The Brain and the Beauty (part 1 of 5)

a Non-Anime Fanfiction fanfiction by Ronin

Here before you, is my first Daria hentai (porn) of shoujo ai (girls 
loving girls) yuri (lesbian), so if some of you Daria stalwarts believe 
that concept of girls making love turns you off, don't bother. And for 
those of you that remain......... behold my dream pairing, since the 
days of Gystex' The Passion Club. Keep in mind that Daria and the gal 
she's earmarked to meet would NEVER do such a thing, but like they say, 
never say never.... after all, no one thought a Jane/Quinn pairing was 
possible, until along came Pseftis' Mornings Ever After. And how can we 
forget LyinTamer's forgettable Night Of The Storm--now THAT (the Daria/ 
Quinn pairing) is even more unlikely than the one I've got in mind. One 
could say that my story is my answer to Night Of The Storm, but without 
the incest--but, no........... 

Just advice is what I need, not flames. They could help if I should 
improve as I go along, eh? When it comes to love, almost anything is 
possible. 

Anyhow, my story is dedicated to Mike Yamiolkoski, Ruthless Bunny, Roger 
E. Moore, Martin J. Pollard, Brandon League, The Waco Kid, Chris Oakley, 
Gystex,Thea Zara, Kirsten Bealer, Scarlett, Deref and all the other 
Daria stalwarts that gave their all, or words to that effect..... 

--Ronin, a.k.a., Moron. 

ON THE FIRST DAY (A Bet's A Bet) 

On the first day of the week, in the halls of Lawndale High, it was 
business as usual for The Partners In Crime, a.k.a. Daria and Jane. 

"Did you see last night's broadcast of Sick Sad World?" asked Jane. 

"You mean the article on lesbians?" said the bespecticled cynic known as 
Daria. "Somehow that don't go in well with the stuff we all knew and 
loved--cheese fries, video game soundtracks, Sick Sad World, and glow in 
the dark stars and galaxies." 

"While we're on the subject," said the only friend Daria had, "I bought 
up a lot of those stick on glowing stars. I got plenty, so if you like, 
I can sell you a hefty quota for your ceiling--I've already placed 
several on mine, and it's like sleeping under the stars." 

"Sounds like something Quinn would do. But I'll give it a stab. How 
much?" 

"For you, true blue, not a thing." assured Jane. "So can you believe 
that lesbianism is universal among 48% among teenage girls per capita?" 

"They're all cuckoo," muttered Daria. "Any girl that loves girls is some 
kind of nut." 

"Like that Alison at the art colony--she almost turned me into one, 
given half the chance." 

"I remember Alison. She sure came close to seducing you, if not bringing 
out the lesbian within you--if any." 

Jane frowned. "If you had been in my shoes, she'd turn you into a lezzie 
to a tee." 

"Wanna bet, funny gal?" said Daria. "Me loving girls? No way." 

Not content with just irking her friend a bit, Jane asked, "Does that 
mean you've never kissed a girl? Not in the least even after you kissed 
Tom?" 

Shooting her partner in crime her meanest look, Daria stated, "There is 
NO WAY in hell that I am going to kiss a girl--not even if my life 
depends on it, not even if I was drunk, not even if I was paid to do so, 
not even if pigs fly--NOT AT ALL." 

"I hear and obey, Mon Capitane. So what do you wanna do when school's 
out?" 

Thankful that the change in subject had been noted, Daria replied, "I 
know they've just opened up that new hotel with the giant clock tower. 
They say it's on its way to becoming the 4th tallest building in 
Lawndale." 

Jane was surprised. "4th tallest building? Did they say what it was 
called?" 

"The Red Barchetta Hotel." 

"We're there, girl." 

Inside one of Lawndale High's ladies' bathrooms, Sandi waited for her 
fellow Fashion Club minions, a copy of the latest issue of Waif in one 
hand. From the hallway, the sound of Lawndale High's wall speakers, came 
the voice of Charles "Upchuck" Ruttheimer III broadcasting the school's 
radio program show: 

"Helllllllllo, all you dudes an' dudettes in Lawndale High. Have I got a 
tune for all you gals that were born to be-- rrrrrrrrrrrr, fiesty--Jill 
Sobule doin', I Kissed A Girl." 

Jenny came over and told me about Fred,
"He's such a hairy behemoth," she said.
"and dumb as a box of hammers,
but he's such a handsome guy".
And I opened up and told her about Larry,
and yesterday how he asked me to marry.
I'm not giving him an answer yet.
I think I can do better.... 

