Chapter 03: The Waiting Game
Tataku stood nervously on the Academy station docking platform,
watching as the ship slowly manoeuvred into position. Her mind raced as
she tried to think if there was anything she had forgotten. There was no
time to go back for anything later. As soon as she got on board they
would be leaving again. Misaniti-sensei had already made the
arrangements with the ship's crew, and there was no need to take her own
ship since apparently this one was big enough for her as well.
She hurriedly removed her glasses and tucked them self-consciously
into her bag as she saw the crew emerge from the ship - the crew she
would be spending the next two weeks with.
The first one off was a short girl who introduced herself as Sylvie
Ferr and the taller, subdued one who followed just called herself Yae.
Behind them was a woman about her own height in clothing that seemed to
drown her, though it didn't fully hide something that covered her leg.
She turned out to be Jei, the courier she would be working with, and
finally came a very grumpy blonde whom Jei named as Angelica and who
didn't seem to be in the mood to talk.
"We also have a guard for this trip, Crow October. You're the
university representative, correct?"
Tataku nodded and bowed. "Yes, I'm Tataku Moniko, from the advanced
cultural studies course. Nice to meet you."
"I assume you know the details of what's needed?"
"Umm, yes I do." Tataku said, a little worried at Jei's blunt
manner.
She was reassured a second later when Jei gave her a brief smile.
While the others might not have believed it, Jei was not one to
intimidate those she worked with. "Good. We'll leave as soon as you're
ready." And with that she turned and headed back into the ship.
"Don't worry about her," Angelica said a little louder than
necessary, "she's always like that. Good to have you aboard."
When she too had vanished back inside Yae stepped over to her. "Do
you have everything?" she asked, indicating the two bags at Tataku's
feet and giving the girl a reassuring smile.
"Yes, this is it." The green haired girl lifted the bags onto her
shoulders.
Yae nodded. "Good. Don't worry about them," she said, motioning to
the ship door and the two who had gone in, "it's just each other they
drive crazy."
The three of them headed into the ship, Sylvie bringing out Andy
from under her arm. "But the ship is doomed!" she said, putting on a
lousy faux voice this time.
Yae giggled a little, which Tataku thought seemed a little odd
considering her image and previously dour manner, but it made her seem
much more alive, and she was thankful for the friendliness. Tataku
herself smiled and quirked an eyebrow at them.
"Oh, and don't mind her with the panda either. She does that
occasionally," Yae commented, giving the toy a bop on the head. "This
isn't the time."
Sylvie just smiled back at the pair and stuck her tongue out
playfully. "With those two in there we need him more than ever! His
name's Andy."
<Whatever this trip will be,> thought Tataku as she headed inside
with the two soldiers, <it won't be boring.>
***
Tataku wasn't wrong either. She had brought several of her
textbooks with her but she never had long enough to start studying
properly before something happened. After a full day of it she had only
had a single conversation with any of them, but it felt as though she
knew each of them inside out.
Right now Jei was, as she always seemed to be, fending off
Angelica's company as the energetic outlaw tried to engage her in some
form of boredom relieving activity. It was actually quite clear the
taller woman was having a hard time trying to rein in her anger and not
lash out, and over the last four hours she had been muttering to herself
almost non-stop, but that didn't phase the outlaw in the slightest.
"I mean, seriously, is Sylvie the only one of you lot with any sense
of fun? Come on, you have to admit that panda is cute. You're talkin'
anyway so there's nothin' stoppin' you talkin' to me, and I know you've
got nothin' to do either. The other two are flyin' this thing so it's up
to us three to pass the time on our own."
Jei gritted her teeth. "Just leave her Jei. Hitting her didn't do
any good last time and it won't now," she said under her breath. "Why
won't she leave me alone?"
"You do realise that in the old days talking to yourself was
considered the first sign of madness, don't you?" Angelica opined as she
sat at the table Jei had picked in the leisure room.
Jei looked up and tried to exude an aura of menace. "There is
nothing to say that I am not in fact insane, so if I kill you it's not
my fault. For the last time go away!"
Tataku felt very sorry for Jei as she watched them from behind her
glasses. It seemed Angelica was blissfully unaware that she was driving
the target of her attention completely up the wall, even if Jei hid it
very well - apart from the muttering of course.
