Flare ----- Kuga Natsuki hated to stay still for long and preferred to adventure. Never the less, when she was stuck without any grand goal or quest, she was most certainly a creature of habit. Change irritated her. When she got used to something, she expected it to remain a part of her life. So when Shizuru essentially relegated her to hanging out on the second and fourth Saturdays of the week, as opposed to seeing each other practically every day like before the Carnival, she became a bit... well, she herself couldn't even really describe it properly. But she didn't like it, she knew that much. It was usually spending the day out on the bike, making use of Shizuru's new helmet. That evening, however, was something that was a rarity even in their better days. Natsuki was draped over Shizuru's couch wearing shorts and a tank top, her evening wear. Shizuru was across from her on the nearby bed, wearing the kimono she always wore to bed. The television was on, but switched to static after Shizuru got up and put down the controller to the console Natsuki had brought over. "You're just a sore loser," Natsuki said. The round of Tekken had nearly been completed before Shizuru shut it off before the final blow could be dealt. Natsuki dropped her own controller down on the nearby table, giving up. "Well, I brought it if you want to watch. Or would you rather sleep?" "No, put it on. I'm used to going to bed in the morning, not now," Shizuru said. Every once and a while the pair went to each other's place to watch movies and play video games (the latter only Natsuki's request as Shizuru was indeed a sore loser and wasn't as skilled in them as the other girl). They alternated who's turn it was to select films. It was Natsuki's turn. The biker got up and went to her biker suit's jacket that was draped over a chair near the entrance of Shizuru's dorm. She returned with a DVD and inserted it into the old player, hitting play and leaving it to take care of itself. She returned to the couch and stretched back out. The ads and previews all passed before the actual movie came on, and Shizuru recognized it almost immediately. The first lyrics to its opening song confirmed it. "From Russia, with love, I fly to you..." the singer began, and Shizuru turned her gaze toward her friend, who looked back, her eyes darting to the floor once or twice. "What?" Natsuki hated it when she did that staring thing. Shizuru remained silent, and Natsuki's eyes locked on the floor again before returning them to her face. "It's my favorite movie. Stop looking at me like that." "My tongue-tied young pride would not let my love for you show, in case you'd say no..." Shizuru rolled her eyes and chuckled dryly before giving her an almost enigmatic smile. "Ara, you and your Sean Connery fetish." "I don't have a Connery fetish," Natsuki defended. "I have a guns and explosion fetish. Besides, you said you liked these movies, for the Bond girls if nothing else. So stop complaining." "My running around is through. I fly to you, from Russia with love," the singer finally concluded, signaling the end of the opening credits. Shizuru said nothing in response, content with watching the film. And lo, there went Sean Connery, off on his mission for the crown, complete with spy technology and pretty women. "Answer me something," Natsuki said after a while, her eyes never leaving the screen. "Hmm?" "Why do you go by Fujino instead of Dragunova?" She asked. She'd wondered it for a while. She never liked her father's family and had lived with Tanya for as far back as she could remember. Shizuru didn't respond at first, which worried her, but she was only slightly taken aback by the randomness of the question, as offended for Natsuki getting too close. Shizuru gave her a slight shrug. "When my father died, my aunt Kaori challenged for guardianship and won over Tanya because she had more money. She hoped to make me a lady. You can see how well that turned out. After a year she got bored with me and tossed me to Tanya, but neglected to sign me over. I'm still legally a Fujino. That's why. Perhaps I'll change it when I get older." "Oh," Natsuki replied quietly, almost drowned out entirely by a distinct Scottish accent coming from the television. She didn't know what to say after that, so she let the matter drop and continued to watch the film. For however late Shizuru said she went to sleep, she was under the covers and out before the ending credits began to roll. Natsuki shut off the television at around two in the morning, ejected the disc, and put it back in the case. She switched off the