Hey Jealousy
"Like the very gods in my sight is he who
sits where he can look in your eyes, who listens
close to you, to hear the soft voice, its sweetness
murmur in love and laugher, all for him.
But it breaks my spirit, underneath
my breast all the heart is shaken.
Let me only glance where you are, the voice dies.
I can say nothing."
-Sappho of Lesbos
Look at them. He's so handsome, and she thinks he's the greatest thing
since sliced bread.
That used to be me. The way she holds him, the way her face lights up
when she's with him...how long ago was it that she was clinging to my
arm, looking at me like I was the greatest thing since sliced bread?
It hurts, to know you're so easily replaceable.
He saved her life, so she fancies herself in love with him.
I spent years taking care of her. I held her all night and let her cry
when her father walked out. Every time she scraped her knees on the
playground, I walked her to the infirmary and held her hand while the
nurse sprayed her cuts with antiseptic. I came to visit her every day
when she had the mumps.
I know everything about her. Her greatest fears, her biggest quirks, her
favorite food, color and season.
All he knows is her name.
God, you're stupid, Miaka! How can you be in love with someone who only
knows your name?! How do you know he's not secretly an axe murderer?
...Okay, maybe that's going a little far. But still. You chose this
stranger over your best friend, the person who knows you better than
anyone.
I should hate you. You chose Tamahome. You forgot about me.
But it's not your fault...not completely, anyway. You've always been so
naive and easily starstruck, and that Tamahome's such a sweet talker he
almost made me fall for him. He drew you in with that smile, those eyes,
that voice...
They're kissing now, and I can't take it anymore. I run, tears streaming
down my cheeks, my heart feels like lead. As I fall to the ground, I
don't even notice the dirt scraping my knees and ruining my skirt.
It was easier when I thought I loved Tamahome.
Lies don't hurt as much as truth.
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