A Thousand Years of Prayers (part 4 of 5)

CHAPTER 04: THE ARC OF THE SILVER MOON

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Meiji Era twenty-fifth, fourth month, fifteenth day,

Dear Nikki-chan,

It was a week into the eleventh month when I hit rock bottom, when I thought there was no way in hell my life could get anymore depressing. I happened to be in my room one cold, snowing morning, reading a book I bought from town a while back, when she swept in with a grim look on her face. Of course, I immediately put down the book, got up, and walked toward the door, hoping fervently in my mind that I could get away before the grief took over. Koto-chan never made any move to stop me, but she suddenly started talking before I stepped past the opened shoji door.

“I just received an urgent message from Kokuin Jinja,” she said quietly. Kokuin, a Shrine dedicated to Tsukiyomi the Goddess of the Moon, belonged to a town named Kiyozumi, a little more than twenty miles to the west of Unomichi. “Kokuin is in grave danger, and their Chief Priest is sending out requests to every Shrine in the neighborhood for reinforcement. I... will leave in a minute.”

“Is that so…” I replied, my voice equally quiet, my hand trembling on the edge of the shoji door. My eyes grew teary, my heart convulsed, and my feet ached to run off. I thought that should I linger, I might just burst into tears.

“Yes, a demon legion is marching toward Kokuin as we speak,” Koto-chan said, and my eyes went wide. “Two days ago, their Chief Priest received a letter from the infamous Kugimiya Crow Demon Clan,” the name made a lump of something rise in my throat, “who threatened to obliterate Kokuin unless the Priests handed over their goshintai, the sacred bow Gingetsu no Kosen. The whole Shrine voted… against it for they fear the demons would use the bow to wreck havoc upon the human world. So, Hikari-san, I must go and aid them before it is too late.”

Footsteps quickened toward me. Next I knew, Koto-chan had already hugged me from behind. Her chin was rested on my shoulder, her arms placed around my waist, and her lips were right next to my ear. My heart jumped into my throat.

She whispered, “I do not know what I have done to make you hate me so… but Hikari-san, you will always be the most important person in my life no matter what.” Pain flowed in her cracking voice, despair filled her trembling words. Droplets of water fell upon my cheeks. They were hot, and they tasted of salt when they rolled into my opened mouth, which had opened in shock as soon as I felt her touch upon my body. The raven-haired girl was crying. “If the Gods have been listening to my prayers, they will keep you away from harm. Farewell, and may you find happiness.” As soon as her soft, moist lips pressed against my cheek, they were gone. Koto-chan rushed out of my room, the part of her face below her wet obsidian eyes was hidden behind the fabric of her long, wide sleeve.

At my doorstep, in stunning silence, I stood, thoughts whirling in a violent maelstrom in my mind. Kokuin Jinja had no chance of winning the battle, even with the help from other Shrines in this northern island. If Karasu was to be trusted, the Kugimiya, one of the most powerful clans of the demons, had enough manpower to rid Hokkaido of the humans twice over and then some. Of course, Gingetsu no Kosen, the bow that unleashed a volley of magically wrought arrows with just a single shot, was a formidable weapon but I didn’t believe the Arc of the Silver Moon could save the Shrine from its destruction.

Only then did the full weight of the matter hit me. My beloved Koto-chan the Priestess was going to fight a losing battle... one in which she could lose her own life… and she knew it. My heart sank at the thought.

“DON’T GO, KOTO-CHAN!” I cried as I hurried out of my room, hoping that I could talk her out of going. I was too late. What I could see while standing at the Main Gate to Furisame Jinja was my beloved’s slender figure with Sennen no Inori clutched in her hand, leaping from one treetop to another above Kagemori Forest, heading toward Kiyozumi.

“COME BACK, KOTO-CHAN!” I screamed. Yet no matter how hard I did, my voice still failed to reach her. She only leapt forward, apparently unaware that I was begging her to stop. Blood froze in my vein, and my internal organs seemed to have turned into ice as I watched her shadow disappear into the flurry of the falling snow. I buried my face into my hands and wept.

The following days went by with the speed of a turtle as I listened for news of Koto-chan in Unomichi. Of course, everybody in town knew about the story behind the raven-haired girl’s sudden disappearance; bad news traveled far, and fast. The townsfolk didn’t take it quite well. Actually, that was an understatement. They nearly bloody caused a riot in Unomichi the very evening after Koto-chan’s departure. They knew a battle was taking place not very far from their beloved town, so obviously they were worried if they were going to be dragged into it. Those people gathered in a large crowd in the Town Square, under the assault of the heavy snow, and argued for the whole night what they were going to do to prevent Unomichi from being burnt to ashes.

Some were of the opinion that they should build some sort of defense around town, perhaps higher wooden walls or watch towers, as if it could help save them from a demonic attack. Some suggested that they flee to safety in another town to the east until the danger had passed. That was met with fierce opposition. Many people in this town had spent too much time living here to even want to abandon it. In the end, they all agreed on the decision that they would stay in this town no matter what, and if the demons were going to come here, they would seek sanctuary within the sacred barrier of Furisame Jinja.

I had no problem with that. Nikki-chan, what truly enraged me was the fact that while the townsfolk were discussing seriously, a few people blamed their Chief Priestess for forsaking them in such a time of need. They went on at length about how she should have stayed here in Unomichi, protecting them, keeping them safe. They shut up when I rounded on them, asking them in a menacing tone if they were capable of showing more human compassion instead of selfishness for the poor people of Kiyozumi, who were going to lose more than just their houses or properties before the battle was over. They looked at me the way they would a monster afterwards, but I hardly cared. Nikki-chan, those same people had been the first to flee from Unomichi before there was any indication that the demons were coming to destroy it.

Of course, there were others who followed suit, leaving behind everything they had built their entire life to seek safety. Every day, as I stood by the window on the second floor of the Colonization Office, right outside the Mayor’s study, I saw them departed through the Eastern Gate, carrying along wagonloads of luggage. I paid them little attention. I was there because it was the place where news of Koto-chan, if any, would come to first. You know ne, Nikki-chan, Sadamoto Shun'ichi himself sent spies to Kiyozumi so he could have a clear grasp of the situation, and would know if it was getting dangerous.

