Hotaru's Secret
"Ten to three, ten more minutes closer to freedom." Hotaru sighed happily. It
was the last day of school and Hotaru couldn't wait to get home. School was never her
favorite thing. Even though she had a normal life like the rest of the sailor soldiers, her
life could never be anything like normal. The attacks she used to have when she had
first met the other soldiers had come back. She thought it was always because she was
torn between the two forces trapped inside her body, but now there was no reason for her
attacks.
'I'm just a freak like always' she thought to herself. At least that’s what the kids
at school told her. She had no friends at her school; she really didn't want to be friends
with people like them. She thought things would be different after she had become sailor
Saturn but nothing had changed.
'No, that’s not all true, one this has changed' she thought again. She opened her
wallet and saw the picture she had inside it. It made her smile, which was something
most people never saw. It wasn't an old picture, but the date the picture was taken
seemed like it had been years ago. But no matter how old it was, its value to her heart
would never change. She stared at the picture and thought back to when it was taken. It
had been the happiest day of her life, one she would never forget. Suddenly her mind
shot back to reality as the last bell rang and the students around her got up to leave. Hotaru put the picture away and stood up. No sooner has she stood up when a
hand grabbed her shoulder and forced her back in her seat. Hotaru looked up scared to a
girl who was known for causing a lot of fights in her school. She was a head taller then
Hotaru but was very beautiful, at least that’s what most guys thought. She had blond
curly hair that ended to her shoulders and dark green eyes.
"Where do you think your going freak?" the girl asked tightening her hold on
Hotaru's shoulder.
"Wh…What do you want Kerri?" Hotaru whispered.
"Shut up! I saw you looking at my boyfriend slut. Stay away from him or I'll
cripple your worthless ass!" Kerri yelled. She turned her head to see if the two of them
were alone and when she saw that they were she backhanded Hotaru across the face.
Hotaru fell out of her chair and took her school bag with her, knocking out the things
she had in it. "Understand?" Kerri said in a low voice. Hotaru was on her hands and
knees and only nodded to the question. "Good. See you next year freak." Kerri said as
she walked out of the empty classroom.
Hotaru was starting to cry softly to herself as she picked up the things that had
fallen out of her bag. 'The more things change, the more the remain the same…'
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'At least its over know, I don't have to go back for a long time.' Hotaru though to
herself on her way home. Her cheek was red and so were her eyes. 'I just hope I get
home in one piece, and once I do I'm running upstairs to my room and locking the door!'
Hotaru thought again kicking a rock in front of her. 'But I know that won't change
anything, I just hope my days get better.' As Hotaru was walking she heard a stick break
behind her but before she could turn around someone covered her eyes with their hands
from behind her. Hotaru gasped, scared that it might have been Kerri again.
"Guess who!" a small voice said behind her. Hotaru sighed, as she knew who it
was and smiled.
"Is it a cute girl with short pink hair done up in a odd style?" Hotaru asked,
blushing when she heard herself talk.
"No, just little old me." Chibiusa said uncovering her eyes and stepping in front
of Hotaru. "Hotaru are you ok? Your face is red and so are your eyes? Is everything
alright?" Chibiusa asked with concern in her voice for her dear friend.
Hotaru covered her cheek and said, "I'm fine, I always am aren't I?" That was
all Chibiusa need to hear.
"You can't lie to me Miss Hotaru Tomoe, I'm your best friend and I know when
you're hiding something." Chibiusa said acting as if she knew Hotaru like a book, which
she almost did. And almost was just how Hotaru wanted it.
Hotaru only smiled, "I'm fine really Chibiusa, you don't need to worry about
me."
Chibiusa gave Hotaru a serious look and said back, "What kind of a friend
would I be if I didn't worry?"
Hotaru sighed and asked, "Would you walk me home please Chibiusa? I mean
if you're not busy." Chibiusa smiled and took Hotaru's hand.
"Of course I will. Is it ok with you if I stay a little while? Usagi is cooking again
today and I'm scared to go home." Hotaru giggled and nodded.
"I would love to have you over." The two girls smiled to one another and made
there way to Hotaru's house.
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"Please, make yourself at home. Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama won't be home till
late because I think they were going to try and go out on a date. And Setsuna-mama has
been really busy lately so I don’t even think she'll come home." Hotaru said taking her
shoes off.
"You sure they won't mind?" Chibiusa asked setting her bags down.
"I'm sure, why would they mind?" Hotaru asked walking into the kitchen.
"Would you like something to drink?" Hotaru asked.
"No that’s ok, do you mind if I put my bags in your room?" Chibiusa asked
back.
"No go ahead, I have to check on dinner so I'll be up in a minute." Hotaru said.
Chibiusa took her bags and ran upstairs. She went to the end of the hallway and opened
the door to Hotaru's room. As soon as the door opened up she caught the scent of
Jasmine in the room. Hotaru had two dark emerald green candles lit. Hotaru's room was
always dark if not for the lamps and few scented candles she had.
