"Evening Temptations" Erica and Jocelyn were deep in the violent dance of lovemaking when the pregnant young girl slowed down, froze up, and ceased all action, save for the intake of breath. Erica noticed the change in her lover's disposition and removed herself from the infinite mass of skin to look into her best friend's eyes. "What's the matter? Are you feeling well?" She reached out to curl her friend's chocolate hair, but her attentiveness was null. Erica had caused her friend some degree of pain before during sex, mostly when it came to the girl's steadily growing belly, but those issues had been ignored, and even at times, enjoyed. But something was different here. "I don't think I can do this anymore," came Jocelyn's reply. "Do what?" "This." "You mean...sex?" "I mean 'us'," she emphasized. She carefully pried Erica off her sweaty body, sat up, and felt around in the dark for her clothes. "Oh. Um...Joss?" "I'm sorry," she whispered. "Erica...this is...not going to work out." "You mean our relationship?" The slightest of nods came from her direction. "Look, being friends with you is one thing. And I don't even mind kissing you on the mouth. The sex was wonderful the first few times—just you being there loving me in a purely physical way was outstanding—but I don't think we should go on. It's not right." "What part of it's not right?" Erica laid a warm hand on her friend's spine. Joss didn't recoil. "Look, you're gonna hate me for this, but I don't think...we should do this sort of thing. I don't...want to be your lover or your girlfriend anymore. I do love you, Erica, it's just...that's not me. It's not who I am." "...Oh." Her voice carried defeat that only the heartbroken would know of. "Listen, I have no regrets. I am glad I got to be with you like that, even if it was a short while. It was good. I just...think of you as a friend too much to...you know. Have something like that. Look, we still have a relationship, we just can't..." "I think I understand what you're trying to say," Fox whispered numbly. "Please, don't take this hard." "I'm not. You're straight, I'm gay. We had a good time. But you have to be honest with yourself. Could you have been able to see the two of us together in a year, or five years, or ten? Could we have raised that child of yours, just the two of us? Could you sacrifice...male companionship...in that sense...for me? Could you admit to homosexuality in the same way I could? No, I understand." "You sound so heartbroken." Erica sighed, hugging her friend from behind in spite of neither of them not having anything on. "I am...but I understand. It was...just a fantasy. I'll get over it." "Hopefully we can look each other in the eye again without any embarrassing moments," added Joss. "I know it will be difficult. Making love to your best friend, and then breaking up with them because...it's not the way you know you want to live...it's hard. I'm already feeling terrible. But hopefully we can both get over this. And I hope you forgive me." "Nothing to forgive," whimpered Erica, kissing Jocelyn's beautiful imperfect shoulders, covered with sweat. She sighed. "Okay then. So...we're cool?" "Yeah." "Then may I use your shower?" "Sure. I guess you don't want me to join you." "No, not this time. Let's not make things worse and put ourselves into a situation where we know we'll be tempted." "Don't you mean, 'where I will be tempted'?" Both girls giggled faintly. "Well, you know...I'm still...a little bit attracted to you." Erica smiled. "Then you better go. Any plans after you get out?" "Well, it's late...and we're already here. I can sleep on the couch. I'd say share a bed, but you know. Evening temptations." Erica laughed, and restrained herself from kissing her best friend and ex-lover as she got up and walked to the bathroom. So, once again, she was alone. She had to wonder how Alisha would take this. Only one way to find out, so she reached for her cell phone. "...What? How dare she break my little sister's heart!" "Alisha, it's okay. I'm all right with it. I told her I understood." "You're just gonna bend? I thought you loved her, Ricky." "I do. I just can't... I have to be realistic about this." "Fuck realism, go and tell her you love her." "Alisha, I can't. It would only make things worse. Please understand." "...Hmph. I don't like this. She drags you along and then pulls this. Nothing but a screw and bolt world." "Alisha, it wasn't like that! She's not...like that." "You are such a pussy. Can't see how we're related." "You shut up! God, can't you for once just be supportive of me?!" "Look, I'm trying, okay? Kinda hard when you keep on defending her!" "I have to, she's my friend! No matter what, we'll still be friends." "Oh, yeah, right. Next thing you know, she'll have another girlfriend. Then what'll you say?" "Jocelyn's not like that." "...Well, she is more your friend than mine." "For a reason." "All right! God, sorry! Pull