On the third day since the news of the demon legion and Kiyozumi, the spies came back for the first time. They told me that the battle had not broken out yet, that every people in Kiyozumi had been evacuated either to other towns – many of them did come to Unomichi – or to the secret hideouts deep in Asahi Mountain, and more than a hundred exorcists from all around Hokkaido had gathered in Kokuin Jinja. My Koto-chan was one of them. She was still safe. I had been so relieved hearing that.

On the fourth day, Kugimiya Karasu became aware of the fact that I had been spending most of my time in the Colonization Office. He summoned me to his usual spot in Sengimori Forest, face a mask of fury.

“Why are you lazing in town?” he demanded heatedly. “Why aren’t you in Furisame, getting me the sword?”

“She brought it with her,” I answered in a half-hearted tone. “How am I supposed to get it for you?”

“Oh.” Karasu’s anger deflated immediately. He looked seriously down. “I see.” He almost sounded rueful.

“Karasu,” I said. “Does the battle have anything to do with you?”

“Nope, kiddo.” The demon sighed. “I didn’t even know of it until this morning.”

“Forgive me if I’m wrong, but isn’t your family name Kugimiya?” I glanced at the man, who scratched his head in embarrassment.

“Anyways.” Karasu cleared his throat. “It turned out that a half-brother of mine was behind it. What was his name again, I wonder….” He ruffled his head in somewhat of frustration. “Ugh, can’t remember! Sometimes I wish Pop hadn’t had so many children… or wives.”

“Why did he want that Gingetsu no Kosen bow?” I asked.

“Same reason I want Sennen no Inori, I’d say. Not many of us siblings like the way Pop refuses to step down from the throne, you see. Someone else must be trying the same thing in a different part of the country, I think.” He barked a mirthless laughter.

“And your dad is fine with it?” I said incredulously. “Or is it that he’s oblivious to what’s happening the way you were?”

“Nah.” Karasu gestured his hand dismissively. “He knows. He only pays us no mind. Said it amuses him to watch his children trying to take him down. I think he’s crazy.” The man rolled his eyes.

I left the crow demon shortly and returned to the Colonization Office afterwards.

Two days later, Sadamoto Shun'ichi’s spies came back with a devastating piece of news. The battle was over, Kiyozumi destroyed, and Kokuin Jinja leveled to the ground. The demon legion had emerged victorious, with the exorcists being slaughtered to the last man standing. Bodies, demons, Priests, and Priestesses alike, littered the earth, their blood dying crimson everything in sight. They told me that there was no chance whatsoever that my beloved Priestess could live. On my knees, I begged them to come back to Kiyozumi and searched for my Koto-chan. They only looked at me with a commiserating look on their faces and promised me they would. I never saw them ever again.

While the townsfolk were rejoicing in the street under the falling snow – after all, the army legion had withdrawn to the place from whence they came; nothing could threaten the peace of Unomichi any longer – I returned to Furisame Jinja, heart heavy, eyes wet with tears. I didn’t believe what the spies said, for I knew the Priestess Fuyuu Kotonoha wouldn’t die so easily, not when she had more than once demonstrated to me her godly strength. I resumed my activities in the Shrine as if nothing had happened, patiently waiting for my Koto-chan to come back. Every morning, I would go to the Hall of Worship to kneel before the altar of Susanou no Mikoto, praying that he would keep my Koto-chan safe. Every evening, I would cook enough food for two people, put two sets of bowls and the chopsticks on the table. Then I would come into her room, lay out the futons, prepare clean yukata, and stay there until I fell asleep.

I considered going to Kiyozumi myself to look for Koto-chan, then firmly rejected the idea. The raven-haired girl could be on her way back already, I thought. If I left Furisame, there was a possibility that I would miss her. It was best that I remained in the Shrine and waited.

One day passed. Two days passed. Three days passed. Then a week went by without my beloved Koto-chan showing up. Like the moon on high, my hope waned. Like the tide after having reached its peak, my confidence receded. By the end of the final day of the third week, despair and grief were all that were left in me. It didn’t quite help that Kugimiya Karasu decided to summon me to Sengimori Forest the next evening and told me that the Priestess was dead, that I was free to go wherever I wanted as long as I stayed the hell away from him. I screamed at his face and named him a liar. He glanced at me coldly and threw me a piece of cloth stained with blood. It was the handkerchief I returned to Koto-chan before she left for Kokuin Jinja. The world went deathly silent around me.

“I found that in Kiyozumi,” he said. “In a corpse wearing a Priestess robe that has the insignia of Furisame Jinja.” I felt as if something had struck me between the eyes. I staggered backward and had to lean my back against a tree trunk to be able to stand on my feet. “That corpse didn’t have any head but I seriously doubt that wasn’t Fuyuu Kotonoha.” He flapped his black wings and rose into the sky.

Despair turned into lava-hot anger. I stormed back to the Hall of Worship in the Shrine of the Falling Rain, where I spent more than an hour throwing insults at the altar of Susanou no Mikoto, yelling at the deity for not protecting my beloved Koto-chan, his faithful Priestess. If he was angered, he showed no sign of it. Lightning didn’t come from the snowing sky to strike me down when I left.

Grief invited heartbreaking pain. I came into the raven-haired girl’s room and sat down beside the futon I laid out for her before I received the summons from Kugimiya Karasu. I held the bloodstained handkerchief to my heart and cried.

I cursed myself for having acted so coldly toward Koto-chan before she left. I berated myself for making her cry. I hated myself because I spurned her love. As tears flooded out from my eyes and rolled off my cheeks, it dawned on me that my existence bore no meaning without the raven-haired girl by my side, that she alone brought colors to an otherwise dull, gray world. I started to slap my own face repeatedly for being so foolish, for having been so hung up on the fact that her heart always belonged to the real Amano Hikari while it was me to whom she showed her love in the end. I told myself that if I had another chance, I wouldn’t care about that little detail anymore. If the Gods of Heaven somehow returned Koto-chan to me safe and sound, I would try to make her the happiest person in the world.

The Gods gave me a chance to fulfill my promise.