Chibiusa always loved being in Hotaru's room, it was so, romantic. But it was
also dark, like Hotaru was sometimes. That thought made Chibiusa frown, she knew that
recently Hotaru had been acting sadder and sadder but would always try and hide it
when she was around. Chibiusa sat down on Hotaru's bed and let she let herself fall
back. Hotaru had a feather bed and it was always very comfortable, like a cloud. She
turned and noticed something, a large black leather book on Hotaru's desk. It had a
purple ribbon in the middle. Chibiusa knew she shouldn't have looked in it but she
couldn’t stop her curiosity. She opened the book and read what was inside.
'Oh my god this is Hotaru's diary! Oh my…no wonder she's been so sad!'
Chibiusa thought to herself. Hotaru had never told her about her attacks coming back or
that nothing in her social life had changed. What made Chibiusa really upset was the
line she read at the end; 'I was born a freak, and I'll die a freak.' Chibiusa heard
footsteps coming up to the room and quickly put the book back. Hotaru walked in her
room and noticed the look on Chibiusa's face.
"What's wrong?" she asked seeing that Chibiusa was upset.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Chibiusa asked. Hotaru looked at Chibiusa for a
moment then noticed her dairy was behind her.
"What are you talking about?" Hotaru asked, although she had a good idea
what Chibiusa was talking about.
"I'm talking about your attacks coming back! And that you've been getting beat
up at school! I take it that it happened again." Chibiusa said in an angry tone, pointing
to Hotaru's still sore cheek.
Hotaru was shocked that she knew all that and felt tears building up in her
eyes. 'Oh my god, she read it! She must know what I wrote about her then!' "Chibiusa…I'm sorry I…" Hotaru couldn't think of words to say, she thought
Chibiusa would hate her forever now that she knew Hotaru's secret.
"And I wish you wouldn't think like that, it's wrong Hotaru! You know it is."
Rini said, talking about how Hotaru thought she was a freak. Hotaru couldn't believe
what Chibiusa had said and started to breakdown.
"I know its wrong, I'm so sorry!" Hotaru cried thinking she was talking about
her secret. Tears were sliding down her face and finally Hotaru ran out of her room.
Chibiusa didn't know why Hotaru had acted so serious over what she said. But she didn't
read all of Hotaru's diary, at least not the part about her. Chibiusa ran after Hotaru and
found her crying in her parent's bedroom.
"Hotaru? I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cry. I had no idea you take it that
seriously." Chibiusa said behind Hotaru.
"I knew you would be angry with me, I know thinking such things are wrong
and I know you must hate me for what I wrote about you. Its just that you…" Hotaru
couldn't finish her sentence. Chibiusa moved in front of her and knelled down next to
her.
"What did you write about me?" she asked. Hotaru looked up to her in shock.
'Oh my god she doesn't know?!' Hotaru thought. Hotaru was even more scared
now. Her secret had not been found out by the one person that it had to do with, but now
her mistake would force that secret out.
"Hotaru? What did you write about me?" Rini asked again. Hotaru couldn't
bring herself to say it.
"Please Chibiusa, I don't want to talk about it. It was nothing. I just need to get
some rest." Hotaru said as she tried to leave. Chibiusa grabbed her arm and stopped her.
"Please Hotaru, if something is bothering you I want to know what it is. I'm
your best friend aren't I? Please let me help you!" Chibiusa said now getting frustrated
with her.
"Chibiusa please!" Hotaru yelled. Chibiusa let her arm go and backed off in
shock. She had not expected to hear Hotaru yell at her. Hotaru began to cry again when
she realized she had yell at her best friend for only trying to help her. "Please, I just
want to get some rest now. I don't want to talk about it anymore." Hotaru said softly,
trying to act calmer.
Chibiusa just nodded, afraid to say anymore. "I'm sorry, I'll get my bag and go
back home, I didn't mean to upset you." Chibiusa said, leaving before Hotaru could say
anything else. She ran back to Hotaru's room and grabbed her bag, unknowingly
knocking Hotaru's dairy in an open pocket in her bag. She took the bag in her arm and
left. She was about to leave when Hotaru stopped her.
"Chibiusa, I'm sorry for raising my voice. You were right; I did get into another
fight in school today. My days only seem to get harder as they go by. Now I just want to
rest for awhile. I appreciate that you want to help me, but there are something's that a
friend just can't help someone with. I'm really sorry I yelled at you." Hotaru said bowing
her head.
Chibiusa only nodded and put on a fake smile. "It's ok, I know you had a hard
day. I'll leave you alone now." Chibiusa said quickly. She left just as fast, not waiting to
say goodbye to Hotaru. Hotaru wanted to stop her before a sharp pain hit her chest and
made her collapse. She was having another one of her attacks. She grabbed her chest,
struggling to breathe. This attack was the worst one she had ever had.
