Falling
I can't recall exactly how old Mina was in the series or if Suiren's age
was ever mentioned, but please take those and any other improvisations
in stride. I'm just winging it here. ;)
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Koushuu Suiren was in hiding.
It was something rather unthinkable really, but yes, Suiren was once
again in hiding. She had not shown up for work for three days now, and
her... other... duties had also been largely evaded or handled swiftly
on her own.
Drawing her knees up until she could hide her face against them Suiren
tried not to give in to the stinging of her eyes. It was so stupid; she
was stupid... and she had lost something too precious to name because of
it.
The day she in the aftermath of a mission had carried her colleague out
of the burning remains of a building and in relief, heedless of the
cameras directed at them, kissed her when the other had opened her eyes
and wheezed that she was alright.
The day Suiren kissed Mina.
It was just a small kiss really. She had apologized immediately before
running from the scene in horror of what she had done, and she would
gladly apologize every single day from here on out if it meant that the
bond between herself and Mina could be restored.
But despite being just a small, brief thing, the kiss had been rather
clear to all in purpose: Suiren loved her much younger friend, colleague
and partner. Not as a friend should, or even an older sister or mentor,
but simply loved.
Hadn't she known how impossible it was? How wrong it was? Hadn't she
told herself over and over that she had to stop having these thoughts,
these feelings for the girl? Mina was barely seventeen, hardly more than
a child!
A treacherous voice that to Suiren's mind represented her wilder and
more impulsive alter ego, Ootsuki Miina, whispered that if Mina was old
enough to fight and risk her life, then she was old enough to be loved.
No! Even if Mina was old enough to fall in love and maybe start a
relationship by now, well, Suiren herself was just too old by rights to
consider it! She was five years older than Mina for heaven's sake!
Four and a half, the voice corrected helpfully, and what does that
matter? Kiryuu is two years older than you, yet everyone at work are
expecting and even encouraging Mina to hook up with him.
Albeit reluctantly, Suiren had to admit that this was true. She was the
only one at work that had any kind of problem with Kiryuu potentially
dating Mina... in fact, hadn't she driven her motorcycle up to that
remote resort late in the evening solely because it had been suggested
to her that with the two of them alone like that, Kiryuu might just try
something with her sweet, innocent Mina?
Suiren sighed.
No, she shouldn't make Kiryuu out to be a bad guy like this, he didn't
deserve it. He had been a friend for years, and one that had supported
her and Mina both when push came to shove. As guys went, despite the age
difference, he'd be a good choice for Mina. A good boyfriend. He just
wasn't Suiren.
The voice inside was wailing by now: it is not fair; you love her more
than he; you would be better for her; she loves you too!
Fairness had nothing to do with it, and what she could or would be for
Mina was irrelevant. It could never be, and thanks to her slip-up now
Suiren had lost even the friendship they shared.
What a sad truth that Mina had been the first, and so far only, really
truly close friend Suiren had. Was there any aspect of Suiren and her
life that Mina didn't just... get, like no-one else could? Well, save
perhaps for the one aspect that made her kiss the younger girl, of
course.
It was strong, this bond between them. Strong and warm, and it meant
everything to Suiren. Maybe that was part of the problem, maybe it was
just too easy, too tempting, to look at the friendship, the adoration
and the smidgen of hero-worship that Mina still nurtured, and imagine
something more?
She knew she shouldn't indulge herself in fruitless fantasies, but the
memory of a specific moment shared between them was too sweet to resist,
and for just a brief moment Suiren didn't want to fight herself.
They had been falling together through the upper layers of the
atmosphere, Suiren with her larger form angled down in some fruitless
gallant attempt at shielding Mina with her own body as she held her
close. Mina had smiled so tenderly, looked at Suiren so adoringly,
before resting her head on Suiren's ample and ridiculously revealing
cleavage, her face nestled perfectly above Suiren's heart.
It had felt so peaceful, having Mina resting there in her arms, that it
had been easy to forget that they were in fact plummeting down to earth
not knowing if their descent could be stopped. It had just been too
perfect a moment for such thoughts.
In some ways Suiren could picture herself there now, still falling,
still holding that precious treasure, lit up by the flames behind her
and embraced by the dark star-strewn sky. Falling forever.
Closing her eyes Suiren allowed herself to drift away to that memory.
Weary as she was from three days of internal struggles, sleep found her
quickly.
-----------------------
Waking was slow and reluctant, her body protesting that it was robbed of
much-needed sleep, yet something was nonetheless calling Suiren awake.
Distantly and sluggishly she registered a muffled thump. A moment later,
a louder one.
She opened her eyes just in time to see a very familiar form coming out
of her bathroom.
"Mina." She greeted casually while trying to remember why the girl had
been in her bathroom to begin with. Finally the fog of sleep lifted from
her mind just as Mina nervously sat down next to her.
"Suiren-senpai, you didn't answer the door and you've disconnected the
phone." Mina said by way of unasked-for explanation, blushing rather
badly. "I climbed in through the window."
