Reflections
Another non-legal bit: This is a sequel to my story Respite, and
it will probably not make much sense unless you have read that. This
story is set after Metroid Fusion, and assuming they make more games
set after that then it probably diverges from that point too. It is
also shoujo-ai flavoured.
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Waiting was always the worst part. No matter what had to be done,
there was always the long, tedious limbo that filled the gaps in
between. Space travel made such boredom commonplace. Contract work
had the perpetual hunt for jobs and the space between commissions
always managed to feel like an eternity of wasted time, no matter how
needed to retain a person's sanity it was. At times like this even
her thoughts seemed unproductive.
***
'Been and gone. Again. The possibilities hadn't panned out, but I
didn't expect they would really. Dealing with the kind of corporate
politics that are probably involved here doesn't make information
easy to find. It would have been so much easier if it was just a
small group of criminals, but then how would they get their hands on
a metroid? It doesn't make any sense, but I suppose it never did. At
least we know for sure it isn't a regular criminal set up behind it.
'There's a lot to be said for the underground grapevines. Where
to steer clear of, who to look for, things to find. They have some
great not-so-legal markets. It's not like I've ever cared how I get
what I do as long as I can. It makes making a living easier, and if
someone has a problem with that then they can shove off. It's not
like what I do is easy or anything. I'd like to see the geeks and
posers try it, and I'll laugh when they get their heads blown off.
That's why the underground is such a last resort. Everyone thinks
they've got what it takes, but they're all talk and no balls. And of
course, a vine is only as good as its grapes. It's useless when we
need something that's been properly concealed.
'I wonder if anyone would think me capable of thinking that.
Cold, closed off, law abiding me. ... Why should I care what they
think? It's impossible not to though. Hearing the whispers and
rumours begins to grind you down after a while. And of course lashing
out only makes it worse. People forget how strong I can be. They
should learn to keep their mouths shut, but putting a guy on his back
makes them whisper all the louder.
'I don't hide away. This is just the way I am. I didn't create
this ice queen image for myself; everyone else did that for me. Not
putting up with idiots makes me anti-social? Bullshit. I've had
friends. I have friends. And they're not the morons that everyone
thinks I should put up with. I haven't given up my life for alcohol,
money or wasting time the way everyone else seems to find so
satisfying. If I have given it up, then it's been for everyone else's
good. I'm not some selfless heroine, I've always had my own agenda,
but I *have* made what I do worthwhile. I'm not a heartless bitch
either. If I was I'd never have done so much of what I have. There
was an easy road. I just didn't take it.
'No, I'm not complaining. Or making excuses. It just seems like
it's not been worth it sometimes, especially when things don't work
out in the end. That one small alien appearing suddenly pitched my
life on its side. Everything became too complicated. I couldn't do
much to find out what the hell happened, it's not my area, but still,
it's a disappointment. I could see it in her face too.
'I wonder if Sam ever feels like this?'
***
"Ms. Aran, I can see what you're saying but what has happened
here is unprecedented." The middle aged tech looked at both her and
Patricia with hesitant eyes. He didn't want to get on their bad sides
but there was only so much he and his team could do. "We're not even
sure the plating will take, and we're at a loss as to how to adapt it
to this morph ball capability you have."
Samus frowned at him. "Which is why I brought Trish. She said
it's possible."
"Well sure it's *possible*," he said, a little fear beginning to
creep into his voice, "but the chances of actually getting it to work
are remote."
His eyes slid over to Patricia. "I don't doubt Miss Lands'
abilities, it's the practicality of the whole thing. We need time.
Now the Federation-"
"I'm paying you for this. If I wanted them I wouldn't be here,
understand?"
Patricia was startled by the suddenness of Samus' response. Had
it really been that bad? Evidently the tech believed it had, and he
nodded in compliance.
"Look, okay, we'll try." He gave the pair of them a hesitant
smile. "You're a great customer and we appreciate the chance to study
this kind of thing; just be aware there's only so much we can do."
Patricia could tell that it wasn't what Samus wanted to hear, but
it was enough and the bounty hunter nodded, her face becoming neutral
once again and even giving him a minor smile in return. "Thank you
Dr. Sein. You'll have a few weeks, so make it work as best you can."
"We will," he assured her, before leaving them to assemble his
team. Patricia knew this was a real chance for them, both to study
the suit and the effects the X had had upon what had been left of it.
"Don't you need to go?" Samus asked her.
Patricia shook her head, looking over to her friend in the
hospital bed. It had been a real surprise to see her return in the
strange new suit, even after having been told of its appearance over
inter-stellar radio, and finding out they had had to surgically
remove it had been an outright shock. "They'll call once they've
studied it and figured out how to attack it. I figured you could use
the company after going under the knife. How does it feel?"
"My hand's still numb," the hunter replied, losing the
professional hardness in her voice and face. She felt drained. "And
there's something trying to eat my spine from the inside out, so
generally pretty crap."
Samus was never one to sugar coat the facts. She gave a shrug,
looking down at her limp right arm and the new run of metal that
adorned it. "At least they said the sockets'll work fine. Better than
the scars. The gun's easier to use, but I'm not sure it's worth
having it burrowing into my limb for the privilege."
The deadpan tone of voice belied an uneasiness in her friend,
Patricia could tell. The suit was such a major part of Samus' life;
something like this must have shaken her a lot. "Sam, is it worth
replacing the outer armour? It must be easier to move in now, and
you've recovered all the suit's functionality."
Samus shook her head. "It's not good enough if I can't rely on it
for protection. The armour strength isn't nearly what it was, and the
only reason I could deal with the situation was being able to absorb
the X. They're gone, so I need my old protection back."