One by one, Sandi's fashion drones--Quinn, Stacy and Tiffany--entered 
the bathroom. 

"So, Sandi, what's the big dire dilemma?" said Quinn. 
"And why you called an emergncy meeting?" said Tiffany. 
"And why you said it was a state of emegency?" said Stacy. 

Opening her copy of Waif, Sandi stated dramaticlly, "It's THE MOST dire 
moment in our long history. I, like, just got my latest issue of Waif, 
and, suddenly, there was a major article on lesbians; according to the 
report, lesbianism is universal among 48% among teenage girls per 
capita. It's even worse in Lawndale's teenage girl community." 

"EW!!" said Stacy. "And you think there may be some in Lawndale High?" 

"Brr," said Tiffany. "Lesbians in Lawndale.......it's SO WRONG." 

So we laughed, compared notes....
we had a drink; we had a smoke, 
she took off her overcoat....
I kissed a girl.
I kissed a girl. 

"Just a moment!!" said Quinn. "You don't think there may be a lesbian in 
The Fashion Club?" 

"I hope not," said Sandi. Even so, her eyes still drifted from one girl 
to another. "And yet, I still ain't convinced." 

"It can't be me!!" said Stacy. "What girl in her right mind would love a 
crybaby like me?" 

"Can't be me, " said Tiffany. "People say I am so clueless and vapid." 

"Well, it sure couldn't be me!!" said Quinn. "Not with all the guys I 
date!!" 

"You don't know that," said Sandi. "I bet you're a bi on the side, 
meanin' you love both girls an' boys. And I wouldn't doubt it, huh, 
Quinn? You're S-O---------beautiful, you could make.....sigh..... 
anyone, girl or boy melt, with your long red hair, your sweet mouth, 
those entrancing brown eyes, your enticing face, and your gorgeous 
body......." 

She called home to say she'd be late.
He said, he worried but now he feels safe,
"I'm glad you're with your girlfriend,
tell her 'Hi' for me."
Then I looked at you,
you had guilt in you eyes,
but it only lasted a little while.....
and then I felt your hand above my knee.

"Now THAT I wouldn't doubt," said Quinn. "But what of you? You're just 
as sexy and gorgeous as me----and YOU never had a boyfriend." 
Her eyes narrowing, Sandi demanded, "QU-INN, you casting asparagus that 
I may be a lesbian?!?" 
"Well, I don't know.....There's a lot 'bout you that neither me, nor 
Stacy, nor even Tiffany know of....." 

"And you're saying to that effect, that I never even kissed a girl?!?" 

Quinn mulled over that before saying, "No........but the thought did 
cross my mind......" 

"Sandi never kissed a girl......," said Tiffany. "Imagine that." 

"Hooboy.......!!" said Stacy. 

And we laughed, at the world.
They can have their diamonds,
and we'll have our pearls.
I kissed a girl.
I kissed a girl.

"So, like, I never kissed a girl, big deal!!" said an irate Sandi. "All 
right....I'll bet that I CAN kiss a girl, here and now. Better still, to 
ante up the challenge, I'll bet my eyeshadow that I can kiss the first 
girl that steps in here." 
"But Sandi.....," said Tiffany, "not every girl here may be..... well, 
you know." 

"And what if you get sent to Ms. Li's office?" said Stacy. Sandi thought 
it over before replying, "Then it'll be a small price to pay for winning 
the bet. Agreed?" 

"Everyone knows you don't stand a chance," said Quinn, "but let's give 
it a stab. You got yourself a bet." 

"AAAA-MEN!!" said Stacy and Tiffany. 

But even so, Tiffany then turned to Stacy and murmured, "I got a bad 
feeling 'bout that...." 

"Poor Sandi....." said Stacy. "She's asking for trouble." 

Stacy was so right.......for outside, a few yards up the hallway, Daria 
and Jane were heading down that way. 

In fact, they entered the bathroom--and right before the surprised 
Fashion Club. In fact, you can imagine their shock upon seeing Daria and 
Jane enter. 

"Oh-oh," said Jane. "I sense trouble in paradise." 

"A close encounter of the Fashionista kind," agreed Daria. 

"Let's head to the next land of the talking toilets." 

So Daria and Jane started to depart-- 

--and Sandi called out, "Daria, wait." 

Surprised, Daria asked, "Now what? Don't tell me you spotted some 
Fashion Don'ts on me and Jane?" 

"It's more than that," stammered the brunette. Then, turning to her 
friend Quinn , she hissed to her, "Quinn!! Don't you know THAT is your 
geeky, brainy unpopular sister? And I should kiss HER?!?" 

