She was reaching to press the doorbell for a second time when the door opened. Her ex-girlfriend offered a hand, which Maya shook carefully without smiling. “Yoshimi, I can’t stay for long, I just want to get the rest of my stuff and go.” By avoiding smalltalk, Maya was hoping to make the whole process easier on herself yet she still had that same gnawing, churning feeling in the pit of her stomach and her heart was beating ten to the dozen. Her ex-lover on the other hand, seemed much calmer, almost serene. “Of course, come on in.” Maya shuddered ever so slightly as she stepped into the familiar room. Nothing had changed since she had last been there, save the fact that now it was no longer the entrance to her own home. Although she didn’t regret leaving, a pang of something akin to homesickness hit her, it was only brief but it caught her off-guard and reaffirmed her desire to keep this visit short. Maya had also been caught out by how attractive she still found Yoshimi, even in the scruffy cutoffs and black vest, her usual attire for slobbing at home. “Would you like a drink?” Maya couldn’t avoid the thirst that had crept upon her making the journey back to her old home in the 95 degree heat. “Umm, just a glass of water please.” Yoshimi winked at her. “Sure. Do you want to sit down down for a few minutes before you start packing? You look like you’re burning up, a rest might do you good.” Against her better judgement, Maya agreed. She sat down at the familiar kitchen table and couldn’t avoid the conversations sparked by her ex-lover. “So, how are you doing Maya?” Maya accepted the glass handed to her with a gracious smile. “I’m fine, thank you. Work has been somewhat hectic this week, there was the citywide power cut I’m sure you know about. Otherwise I’m okay. How about you?” Yoshimi pushed a lock of her thick, jet-black hair behind her left ear and smiled again. “Oh I’m good thanks. The massage business is booming at the moment, everybody is so stressed with all of these attacks on the city, it’s working out great for us at work.” They both smiled awkwardly during the ensuing few second’s silence. “Have you found a place to stay yet?” Maya cleared her throat and raised a cynical eyebrow. “Yes, as it happens, though your sudden concern surprises me. Remind me again, who exactly kicked who out of this apartment?” Yoshimi sighed and looked down at the table. “I can’t defend what I did, Maya, but I still care about your welfare, it’s not like I want you to be on the streets. You could always have stayed here until you sorted yourself out.” Maya snorted indignantly. “And listened to you fucking him in our bed all night? I’d rather sleep in a doorway in the goddamn red light district.” Maya could feel the anger rising inside her, but didn’t stop. “You’ve got a cheek pretending you’re actually bothered about how I’m doing after you told me you never wanted to see me in your house again.” Yoshimi sighed. “I can understand that you’re upset with me Maya, but I was angry then, I know that doesn’t excuse what I said or did, but you have to admit we’ve both said things we didn’t mean when we fought.” “When did you suddenly gain this enlightenment? Or is this just how HE likes you to talk?” Maya was beign highly unreasonable now and she knew it. She hated letting herself get to this stage, so she took a deep breath. “Look, I’ve got no intention of having this discussion with you right now, or ever in fact. I’m just going to pack my cases and go, then you can get on with your life and let me do the same.” “Maya, I know this can’t be easy for you, but it’s hard for me too!” Maya rolled her eyes as she left the kitchen. That remark was so typical of Yoshimi, utterly self-centred woman that she was. When they had been together, Maya had dealt with it graciously, after all, her ex partner had been an overindulged only child so knew no different way to behave. She also had the considerable advantages of seemingly boundless charm when it was useful to her and outstanding physical beauty. Maya had loved her despite the self absorption, it was a result of her circumstances and therefore Yoshimi didn’t really have a choice in it did she? She had been used to the adoration of others and had never wanted for anything her whole life. It had been almost an endearing character trait whilst the two of them were together, but now that she could view Yoshimi objectively, Maya objected on an almost visceral level to the other woman’s blatant histrionics. Without a word in response she made her way towards what had once been their bedroom. It had taken Maya under half an hour to gather all of her belongings together and pack them into her two cases. She dragged them to the front and shot a disapproving glare at the men’s trainers that now stood in the same place her work boots once had. Yoshimi emerged from the kitchen to bid her farewell. She smiled benignly and without warning embraced Maya tightly. Maya did not reciprocate, simply turned on her heels with a curt “Goodbye.” Ritsuko could tell that Maya wasn’t quite feeling herself as soon as she came through the door. Upon questioning she claimed to be fine, thus confirming Ritsuko’s suspicions that all was not well, but pressing the issue didn’t seem fair on Maya. Besides, it wasn’t as if Ritsuko couldn’t guess what had upset her girlfriend. They carried on as usual, enjoying their lazy Saturday evening together. They cooked chilli and ate together, then snuggled close together on the sofa to watch TV and share a bottle of red wine, though their attention was not really on the screen in front of them. They had been together for only three weeks, a period of time they had spent mostly at work or asleep, so the leisure time they had together tended to be spent in physical closeness and the satisfaction of basic desires. Ritsuko lay on her front, allowing Maya to straddle her and massage her shoulders as a thank you from Maya for cleaning up after dinner. She sighed as she felt her muscles relaxing under Maya’s hands. “Mmmm, either I’ve been more stressed than I’ve given myself credit for, or you are incredible at that, Maya, this feels absolutely beautiful.” Maya was grateful that Ritsuko couldn’t see her face, as she blushed pink at the compliment. “Well, you are very tense, especially through your deltoids. You need to cut down on the amount of stress you get at work.” Ritsuko tensed slightly at the mention of work, so Maya pressed harder, eliciting a soft moan from her partner. She pulled back her hands as if she’d been burned. “I’m sorry, am I hurting you?” A lazy chuckle escaped Ritsuko’s lips. “Oh God no, that’s divine, you really need to teach me how to do this, I feel shitty for not being able to reciprocate.” Maya smiled as she eased her grip and places a few kisses down Ritsuko’s back. “Just keep cleaning up after meals, my sempai, and we’ll be even. How do you feel?” Ritsuko mumbled something unintelligible and sighed blissfully. “OK, you stay there for a second whilst I go and wash my hands, take it from me, that oil is not nice anywhere except your skin.” When Maya returned, Ritsuko had rolled onto her back and was watching what had come onto the television, a dubbed late-night show from the states about fetish nightclubs. Maya felt a familiar tingling sensation between her thighs and was sure she was blushing again. Ritsuko smirked cheekily at her. “Not getting any ideas are you, Maya-chan?” Maya giggled a little awkwardly as Ritsuko raised an eyebrow. The older woman held her eyes out to her partner. “Come and kiss me, you exotic, erotic, massage-giving beauty!” Maya laughed as she lay on top of Ritsuko, pressing closely against her along the whole length of her body. She stifled a yawn, which didn’t go unnoticed by her lover. “Tired?” Maya nodded. She was more exhausted emotionally than physically, visiting her old flat had taken its toll on her, as if it was the final item of closure on her relationship with Yoshimi, the final thing she needed before she could move on. As she cuddled Ritsuko, any remaining sorrow dissipated. At that point, in the arms of the woman she had pined for and adored for so long, Maya could not remember a time when she had been happier.
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