Pain and Suffering "Quistis! Xu, Report." Squall shouted into his headset. His team had just made their way into the basement of Artemis Czar's sprawling abode. Zell stood on his toes and pressed his face to a high window. "Oh crap man that looks bad!" Irvine, being taller was able to see clearly. "He's right boss, one of the building just blew itself into a crater. Any luck getting Quistis on the horn?" "Damn it, no. Xu cut me off." Squall frowned. "What do we do? Subterfuge isn't an option, everyone within miles knows we're here now. Do we go help?" Irvine asked. "No, the mission goes on. Irvine's right there's no point sneaking about now. Lets hurry upstairs, before it hits the fan." Squall shouted, running towards the stairs. "Dude what about the students, Rinoa? Aren't you worried man?" Zell shouted. "Quistis can handle it." Squall snapped irritably. Of course he was worried, about all of them. However the fact remained, there was a job to do first. "Be safe." He murmured quietly as they made their way deeper into the house. ************************ "Quistis!" Xu shouted tugging on her arm. "Come on girl we have to get clear until we put the fire out." "Fujin." Quistis said softly, it was all she could manage. Her shock was so complete that it felt as though it would strike her dead. It took all her willpower not to give into her emotions, to curl up and loose herself to anguish. "I know hon, come on. It'll be okay." Xu tried to assure her. Quistis still couldn't hear her but followed, still clutching Fujin's ruined weapon. "Royce? Fujin, Aeka, can you hear me?" Xu called into her headset. She wasn't honestly expecting a reply but she had to at least try. "We've got incoming!" Celest shouted pointing to a swarm of cloudy figures rising from the ground. Leveling her rifle, she channeled burst of magic into it and fired. The shot blasted through the ghostly creature's head but it kept coming. The other students promptly went on the offensive. All out warfare soon erupted as spells and weapons clashed with the ghostly forces. Suddenly the surrounding fires began to dim and the undead masses gained a noticeable boost in morale. Xu, was not a fighter in any real sense, her only weapons was a small handgun and the uncanny ability to dodge out of the way. She focused more on trying to get a handle on what they where facing. Quistis looked up slowly, it took her only moments to gather her resolve. Now was not the time to loose control. With a calculating move she made one slashing strike with her serrated whip, easily slicing one of the creatures in half. She groaned and put the weapon away as the two halves sprouted into two identical creatures. Looking around she noticed various students facing a similar problem. "Xu get clear, I need you back at the Ragnarok, get our communications back up with Balamb. Tell them what happened." She ordered. "You've got to be kidding. No way I'm leaving you like this." Xy protested. Quistis shook her head. "I can't hear you! Just get out of here." She shouted. Rinoa ran up to them looking worried. "Guys what do we do, this could get ugly?" She shouted over the noise. Quistis grabbed her by the arm and pointed to Xu. "Rinoa, I'm glad you’re here. Get Xu safely back to the Ragnarok." "Damn you!" Xu shouted regretfully. "Just go." Quistis pleaded, though she didn't hear Xu she could tell how upset she was. "I'll take care of it." Rinoa sighed sadly as she ushered Xu along. "Celest! Come here!" Quistis shouted. A phantom abruptly shot out of the ground and lunged for her. Backpedaling Quistis raised her hand and cast a spell at the creature. A glowing white aura of energy appeared around the creature. It moaned loudly before exploding into white sparks. Celest jogged over to Quistis's side, she had slung her rifle having resorted to her meager reserve of spells. "I'm deaf, I need you to be my ears." Quistis said grimly, dusting herself off. "We need to gather everyone to me, I have to end this now so we can regroup." Celest was about to protest seeing as everyone had their hands full just trying to keep the creatures at bay. "Damn it just do it, I have to focus." Quistis shouted angrily. Celest winced but didn't take it personally, Quistis looked absolutely haggard and stress was showing clearly on her face. "Everyone this is Celest, I need all teams to center on my position immediately!" Celest called into her headset. ********* "What happened!" Seifer roared grabbing Nida by the shoulders and shaking him violently. Seifer's guards tried in vain to break them apart but Seifer's strength was undeniable. "Let me go you lunatic! I don't know, what happened I lost contact with them!" Nida shouted. "We've got to do something." Selphie