To My Beloved Tomoyo

a Card Captor Sakura fanfiction by nanaimoanimefan

WARNING: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH! 

RATED 14+ FOR SUICIDE AND REFERENCES TO NUDITY. 

In this story, Sakura and Tomoyo are about 16. 
 
 

Touya mumbled curses under his breath as he got out of bed. Nature 
calls. "Damn, it sure is hot tonight." He said as he headed for the 
bathroom. Tomoeda was in one of the worst heatwaves in 20 years. During 
the daytime, it wasn't unusual for the mercury to climb above 100. It 
seemed that nights weren't much better either, with the temperature 
rarely dropping below 80. When he was finished, Touya washed his hands 
and threw a few handfuls of cold water on his face to try and cool him 
down. He closed the door and headed for his room. 

Not too far down the block, a petit, black haired girl was also stirring 
in her sleep. But it wasn't because of the heat. She laid there on top 
of her covers, clad only in her underwear with a hurt expression on her 
face. She started crying and simply said: "My happiness is her 
happiness." 

Back at Sakura's house, Kero awoke to Sakura talking in her sleep. She 
was having a nightmare. 

Sakura was running with all her might down the block towards her best 
friends house. When she arrived, she pulled out the sleep card and used 
it to put the Bodyguards to sleep. She used the fly card and in a flash 
she was at Tomoyo's window. She put away her cards and stepped into 
Tomoyo's room. She looked at her bed, expecting Tomoyo to be safe and 
sound in a deep sleep. But she wasn't there. Sakura frantically searched 
for her friend. She was about to leave when she noticed a light coming 
from Tomoyo's movie room. She opened the door and smiled at what she 
saw, it was a film that Tomoyo had made of her and Sakura while they 
were on vacation at Tomoyo's summer home last year. She looked down the 
aisle and saw Tomoyo sitting in the front row, looking at the screen. 
Relieved, she made her way towards her friend. When she got there, her 
heart sank. Her knees grew weak and her eyes started to swell at what 
she saw. Tomoyo was sitting in her favorite chair, still only clad in 
her underwear, now stained with the dark crimson fluid that was still 
dripping from her wrists. In her Right hand was the knife that she used 
to end her pain, in her Left was a piece of paper. Falling to her knees, 
Sakura gently pulled it out of Tomoyo's lifeless hand. It read: 

"Addressed to whomever finds my body:" 

"I'm sorry if my suicide has inconvenienced you and/or anyone else, but 
this was the only way. The only way that I could end the pain. As my 
final wish, I would like to be buried with all of my pictures, Movies, 
and anything else that reminded me of Sakura. Maybe after my death she 
can concentrate on the one that she truly loves. I was only hindering 
this and for that, I will never forgive myself. My happiness is her 
happiness. Please make sure that Sakura does not find me or this letter. 
It will only get in the way of her finding what she truly deserves, to 
be happy." 

                                   Tomoyo D. 

As she finished reading, Sakura looked up at Tomoyo's still tear stained 
face. She looked as happy as she had ever been. Sakura sat in the chair 
next to her and pulled her best friend's limp body onto her lap. "Why 
Tomoyo? Why did you do this? Why did you leave me?!" She cried. She 
brushed Tomoyo's hair away from her face and gave her a kiss on the 
forehead. "I'm sorry Tomoyo-chan." 

She sobbed loudly and cried out at the top of her lungs. "TOMOYO-CHAN!" 

Sakura suddenly sat up in bed, breathing heavily. Her naked body covered 
in a cold sweat. The gentle summer breeze on her skin making it even 
colder. She must have screamed out loud in her sleep because she heard 
loud footsteps in the hall and her door burst open. It was Touya, 
dressed only in his boxers to try and escape the unbearable heat. He ran 
over to her bed, not even noticing that she was naked. Before he could 
even sit down, Sakura jumped to her knees and threw herself into his 
chest, sobbing.  

"Onii-chan!!" She cried. 

Touya sat beside her and placed his hand on her back, which made her 
feel better, yet caused her to cry even more. 

"It's ok Sakura, I'm here." 

She cried into his chest until he pulled her away and asked her what was 
wrong. Still between sobs, she explained to him the horrible things she 
saw in her mind. Touya pulled his baby sister onto his lap and cradled 
her in his arms, choking back his own tears and trying to think of 
something reassuring to say to her. 

"Sakura. Do you think that Tomoyo would ever do what you discribed?" 

Her eyes filled with tears again as she searched for an answer. "I don't 
know." 

"Can you think of anything that would make her want to do that?" 

"No, she always seems so happy, especially when we're together. I very 
rarely see her sad or upset." 

"Then what makes you think that Tomoyo would want to cause you such 
pain?" 

"She wouldn't. She just wants me to be happy. She loves me, and I love 
her." 

Sakura's eyes widened as she remembered the times that Tomoyo said she 
loved her. 

"I think... we're talking about... different kinds of love Sakura." 