<Then again, perhaps that is the point. To break her will to resist
her company.> The thought made Tataku ever so slightly ill. It was a
very cruel way of doing it if that was the case.
Angelica smirked and began petting her cat when he jumped up onto
the table. "So, you're not goin' to tell me to leave any more? Guess
that means we can stay, huh Tangalo?"
The enraptured feline just purred into her hand as she scratched
under his chin.
Jei on the other hand growled audibly and left the room. "Once more.
Just once more and I'll make her regret it. Just once."
She could feel her resolve cracking. Badly. This was why she always,
*always* worked alone. She prayed to herself that she had the strength
not to break down and cry next time. She knew there would be a next time
and she wouldn't give that woman the satisfaction of seeing her broken.
In the leisure room Angelica chuckled as she stroked her pet. "You
know Tangalo, she can't ignore us forever, and she's not goin' to pay up
soon either I'm guessin'. Well, if I'm stickin' around with her she's
going to learn to lighten up whether she likes it or not before I go
nuts. What's the point of life if you're not goin' to live it?"
She played idly with Tangalo of a while, the cat rolling around as
he enjoyed her ministrations. "Hey, Taku, what are you doin' on this
trip anyway? No-one tells me anythin' around here."
Tataku frowned, slightly irritated. "Umm, I'm here to buy the
chemicals we need. And my name is Tataku."
"Oh." A little more succinct than she had expected, but it was at
least an answer. "Right. So, the old guy on the radio said you were a
student right?"
Tataku nodded. "I'm taking the cultural studies course there."
"Cultural studies? So that's, what, learnin' about different people
and stuff?"
Tataku nodded again. "We learn about the various races and their
subcultures, how they function and how we can better understand each
other."
"Jeez," Angelica said as Tangalo playfully gnawed on her finger,
"ain't that a bit dull?"
"No, it's very interesting!" She felt rather offended by that, but
it saddened her that the other woman couldn't recognise the need for
such understanding. "And it's important to understand each other so we
can avoid any more conflict. We don't have to like each other, but
nobody can afford any more wars. With today's space reliant lifestyles
and so many interdependent communities it would be disastrous."
"I guess. Better you than me though. I couldn't stand it."
After a short silence Angelica sighed, utterly bored and leaving
Tangalo sleeping on the table as she rose. "Let's go find that sourpuss
and do something. Anything's better than just sitting here!"
"I think she wants to be left alone for a while," Tataku commented,
looking up from her book.
"She's just somewhere on her own bored stiff, just like us, and she
just doesn't want to admit it. She thinks I'm just after my ship."
"What are you after?" Yae had already filled her in on the reason
Angelica was there.
"I'm her partner until I get my ship, and partners work together.
She's just bein' rude. And if we find Yae we'll bring her too. I've been
here a week and all she's done in all that time is fly and mope. So, I'm
gonna get us all together and we're gonna enjoy ourselves."
She reached over and plucked the book out of Tataku's hands. "And no
studyin' either. Come one."
Tataku didn't have time to complain about it as she was pulled to
her feet, Angelica leading her by the arm out of the room. "Ow, t-that
hurts, please stop it!"
"Just 'cos you guys don't know how to have fun doesn't mean you
can't learn," Angelica said lightly as she led the thin girl through the
door.
Tataku would never have thought Angelica was as strong as she was
from looking at her but she managed to drag her effortlessly down the
corridor. Tataku on the other hand was never a physical person, and her
attempts to struggle out of Angelica's vice-like grip were completely
futile.
"Please, you're hurting me! Let me go!"
Angelica turned to say something but was silenced immediately as
Tataku's hand flashed across her cheek. The taller girl was close to
tears as she pulled her arm free of her grip. Angelica had no idea what
she had done to deserve it, but the sheer fact that the shy bookworm of
a girl had slapped her left her reeling.
Tataku stood there glaring through her watery eyes at her as she
rubbed her sore arm. "Maybe you should try thinking about other people's
feelings before you try doing what's 'best' for them."
Angelica just stared as the green haired young woman turned and ran,
but it was Tataku who was the most shocked by what had just happened.
She was too confused and upset to realise it at the time, but that was
the first time she had ever hit another person in her life.
