Fallen from Grace (part 11 of 24)

a Sailor Moon fanfiction by BluestAngelDust

Back to Part 10
That evening, when Rei Hino walked through the door of her apartment, 
the aroma of food reached her nose. This was especially strange for her, 
like she'd walked into another dimension or something. Whenever she came 
home, the only things that greeted her were darkness and silence. The 
emptiness of her apartment usually forced her to leave again.

But tonight, it was different. There was a... warmth she felt when she 
entered. Her lights were on and the sound of music brought life to her 
lonely home.

As usual, Rei left her bag by the door and quickly rid herself of her 
jacket. Anticipation like she's never known before coursed through her 
veins. True, it was obvious who was responsible, yet there was no way 
she'd believe it until she saw it.

A petite figure was swaying her hips to the beat of the music while 
bustling around the kitchen. Shocked, Rei leaned against the wall, 
staring at the young woman, mesmerized.

- Crawling in my skin,

These wounds they will not heal.

Fear is how I fall,

Confusing what is real. -

Well, not exactly something one can dance or shake that pretty ass of 
hers to, but who cares. As long as Hotaru kept shaking it, that's all 
that mattered. She seemed so much like a normal girl, dancing while 
making dinner and humming to herself. It also helped that the song was 
by one of Rei's favorite bands.

- There is something inside me that pulls

Beneath the surface, consuming, confusing.

This lack of self control

I fear is never ending, controlling

I can't seem, to find myself again. -

And now Rei remembered why. It struck too close to home. It reminded her 
that she couldn't control herself, her lust. Who was she beneath the 
desire to bed one person after another? Was there anyone left under the 
lust at all?

They seemed to go hand in hand. You couldn't say the name 'Rei Hino' 
without think of her many lovers. And you couldn't think 'sleeping 
around' without a picture of her to accompany it. After stripping her of 
her reputation, there was nothing left to see.

- My walls are closing.

Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced,

That it's just too much pressure to take.

I've felt this way before, so insecure.-

Rei's hands gripped the handle of the refrigerator. Oh god, no. Please, 
not now.

Images of Usagi flashed through her mind. The innocence, the light and 
the love she gave so unconditionally. To the blonde, a person was not 
plain good or evil. Everyone deserved to be loved, to have someone care 
for them.

Even the insufferable bitch. Rei Hino knew she was a complete bitch in 
junior high. She took great pride in the reputation she built. She was 
perfect. She had the brains, the looks, the attitude, the confidence and 
even the money, thanks to her so-called father. As a teenager, she was 
untouchable. No one could approach her, they weren't worthy. At least 
not in their own eyes. People surrounded her day in and day out. Of 
course, she was in no short supple of friends.

But none of them had really been friends. They had been fans of hers. 
Fans of the image she created. So, wasn't it surprising when Usagi 
Tsukino came around?

She was the opposite of everything Rei was: a cry baby, bad student, 
loud, whiny, a push over and yes, a blonde. So, why shouldn't she have 
the only thing Rei Hino didn't have?

Love.

No, not just the love of others. She had plenty of that. Everyone loved 
the blonde. No one could resist her innocence. No one could ignore her 
light. They were like moths to a flame. And for once, Rei Hino became a 
follower.

And the result shocked her. For the first time, someone loved Rei Hino. 
Yes, someone loved her. Loved her despite her temper, cruel teasing, 
arrogance and even her pride. Usagi even told her once that she loved 
Rei BECAUSE of her faults. She had said they made her who she was. And 
who she was, was a person more than deserving of love.

With that, Rei Hino's shields cracked. Her walls came tumbling down. For 
the first time, someone was allowed into her heart. And what could she 
do but love the blonde back?

Well, it wasn't that simple in the beginning. Before Usagi's world 
shattering, or mask shattering, confession, the miko tormented her to no 
end. Hell, she even went out with Mamoru just to spite Usagi. She even 
tried to turn against Sailor Moon.

It was natural. It was her self-defense mechanism. You see, all of them 
had one. Each of the senshi.

Ami buried herself in her studies, computer and books, making herself 
undesirable to most people. Makoto kept them away by fighting- who would 
want to be friends with someone that can snap you in two? They were all 
touched and loved by Usagi. And they all loved the blonde in return.

Until Rei began to love her in a way deeper than friendship. It nearly 
drove her mad. And it only got worse after Mamoru was revealed to be 
Usagi's prince. Damn, shut down in two ways. First it was her boyfriend. 
Second, he was the one destined to be with the one she loved. Oh god, 
life bites.

But she continued to love Usagi. Then ChibiUsa appeared.

The cursed Moon brat. Well, case closed. It was one thing to know your 
beloved was destined to be with another, it was another to see proof.

In the form of a daughter.