“Why are you crying, Hikari-san?” a melodious voice that I knew too well, said. A girl was standing at the opened door and looking at me with a puzzled expression, body clad in an outfit that I would see on any normal girl in town, long dark hair tied into a braid that hung at her front. I couldn’t recognize her face, but I did her voice, for there was no doubt it belonged to Koto-chan, the girl I loved. Her right hand rose to her forehead, altering her features as it went. A second later, Koto-chan’s stunningly beautiful face looked at me with a small smile decorating her lips. “Where did you get that handkerchief?” she asked as she sat down next to me, where she untied her hair and let it fall in a glossy stream behind her back. “I thought I lost it in Kiyozumi.”

“Koto-chan!” I cried. The raven-haired girl didn’t have time to react before I threw my arms around her and wept openly into her bosom. “Koto-chan! Koto-chan! Koto-chan!” I called between the sobs, my hands gripping tightly the clothes on her back, my tears seeping into her front. She didn’t do anything at first, perhaps stunned by my reaction, but after a minute or so of listening to me crying her name over and over, she put one hand on my back, the other on my head, and pulled me into an intimate embrace.

“Thank the Gods,” the raven-haired girl murmured in a tearful, shaking voice; long, slender fingers ruffling my head. “You finally talked to me again. I am so glad.” I only cried my heart out in the warmth and comfort of her arms.

The hurricane of emotions in my soul gradually weakened; my crying eventually ceased. Yet even when the tears had stopped flowing, I didn’t move away from her, nor did I lessen my grip. I clung onto to her soft body harder than ever and pressed the side of my face against her heart, feeling as though I would die were I forced to leave her arms. Koto-chan didn’t have any problem with that. With both of her hands then settled upon my back, fingers laced together, with her chin atop my head, she gave me the full account of her battle in Kokuin Jinja.

As I had predicted, Kokuin Jinja never had a chance against a legion to begin with, especially when that legion consisted of more than five thousand crow demons, fully armed and armored. All Kokuin had, on the other hand, was a little less than a hundred Priests and Priestesses. The outcome had already been decided the very moment the force of darkness arrived at the town. Despite the fact that all the exorcists were powerful, the tide of the battle could not be turned. One by one the exorcists fell. One by one the houses of Kiyozumi were reduced to dust. Relentlessly, tirelessly, and mercilessly the demons advanced. The Arc of the Silver Moon was as good as their demon Commander’s.

Since the Chief Priest of Kokuin Jinja decided that they would never hand Gingetsu no Kosen to the demons no matter what, there were only two options left. One: they had to destroy the bow, and two: they had to find a way to carry the bow to safety, a place where people would not use it for evil purposes. They picked the latter. There was but one problem. The demons had had the town, and the Shrine completely surrounded. It had to take someone of great skill and power to pull off such a stunt. They picked Fuyuu Kotonoha. She agreed without a word of protest. I think she was aware that out of all the exorcists, she was the only one who could accomplish the mission.

On the way out, Koto-chan observed that her Priestess outfit would not blend in well with the environment and would no doubt hinder her objective. Conveniently, there was a corpse of a beheaded girl nearby, so she swapped their clothes and continued with her mission, completely forgotten about the fact that the handkerchief she cherished was in side the pocket of her old clothes. However, even after the demon legion had withdrawn, they still placed a heavy number of scouts and search parties to scan the area for the goshintai of Kokuin Jinja. Having been forced to avoid them – killing any would risk being found out and jeopardizing the mission – she had had to lay low in the region while being extremely mindful of where her feet landed. She had to make a lot of detours, too. That was the reason why it took her three weeks to return to Furisame Jinja despite the short distance between what was once a prosperous town named Kiyozumi and Unomichi.

I thumped a fist upon Koto-chan shoulder as soon as she finished talking.

“What was that for?” she said, bewilderment blended with surprise touching her voice.

“For worrying me,” I mumbled against the fabric of her clothes, voice uneven, eyes still wet. “For making me cry. I thought you were dead.” I gave a slight shiver at the word and burrowed deeper into her embrace. She smelled of blood and sweat, and her clothes weren’t exactly clean, but there was no other place I preferred to be.

“I did not think you would care,” Koto-chan said, sounding as though she couldn’t believe her ears. I thumped her shoulder again, this time a little bit harder. She grunted, but made no attempt to stop me from hitting her a third time. “The way you acted as if I were a thorn beneath your foot before I left for Kiyozumi, I thought you would be better off without me.”

“Wrong,” I muttered. “Without you, there’s no reason for me to continue to live.”

Silence.

“Is that… a confession?” the raven-haired girl asked, voice breathless.

“No, that wasn’t.” I raised my head and looked up into her beautiful obsidian eyes. “This is,” I said softly. “I love you, Koto-chan.” Having heard that, her eyebrows almost shot off her scalp while her mouth dropped open. I merely drew closer as my hand worked their ways up her front and placed upon her cheeks. A fraction of an inch separated our noses, a little more were between our lips. Judging by the panicking gleam I saw in her eyes, I believed she knew I fully intended to get rid of that fraction. Her complexion reddened so rapidly I half expected to see steam coming off from her ears.

Wondering to myself how the Gods could have created a girl that could look so adorable, I fastened my arms around her slim waist, closed the distance, and engulfed her lips with mine. Her body stiffened, her arms tensed, and her hands clawed at my back in shock. A moment passed before she yielded her lips to me and returned the kiss. Of course, she kissed me once before at the Yamazaki’s residence but it was merely a forced meeting of lips that was devoid of any scrap of feeling on my part. I didn’t particularly enjoy it in any case. This, however, spread a gentle wave of warmth across my body and filled me with a sensation that was more blissful than anything I had ever experienced. I couldn’t have been happier in my entire life.

My grip tightened around her body, and hers mine, as we pulled toward one another as close as possible, as I savored each and every second of a kiss that I never wanted to end, as she tried to cover as much of my lips as she could while managing to be fierily passionate and utterly gentle at the same time. When we broke apart – it was her choice rather than mine; had I had my ways, I would never have stopped – I immediately wanted to pull her in once more. Yet I froze. She was crying. I stared, tongue tied in a knot. Tears, large, round, and shiny like the morning dew on the leaves under the sunlight, only showed a different aspect of her beauty. Will she ever look not pretty? I’ll wager my life against it.