table lamp that was still on, giving the sleeping Kyoto woman, who was sleeping with her head near the foot of the bed to see the television better, a look before returning to the couch. She pulled the blanket on the back of said couch down over herself, settling down to go to sleep. Ten minutes passed. A half an hour passed. She tossed and turned. Not because she felt uncomfortable in the same room with the other girl, as she'd gotten over that well enough it seemed, but because... well... her body pillow wasn't there, dammit. On top of that tragedy was the realization that Shizuru's new residence got quite cold during the evening. After another half hour of trying to sleep, Natsuki got up with a sigh. She quietly trudged over to the bed, and, after making sure that Shizuru was indeed unconscious, she peeled back the covers on the other side and slid in. She pulled her body closer to the former kaichou's, too used to how Shizuru used to do that to her whenever they stayed at each other's places. Creature of habit. Shizuru's eyes snapped open and her body tensed as she felt a bare (and very cold) leg come to rest against her own, a warming lump of flesh now attempted to sleep behind her. Oh, lord. Landfills. Roaches. Rats. Natsuki's head came to rest against the back of her shoulder. Chris Farley doing the Chippendale's sketch. Sumo wrestler porn. "Go back to sleep," Natsuki commanded, noticing that Shizuru's body was stiff as a board. Ara, why do you do this to me? Shizuru allowed her body to relax a bit. The cold produced by Natsuki's body was rapidly going away thanks in part to Shizuru's own body heat, which was also steadily rising as her cheeks flushed red. Well, Shizuru supposed, this essentially signaled the end to any and all movie nights in the future, didn't it? She really was making things as difficult as possible. What a cruel girl. "In the morning, do you want to go biking?" Natsuki asked. "We can ride out to Okayama and back, maybe." "Can't." "Oh?" Natsuki questioned, not that she was at all surprised. It was not the second or fourth Saturday of the month. She did not have visiting rights on any other day, to her ever growing annoyance. "I have a date." "Oh." In her fatigue and state of near-sleep, she didn't quite get it for several moments. When she did, her eyes widened ever so slightly. She was dating? "Wait, a date? With who?" "Someone from university I met when I was in Kobe a few weeks ago," Shizuru informed. Then, in an attempt to perhaps calm some anxiety, "She's nice. You'd like her." No, she really wouldn't. She was silent, a thousand thoughts racing through her head. This wasn't right. It wasn't supposed to be like that. Shizuru and Natsuki were all each other had. She saw so little of her as it was, now she had to share that time with someone else? What if Shizuru ended up preferring the other girl's company and replaced her entirely? Then, gah, there was some sort of sister (maybe) reaction about Shizuru, who she had never ever saw date anyone before, having foul and lewd things done to her. It was simply not supposed to be like that. "Maybe some other time, then," Natsuki said after a loaded silence, her jaw then clenching shut in anger. No one was supposed to... get close to her. Wrong. It was just... wrong. She shut her eyes tightly. It wasn't jealousy, it was just concern, right? Concern that Shizuru would leave her behind, or get hurt, or... "Goodnight," Shizuru whispered. Like most of her words as of late, they were cold and distant. Natsuki didn't sleep well. - - - For two more months, Natsuki barely saw her. Just those two scheduled days out of thirty to spend together. A few scattered phone calls filled the void her and there, and Natsuki grew ever more irritated. She was ready to completely give up and let Shizuru drag her ass back when she stopped being so damn standoffish. She found herself in the company of Mai and Nao more often than not, or the rest of them on some other occasions. She blamed that, of course, on the dating. She was at her own apartment when Mai, Nao and Mikoto dropped by without warning to hang out. Television was turned on, the video games were started, and Mai rattled on about whatever it was that happened that day at school, no doubt gossip acquired from Chie. She, however, simply returned to where she had been since she got home from school – the couch, where she resumed thinking about everything under the sun. It didn't take long for them to pick up on it. While Nao and Mikoto busied themselves with video games, Mai sat on her legs, as the biker was hogging the piece