"You do realise it won't be as strong as before." Patricia knew
she did, but it had to be said again all the same. "Especially not if
we can't somehow get it to bond to the new layout. The X fused the
cybernetic circuitry and ended up compacting the whole thing into the
undersuit with the bio-channels it made. Tapping into that is going
to be hard."
"I know it won't have the same level of resistance, but with the
fusion suit as an underlay it'll be better than it was. And you'll
have more room for materials. Extra backup energy cells, missile and
bomb charges, the lot. Recycling power is good until it gets spent on
absorbing damage, and at the moment it takes too little to use that
up. As for getting it to bond: you haven't let me down yet. Although
that phazon cannon is slow in coming!"
Patricia took the jibe and rolled her eyes. "Right. No pressure
then. Maybe I shouldn't have bothered with software and studied bio-
tech instead."
"Haven't the Federation sent you the data they had?" Saying it
evidently left a bad taste in her mouth, but she would have been up
in arms if they hadn't. After all they had put her through they had
better have given Trish what she needed.
Patricia nodded, but didn't feel as happy about it as she could
have. "Yeah, but I got the feeling they wouldn't have even talked to
me about it if I hadn't sent them what I had when you were infected.
In any case it's a lot of supposition and theory, but they were
pretty much guessing when they were treating you. It'll help, but I
don't know how much."
Samus huffed in annoyance at the whole thing. "After what they
tried to pull with the SA-X I wouldn't be surprised if they've hidden
most of what they found out. Assholes."
Patricia shared the sentiment, but for the opposite reason. "I
hope they have. If all they had was what they've sent me I wouldn't
want you within three light years of them if you only got a cold!"
She was glad when Samus chuckled at that. They needed to get off
the dead topic or Sam would just fester over whatever it was that the
Federation had done to her. "Anyway, I'll do my best. Just remember
that we don't have whatever alloy it was that the Chozo used. If, or
maybe when you do find them then they'll be able to do much more for
you than we can, even if we get it to work."
Sam gave her the first genuine smile she had since returning
after the debacle on BSL. "Actually, I might have another lead on
them. When you're done I'll try and follow it up. Just to know there
are some still alive somewhere. I don't want the family I had to have
been the last of them."
***
'There's so much to her that people never see. Or maybe they
don't want to. I don't think she hides it all, they just make up
their own minds and that's all they want. The Chozo for instance.
There's this glow in her eyes whenever she talks about them, a
vibrancy to her that no one believes she's even capable of. I don't
know how she does it. How can she remember them with such happiness
when they aren't there any more? Sometimes it's a wistful glow,
sometimes a hopeful one, but she's never shed a tear over losing
them. Maybe it's like an Irish wake type thing. She concentrates on
their life, not their deaths, and so she always has good memories.
'But then, I suppose the Chozo never really die. Even when they
need help finding rest, Sam says you can still feel them afterwards.
A sort of spiritual tingle in the air. Maybe that's just the blood
they gave her or maybe it's real, I don't know - I'm a scientist -
but she feels it. I would have thought visiting their dead cities of
stone and water would leave her mourning but she never seems to come
close to that, because she can feel them. I don't know, maybe she
does grieve and just doesn't tell me about that, but she makes them a
source of strength rather than an emotional weakness.
'And how many other people have seen even a glimpse of that? What
small fame she has has not been kind to her. I'm amazingly lucky I've
got to know her as she is rather than as what people want her to be.
They want an icon. They know her as a warrior: as a suit. How many
people recognise her face? How many even care that she has one? She's
a goddess of the hunt, but not because she takes life. That would
just make her a murderer. In fact the whole goddess image makes me
worry. A huntress yes: a leader and provider who will kill expertly
for us. But a goddess? All powerful Samus Aran to whom we can lay all
our problems? She's only human. Well, she's more than human, but
she's her own person. Why do the cult icon fans have to go so far
when they know so little?
'But then, am I any better? I've never seen this cold hard killer
that everyone else sees in that visor of hers. How can I say I know
her when the image that has grown up around her bears so little
resemblance to the person I call a friend? Finally seeing her fight,
and against a metroid at that, I still don't understand. She was
professional, skilled and out of her element without her suit, but I
would have half expected her to make a callous quip before finishing
the creature if I had listened to some of the others there.
'It's all built on rumours and reports, not on her herself. And
I've never had to face the huntress, or if I have I wasn't paying
much attention at the time. I must have seemed like I was asking to
be put in hospital, ignoring Samus Aran in favour of her power suit.
She didn't have her fame then though. That came with the metroids, or
rather the information that ended up coming out about them, and Sam's
ability to fight them. She told me what she was contracted to do,
however justified or difficult the task, could almost have amounted
to genocide. Is that fashionable? I wonder if her reputation scares
people away from her as much as her bare way of speaking puts them
off. When we do wander the station she doesn't get a celebrity
welcome. They clear the road and stare in morbid fascination, but how
many of them would keep that up if she looked their way?
'She doesn't care, but what is the good of fame, even on the
small scale she has, if it isn't something you can enjoy? It just
gets her more dangerous jobs. It's ironic in the most unkind way, and
even if that doesn't matter to her, it does to me. Dangerous lives
are short, no matter how talented or well equipped the individual.
Why should that be the way it turns out for her, just because she's a
'huntress'?
'I just realised. I don't know how old she is.'
***
Samus was just sitting there on the floor, an almost calm look on
her face. Patricia had forbidden her from sitting on the bed in her
suit because she would likely have wrecked the mattress, but she
didn't mind in the least. Her helmet lay on the floor beside her as
she finished sharing her latest experiences on Zebes. Of course, they
were slightly edited, and Patricia could tell that, but it would be a
long time before she realised just what it was that Samus had been
editing out, and just why the calm didn't quite reach her eyes.