"Chibiusa…" Hotaru tried to yell out, but it came only in a whisper. Hotaru was
scared now and thought for sure that she was going to die, the pain she was in was so
great that for a moment she wanted to die if it meant ending this pain. Tears were
building up in Hotaru's eyes and suddenly everything went black. 'I'm dead' was Hotaru's
last thought; not something you want to take with you into the darkness.
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Colors. Dark and cold colors. It felt like being in a tomb almost. But there was a
breeze? Tombs don't have a breeze, do they? That’s what Hotaru asked herself when she
opened her eyes. Her vision was blurred and she couldn't tell where she was or if she
was alone. She tried to talk but couldn't.
'I'm dead…' Hotaru though to herself again. Suddenly she felt something warm
take her hand. She closed her eyes and opened them again to clear her vision. What she
saw would have made her cry. She wasn't dead at all, she was in her room laying on top
of her bed with what Hotaru thought for sure could only have been an angel.
"Chibiusa…" Hotaru whispered after she licked her dry and cracked lips. How
long had she been out? When she spoke the name of the person sitting next to her bed
the grip on her hand tighten.
"Shh Hotaru, don't try and talk. You've been unconsciousness for three days
now. The doctors thought you were in a coma and you would never wake up. But I told
them they were wrong, I made them go away and told the others I would stay with you
until you woke up." Chibiusa had tears in her red eyes and after Hotaru's vision cleared
more she could see Chibiusa's cheeks were tear stained.
'She stayed her with me? All that time, for me?' Hotaru though that maybe she
really did die, why would anyone want to stay with her when everyone else thought she
was with death.
Chibiusa brushed some hair off Hotaru's face and said, "Are you hungry
Hotaru? Can I get you anything?" Hotaru only shook her head. She was tired but she
didn't have the strength to eat or to even sleep. Plus if what Chibiusa said was true,
which she knew it was when she saw a plate with food half eaten on her desk and a
blanket on Chibiusa's lap, then Hotaru wouldn't burden her any further. Chibiusa smiled
at Hotaru and said, "Don't worry about it, I'll get something right now." Chibiusa got up
and pulled the blanket that was covering Hotaru up more and she tucked some of the
blanket under Hotaru's feet.
"Promise me you'll be awake when I come back ok?" Hotaru would have cried
right there if she hadn't been struggling to hold back her tears. Hotaru nodded. "Thank
you Tara-chan, I'll be back really soon." Chibiusa said. She walked out of Hotaru's room
and closed the door behind her, forgetting what she had just called Hotaru. Hotaru stared
at the door in shock, she wondered if that had been all a dream.
'If that was just another of my dying dreams, I pray I die with this dream so I
may never leave it.'
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Night had come; Hotaru had just fallen asleep. Chibiusa had made sure that Hotaru
didn't get out of bed with out her knowing. She wouldn't let anyone else in the room
beside her and told the others, "I just need to be alone with her." Chibiusa sat back in an
old rocking chair that Hotaru had. She remembered her telling Chibiusa that it was her
mother's. She closed her eyes and smiled.
'Thank God you woke up Tara-chan. Thank you God so much.' Chibiusa took a
book from her backpack and opened it to a bookmarked page. She smiled joyfully and
read the same pages she had been reading for those three days she stayed with Hotaru:
June 25, 1999
The day I opened my eyes
Dear diary,
God knows how many lives I've ruined, God knows how many lives I'll lived, but for
the first time in all those lives, my eyes have opened. All this time I kept fooling myself
thinking this was wrong or that I was wrong myself. I have given this a lot of thought
and I'm sure with all my heart that this is anything but wrong.
I kissed someone for the first time in my life. Not a kiss on the cheek but a real
kiss on the lips. Oh it was the sweetest feeling I could ever feel. I can't think of words to
describe it but pure serenity would be the only thing that comes close to it. I know that I
love this person, I have loved this person for a long time. No, I take that back, love is to
small a word to describe how I feel about this person. To think I never saw it makes
wonder how I can see anything. But now I worry about what this person will think.
Will they feel the same? I think they won't. No, not for me. I am the last person
to be blessed by something wonderful as true love. They could not love me because I am
different. Even more now then before. I fear if I ever tell them about my true feelings
that they will laugh or even worse, abandon me and think me a freak when they are the
only soul on this planet that might just think I am normal.
Its funny, writing that right now, I don't believe I am or ever well be normal. I
was born with this curse and I'll die with it, then take it with me to my next life. So I
decided not to tell this person I love them, nor that I stole a kiss from them in their
sleep. I suppose they may never know how I feel, even though I scream the words "I love
you" from my heart; they will never hear them.