that stick out of your ass and throw it away, jeez! I'm sorry, okay—there, you happy?" "You didn't mean it." "......Erica, I'm sorry. You know I love you, and I'm trying to stick up for you. You just...get so defensive sometimes. And it's not cute over the phone." "You are such a cunt." "Yeah, I know. But hey, at least I admit it." "Yeah..." "So we cool?" "Yeah, we're still cool. Sorry. I can be a cunt too." "Not often. Sorry I bitched about your buddy. Hey, how bout' I treat you to breakfast when ya get home, huh? On the house." "Alisha, you can't afford Ramen Noodles, let alone breakfast." "Oh. Really." Erica giggled. "Look, I gotta go. I guess I should thank you for doing the sisterly thing." "Hey, no prob. Kiss-kiss." "Kiss-kiss. Bye." Click. Sigh. Erica looked to the bathroom, still hearing the water running. Jocelyn would be out in a matter of moments, then it would be her turn. After that... She could only hope they could return to normal. ......... Somehow, Amina found herself staying the night at Nomi's house. Ah, Nomi. Apparently the only girl in the whole school—or for that matter, the whole world—who not only realized that there was a living breathing girl here who had some degree of talent, but who befriended her and even liked her! Amina felt flattered, and surprised, and a little scared. Such attentiveness towards a person who was used to being invisible was...unhealthy. Amina didn't know whether she really had a crush on the other girl, as she had suspected at times, or if she just liked her immensely. She knew she couldn't talk to anybody about it—after all, who ever listened to her?—and she couldn't confess, she just couldn't. Everyone at the church would know if she did. She would be condemned and cast out, all for a suspicion, for a guess. She knew that having those feelings for Nomi, for any girl, was wrong, but...why did being around Miss Nakatori feel so good? Why did she feel more like herself during those sessions than any other moment? And so here she was, sharing a bed with Nomi. Nomi and Amina. A descendant of Native Americans, and a descendant of Muslims. A girl who had ran to God when her father left her, and a girl who had grown up in that environment. An artist, and another artist. A first-year student, and another first-year student. A seeker and a Catholic. Two people who could've been invisible everywhere else, except where they weren't wanted. Two people that, at one time, had shared something very intimate, something they had never given anybody else. Actually, if Amina recalled correctly, she had kissed Nomi twice. Washim knew it wasn't a sin to feel tempted, but some strange sensation in her mind told her to scoot closer, to drape her arms around the only person in the whole world who truly understood her, to lean down and take those pearly lips into her own. She wanted to. She felt the urge. She had to drive it away, she had to grasp the crucifix, she had to think of God's commands. She must not commit such things with Nomi (but at that age, she knew she shouldn't even do it with a boy). Her hand trailed over at least, and touched the girl's raven-wing hair. Touched, and trailed, and teased... "You can't sleep either?" Amina shyly withdrew her hand as Nomi tossed around, facing her. "Neither can I. Is something on your mind?" "N-nothing," she said shyly. Nomi made a face. "See, when you say 'nothing', I know it's something, so don't lie to me." "I'm not lying. It's nothing." "Now I know it's something. Hey, you can tell me. We're close friends, right?" Amina nodded. "And I've told you a few deep secrets too, right?" Again, a nod. "So...what's keeping you back? Getting it out is better than bottling it in, and now's the perfect time to do it." "I've nothing bottled up." "Washim." She edged closer and took her hands...those beautiful, reddened hands that could move with such dexterity if they had a pencil and paper... "Please. Trust me." I'm afraid. "Afraid of what?" She squeaked. "That I might be falling for you." "And that's scary?" She nodded. "Oh. ...Oh. So you're...and you think...oh. ...Oh. I don't know how to handle that. Uh...so is that what those kisses were about? Because I just thought you were doing it because you were curious, or you just...liked me. I mean, I didn't mind..." "So you're a lesbian?" "I am only myself," quoth Nomi sagely. "If what I do or think or believe defines me, I might not be myself anymore. All I am is myself. Everything that makes me up is a part of me. I can't be gay if I'm myself, for if I'm attracted to other girls, then it must be a part of who I am. But to answer your question, I have been attracted to you for awhile. If that makes you uncomfortable, I understand." "I'm just...confused. And you seem to be taking this well." "It's something I've been thinking about," she sighed humbly. "Ever since you...you know...I've been thinking. I had a feeling, too, but I didn't want to say