A Shadowlander's Dream: Book 3 - Rules of the Flesh (part 10 of 26)

a Original Fiction fanfiction by Kathryn K Williams

Back to Part 9
Amber's screams caught upon her dry lips as she sat bolt up in her bed 
and frenziedly searching her room for any sign of the nightmarish images 
from her dreams, her eyes darting wildly around her room in desperate 
search of her foster sisters only to find herself entirely alone. The 
tattered mattresses and bunk bed from her dreams had been replaced by a 
sturdy wide white wood framed bed with a mattress newer then anything 
Amber had ever had in her life. The worn out blankets, that barely kept 
her warm at night, were replaced with a large thick comforter that she 
felt lost in. The paint peeling walls and piles of hand me down clothes 
that she had long called home was all just a memory from another time in 
her life, a time that now only existed in her dreams. Only pristine 
white bedroom furniture gleamed in the waning moon's light, surrounded 
her with the reassurance that all was but a nightmare.  

Although it has been over five years since she last stayed within the 
walls of that dreadful foster home it was all that filled her mind at 
night, causing her to awaken with her nightgown drenched with sweat and 
her breath coming out in quivered gasps as she tried hard to regain her 
senses and ground herself in reality once again. They were only dreams 
and she knew that, but for some reason they felt more real then life 
itself. She clearly remembered every detail clearly, every sight and 
sound, down to the multicoloured landscape of dying leaves to kiss from 
her first love, Jessica Wright, when she was merely eleven years old. 
She had not seen Jessica since the girl's disappearance from the foster 
home almost six years ago and yet to this day she remembered the scent 
of the girl's body and the taste of her lips. 

Usually the nightmares had only been vague glimpses of the past, things 
she recalled happening all those years ago coming real during the night 
hours. This time however was very different indeed. It was nothing like 
she remembered happening before and the emotions the dream bared still 
held strong to Amber's tender heart. With trembling hand Amber lightly 
placed her fingers to her lips. She could still feel Jessica's last kiss 
and there was a lingering scent of the girl upon her the tips of her 
fingers. She bit at her lower lips as a deep longing rose from somewhere 
within the dark depths of Amber's mind. Her front teeth cutting through 
the soft flesh of her lips and her tongue taste the faint tang of blood. 
There was no pain and Amber did not realize what she was doing until she 
got that slight taste of copper and forced herself to released her grip 
upon her lip. 

She wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand and pulled back as a 
small pang of pain finally made itself known. Glancing down at her hand 
to see a streak of crimson coating it, the very sight of which sent a 
wave of images through her mind, images of her beloved Jessie swinging a 
blood soaked bat over head, splashing decaying walls in a morbidly 
artistic display. The sight of which sent her body into another fit of 
trembles as tears broke free from the corners of her eyes, tears that 
she had fought so long to keep at bay and never allowed to show in front 
of anyone. The vision conflicted with her very view of Jessica, whom 
Amber saw as sweet and protective. She could not conceive what could 
have brought her to imagine Jessica having any murderous intent in her 
body. This very thought confused and frightened the girl. A sob arose 
from within and Amber felt a need to hide before it escaped her throat. 
With nowhere to run she turned to her pillow and proceeded to bury her 
face into its fluffy fold, warping the pillow around her head as a low 
howl escaped her and loneliness threatened to overcome her. 

After Jessica had run away all those years ago Ma'am, their foster 
mother, went into a frenzy, she searched the entire house for the girl 
and eventually fell down the basement stairs, breaking both of her legs. 
She was sent to the hospital and deemed incapable of taking care of the 
girls any longer; as such the girls were rescued from the nightmares of 
that house. On numerous occasions Amber had asked the heads of the 
orphanage if Jessica was every found, but time and time again her 
questioned were returned with a sad eyed shake of the head. She was 
beginning to think that her girlfriend was no longer among the living 
and this crushed the teenaged girl's soul even more. However she clung 
to some hope that the girl would return to her.