Just like I will never hear those words back from their lips. Their sweet lips. I
would give anything to kiss their lips again, to have them hold me in their arms at night
and in day. To look into their eyes and know that they really love me in all the ways a
human can be loved. If it were possible for me then I would sell my soul to have them
forever.
But just like I said before, this person, this sweet and special person would
never love a mistake like me. They are far too good for me to have. For me to call my
own. But I hope and pray, beyond hope and prayers can go, that this person might
someday say the words I may never live to hear, "I love you Hotaru."
It has grown late now, I should go and sleep but that would only bring my days
closer to me, and so far for the last four weeks my days have given me only sadness and
more reasons to hold that knife to my wrist. If not for this person, I would have died
along ago. And this person, this person who God himself must have sent to be with me
is someone who I hope I never lose, someone how has become the only ray of light in
my dark world.
And that someone is Chibiusa…
Chibiusa blushed the whole time she read that special part in Hotaru's dairy. She
never had a clue that Hotaru felt like this about her. When she thought about it, they had
been spending more time with each other recently, and it was normally just the two of
them. Hotaru was very dear to Chibiusa; she was her first real friend sense she came
back to the past. Chibiusa smiled remembering the day they first met. Her hat had been
flown away in the park. And even though Hotaru didn't know Chibiusa at the time she
went after her hat and saved it from a creek. She wasn't even suppose to be running
because she was so weak but she still did it.
'Maybe she already knew?' Chibiusa though, holding the diary close to her like
she would hold a teddy bear. 'Do I feel the same?' she thought again. She turned to
Hotaru who was still sleeping soundly in bed. She was the only person Chibiusa knew
that didn't look peaceful when they slept. Hotaru didn't look like she was in pain, just
sad. Chibiusa put the book down on the desk and moved to the side of the bed. She lit
one of Hotaru's lamps and stood by the foot of the bed. Chibiusa smiled to Hotaru, her
face looked beautiful in the small amount of light the lamp gave out. Chibiusa bent over
and moved some of Hotaru's hair away from her face but didn't get back up. Chibiusa
was staring at Hotaru's face. There was something different about, something she had
never noticed before. Hotaru's face looked so pretty, even though she couldn't see her
eyes.
"You are important to me…" Chibiusa whispered. She felt her heart beginning
to beat faster as she licked her lips and took a deep breath. Chibiusa bent over a little
more and very gently gave Hotaru a kiss. Just like Hotaru had stole a kiss from her,
Chibiusa had just stole a kiss from Hotaru, and Chibiusa blushed greatly after it. But,
she did have a rather big smile on her face.
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Hotaru woke up early the morning after to the scent of pancakes. Hotaru sat up
in bed and looked around. Chibiusa was still asleep in her mother's rocking chair.
Hotaru blushed a little and thought how sweet Chibiusa was to stay with her all these
nights. Hotaru pushed the heavy blankets away and was surprised to see that she was
still in her school uniform.
'Eww. I need to change. No I need a shower first!' Hotaru though. They she
smelled pancakes. 'After I eat.' She tried to stand up but found that it was kind of hard.
Chibiusa heard Hotaru getting up and jumped out of her chair.
"Hotaru! You shouldn't be moving around like that! You might hurt yourself!"
Chibiusa said taking Hotaru's arm and helping her stand when she was about to fall.
Hotaru only blushed.
"Chibiusa, I'm fine really I am. I need to move around or I'll be stuck in that
bed. And I think I need to change these cloths." Hotaru said calmly, trying to fool her
pink hair friend. Chibiusa didn't buy it.
"Hold on, you can't just get up and walk away after being asleep for three days
straight. Please let me take care of you for now." Chibiusa pleaded. Hotaru didn't want
to agree with her but she was feeling a little too weak to argue.
"Alright…" Hotaru said sitting back in bed.
“Good!” Chibiusa said happily. “Now I tell you what, you can go ahead and
take a shower if you want, and then after that I’ll serve you breakfast in bed. Does that
sound good?” Chibiusa asked. Hotaru giggled and nodded.
“Your doing too much Chibiusa, you don’t have to be worrying yourself over
me like this.” As soon as Hotaru had finished her sentence Chibiusa pressed her finger
against Hotaru’s lips.
“Shh, you almost died if I had not gone back to talk more to you, I was scared I
would lose you Hotaru, so expect me to worry more about you for awhile. You’re a
precious person to me and I’m going to take care of you until I know your better.”
Chibiusa said looking into Hotaru’s eyes the whole time she was talking. ‘She has such
lovely eyes’ Chibiusa thought to herself.
Hotaru was shocked by Chibiusa and nodded to what she had said, blushing
badly. “Alright then, so you going to take your shower or do you want your food now?”
Chibiusa asked smiling happily knowing Hotaru was going to let her take care of her.
