Never Again Will I Slip (part 4 of 10)

a Final Fantasy 10-2 fanfiction by Jessicka Volkinivia

Back to Part 3
Rikku stood on the deck of the Celcius, staring into the oblivion as it 
fly by in a slow, sleepy pace.

Brother was whining about how Yuna could just up and leave like that 
after all they had been through.

He just could not get over his "crush" on her. How old was he? 21, 
22...25? Woouldn't he be a little too.."old" for "crushes"? Well...Rikku 
sure thought he should get his act together. After the events that 
transpired between her and Paine she had become more, 
withdrawn..more...stabilized...not quite as energetic and nowhere near 
as happy.

Even Shinra, who seemed to be always lost in his own world began to 
worry about her. What could change a happy-go-lucky, energetic girl, 
into a mopey, somber, girl, just like that? It would have had to been 
something, terribly bad...

Rikku rolled everything over in her mind leading up to the events 
between her and Paine, as it went like this: Travel all over Spira. Fall 
in love with Yuna along the way. Bashed head against wall to try to tame 
her thoughts and convince herself she's straight. Sleeps with Gippal to 
convince herself as well. Sleeps in Djose temple for a few days. Gippal 
wants more sex. Rikku refuses. Gippal takes it. Rikku pissed, feels 
worthless, used, abused, sluttish. Has to work alongside Gippal to 
defeat Venagun. Rikku can't look him straight in the eye. Falls in love 
with Yuna again, get pissed because she can't get rid of her feelings 
towards Yuna. Paine attempts to comfort Rikku. Rikku refuses again and 
again until Paine, speaks and says: "You know...if you're going to 
refuse help, stop acting like something bothering you. It's annoying and 
it pisses me off. So, either you accept my help or stop acting so 
fucking bummed out. Take your pick." Paine exits. Rikku more pissed. 
Yuna finds Tidus, settles down with him. Brother blames Yuna's exit on 
Rikku, saying she clung too much to her. Rikku sulks and begins to 
believe it. Paine confesses her love for Rikku. Rikku has enough and 
slugs Paine. Paine forget about event. Rikku commands Buddy to go to 
Besaid. Rikku acts as she always does around Yuna, then after her and 
Paine are out of sight, she begins fighting with Paine again. Rikku 
invites Yuna to go on one last mission for the GullWings. Yuna agrees. 
Rikku plots against Paine.. They go to Macalania Woods. Rikku stabs 
Paine in back. Rikku says it's time to go. Yuna agrees. Everyone goes 
their separate ways.

Rikku bit her lip as his face quivered, then her thumb nail with to her 
mouth as she bit on it and tears began to flow from her face. What had 
she done. At the time it felt so right to take her anger out on Paine. 
Paine was always so distant...it was like she wasn't even there..Paine 
was like an inanimate object sometimes...and that time had been one of 
them.

Rikku feel to her knees and cried softly. As she retraced the series of 
events, her mind came to a startling halt. Eventhough it had felt so 
right to take her anger out on Paine, she came to frightening 
realization that, as she let things pile up on her that she had taken 
her anger out on her friend, not her enemy. She couldn't remember the 
last time she had actually cried. She just had to find 
Paine...to...apologize..but...Paine was so...brutal..would she be 
forgiven? Would Paine be able to forgive her, after what she had done to 
her? Rikku slowly stood up and nodded determinately(not sure if it's a 
real word, but go with it, ok?). Even if Paine would not be able to 
forgive her, as long as she did her best, she would be able to sleep a 
little bit better at night. Then a thought hit her and she sat back 
down. Where in the hell would she even begin to look for Paine? 
"Ooooooh...poopie!" She shouted out to no one. Knowing Paine, she wasn't 
the one to likely stay in one place...right?

Ooooh, how wrong Rikku was...

Onwards to Part 5


Back to Never Again Will I Slip Index - Back to Final Fantasy 10-2 Shoujo-Ai Fanfiction