Her new family, a loving couple by the name of Jane and Stan Howe, did 
everything they could to ease the girl's worries and stress. They 
surrounded her with many wonderful things and give her more love then 
she could ever have and yet she wanted something more, and that caused a 
tremendous guilt to well up inside of her like nothing else. She was 
grateful for everything that life had given her over the last few years, 
that she felt no reason for tears. The fact that she was indeed crying 
made her feel all the more distressed as she curled her legs under her 
body and shook with each sob. The Howe's had sent her to a number of 
doctors in an attempt to help her tormented mind and she was more then 
willing to attend the appointment, longing to be freed of the nightmares 
that haunted her. The fact that Amber never was able to tell Jessica how 
she truly felt hung heavy on the girl's mind but it was the one thing 
she never brought up to the doctors. She did not wish to worry her new 
family even more by informing them that their new daughter was even more 
tainted then they already knew. She also never even spoke of Ma'am sons 
or the horrible things that happened in that dark room, those where 
secrets that she planned to die with if she had too.

After a time her weeps began to subside and she rolled her head over to 
see a small white book sitting upon her night stand. Jane had given her 
the book to record all her thoughts and dreams, to better remember them 
so they could figure out what these nightmares were about and how to 
deal with them. Amber propped herself up on one arm and reached out with 
the other to take the book in her hands. Her name was written across the 
front in a gold embossed font that Amber enjoyed tracing her fingers 
across. The cover was white with brass fastened to the corners to 
protect them from folding and there was a brass lock along the side that 
held a tiny keyhole. Amber rolled over to the side of her bed that 
rested against the wall and reached between the mattress and the wall. 
Her fingers squeezed between the mattress and box spring until they 
touched something tiny and metal, retrieving her hand she peered at the 
tiny key that was between her fingers. Shakily she put the key into the 
lock and popped open the book, to be startled by something falling from 
between the pages. At first she thought that the very pages of her dairy 
were coming apart when she realized that it wasn't pages that has fallen 
free, but a old yellow envelope that had somehow gotten into her 
journal. Curiously she picked up the letter to glance upon its surface 
to find a message written in fancy hand script upon the top:

<i>Urgent: For Amber Gaites 
Open A.S.A.P. and while out of the sight of others.</i>

Amber blinked at the letter in confusion. How could someone put a letter 
inside of her locked journal, and better yet, why? Nervously she ran a 
hand through her red curls and wiped away some of the cold sweat that 
had gathered on her forehead. She had written in the book only minutes 
before lying down to sleep and did not remember anything between the 
pages then. She pondered over the idea of someone sneaking into her room 
in the middle of the night as she turned the letter over. On the back 
was a deep red wax seal of a coat of arms about the size of a quarter. 
The crest bored the image of a tree with a pair of eyes set to either 
side, eyes that appeared to be rather sad and Amber was almost certain 
that they were filled with some kind of pain. Flipping the letter over 
again she gazed at the scripture upon the surface and wondered what 
could be inside of the letter when there came a light raping at her 
door. 

"Amber?" A familiar voice softly inquired from beyond her bedroom door, 
"Amber, you awake?" 

"Yes." Amber answered in but a whisper, "One second, Sarah." Amber 
picked up her pillow and quickly placed the dairy and letter under it 
before moving to the door. Just as her hand was about to touch the knob 
she paused, her new parents allowed her to have a lock upon the door, 
for it made her feel a little more secure having the lock on her side of 
the door instead of the other way around. The door was still locked so 
there was no way for someone to enter her room. This thought disturbed 
her and she spun around to scan her bedroom. The windows were also 
closed and her bedroom was on the second floor so it was not possible 
for someone to enter by that means. Her eyes moved to her closet as she 
worried over the possibility of someone hiding amongst her few hanging 
clothes. This made a lump well up inside of her throat as she envisioned 
one of the demon teddy bears from her nightmares hiding in the closet, 
waiting to spring upon her. She shook her head at the notion, why would 
an evil teddy bear go through the trouble of sending her a letter only 
to attack her? Another knock upon the door caused Amber to jump in 
fright and she turned to face the door once again, quickly flipping the 
latch and opened the door ever so slightly. The very moment the door was 
open Sarah slipped into the room and passed her friend.

