Slow Like Honey

a Haibane Renmei fanfiction by Ms. Kanzaki

I had to stop you. Ever since I figured what was going on with you.

"Rakka, I'm opening the door".

Even if you would've sealed it with as many locks Hephaestus himself 
had made.

And I see you. On your knees. Broken.

Ready to act as ill-surgeon on yourself. Cut yourself angrily, 
bewildered at your trials.

"Reki... I..."

You sigh. Sadly.

Stop it. Please. I confront you, snatch that wicked toy from your hand, 
embrace you to whatever safety I can offer.

"Reki... I..."

You sigh again. Sadly again.

I answer back in a sigh too. With a voice so unconventional, so no the 
usual me, yet natural... so right...

... so mine.

You moved like honey
In my dream last night
Yeah, some old fires
Were burning

"It'll be alright".

My fingers burying into that uneven honey-tinted hair of yours...

Perhaps I'm dreaming again. 

About bittersweet beauty.

You came near to me
And you endeared to me

It always wakes me up just when it's ready to reach its peak.

... my other hand at your back leaves aside those big bad scissors you 
held earlier against yourself (why should you, of all creatures, 
attempt that?), pushing a bit of you more into me.

But you couldn't
Quit discern me

And so I'm finally awake.

Yeah, I push you into the roughness of my clothes, into that somewhat 
penetrating smell of my favorite tobacco on them, into the raven 
likeliness of my hair...

Does that scare you?
I'll let you run away

I can feel you twist a bit, an uncomfortable prelude to another round 
of uncontrollable sobbing.

You just bang a fist against my chest, cursing something, someone... 

But your heart
Will not oblige you

"It's okay now. It's okay now".

I let go of you, but not completely- both my hands are resting atop 
your slim shoulders. My forehead's resting against yours.

Please tell me... Is this what you want?

You'll remember me
Like a melody
Yeah, I'll haunt the
World inside you

The lack of sound, though golden right now, can be scary too. But thank 
the gods for that smile of yours, though a bit shaky, a bit shadowed 
with your suffering.

It is you who engulfs the whole of me into a savage, desperate embrace.

And my big secret?
Gonna win you over,
Slow like honey
Heavy with mood

Your kiss is savage, desperate, too. Perfect.

I could've never have dreamt of this moment like this.

I'll let you see me
I'll covet your regard
I'll invade your demeanor

Forgive the interruption of your furious, delicious connection. I must 
look at you, one more time, make sure this isn't a reverie of a 
melancholy aged brain, of a heart trapped for aeons in longing...

... For right before you came into this world, my world, I've wanted
you. Loved you.

And you'll yield to me
Like a scent in the breeze

I'll not be denied, my blood thinks out loud. The fragility in your 
eyes mirrors that too.

I'll not let you go denied either.

And you'll wonder,
What it is about me?

Ignore for now who pushed who unto the wooden, unswept floor. We've 
taken that plunge-with-no-return into each other...

It's my big secret,
Keeping you coming
Slow like honey
Heavy with mood

No painter could've thought up a better contrast of pale and lightly 
tanned flesh, against a background that hastily darkens, drinking madly 
at the fewest of day light rays...

... Steady flowing...

Though dreams
Can be deceiving
Like faces are to hearts

... then rushing madly, towards that cascade we're both anxious and 
afraid, yet willing to fall through...

They serve for
Sweet relieving

... oh gods! The swirl! It's all swirling now...

When fantasy and reality
Lie too far apart

... just like breaking out of the cocoon.

So I stretch myself across
Like a bridge
And I pull you to the edge

Panting.

Sweating.

Your angel wings in their whitest suddenly.

And stand there waiting
Trying to attain
The end to satisfy the story

I feel mine too as well. They're encompassed with...

My heart pounding...

... Out of control.  Amid my blood's unusual warmth.

Shall I release you?
Must I release you?

The silence of me beckons you to look up, and witness my agony. Your 
hand travels up my face, and down my throat.

Perhaps my speech shall come alive. But all I can think of is one way 
to do it.

As I rise to meet my glory

Out of instinct, out of this deeper-than-I've-ever-known desire to live 
and die in someone, my lips push themselves onto yours, the softness of 
them making way to the harshness of the battling-for-subduing tongues.

But my big secret?
Gonna hover over your life,

We're doing it all over...

Gonna keep you reaching
When I'm gone like yesterday,

... all over...

When I'm high like heaven,
When I'm strong like music

We share this look of understanding. A heaven like this we created is 
so hard to leave.

'Cause I'm slow like honey, and
Heavy with mood

And it repeats itself. This phenomena of ecstasy, of abandon, of 
rescue. My breath. Like ready to word out something.

Word out something...

... Perhaps my cure. 

A name?  

I don't want to say it. Yet resistance is useless. My lips shall use 
the slightest of air to give a body to my hauntings. 

There they go, in fact...

"Ra- RAKKA!".

Aishteru!

----------------
Author Notes: This design of my imagination takes place in the crucial 
scene of episode 7, where Reki follows Rakka into her room and stops 
her from self-mutilation. Somehow, while I thought of this, Fiona 
Apple's excellent song called "Slow Like Honey" came to mind, and thus 
this songfic came to be. I recommend if you haven't listened to this 
song, please do get, it's from her first album aptly titled "Tidal". 
Comments, suggestions, flames, whatever, to my e-mail: 
subaru_tenshi@yahoo.com

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