anything that would push you away. Look, maybe we should just date for awhile and see how things go." "I can't." "Hear me out," she insisted. "Let's go on a few harmless dates, nothing more, and see where they lead us. If we want to go forward, okay. If not, fine. We're both a little too young to decide what we really are anyway." Amina grinned as Nomi finished her soliloquy. In all her years, she had never heard such wisdom coming from somebody so young. Everything she said made sense, and needed no further elaboration. "How'd you get so smart?" "Oh...you pick stuff up. Mostly mom. And Sarah Jo, and Mrs. Keys." "Oh yeah." They grinned again; Nomi surprised Amina slightly by silently leaning in for a kiss. Amina took her into her arms, tossing inhibition aside, and dared to drink deep from a forbidden pool. The ambrosia was more intoxicating than any beer, more uplifting than any soda, more powerful than any poison. It was during that night where two souls gave in to their evening temptations, just as two before them had resisted them, and two later would soon be tested... ......... It had only been four months since their first meeting, and yet it had felt like every single obstacle, trial, mountain, and valley had ran into them along the way. Ancelin Yi and Ivory Tran had been through it all, or most of it all, and they only had one night together, plus the winter vacation, before they would have to go back through it all again. But they were together, that was the point—the very reason they believed everything they had been through together, whether as friends or strangers, rivals or girlfriends, had been worth it. This was their first night together, the first time they would sleep under the same roof—in essence, the accumulation of their relationship up to that very period in time. And in spite of having slept with countless girls before, Ivory Tran was nervous. It had happened quite suddenly. Ivory had been walking Ancelin home, as she had started to do since first officially becoming her girlfriend, and the two were engaged in meaningless conversation—just this and that, whatever came up. Ivory started to prod into Ancelin's mother's relationship with her girlfriend, asking how it was going and how they were handling each other. "I'd imagine it'd be tough coming out to your own daughter like that," she said. "She did look to be struggling, but it was all right in the end. We accepted each other." "It does sound kinda hot when you think about it," mentioned Tran foxily. Ancelin gave her a playful slap for the remark. "No, really. Well, plus, your mom's totally cool. Mine is...god, what a pain in the ass!" "What about your father?" "You know," whispered Ivory, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since I hit puberty, but I get letters all the time. He and mom split up, of course, and he's been wandering around too much for me to really see him. Last I heard, about a year ago, he was off in Berlin doing a report." "So your father's in Europe?" "I'm guessing. Mom just screams when I ask about him, and he never gives me an address, not even an email address. But he was like my hero when he was still here; mom says, or yells, I'm more like him than her. I guess that means he's a real womanizer!" Ivory laughed, apparently not bothered by the idea at all, and Ancelin replied as always, quietly. "My dad," she said after a lull, "you already know about." "Oh yeah. Still incarcerated, huh? Well good riddance. If I ever saw the bastard, I'd deck him. How dare he hurt two such wonderful women! Your mom's better off without him." "Can't disagree. I do find it a little odd that she seems happier with Kiki, but...it's her life, and I'm happy too. She chose right for once." "I'll say!" Ancelin chuckled and slapped Ivory again, then leaned in to kiss her cheek. Of course, Ivory squealed. Any attention like that made her melt on the inside, like nothing anybody else had ever done. Ancelin was just...indescribably good for her, like a breath of fresh air after being buried alive... When they made it to the house, still a little cold from the mid-December wind, Ancelin drew Ivory in for a hug and kept her in her arms. Ivory was stunned. She had never been so close to her new girlfriend before, so close that she could smell her and feel her shiver from cold and anticipation, never so intimate that she could feel so...secure, loved, regardless of her pride and lechery. Ivory sighed and, being shorter, rested her head on Ancelin's shoulder. "Come inside," she could hear her beloved whisper. The words uplifted her, reviving like a jolt of lightning, and she looked up to smile. Oh yeah. She was definitely taking her up on this offer. Madeline, Ancelin's mother, and Kiki her lover cooked dinner. The entire clan was there: Ancelin's uncle, aunt, and cousin as well, who had all noticed the change in Mrs. Yi over the past few months, and were glad she was finally