Hotaru was still blushing and thought, ‘Thank God I have you…’
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Hotaru walked out of the bathroom carrying her clothes with her. She had finished
taking her shower and felt a lot better now. She dressed herself in a black nightgown,
even though it was still early in the day but Chibiusa wanted her to dress comfortable. It
was nice knowing she had a friend that cared so much for her, but Hotaru never really
felt worthy of Chibiusa's friendship. She was nothing like Chibiusa or any of her friends.
She laughed a little to herself when she thought to herself that she was nothing like
anyone!
But if Chibiusa could hear her thoughts she would scold Hotaru for thinking
such foolish things. Chibiusa always said that out of all her friends Hotaru meant the
most to her because she was her first true friend. And she always said that Hotaru was
her special friend. Hotaru blushed remembering the first day Chibiusa said that to her. It
was when Chibiusa went to see her father, after Sailor Moon had saved Hotaru from the
silence. She was only a baby, but she clearly remembered Chibiusa holding her in her
arms and whispering, "Sweet Hotaru, I know you may not be able to understand me, but
I couldn't leave without saying good bye to you my special friend."
Hotaru blushed more and quickly pulled herself together before she entered her
room. She knew Chibiusa was in there and she didn't want to explain why she was
blushing. She opened the door and dropped the cloths she was holding to the floor in
surprise. Her room, dark as always, had every lamp she ever collected lit up. The room
had a beautiful glow to it and for a second Hotaru didn't know if she was in the right
room or not. She had never lit all of them before. She could smell something sweet in
the air as well.
"Jasmine," Chibiusa's voice said behind Hotaru. Hotaru turned around and saw
Chibiusa was dressed in a nurse's dress. Hotaru couldn't help but notice that it looked
little too tight on her from the waist up.
"What's this?" Hotaru asked.
"Just something to make you a little more comfortable. Come on lay down. I
changed the sheets on your bed too because I knew you wouldn't want to sleep in a
sweaty bed." Chibiusa said with her finger in the air pointing up like she knew what she
was talking about. Hotaru only sweat drop. She walked in and sat down on her bed,
Chibiusa had put on the dark purple silk sheets Hotaru had. Chibiusa grabbed Hotaru's
legs and lifted them up to the bed before Hotaru could stop her. " Haruka and Michiru
are out now, I told them I could take care of you by myself and they agreed so it's just
you and me." Chibiusa said.
Hotaru blushed and said, "Chibiusa this is all so very thoughtful of you but it's
all too much. You shouldn't have done all this for me. It must have took you all day."
Chibiusa giggled and said, "Hotaru I want to take care of you, making you relax
is one of the ways I take care of people. Plus I know you've had a hard couple of weeks
and I haven't been a good friend by not being there for you so this is the least I can do."
Hotaru blushed more and shook her head. "You’re a wonderful friend Chibiusa,
more then I should have, thank you so much for all that you've done. It really means a
lot to me."
Chibiusa bowed. "Your very welcome Tara-chan. And don't say such foolish
things about yourself."
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Hotaru lay peacefully in bed after she had finished eating the dinner Chibiusa had
brought her. She remembered what Usagi told her about Minako and Chibiusa dressing
up like nurses and taking care of her. It made Hotaru laugh, even more when Usagi told
her to watch out for that rice gruel they would bring her.
Just then Chibiusa walked in to Hotaru's room. She smiled to Hotaru and asked,
"Anything I can get you?"
Hotaru giggled and said, "No Chibiusa I'm quiet fine. You've already taken
such great care of me I can't thank you enough."
Chibiusa only nodded and asked in serious tone, "Hotaru, may I talk to you
about something?"
Hotaru could tell the change in her friend's tone and said, "Of course Chibiusa,
what is it?" Chibiusa walked to the bed and sat next to Hotaru.
"I know now. I know what you think about me." Hotaru turned to face Chibiusa
when she heard her say that and a feeling of fear ran down Hotaru's spine.
"What…what do you mean?" Hotaru asked.
Chibiusa took Hotaru's hand and said, "You know what I mean, I know what
you feel for me, that you're in love with me." Chibiusa's voice was heavy with emotion
and Hotaru was scared now that Chibiusa would hate her for knowing what she really
thought about her friend.
"Chibiusa…I…I know its wrong to think such things but…I can't help it."
Hotaru had tears in her eyes and jumped out of her bed and gave Chibiusa a hard look.
"I won't lie about it anymore, yes I do love you Chibiusa! I've loved you for a long time
because you’re a special person to me and you mean so much to me that I can't imagine
a life with out you." Hotaru yelled, tears running down her face. She was very scared
about what Chibiusa would say about this but she knew she had to say it. It was the right
thing to say.