Losing a child, of any species, tended to leave that kind of hole.
The Federation had also forbidden her to reveal many other
details she was now telling her friend, but if they were going to
penalise her for the planet's destruction then they could stuff it.
She'd done them a major service, and they would inevitably come back
for her help again later.
Patricia listened in rapt amazement. She didn't know how to deal
with her recent realisation about herself, but even though she knew
little of combat and Samus' trade she was on the edge of her seat as
she heard of her friend's escape.
"Wow," she exclaimed as Samus finished. "I guess it's kind of an
end of an era then. No more Zebes, no more Ridley, no more Mother
Brain. No more metroids even."
That was the way it always seemed to be on Samus' big endeavours.
So much of what was happening and what had happened was due to other
parties. In the end it all boiled down to the metroids. In Samus'
mind the metroids were simply another potential threat, but they
always managed to steal the thunder in the end. Some way or another.
It didn't say much for the Pirates, that was for sure.
Samus nodded. "Yeah. I'm sure the Pirates have operations
elsewhere, but after losing everything and everyone on Zebes they
won't amount to much for a very long time. I made sure Kraid and
Ridley were gone for good, Mother Brain turned to dust right in front
of me, and then the planet went up. It's about time I was able to say
good riddance to them for good."
Patricia could almost see the credits go up. Now there was some
proper closure and Sam could get on without the lot of them hanging
over her. "So," she asked, trying not to be obvious, "are you going
to stay for a bit? We can go out and celebrate."
Samus cracked a grin. "Why not. Just as long as I can get out of
the suit first."
Patricia wasn't used to Sam agreeing to something like that
without a little prodding first, even if it would just be the two of
them sharing a bottle of wine in a decent bar. It also meant there
wasn't much else to say right then. The pleasant atmosphere of
satisfaction and company in which they could relax meant that small
talk would have been a bad idea. The concept of companionable silence
was one they played well, and as pleasant as it was just to make
their inane chat at times right now all Patricia would have got would
have been one word answers.
Patricia didn't know how long they sat, and Samus didn't care.
She hated it when people tried to make conversation when it wasn't
needed and they just talked at her. Especially when it was work. In
fact it had taken her a little while to get used to Patricia's
banter, but they had somehow found a point of mutual ground they
shared. The fact that Patricia was highly intelligent also helped!
She was broken out of her reverie by Patricia's question though.
"So, what are the Federation going to do now that they don't have
a metroid to study? I bet they were really pissed over losing their
un-cloneable specimen."
Samus looked at her in surprise. "What? How did you know about
that?"
Patricia just gave her a smile and walked over to lie behind her
on the bed. "It was leaked, and the scientific community doesn't let
information like that go easily."
"It figures." She could tell Samus couldn't really care less
though. "The Space Pirates tried to clone them, and all they got were
weak imitations. The Feds were livid about letting Ridley make off
with it, but at least the researchers said they got a lot of good
stuff before Ceres went down. Heh, I'm starting to get a reputation
for mass destruction too."
"So what?" Patricia chuckled. "It'll keep the bounties in line."
"Or make them run faster," Samus replied. "Actually, some
bounties that run would be welcome. I could do with some easy money
after scouring Zebes for Pirates."
Samus stood up, working out the mild ache that sitting on the
floor like that had put into her leg. "Anyway, let's go for that
drink. I'll get out of this thing. See you in a bit."
Patricia couldn't help but stare as she left. 'Jeez, pull
yourself together girl,' she told herself, then she set about finding
something to wear. A battered T-shirt and grease stained slacks
weren't ideal for going out. She stripped out of them and pulled on a
blouse and the only skirt she owned, a medium length deep green one.
Looking in the mirror she could see her hair was hardly flattering as
short as it was, but that was who she was. At least she had decent
legs or else she'd have had to dig out her old suit trousers, and
they were very severe, saved only for big contract deals. Not that
she needed to convince people to hire her these days.
She had to wonder what Sam would be wearing. She had so rarely
seen her out of the suit, and when she had it had just been small
leathers or very casual outfits. How Sam managed to spend so much
time in that armour was beyond her, but apparently it had its
benefits, and it meant that she was always ready for action.
The knock at the door made her jump, but she knew who it was.
Strangely she gave herself a last look over before getting it. She
never bothered with makeup or anything, but she could at least be
reasonably presentable with Sam. That was the excuse she gave herself
anyway.
Opening the door she almost had to do a double take. Samus had
her hair down and was wearing a tight pair of black trousers, with a
short vest and fairly nice open shirt worn over that. Patricia, even
in as simple an outfit as she was, felt a little dressed up. Still,
being so used to seeing the armour she would probably felt that
unless Samus was wearing a dress suit, and the hunter didn't own one
of those!
"You look good," she said, trying to rid herself of her unneeded
hesitance. "I'd forgotten what good shape you're in. That suit does
nothing for you."
"Thanks," Samus replied dryly. "You clean up pretty well yourself
little girl." If Trish could get away with digs at her armour then
her baby face was fair game. She was a little surprised when Patricia
blushed a bit and averted her eyes, mumbling that she probably
deserved that. Still looking so young was one of the few things she
managed to get self conscious about.
"Whatever, come on Sam, let's go already before someone spots you
and wants an interview."
Samus laughed at that, saying that nobody would recognise her out
of the suit, and she was right. No one noticed them as anything more
than two fairly attractive women going wherever they were going. Even
seeing Patricia out and sitting at the bar, as reputable as she was
to some on the station, was hardly a cause for comment.