“I have been… waiting to hear those words ever since… I... met you.” She scrubbed at her eyes with her deceivingly dainty hands, trying to stop the flows of tears that were soaking her cheeks. Trying, and not quite succeeding. “When you… started ignoring me recently… I thought… I thought….” She couldn’t continue, for she had buried her face in her hands and wept.

Gently, I peeled Koto-chan’s hands away and cleaned up her tears with my lips. Then I pressed them onto hers, hoping I could stop her crying. My method worked. She melted into my embrace, and into the kiss. All she was able to muttered in the brief moments where we paused shortly to catch our breath was “I love you so much, Hikari”. At the back of my head, a small voice was reminding me that when she said “since I first met you”, she didn’t mean our meeting in the Colonization Office, that when she called Hikari, she didn’t mean me. I squashed the voice to a small buzz that faded away soon after. Of course, it did manage to stir up a little bit of irritation in me, but the soft and silky feel of the girl in my embrace was more than capable of making me forget about it.

After an hour or so, during which Koto-chan and I did nothing but exchanging kisses that could melt ice, I found her sagged against my body, cuddled tightly in the curve of my arms, tired and out of breath. I was in no better shape, though.

“Ne, Hikari?” Koto-chan asked, fingers tracing the line of the lapel of my yukata.

“Hmm?” I answered, my mind marveling at the intimacy with which she used to address me. She had never sounded more alluring, or as sweet. I didn’t have to be a genius to be able to realize that she was no longer talking to me as a close friend or her personal assistant. The distance we placed between ourselves, however little it used to be, was gone.

“How long have you been in love with me?” She was looking up at me with such an impossibly cute expression on her face that she turned the blood in my veins into condensed honey. She made me want to squeal.

“I think I fell in love with you from way back, when we attended Yamazaki Shizuka’s birthday,” I gave her a smile, “but I wasn’t aware of that until you kissed the girl.”

“I thought so.” She held a hand over her mouth and giggled softly.

“Thought so?” I arched an eyebrow at my new girlfriend. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I have known that I had a special place in your heart for a long time.” She raised her head to give me a quick, light peck on the lips. “And it made me very happy, dear my beloved one.” She settled her back against my curving arm, rested her head on my shoulders, and beamed brightly up at me afterwards.

“When did you… find out?”

“I would say ever since you started behaving strangely toward the merchant’s daughter and urged to make me reject her outright,” she replied. “I was not quite sure until you left me alone in Unomichi on that day, though.” Her hand rose to caress my cheek. “You were jealous, were you not?”

“I was,” I admitted, which made her smile again. I would do anything to keep her smiling all day, I thought at that moment. “It was painful, Koto-chan, seeing you kiss her. I thought you’d chosen her. It hurt a lot.” I removed her hand from my face and placed it over my heart. She went slightly pink at the touch. She didn’t take it back, though. “So don’t do that ever again, ne, or you’ll end up killing me someday.”

“I promise you I will not,” she murmured as she gave me a tight hug. Then suddenly something in what she had said earlier struck me.

“Wait a minute, if you already knew I was jealous when you walked into my room that day… which means….” I trailed off.

“Yes.” She dropped her eyes, her forefingers circling around one another, guilt plain in her reddening face. “I... I was aware that you were… not sick when you said so.” She meant that she knew I was lying. She was just too polite to say it right out. Well, no matter how she put it, she made my cheeks grow oven-hot in embarrassment. I drove a fist at her stomach, with as much force as I would employ to hold a fragile egg, mind you. She laughed.

Everything suddenly became crystal-clear. Of course, the reason why the raven-haired girl only warmed up to me until she knew for a fact that I was growing jealous of Yamazaki Shizuka was because that she feared if she got too close to me, she might not be able to control her behaviors and scared me away. She must have been trying to take the safe path this way and tried to wait for me to confess to her instead. The outcome had been devastating when she revealed her feelings to the real Amano Hikari after all. I but wonder how she could have rejected a girl so kind, so nice, and so beautiful like my Koto-chan, though.

I held my girlfriend closer and kissed her, all the while thinking that only a blind, deaf, and foolish person would fail to love the girl lying in my arms. After that, we simply enjoyed each other’s company – and evidently, another several kisses – until Koto-chan spoke in the end, “It is late already. You should go to bed, Hikari.” She sounded regretful.

“I should,” I murmured agreement. Still, I only hugged her much more tightly when she tried to untangle herself from me.

A few minutes passed in silence and comfort before the raven-haired girl spoke again, “I mean in your room.”

“You don’t want me to spend the night here?”

“I do!”

Her jaw dropped, her countenance the very mask of disbelief. I was under the impression that she had planned to say something entirely different, that the words had leapt off her tongue before she realized what they were. I chuckled softly as I leaned over and brushed my lips against the throbbing pulse on her neck. She very nearly purred, which came to me almost as a shock. “Well… go get your futon then,” my girlfriend cleared her throat and suggested.

 “I can’t sleep in yours?” Well, I admitted that it was something Yamazaki Shizuka would say, but unlike her, I did so strictly in private instead of blabbing it where people could hear. That had to be a better way… right?

“It is not… a really good idea… for us to share one,” Koto-chan hesitated. Her protest held so little weight I didn’t believe she meant it. “I... I tend to cling to things in my sleep.” Not a very convincing explanation, I tell you, Nikki-chan.

“I don’t mind.” I laughed. “In case you haven’t noticed… I love snuggling beside you.”

“I snore very loudly!” she said. She was lying. My room was next to her, and I never heard the slightest noise when she was asleep.

“I don’t care. I’m a heavy sleeper.” That was a lie, too, in case you’re wondering, Nikki-chan.

“And I drool in my sleep!” She had to be very desperate to have resorted to something as embarrassing as that.

“How cute!” I commented, and her eyes went wide.

What happened next? Well, she ran out of excuses.

“Are you not aware of the danger of sleeping cheek by jowl with me?” she muttered exasperatedly, hand scratching her head. “There... there is no guarantee that I... can control myself.”

“You won’t have to. I don’t need you to,” I whispered into her ear and smiled at the color dying her face beet-red. With my hand cupping her chin, I slowly lifted her face up so that I looked her straight in the eye. I moved in, attempting to taste once more the sweetness of her lips.