starting to glow again. So what if the one she loved was a woman? As long as she was healthy and content, it didn't matter. Even her brother thought it was a good match—better than the last one. When it came time to do the dishes, Ancelin volunteered, and even though she was a guest, Ivory chipped in as well. "God, I wish I had your family," she sighed as she put dishes, cups, and forks into hot, bubbling water. "Mine is just messed up. My grandparents were cool, I hear, but they all died before I was born—gramps was a war hero, granny a war nurse. I don't have any uncles, aunts, or cousins, since both my parents were the only kids in their family. My mom's an asshole, dad's lollygagging in Europe, and I'm stuck here fucking up my life." "So you think you're life's a waste." "Not anymore; what I meant was before. Before, I was fucking shit up, but now I've got more of a purpose, a clear mind. Namely you." Ancelin gave a rosy smile, and started drying dishes. The Yi household had an automatic dishwasher, but the girls wanted to do things the manual way, since it seemed more intimate and...romantic. "Yeah... Believe it or not, I was really lost too, before you crashed into my life. I was depressed and aloof, and I barely had any friends. Close ones, anyway. I found myself becoming distant, a loner, the proverbial ice queen that so many people would come to identify me as. I certainly didn't think I'd ever be desired. Then beautiful you came around and tore all that nonsense to pieces." Ivory grinned bashfully. "You really think I'm beautiful?" "Yeah, of course." Ancelin trailed her hand down her girlfriend's long bleached-blonde hair, squeezing it gently like it was a bunch of spaghetti. She looked deep into Ivory's eyes, mischievous brown and heartwarming blue, and couldn't resist caressing the cheek that had held so many feisty smiles in its life. Ivory had felt such attention before, but it had never been so genuine, so pure and unconditional. It was love, she knew; Ancelin just had yet to say it. "So I'm grateful," she said, and resumed drying. "That's why I like you as my girlfriend. That's why I told mom I was gay, despite you being the only girl I've ever been attracted to. Of course, there's also that wild side of yours, which does drive me crazy now and then—in a good way." "Oh really?" Ivory gave a twisted smile, and weaseled her fingers over to Ancelin's ear. She tickled it until her girlfriend hissed. "Stop," she managed. Ivory leaned close and whispered. "Why?" "I'll lose my concentration." "Hmm, we can't have beautiful you breaking those dishes." "No..." Ivory released her fingers, kissed Ancelin's cheek, and licked her ear just for good measure. Ancelin gasped and dropped something, but thankfully it was plastic. "Are you girls okay?" called Madeline. Ancelin blushed as Ivory drew very close. "Um...yes!" A pause. "Okay! Take your time." "Mom!!" Ivory laughed along with Madeline; poor Ancelin was red in the face. And then... Why don't you stay over for the night? You mean sleep on the couch? No, you can share my bed. Evening temptations, indeed. Ivory accepted, of course, but... She did not want to ruin her relationship with Ancelin. She wanted to do everything right. When Ancelin offered to sleep with Ivory, she knew she didn't mean "sex". She meant "SLEEP", as in closing one's eyes and resting for eight hours. But Ivory was tempted, oh was she tempted! First, the urges came about during showering. As guest, she had first dibs, and coyly wondered if her beloved wanted to join her. Ancelin declined. "I'm not...ready yet," she whispered in a throaty voice. Okay. No problem. It was a little fast anyway. But when it came to Ancelin's turn, Ivory was severely tempted to open the bathroom door, just a crack—and then to step inside and gaze at the shadowy form of her nude girlfriend—and then to undress and open the curtain—and then... But she couldn't, she couldn't. She forced herself not to. She had to obey Ancelin's wishes. She wanted privacy, for now. She didn't want sex, not yet. All those things would come in time, but for now, "Annie" merely wanted to enjoy her current holdings. In other words, she wanted to experience the full joys of dinner before moving to dessert. As a child, Ivory always did beg for the sweet stuff first... The next problem came with evening wear. Ivory typically slept nude, and when there was no lover beside her, she usually pleasured herself. She knew she Could Not do such things in Ancelin's presence, probably not for a long time. Ancelin, for the record, had pajamas that loosely resembled her kendo uniform, but she didn't have any spares. Ivory took to wearing her underwear, sans brassiere—"It's so fucking uncomfortable to sleep in that thing!", she had declared—and a simple A-shirt instead, which was almost as good as nothing. Then, the moment of truth. Sharing a bed. Sleeping underneath the same covers. Being in close