of furniture for her own brooding. "Well, you seem absolutely giddy and lively. Staring out the window in class and now staring blankly at the wall. This has been a productive day for you." "I've been busy," Natsuki said. As she did so, Nao got up from the floor and headed to her backpack to check her phone for something. "With what?" Mai pried. "Sitting. I'm not finished yet, so kindly get your ass off of me." The words were said in a tone that indicated a true request but with elements of playful sarcasm. She was still quite plagued with visions of some random stranger putting her hands all over her best friend. But with Mai right there, she was taken a bit off guard as she realized that she really didn't care what she and Yuuchi (or Reito, whatever) did in their spare time. But she was closer to Shizuru, so it made sense, right? Nao gave Mai a very pleading look, and after a moment, the elder redhead rolled her eyes and then gave her the non-verbal clearance. Supported by the great HiME leader, Nao marched over to the back of the couch, kicked it, and knocked Kuga right onto the floor – the biker swearing all the way down. She climbed back onto her feet, pushing the couch back up. "Yuuki, what in the hell is wrong with you?" As Natsuki looked as if she wanted to fight, Nao simply smirked. "Complain all you want, but it got you moving." "Can't you go find other souls to annoy?" Natsuki inquired, heading to the sink to refill her water bottle, downing half of it in one good long chug. Nao waved off the comment and resumed playing the video game with Mikoto, who'd recently become fascinated with youthful delight over the things. "Everything all right?" Mai asked kindly, taking a seat where Natsuki had been before, watching the other two play. Natsuki might have considered telling Mai in private, as she was trustworthy and particularly understanding when it came to these kind of matters. With Mikoto, who was too innocent to mind her tongue, and Nao, however, she didn't feel comfortable discussing such things with them. "Yeah, I'm all right. Just tired." "And we interrupted nap time, did we? As someone else would say, 'kannin na, Natsuki'" Mai said, mocking Kyoto-ben, then trapped Natsuki in a great big bear hug from behind. Natsuki flinched and held her breath. She didn't blush, as it was only Mai, but was never the less mildly upset by the imitation and the embrace. Reminded her of what Shizuru no longer did, and she missed it. She slithered out of the hold and Mai merely chuckled as Natsuki said, "Knock it off, Tokiha. You'll get Tate germs on me." Mai released her, and at that point, Nao started to flip through all of her DVDs. "Wow, your tastes are varied. Guns, guns and more guns. What a way to rot your braincells. Not even one kung-fu movie?" Because those were so much more enlightening. "Only an idiot fights hand-to-hand in modern warfare. Get with the times, Chun-Li." "I don't see why you even praise guns so much. You have the aim of a retarded monkey as it is," Nao countered. "That's enough children," Mai interrupted, waving her hand between them to further indicate she wanted them to desist. Seeing as Natsuki did not look quite up for company at the moment, Mai decided to give her a break. "Come on, we've tortured her enough for one day. Let's go to Linden Baum and get something to eat." Nao and Mikoto grumbled but obeyed, heading out of the door and down the hall. Mai turned to go, Natsuki giving her a warm look of thanks. She really didn't mind their company on any other day, but she really just wanted to be alone. They said their goodbyes and Natsuki shut the door behind them. She put away the console and turned off the power before examining the DVDs Nao had messed with. She had an order about them that demanded maintaining, and if that damn street fighter had messed them up... Dr. No, Goldfinger, Thunderball... wait. Where was...? Oh, dammit, she forgot 'From Russia With Love' at Shizuru's. Well, that wouldn't do. She could run over and get it. She picked up her phone and dialed the number. She didn't pick up, which meant she must have been over at the university or in town. She did have the apartment key. Shizuru had given it to her after moving in. Knowing that she would likely forget all about the movie later, she figured if she didn't retrieve it now, she'd lose it for another couple months. So, she grabbed up her helmet and her keys, and set out. - - - Natsuki pulled into one of the motorcycle spots outside the apartment complex Shizuru resided in. Hopping off, she headed in and up to the proper floor. Maybe