"Huh? Did you say something Tomoyo?" "Oh... ask me again... in a couple 
of years."  

"Hey Sakura... could I cut your hair next time? I'm pretty good." "Sure, 
if you want to. But why?" "Because I love you." 

Sakura's eyes filled with tears and she started sobbing again. 
"Onii-chan... I'm so stupid. All those times Tomoyo told me that she 
loved me, I thought she meant as a friend, and here I am crushing her 
feelings because I'm in love with Sayoran!" 

Touya kissed her on her forehead and reassured her that things would 
work out. Sakura was tired. Not just physically, because of her crying. 
But emotionally, from realizing how badly she had been hurting her 
friend all these years by not returning her love. Things would change 
though, Sakura would make sure of it... tomorrow. While being held and 
comforted by her brother, Sakura slowly drifted back to sleep. 

Sakura awoke the next morning to the sound of birds singing in the tree 
outside her window, which was swaying back and forth from the gentle 
summer breeze. She sat up and stretched, feeling much better than the 
night before. She stared off into the distance, trying to remember what 
happened last night. She was brought back to reality by the sounds of 
Touya's snoring. He had been at her desk the whole night, making sure 
she was ok. She looked at him and smiled. She blushed as she looked down 
and remembered that she was still naked. 

"HOEEEEEEEEEE!!" 

Touya jumped out of the chair and cried: "What? What's the matter?" He 
looked at Sakura and flushed. "Sorry!" He said while putting his hand 
over his eyes. He parted two of his fingers and was met with a pillow to 
the face. 

"Onii-chan!! Get out!" 

Touya walked backwards towards the door to leave. When he got there, 
Sakura, who covered herself with her sheets, pushed him out the door 
causing him to fall to the ground. She slammed the door and walked back 
over to her bed, dropping the sheet. Kero sleepily flew into view. 

"Hey, what with all the... ACK!" He said as he saw his mistress standing 
naked before him. She turned a deep crimson as she noticed him looking. 

"KERO!" 

Kero quickly flew back into the drawer and shut it. Sakura sighed and 
walked into her bathroom to take a shower. She turned on the water and 
stepped in. Her heart ached as she remembered her dream from last night. 
With tears flowing, she brought her hands up to her heart and whispered: 
"Tomoyo-chan." When she was done, she dried herself off and headed back 
to her room. She knew today was special. She knew that today was the day 
her life would change forever. She walked to her closet and tried to 
figure out what to wear. Eventually, she picked out a pink polo type 
shirt and a pair of green Kahki shorts and put them on. 

"Kaiju! Breakfast!" Yelled Touya from downstairs. He didn't notice 
Sakura as he turned around and got a swift kick in the shin for his 
Kaiju comment. 

"Well, you're in a good mood this morning." He said sarcastically while 
rubbing his throbbing leg. She stuck out her tongue out at him and sat 
down to eat. 

"Onii-chan... about last night." 

"Don't worry... I'm sure things will work out for the best." 

"Thank You." 

"No prob. Now eat, growing Kaiju's need their food." 

She nodded and smiled. 

"IT' TIME TO EAT NOW." 

After breakfast, Touya collected the dishes as Sakura went and put on 
her rollerblades. She said that she was going to Tomoyo's and that she 
would be back for dinner. On her way there, she thought that she should 
get Tomoyo a gift to say she's sorry, but she didn't know what to give 
her. She ended up just getting a card made and a beautiful box with a 
ribbon to put it in. When she arrived, she was told that Tomoyo was 
still sleeping. 

"That's ok." She said as she headed for Tomoyo's room. 

She sat down on the bed, leaned over and whispered: "Tomoyo-chan... 
Tomoyo-chan, wake up." 

"Mmmm... Sakura? Is that you?" 

"It's me." 

"What are you doing here?" 

"I have something I need to give to you." She said while holding out her 
hands with her gift. 

"I've been so dense over these past years, and you've been hurt by that. 
Haven't you?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"Open your present and you'll see what I mean." 

Tomoyo satup and pulled up her sheets to cover her naked body. She 
opened the box to find a beautiful card that had a picture of her and 
Sakura when they were little in their School uniforms with their arms 
around each others waists. She looked up at Sakura who was crying and 
said that it was beautiful. 

"Open the card." 

Tomoyo opened the card and saw that it only had 2 words written by 
Sakura: "My Feeling." She turned the card overand on the back were the 
words: "My TRUE feeling." She looked up at Sakura with a single tear 
rolling down her cheek and asked: "But will you be happy?" 

Sakura grasps Tomoyo's chin and looks deep into her eyes. "Your 
happiness is my happiness."  

Tomoyo drops the box and plants her soft lips onto Sakura's. She drops 
her sheets and hugs Sakura as tightly as she can. 

"Thank you Sakura." She whispers into her ear. 

"You're very welcome." She embraces Tomoyo and the two of them fall to 
the bed staring into each others eyes. Not caring if anyone found them, 
who they were, or what they thought. All that mattered was that they 
were together. 

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