"Th-think I don't know that?!?" said the redhead. "I don't like it any 
worse than you do--but you DID say you'd kiss the first girl that 
entered here--and Daria was the first." 
Sandi was agahst. "Must I........?" 

"A bet's a bet. For the sake of not only The Fashion Club, but for Stacy 
and Tiffany." 

For Sandi Griffin, it was a no win quandry. It was bad enough to kiss a 
girl to prove her bet with Quinn, Stacy and Tiffany, but the idea of 
kissing Quinn's geeky unpopular cynical sister, a. k. a. Daria was even 
worse. Her darkest hour. And right there before the rest of The Fashion 
Club. And the brunette was torn. If she backed out, she would lose the 
bet, not to mention her reputation. But if she kissed Daria, she'd never 
hear the end of it not only from the rest of The Fashion Club, but also 
from the other popular and snobby and cliquey communties of Lawndale. 
Worst still, it might sever the ties twixt her and the only friend she 
had--Quinn, who would rightfully never forgive the brunette, when it 
came to her best friend kissing her sister. 

Shaking her head in despair, Sandi muttered, "What did I do to deserve 
such a fate?" From there, she cupped Daria's surprised face and said, 
"Like, forgive me, Daria.......I hate what I've got to do, but I can't 
go back on my word to The Fashion Club--even if it means risking my 
reputation." 

"I take it you made a bet with them," said a nervous Daria. 

"Yup." 

Behind her, a quizzical Jane asked, "Hey high an' mighty Sandi The 
Griffin, what chuu got in mind for my friend here?" 

In reply, Sandi dredged all her remaining courage....before placing a 
big kiss on Daria's mouth--to the shock of Jane, Quinn, Stacy and 
Tiffany. And Daria as well. 

I kissed a girl, her lips were sweet
she was just like kissing me
I kissed a girl, won't change the world
but I'm so glad, I - I kissed a girl!! 

"Yipe!! I can't look!! EW!!" said Quinn. 

"Oh my, oh me....!!" said Stacy. 

"Unbelieveable.....!!" said Tiffany. 

"Momma, hold my hand!!" said Jane. 

At first, the feel of kissing another girl, Quinn's sister, a geeky 
unpopular brain, felt revolting, but for Sandi, it felt so good, like 
kissing a silken pillow, a sweet fruit, while the heightened sensations 
it brought stirred her whole body to a peak level passion from within. 

And we laughed, at the world.
They can have their diamonds,
and we'll have our pearls.
I kissed a girl!!
For the first time,
I kissed a girl!!
(And I may do it again!!) 

For Daria, the feeling of another girl--not to mention Sandi, the 
egotistical, snobby, cliquey, narcissistic head of The Fashion Club, and 
Quinn's best friend--thatfelt atfirst repulsive, so it was no wonder 
that the auburn cynic was trying to pull away, beating her fists at the 
brunette, who not surprisingly refused to let go, much less stop. But 
even so, not even a cynic like Daria could resist the overwhelming 
feeling of kissing a girl. Not since that first kiss with Tom Sloane, 
who was at the time, Jane's beau, had the auburn felt so high on 
emotion, her body tingling all over, feeling passive, wanting to fall 
limp and drift into a vast fog bank, high above the clouds. There WAS 
one difference--while Tom's way of kissing was muscular, Sandi's was 
soft and sweet, with the taste of strawberry, like dew on rose petals. 
As such, despite herself and her better judgement, Daria found herself 
kissing back, almost drawing herself close to the Fashion Club brunette. 

I kissed a girl!!
I kissed a girl!!

I kissed a girl; her lips were sweet,
she was just like kissing me,
but then; I kissed a girl,
I kissed a girl.....

Kissed a girl, won't change the world,
but I'm so glad,
I kissed a girl!!
Kissed a girl....
kissed a girl....

All so soon, it wasn't until Daria and Sandi came back to their senses, 
and broke off the kiss, stepping back, their faces almost in shock. 
Quinn was shaking her head in disbelief, Tiffany was muttering, "Oh, 
wow.....", Jane was half surprised and half amused and Stacy had her 
eyes stretched as wide as two wheels. Finally Sandi pulled herself 
together, went to one of the sinks, pulled a traveler's bottle of 
Listerine, gargled, then turned to the others and demanded, "Well?" 

"I wouldn't've believed it if I hadn't seen it," said Tiffany. 

"WOOOO-------------OOOOW....!!" said Stacy. "You won the bet...." 