said frimly. "There is trouble." Edea said breezily walking onto the bridge. "Matron! You have to let me go help. I know what Griever is capable of!" Seifer shouted letting Nida go. "Why should we trust you, you could very well be trying to team up with it." Selphie said accusingly. "I'm getting a visual from the Ragnarok!" Nida shouted. "Oh Hyne." He groaned fearfully. The scene was best described as nightmarish; there had obviously been an explosion. People where running about wildly in the moonlight, bizarre figures drifting after them. It was hard to see exactly from where the Ragnarok stood but it was clear enough to tell things had gone terribly wrong. "Matron please, you got to let me go." "It is not my decision to make child." Edea said mournfully. "Well who's decision is it then damn it!" Seifer shouted in exasperation. "Since contact is broken with the others that would leave it Nida's choice." Edea said simply. "What!?" Seifer gawked. "Yup Nida, since only we're the only two senior SEED's here and I've been pulled off active duty, that leaves him in charge." Selphie explained, in a somewhat bitter tone. "Balamb, this is Xu over!" Called Xu, her signal was barely audible. "Thank goodness you're alright! What happened is everyone okay?" Nida blurted. "One of the munitions buildings exploded and we're under attack by enemy forces. These are different from the ones earlier; they're immune to most forms of attack. Also, I'm afraid we lost Fujin, Aeka and Royce." Nicole cried out and staggering back in shock. "Aw no." Selphie murmured and sat down heavily. Seifer's expression quivered and his hands clenched so tight that his nails dug into his palm. "Understood, how's you're position. What is Squall's and his team's status." Nida said asked quietly. "They're okay, they are presumed to be continuing the mission objective. Quistis has taken control of the battlefield, I believe she can handle it." "Tell her to send the Ragnarok, I'm going to them." Edea said calmly. Nida nodded. "Xu, we need to you send the Ragnarok. Edea is going to meet up with you." "I'll see what I can do." Xu replied. "Right, be careful." Nida sighed. Shaking his head he looked down sadly. "This is bad." Seifer turned and sat down quietly on floor near Selphie. "You're bleeding." Selphie said hollowly. Seifer looked at the blood running down his hand and sighed. ******************************** "Rinoa." Xu said. "Yeah." Rinoa answered in a solemn tone. "Can you fly the Ragnarok?" "What?" "Can you fly the Ragnarok?" "A little, Zell and Squall gave me a few lessons." "Take it back to Balamb and pick up Edea, she's coming here." "But I barely know what I'm doing. You can't expect me to fly it with it busted up like that." Rinoa complained. "Are you going to do it or not?" Xu sighed rubbing the bridge of her nose. "I can try." Rinoa said giving in. "The auto-pilot should be able to handle it, I need you to just be there incase it gets out of hand." She explained. "Okay, I guess I'll go, are you okay here by yourself?" "Yes." Xu said darkly, staring into her laptop. Rinoa nodded and made her way inside the ship. Once on the bridge she settled into the pilot's seat and stared at the controls blankly. "I can't remember any of this." She sighed. "Where the heck is the auto pilot?" A quiet beep caught her attention and she looked down. A blinking switch caught her attention. "Oh yeah?" She remembered and flipped it. Without warning the ship's engines ignited and within moments the craft was airborne. Xu ducked flying debris and held her laptop steady as the roar of the engine's buffeted her. The Ragnarok hovered a moment before shooting off into the night sky. ****************** Aeka awoke to find that her head was killing her. Sitting up, she looked around weakly trying to get her bearings. It was dark, the only light coming from the smoldering embers that drifted down from a shaft that stretched far above her. She stood gingerly, her head swimming dizzily. She remembered the fire, and a crate exploding. Then she remembered being pushed. "Royce! Fujin!" She screamed as she recalled what happened. They had almost made it out of the building, then a crate exploded, dropping the ceiling and blocking their exit. They tried to find another way out then Fujin spotted an elevator. Looking around again Aeka realized she was indeed at the bottom of an elevator shaft, on top of the elevator itself to be precise. It wouldn't work, so they had prepared to climb down when another explosion brought down more of the ceiling. Royce was cut off from them unable to get around a pile of burning debris. The last thing Aeka remembered was Fujin shoving her into the open elevator shaft. "Royce!" She