"You make my days worth living, you've always been there for me when even
God himself abandoned me. When everyone thought I was just a cold-hearted killer you
were the only one that would stand beside me and protect me, even when I turned on all
of you, you still wouldn't give up on me. You saved my life; you saved my soul from the
darkness that would have swallowed me whole. You’re the light in my life, how could I
not fall in love with you?" Hotaru said before she fell to her knees crying. "I love you
and I know you must think I'm a freak now more then ever." Hotaru was breaking down
and Chibiusa went right to her and made Hotaru face her. The two girls looked into each
other's eyes for while, one seeing sadness and begging for forgiveness, the other seeing
only concern and what someone would have mistaken for love.
"Chibiusa, I…"
Hotaru never had the chance to finish her sentence. Chibiusa pulled Hotaru
toward her and pressed her lips against hers. Hotaru's eyes grew big with surprise and
shock; Chibiusa's eyes however were closed. Hotaru didn't know what to do, she wasn't
even breathing. Chibiusa put her arms around Hotaru's neck and Hotaru closed her eyes,
putting her arms around Chibiusa waist. The two girls relaxed and kissed each other for
what seemed to them like hours. Finally, Chibiusa broke the kiss. Both girls' cheeks
were red.
"When you collapsed at your door after I left I was so scared that I couldn't get
you to open your eyes, I prayed to God that you weren't going to die. I would have done
anything to make you open your eyes again. I would have traded my life for yours. And
then finally after help came, I thought to myself what would have happened if you had
died right there and then. I would have been lost without you. The thought of losing you
twice, no, three times was too much for me. I swear I was so scared I wouldn't leave your
room. I stayed by your bedside holding your hand hoping and waiting for you to open
your eyes again. All the while, I read more of your diary, and I realized I had felt the
same about you all the time. And when I thought I was going to lose you, I made myself
promise that when you woke up I wasn't going to lie to myself anymore. I wouldn't want
to leave your side and most importantly, I wanted to let you know I left the same way
about you." Chibiusa and Hotaru were both crying after Chibiusa's speech. Hotaru was
crying the worst and hid her face in Chibiusa's chest.
"Say it again please?" she asked.
Chibiusa held Hotaru tightly, as if she was going to fade away and whispered,
"I love you Hotaru."
Hotaru stayed in Chibiusa's arms crying for an hour, thinking of how
impossible it all seemed. How wrong it would seem that anyone would love a monster
like her. But Chibiusa never let her go and Hotaru knew inside her heart that she would
never let her go, just like she would never let Chibiusa go.
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Hours had past, maybe more? Hotaru didn't care. Both her and Chibiusa were lying
in her bed, Hotaru still in Chibiusa's arms. Her face was tear stained but she wasn't
crying anymore.
"What are you thinking Hotaru?" Chibiusa asked. Hotaru's back was toward
Chibiusa and she couldn't see her face but Chibiusa knew she was not all right.
Hotaru sighed and said, "I…I just still can't get over it I guess. I prayed so hard
that someday someone would treat me like a normal person, and then I met you. Then I
wished to fall in love with someone who would really love me back, not just say it, but
mean it in every way it can be meant. Like the person's heart would say I love you, not
their mouth. Then I began to realize just how important you were to me, and how much
you truly me to me."
Hotaru turned around and faced Chibiusa; the first thing she noticed where how
Chibiusa's eyes glowed in the light the lamps around them gave out. 'Beautiful.' Hotaru
thought to herself.
"Hotaru, why didn't you tell me this sooner? Why were you afraid to tell me?"
Chibiusa asked.
Hotaru laughed a little to the question and said, "What would you have thought
if one day I came up to you and said 'Chibiusa I'm in love with you'? Besides, I was so
sure you wouldn't feel the same way. I mean, I'm your best friend, at least I think I am
still, and plus I'm a girl, I was worried what you would think about that, not to mention
what everyone else would think. I didn't want to but you in that kind of situation. And
what could you love in a freak like me?" Chibiusa placed her hand on Hotaru's cheek
and put her forehead to Hotaru's.
"Don't say such foolish things Hotaru. Your not a freak, never have been and
never will be." Chibiusa said. She kissed Hotaru's forehead and continued, "I'll admit I
can understand why you didn't tell me. But I'm glad I found out. You’re a special person
to me Hotaru; you were my first real friend when I came to this time. You saved my hat
when you didn't even know me, and you knew you shouldn't had been running. I can
always trust you just like you can always trust me. So trust me when I say I do not care
what Usagi or anyone else would say about you and me. One of the things my mother
taught me was that love is love, love is unbiased and there is no wrong way to love
someone, and I love you Hotaru. You’re the reason why I came back to this time again."
Hotaru was hiding her face from Chibiusa's and could feel her eyes watering.
"But…I'm crazy." Hotaru whispered, not wanting Chibiusa to hear.