Seeing as Amber and Sarah were older then the rest of the girls at the 
foster home, and such close friends, it was decided that they should 
stay with the same family. Most families were only interested in girls 
five years of age or younger so this made Amber and Sarah's chances at a 
proper home very slim, seeing as they were both preteens. Luckily, 
however, they found a family that was more then willing to take two 
older girls into their home. Now eighteen, Sarah had grown to be a tall 
and beautiful teenager. Her sleek black hair had grown long over the 
years and now hung limply around her narrow face and over a power blue 
housecoat. 

Meanwhile Amber had only gained a few extra inches over the past few 
years and her curly locks had become more of a nuisance to her then 
anything else. No matter how much Jane claimed that her hair was 
beautiful she hated it to no end and preferred to keep it as short as 
possible. Her face was assaulted by a mob of freckles that she also 
detested and she wished she could have the same white skin as Sarah, 
which the girl made whiter by day with a layer of thick make up. Amber 
viewed her foster sister as lucky, with her looks she could gain any 
friend, if it wasn't for her interest in death that is, while Amber 
spent her school hours entirely alone. Well not entirely for over the 
past few years Sarah had become quite the Goth and favoured being alone 
over having friends. She always said that the only friend she needed was 
Amber and that she was glad they became sisters in the end. This meant 
that the girls got teased a lot at school, but Amber was just happy to 
not be entirely alone.

Currently Sarah was nervously playing with the ends of her hair as she 
paced in the middle of Amber's room. Amber silently closed the door and 
made sure it was securely locked before approaching her friend, and 
sister, "What's wrong? Another nightmare?" Amber inquired lightly as she 
tried to place an arm around the girl. 

Sarah shook her head, then nodded, followed by shaking her head again. 
She switched from playing with her hair to chewing on her thumbnails, 
"I'm so confused." Sarah stated as she hit the side of her head with her 
free hand, "My head feels like it is going to crack open." 

Amber gingerly took Sarah's hands and gently pulled them down, "What are 
you talking about? What happened?" Slowly she ushered the girl to her 
bed and sat down. 

Sarah wiped at the side of her head as she lowered herself next to 
Amber, "Have you been having more dreams about that place?" Sarah did 
not need to say more for Amber already understand what she was talking 
about. 

"Yeah," Amber admitted with a sigh, "I just had a really strange one 
with these weird teddy bears and some strange red-haired girl." 

Sarah quickly glanced up at Amber with a shocked expression upon her 
face, "Did she also have red eyes and did she get along with Penny 
really well?" She asked in a low nervous voice. 

Amber stared at her sister in disbelief, "How did you know about 
Kimberly?" She wasn't sure how she knew the girl's name, but for some 
reason the moment she mentioned Kimberly's name a clear image of the 
girl appeared in her mind. A small child with long red hair and the 
saddest looking eyes she had ever seem, but there was strength to the 
girl, something that she could not quite describe.

Sarah bounced on the bed excitedly, "We shared the same dreams again, 
didn't we?" 

Now it was Amber's turn to rub at her temples, "I guess so, but..." Over 
the past few years Amber and Sarah had been sharing the same nightmares 
about their old home. It didn't happen very often, but when it did they 
both remembered the dreams vividly the next day, as if it really 
happened. At first they figured it was just them remembering the same 
events since they both spent several years at that foster home, however 
nothing like this had every happened before. Amber muddled over her 
memories before she spoke again, "Didn't she arrive just after Jessica 
ran away?" She inquired carefully. 

"That's what I remember too." Sarah stated, and then pulled out a photo 
from her housecoat pocket, "But when I checked the photo of us at the 
adoption centre she wasn't there." She handed the photo over Amber to 
take a look for herself. 

