The Biggest Choice of My Life

a Sailor Moon fanfiction by The Blue Esper

Authors note:  I just wrote this story as a spur of the moment and it is 
also my first story.

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	There she is, just standing there, radiating in a beauty.  Her soft, 
pink hair flowing in the wind as she gently runs down the hill to try and 
catch her hat.  This scene before me reminds me of when we met, only 
things are very different now, though.  I gently place my hand in my 
pocket for reassurance as to what I was about to do, feeling the velvet-
covered box within my fingers I breathe gently. Slowly standing up, I 
leave the basket and picnic mat we placed and run off to catch the hat 
she just can't reach.  Gently reaching, our hands make contact with each 
other instead of the summer hat; we both just give a little giggle at 
this motion, we both being what we are now, my beautiful princess and I.  
Again a reach for the hat and pass it to my friend, wait no lover is more 
appropriate.  I gently reach for her hat again and pull it from its hold 
in the breeze.  Brining it down to her face and slowly placing it on her 
head, waiting for her to lift her face and allow me to gaze at her beauty.  
"Odango-chan" I gently gasp as she does as I wish, just gazing into each 
others eyes, I wonder, How did I ever receive such beautiful girl, no 
woman.  We take each other's hand and slowly walk back up the hill to our 
picnic spot, we were no longer just 'good-friends' and I was going to do 
something that would affect us both.  Gently guiding her down into her 
seating spot, I place myself next to her.  I take her hand, just gazing 
into her beautiful eyes; I gently reach into the pocket, which contained 
the velvet box.  Brining it out and moving it to her face, I try to speak, 
but my voice just wouldn't follow.  I try again and it doesn't follow 
suite, she doesn't deserve someone this nervous, I think as I let go of 
her hand and turn away. "What's wrong?"  She says, in a gentle voice 
almost killing me, I turn back around and try to speak to her, but can't.  
Maybe everyone who takes this step is nervous, I don't really know, I 
never really had someone to go to in my time of need, except to woman 
before me, yet I wasn't able to turn to her about this.  I stand up and 
say the only thing I could, "I'm sorry, but I don't deserve someone as 
good as you", I feel my stomach turn as I spoke, I run away from her, how 
could I do this to her?  I turn back to look at her once more, only to 
see what I had done to her, why was I doing this?

	Darkness, that's all I was good for, staring at my ceiling in my 
bedroom.  I remember back then, no one expecting Chibi-Usa would choose 
me over Helios, she had two lovers dearly wanting to be with her for all 
eternity and she chose me, now I have just destroyed all that we had.  
Now that I think, maybe she should have chosen Helios, he was a prince 
and would never be this nervous. I fear what people will say, even worse, 
how they will treat me now.  I hear a gentle sound on the door to my room, 
not wanting to see anyone I just turn over.  But maybe I should have 
locked my door, as Haruka-papa walks into the room, followed by Michiru-
mama and Setsuna, who really scares me, is Setsuna though.  I have always 
known Setsuna thought of Chibi-Usa as a daughter as she was a part of 
Mamoru and Setsuna loved Endymion before, but new it was never possible, 
so maybe she'll understand what I am going through.  "What is the matter 
Hime-chan?"  Oh like you don't know, I think as I'm asked a question I 
cannot answer.  I just lie there, motionless, looking away from the three 
who entered my room.  Suddenly there is more weight applied to the 
opposite side of the bed, I don't want to look, yet I want to know whom 
it is?  "Hotaru, please tell us what happened between you and Small Lady" 
She speaks gently, rubbing my shoulder.  I quickly motion for her to move 
her hand by pushing it from me, she wanted to know why, but I couldn't 
tell her, because I desired the same answer.  The weight lifted from my 
bed and all I heard afterwards was my door open and close again.  What 
have I done with my life?  Have I ruined everything I had?