contact. With Ancelin. It was insane. It was worse than having an idea on the tip of her tongue, worse than knowing an answer and yet not knowing it, worse than having to wait for a free stall in the bathroom, even worse than feeling a sneeze coming while food was in her mouth. It was pain. Ivory feared for her life. Every movement would no doubt upset Ancelin and drive her out of her life forever. She could barely breathe, let alone sleep. Thankfully... "Hey, is something wrong? You look awful!" "It's...really unusual, being here like this," managed Tran, her voice tittering. "I mean, I've been dreaming about this moment ever since the first day I met you, literally, and now that it's here... I'm afraid of screwing up again. I wanna keep our relationship, because I really like you, and I don't wanna be apart from you again, but I'm afraid that if I even move...you'll just..." Ancelin silenced her girlfriend with a sweet, short kiss. "Ivory." "Yeah!" she whispered. Ancelin's eyes were so deep and expressive... "Hold me. Kiss me. Feel me." Ivory put her arms around Ancelin and squeezed her tight. She placed her mouth on the girl's beautiful two lips, the act she loved so dearly and intensely, and let them embrace countless times, sometimes with tears of joy. She felt Ancelin's breasts timidly poke out from her pajama top; she could feel the girl's legs twitching with the beginnings of sexual want; she could sense every curve, dip, and expanse of the young woman's face as she let her mouth touch upon it. She opened her lips to present her tongue; Ancelin declined and kept her mouth shut. "No," she whispered, "not yet." Ivory stopped. She was experiencing too much euphoria to care. "Sorry," she said with a grin. "Can't help it." "It's okay." And to prove that it was, Ancelin leaned forward and playfully licked Ivory's lips. Tran squealed in rapture and jerked back; the two embraced and rubbed noses lovingly. Ancelin licked Ivory's lips again, slower, and stared back with shimmering eyes. "Now lick mine." She needed no further invitation. Ancelin tasted...oh, better than anything or anyone she had known, even better than papa's cooking at nine in the morning. Ivory felt her womanhood become moist simply because she was running her tongue over Ancelin's closed mouth, so she stopped after awhile and caught her breath. To further "torture" her, Ancelin licked her own lips, sucking in all the little trails of saliva Ivory had left. It was pretty much better than sex, she had to admit. "You wanna...?" she inquired. Ancelin shyly held back. Ivory did love the girl's bashfulness; it made her seem so cute and vulnerable! "I...uh... If you promise to...you know." "You trust me, right? Right?" "Of course. Just...uh...um, I'm sorry. I shouldn't doubt you." "It's okay." Ivory kissed her cheek. "You don't have to." But...I want to. She surprised her girlfriend by slowly pinning her down, leaning over, and painting her lips with her tongue. Ivory was taken aback as she felt Ancelin's palms clasp over her wrists, like some gentle dominatrix, and the feeling intensified as the girl's hot pink tongue touched her lips. Ohh...! Was she tempted to stick her own tongue and ravish the other girl, but! She Could Not. No, she must not. She would not. "Annie," she squeaked as her girlfriend released her. Ancelin smiled and wiped the tears away. "That's enough, I think. I'm tired now. Do you mind?" "No, it's fine. It's perfect, actually." She grinned. "Well, wo ai ni, Ivory." "What!" Had Ancelin said what she thought she said?! "Wo ai ni," she repeated. "You said it meant good-night, right?" "...Huh? Hey, wait—you remember?!" Ancelin smiled and nodded; Ivory clutched her mouth in surprise. Ancelin had remembered what she said on their first date! It was a sweet gesture, but Ivory had to tell her the truth. "Uh, Annie," she chuckled nervously, "I have a little confession for ya. Wo ai ni, in Chinese Mandarin, doesn't mean good-night." "What does it mean?" she asked neutrally. Ivory grinned sweetly and caressed her face. "It means... 'I love you'." Ancelin stared at her silently for a very, very long time. "So even back then...you knew? For sure?" "Yeah," she whispered. Ancelin smiled sweetly, and drew her girlfriend in for a deep, passionate kiss. Her eyes brimmed with happy tears as she touched Ivory's face with all the love that she herself had brought out. "Ivory," she murmured, "je'taime, Ivory." "What's that mean?" Ancelin grinned. "It means......good-night." For a moment, Ivory was lost. But then, the full scope of what Ancelin had said hit her, and she burst open with love and tears and a wailing voice overwhelmed with happiness. She embraced Ancelin and they kissed; it was an hour before they finally went to bed, happy and in love, wrapped safely in the security of their arms. Next chapter: Evening Eternal
Back to All Girls School Index - Back to Original Fiction Shoujo-Ai Fanfiction