called again pleadingly. No answer came. Looking up, some twenty feet she saw the shaft sealed by burning rubble. "Fujin!" She called, praying for an answer. No answer, in a growing state of panic she clambered around in the darkness looking for someway to get out. Finally she found something she hoped was a lever and yanked it with all her might. There was a click and she soon found herself falling again. Luckily the fall was short; staggering to her feet she was relived to find the elevator door's open and leading into a room. Cautiously she poked her head out; the room was lit with ominous, red emergency lighting. Water sloshed around her feet as she walked, the area was flooded to about her ankles. "Hello?" She called meekly, wherever she was it was cold. The room was sparse except for a desk that next to a security door. A cup of coffee and a doughnut sat unattended on the desk, as if someone left it in a hurry. She approached the security door cautiously, beside the doorknob was a keypad that was blinking erratically. She looked at the door a moment, her mind going back to all the late night horror movies she had watched with her friends. Some hormone-laden teen would go up to a strange door in the dark and open it, only to be impaled by a hacked to death by a madman with a knife. "Like I needed to think that." She grumbled to herself. Taking a deep breath she tried the door, with a click it swung open easily. There were no monsters waiting to eat her brains or madmen with knives, only a long dark hallway lined with doors very similar to the one she just opened. The emergency lights flickered and buzzed erratically, she could only assume they'd soon go out and she'd be stranded, fumbling around in the darkness. Having lost her night vision goggle in the chaos prior to the explosion, she'd given anything for a flashlight. Steadying herself mentally she took a deep breath and tried to relax. Unsure, as to which way to go she decided to head towards the end of the hall, hopefully there'd be exit. She tried her best to keep her mind off the possible fates of her friends, she keep telling herself that Fujin had experience and would see all of them through this safely. She giggled slightly; she could imagine them all wondering where she was, sitting around, mission over, bragging, sharing stories. "And here I am stumbling around in the dark like a idiot." She sighed. ******************* Quistis stood quietly eye's closed, trying to focus and gather strength. Meanwhile the cadets had gathered around her in a defensive pattern. Trying desperately to hold off the swarms of creatures that pushed ever closer. "Quistis hon I hope you have a plan, this is -not- a situation I call optimistic." Celest said with a half-smile. "Everyone down." Quistis shouted suddenly opening her eyes. It'd been a long time since she called upon the forces of her blue magic, especially the more destructive ones. A globe of swirling white light erupted from her spreading outward. Celest squinted and looked up in wonder as the globe encircled their group and engulfed the legion of wraith like monsters. She felt nauseous as the wave passed through her, as if the world started to roll back and forth like a turbulent ocean. One by one each creature was trapped in a sphere of crackling white energy and lifted into the air. Overhead a vortex of glowing white energy swirled and sparked angrily, Quistis was directly under the eye of the storm standing calm, her brow glistening with sweat as she struggled to maintain control of the storm. **************** "Whoa! Check it out!" Zell shouted grabbing Irvine by the ponytail and pointing out through a large bay window. "Hey you little punk watch the...hair." Irvine trailed off. Squall turned to see what was going on just as a white light exploded into the room. The entire building started shaking and soon it rumbled down to its foundation. Outside, white clouds swirled overhead forming what looked like a small hurricane. Sheets of lightning struck the ground in rapid bursts sending debris flying everywhere. Suddenly a multitude of glowing spheres rose from the ground. They hung in the air a moment before being sucked in and devoured by the accelerating vortex. As soon as the last sphere entered the clouds the entire thing exploded into a terrible shower of crackling energy, the shock wave shattered every window within a mile radius, blowing Squall, Irvine and Zell hard to the floor. Then abruptly all was quiet. ***************** "What the holy hell was that!" Celest shouted in bewilderment as she struggled to her feet. Quistis opened her eyes and tottered slightly before falling to her knees. "Whoa, hey!?" Celest crouched by her worriedly. "You