough for one day, expecting my Aunt was readying herself to ask me if I had grown any pubic hairs next. I went straight into the kitchen to try and find a small space of peace and quiet for awhile. next.. I knew that the woman was capable of asking such a private thing... and I was desperately wanting to avoid that as much as I could.
I found the kitchen only had my Dad and his brother sitting at the table talking over a beer. I unfortunately overheard that they were talking about the finer points of cow and sheep manure for growing different plants in different soils. Uncle Otto was a farmer, that was fine... but I wished that Uncle and my Dad would not be discussing such stuff like that.
I wrinkled my nose while I hurried past them into the main area of the kitchen. The two had now started to talk about butchering some hogs and curing the meat for later, because Uncle Otto had them ready for it back on the farm. That image of killing those cute animals flashed in my head, and made me sick to my stomach all over again.
I just grabbed a cold can of coke from the fridge as fast as I could, then went on the hunt to find a place to enjoy the drink... without having to listen to all of this farmer’s speak. With the house as full as it was, I soon came to realize that there was no such place anywhere in the house. My next place to search for a little quiet space, was outside.
I went into the backyard, after I had secreted myself out of the patio doors without anyone seeing that I had.. I found that there was actually no one out here, and I felt so damned relieved with that. Taking a seat on one of the chairs that was already set out for the bar-b-q that was going to be for supper, I popped the can open and layed back to enjoy quietness. I could only hear the murmurs of all of those voices inside, and took pleasure in not being in there and subjected to any more family craziness.
" Finally... we have silence..." I said to myself as I layed there under the hot sun to enjoy this small moment of peace.
I was out there for about ten minutes, when Libby came out of the house while walking rather quickly as she did. I looked at the girl, and could see that she was kind of distressed over something. I looked at her closer...By the look that was on her face, I could tell that Auntie Jenny had somehow cornered her inside, just like me.
I chuckled, thinking that my face probably looked the exact same way only about twenty minutes ago. The woman had that sort of effect on people, I concluded
" Let me guess..." I smirked and looked at my cousin. " By that ‘holy shit’ look you have... you were set upon by our one and thankfully only...Aunt Jenny?"
Libby twisted her head to look right at me as soon as I had finished asking her the question Her eyes opened widely, and a little shocked type of noise could be heard coming out of her.
" How in the hell did you know Auntie Jenny had cornered me?" She asked, her face telling me that I was right.
" Easy... She cornered me awhile back..."
" Did she say strange things to you?" She asked.
" She came right out and told me she was worried about me not growin’ boobs yet..." I said with a long sigh. " She actually cupped my tits once, actually touching them with both hands while she was making her point about my lack of size."
Libby shook her head while she began to laugh hard, her face showed her shock at our aunt’s blunt ways. I found myself enjoying just listening to Libby laugh away, while she took a seat on the chair next to me. That laughter was so musical, and it turned out to be infectious as well... as I found myself laughing hard also.
" Aunt Jenny actually did that to you?" She asked, through a small break in her laughter. " She touched you tits ‘n’ everything?"
I nodded, my mind playing back that moment in my head, and I felt a little weird with the images.
" She did...then began to tell me that my Mom had bigger breasts when she was just eleven, and how she was wondering why at thirteen that I did not have the same size." I told her, shuttering while explaining things. " Then came the question about if I had gotten my period... I nearly died when she came out with that..."
" God , I would have died right there.." Sighed Libby.
" Felt like it to me..." I giggled.
She moved in a little closer and looked into my face.
" She asked me something... even more embarrassing than that..." She said, wrinkling her cute nose up to accent her words.
" Do I wanna know what she asked, or not?" I said, seeing in her face, that she still was in shock from the meeting with our beloved Auntie.
Libby giggled and seemed to get a little bashful. I waited, her reaction made me curious to know what sort of thing our Aunt had said.
" She came right out and asked me if ‘ I was seeing somebody... in that way’... as she put it." She said, shaking her head.
" No!" I gasped, this was even out there, even for Auntie. " She asked you that straight to your face? She actually asked you if you were having sex yet?"
" She went a little farther than just asking me if I was having sex...." Libby warned.
" More?" I echoed, my mind playing with what ever else that woman would have came up with. " What else could she have asked you?"
I looked right at Libby’s face, as the girl gave a look of being sheepish with what she had to say. It looked like this was big as well.
" She was going to give me the talk about ‘keeping my legs closed until I was married’, but thankfully someone from the family diverted her attention, and I got the hell out of there." She laughed, while she blushed as well. " Imagine getting that same talk from someone who has never been married yet..."
I felt the tears running down my face, as my laughter poured out of me. Aunt Jenny had always been like this, but even this was pushing it a wee bit too much.
" Man... that is just so wrong on so many levels..." I said, as our laughter abated only a little. " Did you answer her?"
" Thank God she had been distracted when she had been..." Libby said, grinning broadly. " Whether I ended up saying anything... do you think that would have mattered very much?"
I shook my head, and started to laugh again. She was right on that one... whatever we would have said, whether it was pure bullshit or not... Aunt Jenny would have picked it up and gone to some other very embarrassing topic, or worse. I sighed, and just wondered about the stability of the woman.
We just fell into talking about other things, ignoring the buzz that was coming from the house. She seemed to be oddly nervous as we sat there, but I was to... but probably not for the same reasons. I was thinking just how pretty Libby was for most of the time and fighting these thoughts all of the time.