she would luck out and finally be able to talk to the woman if she was indeed there. Not likely if she hadn't answered the phone. Unless Shizuru was back to ignoring her entire existence. Her helmet in hand, she fumbled for her keys, selecting the one that led in. She rapped twice on the door, but nothing. So, she inserted the key and turned, opening the door. "Shizur--" ohmygodno. Oh, Shizuru was there. Shizuru was there and she was not alone, too distracted to answer the phone or even to hear her admittedly timid knocking. The Kyoto woman was essentially seated on her couch, her shirt removed and her bra half off, revealing her left breast and a good amount of the right one. A pair of underwear was on the floor, though her skirt remained on. A young woman with brown hair had fastened her teeth onto Shizuru's neck and with one hand, was in the process of removing the bra entirely. The other hand had, conveniently, simply disappeared in that skirt and whatever it was doing was making Shizuru arch her back and rock in ecstasy. The kaichou had her eyes closed and mouth opened until she heard Natsuki's footprints. Shizuru's look of pleasure turned to horror, shame and embarrassment as she slid herself away from her companion and scrambled to get her shirt on. The other woman, more or less clothed, dove in front of Shizuru to prevent Natsuki from seeing her unclothed. As she and Natsuki had never met, the woman assumed the worst. "Who the hell are you?" Natsuki didn't say anything, and pivoted around, running back out the door, her face flushed and her chest tight with a whirlwind of emotions. She didn't even have time to say she was sorry for interrupting. She slammed the door behind her and rapidly descended the stairs two at a time, utterly disturbed and perhaps sickened. She got to her bike and started it again, racing off down the street with no regard for the speed limit in that area. She just had to get away as far as possible. By the time she reached the first stop sign, the grip she had on the handles was nothing less than iron as her breathing became labored, now not only disgust, but also rage. What the hell was Shizuru thinking, letting someone do that to her? She screeched down the street again and stormed back to her own apartment, glad that Mai and her cohorts had gone. When she got back into the safety of her place, she roughly slammed her helmet down into the closet and changed back out of her bike leathers and into normal clothing. After that... it was back, to Nao's disdain somewhere out there, to sitting on the couch and sulking. She flung one arm over her eyes, hoping that would somehow make the mental image of Shizuru being fucked go away. It wasn't fair, Natsuki thought. She and Shizuru had practically dedicated themselves to each other in their mutual loneliness. It was only when in the company of each other that either was supposed to feel content. Natsuki had been against it, fearing dependence, whereas Shizuru had been desperately trying to latch to her like a lifeline of sorts. Despite that opposite behavior, it was just... supposed to be them. Natsuki hadn't worried about her dating, about her finding other friends, or about her having sex on her couch with some slut from Kobe. It was just supposed to be the two of them. - - - Her cellphone rang later that evening. The name read 'Fujino,' which prompted Natsuki to shut the device off all together. She resumed fixing herself dinner (instant ramen and mayo, naturally), and sat down at her table with a pair of chopsticks several minutes later when she had completed her preparations.. Halfway through her dinner, however, she was interrupted by a knock at the door. She simply sat there and stared at it for a few seconds. Shizuru? Maybe she was paranoid. It could have been Mai. She got up and opened it, and lo, there was the Kyoto woman. She held the DVD Natsuki had been after in her hands. Natsuki only glared at her. "I'm sorry," Shizuru said simply after realizing that Natsuki was not going to speak herself. Natsuki shook her head and opened the door a bit wider before turning around and heading into the apartment, giving Shizuru the signal that it was all right (for now) for her to step into the dwelling. "Yeah, well, whatever." Shizuru paused. She had expected her to become flustered and embarrassed, not angry. Her tone was gruff and hostile, much like it had been when they first met. Shizuru slowly followed her into the apartment and calmly shut the door, testing the waters. "I know it was embarrassing to walk in on that, but why are you so upset?" "I'm