“I... I am going to take a bath!” she stuttered as she hastily scrambled away from me. Then she all but scurried out of the room, leaving me behind chuckling to myself and wondering perhaps for the hundredth time ever since I confessed to her what good deeds I could have done in my previous life to deserve Koto-chan in this one.

Upon her return, the raven-haired girl, cleanly washed and clad in a new yukata, found me sitting exactly where I was when she left, right next to her neatly laid out futon, smiling at her.

“Come here, Koto-chan,” I said, hand patting on the futon. My beautiful girlfriend blushed, appearing awfully reluctant to comply, but she did nonetheless. Once she had settled down by my side, I hugged her and kissed her with as much fervor as I did before she made her escape. There was no better means to convey to her my feelings, my desires, and my dearest wishes. My lips gently pulled at hers, urging hers to reciprocate. Much to my relief, they did. The raven-haired girl – every fiber of her existence was soaked in her sweet, fragrant scent – kissed me back in an equally passionate enthusiasm. I could tell; she wanted me in the same way I wanted her that night, perhaps just as much.

Our lips parted, hers issuing a soft, almost inaudible sigh while mine traveled upward to graze gently over the tip of her nose. Kisses rained on every bit of bare skin on her upper body that I could find, face, neck, throat, hands, and lips, the last being my favorite. As my gaze fell on Koto-chan’s bosom, heaving beneath the thin fabric that hid the majority of her slender frame, fire erupted from the pit of my stomach. My trembling hands tugged at her yukata’s lapels, pulling them down to reveal the snowy skin of her bare shoulders and the cleavage nesting between her firm, ample breasts.

My breath caught at the sight, a voice in my mind demanded me to pull the yukata further down to unclothe more of her most magnificently curvaceous figure, and my fingers itched to enfold those partly concealed orbs of flesh. I didn’t have a chance to obey, though, for Koto-chan had pulled her yukata back up with a quick motion of her hands. She hugged me tightly, trembling as though in fright. We remained that way for the next several minutes.

“What’s wrong, Koto-chan?” I asked.

“Nothing, nothing,” she said in a strained apologetic voice. “I just do not think… I... I can give you what you want tonight. I am sorry.”

“It’s alright,” I frantically assured her. “It’s my fault for pushing you when you weren’t ready. Forgive me, Koto-chan.”

Saying nothing, she gave me a mild, pure as spring water kiss, and lowered my body to the futon, where she continued to hold me in her arms for the duration of the night. I was puzzled, of course, seeing how her initial reactions clearly indicated that she was more than willing to give me all she could offer in both heart and body. But then, I didn’t have much time to give it serious thought, for as soon as we lay down, I found myself drowned in her pretty obsidian eyes that gazed lovingly at me, lost in the warmth that emanated from her soft body, and mesmerized by rhythm of her heart which sang within her chest in a quiet but alluring lullaby. Soon, sleep came to take both of us away.

 The next morning I awoke to a soft, affectionate “Hikari” issued from my girlfriend, who, as I noticed shortly after opening my eyes, was sitting by my sprawled figure on the mattress. The Priestess outfit she was in and the two trays of food – smoked fish, rice, and soup – sitting on the table suggested that she had been up and about for a while now. I looked at shoji door to my room, now opened to show the sight of the early morning sun, spreading its glorious rays upon our garden, the soils of which were covered by a blanket of snow at least one foot thick. Judging by its height in the sky, the globe of golden fire must have risen off the horizon for roughly more than an hour, which meant that Koto-chan had been awake for the same amount of time. The raven-haired girl had a habit of getting up at the first light of dawn; I had been living with her for far too long to not know that. The knowledge irked me a wee bit, though. To think that she had spent a good hour somewhere without me…. To think that I had been sleeping alone in bed for an hour without my beloved girlfriend….

Still lying on the futon, I extended a hand to Koto-chan. She took it gently in hers and held it in a way that would make any girl blush. She placed a light peck on each on the knuckles, too. That alone sent my heart into a gallop.

“How long are you going to stay there, my beautiful assistant?” the raven-haired girl said, her vacant hand tucking a few locks of stray hair behind my ears, fingertips leaving behind trails of fire across my face in the process. With my own hand, I drew her toward me and didn’t stop until I had her lying atop my body, hers locked in the firm grip of my arms. She, unsurprisingly, offered no resistance… even after I had rolled her around onto her back. She did, however, turned a little pink when I buried my nose into the crook of her neck, nuzzling it against her fragrant, silky skin. One by one, I placed kisses along her jaw line, at which point she started to squirm. Her hands were firm on my shoulders, ready to push me off, but I thought she was too busy deciding if she wanted my tender attention to remember that she had hands.

“The rest of the day,” I whispered into her soft, moist lips. “And you’re going to stay here with me.”

“But breakfast….” She froze dead in her track at a stare of feigned anger from me. Blood drained from her face. You remember, don’t you, Nikki-chan, that Fuyuu Kotonoha was a glutton through and through. If you told her that she could not have any one of her three meals, that wouldn’t be much different from commanding her to cut her wrist.... “I am sorry!” she said frantically. “I... I... did not mean that breakfast is more important than spending time with you. It is just that I... I... will not last through the day if I do not eat and… and….” Her voice faltered, for I had begun laughing so hard tears leaked from my eyes. Silently she crawled out from beneath me and sat up straight, back facing my direction, face the very picture of thoroughly mixed annoyance and embarrassment.

Mirth completely suppressed, I slipped my arms under hers and hugged her from behind. “You mad?” I said, my chin on her shoulder, my mouth next to her ear.

“Yes.” She pouted. “What kind of person would tease her own girlfriend so?”

“It’s payback,” I declared. “You deserve it.” I tried to sound solemn but my attempt was spoiled by a series of giggles that I couldn’t stop.

“What did I do?” Koto-chan frowned at me.

“You left me alone in bed,” I murmured. “I hate that, so unless you want to incur my wrath in the future, you will be there next to me when I wake in the morning.” I added with another giggle, “And you better be holding me, too.”

“You know… Hikari….” She stared at me, wonder lighting up her obsidian eyes. “There are sides of you that I never knew of. You are jealous, violent, and possessive to boot.”

“You got a problem with that?” I stuck out my tongue at her.

