The next morning came all too quickly. I woke up as the alarm went off and managed to turn it off before any of the morning news had a chance to ruin a perfectly good day. Breakfast was leftovers, a quick set of exercises, and I was ready to face the conundrum that called itself the world. First up, my client. I didn’t really want to talk to her, but I owed her at least the courtesy of a reply. My day was 100% so far – she was out. Or just didn’t answer the phone this early. I told her I’d be there with bells on, and a report. That gave me useful occupation for an hour or so, typing up what I had (and hadn’t) learned, and leaving out any useful information, which I always do in case my clients feel like doing a run-around on me. Call me paranoid. When I had completed the report, I checked the time and decided it was late enough to call Kaoru and set up an appointment. I wondered what rabbit hole I’d fall down today and idly whistled "I’m Late" from the Disney version while the phone rang. A sleepy voice answered, very young. I asked for Kaoru and the voice asked me to hold. It was a long time before an older, male voice picked up on the line. I introduced myself and mentioned that he had called me yesterday. His voice was male, but rather young sounding to be a professor of anything. There was a slight note of hesitation in his voice as we set up a meeting. I wondered if he was as young as he sounded. We rang off with polite words and empty promises. I yawned and stretched and decided to treat myself to a new suit, or at least jacket, today. My account bulged with not-yet-earned gains and I deserved something spiffy. Maybe two things. I slipped on my shoes and noticed how thin they looked. Maybe shoes too – did they count as proper expense? I grinned and decided that even if my client couldn’t afford it, I deserved new shoes. Feeling like today was a good day, I left the apartment humming to myself. Shopping in the morning is always weird. Everyone looks at me funny, like I should be somewhere else. With almost everyone at work, or carting babies around, I guess I do stand out a bit. A few old folks were on the streets too and I tipped the hat I don’t wear at them and greeted them. Some of the men smiled, most of the ladies did, a few scowled at me, wondering what I wanted. I walked to my favorite clothes store and let the sales help deck me out in a silk jacket and pants, new shirt. Not bad, I thought, as I checked myself out in the mirror. I wanted to wear the suit home, but decided not to risk it getting dirty before tonight. Next stop shoes. That was a little harder. Fashion is a harsh master and I had a difficult time finding the right kind of shoes. But when I was done, I knew I’d be the shining star at dinner that night. Entirely pleased with myself, I grabbed a light lunch, then headed for the university. I was due to speak with one Kaoru Miki and I couldn’t wait. Kaoru wasn’t at all what I expected. I guess I expected someone more aesthete looking, more hunched shoulders and peering eyes over thick spectacles. Kaoru was not terribly tall, but lean, athletic and fit. His frame moved like a well-oiled machine and it was lovely just watching him pace up and down his office. He talked a bit about his life at Ohtori, the fencing team. His name kept ringing a bell and just about the time he mentioned playing the piano I remembered where I had heard it. When I was younger there had been a popular song he wrote and recorded. It was overplayed on all the stations and everyone got sick of it. As fast as it had come, it was gone. I wondered if he ever played it anymore. I realized he had stopped talking and was looking at me quizzically. I decided to take a different tack with him than I had with the Kiryuu’s. "Professor Kaoru," I began with a pleasant smile, "do you remember a Himemiya Anshi from school?" I expected a reaction, but not the one I got. The Professor, whose lithe frame had not been still since I had entered, froze. His complexion went white, then a sickly green. He looked like he was going to pass out. I stood to help him, but as if he was released from a spell, the blood returned to his face and he waved me away. He sat down heavily on the edge of his desk and I retreated to my chair. "I’m sorry," he passed a hand over his face. His voice was thin and shaky. "That name. When you said it, I felt so…" he shook his head and stared off into the distance. I wondered if I had just done something very, very stupid. I was about to apologize when he looked up at me with blazing blue eyes. "I do remember her, you know." His voice was intense. "We weren’t supposed to. Everyone else forgot, just like the time the Black Rose came." He had lost me after the first sentence, but I was unwilling to stop him. The light in his eyes flashed, he looked half mad with something I couldn’t place. I could feel my legs tense beneath me in preparation for something. "After it was all over, we felt so…at a loss. None of us knew what to do. But there were classes, and clubs and we all just went back to them, pretending they had never been, never existed. The letters stopped, of course, but we were still the Student Council and we all acted like it meant something. But she was gone…gone…" His voice grew faint and I sprang up again, just in time to catch him as he fainted. I called the department receptionist and found some spirits in his liquor cabinet. They looked untouched, so I broke a seal and poured a glass of something or other. He was stirring on the ground and I lifted him and helped him sip the drink. He coughed and spluttered, but that seemed to make him feel better. When I sat back, the receptionist came in and said she had called the campus EMT squad and that they would be here in a few minutes. Kaoru protested, but I insisted. The secretary left and he looked at me strangely. I could see him as a young boy, from a photo in the file. Weary, almost sad eyes, so serious in that uniform. I wondered what burdens it had placed upon him. "I have to tell you, " he laughed self-deprecatingly, "The EMTs won’t find anything – it only happens when I try to remember." "Try to remember what?" I asked. "What Utena looked like." And he lay back on the floor and closed his eyes. A moment passed and then he spoke again. "I liked her a great deal. She was real. Very down to earth. And she was a good friend. To me and to Anshi. Anshi…" he sighed deeply. Still lying on the floor. "I loved Anshi you know." I didn’t. "Tell me about her. About Anshi." I prompted. "I can’t. It’s all blurred. The only things I can remember are shaved ice and math and the piano. It’s all blurred. And every time I think of her, I try to see Utena – and this happens." His voice was thick and I tried not to see the tears at the corner of his closed eyes. I dug into my pocket and found the photo. "Why don’t you look at this?" I held it out and he slowly sat up. Taking it from my hand he looked at it for a long time. In perfect silence he stared like a man redeemed. I felt my throat close at the look on his face. It was rapture. He held it out for me to take back. "Thank you. Thank you." His hand shook, so I took the picture quickly. "I can already feel it fading, but thank you for letting me see them again." He lay back down, groaning with the effort. "I know we’re not supposed to remember. But it was nice to see them again." And he passed out. I checked his pulse at his wrist and throat. His heartbeat and breathing were steady, so I sat there holding his hand until the med squad arrived. The put him on the stretcher and asked me questions. I told him that it was probably blood sugar or something and they let me go. When I arrived home, I felt drained. This was all so confusing. What on earth could possibly make people forget someone so completely? Why? Who was my client and why did one person hate her so much, while a man who called that woman "friend" loved her? I spent the rest of the afternoon doing regular office chores. Calling people back, sending out invoices - and typing up the rest of the report. I stared at the monitor for a long time. What the hell could I say about that interview that wouldn’t make me sound nuts? The finished product wasn’t satisfactory, but it would do. ------------------------------------------------------------ Glossary: Diet: The administrative body of Japan, and the building in which it meets. Prounounced "Dee-et." Obatarian: From the word "oba" or older woman and "batallion." It refers to the many older women who seemingly rule the streets during the day and are frequently rude or pushy. NPA: The National Police Association. The administrative body for all Japanese local police forces. Other than in Tokyo and Hakkaido, the NPA is the central authority for all local police forces. Ya-chan: A slang term for gangster. It is considered to be a very bad idea in Japan to say the word "yakuza" or even mention that someone looks like one.
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