not." "And I'm Catherine the Great," Shizuru countered. She gave Natsuki a fairly sad smile. "I'll make it up to you somehow. Why don't we go take a day trip on your bike next Saturday?" The grip Natsuki had on her chopsticks was so fierce that she was just shy of snapping one of them in half. "Of course, because next Saturday is the fourth Saturday in June. I'm allowed to see you on that day." "I'm busy. Those are the only free days I have," Shizuru lied. Natsuki, with greatly restrained anger, sat her chopsticks down next to her unfinished bowl of ramen. "Don't worry, I can tell. It must be hard to talk to your friends with your tongue down someone's throat, or somewhere else for that matter." "Perhaps. I wouldn't know. I've never tried to converse with anyone while I was in the middle of a kiss. Next time I'll call someone in the middle of it all and see how it goes," Shizuru taunted in her usual goddamned fashion, never taking anything seriously. "Really, now, Natsuki, what kind of talk is that?" The biker continued to hold an almost vicious gaze on her. "I'm saying that I didn't realize that sleeping with you was a prerequisite for spending time with you. Your classes are online. You don't have a set schedule. So don't give me that 'I don't have any time for you' bullshit that you've been dishing out for the last few weeks." "Online or not, I do have to spend time on coursework, you know," Shizuru defended, finally growing more somber in her speech. Her gaze hardened ever so slightly, biting back to urge to tell her just what she'd been thinking since the end of their adventure. "Well, it's a school night. Shouldn't you be doing your work instead of letting someone you recently met have her way with you?" Natsuki practically hissed. Shizuru rose both her eyebrows in some quiet form of shock. She was certainly not expecting this kind of hostile reaction. "Natsuki thinks me a whore, then? For someone to think such things about their closest friend – how tragic." In that moment, Natsuki was unable to tell whether or not Shizuru was being sarcastic. It was difficult to judge sometimes. Especially if it was a fight. That superficial Fujino politeness and manipulation showed itself. She much preferred Tanya's tendency to swear or throw fists at an offender. "I didn't say that." "Then you think that I should devote every waking moment of my life to entertain you?" Shizuru continued, going on the offensive, preventing Natsuki from dominating the conversation with accusations. "I did not do that even when I was following you like a stray dog. Then again, I did not see Natsuki much in those days. She was quite busy having adventures without me. Perhaps you do not like a taste of your own behavior." "My own behavior...?" Natsuki echoed. She stood, slamming the chopsticks right into her noodles. Such utter disrespect. "Is that what this is? I wouldn't fondle you, so you're running out to fool around with a woman just to spite me? I didn't realize the 'you hurt me, so I'll screw someone just like you to make me feel better' man law applied to you." Shizuru's jaw tightened, the tension mounting when Natsuki stood up. Being lower was submission. Being level was true competition. It was a subtle, unspoken, primal reaction. Like two wolves battling for the rank of alpha. "Yes. The world so obviously revolves around Natsuki in such a manner." Natsuki scrunched up her face in offense. "I don't see what else it could be. You were never desperate to run around with people before I hurt your precious Kyoto pride by not letting you into my bed. Willingly, anyway." Shizuru was silent for a moment, and Natsuki regretted the words. She did not have time to apologize, however, because it didn't take long for Shizuru to press forward. Both were stubborn women. When they got into a real fight, which was rare but had happened before, neither backed down. "Of course you cannot see what else it could be. It must be hard to see anything outside of the very centralized Kugaland." She was not a theme park, dammit. Shizuru was the one offering all the rides, now wasn't she? She gritted her teeth. "It might very well be," Shizuru continued on, "that I was tired of running after someone who wanted nothing to do with me. It might be that I was tired of being alone for so long and I wanted someone to genuinely love me back. If you think you have been demoted from your place as my most valued person, then you are wrong. If you were in danger, I would defend you to the death. But I have a life outside of you, as hard as it is for you to believe that, and I'm moving