“I surely do not.” She shifted her body in my arms so that she faced me, her lips curving upward in a brilliant smile. “Those aspects only make me love you more.” She kissed me on each cheek. She made me beam like a fool at her. “Can I... uh… we have breakfast now?” she asked sheepishly afterwards, and became extremely relieved when I nodded. I would really love to know how she would have reacted had I stood my ground and deprived her of her meal but that would have carried the joke too far.

Nikki-chan, the time the two of us spent together after my confession wasn’t as perfect as I had hoped. We never displayed our affection in public, for one thing. It was inevitable that we longed for each other’s touch regardless where we went but my common sense of decency and Koto-chan’s bashfulness bound us more tightly than laws. We didn’t even dare hold hands, or look at each other for too long, on the streets of Unomichi, for crying out loud. Well, I admit that the fear that Kugimiya Karasu would learn that I had fallen in love with Koto-chan played no small part in it, of course. He might suspect that I had abandoned the task he had given me. That I surely didn’t want to happen.

Well, Nikki-chan, we did try to accommodate with the lack of comfort, which we were unable to give each other in Unomichi. Walking the streets, we would once every often let the back of our hands brush against one another’s, knowing full well that what we were doing were pretty much the same as drinking salt water in a futile attempt to ease our thirst. It was painful, almost unbearable most of the times, to act like employer and employee in front of other people despite the fact that we were helplessly in love. Of course, we never stayed in Unomichi a second more than we had to, and our feet were practically on fire whenever someone stopped us on our way home to ask for advice or favors. We, in particular, went out of our way to avoid the Mayor Sadamoto Shun'ichi. Once the stocky man flapped his tongue, he was about as easy to stop as any snow avalanche. No, I kid you not, Nikki-chan. Kugimiya Karasu’s secret lackey loves the sound of his voice, and it’s a well-established fact.

Well, once we had returned to our beloved Shrine of the Falling Rain, we were more or less inseparable. I would stay in her room, I would let her sit on my lap, and I would hold her tight while we whispered to each other our words of love and comfort. And we would kiss. I still can’t comprehend how swiftly time flowed by when we were doing that. There was this one miraculous time when we spent an entire evening doing nothing but making out in each other’s arms. Oh how Koto-chan had been shocked to the core of her existence upon realizing that she had not had anything to fill her stomach since lunch… that she hadn’t even remembered to buy ingredients to make dinner for both of us. It was little before midnight then, so there was no hope that she could make us something to eat. The raven-haired girl had burst into tears and didn’t stop crying until she fell asleep. I didn’t dare tell her that I was part stupefied and part amused, though.

Then New Year came along.

As you may have known about New Year, Nikki-chan, it was one of the most important holidays to the people and also a day where the people in a Shrine found themselves working at their limits trying to accommodate the faithful. That was exactly what had happened in our case. A day prior to New Year’s, Koto-chan warned me that although all I would be doing was sitting in a booth near the Main Gate and selling stuffs like hamaya – you know, the arrows that were embedded with enough holy powers to ward of minor evils? – and charms, I wouldn’t have a chance to take a breather.

She just had to be right.

The atmosphere in the Shrine was perfectly quiet and solemn – it was almost romantic with the snowflakes falling placidly down from the heavens – before the Main Gates opened at midnight… but when they did, chaos took control. People, swarms of people, streamed in from the large opening and gathered in an impossibly large crowd in front of my booth, crying, yelling, shoving money at my face, demanding to get what they needed. They made me wish I had ten heads, eleven pairs of lungs, and a dozen set of arms, really. Koto-chan told me later that it wasn’t just the people of Unomichi who went to Furisame Jinja, but others from neighboring towns as well. Some of them were originally from Unomichi, so regardless of where they had moved to, they would come back to the Shrine of the Falling Rain to worship Susanou no Mikoto. The rest… well, let’s just say that the name Fuyuu Kotonoha reached very far in this northern island. No, she didn’t tell me that; the visitors did. There was no way in hell Koto-chan, shy as she was, would speak of her own fame of achievements.

Anyways…. Those who were done at the booth proceeded to the Hall of Worship, where they tossed coins into the wooden saisenbako – the offering box placed in front of the Hall, below the thick white rope the upper end of which was attached to the bells – and offered the God their New Year’s prayers. Most, if not all, of the visitors would proceed into the Hall of Worship itself to bask themselves in the presence of Susanou no Mikoto, whom Koto-chan ceremonially and supposedly had invited to descend upon the mortal world. As to whether there was any sort of divine presence inside the Hall… I don’t know, and I don’t intend to find out. Me being a half-breed and all, I suspect neither Susanou no Mikoto nor I would be pleased should we be introduced to one another.

At the booth, it took what seemed like an eternity for the darkness to retreat toward the western sky, the snow stopped, and the sun reared its head over the horizon. It took another to see the sun on the run, leaving behind a third of the heavens dyed in the color of blood. As the darkness stretched across the sky, the stream of visitors swindled to a trickle and then vanished completely when all the stone lanterns in the Shrine had been lit. We closed the Main Gate, checked if everything was secured, then retired to Koto-chan’s room. It was rather dark outside so only after we walked into the pool of light the lamp on her table created did I notice that her face was rather red, her steps unstable, and her obsidian eyes gleaming with a strange light.

Before I had a chance to ask her if something was wrong, her Priestess robe and everything she wore beneath flew off her in a flurry. Caught by surprise, I immediately spun on my heels and turned away, my face a boiling kettle, my heart a beating drum. Standing there as if thunderstruck, I shuddered as the sounds of her undressing and redressing echoed endlessly in my ears and boiled my blood. I tried my best to resist it, but I couldn’t stop myself from imagining the sight of a naked Koto-chan, all curves and softness, sliding the cloth of a yukata over her snowy skin. I thought I nearly passed out from the sensation.

Once I was sure that she was done putting on clothes, I turned around and found myself at a loss for words. My girlfriend, in a white yukata the carelessly arranged neck of which exposed a good part of her bosom, had settled casually down the floor, back leaning against the wall, long slender legs – bared all the way to the lower part of her shapely thighs – stretching straight and making a V shape on the tatami mat. I blinked at her in shock. You understand, don’t you, Nikki-chan? Fuyuu Kotonoha the Priestess never stripped in front of anybody, including myself, and she certainly never sat in any other fashion save the seiza. I, with the merit of being her girlfriend and personal assistant, knew that much.