***
Jei's nerves had calmed by the time she had found the entrance to
the observation deck of the Gal's Army. It was a huge room that covered
the entire top floor of the ship, huge hyper-reinforced glass panels
giving the viewer the magnificent spectacle of space at every possible
angle. And since there were usually only ever two crew members it was
always deserted. Sylvie was better used at the scanners than this place
if anything came up. The only things to obscure the view were the six
gun turrets that lined the upper edges of the ship, mirroring the ones
Jei knew were on the underside.
"Oh, hi Jei. What's up? Does Sylvie need me back downstairs?"
Jei looked over to see Yaedite sitting cross legged in the middle of
the room, her hands inside her jacket sleeves, fidgeting listlessly with
the cuffs. "No."
"Oh." Yae's smile faded a little. "So, what can I do for you?"
"I just came to be alone."
"Oh, I see." Yae sighed and got to her feet. "I'll leave you to it.
I could do with some sleep anyway."
To her surprise Jei blocked her path as she headed for the door.
"I don't need to be on my own to be alone. Since you're here too I
would be happy to have some company that had a practical dress sense."
Yae looked down at her crumpled clothing and gave a little smirk as
Jei's sense of humour. "Oh. 'kay."
The pair sat down at the center of the room, Yae leaning back to
look up at the stars while Jei stared off into the distance.
"How's the knee?" Yae asked, giving a glance at the awkward bulge on
the scruffy woman's leg.
Jei let a hand rest on the cloth covering the scaffold that held her
knee together as it slowly healed. "It aches." It would be some time
before she could have the metal removed.
The two of them sat there in companionable silence for what seemed
like an age before Jei spoke.
"May I ask you a question?"
"Sure, I guess," Yae said, surprised that the other woman had broken
the silence first.
"I want the outlaw to leave. She has done everything she can to make
me hate her, she took almost everything I had but left me alive, and she
calls me 'partner'. I know I cannot get rid of her without using extreme
force. I don't want to do that, so I don't know what to do."
In all honesty Yae didn't feel qualified to answer that. In the time
that she had known her she'd come to see Jei as a very complex person,
and here she was asking her for advice. It seemed surreal.
"I don't know either. She just seems to do what she feels. She is
what she feels. I guess I'd just sit her down and talk to her and just
try and get things straight. It's not as bad as it could be. You could
be dead."
Jei lowered her head. "That wouldn't have been a bad thing."
"Come on, you can't mean that, and she's lost just as much as you.
Maybe she's just hanging on to what she knows." Yae sighed. "Sylvie's
the one to ask about this kind of stuff. She may be a bit shy but she
knows how people work."
Jei just nodded, thankful for the input, even though she didn't
believe the advice would work.
"Can I ask you a question?" Yae asked. Since the conversation had
been started she was in no hurry to end it. If she were honest with
herself she was glad to have someone to talk to.
"I'm here."
"Well, why were you watching me that night?"
Jei's eyebrows rose. "What?"
Yae pushed ahead, knowing Jei knew what she meant. "On Banpail, in
the cafe. It was you watching me, wasn't it? Why?"
It took a long time for Jei to answer. "... I don't know."
"Then what were you doing there?"
"Walking."
Yae sighed. "You're not gonna give me any more than that, are you?"
"I don't know." Jei thought about that for a while. All she had
really wanted was to see where she was, and somehow she had ended up
there. "I was seeing an attractive woman after she had cried herself to
sleep. I was exploring what might have brought her to that point."
"Huh?" Yae said, feeling very confused. It sounded almost like
psychobabble to her.
"I didn't mean any harm. I was just curious."
Yae decided to let it go. The way Jei had said it made her feel a
bit uncomfortable. "Just don't tell Syl I was crying, okay?"
"She knows."
That brought Yae up short. "What?"
"She knows you were crying. It's in her eyes. You close yourself off
and it pains her."
"I know." Yae stared at her hands in her lap. "I'm just making
things worse aren't I? I just can't get used to seeing her and not...
What about you? You're always so cold. How can you tell about this
stuff?"
"I'm just myself, and I see what is shown to me."
"So... what? You want to give me advice, is that it?" Yae didn't
know whether to be hopeful or angry if it was true.
"No. I live my life, and you live yours. Do you want advice? I don't
know if I can give you anything worthwhile though. I'm not very good at
it."
Yae decided that it wasn't beneath her to ask for help after all.