"Oh boy.....!!" said Jane. Then turning to her partner in crime, she 
asked, "Hey Daria, how's if feel to kiss a girl?" 

In a trance like way Daria replied, "What a long strange trip it's 
been." Then shaking herself out of it, she went to one of the sinks and 
gargled and washed her face before saying to Jane, "Did I.....? 

"Yup," said the artist. 

"Shades of Jill Sobule--I kissed a girl...." 

Staring at the least of The Fashion Club's members, Sandi spoke crisply, 
"OK, I won the bet, so you two hightail it to the cafeteria, and save me 
and Quinn a table!! Get going!!" 

Nodding in reply, Stacy and Tiffany headed out the door before Quinn 
turned to her friend and asked, "You OK, Sandi?" 

"Couldn't be better, Quinn," was the reply. 

"Sandi......I just couldn't believe you went through and kissed a girl, 
not to mention my cous--er, my sister." 

"Neither did I."Then, giving the redhead her most strictest look, the 
brunette added, "Like, as of right now, I am calling for another state 
of emergency. Now that we got what we came for, I want you, Tiffany and 
Stacy NOT to breathe a word regarding what just went on here. I've got 
reputations to protect--not only for me, but also for The Fashion Club. 
Understood?" 

"Absolutely," said Quinn. "I'll get it through to them." 

"Fine." Then turning to Daria and Jane, Sandi said, "And that goes for 
you too. Like, I got a reputation here, and the last thing I want is to 
lose it." 

"We hear and obey, O most exhalted potentate," said Daria in her deadpan 
way. 

"OK, boss," replied Jane. 

Nodding to each other, Sandi and Quinn left the bathroom-- though not 
before the brunette turned to the auburn cynic and said, "Like, I didn't 
think brains like you could kiss." 

As soon as they could, Daria and Jane went to each one's toilet stall. 

Little did Daria and Sandi know that even while they acted like the kiss 
they shared never happened, their troubles were far from over. For in 
kissing each other, they had triggered long hidden passions, if not the 
lesbian, if any, within themselves. Two girls, with two different 
lifestyles, two different ways of life, and two different personas, as 
well as two different reputations. One cynical, brainy and unpopular, 
and one popular, shallow cliquey Princesslike stuck up diva. For Daria 
Morgendorffer and Sandi Griffin, far worse was in the works for 
them......... 

Many hours later, Daria, Jane and Tom were standing on Dega St., 
observing Lawndale's 4th wonder--the 30 level (story) white stucco and 
plaster high rise building known as The Red Barchetta Hotel. Its base 
spanned four city blocks, there was a fountain located between the steps 
that led to the main entrance, but the main attraction was 
understandably the clock tower itself; its roof, made of Spanish tile 
roofing, showed one huge bell, surrrounded by a series of carillon 
bells. The clock face, on all four sides of the tower, had normal, NOT 
Roman, numbers done in a University type font, with wrought iron like 
clock pointers, and, in the upper part of the inner circle of the face, 
was a second hand, in its own face, counting down the seconds, just like 
on a grandfather clock type face. Across the front of the concrete 
canopy which was over the driveway and the main entrance, were the words 
in colored neon, on a black background: THE RED BARCHETTA HOTEL. Not 
surprisingly, the hotel stood across the street from The Zen, where 
Daria and co. stood. 

"What do you think, Daria?" asked Tom. 

"A bona fide Michelangelo," replied the auburn cynic, "and I don't mean 
the turtle." 

"I'd like to see any giant monkey climb THAT building," said Jane, 
laughing. 

"It took a lot of money to build that, and just to prove," said Tom, 
"that even Lawndale can rate a high riser building. You should hear the 
carillon bells; they play a great Whittington melody." 

"Turn again, turn again, Lord Whittington, Mayor of Londontown," said 
Daria. 

At that moment, Brittany, Kevin, Jodie and Mack came on the scene. 
"Well, if it ain't the four skinnies," said Jane. 

"Ha ha, Jane," said Brittany. "So, what do you think of the new hotel?" 

"It's got to be THE coolest building, anywhere in Lawndale, don't you 
think, Michael?" said Kevin. 

"Michael?" said a surprised Mack. "What ever happened to Mack Daddy?" 

"You told me not to call you that, bro." 

"Well, at least NOW you're showing sense." 

"Hey, that clock's ready to strike," said Jodie. 

It was true. The second hand was counting down the seconds, and then it 
hit the number 60 (or was it 00?), and at the same moment, the hour hand 
touched the number 4. Instantly the carillon played the full Whittington 
melody before the huge bell rang out four times. That was when Trent, 
Jesse, Nick and Max, a. k. a. The Criminales, a. k. a. Mystik Sprial, 
along with its newest member--and Trent's babe-- Monique arrived on the 
scene and were booing and hissing at The Red Barchetta Hotel. 