There was no one that could understand how she felt. She was completely 
broken hearted.

But as always, she pieced herself together. True, she couldn't be the 
same, but nonetheless she forged on.

Then came "The Talk."

Usagi told the miko she knew of her love. But, as they both knew, it 
could never be. The blonde simply didn't love her that way, and would 
never love her that way.

Dear Mother Earth, that would have been the perfect time to open up and 
swallow her. But it didn't. And Rei was forced to continue living on.

"Rei?"

Hotaru's voice brought the miko from her thoughts.

- There is something inside me that pulls

Beneath the surface.

Confusing what is real. -

A whimper caused Hotaru to freeze. She was pretty sure she wasn't the 
one that whimpered. And the only other person that would be in the house 
was Rei.

After taking a deep breath, she turned. Please, she hoped the whimper 
wasn't because she thought her dancing was horrible!

One look at Rei banished that thought from her mind. Actually, it 
banished all thought from Hotaru's mind.

The woman stood at the refrigerator, her knuckles white from the death 
grip on the handle. Her brows were furrowed, something Rei always did 
when in deep thought. But it was her eyes that caused Hotaru to freeze.

Her lavender eyes were dark, a pained expression etched on her face. But 
they were twinkling at the same time... with unshed tears.

The motionless figure whimpered yet again.

Despite not knowing what was wrong, Hotaru knew she had to do something. 
First, snap her the hell out of her stupor.

Walking closer to Rei, a list of things to say raced through her mind. 
None, however, seemed appropriate. So, stick with what you know.

"Rei?"

Glazed eyes blinked several times as Hotaru saw the miko return. Slowly, 
Hotaru reached over and touched the other's cheek. Large eyes, shocked 
by the sudden touch, widened further when a single tear held on the tip 
of the younger girl's finger was brought to her attention.

'She doesn't even know she's crying.'

Rei quickly wiped away the tears, smiling in attempt to throw Hotaru 
off.

"What smells so good?"

Pink lips parted to speak when violet eyes caught sight of the pleading 
look in the eyes of her beloved. The question died as Hotaru stood and 
pulled Rei to her feet. The former turned, giving the other a chance to 
regain her composure. The miko smiled softly. Only Hotaru.

"I'm making fish soup."

At the mention of fish, the taller woman paled. Hotaru was a good cook 
when it came to noodles and rice. But was she capable of making 
something like fish soup?

"Try this."

A long, wooden spoon was held in front of the miko. Seeing the 
expression on the younger girl's face, ruby lips parted as the tip of 
the spoon was placed in her mouth.

Light colored eyes widened as the taste of the soup danced on her taste 
buds. It was not only edible, it was absolutely delicious! Who knew 
Hotaru could cook this well?

Hotaru laughed at the bewildered expression on Rei's face. Thank god she 
took cooking lessons from Michiru and Makoto. It was true they resulted 
when Michiru-mama saw the state of the kitchen when Haruka-papa tried to 
cook. But thank god none of the sea nymph's threats came true and Haruka 
had been, for the most part, unharmed.

"Surprised I can cook?"

As much as Rei longed to wipe that annoying and cocky smile off Hotaru's 
face, she couldn't help but think of how annoyingly cute she looked. 
Better stick with instincts.

"Considering Haruka raised you, yes."

Hotaru was more than prepared for Rei's comment. She knew the miko would 
say something like that. Her pink lips curled into a mocking smile. It 
was amusing to see the fiery woman pale.

"At least mine is edible. More than I can say about the curry and rice 
you made for ChibiUsa-"

A single finger pressed against the moving lips, silencing the younger 
woman. To say the action shocked her was putting it lightly. As she 
stood there, eyes wide, Rei was struck again by her beauty. She looked 
like an innocent angel, frozen with disbelief. For once, Hotaru's violet 
eyes reflected everything she was feeling. Pale cheeks were tainted with 
a rosy blush, making the powerful senshi look like a love stuck school 
girl.

Hotaru's brain was utter mush. Rei was NOT touching her lips with her 
finger. This was like the other day all over again and they were in the 
kitchen... again. One difference, her secret love held all the cards 
this time. She could do whatever she wanted and Hotaru knew she'd go 
along with it, no complaints. After all, who could say no to those eyes?

Rei knew she had Hotaru's undivided attention. Her violet eyes were 
trained on the miko, unblinking. For the first time, the senshi of fire 
felt uncomfortable under another's gaze. She's always known exactly how 
to play the game to keep all eyes on her. She loved attention.

But Hotaru's intense eyes were something different. They paralyzed her, 
all thoughts fleeing her mind. It would be so simply to take her right 
there and then. A simple kiss and she'd be in her arms. Her guest would 
not resist.