She knew she was slowly destroying the only friendship she had, and the
only thing that mattered to her. "Yes. I do."
"She doesn't return your affections, but hasn't stopped caring for
you the way she did. Get used to living with her in whatever way you can
manage, or else leave. Hiding from her in plain sight only makes the
wound deeper."
"I can't leave," Yae said defiantly. "Never."
From behind them Sylvie gave a cute sniffle. "Good. I'd miss you if
you did."
Yae spun around in panic as she heard her friend's voice. "Syl, err,
how long... That makes it sound really bad doesn't it?"
Sylvie shook her head, and behind her a very timid looking Tataku
was making the same gesture. "We only just got here, and it's okay if
you don't want to talk to me about it." She gave the pair a warm smile
but soon got onto the other matter. "I was looking for you and I found
Tataku in the mess room. I don't know why, but Angelica upset her. A
lot."
Behind her Tataku shook her head in denial, "It's okay, I did
something really bad. She just made me a-angry and I was feeling guilty.
I'm sorry about this. I'll apologise."
"Tataku, I'm sure it wasn't your fault," Sylvie said gently, and Yae
nodded in agreement. "Show them your arm. It's okay."
Tataku looked nervously at the other for a while before slowly
pulling back the sleeve of her sweater. There were two small bruises
just above her wrist where Angelica had gripped her.
Yae practically exploded onto her feet, her eyes wide with anger. "I
can't believe it! I'll give that arrogant bitch something that fights
back to deal with!"
"No, please, it's okay," Tataku pleaded, "I d-don't want to cause
trouble. Please?"
Sylvie lay a hand on Yae's arm. "It's your shift, and we can deal
with it in the morning. Come on."
Yae slowly acquiesced as Sylvie led her off to the cockpit. Behind
them Tataku turned to Jei. "What did you mean about Yae's 'affections'?
Is that why she's always so depressed?"
"Yae loves her."
"Love?" Tataku's heart instantly went out to the short haired girl.
She could only imagine how hard it must be to love someone you spent
your life with and not have it returned the same way.
Jei nodded. "I read about it sometimes."
She looked out to the other ship that slowly paced the Gal's Army.
"I warned her. Time to earn your pay October-san."
***
The following morning Crow ducked onto the Gal's Army, leaving the
Maria's Summer safely anchored to the coupling dock. <Time to find out
why I'm here.>
He was met by the technician/navigator/most-everything-else Sylvie
and Jei. He assumed the new member of their group standing behind them
was the trader the Academy had sent.
Jei stepped forward. "Angelica has gone too far. We've managed to
get her sword from her. I assume you can handle guarding her room. She's
not to be allowed out of there."
Frank and to the point as usual. Crow however couldn't help but be a
little stunned. "What happened?" Sylvie had only said Jei had wanted him
onboard to settle a problem the outlaw had caused. "I don't like her,
but she never struck me as a real threat."
Jei remained impassive. "She has, intentionally or otherwise,
assaulted a member of the expedition, and as such is being restricted to
the brig until you see fit. You know the law, and I want her there as
long as legally possible until this is over."
She left it at that and left Crow to do his job. He knew he should
have seen it coming really, the pair sparked off each other without even
trying.
"October-san?" Sylvie said, turning his attention back to the other
two. "This is Tataku Moniko, from the university. Tataku, this is Crow
October."
Crow appraised the girl as she gave him a tentative smile. The
glasses gave her the look of a very cute bookish girl, and he recognised
the very subtle traits that marked her as a Kai Reithan. The fact that
her green hair was natural was the biggest giveaway though, going right
to the root. The chances were he was the only one on board who knew,
provided she hadn't told them.
"Nice to meet you October-san," Tataku said softly, and with some
small hesitation. His unusual clothing and bandage wrappings intimidated
her a little.
"And you Tataku, but as I'm sure you've gathered we're all on first
name terms, so it's Crow," he said, trying to set her at ease and
extending a hand. He did think it was a bit shallow of her, but the last
thing he wanted was for someone to be afraid of him. Well, sometimes a
little fear could be healthy, but this wasn't one of them. "You too
Sylvie. We've talked enough on the radio after all."