“Come, Hikari,” she said with an unusually cheerful voice “Hurry.” She sounded a child, one in high spirit at that.

“What’s with you, Koto-chan?” I asked curiously. “You’re behaving very strangely, you know that?”

“Do not be a spoilsport and come here, dear my beloved beauty,” she giggled while both of her hands rose steadily upward. A gust of wind coming from nowhere caught me in its clutches and whisked me to the space a foot or so directly above Koto-chan. Gently, it lowered me to my girlfriend’s welcoming arms and vanished.

“Caught you,” she murmured happily as she hugged me as tightly as possible. Then I caught a whiff of the smell that was coming from her rosy lips. I knew what it was. Sake. Rice wine.

“How much did you drink, Koto-chan?” I frowned at her.

“Err… probably four or five cups…?” the raven-haired girl answered defensively.

“Four or five!” I exclaimed. “You know better than anyone that you can’t hold the liquor! Why did you drink so much?” Yes, Nikki-chan, the truth is that the all-powerful Chief Priestess of the Shrine of the Falling Rain is extremely vulnerable against alcohol. Two cups are more than enough to make her tipsy. Four or five… well… four or five turned her into the overly cheerful girl I just described to you.

“Well, the Mayor and the elders in Unomichi insisted that we partake of the sacred miki wine.… I could not exactly refuse them, you see.” She shrugged, and I groaned.

The last time she got drunk prior to that incident, she had made a mess out of the Shrine. She threw up in several places, including her own room and the Hall of Worship, and sing for hours on end before fatigue knocked her out. The very next day she became bedridden, claiming that her head hurt as if needles were running rampant in her brain. Still… it failed to teach her a lesson.

“They’re going to get a piece of my mind next I see them,” I muttered angrily.

“Give over, my hot-headed girlfriend,” she giggled again.

The words which I wanted to say died halfway up my throat as the tip of the raven-haired girl’s nose rubbed against mine, her tongue licking my lips. Then she shoved it into my opened mouth and let it run rampant in there while she gave me a kiss so deep it curled my toes. I was under the impression that my face had gathered the scorching heat of a thousand suns. For all the kissing and cuddling we did before, she certainly didn’t do that. Moreover, the deathly shy Koto-chan I dearly love would never attempt such a daring thing. The alcohol had made her excessively bold….

“I missed you, Hikari,” she whispered into my ear. “I had wanted to come by and see how you were doing earlier but the people just would not let go.”

“I missed you, too, Koto-chan,” I confessed. Busy as I had been, selling arrows and charms to the visitors, there was no moment in which I did not want to see her face, hear her speak, and feel her touch. Spending nearly a day without her by my side was pretty much a torture. And of course, that being said, you know how I have been feeling for the last week, don’t you, Nikki-chan?

“A lot?” She laid me on my back, herself crouching on all four atop my body. Her face was red, her breath heavy, and her eyes, oh glorious obsidian gems more sparkly than diamonds, shone with what I knew to be love. My irritation at the fact that she had been drinking slipped away from my mind along with my self-control, which I had been trying to cling to desperately since the kiss. How could anyone resist Koto-chan when she looked so cute?

“A lot,” I agreed honestly. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” I cupped her face with my hands and added. “Especially when I’m with you.” Her expression grew more and more affectionate with my every word. She didn’t seem intoxicated anymore.

“Why?” she asked and attempted to look innocent. She failed miserably.

“Because I love you?” My response brought a delighted smile to her lips.

“I can never get tired of hearing that,” she murmured, her head lowering, her face approaching mine. “But then, how can I, when I cannot get enough of you?” She kissed me. As her tongue slipped past my lips once more to meet my own in a passionate embrace, the last few bits of self-control I managed to retain marched off to hell.

Arms winding tightly around each other’s body, we kissed over and over. The temperature of Koto-chan’s room seemed to have risen tenfold, the air shimmered with heat. For all I know, I could have been lying inside a burning house. Perhaps the spell the raven-haired girl wove to keep the Residential Area warm had gone haywire, perhaps it was just the constant desire for her that was raging like wild fire beneath my skin, or perhaps it was both. I didn’t really care which at that time. My attention was on Koto-chan and her alone. All my senses were devoted to her soft whimpers, her gentle yet electric touches, her overpowering scent, and her sake-sweetened tongue and lips.

My mind went wild.

In one way or another, I found myself lying atop her in the end, my hands laced in hers, my eyes glued at the nearly naked figure underneath. Thanks to all the tossing and rolling we did while kissing, my clothes had become a little bit disheveled, and Koto-chan’s almost undone. The sash, once tied casually at her waist, was lying a good two feet away from us; her yukata, the only piece of clothing she had on her then, barely covered a fourth of her skin, if that. Her breasts were entirely exposed along with her flat tummy and everything below her hips. You know ne, Nikki-chan, I usually caught myself thinking how Koto-chan looked without clothes but honest to the Gods above, what I could best conjure with my imagination could never come close to the perfection that was Koto-chan that night.

Well… true, I had always spent the nights in the raven-haired girl’s futon since my confession, but we did nothing except holding one another in our arms, once in a while sharing a few kisses, until we fell asleep. Much as I wanted to claim all of Koto-chan as mine, I never attempted to. She wasn’t ready, and both of us knew it.

Rational thoughts, common decency, and hesitation took flight when she took my hand and placed it on her left breast. Her firm flesh seemed to burn against my palm at the contact. She kissed me again. Driven by stark, lava-hot desire, I set out to receive what Koto-chan had willingly offered me that night. I broke away from her lips, to which she sighed most regretfully, and tasted every single inch of her slender shoulders and neck while my hand traveled further and further down south, fingertips trailing across her smooth abdomen. The reaction I got from her was more than just satisfying, to say the least. The way her body arched against my front, the way her arms tightened encouragingly around my neck, and the way she pulled my head up to let her mouth find mine in a kiss hot enough to make the sun seem warm all but cheered me on toward my destination. Yet… when my hand reached the soft flesh where her mesmerizing thighs joined her lower body, hell broke loose.