forward with it. It's not as if I was a pure and untainted virgin when we met." Natsuki slowly considered the statement. "So those rumors about Reito were true, then?" "I dated him not long after I started attending Fuuka, before you and I were friends. It was only for a short time. Now, what other personal questions about my sex life could you possibly ask me? Do you want to know if I'm a screamer or not? What my favorite position is? Whether I prefer to use my hand or my tongue?" The words themselves were scathing and Natsuki didn't care to hear them. They were delivered, however, in serious monotone. "No, I really don't want to know about your sexual exploits," Natsuki countered, looking away, disgusted. "Then you should stop concerning yourself with them and mind your own business," Shizuru said. Not once had she betrayed anger through her voice. Perhaps through her eyes, but never the voice. Calm and almost frightening. "It is my business if I can't even talk to my best friend except for on scheduled days, like I'm being visited from some divorced parent." She took a step dangerously close, their bodies almost touching. "So that was it, then? You won't spend time with someone who simply wants to be your friend? If I kissed you, would that allow me back into your empty social circle?" Natsuki truly did pity the woman before her while still managing to feel guilty despite her rage. To have gone so long without saying anything, only to realize that she was pursuing someone who did not want her. It was (pathetic) something that made Natsuki feel in debt to her. That, coupled with the desperation that had mounted lately, forced her to act brash and reckless. "Don't be such a fool, Natsu--" The look of irritation on her face instantly shifted to shock as warm lips more or less smashed against hers, Natsuki closing the distance between them. Shizuru was frozen for what felt like an eternity as she struggled between her instincts and her logic. The former won. Though she knew it was stupid beyond all belief, she felt herself giving in, not willing to miss such a chance. Shizuru cupped Natsuki's cheek and began to kiss her back, slipping her tongue into her mouth and pulling her close with the arm that still held the DVD. After a short while, it was painfully obviously that Natsuki was mentally detached from the entire gesture. The harder Shizuru kissed, and even as she trailed her hand down from Natsuki's cheek to the side of her chest, the less reaction she got. Not that she had gotten one in the first place. Natsuki was merely standing there, letting Shizuru do whatever she pleased in some failing attempt to put the attention back on her rather than Aya. Who knew where her mind was. It just served to irritate Shizuru more. Who was the whore now? She pulled away, letting Natsuki go, cursing herself for her weakness. She roughly shoved the DVD into Natsuki's hands. "Do not start things you are incapable of finishing. Really, such a selfish brat. I am not your plaything." Natsuki clenched the box with a great ferocity, the taste of Shizuru's lip balm still on her own mouth. The Kyoto woman turned with a neutral expression on her face and headed towards the door, opening it delicately before stepping into the hall. She turned back for just a moment, her expression still unreadable. Natsuki stared back, still quite upset. "And for the record, I did nothing to you that night other than hug you. Because you needed it," Shizuru said coldly. "The worst thing I ever did was steal a kiss from you the next day when Haruka and Yukino decided to arrive. Don't ever try to hold something like that over my head again." The door was shut, leaving Natsuki alone with her own thoughts of betrayal and embarrassment. What the hell had she just done? She slid the DVD back where it was to properly resign and sat back down on the couch for the umpteenth time that day, wishing she had invested in a punching bag earlier. Natsuki shook her head. Perhaps when Shizuru could get the hell over their relationship issues things would be fine, she thought, not realizing that everything she had done only worsened the problem due to her own possessiveness. The way the story was supposed to go was Shizuru moving in on her and Natsuki blushing and almost like a game, by then, telling her to back off. She was used to that. A creature of habit, trying and failing to bring her life back to what it had been. - - - I admittedly have no idea wtf I'm doing here in romanceville. My home is in the land of gore and explosions. :P
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