Finally their drinks arrived and Samus raised her glass in a
toast. "To the end of Mother Brain and her cronies."
"To now having a safer galaxy to live in."
"To having scared anyone with a bounty on them shitless."
"And to seeing the last of the metroids."
Samus slowly gave a weak smile. "Yeah, them too."
***
'She didn't believe that though. Maybe she was trying to convince
herself that it was true, or maybe she started feeling conflicted
about them earlier than I realised, but she knew they weren't gone.
There's a lot inside her that she wants to keep locked away. I might
even go as far as to say that's why she seems so shut off from
everyone. Her feelings for the Chozo, the Pirates, the metroids, and
the federation too. She hardly ever shares her opinions or emotions,
like she doesn't want anyone but herself to get involved with the way
they all end up looking when she sees them.
'I learnt that early on. Never give her advice on what she should
do about the things that matter to her. She dislikes taking orders in
her work, it's no wonder she's going to blow up at anyone who tries
to do the same with her personal life. She's her own person, and woe
betide anyone who tries to change that. Even me. I've never had to
feel her knuckles, but she doesn't need to use them to hurt you. At
least I deserved it, but I've not invaded her life like that again,
and standing up to her over the phazon cannon was another experience
I could well have done without. Especially since I was the one who
was wrong again.
'But I have to wonder; can she do it alone? She's smart. She
might not win awards for her IQ, but she has more wisdom in her
blonde head than most. Even so, I've got no proof but I think it
preys on her mind, not being able to reconcile everything in her life
the way it was supposed to fit together. In fact, I think the only
real constant in her life now is her vendetta against the Space
Pirates. Her family and the Chozo are gone, her suit has evolved far
beyond what it was designed to be, her job changes with each bounty
and even the stable foundation she thought she had found with the
Federation seems to have slipped from beneath her. And of course
there's the metroids.
'Especially the metroids. She confuses me so much over them. She
doesn't realise how much of her life they've taken over. The Pirates,
they're her main goal, she's convinced that the metroids are just the
tools that got used - a threat - but one like so many others she's
faced. And yet the Prime metroid has rooted itself into the deepest
recesses of her mind, and it's taken its entire species with it.
Every metroid of whatever evolutionary stage since she faced the
Prime has been a worry, one that she was sure she could overcome, but
the memory of them festers in her like a disease. She speaks about
them so often, and doesn't even realise it.
'Hyper evolutionary species are so bizarre. How do they go from
one form to the other in the way they do? The Federation must know,
because they managed to force them through it, but all we can do is
guess. The sheer variety of forms allows them to adapt to almost any
ecosystem, and then multiply by egg or asexual division. I still
think the 'larval' stages are the 'real' ones. All their other
potential forms are just to help the species spread, but once
established they don't need to be anything more that what they hatch
as. It is such a simple and devastatingly effective being before it
evolves, then it leaves itself open somehow in favour of greater
adaptability. Sam thinks I'm crazy for believing that, and I know she
is the authority outside the Federation research teams, but that's
how I think. Of course, I don't know how the Prime would fit in
there, other than as the brain behind the reproductive mass of the
Queen, but that in itself is enough for it to make sense.
'And then there was the newborn, and Sam doesn't know what to
think any more. She hid that from me for so long, and now she feels
as guilty about the metroids as she is afraid of what they can be.
She even thinks that perhaps they see her as being one of them now.
She doesn't know if she is really part metroid thanks to the vaccine,
or whether she just has their DNA so that it could save her life. She
felt sorry for it when it arrived on the station? I have no idea how
to begin to understand that. She fights them, loathes those who abuse
them, and has had them save her life. Does she think that she owes
them something?
'How much did she really let herself care for the newborn that
believed she was its mother? Why are they even able to imprint? Queen
metroids caring for their young? Somehow that idea scares me, but I
don't know why.'
***
"But what do you need me for Reg?" Patricia asked as the old lab
worker almost dragged her down the corridor. "I don't do bio
technology."
"This isn't bio-tech Patricia," Reg replied, forcing his aged
muscles to stop complaining, "so it's not a regular malfunction.
We're talking high grade pseudo-symbiotic cyber-tech way beyond what
we can create right now. She even said something about the Chozo. We
need every head we can get on this and you may not get a better
chance to look at this kind of thing in your life, so for goodness
sakes come on!"
Patricia finally started to keep pace. The very mention of the
Chozo's old technology was enough to make any tech worth their salt
drool at the chance to even take a look, let alone work on some. Why
those avian beings gave it up in favour of their naturalist
lifestyles floored human techs, Patricia included. Humans would take
decades to even come close to that level of sophistication. It was
times like this that made Patricia glad that she had involved herself
with so much of the station's technical personnel, despite having to
work under them for such little pay for so long.
"Chozo? I'm there old man." Reg cracked a smile as she began to
lose herself in her thoughts. "But what's the rush? We've got this
suit that could get you a Federation Science Award and you're not
going to take your time over it? This is worth postponing your
retirement for!"
"That's not the problem," said Reg between breaths. "She's still
in the damn thing!"
They raced along the corridors of Cassidi station until they
finally hit the Technical Research Centre and Reg led her to the
medical wing, one place Patricia was glad she had never had to be
before. People that needed to be brought there didn't make it out
half the time. Patricia hoped that wasn't the case here; this was the
chance to meet the only human ever to get their hands on Chozo
technology!
It was easy to find the operating theatre they were heading to.
The screams and expletives resounded around the complex like the last
defiant words of a military captive having the life literally
tortured out of her. Bursting through the doors and seeing for
herself, that didn't look too far from the truth.
A red helmet lay discarded at the side as five techs continued in
their futile efforts to cut, pry or pull the suit in question off its
occupant, whose strong, pained voice shot out again.