Amber snatched up the photo and stared at it. There, staring back at 
her, were her foster sisters; Amber and Sarah stood in the back with 
Caitlin and April in front of them. There was no sign of Jessica or 
Kimberly. The photo had been taken the day after they had been removed 
from Ma'am's care and placed back in an orphanage. She remembered they 
all wanted to have a photo to remember each other by before they got 
split up again. Jessica not being there made some sort of sense, but 
what happened to Kimberly. What happened to her after Ma'am fell down 
the stairs?

"D... di... did... Jess...?" Amber stammered she needed to know if 
Jessica really did return like in her dreams, but couldn't bring herself 
to ask the question. She glanced at Sarah with tears in her eyes, biting 
at her trembling tattered lips she took a deep breath and swallowed 
hard, "Did... she return...?" She could feel her voice crack on that 
last word.

Sarah slowly nodded her head and placed a hand upon Amber's, "She came 
back for us." She stated firmly, "She didn't abandon us after all." 

Amber's eyes fell back to the photo, "Th... then wh... where is she...?" 
She asked in a low voice. 

"I don't know, but I think this may give us some answers." She pulled 
out a yellow envelope from her other pocket and held it out to her 
sister. It held the same scripture as the letter that Amber had found in 
her dairy just a moment before, however this one said "Sarah Richards" 
in place of Amber's name. 

Amber took the letter and gazed at the words upon its surface, "How did 
they know your real name?" Amber inquired curiously, glancing at her 
pillow from time to time, wanting to compare it to own letter, but not 
sure she should mention it just yet, "Shouldn't it say 'Howe' instead of 
Richards?" They had taken the family name of their new parents soon 
after being adopted. Neither of them wished to return to their old lives 
and somehow changing their names felt like a small bit of closure in 
their lives. Only their parents, the adoption agency and themselves knew 
their old names so the sight of someone using those names sent a shiver 
through Amber as she considered who it could be. 

Sarah shrugged, "I wanted to wait till I talked with you before opening 
it." Sarah stated as she took the letter from the girl's hands and 
scanned its surface, "Did you get one?" She inquired curiously. 

"What makes you think I got one?" Amber asked worriedly, she was not 
sure why she didn't want to tell Sarah that she did indeed get a letter. 
Maybe it was because a part of her wished that it was a letter from 
Jessica, a letter delivered through her dreams, and that she wanted to 
be the only one to read it, alone, however the chances of it being from 
Jessica were slim to none and she laughed to herself for being so silly. 

Sarah studied her sister, "You did get one, didn't you?" She probed, 
"Did you open it already? Who was if from? Was it something naughty, is 
that why you won't show me?"
 
Amber flushed and shook her head, "I'm sorry. I was just being stupid." 
She remarked, and then pulled out her dairy and the letter out from 
under her pillow, "I found it just a moment ago." She said, while 
tapping the book upon her hand, "I don't know why I hide it from you... 
I just..." 

Sarah shook her head, "You don't need to explain." She glanced down at 
the letter and dairy, "Where did you find it?" 

"That's the strange thing." Amber noted as she opened the book, "It was 
between the pages, as if someone had stuffed the letter there while I 
was sleeping." She remarked, taking another glance at her closet then 
back at Sarah, "I know I locked it and the door before going to sleep so 
how the hell did it get there?" 

"That's strange." Sarah agreed with a nod. 

"Where did you find yours?" 

"Under my pillow." Sarah explained, "I know it wasn't there last night 
and I locked my door to so there is no way anyone could have put it 
there while I slept." Sarah carefully picked up Amber's letter and 
compared the two, "Where do you think they are from?" 

Amber shook her head, her eyes never leaving the envelopes, "I have no 
clue. I was wondering about that when you arrived." 

Sarah handed Amber her mail, "You open yours first." She stated 
nervously. 

Amber lightly took the letter in hand; she could feel her hands sweating 
as she turned it over to look at the wax seal once again. She glanced up 
at Sarah as she licked at her dry lips, "Why don't we do it together?" 

Sarah flinched slightly, "A... alright..." She said worriedly. She 
fiddled with the seam of the envelope, pushing her thumb under the fold 
of the opening and running it down to the seal where she stopped, "I 
can't do it." She stated as she let the letter drop to her lap. 

