But Not for Me
Press "play".
What do you hear now? Is it a frivolous tune in a soberly elegant piano?
Yes it is.
You say that the room in which the piano was played is spacious, perhaps
decorated in grayish tones.
That's true too.
Yet, there's many things you don't know. Not that I blame you, they're
not obvious to you, that's all. They, like this melody, choose to act
behind a cover.
Like me.
Are you telling me that's not possible? That you could detect any sign of
unsettling, of distress? I'm afraid not this time, my dear. Not this nor
the times before.
Especially this time. While I play for you for one last time.
----------
And here you are before me as I show you what I've just learned under
Kerensky-sensei's stern, perfectionist methods. I introduce the piece to
you as "Love Walked In".
A piece title has never ever been so apt for an entrance on your behalf.
These fingers work the keys with gentleness, just like that you display
while tiptoeing to the window.
Must be the music. It goes like a grandiloquent whisper, a discreet
scream into the emptiness of the room.
That between you and me.
But there it goes! The notes entangle among themselves to take this old
piano, me, you!, to unsuspected heights. You now abandon that gloom that
had that gracious forehead leaned against the rain-stained glass of that
window. You smile, and start dancing. You raise your arms as if waltzing
with a ghost.
Must be the vaporous embodiment of my emotions. How I envy them at this
very moment!, for the undecipherable, nameless joy of your embrace shall
always to me remain a mystery.
An experience never to be lived.
Ah! My eyes, in their bluest, darkest glance, turn to you nevertheless.
They'll admire the dance, study your movements, your expressions, your
laughter, your silences, until they find the need to devour unstoppable.
Why you of all have to be here?! I'm bound to keep weaving the spell that
has you in this one occasion being all what an artist can wish from a
muse, from Love it- no, from Life itself!
The tone of the song goes in an over-cheery, slightly too emotional
flight. Simply jazzy. And the swing of your body, your swirling arms and
hands seem to dictate the tempo. Very well, A test to my skill, to what
I'd do for pleasing you.
Such a melodramatic perfection! I'm at awe and scared at the same time.
This desire of you has not from long ago reigned in my light and in my
darkness. I'd do anything to watch how the world dissolves and reinvents
itself in your angelic emerald sight.
I still want to leave this instrument and hesitantly sweep you off your
feet. Push you against the edge of this spiritual, physical abyss, and
have my fingers play in you the keys that'll move you to the deepest,
splendorous, desperate fiber. I'd make you wince in pain under my weight,
at my nails' burying trace. Love, love, LOVE!!! I'd make you cry like no
one has ever done, and still have the audacity to bring you back to
reality and out of it with a soul-taking kiss!
Yes, only I could have devised such fantasy. And adore it to pieces.
Alas, the melody has to end, and with it the trance in which we both
were.
One more note and you'd personally had witnessed me at the height of my
powers, and how after confronting the ally, the enemy in you, I would've
crumbled magnificently, slumped to my knees and implore the bubbly life,
the shrouding death from thee.
You'll never know. Ignorance is such a bliss.
A heaven that I've built and to which I've no access to.
Goodbye, love.
--------
Author's Notes:
The piano piece referred to in this fanfiction, which also happens to
lend its name for the title, is from the genial mind of George Gershwin.
Hear him, and let yourself be taken by the allure of classical and jazz
fusion. Cheers! > ^ _ ^ <
Back to Card Captor Sakura Shoujo-Ai Fanfiction