We were just sitting there, when we noticed that a figure had slipped out of the patio doors from the house. We each looked up, and saw who it was at the same time. We both sighed and give one another a look, as this was perhaps the last person we wanted any thing to do with in the entire family
Standing there just looking at us like we were dirt on her shoes, was my oldest cousins from my Dad’s side of the family. Tammy Lee had just turned all of nineteen... a dyed blond haired bitch of a girl who always had been a pain in the ass since the age of five. She was the only other person in the family that I had despised... with how things were with Libby now, she had just hit the top of that list.
Pretty and so full of herself, Tammy Lee was the perfect pick to be a poster child for being a spoiled rich brat in every sense of what that implies. Her parents had split up years ago, and her mother had remarried a very wealthy man who was not averse to loosening his wallet at any time. Getting anything she ever wanted from her Mom and step father... as well as getting many guilt induced gifts from her real father... Tammy Lee had everything a teen could ask for... except perhaps owning a personality.
Tammy Lee sauntered over with this smug look of superiority on he face. She stopped beside where Libby and I were sitting... and just hung there for a moment with a unnerving smirk.. We both waited to see just what she was going to say, knowing that she had something to say.
" I see that you two are now being quite chummy... this is a development all on its own.." The young woman said, her voice dripping with pin-point sarcasm as she leered at us snobbishly.
" And that is a bad thing in your eyes... because why?" Libby asked flatly, as the girl stood there.
" All I am saying that it is quite sweet to see you two are getting along like this... but it is in a sort of retarded way as well..." She said, looking at us with such a contemptuous stare, that it was maddening. " This is so indicative of this side of the family... I am glad that we have little contact."
Libby looked at Tammy Lee and made a face, a glint of anger flashing in her eyes. Libby and I have had our differenced in the past, but I always knew that she hated Tammy Lee. In looking at Libby’s pretty face squirrel up and show how much she loathed the girl right now, showed that some things had not changed in that area.
Turned back to stare at the snobbish girl as well, finding this most hated cousin of ours was making me hate her even more than I already was feeling. This was one relative I would have rather never seen.
" Are you suppose to be out trying to find a personality to fill your empty life, Tammy?" I said, letting my own brand of sarcasm free.
" Please... when you look as good as I always do, that does not even matter." Tammy Lee said, her smarminess painting her tone
" Looking good?" I said, my brain churning for a comeback. " the only way you keep looking good, aside from having full access to mommy dearest’s unlimited credit cards... is by constantly sticking your fingers down your throat after every meal."
Tammy Lee just give a droll sort of laugh, and looked at me with an air of distain. She rocked on her feet a few times, as she glared at the both of us.
"At least I have a body to start off with... I have been blessed with the perfect one all along..." She said dryly, eyeing me in the meantime " Judging by what you look like... Makes me think that you need to just give up right now and become a boy, Amy darling.."
I glared at the dark haired girl who smirked back at me with such glee, feeling the urge that I wanted to smack her one with something really heavy... or at least something that was sharp and pointy. I knew that I was only four foot ten and weighed less than a hundred pounds dressed in my underwear... I did not need that pampered... anorexic... bleached blond pain in the ass to point out that. I already had a unmarried Aunt do that already... at least she was not trying to be hurtful.
" Don’t you have something better to do.. I heard they were having a sale on brains down at the mall..." I said, hating that was the only comeback I could come up with.
She turned and seemed to be not even listening to me. From her designer jeans to the Gucci bag she proudly held in one hand like a trophy on Oscar night... Tammy Lee had not changed one little bit.
" Well, I have to go back in, my date I have brought withe me, who happens to be a business graduate from Yale... he might be a little scared of our ‘pedestrian’ relatives by now." She smirked and started to saunter away. " Ta, ta!"
Tammy Lee started to leave with a large smirk on her face, swinging her Gucci bag like it was made out of gold. I looked over at Libby and shook my head, as that girl vanished back into the house thankfully.
" Somebody needs to do something to that girl...." I said, looking at my thin frame. " I’m thinking a speeding car and her body being used as a speed bump... over and over again!"
" I could think up quite a few little things I want to do to that girl." Said Libby, eyeing where the girl had been standing. " Most of them are against the law though.
" If you do dream something up, could you make it be extremely painful, while your at it?" I quipped back, still irked at Tammy Lee for her attitude.
" Yes... Yes I could." Said the girl right back, smirking.
We laughed and looked at one another, it was as if we had connected even more right then from sharing our mutual hatred for Tammy Lee. It was then that I noticed just how much Libby and I were alike now. Her way with humour, our exactly the same sarcastic wit and even to the way we were seemingly thinking alike. It was right then, that I found that I could not help but feel a strange sense pulling me to be closer than ever with her.
I looked at the girl that was once my childhood bully for a long few moments, tracing her face visually without having her knowing that I was. It was almost if I was looking at Libby for the very first time..noticing just how physically she was so beautiful, emotionally so solid and clearly mentally changed from what she was. Now older, she was still tough as nails and mean as a rattlesnake, yet it was very obvious that Libby had came a long way from that time. That part of her was dead.
Libby was so different than what she had been. She seemed so calm... in control yet still was held on to that razor sharp humour she had made a trademark out of over the years. I was now starting to really sense that there was another part of her... a part that I could not see or even explain what it was I was sensing, but whatever it was that I felt was there... I was needing to feel it. It was the strangest thing in the world.. It was almost as if I was being attracted to this ‘new and improved’ version of Libby.
I stopped myself right there, I had figured out what it was that I was feeling ever since we met back up as she arrived. I was attracted to Libby, and I knew that it was something way deeper than just being a Cousin.
" What the fuck am I thinking?" I posed to myself, I was now horrified that I was even thinking like this.
Thankfully, my mother called for us to come and greet the next wave of people that were to use out home as a free hotel. I could just let that move my mind away from whatever was going on to me... thinking it was just a normal thing I was feeling, and it would just go away after awhile.