okay, that was some impressive light show?" Still quite deaf Quistis didn't respond. She felt horrible, drained, it'd been too long since she had to use something of that magnitude. Not prepared for the drain the magic demanded it was all she could do to stay conscious. Thoughts of Fujin kept her awake and focused. Whatever the outcome, she would not rest until she found her. *************** Zell coughed up a cloud of dust as he rolled over on his back and groaned. The blast caught him off guard and he fell hard. "Thank goodness." Squall sighed, sitting up. "Was that a shockwave pulsar?" Irvine asked rubbing his head. "Yeah, Quistis learned it during the fight with Ultimecia." Squall explained. "That was cool, I bet that took out whatever they were having trouble with. Way to Miss Trepe, kick ass!" Zell shouted excitedly. "Quit standing around we have to hurry." Squall ordered. The three of them made their way into the heart of the house. A large living room stretched out before them, the one room was easily as large as one of their apartments. A massive television dominated one of the far walls and a fully stocked bar adorned the other. "Killer pad man." Zell whistled. "Anyone want a drink?" Irvine chuckled examining a bottle of wine. "Cut the antics, Zell which way?" Squall scowled. "Um, lets see." Zell grumbled trying to remember the floor plans the mayor gave him. He turned thoughtfully and pointed to an ornately carved wooden double door. "Through there, it should lead to the nurse's room, den, and master bedroom. "Hey boss, I'm beginning to get a funny thought." Irvine said, looking around with a frown. "Speak your mind." Squall said curiously. "We've yet to encounter any resistance, and Quistis and her group sound like they're fighting a war." "Yeah man, it's weird, especially now that it's hit the fan, someone or something should've found us. I mean we're not being terribly subtle." Zell added as he headed toward the doors. "Shit!" Squall spat as if something bad dawned upon him. Zell and Irvine looked at each other in surprise at Squalls momentary outburst. "You're right, this whole thing stinks." Squall cursed and drew his gunblade. "What's up boss?" Zell asked looking about cautiously. "This has to be a set up, either to lure us away or a trap." Squall frowned then tried his headset again. "Xu are you there?" "Squall! Great to hear your voice, sorry to keep you waiting, thing's are a mess down here." Xu apologized. "Hold on a moment." Squall said, then looked at Zell and Irvine. "Stay put guys." "Aren't we checking the rest of the place out? We're almost there." Zell said reaching for the double doors. "Stop, don't open those doors, we're in a weapons plant, I wouldn't be surprised if this whole place it rigged to blow. We proceed with caution." Squall said dangerously. Zell pulled his hand away as if burned. "Dude this sucks." He frowned. Squall switched attention back to Xu. "Okay, Xu give me a report, how are you doing?" "I think Quistis has it under control. I'm trying to reestablish all our links, the explosion damaged some of my equipment." Xu paused and sighed, she hated this part. "We have casualties." She said quietly. Squall winced but kept calm. "How many?" He asked darkly. "Five total, and about seven wounded." Xu answered. "Fuck!" Zell blurted in a mix of shock and anger. Irvine stiffened and took off his hat sadly. "Who'd we loose?" Squall asked. His heart hammering in his chest, praying Rinoa's name wasn't mentioned. "Christine, Trent, Aeka, Royce." She paused to gather herself. "And Fujin." She said quietly. Squall nodded solemnly. "Keep me informed if the situation changes." He said simply and looked to the others. "Let's go." Irvine shook his head and shouldered his rifle and headed toward the doors. Zell stood a moment as if lost in thought causing Squall and Irvine exchanged wary glances. "That ain't fair." He abruptly shouted. "Zell." Squall sighed. "It's not man!" "I know, there's nothing we can do." Squall said softly. "This rots man, it's full of shit!" Zell cried out in exasperation. "Zell, come on, we'll all mourn later. Squall's right though, there isn't anything we can do now. The main thing is to stop this mess before anyone else dies." "DAMN IT!" Zell shouted again before going on rampage through the living room, chairs, painting, wood and glass, nothing escaped his wrath. Irvine and Squall watched him sympathetically. Zell was always one ruled by his emotions. In a way, Squall envied him at least he expressed them freely. Moving towards him, he put a reassuring on his shoulder. "Lets go." He said quietly. "They're kids man. That ain't right." Zell cried. "It's not right at all." "They knew what they signed