"Hey, don't be a sour ball," said Jane. "For a high rise building, it's 
a work of art by my standards." 

"Why do you think we're sour balls?" said Trent. "That hotel just got 
rid of another piece of the old neighborhood." 

"I liked it better when The Kaboom Fireworks Factory," said Jesse, "used 
to be there." 

"That sucks," said Monique. "I loved the explosions from that place each 
time someone there made a goof. WHOOMP-WHOOMP!!" 

"Those firecrakers ruled," said Nick. 

"So did their Roman candles," said Max. 

But while the Mystik Sprial bandmates were bemoaning progress, Daria was 
in a reverie.....for ever since she and Sandi kissed, she hadn't, from 
time to time, been able to get the memory out of her mind. The feel of 
kissing another girl, the feel of a girl's mouth, the silk, sheer creamy 
feel of Sandi's mouth, her long jasmine scented brunette hair.......and 
the fact they had pulled close, their bodies almost touching, and the 
fact that the auburn could feel the slightest touch of her nipples, even 
through her coat and blouse, brush along the brunette's breasts. So it 
was no wonder that Daria felt hot and flushed----until she heard Tom 
call out: 

"Daria? Hey, Daria!!" 

Shaking herself out of her trance, the auburn said, "Huh? What 
happened?" 

"What happened?" said Tom. "You looked like a zombie." 

"I did?" 

"What you do," said Jane, "step into The Twilight Zone?" 

Before Daria could reply, a woman in a skirt and blazer stepped foward-- 
and it turned out to be her favorite aunt, Aunt Amy Barksdale. "Daria!!" 
she said jovially. "How's my favorite niece?" 

"Couldn't be better," replied the auburn somberly. 

"Oh, what's wrong? Did your mother try to bribe you again?" 

"No, let's just say I had a bad day. So what brings you here?" 

"Believe it or not," said Amy, "I got a job--desk clerk and part time 
concierge Amy Barksdale--" here, she gestured at the hotel--" of The Red 
Barchetta Hotel, at your service." 

"You work at that hotel?" said Jane. "How come?" 

"For one thing, it could be just the place to date a fellow--and there's 
plenty of them there at the hotel......who knows?" Then turning to Tom, 
she said, "So that is the boyfriend you've been talking of to me right?" 

"Yup," said Tom. "Name's Tom Sloane." He shook Amy's hand. 

"Amy Barksdale, Daria's aunt and part time confidante." 

For Daria, it was good fortune that her aunt and her boyfriend got along 
well. When Amy started to depart, she said to her auburn niece, "Listen, 
I got to get back to work and snare a hopeful fellow, but if you and/or 
your family need anything here at the hotel or whatnot, feel free to 
call me." 

"Uh......sure," said Daria. "Thanks again." 

As luck would have it, Daria reached home ahead of Quinn, Jake and 
Helen. Once there, Daria showered, dried and dressed before her sister 
and her folks came home, one by one. 

For the rest of the day and the night, everything went well, Jake 
ranting over his pop and military school, Helen talking over a day in 
the life with a case she worked with Eric and Quinn doing her fashion 
and dating ramblings. But for Daria Morgendorffer, that day was a 
strange one at that when it came to the feelings she had--for something 
else..... And the auburn hated it, didn't like it and most of all, 
DIDN'T want it at all. And yet........ 

Why did she have those feelings? And just because of one kiss? Just one 
bet? Why didn't Sandi call off the bet? For that matter, why didn't she 
kiss Quinn? For the moment, the auburn was puzzled over why that 
happened. 

And then late at night, the nightmares came. 



Ye gads!! Daria and Sandi, the most unlikely two, kissed each other!! 
What could result from that?!? True, Daria and Sandi would NEVER do 
that, but even so, what if there WERE hidden feelings stored within 
themselves for years, until a quirk of fate triggered them?. And what 
far worse awaited them? The fact that Daria and Sandi were of different 
worlds....could it be? 

Though they were the most unlikely sort that would NEVER, in any shape 
or form, be in some kind of love. Yet behind the cynical and stuck up 
masks they respectively wore, they were women none the less. And what 
if, be it an alternitive universe or the universe as we know it, 
something like that was discovered? A hidden talent or passion? Who 
knows 

Next: 2: On The Second Day (Yes I Am) 

--Ronin.

Onwards to Part 2


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