Chibiusa lifted Hotaru's face back up to hers and whispered back, "You’re not
crazy Tara-chan. Actually, from what I see right now, your beautiful." Chibiusa smiled a
loving smile to Hotaru and gave her a soft and gentle kiss. Hotaru felt her body stiffen to
the kiss but it didn't stop her from kissing back. Their kissed lasted for what seemed like
forever to them. Chibiusa broke the kiss from Hotaru's soft lips and started kissing her
cheeks and her forehead, everywhere on Hotaru's face. Hotaru started kissing Chibiusa
neck and made her way down. She stopped at Chibiusa's transformation brooch and
gave it a soft kiss; to her it felt like kissing Chibiusa's heart. Chibiusa put her hands on
Hotaru's cheeks and brought her face to hers.
"I love you Hotaru." she whispered.
Hotaru blushed deeply and whispered back, "I love you too Chibiusa."
Chibiusa smiled slyly and whispered again in Hotaru's ear, "Then, may I show
you just how much I love you?" Hotaru's face and her body got hot with those words and
all she could do was nod.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hotaru laid on her back under the black silk sheets of her queen size bed. She
was wearing a simple rose red nightgown with a black lace trim on the shoulders and at
the skirt. Her cheeks had a red glow to them as Chibiusa pulled some of the sheets away
and went into the bed. She was wearing a soft pink nightgown made out of silk. She
pulled the covers back up and embraced the other girl.
Hotaru's cheeks had brightened as she wrapped her arms around Chibiusa slim
waist. She was trembling slightly to being so close to the person who she had secretly
had been fantasizing about for so long. She looked into Chibiusa's ruby eyes and became
lost within them.
"Are you sure you're ok with this Tara-chan? You don't have to force yourself."
Chibiusa said in a gently whisper.
Hotaru pulled herself closer to Chibiusa and said weakly, "No, I've been
dreaming about this for so long. I never thought it was possible but now that it has truly
happened I want to be as close to you as possible." Hotaru put her hand on the back of
Chibiusa's head and gave her a passionate kiss.
To her it was like kissing a divine angel. Chibiusa's lips were soft like rose
petals and just as sweet. To Chibiusa, kissing Hotaru was like kissing a star; it was
nothing short of amazing. Their tongue's danced in their mouths and their fingers
locked together, never wanting to part, just like them. Chibiusa turned Hotaru over so
she was on top oh her. Their kiss deepened not only in length but also in feeling. Hotaru
began moaning softly as Chibiusa began giving her quick butterfly kisses to Hotaru's
sweet neck. Hotaru moaned louder, making Chibiusa more excited and said almost in a
plea, "Chibiusa, I love you."
Chibiusa blushed and responded with more kisses to Hotaru's neck and a
whisper, "I love you too Hotaru." Chibiusa pulled the shoulders of Hotaru's nightgown
down and pulled the soft garment off, exposing Hotaru's soft pale skin. Hotaru wasn't
wearing anything underneath the nightgown and felt her naked body turn red with
embarrassment.
"You really are a goddess aren’t you," Chibiusa said, winking to Hotaru. Hotaru
blushed more and pulled Chibiusa up to her, kissing her deeply and untying the garment
in the back that Chibiusa was wearing. When she pulled it off, she found that she wasn't
the only one that didn't wear anything underneath their nightgown. Hotaru laid
underneath Chibiusa and smiled to her.
Chibiusa smiled back and started to kiss Hotaru's chest. Chibiusa heard Hotaru
moan softly as she started to kiss Hotaru's breast. She could feel Hotaru's hand moving
up and down her back. Chibiusa took one of Hotaru's breasts in her mouth and sucked
gently on it, playing with the other one with her hand. Hotaru arched her back up
slightly, putting her leg between Chibiusa's as she started running her hands through
Chibiusa soft hair. She undid the odango's, letting Chibiusa's hair fall free down the
length of her back.
Chibiusa could feel Hotaru's leg between hers and started to move her hips
along the length of Hotaru's soft silky leg. She let Hotaru's breast go and started to kiss
her tummy. Hotaru giggled slightly to the feeling as she started to kiss the top of
Chibiusa head, taking in the scent of roses in her hair. Chibiusa smiled and brought her
face down lower. She spread Hotaru's legs apart and gave Hotaru a sly smile. Hotaru
didn’t know what Chibiusa was going to do until it was too late. Chibiusa bent her head
down and gently licked Hotaru's untouched flower. Hotaru let out a yell to the feeling of
Chibiusa wet tongue giving her pleasure that she never knew of.
“Chibiusa…" Hotaru moaned as she placed her hands on Chibiusa head, almost
pushing her head closer. Chibiusa responded to Hotaru's moans by taking all of Hotaru
in her mouth, licking and kissing her. Hotaru started to move her hips in the rhythm of
Chibiusa tongue, keeping her eyes closed and moaning louder and louder. Chibiusa was
enjoying hearing Hotaru moan and say her name repeatedly. She pulled Hotaru's lips
apart slightly and pushed a finger inside of her. Hotaru gave a loud yell as she started to
feel something inside of here building up.
"Chibiusa…don't stop." Hotaru panted.