Tataku took the hand and shook it cautiously, but it seemed to
reassure her. The handshake was an almost symbolically human gesture, so
at least she knew what, if not really who, he was and she mentally
chastised herself for her timidness. Sylvie for her part smiled
sheepishly and got Andy to put his paws over his eyes over her official
introduction.
"Yae's looking over Angelica until you're ready. She won't find her
such an easy target. I... don't mean to be rude, but Angelica is a lot
stronger than she looks." It had taken her, Jei and Yaedite working
together to get her into the secure room that served as the brig.
Crow nodded. "After seeing that sword of hers I don't doubt it." He
reached into his bag and pulled out a typically huge and chunky pistol.
"I've learned to look after myself."
Sylvie wasn't as convinced as the other two about Angelica's level
of malicious intent, but she did admit the outlaw needed to learn that
what she had done wasn't acceptable behaviour. Tataku on the other
hand...
"Umm, Crow?" asked the tall, slender girl as Crow started off.
"Please, don't h-hurt her. She shouldn't have done what she did, but it
wasn't really her fault."
Crow nodded. Chances were Jei was overreacting, maybe using it as an
excuse to get back at the annoying woman, but with Yae and Sylvie both
corroborating the story he knew it was something that needed dealing
with.
***
She must have been stuck in there for at least a day by the time she
woke up again. The 'brig' was really just a small room with a bed and a
heavy door that the others had locked. Angelica was furious.
"HEY! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! LET ME OUT THIS INSTANT!"
She hammered on the door again just to make the point and Crow
popped his head up to the small window in the door.
"Are you actually capable of saying anything else? That phrase is
getting old."
Angelica fumed. "Of course I am! I want to see Tangalo."
"We did bring him down earlier, but your hammering scared him off."
Angelica huffed. "Typical." She plodded back to the bed and sat down
heavily. "My life officially sucks."
She missed her old crew. Tataku reminded her of Laura a bit, but
Laura was always happy to have a laugh with her. That was the problem
with everyone here. They were too wrapped up to have fun, and she was
determined to get them to do just that. Provided of course that they
didn't keep locking her up, hitting her and so on.
And as much as she didn't want to admit it to herself, that look in
Tataku's eyes had haunted her, like it was herself who had done
something terrible to her. Maybe she had and she just didn't know it.
That was the real problem. The rules had changed, but she wanted to play
the same old game she always had. Now she was surrounded by people who
had very different ideas from her. Despite her accent she wasn't badly
educated, even if she couldn't remember learning what she knew, and one
old idea had begun to surface in her mind. When the insane rule, are the
rational any longer really sane? Or something to that effect. She
couldn't remember the exact quote.
Maybe that wasn't the exact case here, she admitted to herself, but
the same thinking applied. It was just such an unpleasant thought,
putting yourself second to your work. That was no way to go through
life.
"Hey Crow, you still out there?"
"Yes," his voice drifted over from behind the door.
"What d'you do for fun?"
"Avoid guarding mouthy outlaws for one."
Angelica rolled her eyes in annoyance. "Ha ha, very funny ghoul-man.
Come on, you gotta enjoy somethin', right?"
Crow thought for a second. She must be *really* bored. "Good food,
good wine, good music."
Well, there was some common ground at least. Angelica's stomach was
a real connoisseur. "Hmm, what do you think about the Llantaria 3rd 39."
Crow was fairly surprised at that. She knew her wines. "Good
vintage. Too dry though, and I prefer reds anyway."
"All right, how about the Cabernet Sauvignon say... mid thirties?"
Crow smiled and had to suppress a chuckle. "Not after 33. The newer
ones are far too weak now they've gone commercial again. And a knowledge
of good wine isn't going to get you out of there any quicker you know."
"Hey," Angelica grumped, "I can't even talk now? Fine, see if I
care. Ain't like there's nothin' to do in here."
Crow let the woman's sarcasm and temper settle. There wasn't any
reason she couldn't talk after all. "Rosenflair Hain 34 18th."
Angelica nodded from her bed, "Not bad. Bit heavy for a lot of food.
Never had 18th though, just 11th."
After a little while Crow's voice drifted over again. "Looks like
you've got a visitor."
Angelica's eyes shot up as the door opened. Tataku stood there in
another garish sweater, shuffling her feet nervously. "Umm, I just
wanted to say... I'm sorry I hit you." Her voice was almost too quiet to
hear. She knew she didn't really like the extrovert woman, but in her
mind that was no excuse for what she did.