"What the fuck are you people doing!? Get me out of this thing
already!!"
Patricia's eyes widened when she managed to glimpse one of the
techs trying to use a laser drill on the shining orange/gold metal.
The surface pulsed faintly as the laser hit, absorbing the energy and
reflecting enough back to cause the man to drop his tool as it sliced
into his fingers.
"Idiot!" Reg shouted at the man despite being so out of breath.
"I told you... not to use... energy based cutters! Get that hand...
taken care of!"
The old tech quickly led Patricia over to the woman on the table
as the others resumed their work. "It uses recycling energy
conduction to nullify pretty much anything we do to damage it, and we
can't get enough leverage on any section joints to pry them open."
Then the blond owner let out an incredible scream as both she and
the suit spasmed, her back arching as her body succumbed to another
horrifically strong dose of unneeded heart massage. Without the
helmet to support her any more the techs dashed to keep her from
breaking her neck in her contortions.
"How do you suggest we go about it?" Reg asked as the woman's
spasm slowly fell into a small fit. "We need her out to even begin to
try and repair the life support systems."
Patricia took a deep breath, trying to remain as professional as
her mentor was despite the sight in front of her. "Is this a test or
do you think I can figure out something you haven't?"
"Both."
Patricia watched as the woman's seizures passed, leaving her
panting on the table. "Ask her."
"We have," Reg replied. "All she said was something about letting
it seal her in the back."
Then they heard the pained voice, faint over the sounds of the
struggling technicians. "Back... backplate."
The pair rushed over to her head and the others stopped to
listen.
"I let it... seal itself... on the backplate." She gave a heaving
cough. "And it lets me out when I want."
Reg looked over to Patricia, "But it thinks she's having heart
and nervous system failure, so it's not going to let her out to die."
"It's just a fucking machine!" The blonde woman growled up, her
eyes blazing at their apparent incompetence.
"Not while you're wearing it it's not," Reg replied calmly, and
as if to agree the suit sent another dose of electrical charge
through its captive.
"Hold her up, hold her up!" someone shouted as the woman arched
again, screaming from the bottom of her lungs as the paralysing pain
shot its way through her body.
Just then inspiration hit and Patricia spoke. "How long can she
hold out?"
"I would have said this was too long," said one of the techs, "so
not much longer."
As the woman's fit finished Patricia leant down and spoke to her.
"Hey, what's your name?"
"What does it matter?" Samus retorted weakly at being talked down
to by a teenager.
"It matters if I'm going to help you get out of this thing."
Patricia replied. "What's your name?"
"Samus," the woman said slowly, getting her breath. "Samus Aran."
"Okay Samus, now I want you to will yourself out of the suit.
That's how you usually do it right?"
"You think I haven't tried that?!" Samus spat back.
"But this time we're going to try and fool your suit into
thinking it's done its job. Just keep willing yourself out whatever
happens, okay."
Samus obviously didn't like being told that, but she nodded all
the same. Her pride wasn't worth her life. "Right."
Patricia then leaned over to Reg. "When she next goes we get
underneath and shock anything that might be the entry seams or
casings. With her trying to get out and the energy conduction
defences we might be able to finish making whatever connections are
being blocked by the medical system, and so have that believe it's
done its job. Assuming it uses electrical relays. Plus if it can
short then it should let her out automatically right? So we win
either way."
"That's a long shot Patricia," Reg said in an equally low voice,
"but I've got nothing better."
Reg got the conductors, and all they could do was wait. Then,
after an agonising minute Samus let rip with anther scream and the
techs supported her as her body arched. Patricia and Reg were under
in an instant, hurriedly probing at every seam and significant area
they could find until the rear shell fell open, the large shoulder
guards sliding forwards to let the other techs pull her free. Reg and
Patricia just managed to pull back before the suit collapsed onto the
table, but Samus gave a last cry of pain as she was pulled out and
fell limp in their arms.
Reg immediately took control. "Set up a stable containment area
and anyone who hasn't suited up for extreme risk do so *now*. I won't
have anyone starting work until we've got it powered down. Steveson,
call the medics. Patricia, take care of her until they arrive, then
suit up."
Patricia did as she was told. She'd get to work on the suit
eventually. She leant down next to Samus' mouth, but she couldn't
feel anything on her skin. Checking her neck gave better results
though. "I've got a pulse."
She took a deep breath and pinched the woman's nose before
beginning to breathe for her. Samus however didn't respond for a long
time, and Patricia was wishing the medical team would hurry up when
Samus finally gave a cough and lurched upwards, Patricia still on
her. The young tech was thrown to the floor but looked up smiling as
Samus blinked and began to look about.
"Jeez, it took you long enough. I thought I'd have to kiss you
'till the medics arrived. Are you okay?"
Samus stared at her for a moment. "Yeah."
"That suit of yours is amazing, even if it is on the fritz. I'd
love to have been able to get something from the Chozo like that."
Samus stared again, rather non-plussed, and was about to reply
when the medics arrived. Patricia glanced over then got to her feet.
"Anyway, you're all theirs now."
"Hey," Samus said as Patricia turned her back, "I need it fixed
soon, so don't think you're going to start researching what doesn't
belong to you. You aren't ready for what the Chozo have."
"You mean had. They're extinct!"
"No," she shook her head seriously, "they're not."
"Anyway," Patricia added, ignoring Samus' defiance of the facts,
"what's the rush? They said you're a bounty hunter so you make your
own hours, right?"
Samus nodded. "I need to get after Space Pirates. And something
they've got called a metroid." Then she realised just how much she
was saying. "Hey, who are you to ask anyway?"