Amber took a deep breath, "Fine, I'll go first." She held the envelop 
between both of her hands with her thumbs on either side of the seal. 
Holding her breath, closing her eyes, she twisted the seal quickly, 
breaking it in two. Nothing happened, no crack of thunder or other 
ominous sound filled the air as her teenaged mind expected, she opened 
her eyes to see the wax seal had crumbled in her hands like ash and now 
was a pile of red dust upon her dairy. She glanced up at her sister for 
a moment to see Sarah watching intensely. She turned back to the letter, 
brushing the dust to the ground before she opened the flap. Inside she 
found two pieces of paper, one appeared to be a photo and the other some 
sort of ticket. 

"What is it?" Sarah inquired curiously, leaning over Amber's shoulder to 
get a better look. 

Silently Amber pulled out the photo to see an image of a group of 
teenaged girls sitting around a circular outdoor table eating. Amber's 
eyes immediately fell upon a tall boiish girl sitting at the far end. 
She was years older, had short spiky military style haircut and wore 
baggy overalls, but somehow Amber knew exactly who it was the moment she 
set her eyes upon the girl, "Jessica..." She breathed in shocked 
amazement. 

"Jessie?!?" Sarah stared down at the photo, she to found Jessica as 
quickly as her sister, then her eyes spotted something else about the 
photo, "That's Kimberly!!" She exclaimed, pointing at someone in the 
photo. 

Amber followed Sarah's finger to a short girl with long red hair and a 
flower covered dress. From her slouched posture and the way she sat 
close to a tough looking girl in black leather and long blonde hair it 
was apparently clear that this girl was very shy, and then she noticed 
another girl who looked exactly identical to the first however this one 
had short red hair and dressed a black t-shirt, "And so is she..." Amber 
said in a puzzled tone.

Sarah fell back upon the bed, "There really were two of them." She 
stated, suddenly realizing her mistake and slapping her forehead, 
feeling stupid for displacing the notion earlier. 

Amber glanced down at her sister, "Two of them? What are you talking 
about?" Amber felt as if she was being left out of something. 

Sarah sat back up and fiddled with her letter, "During that dream I 
remember helping Kimberly change out of her nightgown so she could take 
a bath. I offered to brush her hair and... Well... she ran away from me. 
Then later she appeared in pyjamas instead of a nightgown and was so 
open about changing in front of us that it shocked me, it was as if she 
were two different people. She claimed to have hit her head, but it 
looks like it was her twin that I'd met before. I thought there was 
something strange going on, but I didn't bother to push the girl too 
hard considering it was her first day at the foster home."  

Amber glanced between the images of the twins on the photo, "They were 
very different now that I think about it, but the first Kimberly was 
around for such a short time I didn't really think about it." She shook 
her head in frustration, "This is insane. We are talking about this girl 
as if she part of our family. She was only part of the dream, wasn't 
she?" 

Sarah stared at her sister, "Don't you feel it? She was there and it was 
more then just a dream. I remember her being there for weeks, or was it 
months, and then there was the way Penny and her grew closer. I also 
remember the two of them being taken to that dark room with Ma'am's sons 
and how she cried afterwards. If it were only a dream I don't think that 
part would be so real, would you?" 

Amber frowned as she gazed at the photo in search of some kind of 
answer. She did remember that night Kimberly and Penny were taken and 
how Kimberly cried in the washroom afterwards. She remembered being 
there for Kimberly the way Jessica was there for her when she first 
arrived at that house, soothing Kimberly's worries and keeping her out 
of trouble. Kimberly was like her little sister, no she was her little 
sister, just like Caitlin, April and Sarah are. There was no doubt about 
it; Kimberly was as real as Sarah was sitting next to her. She lightly 
touched the photo, longing to enter it and join the joyous feeling that 
seemed to emit from it. 

"You're right." Amber finally said with a deep sigh, "She's one of us 
and no matter how I look at it I can't pretend that she was just another 
dream." She curiously turned the photo around, in search of some answers 
to where the photo was taken; when she found writing on the back, "Look 
at this." She held the photo out so Sarah could read along with her. 