up for, just like we did. Trying to do the right thing hurts sometimes." Irvine sighed. "Still." Zell sighed, his face taunt with sorrow and anger. "We have to go, now!" Squall said in a respectful but firm tone. "If Luccian's not here, we've got to find him before he tries to escape. The longer he eludes us the stronger Griever will become." Zell nodded, his expression twisting into mournful scowl. "Let's go kick his ass." "Right." Squall nodded in agreement. Irvine stood before the door with his gun leveled. Squall too had his gunblade loaded and ready to fire. Zell knelt and examined the door cautiously, checking for any suspicious wiring. Satisfied, he stepped back and nodded. Irvine took a step forward and with one mighty kick, smashed in the door. All three rushed inside ready to fight. Squall was correct in assuming Luccian would be ready for them. What waited for them beyond the door was nearly beyond description. A blinding white skeletal creature bathed in a green aura. Its form was humanoid, with bizarrely long limbs ending in wicked scythe like claws. Its head was like a lion's and from it's stooped back flapped two sets of angelic wings. The thing's tail, similar to a scorpion's but far more flexible, swayed lazily behind it. The unnatural green aura shone upon them brightly causing them to pause. Then, almost as if bored it opened it maw and from it issued forth a roar so terrible it rattled them to the core. The vibration shattered the walls, and knocked Irvine's and Squall's weapons from their hands. To add insult to injury the force of it slammed the three of them back into the living room. Squall was first one to his feet. He snarled and started to call forth a Guardian to assist them. The shimmering image of Ifrit started to manifest around him and the creature beyond the doors locked its eyes on him. The thing's eye's glinted with a malevolent spark and the ghostly image of Ifrit roared in pain then vanished into a puff of smoke a fire. Squall's eye's rolled back into his head and he collapsed back into Zell's arms. Irvine, always prepared, stepped in front of them and from under his coat pulled out a shotgun. Without a second thought he opened fired. The blast caught the beast square in the face. Howling in pain the creature shimmered translucent and started to sink through the floor. Irvine ran to the spot, hoping to follow but was sorely disappointed, the creature had escaped. A quick check over revealed all three of them were bleeding from their ears and noses. "That was Greiver! Downstairs!" Squall groaned, trying to stand. "Dude are you alright!" Zell asked, worried. "Ifrit. My junction shattered." Squall choked, feeling drained, and spent. "Just like with Ultimecia, we have to get him fast, the longer this takes the worse he's gonna break us down piece by piece." Zell shouted. "I got a good hit on him." Irvine nodded. "You were right Squall, he's no where near full power." "That’s why we better hurry." Squall grunted as Zell and Irvine helped him to his feet. "You going to be okay?" Zell asked holding him by the arm. "Yeah, Eden's taking over." Squall nodded, one of the benefits of having multiple guardians, was that if one was taken out the others could take up the slack. By the time the three of them reached the lower floor Squall was back to form. ************************ By the time Rinoa arrived back at Balamb Garden, Edea was waiting for her in the clearing outside. Seifer, Nicole and Selphie stood with her waiting patiently. Seifer's guards had been dismissed and he stood behind Edea. The Ragnarok landed fast and the hatch was already opening before the ship had even settled. Rinoa burst from the hatch in a near panic. "I'm am not Flying that thing again!" She shouted angrily. "Why what happened?" Selphie asked. "Stupid auto pilot flies like a madman. It took off without me telling it to!" Rinoa pointed in exasperation at the head of the ship. "You probably hit something by accident." Nicole said. Edea moved past them and headed up the ramp Seifer followed behind her wordlessly. "I'll fly!" Selphie volunteered, of course everyone knew she had an ulterior motive, but the fact remained, she was better trained to fly the ship than Rinoa. "Very well child, hurry along. Time is of the essence." Edea sighed. "You guys please be careful." Nicole called to them as they climbed aboard and closed the hatch. Selphie hopped into the pilot's seat and rubbed her hands together. "Okay let's see." She mumbled, flipping switches. Soon they were aloft and well on their way. The journey back to the compound took longer than any of them would've liked. Edea sat quietly in her seat, a meditative look in dark eyes. No one had spoken