	Three days have passed, and I finally have the courage to leave my 
room, gently walking down the steps, awaiting another joke from Haruka-
papa.  But I reached the bottom of the steps and all I heard was silence, 
maybe they didn't care about me anymore?  No that is silly, as just as I 
made a step into the living room Setsuna-mama made a grab for me, holding 
me tight in her grasp.  "Hime-chan, we need to talk" she says to me, 
causing me to feel gut wrenched, wishing I never left my room, "Don't 
worry, I felt we should be alone for this and so I asked Haruka and 
Michiru to leave for the moment".  She gently guides me into the kitchen, 
as it was more quite there.  Just sitting down, I wait for the inevitable 
question Setsuna is going to ask me.  "So, how is your homework, keeping 
up in class lately?"  Her question confuses me, but from the nervousness 
I had, all I can do is giggle.  I look at Setsuna-mama, gently smile down 
at me; I know she is the senshi of time and knows what has happened, so I 
know she is only trying to help.  "I haven't been to school for a while" 
I reply to her 'question', I really want to tell someone, but I can't, it 
was like, when I tried to...  "Why's that?  What kept you from going to 
school?"  She asks me.  Suddenly I feel a full urge of strength suddenly 
build up within me at what I realized.  "It's because, I tried to tell 
Odango-chan something, but couldn't and I felt, I felt...I've got to go!" 
I then knew what I had to do; I slowly stand up and run to the front door, 
looking back at Setsuna, seeing a smile on her face, showing me that I am 
doing the right thing.  I leave the house bound for my next destination, 
a place where everything is almost eternal.

	"Taru-chan?" I see the pink haired girl before me, tears welling up 
in her eyes, at this moment I believe nothing can stand in my way of what 
I am to do, for both of us.  I slowly walk up to her, the whole world 
seeming to get warmer as every step I make puts me closer to her.  
Stopping just a few feet away from her, I see her more clearly, her 
beautiful face now stained with the tears I gave her, her appearance, 
once exquisite and perfect, now a wreck and a mess.  I lower my face in 
shame, "Chibi-Usa, I apologize for what I have done to you, you mean 
everything to me, I didn't want to hurt you, I...I" I lift my face to see 
hers, a confused look on her face, "I love you" I say, her face now 
lightening at my words, seeing her reaction, I want to be by her side 
even more now.  Without consciously acting I suddenly start racing to 
reach her, she doing the same in kind, and within a moment we finally 
reach other and embrace.  'I'm sorry' is all I can say to her.  After a 
while of gazing at each other, Chibi-Usa asks me 'the question' I was 
dreading anyone to ask me, "What happened?"  I slowly take her hand into 
mine and gaze into her eyes again, "I was going to ask you something, but 
I couldn't and I misinterpreted my feelings" I look away from her because 
of what I had said, finally admitting what I had kept trapped inside.  
"Well, what were you going to ask?"  Her voice, cheerful and fluent, 
showing that must have forgiven me, I am so lucky to have her.  Looking 
at her, the gleam in her face, I knew the perfect time had came up again, 
reaching in my pocket for the box I had never removed, I take it and out 
hold it to her, my mouth dry and a feeling of nervousness all over me, I 
open my mouth, "Chibi-Usa, I love you so much and after everything we 
have been through, I have only one thing to say."  I open the lid of the 
box to expose the silver ring, with gently golden crescent moons dancing 
all over it and an amethyst stone in the top, to show that I feel perfect 
when she is all around me.  "Will you marry me?"  I stand there just 
looking at her, looking at her turn her face from me.  "Taru-chan, I love 
you to, but..." Than was probably the worst hit I had ever received in my 
life, the 'but' she gave me spiraled around my head, maybe she didn't 
love me as much as I wished.  "I wanted to propose to you, YES I WILL 
MARRY YOU" My world was rocked from side to side at her words, a HUGE 
weight lifted from my chest, allowing me to breath again.  I gently take 
the ring from its box, to place it on her finger, but she quickly removes 
her hand from my hold.  "Wait" she says to me, as she also takes out a 
box, opening it to reveal a gold ring, with a joint crescent moon and the 
symbol of Saturn entwined.  "Will you marry me?" all I can do is laugh at 
this moment, she DID feel the same way about me, I answer the only way I 
can, "YES", we both gently exchange our rings, and hug each other softly 
and passionately.  "This will be a shock to everyone, wont it, my Odago-
chan" I say, putting an emphasis on 'my'.  "No, more crazy things have 
happened, it's not like people won't have expected it anyway" she says 
gazing into my eyes, I gently place my hand on top of hers, allowing out 
rings to be seen side by side.  "Well, I don't care what anyone says, as 
long as I'm with you".


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