<i>"Take the ticket and go to the train station at exactly 4:15 AM,
go to the third platform and get on the second last car, no other.
What ever you do don't lose your ticket 
or allow anyone to know where you are going.
We will see you soon."</i>

"Ticket?" Amber glanced back into the envelope to find a train ticket 
marked 4:15 am, that day, Platform 3, "Who would send me a train 
ticket?" 

Excitedly Sarah opened her letter and held up the same photo and train 
ticket, "Who ever it is wants us to go together." 

Amber glanced at the clock to see it was only quarter after two in the 
morning, "We only have a few hours. What do we do?" She asked anxiously. 

Sarah jumped off the bed and ran over to the closet, "You want to see 
Jessica again don't you?" She stated as she opened the closet doors and 
pulled out a duffle bag from the upper shelves. 

Amber nodded slowly, "But the Howe's have given us so much. We can't 
just run away." 

Sarah tossed the bag at Amber, who caught it, "Don't lie to me." Sarah 
stated sternly, "You have been miserable since Jessica ran away. You can 
hide it from the doctors and the Howes, but I know you better then that. 
You still love her and you will not be able to go on until you see her 
one last time." 

Amber stared down at the photo again, "See her again?" How many times 
had she wished to set her eyes upon Jessica one last time, to hold her 
and tell her how much she loved her, too many times to count. 

Sarah did not wait for an answer as she opened the top drawer of Amber's 
dresser and grabbed a handful of clothes, "You're going." She partly 
ordered, then stuffed the clothes into the bag on Amber's lap, "And I am 
going with you." She stated, staring the girl directly in the eye. 

Amber snapped out of her daze, "We can't just run away. What about 
school and our new home and everything else?" 

Sarah took Amber's cheeks in her hands and forced the girl to look her 
in the eyes, "We either stay here and you mop around here miserably 
forever, or we chase this dream and find out where it leads us." She 
tapped the photo in Amber's hand, "Don't you want to know what they are 
doing in our memories and where they are now?" 

Amber nodded, "Yes, but how do we know this is not some kind of cruel 
joke?" 

Sarah shrugged, "We don't." She said with a deep sigh, "But I would 
rather know it was a joke then to not know at all." She stated simply. 

Amber let out a deep breath and glanced at her night table and a photo 
of her new parents. No matter how much she told herself that they were 
her parents they did not feel like family. Her family would always be 
her sisters from the foster home and she knew it deep in her heart. It 
wasn't just Jessica that she was missing. It was everyone and the 
thought that she could be back with them again made her heart race in a 
way it had not in done in years. Sarah was right, she had to find out if 
her sisters were awaiting her at the end of this journey or she would be 
haunted by the fact that she turned down even a possibility of seeing 
them again. 

"You're right." She finally admitted, "I'm going with you." 

Sarah smiled, "Come on then. We need to pack." She insisted as she took 
the duffle back in one hand and pulled her sister off the bed with the 
other, "You get your things together, while I get some of mine." 
Quickly, she dropped the bag and opened the bedroom door then halted, 
"She didn't abandon us." She suddenly said in a low whisper. 

Amber blinked and turned to face her sister, "What?" She did not quite 
hear Sarah's mumbles. 

When Sarah turned to face Amber there were tears in her eyes, "Jessica 
would never abandon us. No matter how many times I said she was dead I 
hoped she was still out there and I knew she would come back for us 
someday." She stated softly. 

Amber nodded, "I always believed she would come back to us too." She 
agreed and returned Sarah's smile, "Get your things. We have family to 
get back to."

Sarah ran across the room and threw her arms around Amber's shoulders, 
"I miss everyone so much." She cried softly into her sister's shoulder, 
"Jessica, Penny, Caitlin, April and even Kimberly. I want us all 
together again." 

Amber rubbed Sarah's back as she soothed the girl, "We will be back 
together again. You'll see."

*****

To be Continued . . .

Onwards to Part 11


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