The look in her eyes told her so. She trusted Rei completely. She was so 
innocent, so pure. The senshi of Death and Destruction, not to mention 
Rebirth, stared at her, eyes unguarded. She was the miko's to take.

Hotaru's breath caught in her throat when Rei leaned closer to her. 
Anticipation pumped through her veins. So the businesswoman has decided. 
This time, she wouldn't resist.

Rei saw the excitement in the shorter girl's eyes as she removed her 
finger. She continued moving closer, the girl's scent both intoxicating 
her and bringing her to the edge of her sanity.

Seconds stretched into years as Hotaru felt Rei's body move closer and 
closer. All she could focus on were those full lips. The lips she's 
dreamed of for years. And they were getting closer to her own. She could 
practically feel them on hers. Sweet sin.

Rei needed not move too much farther to claim her friend's pink lips. 
Hotaru's ragged breath fell on her neck, charging her. This was it.

The college student wondered if Rei could hear her pounding heart. Their 
lips were separated by a single layer of molecules. Finally.

The ruby lips touched Hotaru's cheek.

Rei drew away from the kiss, noting Hotaru's wide eyes. They turned to 
her, confused.

The miko barely controlled her own need, crushing to urge to kiss 
Hotaru's pouty lips.

There were no words to describe how the violet-eyed girl felt at that 
point. She was snapped back to reality and felt as if she's been 
slapped.

The darkening of Hotaru's eyes almost sent Rei's self control out the 
window. But no, she couldn't.

A hand caressed the shorter girl's pale cheek, causing their eyes to 
meet. The miko smiled weakly and opened her mouth to speak.

'Tell her!' She shouted mentally, 'Tell her you don't want to hurt her! 
Tell her you don't want to do something just because you were caught up 
in the moment. Tell her you don't want her to do something she'll regret 
later! Tell her, damn it...'

"Let's eat."

Hotaru could only stare at the woman she loved. 'Let's eat?'

For once, Rei wished she had Makoto's power over nature and earth. That 
way, she could arrange for a nice hole to appear beneath her and swallow 
her whole.

'Let's eat!' Was she insane? That was NOT what she meant to say.

"Hotaru-"

"Sure, you must be hungry."

Hotaru turned around, afraid to let Rei see the tears collecting in her 
eyes. So, the miko didn't care for her like that. Why else wouldn't she 
take the opportunity to kiss her? She was clearly giving her permission 
to. What went wrong?

Hotaru moved silently, her destination in sight. Despite being one in 
the morning, light came from the open door. It had been shut almost 
completely to keep the light pouring from it at a minimum.

Stepping in, violet eyes soon found the woman behind the desk. Raven 
hair was pulled back in a sloppy ponytail to prevent it from getting in 
the way of the focused, dark eyes.

Hotaru didn't know whether to scold Rei for staying up so late or admire 
her work ethic. Settling for somewhere in the middle, she knocked on the 
door.

"Huh?"

Rei looked up, blinking in surprise. Her glasses perched on the tip of 
her nose, giving her a very scholarly look. A smile graced her features 
at the sight of the girl waiting in the doorway.

"Oh, hey! What are you still doing up?"

Hotaru crossed the distance between them and handed the miko the cup in 
her hands. She was given an appreciative smile and watched the older 
woman cradle the tea in her hands.

"I should be asking you that question."

The miko smiled sheepishly and looked at the clock.

"I need to get these reports done and these papers signed. Besides, I 
didn't even notice the time."

Hotaru let her annoyance show as she sat down on Rei's desk at a clean 
spot. The other woman seemed to back away slightly, though she never 
looked away from the violet orbs of the girl perched on her desk.

"Then why did you ask me why I'm still up?"

"Simple, you said you were going to bed a while ago."

The answer and the cocky smirk were the classic Rei Hino retort. Letting 
it slide, silence settled over them. Yet again, it was an awkward 
silence. What with the situation they were in only a few hours ago. 
However, neither dared to talk about it.

"So, how much longer are you going to take?"

Rei's eyes browsed over the papers on her desk.

"Another hour or two."

"I hope you don't plan on going to work tomorrow."

Rei smiled softly at Hotaru's protective tone. She will never get used 
to being scolded by the young woman. It was touching, of course. 
Everyone gave up on trying to get her to listen.

"I have to," Rei said and seeing her friend's protest, she quickly cut 
the younger girl off. "But only for a short while."

Hotaru considered the woman's words. The taller woman was the founder of 
one of the fastest growing businesses. Already, she hasn't been to work 
for three days. The work must be piling up, like the ones on her desk.

"Hotaru, why don't you go sleep? I'll be done in a while. No use waiting 
up for me."

The girl considered this and nodded. Bidding her long time crush 
goodnight for the second time, she walked out. The miko smiled adoringly 
before going back to work.

Onwards to Part 12


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