It turned out that Tori wasn't as scared off as we had initially thought. She turned up a few days later on Cat's doorstep with a case of soda and a cheesy smile.
“I thought we could hang out or something?”
“And you decided to bring soda?” I asked.
Her face dropped a little. “Well, I didn't think it would be a great idea to get wasted right away. Plus, we can have fun without being trashed.”
“Sure we can!” Cat exclaimed, taking the case of soda and skipping off into the kitchen.
How is it that I manage to attract the ditziest of people?
As Cat scurried about the kitchen, Tori took a seat on the couch and I took a seat on a weird, but comfy, armless chair. I wasn't really sure what to say to Tori. I had made ignoring her practically my profession in high school and now I sat across from her two years after we graduated trying to figure out how to be civil with her in hopes of fulfilling my sexual fantasy.
Er, I mean, Cat's sexual fantasy. Not cool brain. Not cool.
With a happy hum, Cat entered the living room holding a wooden tray with three cans of soda and a plate of crackers, cheese, and grapes. I was a little disappointed she hadn't cooked something. Believe it or not, Cat was a really good cook – yeah, I have no idea how that's possible either considering she had to follow written directions to tie her shoes until she was thirteen. Setting the tray down on the coffee table, she claimed the spot beside Tori and popped a grape into her mouth.
“Help yourself guys,” she smiled.
“Thanks, Cat,” Tori and I said at the same time.
I frowned as Tori blushed. This was getting off to be quite the awkward moment. Thankfully, Cat was there, serving as a divine bridge between the three of us and it quickly became a half-decent chat amongst the three of us. Mostly I talked to Cat or stared at Tori. It was fun intimidating her.
And I was beginning to find her blushing cute.
…
You know, in a way.
“I gotta tinkle. Be right back,” Cat said after she had finished her soda.
I waited until she left the room to turn on Tori and have some fun.
“Are you a virgin?” I asked with a predatory grin. I'll admit, I was curious about it considering the proposal that now had Tori sitting here.
Tori choked on the soda she'd been drinking. Possibly, I picked that time to ask her in hopes she would do just that. Possibly.
“What?” she asked when she had stopped choking.
“Have you ever been down and dirty with someone other than your hand before?”
Blushing brighter than I thought possibly for both her complexion and ethnicity, Tori took another swig of her soda and shook her head as she swallowed.
“No, I'm not.”
“Seriously?” I was honestly surprised. “Who was the unfortunate fellow?”
“Does it matter?”
“I rather know who you've touched before I touch you.” Well, if I touched her, I meant.
Making a face at this, but still blushing, Tori held her can of soda with both hands and let it rest in her lap.
“I slept with Andre before he moved to New York,” she said quietly.
Whoa, what?
“Whoa, what?” I said out loud. “Andre?”
At this point, Cat had just wandered back in from the bathroom and looked confused by my expression of shock.
“What happened with Andre?”
“Tori banged him!”
“Oh my god. For real, Tori?”
“Yeah.”
Tori lapsed into silence after that, her eyes cast down at her soda. This was all kind of unexpected, and I could tell from the look on her face that it had been something more than a quick little fling.
“Cat, can you run to my car and get my purse?” I said.
Looking confused, Cat looked around the room. “I thought you came up with it?”
“No. I left it in the car. Go get it for me.”
Frowning in confusion, Cat nodded. “Okay. I'll be back in a jiffy.”
When I heard Cat's front door close, I sat up in my seat, drawing Tori's attention. She didn't look like she wanted to say anything else on the matter but I was too curious to let it go. Nosy? Who?
“So what exactly happened between you and Andre?”
“I don't want to talk about it,” Tori said quietly.
“You know I'm not going to drop it so you might as well spill the beans.”
“Jade...” Tori pleaded softly.
Crossing my arms, I leaned back in my chair and quirked my studded eyebrow. I was going to get the story out of her through pure intimidation, if need be. If you got the glare, use it.
“Fine,” Tori finally relented, groaning. “It wasn't anything major. We were working on our last collaboration and he kind of blurted out that he had liked me for a long time.”
“And you liked him?”
“Yes and no. As a friend, I adore him, but beyond that, I never had anything but friendly thoughts toward him.”
“So how did you end up sleeping with him?”
Tori frowned and chewed on her lip for a moment before answering.
“I don't know. One minute we were singing and laughing, then Andre confessed to me how he'd always felt. I knew he was going to leave soon, so I... I kissed him. I meant it only to be a small, quick kiss, nothing more. I wanted to tell him that I thought it was sweet that he liked me but we never could be anything more than friends. But, then his hand was pressed lightly to the small of my back and I felt hot and cold all at the same time.” Tori got a far look in her eyes as she remembered the moment.
“So you just gave in to the whims of your body, huh?”
“Yeah, basically,” Tori smiled in embarrassment.
“What happened after that?”
“Nothing. We kind of laughed it off, but it felt kind of awkward, which was okay since Andre was leaving soon, but...”
“It changed your perception on him.”
“Yes. I still see him as nothing but a friend. What we did however felt wonderful and amazing but I know with every fiber in my being that it honestly could never be anything more a one time thing. I love him as a friend and nothing more. I know, I must sound like such a weirdo.”
Resting my cheek on my fist, I thought about it for a moment seriously. I understood what she had meant, but at the same time I didn't understand her at all. Then I thought about it, really thought it. For years, I went about screwing Beck and Cat. I loved them both, but if I really thought about it, my love for Beck reflected nothing more than the fact that he was someone who didn't fear me. He smiled at me even when I was pissed off at him. He never asked for anything, only gave to me what he could, because he cared and loved me. What I felt with him was genuine surprise at the fact that there was a person out there like him. I loved him because he could see past my glares and snark, but that was it. He'll always have a place in my heart because of who he is, not because of how I feel for him.
“No, you're not a weirdo,” I said seriously.
Tori looked up in surprise at my tone. She must've seen something on my face because instead of telling me not to tease her or something, she smiled at me. God, it was a beautiful smile. All of Tori's smiles were pretty, but occasionally she would smile this beautiful smile that would practically glow. Before I could even register the fact, I was moving forward, bridging the space between us. I could see her eyes grow wide in fear and confusion, then I saw the click as she realized I wasn't about to hurt her.
Instead, I kissed her.
It was like a million tiny explosions between our lips as I tasted Tori's lips for the first time. I felt the way I had when I had first kissed Cat, nervous and thrilled. My heart pounded as I really melted into the kiss, pushing Tori back against the couch. What I felt wasn't even sexual, not completely. It felt like I had won something. That feeling of victory seeped into my bones and made them feel like jelly as my skin crawled with electricity.
What is this? I've never felt like this before. It was scary.
Pulling away, I made the mistake of opening my eyes and looking at Tori's face as I began to stand up. The mistake here was that I could see whatever it was I felt reflected back at me on her face. We had had a moment.
Holy fuck. This was getting a little bit over my head now.
“I, uh, gotta go,” I said quickly, attempting to rein in my thoughts and feelings.
“Yeah, okay...” Tori said breathlessly.
I bumped into Cat at the front door and took my purse from her as I told her I'd call her later. I wanted to put as much distance between me and Tori as fast as possible. Opting for a quick escape down the stairs, I tried to figure out what the fuck had just happened.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
This was getting sticky.
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