A flash of pure white light flung me away from my girlfriend and slammed my back painfully against the opposite wall. Air was driven out of my lungs as darkness shrouded my vision. It hurt so much that I couldn’t even scream.

When my sight returned, I saw that Koto-chan was sitting a several feet away from me, face painted with a look of utter confusion. At which point she noticed that I was hurt.

“Hikari!” the raven-haired girl screamed and ran toward me. “Are you alright?”

“I’m okay.” I winced. “But what was that light?” My ears were still ringing from the impact.

“What light?” she asked slowly.

“The one that came from your body.”

“My body?” Koto-chan repeated. She looked down and seemed to have noticed for the first time that the yukata hanging loosely on her shoulders left most of her unclothed. She gave a loud cry as she hastily pulled the yukata together to hide her front. That had been the moment I regained enough of my sense to realize that Koto-chan encouraged me to claim her earlier because she was under the effect of the alcohol coursing in her blood, and that I had but forgotten that she was drunk the moment she started touching me. Disappointment seized me, and I cursed myself for being such a weak-minded fool.

“Were we… were we….” Tying the sash – which she retrieved with a flicker of her hand – around her slim waist, my girlfriend didn’t sound like she could finish what she set out to say. I knew all too well what she was trying to, though.

“Yes. You were drunk, and I didn’t know what I was doing.” I nodded. “Don’t worry, though. I didn’t manage to… well… you know what I mean.” I let out a small, painful cry as I tried to detach my back from the wall. It hurt like crazy.

“I am sorry.” Koto-chan said frantically. “It was the defense barrier that Hiiragi-sama cast on me to protect my Innocence. I did not mean to hurt you.” Nikki-chan, Hiiragi Mikazuki was the Ise’s High Priestess, also my Koto-chan’s Master. Just a note in case you forgot.

“The one who has to say sorry is me, Koto-chan,” I said ruefully, pulling her into a tight hug. “I brought this on myself. I... I shouldn’t have tried to take advantage of you so. I’m sorry.”

“Do not say that,” she murmured against my chest. “Now that the defense barrier had cleared the alcohol for me… I remembered most of what happened. It was I who tried to seduce you in the first place.” Through the fabric of my clothes, I could feel her cheeks warming up. “It was my fault.”

“Not yours,” I corrected her. “Alcohol’s. It made you do crazy things.”

“Not really,” Koto-chan’s low, embarrassed voice was almost muffled by my yukata. “The alcohol only removed the restraints I put on myself. I did what I did because… I... I... really want you.”

“You do?” I breathed.

“I always do,” she confessed. I had the feeling that I was holding a burning log in my arm instead of my girlfriend. “You do not know how hard I have tried to suppress my craving for you, Hikari. There is nothing I like more than your touch; there is nothing I wish more than being able go the rest of the way with you…. It is regrettable that I just can’t right now.” Her voice turned mournful. “I am sorry.”

“Because of the spell your Master cast on you?” I asked quietly.

She shook her head. “It is nothing but a reminder. Should I choose to nullify it, I could do so any time I want. In fact… I almost did… several times during the last two weeks.”

“Then why…?”

“I would tell you, but I am sure it would make you angry,” she looked up and said. She seriously believed that. “I do not wish to have you angry with me.” She seemed so frightened at the idea that her slender frame started to tremble slightly in my grip.

“No matter what your reason might be, I won’t get mad at you,” I assured her, my hands roaming up and down her back in an attempt to sooth her. “Ever.”

“Promise me?”

“Promise.”

“Well….” The raven-haired girl cleared her throat. “I was trying to protect my powers. I am a Priestess, you see, so if I lose my Innocence, I will lose all my Priestess powers as well.” Of course, that would explain why my mother, also an Ise Priestess, couldn’t channel a whisker of magic after she was married to my dad. “I... I did not tell you before because I was afraid that you would think that I valued my Priestess status above you. That is not true, really!”

“I know, I know.” I chuckled softly. “You didn’t want to give yourself to me because you feared that you wouldn’t be able to protect the town in case something happened, right?”

“No…”she whispered. “I care not one bit about the town. I only want to keep you safe….” The warmth flowing in her voice spoke more than her words ever could. She moved me deeply.

“Koto-chan you dummy,” I said. “How can I get mad at you for something as reasonable as this? I do want to have all of you but not so much so that I can think of nothing else. I didn’t fall in love with you because I wanted to make love to you, you know.”

“I am sorry,” she murmured softly into my chest. “And thank you.”

“I think we already have enough excitement for one day,” I said after a while of cuddling her in comfortable silence. “Why don’t I lay out the futon for you to rest?”

“Actually, about that…” the soft, fragrant girl I was holding hesitated. “I hate to ask this of you but… would you sleep in your room from now on?” The shock that question sent my way was so great that it rendered me speechless. I tried to wiggle my tongue in a futile attempt to speak but my efforts in the first several minutes were in vain.

“Why?” I managed in a hoarse voice after a while.

“Because I am at my limits already,” She sighed. “I told you that I almost removed the spell Hiiragi-sama cast on me several times, did I not? My determination is wavering, and the control I have over myself is not as strong as it used to be.” Her hands reached up to caress my face. “Perhaps you are not aware, but I cannot resist you anymore.” I opened my mouth but she stopped me from speaking by pressing her forefinger gently against my lips. She proved that she could read my mind. “No, Hikari, it does not matter whether you make advances on me or not, for the problem lies with me,” she continued smoothly as though uninterrupted. “There were nights I lay awake, thinking to myself how beautiful your sleeping figure was, how much I wanted to have you lying naked against me, how much I loved to….” She stopped abruptly. “How vulgar of me, ne.” She chewed on her lower lips, face deep scarlet. “Please understand, Hikari.”

I didn’t want to, but I did.

And that was how I ended up sleeping in my own room that night and the nights that followed. I hated it, of course… but what could I do? Well, you know what, Nikki-chan, Koto-chan tried to compensate for the comfort that she denied me. She would try to be even more affectionate and loving than before, and she made me feel like an Imperial princess who was attended to twenty-four seven. It took me a lot of effort and time to convince her that she was making me very uncomfortable, that she should just treat me the way she once did. It really wasn’t easy.

Well, I think that’s it for today, Nikki-chan. I will see you tomorrow, ne.