since lift off and the silence was unnerving. Rinoa sat back, sullen and quiet, so many thing's had gone wrong and so fast. Seifer sat by her side; he too was withdrawn and brooding. Rinoa slowly looked over at him and their eyes met. She offered a small somber smile. "How have you been?" She asked having a terrible urge to talk to someone, anyone. "What?" Seifer asked dully, his mind obviously not paying attention. "You're looking good, bulked up some." Rinoa shrugged. "I guess I should go live on a island for a year, I'm to soft." She sighed, feeling stupid. Seifer sat up and blinked in confusion before looking at her flabbergasted. "What?" He said again, looking at her bewildered, she'd successfully gotten his attention. "Sorry." She said sheepishly. "I'm stressed out, it helps me to talk to someone." "Oh." He nodded, his voice was morose, and no longer had the edge it usually carried. Rinoa remembered that voice; she remembered how he could be at times. Soothing, calm, passionate, she had no regrets about leaving him, but she did remember what they shared during that brief time before everything went wrong. "It's no fun, I don't recommend it." Seifer said dryly. "I was kidding." Rinoa sighed. "I know." "You alright?" She asked. "No." "I take it you heard." "Yes." "I feel like I have to apologize." Rinoa sighed sadly. "Why?" "I treated her like crap." "Why? I'm the one who caused all the trouble." Seifer admitted with a frown. "Fujin never asked for any of it." "It's honestly not about you." "What then?" "I don't know, I'm just selfish, a selfish brat." She sighed rubbing her temples. "No you're not. When we were together." He started, then frowned he didn't mean to go there. No reason bringing up painful memories. "I mean, you were always generous." He continued. Rinoa shrugged. "It's just that, me and Quistis used to be like sisters. We used to do everything together. A few months ago she got moody and stopped coming around, not one hardly saw her, it got to the point sometimes we had to nearly drag her out of her apartment. Then Fujin appears out of the blue, and all of a sudden Quistis starts spending all her time with her while I get put on the back burner." Rinoa sniffed slightly and frowned. "Hyne, I'm a idiot. I'm just a stupid girl who needs to grow up. Everyone was right, I don't know anything about the real world. I treated her like dirt, because of my on selfish reasons and now she's gone and there's nothing I can do." Seifer looked at her a moment and shook his head. "Why are you confessing this me this Rinoa?" He said quietly. "You've hardly said two words to me hardly since I've been back." "I know." She mumbled. "I just needed to get it out, I feel horrible, she just wanted to be accepted and we all treated her like a monster. As for not talking to you sooner, you've got to understand. I mean, what could I've said?" She sighed sadly. "Oh hi Seifer, I haven't seen you since you tried to feed me to Adel." Seifer winced. "I'm sorry about that, things were." He sighed and looked up. "Everything just, it was not supposed to be like this." "I know." She said softly. "Sometimes, nothing seems to go right." "Can you forgive me?" "I already had, it wasn't your fault." She smiled gently. "I'm not sure." He said quietly, barely a whisper. "What are you saying." She frowned slightly. "I've discovered, there's a part of me." He frowned, pondering how best to explain. You heard what happened? With Fujin, all those years ago." He mumbled sounding small, nearly afraid. "Yes, Squall told me." She nodded, not really wanting to think about it. "It's true, all of it." He admitted with a shrug. "I didn't want to believe it." She admitted sadly. "I snapped, I." He shook hung his head and looked at his hands. "Squall, we always competed, always. That day we fought, fought hard, at some point..." He shook his head not wanting to think about it. Never before had he really looked back on that horrible day. "At some point." He continued. "It stopped being a simple sparring match. Squall beat me, beat me sound. All I remember was, that I wanted to hurt him, make him pay for embarrassing me. I was supposed to be the best." He frowned; he could feel Rinoa's eyes on him yet she said nothing. "I decided then I would kill him, I was irrational, he took from me all I ever cared for, my pride. It's all I had then, it was all foolish, stupid." He rubbed his face angrily and growled in aggravation, more at himself than anything else. "Fujin was there, she grabbed me, stopped me. Squall left and she yet she still held me. I was so angry; she got in the way, made me look like an even bigger fool. I could've imagined Squall laughing at me. I looked at her, I was hurt, she