"Oh, Patricia Lands," she gave a wave as she left to put on her
gear. "Nice kissing you Samus!"
Samus frowned and removed her leather vest as the medics began to
look her electrical burns over. That was easier than trying to move
to a less open ward just now. And anyway, she wanted to keep an eye
on her suit.
***
'That's one thing I never expected with Sam. She can be an
insanely private person, but she isn't shy about herself physically.
I wish I'd paid her more attention back then, because that one
glimpse I was given haunts both my dreams and nightmares. That image
means more than I thought it would when I realised what I felt. I
think it's the only way she would ever be vulnerable to anything.
'Getting crushed by an escaping zip craft actually depleted her
entire protective energy reserve, and so her suit malfunctioned.
Thank god she could get here, even if she had to recharge to do it.
It's happened since, but that first time it worried her. It made her
think a little more about what she puts herself through, and for that
I'm glad.
'I'm in love with her.
'I wonder if anyone else can tell. I've never been able to say
anything, however much I want to. Something always stops me. How can
you tell someone you love them when they've just survived an alien
super organism and been chewed out for destroying it and the planet
it lived on, or when you've just been attacked by a metroid when you
least expected it. I tried when she came back from the destruction of
Zebes, but what if..? 'What if' a lot of things really. The idea was
so new then. I was just scared. I suppose, whatever excuses I make,
I've been afraid ever since.
'I don't even know if any of what I dream of is even remotely
possible. I could have spent the last year setting myself up for
failure. I've never thought about the fact that I'm attracted to a
woman. It doesn't matter in this day and age the way that it used to.
The same with race, or colour, or accent, or anything else. Space
eliminated that a long time ago, and there are other species if we
want to worry about such things. Only now I know why it was such an
issue back then. She might not be interested simply because of what I
am. She might be disgusted. Okay, so that one isn't so likely, I
really need to give those history books back to the data archive, but
I've never liked taking risks when I have this much to lose.
'And then there's Adam. We never talk about relationships. Well,
except that once, when I admitted I liked the idea of marriage. I
should have said it then, the chance was staring me right in the
face. Stupid.
'But yeah, Adam. Sam never really talks about specific people
except for him. I haven't a clue who he is, but she was upset over
him once. I didn't know her that well then, we were still just
meeting thanks to the suit as opposed to seeing each other for a
friend to talk to as well, but underneath the wall she had up I think
she was upset, or else she wouldn't have mentioned him at all. And
recently she's started mentioning him again. She likes him, even
though I got the impression he's with the Federation, but for all I
know he could be her husband. No, I doubt that, but I get so jealous
of that name. I can only pray they aren't involved.
'What am I supposed to do in the end? Say, "Oh, by the way Sam,
are you a lesbian? Because I've had the hots for you for over a year
now and I really want to marry you!"
'Whatever happens I won't be saying it like that! She's right
though, it's better to find out for sure and then deal with it than
either living dreaming of a lie or living without something I could
have. It's useless to promise myself I'll say it next time, I've
tried and failed for too long already, but it *will* happen, because
the longer I wait the more it hurts to let it slip away each time. I
just have to hope there won't be any other crises to get in my way.'
***
Patricia couldn't help but find herself a little worried now. She
and this bounty hunter Samus Aran had been able to talk openly with
each other before the extermination mission to SR-388, but now it
seemed that Samus was closing back in on herself again. She hadn't
taken a job since then, and now, in her third visit since wiping them
out she seemed even more reluctant to look for one, and she said as
much.
"Unless they come looking for me. I just have to make my
delivery, and then I'm going to stick to the things I want." The
hunter rested her metal clad body against the wall.
Patricia gave her friend a sympathetic look, even though all she
could see was the helmet and visor. Samus hadn't taken them off this
time. "Are you sure it isn't the press? I know it's a pain the
mission got leaked, but..." She stopped herself before she gave the
advice. It wasn't needed, and wouldn't be well received. "It'll die
down, and you don't have to explain yourself."
Samus just 'Mmmmed' in response before lapsing into silence
again. After a moment Patricia turned back to her tools, giving a
mental sigh. Why was Sam doing this? She had hoped that they were
beyond hiding away in themselves when they had something on their
chests. Evidently that wasn't going to happen. There was at least the
fact that Samus was silent in her company rather than being so alone.
After a while however Samus did speak. "Trish, I'm not going to
become a Federation poster child."
"What?"
Samus sounded fed up. "It was a job. They hired me and I did the
work. I don't care if I have a history with them, that's all it was.
I don't like the fact that I'm being made into some kind of hero for
it."
"What are you talking about Sam?" Patricia asked, confused. "What
you did was incredible! Of course they're going to call you a hero.
Even if it isn't big news it's something to be proud of."
"Be proud of what?" Samus asked back. "I wouldn't have taken it
if I didn't think I could do it. I won't be used as a model for the
Federation. I don't belong to them."
Patricia nodded. "I'm sure they know that."
"I want to get the Pirates Trish. They know that too. Do I have
to hunt them down myself after what I've done for the Federation?
I've been paid, but are they going to cut my goals loose and keep my
image because it suits them?" She sat forward, resting her elbows on
her knees. "Hell, they might as well have planned the damned leak. I
may have had to take orders but at least under Adam I was kept in
mind."
"Everyone has bounties on pirates Sam," Patricia said, taking the
initiative on the topic. "I'm sure one of the trading companies here
could point you right if you wanted."
Samus shook her helmeted head. "Not regular cargo jacking pirates
Trish, Space Pirates, the insectoid ones. Or rather their leaders."
Patricia was surprised at that revelation. "You mean the ones
with the metroid? I thought you already finished them."