"I won't, trust me." Chibiusa said as she pushed another finger inside of the
lavender haired girl. Hotaru arched her back as much as she could and finally it hit her.
Her first orgasm left like a shock of electricity running threw her body, stealing her
strength but giving her unimaginable pleasure.
"Oh my God, you must be an angel cause I think you just took me to heaven."
Hotaru said as she took deep breaths.
Chibiusa giggled and said, "I guess I was good." Hotaru sat up and nodded. "Now I want to return the favor." Hotaru said as she pulled Chibiusa into her
arms, kissing her passionately. Chibiusa was caught off guard by the kiss but soon came
over that. Hotaru moved behind Chibiusa and started kissing her shoulder blade and
neck while her hands wondered all over Chibiusa body.
Chibiusa moaned softly in Hotaru's ear and whispered, "Be gentle."
Hotaru kissed the back of Chibiusa ear and said, "With you, always princess."
Hotaru's hands grabbed Chibiusa breast and started to play with them, gently as
Chibiusa had requested. Chibiusa gave a small moan and took Hotaru's cheek in her
hand and turned her head to kiss her. As they kissed Hotaru's hands started to work
magic into Chibiusa as they started to glow in a soft purple light. She took Chibiusa
nipples between her fingers and gave a slight twist. Chibiusa started to moan louder,
saying Hotaru's name with each breath as Hotaru continued to pleasure her.
Hotaru turned to face Chibiusa and said, "Now like I said before, I'll return the
favor you gave me." She spread Chibiusa's legs apart, exposing the girl's wet and
untouched flower. Hotaru lifted Chibiusa's pussy to her mouth and took her all in.
Chibiusa let a short scream out when she left Hotaru's tongue washing over her sensitive
area and then let another one out when she felt it go in her.
"Oh Hotaru, oh my God don't stop, please don't stop." Chibi begged as she
pushed Hotaru's head closer to her. Hotaru pushed her tongue in as deep as she could,
enjoying the little Chibiusa pie she was having. Finally, Chibiusa couldn't take anymore
of the pleasure Hotaru was giving her and gave one last finally yell before her body
stiffened and her heart forgot to beat. Chibiusa collapsed on the bed panting for air.
Hotaru put her fingers inside of Chibiusa and took a taste of the pink haired
girl. She didn't know just how to describe it other then sweet and kinda of bitter. All and
all, her Chibiusa pie was good.
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Chibiusa finally started to breathe normally again and noticed Hotaru was gone. She
looked around the room but there was no sight of her. Suddenly the lights in the room
went off and a cold chill entered the room. Chibiusa was still naked and started
shivering.
"Hotaru? Where are you?" Suddenly out of no where Hotaru appeared, but as
Sailor Saturn. "Hotaru?" Chibiusa asked.
"I am Sailor Saturn, the soldier born to darkness and death. I was born alone,
and meant to die alone for I am the forbidden soldier who should never have been. But
now I live for a new reason now. Not to snuff out a worlds dying light, nor to walk the
path of ruin and silence, but to serve and protect the princess of the future Crystal
Tokyo, Small Lady Chibiusa. And I promise to serve, honor, protect, and love her for all
the days of my life, and the rest of all eternity." Sailor Saturn said bowing on one knee
to Chibiusa. Chibiusa could feel tears in her eyes and jumped off the bed and took
Saturn in her arms.
"Oh Hotaru I love you so much!"
Saturn put her arms around Chibiusa and said, "And I love you my princess,
more then the word love can even describe." With that the two girls shared a deep a
loving kiss that they would always remember for the rest of their lives and even after
that. Saturn quickly took Chibiusa in her arms and lifted her up, carrying her back into
the bed. She laid her down and got on top of her. She kissed her gently on the lips and
put her arms around Chibiusa. Chibiusa did the same and Saturn's fuku began to
disappear, leaving behind only purple ribbons around Hotaru's naked figure. The ribbons
seemed to go around Chibiusa as well, binding the two together.
Hotaru pushed herself on Chibiusa and moaned when her sex was rubbed up
against Chibiusa. Chibiusa pulled Hotaru into a deeper kiss as the two started to rub up
against each other. They turned around and switched places with each other, but always
would the ribbons keep them together, just like their newfound love would keep their
hearts and their souls together forever. Hotaru began to move her hips faster and harder,
making both her and Chibiusa pant harder and harder, each one saying the others name
over and over again until they both stopped when an explosion hit both of them at the
same time.
The two lovers came together, each one screaming "I love you," each one
holding on to the other tightly hoping nothing would pull them apart. Hotaru fell on top
of Chibiusa exhausted and tired. Chibiusa panted hard and was very tired herself.
Without saying a word, the couple fell asleep in each other's arms, the ribbons around
them still holding them together. But when they would wake, it would be their hearts
that would hold the two together for the rest of their lives.
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