hurt me, how could she have done such a thing, embarrass me like that." Seifer's voice grew low, somber as he remembered that black day. "She looked at me, with those piercing trusting eyes. I knew she loved me, I always have. But at that moment I hated her, I hated Squall, I hated everyone. I don't even remember hitting her, but I know I did. When I realized what I'd done, I thought I killed her so I threw her off the cliff hoping to hid my crime." Seifer looked up, finally facing Rinoa. Tears were in her eyes and a look of hurt confusion on her face. "Of course, she lived. I figured it was only a matter of time, before I was locked away. But then, she did the damnedest thing, she covered for me and told everyone it was an accident. I never knew why, I never asked her, she never mentioned it again, nor did I. Only later did I realize, that in a way I did kill her that dark day. She never smiled again, never laughed, never did the things she used to love to do." He shook his head and wiped his eyes, in annoyance and swallowed hard. "Did you know she was a poet? She told me her mother had taught her how. A long time ago, before any of this I found one of her poems. It's funny I was rooting through her book bag trying to steal answers to a test she'd passed. I had to take it and hadn't studied for it all semester." He chuckled bitterly. "It was folded up all cute and smelled of perfume. Of course being a jerk I opened it and read it." He smiled sorrowfully. "It was about me, full of the whimsical ravings of girl in love, and how in her words, the world revolved around my heavenly countenance." He grew silent; he wasn't sure what he wanted to achieve by telling Rinoa that. Perhaps he needed someone to judge him for his sins. "Part of me went with Edea willingly. I felt, it was my chance to finally achieve all that I was destined for and I would've moved the heavens to do it. You, Squall, Fujin, all of you, to me, you were either tools or obstacles. Everyone was right to not trust me; I'm a monster." He stood up to move away, not feeling worthy to even be close to her. "You've changed though. I mean, you must have, you know you were wrong, right?" Rinoa said shakily her expression torn. She'd never honestly thought Seifer capable of doing all those horrible things on his own. But here he was, baring the whole ugly truth to her. "I'd like to think so." He said softly, looking back to her. "I went to that island to find myself, to discover who, what I wanted to be, and to try and do the right thing. I had dreamed I could come back wash all my sins away, find the happiness I longed for. I guess I was just fooling myself, when Fujin turned me down, the same anger returned, the same feeling of wounded pride." He said sounding truly disappointed. "As hard as I tried, nothing changed, and Fujin knew it." "I don't know what to say." Rinoa frowned; her face was drawn with shock and a deep sense of disappointment. She sniffed, and looked at him. "I mean you pretty much just told me that you honestly wanted us dead, even me. I did nothing to you; you were the one to who ran away from me. Hyne knows the people in Trabia did nothing to you." She hissed under her breath. "Seifer, if Selphie ever hears what you just said, she will kill you. As it stands she just hates you and thinks she's being irrational, and Fujin, poor Fujin, she deserves to have found a friend like Quistis after what you did." She nearly shouted." "I don't know what to do Rinoa, everything's fallen apart. I only wanted to make things right. Griever got free, and now Fujin's gone, I can never make it up to her. There is nothing else for me to do." He sighed and fell back in a seat opposite of Rinoa's Rinoa ran a hand through her hair, this was nearly more than she could bear. "Seifer, tell Edea, she can help you, it's not to late. I truly believe you're not as evil as you try to make out. You can still make amends somehow." "No, I know what I have to do. When this is over, I'm going to Cid and Squall and tell them the truth. I suspect there is more than a few cities that would be happy to put me on trial. It's time I face the repercussions of my actions." He said firmly. Rinoa nodded slowly, she couldn't argue with him if everything he said was true. "I understand." She said quietly. "Thanks." He smiled sadly. "I can't believe this is happening." Rinoa whispered under her breath. Seifer said nothing else for the rest of the trip. Soon the ship's passengers could see flickering glow of fires burning on the horizon. "We're almost there." Selphie announced as she pressed the throttle. With a burst, the Ragnarok shot across the sky and over the horizon.
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