If she had been closer Patricia would have been able to see
Samus' eyes narrow behind the visor. "No. The insects I couldn't care
less about, they're just in my way now. But I've heard reports of a
dragon out there. Ridley. And if he's still alive there's a chance
the others might be too. Maybe even Mother Brain. I haven't spent my
life hunting them just to let them slip through my fingers now. I'd
have them already, but nobody has good reports, just rumours and
random sightings."
Patricia was no stranger to obsession. She'd given up her
childhood for her love of machines. However, this was something she's
never heard from Samus before, in spite of the times they had spent
talking together. "So... Why go after them? It's more than just the
law, right? You've taken them down once already."
"Simple," came Samus' low, quiet voice. "They kill my people, I
kill theirs. Don't give me that look Trish, I'm going to wipe them
out. My parents died under one of Ridley's attacks, and they've been
the ones to kill over half the Chozo settlements I've ever found.
They die."
"And... then?" Patricia ventured.
"Then nothing," Samus replied. "End of story. I keep doing my
job. It's negotiable."
There wasn't any more that needed saying. Why drag out what was
better left alone? They filled the rest of the evening with small
talk and silence, Samus' veil slowly lifting again as they did. Samus
would talk about it again when she wanted to. For now she was just
feeling raw and wanted to get onto a more pleasant subject. Vengeance
took a lot out of a person.
When Samus finally left Patricia couldn't find it in herself to
just let her go like she had before. She'd never said anything about
her birth parents before, or the obsession that had taken over so
much of her life. "Sam? I'll... see you tomorrow?"
Samus paused, her expression hidden behind the green visor.
"Sure. Night."
***
'And there was more to it then even that. At the time I never
noticed. I was too busy falling for someone I had only recently been
able to call a friend. And Samus Aran of all people. I really know
how to pick them. I knew I liked girls, and Sam is a real beauty
under than suit in a stoic sort of way. It just hadn't crossed my
mind that I'd start wanting more from meeting her than a friendly
word.
'And of course it was then she ended up on Ceres, and back to
taking down the Pirates. She got what she wanted out of it after all.
I wonder why they call them that? Don't those insects have a name?
Wouldn't their superiors give themselves a fear-inspiring title?
Still, what do I know? I'm a technician on a research city-station,
not a criminal psychologist.
'I suppose there is one other thing I worry about with Sam.
Actually it's more about myself. Would I still love her if I saw her
being what she is known for? She can't be wholly indiscriminate. I
don't believe she's capable of it. Despite her loss she seems to have
had a good childhood; she never talks about it with anything but
affection. She may not be fully human any more, and she may not be as
balanced as some, but she's still capable of feeling. I've seen it. I
don't want to have to see her put that aside to do her job, and I
never want to see the carnage I know she's wrought to those she hates
with such passion. I could say I would love her whatever, but you can
never know that until you have to put it to the test. And when I do
what I know I want to, then I will have to face it eventually. I've
already seen her slay a baby metroid.
'That must have been hard to do. At least if she had been able to
use her suit it would have been finished without the need to think
about it. She put off going to Ceres for one simple reason. She could
say it was a simple rest period, or perhaps she found little things
to do, but in the end it was the newborn. Just as the creature
imprinted on her, she allowed herself to become attached to it. She's
admitted as much to me herself, thought never that simply. Did the
idea of motherhood appeal to her? I know it does to me. It's not like
it would be a problem after all...
'Shut up Patricia. Just stop thinking. What does it matter? Sam
gave up her child in the end because she was sure it was the right
thing to do. Then she lost it. Then it died for her. Then its legacy
saved her life, and after all that she had to be reminded of it by
slaying one of its kin in a way that hurt the both of them far more
than it needed to. Jeez, I'm thinking like I actually care for the
metroids. Maybe Sam's confusion is rubbing off on me.
'But then, she did care for the little parasite. That's the
turning point. She can be deadly, even brutally so when she needs to
be, but she couldn't kill the newborn. No matter how cold and hard
she can seem, I wouldn't be able to forget that she has the kindness
that she's shown. And the reverse is true too. She's not just a kind
heart and a pretty face. She's a blooded warrior, and if you forget
that it's going to be your grave next to all those she's already
filled. She's single-handedly reduced the most powerful Space Pirate
forces to what might as well be nothing. It says a lot.
'It's a strength that I would feel safe within no matter what
happened. She stayed for a little while before going Ceres, and each
time we met up I realised that fact more. I just didn't know how far
it had gone until she wasn't there any more, and I was left feeling
lonely. After seeing her again afterwards, and proving to myself it
wasn't my imagination, what I ended up doing was more impulse than
anything else, but I couldn't help it. I needed to do something.'
***
When Samus had gone back to her quarters for the night both their
faces had been slightly tinged with the drink. Neither of them drank
often, so it hadn't taken much, but celebrating the fall of the
Pirates on Zebes had needed to be done. Patricia hadn't gone back to
her apartment though, and the effect of the wine had long since
faded, only to be replaced with something better. She hadn't been
imagining it. She... liked Sam. A lot. Those times she had remembered
her while she had been away, followed by the longing ache, were
things she wanted to live without. Not rid herself of the longing
memories, but make sure she didn't have to rely on them any more. She
didn't want to be left without her.
But, as she wandered through the station's corridors, she didn't
know what to do about it. How do you ask Samus Aran out on a date?
Even thinking that seemed absurd. And her feelings had carried her
beyond that anyway. This wasn't a crush, and it wasn't lust, even
though the thought of... that... made her blush.