The image of Mina somehow hanging outside of her apartment at the fourth
floor, finding and entering through the bathroom window that had been
cracked open a little, derailed Suiren just long enough for the younger
woman to lean in and press her lips to Suiren's.
As kisses go, it was rather brief and Suiren did not have the chance to
gather herself enough to respond, still it managed to be somewhat longer
than the moment of impulsiveness which had caused Suiren's latest
self-enforced seclusion. Distractedly Suiren noted how attractive the
strong rose hue that washed over the face in front of her was, and how
when the pinkness reached to the tip of otherwise unadorned ears it made
her want to kiss them.
Shaking her head a little Suiren tried to regain at least some grasp of
the situation.
"M-Mina! Wha-what... what are you doing?"
Despite being even more nervous and shy in the wake of the sudden and
bold act, the brown eyes that peeked up at Suiren still held a
surprising note of determination. "It is either a response or it is
payback..."
"It all depends on your reaction, Suiren-senpai."
"Payback?" Suiren managed somewhat quietly after a long moment of
silence while Mina waited patiently.
"Yes... if that is the way you want it, senpai, then that made us even
and you don't have to avoid me anymore. You'll come in to work tomorrow
and we'll ask Mutsumune-senpai to help us clear things up with the
viewers."
"I..." Mina fidgeted a little moving ever so slightly closer. "...was
rather hoping you would pick the other option though."
With that it was Suiren's turn to blush, though far more sedately. "I-I,
err, I m-mean..." She closed her eyes for a second, taking a steadying
breath before facing her temptation. "Do you know what you are saying,
Mina?" A choked sound escaped her and she put a hand to her eyes. "What
am I saying... I am too old for you, there are a thousand reasons why
this..."
A pair of slender hands cupping her face stopped whatever else Suiren
was about to say.
"Those are merely excuses. How do you really feel? No reasons, no
rationalizations, just your honest emotions."
Suiren almost had the younger woman sitting in her lap by now, the
gentle hands caressing her face granting her a sense of peace that she
wasn't quite willing to give up. "I... I..."
Seeing Suiren's struggle Mina spoke in soft encouragement. "Would it
help at all if I told you that although I didn't know it then, I fell in
love with you the first time we met?"
They had both been so very young then, the new and aspiring teen sports
reporter and the girl from the loosing team whose hands had been busted
in the game. Suiren had been chewed out by her superior for opting to
interview someone from the losing team rather than the winners, but the
viewers had liked it and in retrospect it had proved one of those small
but very important steps on her career path. It hadn't been work that
had made Suiren's eyes seek out the girl who struggled on despite her
scuffed and bleeding hands; it hadn't been for the sake of a sympathy
interview that she had remained behind to help patch the girl up long
after the others had left.
She had wondered afterwards just what had motivated her choice that day,
but the answer never came to her. The memory itself was clear in her
mind though, so when the same girl years later was introduced to Suiren
as the new teen reporter and Suiren's young colleague it had been
accompanied with a jolt of fascinated recognition. Of course, very soon
afterwards she had been informed that Mina was a colleague in her other
field of work as well, and a deep and solid friendship grew between them
surprisingly fast. Soon they were not just colleagues; they were
partners and best friends. It wasn't Mina's fault Suiren had been unable
to stay like that. It wasn't anyone's fault but Suiren's that once she
loved the girl that dearly her heart simply couldn't stop at mere
'friends'.
"I love you." She had to touch that precious face. "It snuck up on me
while I wasn't aware of it, but I do and I have for a long time."
"Then that is all that matters." Mina leaned into Suiren's hand with
such a sweet smile on her lips. "I love you too... Suiren."
This time when their lips met it wasn't some brief caress that needed
explanation. This time their kiss was long, unhurried and involved, the
kind new lovers delight in and Suiren and Mina were no exception. Suiren
experienced again the strangely peaceful sensation of falling with Mina
in her arms.
A long time later, with Mina draped over Suiren nuzzling her neck and
both of them drifting slowly towards sleep, Suiren still had a few
questions to mumble into soft brown hair.
"Work?"
There was a light giggle against her neck. "The ratings went up, so it's
ok. Mutsumune-senpai says that although we've gotten a few negative
messages sent in the positive response has been overwhelming. Nothing to
worry about."
"And school?"
"Mixed responses. My friends are supportive and most seem to just accept
it, beyond that I don't really care about those that choose to be
morons."
Relieved Suiren allowed herself to drift along the edge of sleep for a
good long while, until another alarming thought decided to make its
appearance. "Mina... your family..."
"Told mom." A yawn interrupted the sleepy words. "Knows I'm staying here
tonight."
Suiren barely resisted the urge to whimper. "S-she knows? And she...
approves?"
"Mnn. 'Proves." A slender hand came up to touch Suiren's lips. "Shush.
Sleep now."
With a helplessly fond smile Suiren gave the fingers a little kiss
before complying with the request, tightening her arms a little more
around the young woman who was clearly more or less already sleeping. As
the last of the tension she had carried drained away, Suiren happily
surrended to sleep, warm and loved at last.
And she dreamt of stars.
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