Angelica sat up quickly as she turned to leave. "Hey."
Tataku paused.
"I didn't mean to hurt you, you know, so I guess I'm sorry if I
did."
Tataku nodded, absently rubbing her arm. That was all the answer
Angelica needed. "Guess I don't know my own strength huh?"
Tataku nodded cautiously again before leaving Angelica to her
solitude.
***
Several days later the others sat in the mess hall with their late
dinner, together for once now they had reached the trade lane that would
take them the rest of the way to their destination. Trade lanes meant
you could leave the ship on autopilot and not have to worry until you
got to the other end.
As it turned out Crow did indeed have a very good nose for wine, and
had brought a bottle of it with him, so Yae had pulled out all the stops
in cooking. Sylvie was a decent cook, but the short girl wasn't a patch
on Yae when she was on good form. Jei didn't hide the fact her cooking
skills weren't above mediocre, and Crow had to admit he would be hard
pushed to beat the bona fide roast that Yae had prepared. On a spaceship
full of preserved food that was a rare treat. Tataku was very modest
about her own cooking skills and refused to be baited into a comparison.
The others had to smile as she spent as much time indulging Tangalo
as she did on her food. Over the days of Angelica's imposed solitude it
had come to light that Tataku was a real animal lover, and Tangalo
obviously knew it, making full use of her affection whenever he could.
While the other three were comparing their worst culinary disasters
Tataku leaned over to Yae, who was taking the time to sigh over Sylvie
now the short girl's attention was elsewhere. "Yae, umm, if you feel
like you want to talk about anything anytime, well, I'll listen if you
want."
Yae looked over, surprised at the sudden change of conversation, but
she gave her a grateful smile. "...Thanks. Heh, have you ever tried to
chat with Jei?"
Tataku shook her head.
"Whenever she starts talking about emotional stuff she gets real
analytical and enigmatic. It was a bit creepy, like I was a science
experiment or something."
Tataku gave a sympathetic giggle and had to push her glasses back up
when they slipped, causing Yae to smile in return. Sylvie looked over to
the pair, glad to feel the growing melancholy in her boyish friend
lighten. She was also heartened to see she had started fiddling with her
fork, spinning it absently in her fingers. Yae getting fidgety was a
good sign. It meant she wanted to be up and doing something rather than
being contented to sit and indulge her depression.
However, the atmosphere was soon broken by a very familiar voice,
and the voice was far from pleased.
"Now, you guys lock me up and even if I did screw up that's a bit
extreme, but WHY THE HELL HAVEN'T I HAD ANYTHIN' TO EAT ALL DAY TODAY?"
They all looked round to see Angelica standing seething in the
doorway. How she had managed to get out of the brig room they had no
idea, but the fact was that she was here, and she was mad as hell!
<Oh no, dammit. This isn't going to look good, now is it?> Jei
thought to herself as she got to her feet.
<It wasn't on purpose. It slipped my mind.>
<Yeah, but who's going to believe that, huh? Face it Jei, you're in
trouble.>
Tataku looked at her scandalised, and Sylvie's expression was
getting close to that. "You forgot to take her her food?"
"...Yes. It was an accident."
The others didn't look too sure.
"Honestly," Jei insisted, her emotion beginning to slip into her
voice, "I didn't mean to."
Angelica stalked up to Jei until they were practically nose to nose,
and Jei actually backed up a step. "I don't know, and I don't care.
Maybe we didn't get off to a great start, but I've done everythin' I can
to try and be friendly and get you lot of miserable sods to enjoy
yourselves. The only person I've done anythin' wrong to has forgiven me
and you're just treatin' me like dirt out of pure spite. Like student
girl said, maybe we're not gonna be friends. Fine, I can live with that,
but we're gonna work *together*, because there is no way in hell you're
gettin' rid of me until *I'm* ready to leave.
"I'll do my work and take my cut and if that's the only way I'll get
what's mine then I'm gonna do it, and come hell or high water you ain't
gonna stop me."
She took a second to catch her breath and compose herself, running
her fingers through her shoulder length hair, her piece now said. "Now,
what do I have to do to get somethin' to eat around here?"
***
To Be Continued...
Back to Starlight Index - Back to Original Fiction Shoujo-Ai Fanfiction