She wasn't going anywhere, and didn't even notice where she was
as she walked in her light, thoughtful daze. One foot in front of the
other was all the attention her brain paid to anything except her
confirmed realisation. Looking back on that she sometimes wondered
what people must have thought as she wandered the station in the late
evening. She was sure it had started some odd rumours.
How would she say it? It would seem so sudden to Sam, she was
sure, especially since she felt so serious about it. It was by pure
chance that when she looked up she was standing in the middle of the
commercial district. It was hardly auspicious or meaningful, standing
outside an oriental food parlour, but a few doors down she found
herself looking into the window of the small jewellers.
'That's it,' she thought to herself. The potential difficulties
in the situation didn't cross her mind, and nor did she wonder how
she might say the words that went with it, being such a huge leap
above what she had considered before. She wanted to be with Samus for
as long as they both lived, as friends, companions and... lovers.
That's all that mattered.
The voice of rationality for once didn't want to say anything to
point out how awkward it could be. Samus was not the only thing in
Paricia's universe, but she was the only thing she truly needed.
Plucking up her courage she steeled herself and walked into the
store. With so many travellers running on different times few of the
stores ever closed, but it did mean that Patricia was left to browse
over the rings as the attendant slept in her chair. The security was
high enough that it didn't matter, and being on Cassidi that was
essential.
Patricia also realised she didn't have much money on her, and her
account card was in her room. Going back for it would mean that she
might chicken out though, and it wasn't as though she wanted
something flashy. This wasn't some blushing young girl she was buying
this for. Then, on the end of the row, one of the designs caught her
eye. It was a garish and almost ugly piece, a gold one with an over-
large medallion top, on which was printed the design. A circle shape
with zig-zag fractures through it, and the letter A embossed over the
top. The one next to it had a Z.
Patricia went over and woke the attendant, bringing her back to
the case. "I'd like something like this," she said quietly, pointing
to a simple but expensive gold band, "but I'd like to have that
design carved on the inside." Now she pointed to the medallion rings.
The attendant gave her a funny look, but nodded. "Okay, I think
we can do that, although it will bump the price up a lot and the
engraving will take a few hours."
"That's okay," Patricia replied, "I can wait. I'll have to give
you a deposit and pay later though. I do have a perfect credit
rating."
The attendant smiled. "Assuming that's true then that won't be a
problem Miss. Which letters would you like on them?"
"S please, but I only want the one."
The attendant obviously had to suppress her amusement. "Miss,
this is wedding band," she said. "They come in pairs. I must say I
did wonder about a girl your age marrying already."
Patricia tried not to feel offended, and the light blush she felt
covered it well. "Umm... Actually, that is what I was ah... looking
for. I'm not as young as I look. It's just that, well, I don't know
how..."
The attendant nodded, understanding. She'd come across this
plenty of times before. "You're just not sure if it will go the way
you want? Well, I can sell you one now and the other when you know it
is needed."
"That's fine," Patricia said, smiling and handing over one of her
credit cards for the deposit.
The attendant returned her smile and took it, transferring the
deposit from the money that was on it and checking out her credit
status. "That looks fine Miss Lands," she said as she returned the
card. "Since these are personalised we will do both now and keep the
second safe for you. Which letter would you like on the one we
store?"
"P please," Patricia said. It was simple, and maybe a bit tacky,
but it would at least mean something, and it was on the inside
anyway.
***
'If nothing else, it's a reassurance at times like this. Knowing
I have it stops me questioning myself. I've never actually come to
see her arrive like this before. It's fine once I see her, it's the
waiting I can't stand. It's not like she's the only thing I ever have
on my mind, but when she is there isn't anything left to worry about.
Except telling her that! And now I have an excuse to be here to meet
her, even if it is because I screwed up.
'She hasn't taken any big jobs since BSL, so she never had the
chance to see if the replacement outer armour we gave her was the
success we all hoped it was. It turns out it wasn't. She was calm
about it over the comms channel, but it seems not all the armour took
to the fusion suit properly. She had to use the morph ball function,
and it sliced right through the shoulder guards as it reconfigured
itself. Apparently the main chest plate almost cut her in half as
well before it broke away. Thankfully she came out okay, but
evidently we'll have to try and find out what we did right with the
arms, legs and back that we didn't with the front and shoulders.
'It also means more time to study the suit, lucky us, but more
than that it means more time out of the suit for her, and more time
with her for me. I wonder what she ended up doing this time that
caused her to need the morph ball. She just said she hadn't had much
luck in finding out who might have planted the metroid when she was
here last.
'... I can't stand waiting like this. I should have brought a
manual to read or something. How can everyone just sit here doing
nothing? They're right, I'm a workaholic, but better that than
sitting here bored, anticipating seeing her again. It's nothing to
get so worked up about. I feel like a kid waiting to be told I can
get on with being kid-like.
'I wonder if she'll show me her other scars if I ask. She's seen
mine, so it's only fair, and she has such great skin... Okay, so it's
not all enlightened altruistic love. She's hot too. Still, other than
those left from the fusion suit I don't think she has any, even if
she makes a big deal out of them. Maybe that's *why* she makes a big
deal out of them. It's cool she doesn't have to be attractive to
attract you though. I wouldn't mind if she was stuck in the suit full
time, even though it might complicate certain things. That said, I
look forward to the day I can feel her arms around me, and without
the metal. I just have to bite the bullet.
'Oh, there she is, imposing as ever. She's right though, the suit
looks a bit of a mess, and she's getting plenty of attention for it.
I wonder where the other pieces are. Anyway, time to get her to the
labs, before she gets too annoyed at these gawkers. Welcome back
Sam.'
***
The End
***
Please take the time to leave some feedback and let me know what you
thought. Thanks.
Thanks to Richard King for proof reading.
(c) 2004 Nutzoide
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